Your last played character vs. this guy.

Good thing my last character hated kids... and humans in general.

>>44764098
Hold person. Remove babies. Dispose of as desired. NEXT

Also in the comic they hung him

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>>44764098
>Human babies
>Not elves

Fuck yeah, free bonus kills!

>>44764098
Grab by throat, squeeze hard, hold in place while babies are removed by the rest of the party.

>>44764098
Super-intelligent Fencer.

I stab him in precisely the right spot to avoid harming the babies.

Then my terrifying giant centipede "Stand"(not really a Stand, but the closest thing I can think of to describe it) peels the babies off him while I have him in place.

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>>44764098

Last character I played is an extremely powerful psionic. Mind control the fucker, make him gently and lovingly set each child down comfortably with a bottle and a fresh diaper.

..the walk him outside, put a pistol in his hand, and make him blow his own fucking brains out. I'm going to dirty my hands with this shitbag's blood.

>>44764098
Something fragile and very precious going squish? Sounds fun!

>>44764491
*not going.

Babies are surprisingly tough. I'll shoot 'em in the face and try to catch him before he hits the ground, but worst case scenario the babies might grow up a little mentally challenged, which is a lot better than death if you ask me.

Leap at him and stab him in the face. Kidnap the surviving babies and ransom them.

>>44764098
my last character was a drug addled foreign wizard. The babies probably freak him out, causing him to panic and shoot the guy with a bolt of lightning, then wander off

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>Man is evil.
>If babies die due to falling man, falling man has killed babies, and is thus more evil.
>Only way to stop man from being evil is to kill him.

Deus Vult, motherfucker.

>>44764098
My Dark heresy techpriest would try and talk him down, hoping for one of his team mates to take the shot. His primary weapons a shotgun, so...

That being said, if the Imperium at large is at risk or the Inquisitor has given the order, its sanctioned, so go ahead

>chaotic evil Drow sorcerer
I cast Horrid Wilting.

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Probably can't beat my stealth. First, cut off the gun hand. Then, stab in face.

>>44764098
>dorf monk
Throws a handaxe at his head then uses monk speed boost to reach him before he topples

>>44764098
>perpetually yet somehow still highly functioning drunk CN brawler

Grab his shoulder to keep him standing, proceed to punch him in the face until he shoots me or is rendered unconscious, continue holding him until party removes all of the babies. Saving the woman is optional; I was only paid to get the kids back.

>>44764098
>Half-elf Ranger, worshiper of Obad-Hai
>Shoot man in head, some babies will die, but the strong/lucky ones will survive.
RULES OF NATURE!

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I find a spear.

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>>44764098
he has no compunction about killing children

>>44764098

Should be easy enough, babies don't have shit for stopping power. Light 'em up.

>>44764098
use my silk rope to hang him, then proceed to pickpoket everyone.

>>44764098
Fly above him with my jet pack, fire my hookshot through top of his skull, and hold him up like a marionette while a buddy removes babies

>>44764098
I'm a spellcaster.

Attempt to set on fire. Perils. Summon demon. Everyone dies.

>>44764098
Well, my last played character was from Black Crusade, so...

It does not end well for him or his ridiculous armor.

>>44764098
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ma80xRSu8AM

>>44764098
Rape the babies. He'll get disquested seeing all the baby rape right next to his face.
He'll remove the babies himself.

>Anima
Just go ghost-mode, go behind him and give him a lobotomy with a rapier (-30 to hit head)

>>44764098

If order =dispose
-> smash with flail
If order =save babies
-> save babies, then smash with flail
If order =no order
-> threat y/n -> smash/ignore

Playing a LN Fighter with Wis4 who is an underling of a noble and has absolute loyalty is fun. She doesn't care if she's told to burn an orphanage. She does it without a second thought. Her master is a Paladin, tho, so she would probably try to save the babbys.

>>44764098

What the hell IS this from/how was it solved?

Because this seems dumb as fuck, to put it lightly.

>180 walk away
>"by the way, you dropped something"
>throw fireball over shoulder as i walk out

>>44764098
I roll to grapple.

*roll d20+7*
*roll d20+13*

>>44766747
wow that character sucks. hope it's not in pathfinder or dnd

>>44764098
>I cast Ray of Sickness
All the babies get sick and pukes on him

I have won from sheer overwhelming no fuck given

drow poison

>>44764098
Sneak up on him, wait until he gets close to a wall, cast slow on him, run him through the eye socket with an estoc with such force that his head is impaled to the surface behind him, with the crossguard of the blade pressed up against the bridge of his nose, and his corpse is pinned in a standing position. I've pulled off a trick like this before, but it was with an orc night patrol guard wearing a large and loud magical bell around his neck that would ring if his body hit the ground.

Don't fuck with inquisitors. We have a plan for everything, and plan B is always "burn it all, fuck the collateral damage."

>>44764641
I like your style.

>>44766752
Why would I ever play something as shit as DnD/PF?
Where do you think we are?

>>44764098
>transforms to crinos
>takes the guy down while he's panicking from lunacy

>>44764098

To join the parade of characters who don't give a shit: elder Nosferatu flicks his head off, maybe bothers to catch his body before it hits the ground.

>>44764098
70 year old psyker
Cast holocaust
Done

>>44764098
Make them burn. More souls to fuel my lichdom. Woo

>>44764098
The babies are actually midget halfling commandos planted well in advance.

Immobilize him with mind control (closest term to what she does), unstrap babies, drag him out for the authorities to take over.

>>44764098
Let's say Time Hop is rather good.

>>44764098
He'd probably just walk away and let that guy do whatever it is he's doing.
hurray for the power of apathy

>"Look, just put the gun down and let the babies go, alright?"

Then I force him to roll low on his save against persuasion with divination shenanigans.

>>44764098
MY GREATSWORD WILL CUT THROUGH THEIR FLESH AS WELL.

>>44764098
Command/Dominate.

>>44764098
>Psyker with telepathy and mind control

Pretty much this >>44764491

Though rather than blowing his brains out I'd use the Spontaneous Combustion power to cook him from the inside out.

Breathe fire.

>>44764098
This depends, do the babies count for XP?
. Is joke, I kid, I kid. I'm only a level 5 swashbuckler, so I did pretty fast. Not even counting her softness for children

>>44764098

Might actually have some trouble. I'm playing a warlock in 3.5e, and I don't think I've got any powers that are hugely relevant.

I guess I'd have to try Diplomacy, see if I can talk him down. Pretty good at that.

If that didn't work I'd probably be looking at teleporting behind him *tip* with the party's Reaping Mauler, and hoping he can get enough grapple going to immobilise the guy without crushing any babies.

>>44764641
So accidentally killing something makes you evil? Paladins being retarded all over again, you'd be the cause of death through action, 0/10 see me after class

>>44764098
I roleplay a Night Lord.

The babies are a fucking bonus.

>>44764583
Except it isn't.

I shoot the RPG at the bus full of schoolchildren

>>44766898
>all those lunatic babies...

>>44764098
Jedi Consular, literally talk him down.
>"You're going to drop your gun and listen to my orders."
>"I'm going to drop my gun and listen to your orders."
Once babies are safe, either the police lay into him or he gets a three hour personal morality lesson taught to him at the point of a lightsaber.

>>44768894
Oh, and then the families of the children lay into him.
Just wanted to clarify.
Jedi are great on ironic lessons.

>>44764583
>>44767549

Shadowrun: they have augs for that. That said, my players might try to loot and fence the babies.

>>44767252
>accidentally killing something
>totally missing the point

He strap the babies around with the sole intentions of kill the babies if people shoot
hin...evil as fuck...you are the only retard here anon

>>44764098
I dunno, drain all his willpower and peel off the babies from his drooling vegetable form after? Give myself super-speed and grapple? Melt his head with a plasma gun? Attempt to mind-dominate him?

The babies would make great minions though, just have to make sure they're not inclined to betray me.

>>44769122
All but the mind domination will result in him falling down and squishing babies, or you grappling with him and squishing babies.

>>44764098
>not covering his head or arms in babies

Geez, it's like he's asking to have his skull bashed in with his own arm.

Please tell me that someone just shot the guy in the head and then catched the falling bodies.

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>>44764098
THE LIVES OF CHILDREN ARE NOTHING BEFORE THE RAGE OF THE EMPEROR! BURN THE HERETIC!!

>>44769148
The first, second and last option all end with him still standing up. Willpower at 0 means they stand in place like a zombie, grapple means I can control him and his movement, and dominating his mind would let me command him to carefully remove the babies. Considering his speed, melting his face might allow my character to catch him before he reaches the ground.

Not that he really cares about dead babies. He's a daemon, after all.

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>>44764098

I accidentally step on him, killing everyone in that building, while fighting against a giant pinwheel that shoots bolts of time condensed into a physical substance.

This gets chalked up as an instance of Moderate collateral damage, and Nerv spares me the details because telling my that I squashed a room full of infants would be unnecessarily damaging to my mental health. If I need a confidence boost, the OD might tell me that I accidentally prevented a bad guy from committing murder, which is technically accurate.

Unless I am not in the robot, in which case I NOPE the fuck out of there because jesus christ that madman has a gun.

>>44764098
My last character would throw a granate at him.

Then another one, because some babies could have survived the blast.

What the hairy dicknipples is up with all the shit spelling?

>>44769171
I believe he was hung by a Wonder Woman expy using her lasso.

Welp how useful is a Lego boba fett?

>>44764098
People always forget it's not just the baby's in this image he has a gun in somebody's face

>>44764098
Hypnotic Pattern

>>44764098
Well, my last played character had a lot in common with Rorschach so probably crossbow bolt to the face followed by a quick close (30 ft of movement in 6 seconds) and catching him before he hits the ground

>>44764137
0 personnels/10

He's gonna get shot. If he's lucky it'll kill him and we won't have to best him to death after we get the babies off.

>>44768945
>That said, my players might try to loot and fence the babies.

That post just made my morning. I needed a good laugh, thanks.

>>44764098
>Shadowrun Manipulation/Illusion mage
Oh, I am going to enjoy this.

>>44764098
My last character is an Anima Technician with elemental summons. He can just chop the guy's head off from a distance and have a Sylph catch his body.

>>44764098
Summon a ghost to possess him. Gently remove Babbys.

>>44764098
Khorne cares not from where the blood flows, only that it does.

>>44764098
I inadvertently played as a homicidal maniac because all of my spells were ridiculous AoE attacks.

This probably wouldn't end well.

>>44764098
The rogue that was pissed off when the barbarian killed the BBEG with a grimoire? He would stab the guy WITH the babies.

But no, seriously, his neck has no babies. As long as i can neckstab him from a hiding place, all is good.

Vaporize him with a holy laser beam, then heal any babies who fell.

My 300lb Crab Trucker specialised in fighting. He doesn't know what humans are because there are none in his setting (he probably thinks humans reproduce by budding) His chitinous shell will probably provide some resistance to small arms fire.

He tears the enemy limb from limb with his claws.

Grab him by the throat, lift him up, then wait for the rest of his team to remove the babies, then choke slam him hard enough to kill him. My character is a robot so he can hold the guy until his batteries die.

>>44764098
My last character was a super"hero" who's power was detonating babies. This is what his entire career has been leading up to. this is his raison d'être.

Shoot him in the face and catch him before he falls.

PhysAd from shadowrun with 4d6+13 imitative

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>>44764098
>Evil warlock last game

Well, there is gonna be less babies in the world.

>>44764098
Haven't played in a while, so my three most memorable characters:

NG Swordsman would probably attempt to spear his skull to the wall/ceiling and then use his 18 STR to hold the guy up while detaching babbies.

LE Mage wouldn't care, so let's pretend there is some valid reason he needs the guy stopped and the babies alive. Like anon said, "Hold Person" would work, but I can't recall if my mage had that spell.
Honestly, it would be his style to firebolt the guy's head off, then heal/raise any babies damaged by his falling body.

CE Blackguard would probably call dibs on the baby on the left shin. "He looks tasty!"
Then, after being chastised into trying to do it right, he would cleave the top half of the guy's head off only to remember why that was a bad idea after the babies got squished.
Then, he'd rationalize that it was the fault of whoever had him deal with it in the first place.

My current character would have to let him go...for now.

That's what I get for making a fat Bothan

>>44764098
>Shadowrun Raven Shaman

Welcome to Control Thoughts, her favorite spell.

>>44764098
Grey Court Vampire in Fate. Dominate, remove babies, and leave him a vegetable.

>>44764098
Where'd he get so many goddamn babies

And my Fighter who used to be a barkeep would try to talk him out of it and then kick his ass

>>44764098
>autistic inquisitor
well, they are all assbabbies anyway.

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> Hostage Situation
> Am spiritually child of Osiris, biologically child of Isis.
> Have punched titans to death
> I can kill him by flicking him with my pinkie

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>>44764098
Kill everything.
Tip fedora on the way out.

>>44764098
Last character I played was a ruthless drider pirate.
Would probably just stab through throat.
Babies better hope they're on the safe side

>nWod mortal bank robber

"Okay, take the fucking money! Last time I'm working with crazies."

>>44772384
So did he just like throw babies at his enemies or what

IC? Probably try to intimidate him into giving himself up, and throwing a Kylo Ren fit of rage directed at the nearest unattended wall/table/whatever with Thunderous Smite.
OOC? She could probably just use Command to get him to surrender.

>>44764098
The baby on his right knee looks like a villain. I zap it.

>>44764098
Cut to his hand.

Thrust threw his throat right into the drywall. Lift pommel to keep body raised.

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>>44764098

>>44764219
This
Elf master race

Levitate + called shot

>>44764144
You are meant to save the babies, not dispose of them.

At least 12 people all in physical contact with each other?

I cast Of a Kind, Of a Form and make a really cool flesh golem.

>>44764098
I use Reach to cast Age Other on the babies.

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:::::o)

>>44764098
Morally conflicted vampire from WOD

So try to bargin with, Dominate when no other choice, get him to put down the babies. then kill him.
Send the children to an orphanage because he'd feel horrible about abandoning them.
For some hed probably still feel guilty about it.

>>44764098
Babies get turned into rabid wolverines for a minute. Have fun with those strapped to you.

>>44767564
You could've shot the tunnel.

https://youtu.be/zRNg_mXssUY?t=1m2s

>>44765115
Criminal Scum falls, babies squished.

Sweet, baby zombies.

>>44775845
But the spear ends up lodged in the wall, holding up the dead criminal

>>44775955
rest of the body outweights head+spear, does not stay attached.

>>44775955
Babies on his back smack wall, potential squish damage.

>>44764098
Try and bulshit was him long enough for someone with an actual plan to do something. If the guy who gets him kills the babies I can always blame that guy. If he gets away then I can always get him later, he can't wear baby armor forever, that shit stinks.

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>>44764098
>my last played character's face when he's a Chronomancer
>cast Time Freeze on criminal scum, recast if necessary
>carefully unstrap each baby and put them away safely
>tell the hostage to GTFO or at least help him with the babies
>Chronomancer wins

>>44764098
Squashed babies? You field!
I wanted undamaged baby skeletons!
Let us deal!

>>44764098
20 cha bard for epic campaign, i just talk him out of such a horrible position

>>44764098
>Explorator
The Flesh is WEAK!
Althernatively disarm then standing grapple plus medicae mechadendrite yields intact specimens for juvenat treatments

>>44764098
>Gragnar the Barbarian
>Half-Orc, Half man
>All monster
>always rolled 17+
>didn't give a single solitary fuck
Babies? eh whatever, he's going down

>>44764098
I teleport behind him.

>>44769035
Did you read the original post? Apparently the baby death can be blamed on the man for a paladins sloppy work

Think Mantis from FTL. Except psychic as well. Babies are simply additional flavouring. Being deadly serious here.

>>44764098
Tyrus the Redblade asks him what the fuck he's thinking, trying to make someone known for manslaughter hesitate with that. He commends him for creativity, however.

>>44764098
Ninja.
Steal the babies, replace them with dolls.
Raise them to be new generation of my currently all dead and/or banished to another dimension clan.
Check newspaper occasionally to find out if anyone ever did anything about that guy he stole the babies from.

>>44772384
That was the funniest thing I've read today.
thank you.

I'm something of a forever DM and my last character wouldn't be a very interesting story, as he's an Earth Federation Space Forces pilot whose main strengths are that he's a colossal nerd and a very good pilot, so have this instead.

My last character that my players wanted to see again was a housecat. A damn fast one.

He drops on the guy's face and starts clawing. Hostage guy forgets what he's doing, flails around, screaming, probably whiffs his shots in the chaos and tries not to throw himself around like he plans for fear of fucking himself up too badly. Lets himself down more gently, you get a bunch of shaken up babies but no actual squishes.

>>44775454
Why even bother bargaining before Dominating? This shitbag doesn't deserve to actually get any benefits out of using babies as leverage.

>>44775972
Necks are pretty strongly disposed to stay attached to their heads.

Hanged corpses don't just immediately, spontaneously decapitate because the weight's being held up by the head instead of the legs.

>>44764098
Last character was an enchantress.
>Dominate Person
>Remove babby armor
>An hero

>>44764098
Where the fuck did this guy get that many babies?

>>44764098
My last character was in a villain campaign so I'm pretty sure my character would just take the shot. The only question is whether or not one of the other party members would beat them to it.

>>44764098

babbies are resilient, just pop im in the head

>>44778144

actually there have been instances in the past with overweight persons have their head seperate from the body during hanging, but that was prolly done with garrote wire

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>>44764098
Where did this fuckstick get a baby-carrying harness like this? What, you could engineer a 12-child holding device but you couldn't just put on a bulletproof vest and a gas mask?

>>44768945
Kek. Your players are doing it right.

>>44764098
>S-s-stop, you can't hurt m
>ZA WARUDO
>MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA

Except it's laser beams instead of knives/punches

>>44764098
If she's fighting him inside the ship, and he somehow ended up getting past the hundreds of security personal and automated defence systems, she has a sidearm that fires hard light constructs and only when pointed at the recognised target.
Photons move at, or very close to, C. Good luck dodging that.

The remaining issue is getting to his corpse before he falls and crushes any babies.

Away from the ship, her gun loses it's IFF ability and she's just a second redundent systems mechanics officer anyway. It wouldn't be her place to take him on. she'd be hiding till the combat personal took care of him.
Unless she was cornered.
Then she'll just have to dig a few baby graves aswell.

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>>44764098
My current character is basically pic related, only with better firearm dodging skills. Note - that while this fool has babies strapped all over his torso and legs, his arms have nothing but his sleeves.

The scimitar whirls, and the villain is disarmed, literally.

>>44766465
The precious, precious babies are a bonus at that point

Heat Metal on his gun.

Leave.

This is the third paladin you have pulled this on Dan, you meme spouting bastard.

Taking my beer, dice and the other three players and going to have a better game somewhere else.

>>44782299

Congrats on winning the gayest post in this thread award, the academy can't wait to see what you will come up with next

>>44783925
>the academy can't wait to see what you will come up with next
I find that statement incredibly entertaining and I don't know why.

>>44764098

Witch using Ritual Path Magic

I would reach into my coat and pull out a charm retroactively made for the occasion (Using my Gizmo advantage, or quick-n-dirty charm rules), the chances of my 100~ energy spell failing with my luck up is next to zero.

There's infinite possibilities of spells I can use, a huge number of them don't have any real way to resist (like turning the children and woman into lead or anacondas momentarily without harming them. Changing how the gravity works around the villain so that his bullets and the force he generates to harm the children are weaker than the blows from a feather etc.


If lacking even basic equipment and absolutely no reparation my character would let him kill him outright with a low level cantrip.

The woman would be shot and a lot of children would be injured but they wouldn't die.

My witch would then sacrifice the babies to any willing entity ( WORTH A LOOOOOOOOT of magic energy ) and use that energy to reach into another dimension and steal the same slightly altered children and replace them.

>>44784157
gurps is the best

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>>44764219
>>44774091