Awkward shit

>>46122275
A loli summoner. My group is pretty chill.

>>46122348
That was an incredible experience. I loved how it was written.

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>>46122275

>FLGS organizes a series of newbie tournaments to get more people into mtg.
>attend to the tournament with a dilluted, common-only UR robots deck.
>I spend most of the day teaching noobs the basics and correct game ettiquette.
>Some 15 year old street urchin type player comes around to look at my cards.
>"Hey. You look with your eyes not with your hands"
>His hands are badly unkept, with long nails and quite greasy.
>I snatch my cards from his pig hands.
>"I tell you this not only as your senior, but also as a doctor: WASH YOUR HANDS AND TRIM YOUR NAILS. Then I turn my back on him"
>awkard silence for almost a whole minute.
>As I was saying, you also show respect or disrespect for your opponent with you hygine. There is no excuse for being filthy here or anywhere else.

>>46122513
Lorenzo?

>>46122719
Nope, sorry. This is Sam, the summoner was a different Sam.

>>46122323
>>46122348
Holy shit goddamn, on both counts

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>Playing MtG with highschool friends
>One of them has anger issues or something
>He tries to kill one of my creatures right after I activate one of it's abilities
>Explain that the activated ability still happens
>He says no
>Explain to him why it does
>He starts speaking louder and louder
>Explodes and calls me a motherfucker in front of my other friends out loud
>Awkward silence
>Realize my only way of going back home is with one of my friends in his car so I have to wait another hour playing with this fucking idiot and I can't leave yet

Another one from that guy:

>Playing Risk
>This shithead does something he cannot do
>Immediately pick the rules book and read that part, and tell him he can't do it
>Slams the table full force with his fists
>Miniature soldiers fly off the table
>Risk game is over

Nerds are the worst kind of human. I'd rather play with my alhpa friends 1000 times over having to play with an antisocial virgin.

>>46122348
The urge to kick the guys ass just by reading this is real

>>46122975

This is the very reason I print out a copy of the whole comprehensive rules. I even made it into a booklet to be able to carry it around. Also, having an actual lawyer in our playgroup helps to run things smoothly.

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>>46122323

>The game ended rather early, because that one player ended up refusing to have his characters head inserted into the woman's ass so that he could suck off the baby's dick when we reinserted it

what

>>46122323
>that spoiler
topkek

>>46122564
I love you

>be playing 5E mines of phalander or whatever
>be half elf bard
>be playing at players house
>GM's wife /baby momma goes to hang out with sone chick with their infant
>2 hours in game and weve fucked up the red brands
>fun insues and good times were being had
>baby mama comes back and is dropped off by friend
>says "im ready to leave"
>everyone goes quiet
>GM: "were in the middle of the game..."
>"I said in ready"
>All the players look ackwardly at one another
>gm: sighs and does what the bitch says
>they leave
>room decompresses and we say "what a bitch"
>plays 8 man smash
Needless to say, they divorced and he became a trucker

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>be 13 years old
>play V:tM with highschool friends where a friend is GMing
>invite a girl of our group
>she was into yaoi
>she complains a lot until she's allowed to play a 40 years old office worker with an underage fuckboi

I don't think I need to continue.

>>46123905
please do continue

>>46123905
Everyone I've played WoD with has been really cool, I really want to hear how bad it was
What clan was she, was the fuckboy her ghoul, what happened in the chronicle?

>>46122975
It isn't so much being a nerd or being alpha, it's being a belligerent cunt. Both groups have belligerent cunts. Being laid back and there to have fun is the most important thing about /tg/ games imo.

>>46123543
I'm glad I'm gay

I rarely hear positive reviews of women desu.

>>46124282
>>46124338

My experiences with WoD have been rather good, the issues just being that everyone in my group were awful understanding the systems and making decent plots, and that girl.

I haven't played oWoD since forever, but if I recall correctly she was a toreador and her fuckboy was just some guy she fucked before she became a vampire, but she had plans of making him into a ghoul at some point.
The campaign didn't get too far, luckily, mostly because this girl tried to derail the campaign into her magical realm over and over until it stopped being fun. The GM didn't have the balls to tell her no, but he'd put actual in plot obstacles to stop her from doing some freaky stuff to "make the game more mature and interesting".

At least in our last session she tried to convince a group of vampires of having an orgy, her suggestion wasn't well received and she was almost killed.
Good ending I guess.

>>46124550
Aw, but man, magical realming IS how you make plot in world of darkness, but I have yet to meet anyone who seriously did it and not just getting into a character

>>46124478
I chalk that up to no one wanting to talk about their nice, stable relationships. A story about a couple with no overt issues or conflicts is boring as fuck; unless you're gloating (haha I've got a 9/10 girlfriend that GMs Savage Words and she rocks sucks to be you losers) there's no reason to really bring it up.

Also trust me, bringing in *any* significant other is disaster for any group. While the makeup of our hobby means this is mostly horror stories of guys bringing their girlfriends, I've personally had a group fall to a girl bringing her boyfriend and another to a gay dude bringing his boyfriend. Some people are just assholes, whether they've got a vag or a dick, and can't stand not being the center of their partner's attention.

>>46124616
I know senpai, but we were 13 years old nerds, we just wanted to kill monsters and be cool like in our japanese animes.

I wish I could run a W:tA magical realm campaign someday

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>>46122323

Most awkward situation was ith my first gaming group. We usually played at the DM's place which was pretty chill, but one day we couldn't because his parents had people over so we couldn't use the livingroom table. So instead, we decided to play at one of the other players' house.

Which would have been ok since he had enough space and he stocked up on more snacks and drinks than we usually had, but there was one problem. We were only allowed to play games there if his mother and sister could also play. Not sure how that came to be, but apparently it was their way or the highway, and the guy had already helped them prepare their characters so we were like whatever, let's roll with it.

The sister was ok. She was nice enough, though I guess she was a bit intimidated. She was like 12 or 13 and we were all 16ish so in hindsight that wasn't very surprising. She played an elven thief character and said or did very little, so I took on the task of occasionally encouraging her to get more involved in the game. At those times she'd perk right up and happily did whatever I told her to do, only to go back to passive silence afterwards. Since we didn't have a thief in the party, she came in handy more than once that day, which she seemed to enjoy.

Nothing too weird, the DM's mom would sometimes walk in and start a yelling match with him for a couple of minutes

>>46125071
The mother... was a different story. I never found out WHY she wanted to join in the first place, because she obviously had zero interest in the game. She had a a sorceress character, don't remember what race, but she never once acted in-character, and barely paid any attention to what was going on in the game. Whenever she did do something it was without exception something pointless and inappropriate and for some reason, always phrased as a question. Like, we'd walk into a room and she'd suddenly go "can I shoot a fireball at the door?" And we'd be like "why would you do that, the door was open, we literally just walked through it" and she'd be like "yeah but can I shoot a fireball at it?" Stuff like that.

Which was annoying enough on its own (combined with the fact that a bunch of 16 year old boys were playing D&D with some guy's mom), but nothing compared to her only other 'contribution' to the game, which was to OOCly downtalk just about everything we said, especially the DM's descriptions of every room, object and NPC. Our only saving grace was that, as mentioned before, that she barely paid any attention to the game so it never got to the point where it completely ruined the game, but it was still grating as fuck.

Needless to say, we didn't play at that guy's house anymore.

>>46124478
How is it like being gay?
I mean specifically the non-sex part of the relationships

>>46125873
Your boyfriend is your best friend.
Have fun doing all the shit that you like doing without the typical complains of a girl.

>>46125945
Shit, I wanna be gay now, but I have no attraction to men.

>>46126075
You realize it's the same thing with a girlfriend right?

>>46125945
I have never seen a gay relationship without bitching and quarreling.

>>46122975
>Playing Risk
there was your first mistake

>>46123134
Get rekt Captain Save-a-Ho. Literally the only reason why he can get away with this is because she wants it.

>>46126285
This.

Gay men can be just as catty as women

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>>46126120
Not that anon, but not for me it isn't.
Very attractive girlfriend, highly intelligent and well educated, very kinky and great job (she's a clinical shrink).
Only thing is, she hates video games, won't consider playing a TTRPG and will only play a board game maybe once every 6 months. The only hobby we share is fashion.

>>46126075
It usually depends on the man though, you can end up with a man that behaves like a girl which is plain awful and rather common, sadly.

Protip: Date rugby players.

>>46126120
This is a good reminder, yet the amount of girls that are bros is noticeably smaller.

>>46126285
The same could be said about any relationship, but feminine guys tend to exalt the worst aspects of femineity, becoming some terrible narcissists unable to feel empathy.

>>46125873
they are either insufferable, or a pretty cool dude.

still waiting on a pretty cool dude for myself...

>>46126120
>You realize it's the same thing with a girlfriend right?
No, not at all. Not even women can stand other women. A girlfriend isn't like a best friend, it's like a little girl you're awkwardly friends with but can fuck without being called a pedo.

>>46126679
What a shame. Couples should at least try the other hobbies, help a lot on the relationship health being able to talk about your hobbies to your partner.
I got lucky an my gf and I share almost but not all hobbies.

>>46126785
*tips fedora*

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>>46126834
>Couples should at least try the other hobbies
Look at it from the female perspective: why should she bother with your nerd hobbies? "Muh relationship"? Oh please, there are at least a hundred men out there willing to pay for the privilege of sniffing her farts. Women are the selective gender, so unless you're a top tier guy with a lot of options they don't need to do shit for you.

>>46126841
Nice meme! You are a gentleman and a scholar. I give you one le upboat and all le internets xD

>>46126785
>>46126907
Jeez man, not all women are evil harlots, granted a lot are, but don't let that embitter you, that's an awful way to live

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>>46126834
She'll play a video game very briefly or something after a fight to feign interest in what I like but that's as far as she'll go. Her views are basically "we have very separate lives, we can enjoy what we like away from each other." I'm very jealous of you anon. Good luck with your missus.

>>46126834
That's the thing, women are much less open to try doing new stuff than men. They're not impulsive enough, at least not in the right things, and it's harder to do activities together with them unless you're doing something that she enjoys.

I had some good experiences with my ex in that aspect, he was a sportsman and he wasn't into "nerdy shit", but once I asked him, he became pretty open to try it out and he ended up enjoying it a lot.

>>46122323
holy fuck. my ribs hurt from laughing.

>>46126907
man you have a really depressing view of things. I hope you enjoy realising you hate your wife at 40 but also realise you are way too old to find someone you actually want to be with.

Seriously though, the only time I have dated a girl I didn't share most of my hobbies with it was a fucking shit show.

>All this /r9k/ ITT
Holy fuck consider suicide

>>46126679

I see, Rick Owens is what I usually wear

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>>46126950
>granted a lot are, but don't let that embitter you
Let me get this straight: either you're bitter or you forget how probability works? Welp, better spend all my disposable income on lottery tickets, Russian roulette and cigarettes and simply hope that I live until the ripe age of 94 with my skull intact and enough money to buy a small country.

>>46127033
>I hope you enjoy realising you hate your wife at 40 but also realise you are way too old to find someone you actually want to be with.
That's why I'm not getting married, dingus. This is exactly what happens to morons who get married in this cultural and legal climate.

Why even bother when prostitutes are cheaper and safer?
>In b4 a prostitute will never love you
Neither will most other women. Prostitutes don't demand alimony though.

>>46127087
If I wanted to kill myself I'd get married and then divorced. For some inexplicable reason male suicide rates spike after divorces but female suicide rates do not.

>usually play stereotypical manly barbarian smash em guy
>decide to play opposite just to switch things up
>shy and pacifistic lady healer
>mostly social skills
>tries to avoid combat and uses non-lethal stuns when not able to hide while making sure no one on either side dies
>end up being captured at some point
>one of the other PC's saves me and does this whole knight in shining armor routine
>really cliche but funny
>our characters end up falling in love
>our relationship ends up a big part of the story
>OOG the rest of the group calls us boyfriend and girlfriend
>even his RL girlfriend jokes about it
>we dress up as our characters and pretend to have sex
>cut to a few months later
>his real gf walked in on us LARPING
>freaks out
>she breaks up with him
>now he call me her name every time we play our own campaign at his place
>i have no idea how to tell him how uncomfortable it makes me

>>46127087

My girlfriend and me have no idea what you're talking about, are you okay, pal? Maybe you need to drink some brews and light a joint and relax a little

>>46127019
>That's the thing, women are much less open to try doing new stuff than men.

I have never experienced that, hell I have seen the reverse of that . Granted maybe that is just the kind of people I hang around with but most of the women I have known have been way more likely to not only try out something new but also follow up on the idea of doing something.

>>46127136
Nigg das gay

>>46127136
I....what?

>his real gf walked in on us LARPING

is that what the kids are calling it these days?

>>46126285
>I have never seen a relationship without bitching and quarreling

FTFY

couples have differing opinions and fight about them.

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>>46127136

>>46127001
If that works for you two it's ok, but in general it's not what I expect from a partner. Good luck anon.

>>46126907
Because if you love someone you want to know about them and their hobbies and spend time together. And believe it or not, most girls are human beings with empathy, curiosity, etc.

>>46127019
While that my be true, it's also how you sell it. A night with nerds playing pretend doesn't sound to good, a night with some friends, beers and board games (start slow) sounds a lot better.

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>>46127136
>we dress up as our characters and pretend to have sex

This is where you lost me.

>>46127001
I'm sure you give her the utmost attention and respect for her interests in makeup and romcoms.

Once upon a time our group was playing a post-apoc mostly-narrative game, and we were doing our character backgrounds.
Now, one of the gimmicks of this part, was that we described a scene of conflict, and everyone else, including the GM could choose to make it harder, easier, or abstain.
Most of them were fairly tame: arguments, and a shoving match. Then it was her turn. Now, I'll say that she was a regular player, and (as far as I know, still is) had been in the group far longer than me; so she wasn't a That Girl.
She described as she walked home from the factory she worked at, took a turn down an ally, and was set upon by ill-intentioned persons. She wasn't specific about their interests, but spoke of their appreciation of her physique. She finishes the scene, and the GM gives a big ol' "Nope!" and abstains. I, and all the rest do likewise.

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>>46127113
Me too famalam.

>>46127001
>we have very separate lives, we can enjoy what we like away from each other.
Dear god, why even bother? A relationship like that sounds like torture. I can't imagine how two people can feel that way about eachother and still like eachother enough to want to stay in a relationship.

>>46126075
You do realize you can have a best friend, and not potentially ruin the relationship by having it revolve around sex, right?

Gay relationships are notoriously short, and typically end disastrously. It's what happens when people from a extremely tiny minority seek each other out for the purpose of sex as their primary goal, and this "beggars-can't-be-choosers" kind of business usually leaves them in unhealthy relationships that they force themselves to be happy in until they explode.

It's significantly better to just be straight and not devoting your lifestyle to satisfying a purposeless urge that leads to the male homosexual community to have the highest rate of STD transference despite being barely a full percent of the population.

>>46126679
Cosplay?

>>46126075
>Going gay not out of sexual/emotional attraction but because you've completely given up on a gender

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8_7Orhey-g

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>>46127411
Crippling insecurity helps me soldier on

>>46127505
It's just a "legitimate" a reason.
Next thing you know you're going to tell me that homosexuality has something to do with "love."

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>>46122275
pretty sure I've posted this here before but
>"so that archetypes sorta like your default bad-ass heavy combat guy or if you were more keen on social stuff theirs the..
> "what about this one the The maestro d'?"
> " oh yeah they run the local saloon or brothel or whatever you want."
> so whats the age limit on the prostitutes like 13?"
>"lets just not go there"
>"sure sure so just if theirs grass on the pitch then"
>"..."
this was the first time we'd met the guy. I mean I get that just because you want to play something doesn't mean you are seriously into that kinda thing but who just assumes a group of people he's never met before are up for a campaign running a child brothel.

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>>46127487
Nah, she can't stand cosplay.

>>46127154
While my generalization was rather wide, I still consider that you're a pretty lucky man.
Personally, girls would almost never propose things to do, would complain about what you suggested and then bitch while they're doing it, even if they enjoy it.
Still, hold girls like the ones you're mentioning as if they were a holy grail: They can be fucking awesome friends.

>>46127261
Oh, certainly. I have convinced my share of girls to join my games in the past thanks to a more tactful approach, but they still feel pretty vulnerable when they're outside of their comfort zone, even if they are in a safe and private environment.

>>46127437
>"beggars-can't-be-choosers"
senpai, anyone with that mentality is incapable of holding a meaningful relationship in their lives because it's inherently self destructive, be it an homosexual or heterosexual.

>>46122323
I'm going to hell for laughing at this as hard as I did.

>>46127114
Kill yourself

>>46122323
Fall_of_the_Eldar.jpg

I remember a time I ran a game for three total noobs, it nearly ended in a fist fight.

>Be me
>Be in college
>One of the girls on the course wants to play a RPG
>Mention I have DMed
>She grabs one other girl and her BF and we meet up at my flat to play.
>I decide to go rules light with a game of Dog in The Vineyard
>The first session is just me explaining the kind of world it is and how to make a char
>Both the girl that suggested it and her BF make good chars
>They get the setting and keep things simple with a few nice hooks for later stories
>the other girl
>Dear god
>She explains how she is the daughter of the Mayor of the only city in the setting who is also a master gunsmith
>Because of this she has a perfect horse a perfect gun. She is a master of diplomacy and is basically perfect in every single way
>We then spend nearly TWO HOURS trying to explain why it would not make any sense for her char to join up with the Dogs who are basically glorified postmen
>By the end of it she is nearly in tears and the rest of us are angry as all hell.
>She gives in and makes a new char
>We break for the night

And we never played another game

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this thread started out as funny. then it became awkward.

>THIS THREAD IS NOW META
>THIS POST IS META
>OH GOD IM HAVING META META THOUGHTS AND THOUGHTS ABOUT META
>AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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>>46127693
It's a safer way to look at things these days.
It's just wasted energy getting all pissy about it like robots do, but in all honesty, guys like me have very little chance, why bother getting married to someone who's just looking to settle down after going crazy in their youth and will likely just divorce you and get half your shit for free a year later?

>>46127674
True, but heterosexuals may be in that mindset, while homosexuals must be in that mindset.

Welcome to the disadvantages of being a unwanted evolutionary dead end that is a minuscule minority among minorities. There are more people who have sex with dogs then there are homosexuals, though I wouldn't be surprised if there wasn't a great amount of overlap between those two statistics.

>>46123134
By the way it's written and narrated, it clearly did not actually take place.

>>46127977
>There are more people who have sex with dogs then there are homosexuals
[citation fucking needed]

>>46128080
It's just the usual anit-gay talking points, expect a pedo reference next.

Muh traiditional marriage

>>46127977
>heterosexuals may be in that mindset, while homosexuals must be in that mindset
>people can't prefer manliness rather than femineity with sexuality as a secondary element

>>46124768
>W:tA
I don't know much about World of Darkness, other than that it has vampires and stuff. All I could find by looking that up was Warlock: The Armageddon, which was a movie.

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>>46127914
im 23 and have fucked 18 people. I'm looking for that one person i can fuck all day long and they dont bore me.

my advice is this. do not be under whelming to your partner, out class your partner.

give them the best sex ever and they wont cheat. be a bit of a dick to show ur human. Play video games while on the phone. Tell them the silly little shit in your games. Never use a condom. push their boundaries. smoke dank. listen to good music, watch good movies. have a plan to kill her and keep this in mind. "is she a cunt?"

my biggest piece of advice
say it in under 10 words per sentence

>>46127977
bisexual mindset here
>hetero and homo are both easily predictable

also
>dog fucking
kek

>>46128080
seriously needed

>>46128154
chubby women with muscles are best women for making babies and helping me slaughter my enemies

>>46128182
Sorry, I don't quite understand the acronyms, but I meant Werewolf: The Apocalypse

>>46124687
>bringing in *any* significant other is disaster for any group.
One of my best friends met his boyfriend through D&D, and we all continue to have awesome games together.

>>46128182
Werewolf: the Apocalypse

>>46128275
... identifies as?

>>46128275
Woah, dude, GR15.

But, in all seriousness, do tell.

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>>46128080
Depends on what source you want to follow. Quick google search pulls up Kinsey with an 8% figure for men, but that's Kinsey who always fluffed up his numbers. Then we've got Hunt, who puts it at a 4.9 with a later study.

Either of those numbers is higher than the always-below-4% for all homosexuals, and that's with the more liberal sources. Most moderate sources place the number at between 2%-3%.

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>>46126683
>but feminine guys tend to exalt the worst aspects of femineity, becoming some terrible narcissists unable to feel empathy.
So, elves?

>>46128275
ignore the cunts. you're better than them.

>>46127553
>It's just a "legitimate" a reason.
???

>>46128275
>he identifies as the one in the air mixed with the second from the left.

I'm not even gonna ask how he decided on those two of all horses to blend together. Tell him he has shit taste.

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>>46126683
>but feminine guys tend to exalt the worst aspects of femineity
Does that imply femininity has good aspects? At all?

>>46128346
>good aspects
it makes babies out of a warm fuck hole?

>>46128122
>expect a pedo reference next
Considering the exceptionally high percentage of homosexual pedophiles, it's not shocking if that gets mentioned.

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>>46128190
>do not be under whelming to your partner, out class your partner
And that's where I'm pretty much fucked. Who the fuck is a robot going to outclass? The only thing I have over the more vocal of /r9k/ is that I don't keep a chip on my shoulder about it or hate women on principle.

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>>46128437
>Who the fuck is a robot going to outclass?
You ask "who" when you should be asking "why". If, as a man, you're expected to outclass a woman then what the fuck does the woman offer? Especially when you consider modern women can't even cook and clean, two tasks so simple a well trained monkey could do it. He won't earn any Michelin stars, but he'll get something edible on the table.

>>46128437
At being pathetic?

Start changing your diet and going to the gym.

>>46122323
And they call themselves The Aristocrats.

>>46128437
>>46128498
you out class the women so you can hold yourself to a higher standard. confidence helps, but being able to literally out fuck 80 other men is the best thing i've got going for me.

i use sex as an ice breaker.... plus i only go after crazy bitches on purpose as they're more loving and clingy. then you can slowly shape them. like your own personal frankenstein monster using sex as the incentive.

>>46128569
>bad advice, the post

>>46128569
>putting it in crazy
rip in peace anon

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>>46128275
Here goes,

This was one of my first outings so it might come off poorly written.

at the table is me fighter, friend ranger, Grill is cleric, Pony dm is a druid to round out group. Another grill is in the shop but shes alone at another table and is unresponsive to human conversation. She through her rat avatar (waved a live rat at me and squeaked then would text someone what "she wanted to say") would "speak"

adventure starts off normal we are to clear a mine of kohbolds, rat girl objects to this, pony dm claims "rats are not pure as ponys" and we begin murdering tons of these creatures. as we get to the end of the adventure, His pony wife is in the cage guarded by the king Kobold. During the course of the fight the ranger rolls a 1 to attack. Pony dm says it flys off in a random direction. It ends up hitting his pony wife. Rat girl chuckles. Pony dm decides wife needs all the care, mid fight, in druid character he demands the cleric heals the NPC? pony.

>>46128613
>sticking it in crazy
I like to live dangerously.

>>46128606
its better than the D.E.N.N.I.S. system.

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>>46128606
>>46128613
I don't see the problem.

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>>46128694
You know she nearly killed the MC multiple times and probably has a kill count in the double digits, right?

I prefer a slightly safer kind of crazy.

>>46128498
The point is, guys like me are pretty much bottom rung dudes anyways, we're pretty fucked (or not fucked in this case) so it's just silly to get all pissy and angry at women for logically not wanting to fuck us.

>>46128694
>>46128748
>kill count
that's wife material right there. you want a woman who can have your babies AND keep you on your toes. remember to keep her out classed. if she terrifies you, you've gotta terrify her back in a different way she has no resistance too.

for instance, my one ex, once chased a dude down who pissed her off and stabbed him in the leg with a steak knife. Later that day, I did laps around a parking lot abusing my E brake and front wheel drive.
>balance

>>46128860
make them want you. or use OKcupid or Plenty of Fish. magical power of the internet cuts time in half. there's also tinder and snap chat.

Is there a "worst thread on /tg/" image?

This deserves it.And that's saying something right now.

>>46128975
>i'm purposely trying dammit

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>>46128671
After some argueing the cleric is healing the pony and this gives him a reason to shapshift. Can you guess what he turns in to ? GamePro Tip of the century: it was a pony.
We kill the kobold king and release the pony. Which he begins to Nuzzle to put it lightly.

*BLING* rat grill texts friend.
(my /v/ attention span is timing out)
Long story short. Cleric & friend start killing wife pony and feeding it to pony dm.

He spouts some memes and ends up wetting his pants in his uncontroable fit of rage.
The owner of the store grabs a new pair of sweatpants from behind the counter hands them to him.
He begins chaingin his pants infront of us while telling us how two ponies in love are invinicalbe. The game degenerated from there and I ended up playing smash for untill we left.

The hwole store smelt like urine and bo.
It was my first time to a /tg/ game and i watched a grown man wet himself and a rat shaman tear him down.

>>46127630
Sonichu and Fanta? I can't think of a better way to spend my Saturday.

>>46128671
>She through her rat avatar (waved a live rat at me and squeaked then would text someone what "she wanted to say") would "speak"

Wait what.

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>>46129003
...Jesus fucking Christ.

>>46129003
i don't go to local game stores because of the overwhelming BO smell from the people that frequent the places. Its either BO, weed, beer, or some sort of cheesy/bbq snack smell. No matter how many times the company moves locations, the smell follows

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>>46128671
>>46129003

>mfw

I choose to believe this story is true regardless of everything in it.

>>46129060
Girl brings rat with her to shop. Faces away from our game. Held rat in right hand. waves it in air while making squeaking noises. Then will text people the "translation"

I dont know how else to put it. Its like she used the live rat as a puppet and she spoke"rat"

>>46129195
That should seriously qualify as animal cruelty.

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>>46129195

Where the fuck do you find these people?

>>46127214
I would read a whole series of books about these two characters' adventures together

>>46129221
>animal cruelty
what if it was snek?

>>46129195
I find that...endearing, actually.

What's wrong with me?

>>46129003
I refuse to believe this is real.

I have met a meme spouting land whale neckbeard from /v/ irl and even he was not that bad

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>>46129195

>>46128569
This virgin is trying too hard.

>>46127781
The fact that that skeleton has inner throat components disturbs me

>>46129329
you're just jelly you didn't try it first

>>46129360
its the spine hole

>>46129261
Boston. Gaming lounges are getting popular here. Slum around boston for a bit, I bet you meet one of the other people that was there tonight. A black kid with a triforce tattooed on his hand.

>>46128154
He's saying that, because being gay is less common, it's harder for gay people to find significant others with whom they have more in common than being gay. I don't agree with the other stuff he said.

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>>46128549
I understood that reference.

>>46129270
Same

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In a World War II campaign, we were infiltrating Nazi Germany disguised as SS officers. One of the players saw this as a perfect opportunity to act out his rape fantasies on a Jewish NPC, and we were all too stunned to step in. When it was finally over, he made a spontaneous dice roll (without consulting the GM) to see if he could "mind-break" his victim, hentai-style. According to him, he passed.

Later on in the same campaign, he decided that his character was in fact a Nazi double agent and began plotting to sabotage all of our missions. He succeeded, and I wound up trapped beneath a building he "accidentally" demolished while I was in it. The GM was probably expecting him to make a token rescue effort, but instead our Nazi agent fled the scene, leaving me to bleed out.

My next character made the decision to replace the Nazi's ammo with blanks after he witnessed him murdering some British civilians. Unfortunately, this left us outgunned in the next combat encounter and the entire party was wiped out. I think the GM was deliberately trying to end the campaign, and I don't blame him. Everyone except for Mr. Nazi was quite relieved.

Our new campaign is Star Wars, and he's playing a Force-user with secret ties to the Empire. It's basically the same character.

>>46129873
>rape fantasies
>star wars
>force user

Oh boy, you are in for a world of shit

>>46122348
Ah, a classic

>>46128190

>give her the best sex ever and she won't cheat

sorry, lad, but that is absolutely untrue I'm speaking from experience here

>>46130237

Some guy gave you the best sex ever and you cheated on him?

>>46125873
Imagine having a best friend, who knows you on a more personal level who is also someone you bone, and can lean on for emotional support.

>>46130410
>who knows you on a more personal level

Ha. This is what faggots actually believe.
I'm assuming you also had sex with your parents in order to establish a "personal" connection.

>>46130482
Or that my husband knows more about the horrific things that have happened to me, and is the only one. Not to mention, we've been together for 8 years this April.

>>46130482
I really hope you are trolling otherwise you have one of the saddest outlooks I have ever heard of.

>>46130660
So what? I've got best friends who I don't fuck who I've known for the better part of 20 years, and we've literally risked and saved each other's lives. We don't have to tell each other about the most horrific things, because we experienced them together.

And you're going to try and tell me that you know your husband better because he sticks his dick inside of you. For shame.

>>46130482
You're a pretty sad little man. Who hurt you so much?

>>46130660
>>46130702
>>46130748
>sex makes it more personal

Cute fallacy. Too bad fags spend far more time disproving it rather than supporting it.

Sure, heterosexuals contribute to the dismantling of that myth, but nowhere to the degree that fags do.

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>>46130739
I'm not a terribly social person, but having someone who I love like that, and can confide things that really fucked with me knowing that he'll care, and genuinely do his best to help me feels nice. Good for you and your friends, but having a bond with a dude like him is nice, and I didn't mean that I knew him better because I'm screwing him, I meant I knew him better, because I spend a lot more time with him than my other friends, sorry if I sounded like I was saying the prior.

>>46130739
I find it hard to believe that you've been friends with someone for 20 years. Actually, I find it hard for you to have friends at all.

>>46130806
Sorry, I didn't mean to say it like having sex with him makes it more personal, but when you're in a relationship, you tend to spend a lot more time with a person, and start to notice how they act, speak, react, and things like that.

>>46130817
Let me repeat your own statement back to you.

>Imagine having a best friend, who knows you on a more personal level

Well, looks like you think having sex with the guy makes it "more personal."
And, that makes it clear why you're not a "social" person, because you suffer from a mental disease and have dependency issues.

>>46130806
I wasn't disproving or supporting anything, I was just wondering about your own emotional health.

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>>46130906
Well yeah, it's like having a friend, and he'd know me a lot more, because of how much time he spends with me. Have you been in a relationship before anon? Do you know how much more time a person spends around you when you do?

>>46130748
>>46130702
>sad
>for not making sex and relationships out to be this glorious thing everyone is just missing out on

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>>46130990
>Implying a relationship with someone who cares about you as much as you care about them isn't the shit
Sounds like you've never had either anon.

>>46130855
What you're hoping to try and say is that a homosexual "relationship" is more personal than what two heterosexual people can have, and that's precisely why it's perfectly fine to call you a living disease.

Seriously. If you think that because you chat about the color of the drapes and you share the stories of how you were bullied in school and how your fathers molested you, all just so you can eventually stick your dicks in each other's assholes, and that somehow makes it an incomparatively personal relationship, then you're the exact kind of faggots that need to take your special snowflake status and try sticking that up each other's asses instead.

>>46130990
It's okay to admit that you can't get laid or have someone to care about you, but don't be like the fox and assume that the grapes are sour.

>>46130482
You're clearly misinterpreting the post of the person you're replying to. Never did they say sex was their method of establishing connection. You're mixing up the order of events.

>>46130935
Compared to faggots who think the only person they can lean on for emotional support is the guy who is putting his dick in their ass, I'd say my emotional health shouldn't be your first concern.

>>46131013
>>46131046
I just find it funny that 'sad' is the first immediate response to someone not having that "grass is always greener" mindset.
I know nothing about you or the anon that started this, but it's just something I always see.

>>46131036
I actually assumed a heterosexual relation was much the same, and it was like having a best friend. The straight friends I've asked have said that it was like having a best friend with tits, I wouldn't exactly know though, but I don't think you would either. We don't talk about drape colors, it's more often what 40k army were going to build next, and my father and his didn't molest either of us actually. I'm not exactly sure why you're so mad right now.

>>46122564
thank you

>>46131076
I mean, the idea that out of every person that anon is around, not a single one of them finds that anon attractive, nice, or have any good enough traits to find as a suitable person to date is pretty depressing.

>>46131061
>Never did they say sex was their method of establishing connection.

Outside of the whole "being gay is like having a more personal relationship with your best friend because you fuck him" part?

Remember, this guy tried to explain the difference between homosexuals and heterosexuals, and he decided to pretend that their relationships are somehow more "personal." What's the difference between the relationship of two heterosexual men and two homosexual men? If you think it's time spent, that's hardly it. If you think it's sharing certain things, that's not it either.

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>>46131128
>I mean, the idea that out of every person that anon is around, not a single one of them finds that anon attractive, nice, or have any good enough traits to find as a suitable person to date is pretty depressing
That one actually hurt, I want to go back to joking about crazy chicks, that was fun.

>>46131076
Who knows if you will like a relationship or not, but you'll never know if you don't give it a shot. Maybe the grapes are sweet, maybe they're sour as you assume them to be, but unless you give the first step you'll never know, yet with your stagnant mindset I doubt you'll ever try to find out because you're too full of yourself, justifying every situation with your "flawless" logic.

And that's pretty pathetic.

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>>46131164
I'm not going to sugar coat it for you anon. If you're so bitter like the guy above me that you can't scrape together enough good qualities to make yourself someone another person would want to spend a considerable portion of time with, you only have yourself to blame.

>>46131099
>We don't talk about drape colors, it's more often what 40k army were going to build next

I know you're just tried to avoid looking like the stereotypical gay, but you wound up looking gayer than if you had just admitted that you had a fight just this morning over whether the drapes should be fishbone beige or salmon.

>>46130739
>>46130482
>>46130806
>>46131036
I’m not this anon >>46130410 but here is a lesson:
>Imagine having a best friend, who knows you on a more personal level who is also someone you bone
By writing both “knows you on a more personal level” and “someone you bone” separately, the anon signifies that the two are separate concepts.
Your subsequent posts missing that fact indicates that you are a moron, so mad about not having sex that you missed it, and/or suck at reading comprehension.
Actually, your posts have pretty solidly proven you are an assmad moron arguing about something nobody else is talking about, making you a trifecta of shitposting awfulness.

>>46131099
>>46130855
Relax anon, you were perfectly clear.
That anon is just an idiot.

>>46124478
>>46126631
>>46126683
>>46126785
>>46126907
>>46127019
>>46127033
>>46127114
>>46127154
>>46127674
>>46127914
>>46128498
>>46128860
All this generalizing complex individuals into a couple simplistic traits.

>>46127261
>And believe it or not, most girls are human beings with empathy, curiosity, etc.
So much this.

The problem with women is that they are people.
And people are just the worst.
However, every so often you meet a person that is decent and actually worth your time.
If you and that person share an attraction, a relationship can develop.
That relationship will continue, getting better or worse, until it ends.
That is all.

Putting whole groups of people into categories with generalized traits and labels does nothing but limit how you see them, limit how you respond to them, and generally restrict your relationships to whatever limits you’ve arbitrarily placed on how you see the people around you.
You’re not dating a gender, you are dating an individual.


>>46126907
>Women are the selective gender, so unless you're a top tier guy with a lot of options they don't need to do shit for you.
Unless they happen to be a human being that is actually interested in person they chose to be in a relationship with?

Relationships work best with mutual respect. Most bad relationships begin with at least one member ignoring this until the imbalance erupts.
Problems arise.
Arguments occur.
Emotions flare.
Resolve all of them with an approach of mutual respect and caring and you’ll be all right.


>>46127033
>Seriously though, the only time I have dated a girl I didn't share most of my hobbies with it was a fucking shit show.
>…girl ...it
I think I might see your problem anon.
If you consider a girl an “it” you may already be too far gone.
heh

>>46131266
>If you consider a girl an “it” you may already be too far gone.
Hey, illiterate, anon obviously means the RELATIONSHIP by 'it'.

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>>46131238
Guess what's gayer. Him and I main Eldar, and have extensive armies, mostly Saim-Hann, but we're starting a 30k Iron Warriors project.

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>>46131205
I'm not really a bitter person, too much effort. I'm firmly in the belief it'll happen when it happens.

Doesn't mean it doesn't sometimes hurt a little bit to be reminded of that.

>>46131205
Not that anon, but I feel the same way. I have no one to blame but myself for being unloveable.

>>46131331
>too much effort.
And this is why nothing will ever improve.
You are lazy, and that makes you less than worthwhile.

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>>46131331
Only if you put yourself out there anon
Perturabo believes in you anon

>>46131331
I'm in the same boat as you.

>>46131099
>gay couple
>discussing what 40k army are they going to build next
>not discussing about OSR modules

srsly????

>>46131245
Please. You're an idiot for trying to force a separation, as if there was some other distinction between two best friends and two homosexual lovers.

What's the difference, outside of that the gays joined up for all the wrong reasons and likely stay together because of unhealthy dependency issues? Oh yeah, it's the whole sex thing.

Really, I get it, you're a fag and are hoping to try and pretend that you need to fuck a person in order to love them, but that's hardly the case. I can easily say that I love my friends far more than you love any of your fuccbois, and that comes from me having spent far more time and adventures with them than you've probably spent with anyone in your entire life. If we want to talk about assmad, look at how pissed off you are that someone is calling you out on your fallacies, and forcing you to try and backtrack for someone else.

As far as idiots and morons go, I'm going to have to take a knee, because I've certainly found the king.

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Goddamn do I have a story for you.

>Have a group.
>One of our members is a girl who was raped
>The fucker responsible killed himself before trial
>She's shaken up about it, but recovering.
>We don't discuss rape in games for her sake.
>New guy comes in, friend of DM's.
>Makes a barbarian
>Not five minutes in has his barbarian try to rape her ranger
>She kills him
>"Whoa, what the hell? I thought you'd be used to it."

The DM literally dragged him out of the chair and threw him out the door. It was a while before she wanted to play with us again. She's recovered from that, but goddamn.

I'm not for sjws or feminazis, but Jesus fucking Christ, have some standards.

>>46131294
Ah, fair enough.
I didn’t pay close enough attention because the way I read it made for an easy cheap joke to counter balance all my relationship rhetoric.
My bad.

>>46131353
As long as I'm not homeless and can afford decent internet, I'm doing enough right by me.

>>46131384

Funny

>>46131296
Unsurprising, since it's largely only homosexual couples who can afford 40k armies anymore.

>>46131390
then the bar you set is lower than what functioning, emotionally healthy humans find acceptable.

until you change that, nothing else will.
if that existence is amenable to you, so be it.

>>46131384
If that actually happened, I'm sorry for her, and the guy who played barbarian is despicable.

>>46131381
Eeeh, OSR doesn't really do it for us. He loves old modules though, and he's really into LoTFP right now. Death Frost Doom looks pretty neat, and I'm always down to learn a new system.

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>>46131384

Barbarian sounds like top lad with A+ bantz, and your GM is a tosser.

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>>46131384
>>"Whoa, what the hell? I thought you'd be used to it."
I'd have thrown him out too.

>>46131369
I'm not in any rush, no need since >>46131424
is pretty much right about my current situation.

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>>46131384
>My fucking face when
Fucking lord anon. How did the group even continue that night?

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>>46131384
Wow holy fucking shit. Fuck that guy.

This thread is way too normalfaggy, shouldn't you guys be in some party or something normalfags do on saturday nights?

>>46131488
we're posting on our phones.

>>46131436
Dungeon design is the shit senpai, we spend way too much time designing them and worldbuilding.

>>46131488
Spent the whole day measuring a park and after hanging out with a fuckbuddy I'm too exhausted to go out anymore.

>>46131495

Damn normalfag technology

>>46131495
Quit ignoring everyone.

>>46126683
I'm pretty effeminate and I'm neither narcissistic nor 'bitchy'. Masc4Masc fags tend to be just as rude and catty as any high femme twink out there.

>>46131589
This. This right here. Masc here, and I'd rather have a more effeminate guy talk to me on Grindr than 90% of the meatheads.

>>46131613
H-hi, anon... Uh, wh-what's up?

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>>46131646
Not much, watching Jojos while I assemble my Word Bearers, how about you?

>>46131589
>>46131613

Not all effeminate guys are narcissistic nor bitchy, and rude "masculine" guys can be extremely cowardly since they tend to avoid confrontation and they're not used to someone to stop their bullshit.

As a rule of a thumb, hang out with people with common courtesy and that's capable of talking things straight to your face.

>>46126907
>tfw you roleplay and your girlfriend doesn't
>tfw she asks you to teach her how because she knows it's important to you and wants to try it
>tfw she really enjoys herself and wants to keep gaming
>tfw you realize fedoras are full of shit

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>>46131714

>>46131714
never let go

>>46131681
J-just watching South Park and tr-trying to work on an upcoming K6BD game...

>>46131383
>Please. You're an idiot for trying to force a separation, as if there was some other distinction between two best friends and two homosexual lovers.
The fact is, like anon pointed out, that there is a distinction for lovers in a serious relationship.
And it has nothing to do with sex. Sex takes up a relatively small amount of time. most days
Two people in a serious relationship tend to spend more time together than two buddies who’ve known each other for twenty years.

There are relationships that are forged in situations that will never have an equal.
A veteran has said that his friends were in the war with him and everyone else is just acquaintances. That vet’s wife is the only reason he’s still alive and the two know each other better than anyone else.
But she wasn’t in the war with him.
But he wouldn’t say the stupid shit you are slinging because he knows not everyone’s situation is the same.
Not everyone’s closest relationships are forged by battle.
Some are forged by overcoming hatred and prejudice together.
Some are forged by other trauma.
Some are forged by picnics and noodle salad. Nobody in this thread, but some people. That’s their bond, noodle salad.

If you and your buddies spoon each other at night while discussing every little thing, wake up in the morning, go through your daily routines together, clean each other’s dirty laundry, cry in front of each other, spend lazy afternoons together, mourn together, share intimate details that you’ve never shared with anyone else, have overcome emotional issues together, know who the other is talking to on the phone to simply by body language, and in general do absolutely ever other thing that two lovers do except insert your penises into each other, then you might have a point.
But no, you are just an idiot who is wrong on the internet, is irrationally angry at a homosexual person they’ve never met, & will now be ignored by this heterosexual, married man.

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>>46131714

>>46122275
The GM breaking up with his girlfriend, who was a player in the group.
They were together a few years and she was starting to talk marriage. He was just dating her because he was antisocial and she was willing to date him.

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>>46131795
K6BD? That is some top tier taste you've got there anon.

>>46131853
>apocalypse world
>top tier
choose only one

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>If you and your buddies spoon each other at night while discussing every little thing, wake up in the morning, go through your daily routines together, clean each other’s dirty laundry, cry in front of each other, spend lazy afternoons together, mourn together, share intimate details that you’ve never shared with anyone else, have overcome emotional issues together, know who the other is talking to on the phone to simply by body language, and in general do absolutely ever other thing that two lovers do
>mfw
I'm the gay anon up top, and nothing I've ever posted has described my relationship that well. Thank you.

>>46131806
>clean each other’s dirty laundry, cry in front of each other, spend lazy afternoons together, mourn together, share intimate details that you’ve never shared with anyone else, have overcome emotional issues together
I'm not the anon you're replying to but my friendships have involved all of the above. Anyone who I don't feel this comfortable around, I consider an acquaintance, not a true friend.

>>46131925
>Not spooning your bros at night

>>46131966
What I'm saying is that friendship, at least for me, requires intimate trust both ways, and anything less I consider to be acquaintance, not friendship.

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>>46132025
I know anon, I'm just busting your chops

>>46131613
In my experience, 90% of my conversations with effeminate guys in grindr can be summarized as:

>"Hey"
>"Hello"
>"How are you?"
>"Doing fine, and you?"
>"Can you send me your nudes?"

I'm always open for conversation, but effeminate guys only want to see my dick, or they'd lure me into a conversation and ask me to have sex at least 3 times after I've already told them that I wasn't interested.

I don't know if this is related to me living in a shithole or what, but effeminate homosexuals feel entitled to get my pictures after I answered a single message of them. Meatheads, once in a conversation, can be more interesting since they're not sex starved as some other guys and are capable of holding a conversation, but there's still a huge portion of dicks that think that they're better than you.

>>46126785
>A girlfriend isn't like a best friend, it's like a little girl you're awkwardly friends with but can fuck without being called a pedo.
That's one of the more unique analogies I've seen in my time on 4chan.

>>46122348
That's insanity to the highest degree

>>46127114
>You forget how probability works.

So, uh, do you court girls by throwing a dart and holding up 's boom box in front of the window of whoever it hits?

Dating isn't "roll the dice, see what waifu you get." Most people specifically to looking for somebody who shares their interests.

Most people who know what they're doing, anyways. I guess there are a lot of people who date because "lol she's hot"

>>46132597

I see you never rolled on the random girlfriend table

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>>46132597
I'm just gonna throw this out here, and this is just, like, my opinion, man.

If you're looking for someone to have sex with and sometimes interact with, that's not really a girl/boyfriend.
That's a fuckbuddy.

A girl/boyfriend is someone that you get along with, have fun with, laugh, cry, try, and fail with. They're the one that you can tell anything to, and they'll accept you as the person you are.
Relationships are a two-way street. Lotsa people on here seem to be looking for a hookup, not a committment. Even more seem to have gotten burned by one of these types looking for the other, and that's too bad.

I hope all of you find someone to be with. It really does change your life.
Three months now. I haven't lost my chance at wizard powers yet, but we're taking it slow and toeing our way into deeper waters.

>>46129873
If you choose to wrestle with bears, and they eat you, it's your own fucking fault.

>>46131922
>Know that feel
I ain't even gay, just lucky.

>>46132740
I can't tell you how hard I rolled my eyes at this.
Then I realized how much of a sap I am because I legitimately want all of that cute shit. I just don't want to go all in and have someone bail on me for another dude.

>>46132856
It sounds cliché as fuck, but you'll know.
I'm not the smartest guy around, or most handsome, or strongest or anything.
Literally all you have to do is be yourself, and people who want to be with you will recognize that. It's easy to tell when someone is faking it.
If you're an unlikeable person, well, there's always time to change. You can be anything, or anyone you want to if you set your heart on changing your bad habits to good ones.

Be the best you can be, anon. I believe in you!

>>46132958

I want to be a sleazy car salesman that wears hawaiian shirts and golden chains

>>46132958
Thing is, I have more than plenty of friends, loyal and patient enough to even put up with my little period where I was literally bumming off them. Felt like shit, glad that time is over, but I just don't have whatever it is that pushes me from "okay guy" into dating material. I'm like practice, or settlement tier. Not someone who gets to share their life with someone.

>>46133030
Anon, I firmly believe that everyone has someone. Sometimes they don't find each other in time, that's all.

Go to places where you have hobbies, and make yourself available there. Whatever you like, find a local, smallish place where you get to know everyone.
To use Magic as an example, I know several people who've gotten together theough our LGS, just from sharing a hobby and learning more about each other. There's no magic pill that makes you desirable. You just have to find your complement.

>>46133112
Shit, I feel sorry for my someone.

>>46133112
Thanks for that, but I didn't mean it in a magic pill sort of way. People generally crave interest and excitement and I don't really provide much of that. I'm just kind of a blah in that department.

Also a bit of this >>46133176
if it's true.

>>46122348
Can I get some porn like this? Like with cute, pretty goth femboys using a hot girl as their fuck toy

>>46133112

Are you trying to say that that you're just the half of something and that you need to find someone to achieve happiness?

>>46125107
Wth

>>46126785
that is fucking weird but strangely accurate for my current situation

>>46122348
>just how Descartes proved that something can't exist without thinking it does

This bothered most about this entire story.

>>46124478
It's just as much the man's fault, he chose to be a bitch's bitch.

>>46124687
People do want to talk about their nice, stable relationships, because they know you don't have one and people are assholes.

>>46124768
I'll play if it's text based. Voices break my immersion.

>>46122275
Well, this is the most awkward thing that's happened recently. It's the first thing that comes to mind, though I know I've witnessed much worse.

>Have a decent group of players
>Meet up once a week online for a D&D campaign
>These are hand selected players that I've gathered over the years
>Everyone has their own weaknesses
>My friend T's weakness is that he CANNOT for the life of him speak in-character
>That's alright, not a big deal. Most of the time he plays strong silent types
>Last week, they're going through a dungeon, they come across a room with two Amazonian guardswomen
>The guards don't attack them outright, and are just protecting a specific vault. As long as the players don't go for the vault, they're fine
>The party all takes this time to talk to the guards (You know, this is a rare opportunity to speak with possible enemies in a dungeon.)
>They ask some basic questions like, "What is this place? Why are you here? Who do you serve?"
>Everything goes smoothly until T gets in his head that these Amazons should be cohorts. "I ask them if they want to follow us!"
>Me: Why would they want to follow you?
>T: I say, "You could follow us, and leave this room, and be free."
>Me: T, they are specifically guarding this one room. Why would they follow you?
>T: I don't know. I tell them, "We could show you what the world is like outside this room."
>Me: They aren't stuck in this room, you can assume they're just on guard duty, at the moment. They give you quizzical looks, as if they are pondering what you're getting at.
>THIS GOES ON FOR 10-20 MINUTES. I try to move things along, but he is determined. But eventually, he drops it.
>Towards the end of the adventure, they meet the villain that they have been pursuing through the dungeon.
>They have him cornered, and they start negotiating.
>Everyone is asking the villain about his evil plan, slowly they start unraveling the events of the adventure.
>(cont'd)

>>46134138
>Important plot points are being discovered.
>The party is set on the trail of their next adventure, some of them are taking notes
>They are even considering letting the villain go, because his resources have been diminished, and both sides are looking to avoid a fight.
>T, who has been silent this whole time suddenly speaks up,
>T: If you give us the Amazons upstairs, we will let you go
>Everyone else is immediately frustrated with him
>Me: He looks at you and laughs.
>T: Well, I ask him in a way that sounds smart. (Rolls a diplomacy check.)
>Me: T, you wouldn't have a diplomacy score high enough, buddy. What the hell are you trying to do, anyway?
>This continues for another ten minutes while I wrap things up with the rest of the party.

God damn... Some players can be fucking retarded sometimes.

Y'know, it's threads like this that give me hope, because at least I'm not as autistic as all of you sad fucks.

>>46127136
Ask him to call you by your real name and then kiss him on the mouth

>>46128190
>never use a condom.
You seem to be not just any type of problem, but a 2012 alpha male obsessed /b/tard problem.

>>46128190
You sound like a fuckin' retard.
Like, every single statement makes you seem like a bigger loser than the last.

>"Play video games while on the phone"?
>"Tell them silly little shit in your games"?
I highly doubt you're 23, I'm almost completely certain you're still in highschool.
And I know you've not had your peepee in 18 people.

>Never use a condom
>smoke dank
>have a plan to kill her
Grow the fuck up, kid. The world's gonna chew your soft ass up.

>>46131384
Fucking Aussies man

>>46132156
My female friends have told me this is exactly what happens on Tinder as well

>>46127774

okay but where is the fist fight?

>>46133228
>having shit porn tastes
The only thing you should fap to is the evil tickle witch.

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>>46134903

>>46128569
You really shouldn't be giving advice. Besides the fact that you are probably just lying outright, even if we presume you're telling the truth, that's a recipe for a ton of meaningless flings, which is the last thing a robot needs (or will ever get, for that matter).

The main issue is that robots don't actually have much experience interacting with actual girls, so their image of women is based on their female relatives, the girls that stood out to them in school (typically the pretty and shallow ones, I imagine), and shit other robots say, along with horror stories of the one in 10,000 cases where a shit bag who is also a woman plays somebody like a bitch.

They ignore decent and good women, because they either don't interact with them, or don't acknowledge them, since they're not out of the ordinary. Instead, they focus on what's flashy and memorable, which is typically cliches that don't actually exist (commonly, I'm sure there's at least one walking cliche out there) and loud, obnoxious assholes.

This fantasy scenario of "if I meet a girl, it's going to end up with me divorced and get having half my money" is fabricated from horror stories, excuses making (no-no, I don't WANT a girlfriend, because this), and negative reinforcement from other robots, with a dash of sour grapes.

Abandon it and be realistic.

>>46130806
>cute fallacy

Disregarding the fact that they weren't actually saying that, can you point out what the actual fallacy was, or after you just using fallacy as a buzzword to say "ur rong"

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>>46127743

>>46134911
TICKLE ON, TICKLE WITCH

>>46129270
Yes!

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>Be femanon
>Playing female character in evil-aligned game
>Get captured by the good guys and interrogated
>Refuse to talk
>LG captors send in a perverted moleman to molest me
>What the actual fuck
>GM makes big show of describing how I'm tied up and roving mole hands
>Call him out on it
>He laughs and says to just play along
>mfw

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>>46135190
>Mfw

>>46135190
How direct were you? If yoi just said it was weird, he might have misinterpreted it.
If you said it was creepy, obvious that it was his fetish, and said you'd leave if it kept happening (following through if necessary), before having your character try to bite the mole's hand off, then they're beyond hope.

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>>46135190

gf had a similar experience with her old playgroup

>group playing the dark eye (das schwarze auge)
>gf plays witch
>gf uses standard witch spell that is basically a love potion to another character where you spend the night with him and drain him of his regeneration throws while he cannot remember it afterwards.
>GM ends the game at this point
>next time GM brings out a multipage supplementary for having magical sex
>mfw GM makes the party play magical sex even though the other party can't even remember it afterwards:
>mfw gf called it a little weird

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>dating one of the girls in the group
>she sits on my lap during the sessions
>we whisper cute shit into the other's ear, little kisses and eskimo kisses
>DM thinks it's the cutest thing
The rest of the group gets visibly upset at this

>>46136207
i hate public displays of affection like that, not too sure why it just always irks me. especially at a gaming table, mainly because it is distracting

>>46136207
Pic not related. That shit ain't normal.

>>46136207
out of curiousity, what does the rest of the group consist of?

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When I was younger, I was a girly little bishonen kpop star wannabe.
Anyway, because of this, one of the landwhales at our local store started developing a crush. I didn't have any problem with that, she was friendly enough at first and I let her down lightly when I saw she was making advances.

She eventually starts getting really obsessive and starts leaving her fanfiction shit in my backpack. Literally pages and pages of her OCs assfucking me in various and exciting scenarios.

Eventually she stopped going to the store, but oh man, those 5 months where I was bringing home like 3 gay fan fiction stories home a month.
They were too funny to tell her to stop.
Her deviantart is still active, so I'm sure she's fine.

>>46136263
You know what you've gotta do anon.

>>46136235
>friend from highschool, typical fedora
>friend from highschool, typical black nerd
>friend from college, army guy
>friend from college, DM, fujo pretending to be a normal girl

>>46136593
Are they all single?

>>46125945
Blatantly not true unless you enjoy bitching and whining and quarrelling with your best friends.

>>46136612
Army guy is married, the rest are single

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>>46131384
>"Whoa, what the hell? I thought you'd be used to it."

>>46128190
>Never use a condom
>smoke dank.

your advice is whack.

>>46130660
>I WAS OPPRESSED

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>>46131384
>>"Whoa, what the hell? I thought you'd be used to it."
What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?! What the actual fuck! Yeah I foresaw her getting raped a mile ahead, but I didn't expect nothing like that comment!

>>46123166

I play with a Lawyer frequently.

>mfw he sucks at complex game rules

>>46127774
>Be me
oh good, I thought you were going to be someone else for a second

>>46128190
You've... never actually had sex, have you?

>>46134149
C'mon pal, let the poor guy get his amazons!

>>46132958
>>46133112

>be yourself
>you can be anything or anyone you want to
>all you have to do is try
>there's an order to the universe and everyone has someone out there

I'm not sure if you've been incredibly lucky, or incredibly naive, or have never had to deal with incredibly dysfunctional people

>>46138944
Next you are going to be telling me people lie on the internet about their sexual experiences!

>>46137180
Actually, the worst of it was that I found my mom over dosed on methadone, and I found her body on the couch at 6.

>>46139463
I don't think there is a tailor made perfect mate for anyone, but there are lots of compatible ones. No one is perfect and a lot of relationships hit a snag when suddenly their "perfect" mate does something that does not fit in that perfect fantasy.

>>46128694
Those would be some stinky cookies

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>Went over to the house of vice president of local college D&D club. Just 5 of us including me and VP's wife who GM'd for the session
>Group takes a break from the session halfway through to shoot the shit and because the room we play in is cramped and cluttered, agitating two of our friends who have varying degrees of claustrophobia
>Casual discussion of fetishes comes about when friend takes out his whip that he brings to Renaissance faires, VP's wife reveals she's dominant to a degree at some point in the discussion.
>Some of the group tries to dig for my fetishes since I'm the only confirmed virgin in the group, though they don't get anything of value out of me since I only said that I "write stuff out." Avid user of F-List.

Outside of that, pretty cool group. I didn't mind the subject matter, but I'm afraid of the potential silent judgement since they're all basically normies and I don't think any of them visit 4chan.

pic loosely related

>>46134925

See, my issue is just failing to see the point in trying to "catch up" when I'm already so far behind in the relationship scene. I've been a sperg all of High School and most of college, and the time I finally started feeling vaguely normal I was moving back in with the parents and working a shitty job.

I'm 25 years old and a virgin. Yes I've been working out and getting my life together, but all the gains in the world still haven't made women look at me with interest.

But you know what? I'm fine with that, I understand it's a situation where I need to make the first move because, as a man, that's my responsibility. But how are you supposed to make the first move when most women are disgusted with you? I've had Tinder for about a year now and the only people who have shown the *slightest* interest in me were ugly, shallow landwhales, desperate single mothers, and thirty somethings who realize they need to settle before their looks finally give out. It makes me realize the problem is I'm clearly broken on a fundamental level.

Which has made me realize something; why should I change? Why should I go through the agony of changing my routine, my personality and my way of perceiving things when it will, at best, land me some woman interested in settling after a lifetime of fun when it would be the first relationship I've ever really been in?

It's irrational, but humans have never been rational; I'm too old to play the field and too bitter to just settle with someone who's getting off the cock carousel.

>>46122348

... I'm almost positive that's for real because that sounds exactly like a chick I used to bang and her BF at the time this was posted..

>>46140328
Even that's still a simplistic and almost insulting view-relationships don't just hit snags because someone has a perfect fantasy that their partner doesn't fit. Compatible people can fight tooth and nail for a relationship recognizing each other's flaws and still have to walk away.

>>46140228

Last night I lied to your mom when I was fucking her and 17 other sluts with my 23 inch dick and massive balls lmao nerd

>>46127305
>that one guy with the glasses askew
Who let Zack into this party

>>46125071
>>46125107

uhh wat. this is so weird. I have seen protective parents like hover around or supervise but to straight up require to play is so weird man. Only thing I can think of is that the sister made the mom play because she didnt want to be alone.

>>46126616
Both of them are cunts, and so is "Sanguinous." Do whatever fetish stuff you like, but don't drag unsuspecting outsiders into it and make them all uncomfortable.

>>46143870

I was in your shoes about 5 years ago. I decided I wasn't going to change unless I wanted it for my own reasons (relocating to a better job because I wanted more money and less bullshit, losing weight primarily for health reasons rather than appearance, etc). I also decided that I was going to be just as choosy with my partners as a woman was. I would date women then not call them again for minor slights, I'd end conversations with women on tindr if they failed to entertain me in less than 3 replies, you get the idea. I also decided what I wanted out of a relationships (mostly giant tits (no smaller than a DDD), high sex drive, doesn't mind if I bang other women or men, has cute friends to bring into bed for threeways, likes many of the same hobbies as I do, etc).

It took me years to find her, but I did. It does exist, you have to accept 99% of people in general are absolute shit and it's not worth it to waste time with them, pull up /d/ and yank it to some dickgirls until the urge passes.

Also, I noticed some redpill terminology there. There are truths in the whole redpill movement, but you don't want to dive in as there's a lot of poison that will ruin your chances of being happy. MGTOW are right that men do need time to persue their own ambitions and interests but sitting around bitching about women on the internet is neither an ambition nor an interest. PUA's know how to improve how you present yourself but they literally seek out the worst, most useless vapid cunts on the planet to impress. Dip your toe in the manosphere, swim around a bit, but get out before it makes your fingers pruny.

>>46132980

I 100% know women (and men!) who, if you're not a horrible, irredeemable cunt under your sleaze and Hawaiian shirts, would absolutely adore that.

>>46143870

>25
>too old to play the field

Holy *shit*. Do people actually honestly think shit like this? Also

>sincerely using Tinder
>getting shit results
>being surprised

I just can't wrap my head around the self-reinforced hatred people put themselves through. Of course the people on Tinder are shitty, it's fucking *Tinder* for christ's sake. The people who use Tinder are people like you, you idiot.

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>>46122513
Summons lolis or is a loli?
Both?

>>46130020
Got experience with that?

>>46137881
That response was a sucker-punch straight out of left field. Holy shit.

(Talking about the dude in the story, not you anon)

>>46122323
And then Slaanesh was born.

>>46127136
>Too gay for words.

>>46130020
Dont you mean a world of sith?

>>46122348
This made me feel things.

I don't know if I can be proud or not.

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>>46128313
wait..that gif...Do Tolkien elves bleach their hair?

Why are his eyebrows brown?

I DEMAND AN IN UNIVERSE EXPLANATION.

>>46148390
magic

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>>46148512

>>46126907
>>46127114
You're a sad, strange little man, and you have my pity.

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hmm, this thread is shit.

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>>46148909

It's in autosage.

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>>46149017
fuck auto sage, spidey is best. I've already been subtly fucking this thread up half way through.

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>>46149087

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>have friend willing to DM
>they're hella cool with a lot of experience
>never done any tabletop RPG before but want to so bad
>no one else gives a shit or wants to play with us
>RPG club at college is dead as shit so no networking there

I-I just want to have fun.

>>46149017
no it's not

>>46149698

Is it not 300 posts? The counter in the bottom left says it is.

>>46149722
Autosage is 310.