One thing guaranteed to happen in any game that goes on long enough

>>44348605
>>Fantasy Game: Cleric/Priest type character eventually gains a pope hat.

Going on 7 years with an on/off game. The Cleric has yet to even mention a pope hat. When should I be expecting it to appear? Is there an expected delivery date? Please let me know.

>>44348690

It's a subcategory of "silly hats", which are an incredibly important part of the religious experience. Your particular cleric's denomination might use alternative headgear as his tuning fork to the divine.

>someone cuts off one of their own limbs with a vorpal sword.
>Reference is made to the SS Portal Squad.

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>Fighter/Barbarian gets a castle with an army so that they can feel better about their class choices

>Everyone dies in some unforgiving unknown part of the world, surrounded not by loved ones but the bodies of monsters and allies.

>>44348605
The villains are heroes who lived too long.

Or maybe that's just the games I run.

>>44348805
Not since 1e, Anon. Not since 1e...

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>>44348853
>Leadership
>Cohorts
>Kingmaker scenario
>Homebrews

>>44348690

When he stops acting like a fucking chump and become someone noteworthy in his God/s's (Or whatever) eyes.

>>44348739

If you don't channel the holy spirit through a silly hat, then how can you?

>>44348690
>Going on 7 years with an on/off game. The Cleric has yet to even mention a pope hat.
What a heathen.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wUM8kHGPzfM

>>44348853
2e did it as well.

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>Someone tries to fuck a succubus
>Someone tries to waifu a succubus
>Someone tries to redeem a succubus

and unrelated to my image
>Monty Python References

>>44348690
I think he should see a Doctor then, a Cleric going that long without a Pope Hat must have a condition.

>>44348605
>An old enemy is revived or turns out to not be dead, becomes unconventional ally. May resume shitty shenanigans if found a boring companion.
>Old Village party rolled through shows some signs of improvement if they did a damn thing to help them.
>Your Party's Goblin will have passed away and needed a replacement, usually a direct descendant.

>>44348605
>people stop coming and the game ends
Every time.

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The gm resorts to tentacle mobsters
Someone says "roiling", "basically", or "standard army issue"
Someone buys the biggest gun available, and the either buys or invents explosive rounds for said rifle
The party hacker becomes invalidated by having no backup shtick
The party merchandise "rolls to intimidate" someone who doesn't require intimidating to cooperate
Someone gets possessed

>>44348605
> The classic scenario with the dragon and the hoard (and possibly younger dragons being avenged by older dragons) happens
> The party munchkin gets bored with his character because it's already made, so he makes another one
> The DM gets bored or burnt out
> The players go through the most extreme efforts to save the life of some kind of pet / comic relief npc / cute thing with no in-character justification whatsoever

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>>44348605
The story reaches it's climax; leaving all players satisfied.

Miter

>>44353992
>tentacle mobsters
Closest thing I can think of is the Amoeba Boys gang.

>>44354748
Good joke man, good joke.

>>44357606
Everybody laughs.

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>>44357682
lol, yeah, so funny. I wonder who this happens to for real, thought. Never happened to me.

>>44357446
Mitre

>>44348605
Anything is guaranteed to happen if a game goes on long enough.

Infinite time = infinite possibilities.

>>44348605
>Cleric who took a level in Ranger
>Heals by shooting his party members with an bolt to the ass
>Still wears a pope hat and is surrounded by his Swiss hirelings who reload his crossbows

>>44357682
Curtains.

>>44348605

Considering our cleric wields a flaming greatsword, plate armour and is the fallen archangel of hope striving to regain his divinity, I severly doubt he will be wearing silly hats.

>the DM kills your character's parents to get you involved in the plot
>afterwards, the DM kills your character's grandparents to get you involved in the plot
>afterwards, the DM kills your character's love interest to get you involved in the plot
>afterwards, the DM kills your character's children to get you involved in the plot
>eventually none of the players have any family whatsoever

>>44351826
I do

None of the games I've been in have really done much with demons or beings from other planes aside from one fire elemental. It's honestly rather disappointing to fight a bunch of wolves and other mundane things knowing there's a lot more interesting shit out there.

Part of what got me so excited for my first game of 3.5e was flipping through the monster manual. There were plants with hands, horrifying acid-spitting things, classics like the manticore and the sphinx, and all sorts of demons and celestials that could make fun foes or allies. But the most we fought were one of those dungeon crawlers - a bit too low fantasy for my taste.

That one line of throwaway expository dialogue becomes vital to the main story, entirely at the players insistence.
>Well yeah, I mean we definitely need the Pirate Lords of Bartona on our side. For this inland battle.

>>44348850
And your players like that?

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>>44348605
>the paladin falls

I really hope you don't do this in your games, anons.

>>44362826
My paladin fell for a good reason. It's like he wanted to fall.

>>44362310
>tfw I played a character who has 46 names and listed relatives
Let him try and kill them all, some of them aren't even on this plane.

>>44362917
monstergirl waifu?

>>44362960
The situation was as follows. The party were inside a castle that had been turned on it's side. Within they found a homunculi naked making then destroying a box over and over. It attacked them because it was mad.

They later found a barrier, beyond which was an entire homunculi village. They knew in character someone had gone through here previously, the person they were following. The party's first reaction to the village (they could see homunculi in clothing working together and just you know... being villagers) was to burn the entire thing to the ground. Despite the fact these homunculi do not appear mad and evidence pointed to them not being mad.

Now, this in and of itself wouldn't had been enough, but it gets worse. They used a barrel of oil they had to make oil bombs, and burned the village. A few homunculi rose up to defend but were cut down. A few begged for their lives, and the Paladin PERSONALLY executed them, and the party just kept chucking the oil as the village scattered and ran.

The paladin not only condoned slaughtering a village of innocents, he directly killed innocents begging for their lives.

>The party spellcaster lords their class superiority over their meatshields and get killed when their meatshield stops blocking for them.

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>>44362917
>this is what I was wearing when I fell
Tell me I was asking for it

>Shadowrun: the hacker/decker backstabs the party while on the job

Every time so far.

>someone fucks a dragon

>>44357793
My regular IRL group ran a campaign for like three years straight and we actually arrived at a point where we were satisfied and the campaign was declared "over."

>>44364417
Generally only shitters like being hackers in SR. The only time the hacker didn't backstab the party out of every game where hackers were present, it was because the Face killed him first before he could sell them out to the Yakuza.

>>44363018
>Implying Homunculi are people
>Implying that their slaughter wasn't akin to scraping a robot.

>>44368478
Depends on your setting. Those homunculi, while artificial, could become the basis for a new playable species if certain conditions were met (like a new god adopting them as his/her chosen people).

>>44362255
Well no wonder he fell; he needs to hat it up if he wants that divinity back.

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>a lesbian becomes involved in the story

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>the vizier betrays his king

>>44364417
>>44365832
I'm pretty sure that's because the backstabber keeps playing the hacker, not because playing a hacker magically makes you a backstabber.

>>44369285
That's what viziers exist to do, it's in the job description.

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One of my DM's female DMPCs will attempt to get into the pants of my female character despite no interest shown on the part of my character at all

>>44370190
So rebuke them. If it happens often enough, it's perfectly IC to get mad at them.