What's the worst backstory you've ever seen?

I could list off a few great "ORIGINULL DONUT STEEL" god-characters... but lets try and go for something a little harder and see if I can come up with the worst "serious", "not-teenager" backstory I've heard.

Hmm... I had in a game once a Magus (it's the sword+magic class in Pathfinder) who was like half-tiefling who claimed their character was found and raised by a barbarian tribe and taught how to fight by them (despite being a non-human abomination) but also quickly became their best fighter because their demonic blood gave them fire magic that they self-taught themselves to incorporate into their swordplay... yeah. There was also something in there about how the character boned her master as soon as she was old enough in order to learn SUPER SECRET FORBIDDEN TECHNIQUES.

>>43684918
The one that gets almost no development or doesn't affect the character at all.

Like the one in Fallout 4.

"I need to find my son. Jut let me build a shitton of buildings, raid some prewar caches, exterminate 999 raiders, and join a faction I don't care about".

>>43684995
Also, not to be "that guy" and be like "Hurr, women can't fight", but it's also worth noting that this was a pretty primitive barbarian tribe where only the men were warriors... you know, except for the snowflake half-demon girl...

>>43684995
>found and raised by a barbarian tribe and taught how to fight by them (despite being a non-human abomination)
How is that so weird? They are barbarians, man. Maybe their spirit animal had horns and they saw a horned infant as a good omen. If hindus can see a child with too many limbs as a sign from gods, barbarians can take in a tiefling child.

>>43685012
FUCKING BETHESDA

WAS IT SO HARD TO GET A NV STYLE STORYLINE OVER AN FO3 STYLE ONE

>>43685012
I just can't get myself to give a single shit about the son or the dead wife. I'd rather build a fucking deathfort with walls made of howitzers somewhere together with robo waifu but no - gotta find the little shit.

>>43685025
It's less about them being a tiefling actually and more that the tribe itself was described as extremely isolationist. They look out for their own and only their own (and exile those who are unable to take care of themselves, spartan-style)... and yet they just randomly decide to take in some non-human baby and raise it as one of their own for no real reason. These are people who will literally leave their own children to die if they're a liability to the tribe and consider any outsiders as something to be killed.

>>43685053
They are bethesda. If after Skyrim you expected a good storyline in new fallout you must be insane.

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>>43685063
It's hard to care about someone you saw for 1 minute.

>>43685012
What the fuck does character devolpment and agency have to do with backstory in this case?

Because OP said backstory.

>>43685068
Again. The child was weird as fuck and they are barbarians. As far as anyone is concerned they probably didn't even knew what tieflings are. They found a weird-ass infant and took it back to shaman. He saw the horns and decided that it must be a gift from the Great Auroch Spirit.

>>43685077
Because backstory must define your character, and not be a pile of out of place facts that you pull out of your ass when it suits you. Come on, it's Fallout 4 nitpicking thread now.

>>43684918
No backstory.

"I don't need a backstory."

Hobo with a shotgun.

The one in which a level 1 character kills level 10 monsters.

A list of shit they did, but no characterization, no choices, no development.

The one that isn't written down and changes all the time.

The one that isn't written down and changes all the time... to make them better than you.

One where the author talks about shit they just don't know anything about.

A list of things they are, and magical portents, masquerading as a backstory.

Sex change.

Rape.

Ayn Rand.

One in which the character finds everything easy and does everything right on the first try and never struggles with anything, effortlessly defeating experts. Which is to say, wish fulfillment.

If I can tell what your fetish is, you're doing it wrong.

>>43684995
>half-tiefling

Aren't tieflings by definition the product of a diluted bloodline? Wouldn't a half-tiefling just be another tiefling?

>>43685077
I don't think you understand what a backstory is, or what a character is. A character makes choices. They struggle. Mistakes are made. They feel, and have opinions, and quirks ("quirky" is not a quirk).

>>43685103
>Sex change.
>Rape.
>Ayn Rand.
I wonder if you placed them from bad to worst.

>>43684918
Years and years ago, there was this guy who tried to give his character the saddest past he could imagine.

He really heaped on the tragedy. Childhood trauma, dead childhood friend, abandonment, dead parents, abusive foster parents, dead foster parents, attacked by bandits and left for dead, taken in by a beautiful stranger who nurses him back to health and then she betrays him, feels guilty and repents it then she dies. This character now has no one, is covered in scars, and has some mark that makes him a pariah pretty much everywhere.

It was sort of like a shitty spineless dime store version of Guts with about twice the amount of the sadpast and none of the charm.

Reading that back story was like seeing the world's greatest masochist have the whole world line up to take a big steaming dump on his chest and likely loving every minute.

>>43685108
Yeah, pretty much, but the player insisted only one parent was a tiefling and made a point of it constantly (even though the character supposedly didn't know her real parents or anything about them).

>>43685108
Yes, tieflings are half-human, the other half being devils or demons, I don't remember which. And I have no idea what happens if you breed them. I assumed they were sterile. If you use Mendelian genetics, you have a 25% chance of getting a human child, a 25% chance of getting a demon child, and a 50% chance of getting another tiefling. If you wanted to be clever, you could apply British colonial law, so if they were only 1/8th demon (an "octoroon") they could be considered legally human.

>>43685122
Can you imagine if a backstory had all three? I'm not sure in which order it would be worst.

>>43685053
New Vegas didn't count as a"main line" game so naturally it continued in the crap frame of Fallout 3. Stupid Wasteland Jesus sprawling storyline.

That said, what a lame reason for a quest. The "gotta go find (family member)" backstory is so cliche, especially when paired with any sort of normal happy family upbringing done so fast it might as well have been a montage. Fallout 3 and 4 both do it. It's almost as bad as "must save princess" on the cliche scale.

Fallout 3 is pretty much a fish out of water who has daddy issues so he goes after his daddy. It's not like he could have, ya know, reasoned with the leadership. They have a dwindling population and need the blood. So stupid!

Fallout 4 is pretty much "What backstory?". A soldier dude got married, punched out a kid and was assigned a spot on a vault. Boring and cliche for double lame points. At least it wasn't offensive on top of it.

Anyone able to complete the trifecta of Boring, Cliche and Offensive?

>>43685144
>Can you imagine if a backstory had all three?
I don't know about sex change, but Terry Goodkind's books might be a good fit.

>>43685123
the word for that is woobie

>>43685141
>but the player insisted only one parent was a tiefling
Don't most tieflings have just one tiefling parent? Demonic genes are dominant or some shit. How would you even define half-tiefling? Someone with a half of tiny bit of demonic blood? Isn't this like being a half-noble or a half-blacksmith?

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>>43685153

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>>43685145
>Anyone able to complete the trifecta of Boring, Cliche and Offensive?

There's a new Mass Effect coming out.

A gladiator who was literally the son of a woman and a lion.

>>43685145
>offensive
>complains about MUH DAMSELS

so are you from kotaku or polygon

>>43685171
We have a winner. Of the lion was a bull on the other hand it would be an immortal classic.

>>43685167
>Terry Goodkind
>libertarian

He's an objectivist, not the same thing.

>>43685163
I think the point here was that they wanted their character to be "demonic" while still being "hot". In this case the character Anon was describing probably just wanted an excuse to have free fire magic with none of the social drawbacks of actually being, you know, obviously demonic.

>>43685177
You could get away with a lot two thousand years ago.

>>43685171
to be fair, you were playing with a 4 year old

>>43685178
I for one think your half-man, half-lion is creative and fascinating.

>IRL
Trying to recall the worst, but it was probably around the level of "Did 10 push ups, 10 sit ups, 10 squats, and 1km of running every day." which stands out in my memory as being terrible.

>Online
Strong competition, but probably the worst being "Lived with his peaceful tribe on a paradise island, until some country's navy one day attacked and started killing everyone for no reason. Amid the massacre, he succumbed to some ancient evil spirit entity of the island and it took over his body, after which he/it proceeded to slaughter literally everything, not just his own friends and family but every single living thing on the island. Every animal, every plant, him personally individually killing every living thing with his bare hands. All the while he was conscious and forced to watch from his eyes as the demon spirit had controlled his body to do this. Now he travels with the demon spirit inside, and he seeks revenge against the forces that caused the massacre to begin with. Also sometimes he just randomly kills people but can't be held responsible because it's the demon controlling him."

>>43685053
Because Betheseda wants an interesting well build world with a story that tells you to go into the world where the world is waiting for you to do things and has waited for you since the beginning, instead of an interesting well enough build world with a great story that gives you an actual reason to be in the world, yet give you the chance to be the change you want or let things stagnate as you wish and history to it.

>>43685168
I haven't played Mass Effect for the most part, but I'm not so sure the "Offensive" part is in Shephard's backstory before we get ahold of her/him. Care to elaborate?

Decent joke anyway.

>>43685163
I think there was a bit of >>43685179 going on, yeah. The only "demonic" features the character had was pale skin, red eyes, and pointed ears. I don't think it's so much that they wanted to hide their demonic heritage so much as the player just wanted their character to look sexy, yeah (I think the rules list a number of traits you HAVE to pick from if you're playing a "real" tiefling). Although the player DID bluff that they were a rare breed of half-elf at one point in the campaign... so I dunno. It may have been both reasons.

>>43685108
>>43685141
>>43685144

Even in 4th and 5th editions where Tieflings are their own race it's specifically stated that if a child has a Tiefling parent they are born 100% Tiefling, because that's how Bloodline Curses fucking work.

>>43685176
Neither, just stating that it's pretty cliche.

The most cliche quest reasons I can think of are:
Rescue (family member)
Save the Princess
Get item for noble
Kill evil dude

As to offensive backstory, I'm thinking more like finding out that suave special ops guy became a soldier because he wants to screw corpses. I actually did see that in one hentai and noped my way on out of there.

>>43685215
To be fair, this was Pathfinder... so basically 3.5.

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>>43685122
You...
I like you.

>>43684918
I once played a other dimension version of Heinz Guderian where he was from a universe where the uk became a facist powerhouse instead of Germany.

Thought that was pretty bad.

>>43684995
Well, I did save a baby dredge in Banner Saga, so that's plausible, buy reader of the story is a testament to poor taste

>>43685210
>demonic features
>not hot
Brain has performed an illegal operation and will be shut down.

>>43685215
> No such thing as a half tieflings
> Tieflings will screw anything

Anyone else see this as bad mechanics? Given a few generations pretty much everything is tiefling.

>>43685228
Doesn't sound that bad. But maybe it's because alternate history is my weakness.

>>43685234
You assume people want to fuck tieflings and have children with them which i am pretty sure is not the thing. Devil-children demi-human abominations and so forth.

>>43685234
Not everyone wants to screw tieflings. And ultimately bloodline comes to thin to carry on demonic features.

>>43685218

Well in that case aren't Tieflings anyone with demon or devil heritage more than a generation back but still having noticeable effects?

That is as long as they have any noticable demon/devil traits they're a tiefling and if they don't they're a human?

Like that point at which your Native American heritage stops qualifying you for college grants you so stop asking about it already white boy?

...not that I'm bitter or anything.

>>43685232
Well... if you're not talking about a Succubus, Vampire, or Stephanie Myers book... yeah, most "demons" aren't exactly a "sexy" lot. Look up historic artistic renditions of demons (NOT ANIME) and most of them are grotesque warped chimera-things. I mean... I guess if you're a furry and into things with goat legs and three heads, yeah... otherwise no.

>>43685012
>>43685053
>get robbed and shot trying to deliver a package
>tear across the wasteland out for bloody revenge
>decide while you're here you may as well determine the fate of the civilised world, effortlessly toppling, saving or uplifting factions on a whim
>literally just a fucking mailman

Yeah that obsidian, such writing, much backstory. Muh bear and bull indeed.

I always thought fiends blood effected like an entire family and it would just occasionally pop up in descendants not that one of your parents was actually a tiefling.

>>43685250
>Not liking The Postman
I mean, Kostner saw better days, but it was okay.

>>43685234
>>43685232
I feel like demonic features aren't as attractive in-universe as they are to us. I realize danger is sexy and all, but in most fantasy settings the longer you carry on a conversation with someone with red eyes and horns, the more likely you are to die violently.

>>43685234

In 4th and 5th editions I'm pretty sure only Humans can Reproduce with Tieflings.

On account of the original cursed bloodline being human.

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>>43685250
You're right the game would be better if you just did mail man things the entire time.

>>43685249
>Not liking sexy-ass demons with faces on their groins and snakes coming out of his asses.
But yeah. We are talking about tiefling. Horns, prehensile tails, natural fuck-me-boots in form of hooves and other minor things usually given to tieflings are hot as fuck.

>>43684918
>I'm actually the king and therefore should get whatever I want from stores

The same player also wanted to receive all the tax money from the kingdom so he could buy a Deck of Many Things and other cheese.

>>43685250
I always saw the postman as a raging storm of alternation for the Wasteland who was pulled into all of this against his will or a man determined to finish a job he knows will pay better than anything he has ever done before and along the way proves how prowess as a solo agent.

>>43685242
>>43685246
Want isn't always an option especially if your race is "evil".

>>43685275
Point taken, though I have seen this sort of effect play out in real life where "freaky" things like miscolored eyes are seen as exotic. Bette Davis (purple!) and David Bowie (Problem with pupil causes false heterochromia) are known for their freaky eyes and were considered sexy for them.

>>43685276
Well, at least it's only the human race going extinct, what with all the tieflings and half-humans around and humans being used like cannon fodder in general with some of the shortest lifespans among humanoids outside of gnolls and kobolds coupled with long growth periods (15+ years to breeding age). Still sounds bad to me.

My head is now picturing the last remaining humans used as breeding chattel for cannon fodder in centuries-long wars fought between longer-lived humanoids against the Tiefling empire and all the kidnappings and rapes used to further wreck the human gene pool.

This thread has made me fear that my backstory for my tiefling paladin is shit. Please tell me it is not so:

>Live in a rental home with his parents, an old adventurer and a bard
>One night get a letter under his door from his parents that has "We might be running late" written hastily
>Rent goes unpaid so he has to take off into the streets
>Few years of this before driven out of the town by an angry mob of merchants
>Escape into the nearest forest
>Find an old, jolly paladin there
>Tries to pickpocket the pally, gets caught, but the pally instead offers food, shelter and company
>About 20 years of this and now tiefling himself is a happy little paladin who prefers to be fair than righteous

Ancient oath by the by as a final note

>>43685275
Ehm, I'm not completely sure if I agree -- if you run into a succubus looking person IRL, its probably Satan or friends and you're probably insane, hallucinating, about to be damned to hell, or all of the above. If you run into one in an RPG, well, there's a tiny tiny tiny chance that it may be an actual fiend, but 99% of the time its just a harmless tiefling.

HALF

TARRASQUE

>>43685339
>you're probably insane, hallucinating, about to be damned to hell, or all of the above
And that's the precise reason why i would try to fuck it. There is nothing i can lose anymore!

>>43685347
>I am Foklork the Mighty barbarian
>My tribe has a right of passage: Fuck a beast and sire your children with it
>My dad was the stronkest of them all, so he fucked a tarrasque
>And that is why i CAN and WILL have a natural 30 and 40 con you twit GM

>>43684918
A half-ogre, half-elf of highborne samurai lineage who had inherited Earth Bending and was spectacularly beautiful.

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>>43685012
"My son has been kidnapped. :("
"Aw man that sucks. Can you help us rebuild the militia and take back the Commonwealth? :)"
Mfw

>>43685338
Cliche, but not awful. Is less angsty and special-snowflake than most tiefling characters I've seen.

>>43685366
So go save (heh) your son, then come back and fix everyone's lives.

>>43685365
Cliche, offensive and boring. We have a winrar.

>>43685363
So bad it's good. Might steal this for a non-serious game.

>>43685366
Not gonna lie, I'm tempted into getting the game and playing with the a constant "nigger what" reaction each time.

>>43685365
Not gonna lie, ogre-elf could potentially be pretty damn attractive actually. Giant buff guy with crude and overly masculine features softened by his elven heritage? Sign me in for some of that!

>>43685250
post-apocalyptic mailmen are probably pretty badass tbf

Taken from the infamous tale of Luke

>He was a huge weeaboo. Every character had flowing hair, and katanas, and I'm sure he tried at least once to have one with wings. (And the one that had 'Skin Colour: Normal' listed on the sheet, something that made the entire table crack up when it came to light.)

>He would make up his stats and modifiers - his character sheet itself would bear no resemblance to anything even remotely like the rules; and all of the various numbers listed would be completely unrelated to each other. He would literally roll a dice, and then say another random number anytime he was called to do anything. It got to the point where one DM sat him down, and walked him through the entirety of character creation again based on the classes he had listed, and ended up having to prettymuch adjust everything about him - he was about eight levels higher than us, had two stats that implied he'd rolled a nineteen, extra feats, all kinds of crap.

>He still just made up numbers when he felt like it.

>It was this occasion where we saw the inside of his character folio though. He had this little black book that he used for character sheets, and he's sit during sessions leant back with a pencil, with the book folded up like he was fairly obviously writing things surreptitiously, but we'd just ignored it as being him being fucking weird.

>Turns out he'd been drawing. Very bad porn. Of Dizzy from Guilty Gear. And wolves. And, well, prettymuch everything you see on the ass end of deviantart. And there were pages that were stuck together; or smeared from him obviously having stroked them ...

>Shit makes me cringe just thinking about it.

>>43685383
>offensive
What?

>>43685395
Say what you want. Crazy weeaboo pervert could make a pretty interesting character.

>>43685383
>Cliche, offensive and boring. We have a winrar.
He also wanted to start with an ancestral katana that was inhabited by all his fore-bears who gave him advice and was unbreakable and could hit ghosts and was extra effective against evil.
>>43685388
Normally I am fine with wacky race combos, it's just the fact that he wanted to be the chosen heir of like, Japan's Emperor with invincible weapons and the powers of his favourite Naruto character x2.

Acelgah (a fucked up way to pronounce Acelga: spanish for chard) is a mentally retarded wood elf who lived in the forest like an animal and got coaxed by the royal authorities into adventure as a way to redeem his crimes

El Duende Melodias (the melody goblin/elf/dwarf) is an artist whose main art work is cutting arms and legs and putting them inside giant jars of Formaldehyde to sell to rich people

Jarfold Skold is a high elf who, because he was raised in Dawnstar he believes himself to be a nord and he must return to his hometown with 1000 teeth from enemies to prove his worth

Tiria is an orcish girl who had to flee her home where she lived with her uncle to hone her fighting abilities because an elf magician girl moved there and started to sexually harass his uncle and won't leave, so Tiria must get stronger in order to kick the elf out

>>43685339
I'm sure if any of us met someone like that we would assume it's a fantastic makeup job at first.

>>43685387
>wanting to roleplay in FO4
You just can't.

A) HATE NEWSPAPERS
B) SUPPORT NEWS
X) SARCASTIC
Y) NEWSPAPERS?

>>43685413
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6b0ftfKFEJg

I.. I like Hancock

>>43685069
[This door is blocked by chains on the other side]

>>43685417
Don't forget that you can never be a retard. No matter how smart you are, you always talk like a man from upper-middle class with decent education.

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>>43685417
Don't remind me...

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>>43685413
>Tiria is an orcish girl who had to flee her home where she lived with her uncle to hone her fighting abilities because an elf magician girl moved there and started to sexually harass his uncle and won't leave, so Tiria must get stronger in order to kick the elf out

>>43685413
>goblin/elf/dwarf
That must been one, crazy-ass orgy.

>>43685426
That was one of the most weirdly good things about NV.

The different feel to the game between 1 and 10 intelligence.

>>43685398
> Highborne Elf
>> So European it hurts
> Samurai elves
>> Europe sucks, Let's steal from Japan!
> Not cool enough, add Earth Bending
>> And let's totally ignore that's Earth benders are based on CHINA not Japan!

It's like a kaleidoscope of racism in a weeaboo shell of "Japan is Superior" mixed with Munchin-level stat crap. No respect for any heritages used, real or fake, all just to chase that special snowflake syndrome. It's like a kit-kat of offensiveness: so many layers all candy-coated to try to hide it all.

>>43685436
no, it's just that there isn't a correct translation for the word "Duende" and might mean any of those things

>>43685436
I'd like to imagine the elf and dwarf traits cancel each other out, so he's just a goblin

>>43685376
Can you even do that without running into levels problems? Wouldn't you need to grind a fuckload?

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>>43685413
>Tiria is an orcish girl who had to flee her home where she lived with her uncle to hone her fighting abilities because an elf magician girl moved there and started to sexually harass his uncle and won't leave, so Tiria must get stronger in order to kick the elf out

oh my

>>43685439
You get the HURR HURR HURR noise randomly with Idiot Savant enabled. Closest you're going to get.

>>43685439
That's becasue NV was Fallout in first person while FO3 and FO4 are respectively Oblvion and Skyrim with guns and less magic sprinkled with more ruins and weaker enemies.

Seriously, if i am fighting against super mutants, 3 meter tall towers of muscle i don't want to see or be able to fight them properly before the the half point of the game.

>>43685451
Maybe your character realizes he's been thrust into a strange new world and he needs to put himself through his paces and do favors for some helpful people who know how the wasteland works before he runs off half-cocked looking for his son.

Hmm judge mine guys.

Pathfinder.
Orc barbarian from standard Orc tribe.
Uneventful life full of getting beat and beating.
Family and friends along natural orc lines.
Joins party to pillage, loot, sexy up hookers while smeared from head to toe in jam, you know the usual stuff.

>>43685451
Isn't the game level scaled?
Or is it one of those "random encounters are, but story missions are preset leveled" games?

>>43685467
There's nothing wrong with the classics. Just because it's not a challenge to roleplay doesn't mean it can't be fun for you and your group.

>>43685442
Fact that you see elves based around asian cultures instead of european ones as racist says way more about you than it does about the character.

>>43685466
Funny you say that, I haven't ran into an option to ask questions about the wastelands as a whole or the commonwealth yet, even though I'm a militiamen general and friend of the BoS.

>>43685468
All I know is I went through a dungeon for one of the militiamen sidequests, every raider had a pretty skull next to his name and took a bunch of headshots to kill. Found more of the same kind adter a few levels, they'd die a fuckload faster. Magic guns, I guess?

>>43685419
>It was the boot

Honestly though it was the small shoe

>>43685474
I have a hard time creating "special" backgrounds for my characters because they all feel so damn corny. There's nothing new under the sun that can make a character feel special other than what is completely baseline. Maybe that's just me but I find that the more details a background story has the mary suer it tends to become.

>>43685189
>1/10 of Saitama
>"When the Fire Nation attacked, I sold my soul for power and now I regret it but what am I supposed to do it's not like I can just un-sell my soul"

Ouch, man.

>>43685506
Why won't you just roll for the backstory using one of those charts you can find in so many goddamn books?

I've got one. This one from one of my less gifted players.

>Traveller, Mongoose Edition
>Player gives up on his original Marine character mid-game after running facefirst into a grenade because he couldn't read
>Asks me if he can make a new character
>I say yes
>"I want to be something fun. Can I be a psionist."
>Uhh yeah if you aren't too bad at it. Also I'm going to have to impose a penalty for you
>Chargen. Gets mauled several times.
>Ask player to make his biography, and also consider where his penalty will go
>Leave for several hours
>Come back
>He has made a man named Darrel.
>Who has glowing mutant eyes that can be disguised by sunglasses
>Bullied as a child for his oddity.
>Gets mauled in a riot.
>Man picks him up and brings him to his underground psionics dojo where he can learn psionics
>Several years later a lynch mob finds out and breaks in.
>Mauls him and kills the instructor guy.
>Manages to escape due to heroic sacrifice of instructor guy
>Pledges vengeance against those who killed his mentor i.e the entire planet.
>Meets up with the other pla-
>NO NO NO NO NO
>MAKE A BETTER CHARACTER OR GET OUT
>Player sulks a bit then decides he wants to go back to his old character.

>>43685144
>Sex changed ayn rand raped me. NOW I'M OUT FOR VENGEANCE.
>And roads.

>>43685497
Well, I tried.

The problem with Bethesda games these days is that they try to be RPGs, action games, and wide-open sandboxes all at once, but the sandbox cheapens the RPG elements, and the RPG elements cheapen the action.

>>43685528
>sex changed ayn rand
not like that'd be a huge jump

>>43685103
Meh, I wouldn't say rape necessarily worsens the backstory. I remember my group once had one PC that couldn't stand men due to that, and some other reasons: as in, not muh soggy knees, but actually being scared shitless or being closer than a few feet to a man, without really hating everyone and each of them, so it made for interesting roleplay, as she tried to get over her phobia in order to better cooperate with the group.

Thing is, I feel most people that use rape as a backstory want something bad to happen to their characters, something they can play victim or cause drama with, but that has not serious consequences (how many PCs with muh raep backstory actually get pregnant?), even worse if it's done with the intention of showing that apparently, none can resist fugging them.

About sex change, I could have probably seen it working some time ago, specially if played mostly for laughs, but with SJWs around, can't say it would turn out right anymore.

>>43685515
Those are just as snow flakey as the ninja samurai demigods people come up with

>>43685366
Implying fallout 1 and2 had such amazing premises

>>43685532
His(Her?) name is Anna Randy.

>>43685524
Is it really that bad? I think that fear of mary sues went so far that people will rage against everything that isn't Joe Average, the certified everyman.

>>43685537
At least those are backstories. At least someone actually took their time to figure out they want to be a ninja-samurai demigod. They fail spectacularly but they at least fucking tried. You don't even try. You bring an empty page and somehow feel superior because of it.

>>43685553

Technically, I have no issues with his character being glowy eyes snowflake man.

What I have an issue with is that he's essentially pledging bloody vengeance against an entire planet's worth of people and the law.

Not to mention what he wrote was essentially a shitty "A kind man picked him up, taught him everything and kept him alive, and then when a lynch mob broke in, the only man who showed him kindness told him to run and sacrificed his life to made sure he got away." kind of story.

I know it doesn't look bad in greentext form, but the biography he sent me was fucking cringe-worthy.

>>43685482
> lol, weeaboo defense
Admit it, you stapled it together with zero regard to culture just a racist "Japan is superior" mentality. High Elves that practice Bushido... when they're mostly archers due to poor constitution stats. Come on. By the way, real samurai weren't warrior poets and they were made redundant by arrows and firearms taking over the battlefield. Samurai were mostly paper pushers living on the equivalent of a NEET income by the end of things.

>>43685588

> real samurai weren't warrior poets and they were made redundant by arrows

...most Samurai were Archers and Cavalry. Areas in which a lot constitution and a high dex line up pretty well.

Elves are honestly not a bad choice if you want a fantasy race with samurai.

>>43685588
>made redundant by arrows and firearms
Samurai used arrows and firearms, you silly goose.

>>43685577
I hate when people like you bitch about backstories not being sufficient, sometimes it's hard to make a decent one, I'd like to see you do better

>>43685588
I didn't made it. And i'm in no way japanophile. But raging about samurai elves is just as dumb as raging about minotaur vikings or naga knights.

>>43684918
I'm someone who is a hero for fun.

>>43685599
Samurai used swords and were seem as "Weak" if they used a bow so no samurai wanted to be an archer or in the calvary. Being moved to the back or given a bow was a sign of "you suck" or "coward". In fact, that's why losing your fingers joint by joint starting with your pinky is an old punishment for dishonor: it weakens your sword hand and reduces you to bow status. Contrast with elves who are all about that bow.

If Orcs had better civilization maybe that would work or Samurai could just be humans.

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>>43685628
>the "DO BETTER THAN TLAK" excuse

Aren't you too young to be on 4chan?

>>43685651

That is not remotely how samurai worked...

That and: Elves have a pretty strong history of swordplay too. They get automatic sword proficiency. Orcs don't.

>>43685628

It's not about it being insufficient.

It's about it being way out of place in the campaign that was being run, and especially from a player who was making this mid-campaign after he abandoned his previous character because his marine was too boring.

I've since lost the backstory itself, but I still remember it. And it's bad.

Not to mention, keep in mind that I don't need some vengeance-filled fucko ruining my game by lashing out in a vengeance-filled haze in order to fulfill his desires for revenge.

And don't think he can't do it, either. His Chaotic Stupidity lead him to steal a slaver ship, continue it's business, shoot at a bunch of Imperial Marines because why not, then space a bunch of his own crewmembers during a boarding because he's "A barbarian Warlord that doesn't care for the lives of those not of his own tribe, and doesn't take orders from authorities."

That was the first character he lost.

>>43685662
Not according to all the historical stuff I've been reading. Also the only reasons orcs don't have sword proficiency is lack of culture. Someone had to take the "barbarian" slot and it fell on orcs.

>>43685676

And the fact that elves DO have a long history of swordplay to the extent they have racial proficiencies, something most other races don't have?

>>43685653
Personally, I always saw the issue as anyone can give critique, but those with experience hold more weight with their critique

from the story of Luke: the spawn of nurgle:
>“I am the leader of a small gong of thieves. We were hired to steal a jewel from the thing of the land. We was were in an inn when we were approached by a powerful stalker, who made us go.”

Hopefully this one isn't too bad (it's for Pathfinder):

>some Shelynite clergy are headed back home from a pilgrimage, hired adventurers to guard them
>some Kellid Barbarians attack the caravan for its loot
>adventurers kill them all while priests cower behind wagons
>rogue finds a baby, brings it to the group, and is about to kill it
>priests tell them not to kill the baby
>one of the priests adopts the baby
>kid grows up at the temple, not knowing why he looks, smells, and sounds so different from all the other kids
>he's more prone to get angry with things, too
>by teenage years the kid just thinks he's a horrible demon child or something if he can't be all-loving-Neutral Good like everyone he grew up with
>one day down at the docks he gets into a fight with some Chelish kid
>enters his first Rage and nearly kills the guy before Rogue shows up and stabs him
>by the time authorities arrive, Rogue is going on about "doing what I should have done fifteen years ago." Turns out he's been watching for longer than anyone knew
>Shelyn priests show up, horrified at situation
>kids runs away in shame the moment he stops having knives lodged in his organs, sort of stumbles across the rest of the party after running halfway across Avistan

>>43685653
It's not an excuse, if you can't do better than something your critiquing, you really have no business complaining

>>43685651
>>43685676
You seriously don't know enough about Samurai or history to pretend like you do.

You should really just drop that point.

>>43685676
Got a link? The only thing similar to that I've heard of is the largely false claim that samurai refused to use firearms because they were dishonourable.

>>43685719

So basically, every single person that has criticized any aspect of Fallout 4 shouldn't be talking if they can't do better.

Okay, gotcha.


Incase you haven't figured out, it's sarcasm. You're a 'tard.

>>43685719

That's not really valid. Someone can identify flaws in something even if they themselves can't create a flawless one in turn.

Or did Roger Ebert have no position being a critic and we should instead listen to Micheal Bay?

>>43685719
Ah, the "only a chef can criticize my food" fallacy. Anyone with taste buds can tell when something tastes bad, even if they can't make the dish properly themselves. It's called being a biologically functional human being.

>>43685178
I wouldn't call him an objectivist so much as a guy who thinks he is, but misses the point.

It's like he read atlas shrugged, and thought to himself "man this central pacifist character hero is boring. Let's make it more interesting by having the main guy kill everyone in the name of non intervention!"

is there a point to maxing int?
most of the people here seem to disregard it and go for flat fighting stats

>>43685809
lol wrong board
disregard

>>43685809
In NV hell yes.

Int was god stat.

Cha and Luck down to 1 and Int up to 10 and you are Gordon Freeman.

It determined how many skill points you got at each level up.

>>43685719
>>43685750

You don't have to be a chef to know when you're eating shit.

>>43685749
Roger Ebert is kind of a bad example. He did made a movie and it was fucking glorious.

>>43685068
>Child shows up looking like your god
>Do you let it die?

Hell if anything, it could probably cause social uproar and change throughout the tribe with this omen.

Sounds like you're just autistic.

>>43685549
Careful with that greentext. I didn't imply anything, chum. The point was people hit you with insane requests only seconds after finding out you've got important shit to. You don't have to say yes but I'm not exactly going to stop and ask a paramedic for directions while he's in the middle of performing cpr or some shit. What kind of fucking cunt would dare ask you that sort of shit after you just told him you woke up literally hours ago from a 200 year sleep and that his fucking son has (as far as he knows) just been kidnapped? It's hilariously socipathic.

>>43685012

Who the fuck plays Bethesda games for the story anymore?

Here's your actual backstory: you're looking for your son, but not really. You just want to fuck shit up, wear the fanciest armor, shoot the fanciest guns, shoot the fanciest people, and collect all the fanciest collectibles.

Might as well drop a character of mine in here that I'm unsure about. Kinda wanted to make a character with a semi-dark backstory because I've a tendency to avoid those like the plague (mostly out of fear of Gary Stu accusations).

>Human Brawler with a proficiency in furniture (pathfinder, I know, I know)
>Kind of took too many hits to the head during his plentiful fighting (8 int and wis, rolled badly in chargen) so he's a bit daft and mildly unstable. Not in a "LOLIMRANDUM" way or anything like that, mind.
>Grew up in the slums with an abusive drunken dad, cliche stuff like that
>Got into a lot of scraps as a kid and continued scrapping as he got older
>In and out of prison a lot for assault, battery, etc.
>Eventually realized he was pretty good at hitting people with chairs, decides to make a profit off it
>First goes home and kicks the tar out of his drunkard of a dad
>Wanders off into the world to go hit things with chairs and get paid while doing it

And before you ask, my relationship with my dad is fine, so this isn't a weird selfinsert revenge fantasy or anything like that.

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>>43685858
Not anon, but from what was written, it was never specifically stated that the child looked like their god. Let's be honest, the chances of that happening are pretty slim.

Also
>Half Demon
>Only female warrior in a tribe full of male-only warriors
>Somehow better warrior than all of them
>Develops self-taught snowflake magic-sword fighting in a tribe that may not even have magic
>Implied that she humped her master for secret techniques (whatever the fuck this means)
>Has no unsexy traits despite being a demon
>Is a half-half-demon somehow
>Instead of doing anything interesting with her parents, the creator seems to have just written them out entirely
>Tribe is described as super isolationist, character is an adventurer presuably travelling with other player's characters

That character sounds like it had alot more problems than just the adoption thing.

>>43685880
>Who the fuck plays Bethesda games for the story anymore?

Bingo, if you're gonna play Bethesda, play for the open world and the weaponry. Also the music tends to be pretty good most of the time and the lore's pretty solid too.

>>43685888
Dude. I would have hard time finding a character less questionable than this. Stop being such a big pussy. RPGs are a form of escapism, it's ok to be a little special sometimes.

>>43685880
B-but Elder Scrolls! Le CHIM!

>>43685809
Do you want robot slave companions? Then take int.

>>43685880
>>43685898

Here's your actual backstory: MODS ARE AMAZING!

ftfy

>>43685888
Thats not that far from real life.

>>43685921
Having mods be the baseline to enjoying something does not make that something good. Just like D&D

>>43685921
And yet people would rather pay bethesda than buy mods.

Pirate Fallout
Pay mod developers

That way you're allocating your money to the real talent behind bethesda's success.

>>43684995
What the fuck is a half-tiefling?

>>43685929
Yeah... but the mods in DnD suck. The mods in Bethesda games are always amazing (if you can bother shifting through the sea of crap to find them).

>>43685921
>fallout 4 does not have a Data Files option on the launch menu
We can still mod it... right?

>>43685929
But fallout 4 is a lot more fun action wise than the last two. And modifying guns and armour is a lot better than shitty breaking down guns to repair other guns.

>>43685939
I thought they were releasing proper mod tools later? I dunno, I thought I heard that somewhere

>>43685936
You already missed several replies debating that.

TLDR: It's basically a tiefling without any "unsexy" traits... even though "pass for human" is a trait they can already take.

>>43685947
Yeah, next year.

>>43685934
>modding a game is comparable to making the game
A hurr durr.

>>43685939
http://www.nexusmods.com/fallout4/mods/495/?

>>43685967
I wouldn't call vanillia bethesda products games so much as buggy templates.

Bethesda essentially puts the money down to license the engine, paints a world with some token quests, and releases modding tools to the public to actually fill that world with hundreds of dollars worth of content, all while patching everything faster than bethesda can. Every job bethesda has except "license the engine" and "hire voice actors of varying levels of talent" the modders do better, and generally faster.

>>43685338
I somewhat like this, gm has an open ended idea with what to do with the parents and whatnot.
I'd be happy to game with you.

>>43685958
I still don't get why would you not take horns and prehensile tail. What could be MORE sexy than handlebars and few feet long extra cock?

>>43685985
Its probably less sexy in a world where those features are usually found on things about to burn down your town and headbutt you to death.

>>43685985
You already missed several replies debating THAT too.

TL;DR: Most fantasy settings aren't your magical realm and the general population will probably respond with varying levels of fear and/or disgust.

Also the character in question is female.

>>43685250
He has brain damage, what did you expect?

>>43685938
>the mods in DnD suck
>what is Path of War

>>43685977
Those are hot opinions but have you considered the fact that you don't know what the fuck you are talking about?

>>43686004
>FO:NV is just a brain-damaged man blundering about the Mojave causing trouble

>>43686003
>Also the character in question is female.
So?

>>43686012
Sounds remarkably like Burning Man.

>>43686003
>>43685997
Yeah, and we all know that in real world people looking dangerous are never considered attractive.

>>43686006
Having experienced bethesda games for years now, and seeing the slow decline from morrowind to fallout 4, I think I do. Past Morrowind, bethesda games aren't fun without mods. Fun is neccessary for a game to be worth money. Ergo, past morrowind, bethesda games aren't worth money. If a game isn't worth money without mods, and is worth money with mods, it's probably the mod makers who deserve the money.

New Vegas was cool though, so pay obsidian.

>>43686034
Well nobody in the real world has literal demon horns and spade tales and cloven-hooved feet.

I'm pretty sure even an /r/Atheism-tier fedoracore neckbeard would freak out if he saw someone who, for all intents and purposes, looked like a literal demon.

>>43686034
Dangerous in the "he'll fuck up anyone for me", sure. Dangerous in the "he'll blow me up for not wearing burka", not quite as much. It's a matter of perspective.

>>43686034
Find me someone in the real world with horns and a tail and we'll see.

>>43686046
Fallout 4 combat is way more fun than the other two recent fallouts. If it wasn't for the retarded dialog choices I would say its better in almost every way.

>>43686046
>bethesda games aren't fun without mods
That's your opinion. Morrowind wasn't that great anyway.

>>43686060
I'm only a couple of hours in, but it doesn't seem that different to FO3/NV to me.

>>43686048
>>43686051
It's the fantasy land. There are weirder things out there. Also given how your average joe would be way more likely to meet a tiefling than a real demon (and live to tell the tale) wouldn't human-like demons get confused for tieflings more often than the other way around?

>>43685407
I kek'd

>>43686071
All the animals have new gimmicks and movement patterns, humanoid enemies will actually take cover instead of stand in the open like retards and when they cant they try to duck out of your aim, and combat actually feels dangerous this time. To me at least the fights seem to be quicker and more deadly.

>>43686097
Shooting feels better too

>>43686078
More likely you would see something vaguely demon looking and nope the fuck out just in case. I mean you wouldn't mess with a wolf just because its not as dangerous as a dire wolf.

Amnesiac.

>>43686097
It sure does sounds fun! But the dialogue system is still turning me off.

>>43686071
So you haven't actually played the game at all. Why didn't you just say so?

You're like those people who think watching an LP counts as playing the game. Or even worse, a professional games "journalist".

>>43686110
But you might mess around with a dog. Or a wolf you drunkenly mistaken for a dog because you never actually saw a wolf.

>>43685103
>Sex change.
>Rape.
I think those can be implemented productively.

Everything else you're spot-on with.

Don't forget
>The one where the player doesn't care about anything and has no motivation other than going "meh" and ignoring plothooks to be an aloof twat.

>>43686106
That too. Also it might just be me but I feel like this is the first fallout game where ammo feels limited. I have four different guns so I don't get stuck.
Also the first fallout where I bother with food. Drug use is also apparently more fun.
>>43686115
Its pretty dumb. Make sure to quick save.

>>43686122
Yeah and its still a good way to get yourself bitten.

>>43686118
Do you think there are only two people in this conversation or something? My first comment on the subject was >>43685939

>>43686078
That entirely depends on how the GM portrays the setting. I've seen settings where Tieflings are extremely rare and considered only fit for extermination when they are encountered. I've played setting where entire countries are run by a single race and will treat ANYONE else like an abomination, even more "civilized" races like elves or dwarves.

Just because tieflings are a playable race doesn't mean every GM is going to have them be a significant and accepted part of every civilization, if any at all.

>>43684918
>blah blah something about having no parents
>lives in shadowfell
>goes to assassination school/guild
>is best assassin
>guild/school gets it's shit kicked in by some other assassination school/guild
>was such a good assassin that he got raised as a revenant by some death god
>now for no reason he's here to help the party go kill some elf

>>43685513
Ten Punch Man could be somewhat useful

>>43685189
>Trying to recall the worst, but it was probably around the level of "Did 10 push ups, 10 sit ups, 10 squats, and 1km of running every day." which stands out in my memory as being terrible.

Behold, the post of someone who legitimately has autism

>>43685692
>small gong of thieves

This is going to be a magic item in my next capaign.

>>43684918
I have a good friend who is actually a good roleplayer, she just made some really annoying characters. They were all insane, often kids, and had either been victims of incest or murdered someone. Often both.

She later admitted that her crazy, grimdark characters were really unoriginal and a kind of phase she was not really aware of before she looked back and thought 'what the fuck was I thinking?'

She does still tend towards 'quirky' characters, but nothing that's really annoying to game play or overtly dark.

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http://pastebin.com/FrNAS0xc
This one.

It's a level 1 campaign.

>>43686206
I also intend to use this, just gotta stat it.

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>>43685830
Yes you have to.
Now eat it and stop complaining.

>>43686237
>hot topic color scheme
>tsundere type attitude
>overly long back story. Its just a beserker who fucking hates demons and clerics
>"I hate what I become!" - this will result in a terrible monologue, guaranteed.
>refuses to speak
>hates goodberries

Sera is pretty shitty.

>>43684918
I think the worst is the generic "I'm on a quest for revange, because X killed my Y"

Seriously, this shit is just boring at this point. Revange as motivation to be on wacky adventures? I mean... what if you finally hit the X and get your revange? What then?

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>>43686237
Have a doughnut.

>>43685445
Imp? Goblin? Fairy?

pd: Oi, at least Adaren Grimbold had a good backstory

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>>43684918
>What's the worst backstory you've ever seen?

Read it and weep.

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>>43686237
Why does she hate the church, when Paladins were once her saviors?
Paladins are your friends.

>>43685282
And fallout 4 would clearly be better if there were no side quests and you went straight to find your son.

>>43685941
>fun

Fun is just a buzzword used when you can't explain why something is enjoyable, anon.

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>>43685250
Read the fucking book and shut the fuck up, you shithead

>>43684918
Fuck tg i need an opinion now
>Gnome Barbarian named Jeffery Bitterbrew
>Gnomes are the !not Irish
>He and a bunch of other gnomes were in the !not Barbados being used as slaves when they stole a ship and escaped
>since none of them knew how to navigate a ship, but most of them knew how to sail they ended up in !not Africa
>as the gnomes travel drunkenly across all of !not Africa and !not Europe they are treated awfully by most of the inhabitants because "muh irish problem"
>also because they are being drunk assholes the entire time
>regardless they all become racist assholes
>eventually settle down in !not Romania with the rest of the escaped gnomes
>become an even heavier drinker
>catches his wife cheating on him
>just wants to be alone in the woods with his farm
>some mother fucker blots out the sun
>is on a blood quest to return the sun.
its not mary sue is it?

>>43686405
Brin a shit.

>>43685291
>buy a Deck of Many Things

Whatever made him think he could purchase one of these?

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>>43686444

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>>43685250
>It's ok when you are anonymous peasant doing this shit in generic medieval fantasy
>HURR HOW CAN YOU DO THAT AS A POSTMAN DURR

>>43686522
It's hailed as great writing when it's really not. How is 'some asshole shot you in the head and stole your package' different to 'some asshole shot your spouse and stole your child'? At least you got to meet your spouse and child.

>>43686536
>implying you didn't meet your head

Checkmate atheists

>>43686559
I didn't need that brain anyway.

>>43686536
I cared more about my head than the spouse.

>>43686590
But your brain's a dick

>>43686237
>black swordsman
>woman
>anime ripoff
>eye color bullshit
>turns on mercenaries for being mercenaries

>>43686590
I didn't really care about the plot in any of the Fallout or Elder Scrolls games. I just like to dick around in them.

>>43686536
What is hailed as great writing? Has anyone here said that, aside maybe you?

It's absolutely generic revange story, but it's not a BAD generic story idea, it's absolutely average

>>43686604
>woman
Just over 50% of all women are women, anon.

>>43686605
>Implying Bethesda games have other plot than "kill the main bad guy, after deciding who is the bad guy of your choosing"

>>43686616
>Just over 50% of all women are women, anon.
Pedophile please go

>>43686605
>I don't care about the thing your discussing

Thanks for your input, anon, you're really contributing to the intellectual discourse occurring here.

>>43686613
The bit at the start of the thread where everyone's holding up NV as if it's some paragon of storyline compared to 3 and 4, when it's really not.

>>43684918
There are no bad backstories, only bad characters.

Bad/stupid shit can happen to everyone.


The only thing i dislike is the "parents are dead because im lazy to descripe them" thing

>>43686626
>implying anybody really gives a shit about the plot in TES/FO

>>43686427
Mostly fine. Why does his wife cheating on him matter and what the fuck is a blood quest?
And he seems mid level at best, while blotting out the fucking sun is pretty damn high level.

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>>43685189
>Every animal, every plant, him personally individually killing every living thing with his bare hands.
>every plant
>with his bare hands.
>A terrible being with burning red eyes
>Skin of night and muscles of steel
>Squats and shuffles round the island tearing out clumps of grass while screaming "Nooo!!"
>The grass regrows faster than he can kill it.

>>43686348

Jesus, that took a serious turn for the disturbing.

>>43686616
Why isn't she a Black Swordswoman?

>>43686642
he's kind of just given up and is going out there to die. Kind of like a slayer from WHFB accept less dishonour and more boredom.

>>43686536
At one point you have to rescue your brain after it get kidnapped by an evil wizard/scientist.

also
>>43686595

>>43686616
What are the rest?

>>43686669
I am aware of this. Old World Blues was the best part of NV.

>>43686627
The beginning is stock standard, but it does a better job of wanting you to get into the meat of the branching storylines. And it gives you more narrative freedom than FO3 or 4 in deciding what your character is.

>>43685250
Couriers are in-universe badasses. They have to be able to haul a package across a nation of hostility.

>>43686129
I have two points in the scrounger perk and ammo has replaced all other forms of currency for me.

>>43686689
>but it does a better job of wanting you to get into the meat of the branching storylines. And it gives you more narrative freedom than FO3 or 4 in deciding what your character is.
I don't know about that, but then I've never really been able to get immersed in cRPGs.
I just play them to fuck about in the world.

>>43686661
Its fine. Despair and disinterest aren't great motivators but it's not a Mary Sue.

Part 1

Lilliam named herself.She was abandoned as a baby in a city, a wood elf a long way from home and left to die. She grew up in an orphanage in a city. Seeing as she grew up without the guidance of other wood elves she acted differently from most wood elves. Lilliam is not racist. Lilliam does not treat her body like a temple like most wood elves do. If she wants to drink alcohol (not highly priced elf wine) she will, as well as other things considered bad to put your body through.Anyways back to the orphanage. Growing up in the orphanage was bland, and oftentimes Lilliam was either depressed or bored. No one wanted to adopt the depressed elf girl. Eventually Lilliam decided to leave the orphanage and tried to live on her own. She would go days without food due to a lack of money. Afraid that without a money to feed herself she went hunting for a job. No one would hire her. Thats when she decided she would become an assassin. She thought long and hard about whether she could do that. Lilliam realized she had no ties to anyone which made her perfect for the job. She picked fights with people making bets for money on who would win. This got her some pocket money for food, but it was not enough to pay for lessons on how to fight and even kill. For some time she stumbled low in life. Lilliam became a prostitute. She made the money she needed for lessons, and soon she was an assassin. Between learning how to kill, killing, and being depressed Lilliam became resentful of the world and everyone in it. Lilliam enjoys killing people, but she would never admit that to anyone. Her tactics for killing are getting close to her targets using a childish, sunny, and even friendly persona. Then she poisons them or stabs them slightly in the back. She uses this persona to get close to people who are not her targets as well trying to work an image of a defenseless little girl into their head so that if she is ever in trouble or wants something she can't afford, etc.

>>43685103
What if a player asks you for help with their character's backstory?

>>43686735

Part 2

she has more of a chance of getting help. She rarely lets her innocent mask fall unless she is in battle. Truly her greatest weakness would be someone showing her love or affection that would bring her wall tumbling down and possibly leave her defenseless... that is if she trusts you. All Lilliam wants is acceptance which she never had in life. Her greatest aspects are her most obvious weaknesses. She is afraid of Law and Claire. Claire ho she was racist to because she thought it would help her fit in. Sometimes her ways of trying to gain trust and acceptance in her group will make life harder for her. She is uncomfortable around Brinn.

>>43686735
One line in and already what a piece of garbage.

>>43686749
>>43686735
That is fucking awful.

Holy shit.

>>43686650
The worst part is that it starts of okay and suckers you in.

If I was to find and print off a copy of My Immortal and hand that to my DM what would an appropriate response be?

>>43686735
Can you catch autism from reading? I think I may need to get myself checked.

>>43686814
Only from vaccines.

I know this because a discredited doctor who believes in the healing power of crystals told me so and Oprah said its true.

Not to be a hipster but I kinda like Metro and especially Metro Last Light's sorta backstory/chsracter motivation/plot spurring moment.

Metro you are just some kid who looks up to this ultrabadass and want to emulate him so you go on some dangerous as fuck mission. Which gets you tossed into some fuckhuge larger than life mission

Metro 2's first and second act are basically New Vegas' first act in the sense that you are trying to get revenge on some guy who crossed you. The difference being however that Pavel was a million times more unique than Benny. Then you end up getting tossed into some fuckhuge conspiracy

Still think it was mad retarded to make Artyom a silent protag though. Hate that video game shit

>>43686814
Check your family tree. You can only catch autism from that.
>>43686839
Har har har.

>>43686852
But my family tree is just a trunk.

>>43685145
>>43685053
NV wasn't done by Bethesda, morons

>>43686883
Then get off 4chan, Mr. Elephant.

How is a melee build in fo4

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>>43686883
I hope you mean by that that you don't have records going far back.

I hope you don't mean pic horrifically related.

>>43686909
About as viable as a melee build in any other game where guns do sensible amounts of damage: Fucking stupid.

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>>43685145
Honestly fallout 2 had my favorite story.
Go find a holy relic that will save our tribe, it is in vault 13, no we don't know where it is go ask some guy that sells us stuff he knows everything.

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>>43685388
>Giant buff guy with crude and overly masculine features softened by his elven heritage?
So basically, Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf.

>>43686627
When compared with F3 and F4, pretty much EVERYTHING looks like paragon of storyline, so what's your point, really?

>>43686959
My point is that NV ISN'T any better than 3 and 4.

>>43686097
Fights aren't short due to magical levels and raider drug addicts needing twenty headshots to die.

>>43686129
It's only limited because ^, I very easily got a thousand rounds of my chosen ammo before meeting a couple of these.

>>43685144
Tieflings aren't half. They have just a bit of demon or devil blood in them. Half-fiends are half demon/devil.

>>43687013
>Half-fiends are half demon/devil.
Or Cambion/Alu-demon, if your edition uses those.

>>43686937
Fallout 2 had the worst fucking writing out of all of them, even 3 (havent played 4).

Anybody who thinks 2 had good writing is almost certainly being a an elitist or nostalgiaglasses. It was so fucking bad, filled to the brim with pop culture references and 90s equivalent of proto-memery. It was honestly one of the worst examples of video game writing

"Slayer is a warrior born to kill, he knows no mercy"
What the fuck are you an edgy 12 years old kid trapped into the body of a man?

>>43687036
Anyone who think the Fallout series is supposed to be dead serious is a fucking idiot. FO1 had the goddamn TARDIS in it.

>>43687036
Yeah. I can understand why one would enjoy it, but "good" is pushing it too far. There just isn't good writing in vidya.

>>43687055
So did 40k back in the day.

Weird how these things turn out.

>>43687055
Just because it isn't serious doesn't mean it isn't bad.

>>43687071
Legacy of Kain was fair good.

>>43687089
It seemed to me that the criticism being leveled was 'it's not serious, therefore it's shit', which seems to be a fairly common position here.

>>43687117
No, the writing is fucking god awful. I can apperciate goofy, tongue in cheek satire, but when literally every fucking character is a pop culture reference and entire scenes of the main quest of the game serve to only pay off for a throwaway pop culture gag is shit only juvenile twats enjoy

Fucking hate Fallout 2 apologists.

>>43686985
But it is. Sure, it's like saying dry bread tastes better than shit, but hey - it's still an improvement over shit after all.

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>>43686811
Why would you even do that?

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>>43687036
Mate, you could at least try.

And if F2 is overfilled with references, you surely didn't played Fallout 1. Or Tactics. Or F3, for that matters.

Go bait somewhere else.

>Talks about nostalgia googles
>Wears one with 1m thick glass

>>43687036
You mean like 4 dropping shitloads of lovecraft references?
Or the aliens being a full dlc in 3?
Yeah much better stories for sure.
I am going to go out into the wastes and find my dad...
I am going to go find my son who was kidnappened....
Much better stories then I am going to go find something to save my village, so much better, I see the error of my ways.
Yeah you have a shit opinion.

>>43687158
Because.

>>43687136
Fucking hate stupid idiots who bash Fallout 2, because it dares to not be a boring paste made of trite with absolutely no flavour.

It's like you wear some special kind of nostalgia glasses, jumping on things that aren't even there in the game. Or like you've played Fallout 2 for the first time somewhere around 2012. That would explain why you are so jaded by a 90s game made with 90s ideas and 90s style.
God forbit if something is different than your own personal preferences, and even worse if it's a textbook period piece.

>>43687136
I'm sorry but you talk like a fag and your shit is all retarded.

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>>43687169

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>>43686348

>>43685250
>Doesn't know that Old West postmen were actually badass fuckers partially responsible for the term "riding shotgun"
It's almost as if delivering valuables across miles of dangerous irradiated Wasteland filled with man-eating monsters, slavers, malfunctioning robots and bandits would require a badass capable of handling those threats or something.

>>43687185
>Serious means boring and none of that flavour everyone always complains about.

>>43686400
I realize this reply is late but I did go on to say why I thought it was fun.
>>43687004
I have run into about five dudes total with the skulls and a random mister gutsy gave me more trouble than all of them put together.

>>43686491
Because "he was the King and Kings can buy anything."

Needless to say I stopped DM'ing for that group shortly thereafter.

>>43684918
I once played this Brujah in a game set in the modern nights.
His sotyr was that he was actually from Vampire Dark Ages, then he got staked, then he got unstaked in the moder nights (no explanation as to how both those things happened) and was now a modern philosopher-knight on a motorcycle carrying a greatsword under his leather trenchcoat.

>>43686937
I honestly forgot why the chosen one was doing shit.

>>43685549
Nice greentext, also compared to FO4 they were masterworks.

>>43685282

Fallout 3 would have been better if Liam Neeson worked with the Enclave and the story became one of trying to figure out who deserves to help Project Purity more, the Brotherhood or Enclave.

Because holy shit like half the problems in that game would've been solved if Liam didn't go bonkers when the US Government came along and offered to aid the good doctor in fixing up the purifier.

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Time to see if a backstory for a character I haven't played is shit or not.

>Mother was a village witch, his father is unknown and thought to be a traveling merchant
>Local village finds out about witchery and heretical practices and burns her at the stake
>as a boy he is left alive and treated as a local pariah
>Eye gets gouged out one day from bullying going too far
>He harbors no ill intent whatsoever, understanding this is how people act
>Secludes himself in his mother's secret study, learning about different heretical things
>As he grows older he decides to try and fit in and become the mortician of the village, someone has to do it
>In actuality he runs experiments on the bodies using alchemy since no one but him will ever know
>Once he becomes well-versed enough he packs his things, burns the cottage down and leaves in search for more knowledge

Is this too far in the realm of edge/special snowflakery?

>>43685462
Remember how even unarmed super mutants kicked your ass unless you were using endgame gear in the first Fallout? Or how some quests in Fallout 1 and 2 had completely different solutions based on your intelligence score? Remember how you mission actually did matter, and if you farted around too long rather than fix the problem people told you was urgent, you would get a different conclusion to the quest?

Look, I get that games have to be made differently these days, but they could at least try to preserve some of the cool shit. VtM Bloodlines was a horribly buggy piece of shit with pretty horrible mechanics, but we still remember it fondly because it was an honest to goodness RPG where you were encouraged to roleplay and have fun with the game. I like streamlining when it makes a game more fun to play. Streamlining to make a game easy to get through is just dumb. That's what difficulty settings are for.

>>43687370
Personally I rather liked Fallout: Tactics storyline. Which is odd considering it was combat game first and foremost.

>>43685249

WTF does Stephanie Meyers have to do with it? She doesn't write about demons.

>>43687367
It's not that hard, first game, water(chip), second game, food(fertile land really), third game, water(purifier), forth game ruins it though with bitches kidnapping your kid.

>>43687380
Fallout 3 would have been better if you started as a convict in the ncr. And ended with murdering a mad scientist.

>>43687185
Different anon here.

Played F2 for first time in 2012, fucking loved it. Thought the writing to be a strong point.

Played F3 earlier in 2015, bored out of my mind. Went to Stalker instead.

I may be lacking rose tinted glasses as far as this is concerned, but I find F3 kiddos have the thickest pair.

>>43687392

Why would someone get burned for being the witch when magic and shit are things that actually happen?

Why would a bullied, angry child just *not care* when he gets bullied and *loses a fucking eye?*

Why did he just roll with it and, when the time was right, burn down his own home and leave?

Want my opinion? His mother never died, the boy gouged out his own eye to gain foresight (like Odin, maybe you can tie eye-gouging with witch powers) and the cottage, and his mother, is still there.

>>43687405
>tfw you reached the tank
>tfw you were too stupid to figure out how to get into it
>>43687422
Ahh they wanted a GECK that was it. I just remembered the old lady telling you to do thing.

>>43687404
>>43685462
Getting said endgame gear is trivial in FO2 as well. In FO2 you can just walk into a base to take it, FFS.

Also not sure why people are ragging on FO3 super mutants -- had to just shoot one over and over again while it was trapped in a house until I used up all my ammo to finish it off. Shits were terrors. Guess I didn't optimize like some people.

>>43687435
>Why would someone get burned for being the witch when magic and shit are things that actually happen?

Makes a lot more sense than burning someone for witchcraft when magic isn't real.

>>43687416
Sparkle fairy seemed pretty demonic.

>Old man in a kids body
>Goes to school to pick up underage chicks
>Sneaks into their houses to watch them sleep
>Manipulative
>Predatory

There was other shit but its been a while since I was forced to watch those films. Never read the books.

"He's like Harvey Birdman, but black."

Which, in retrospect and compared to the other backgrounds I got, was pretty alright.

Runner-up annoyed the shit out of me but loses marks because everyone has a That Guy like this. The character wielded epic-level magic in his backstory and was a specially-chosen by the high priest to be their student and then for 'mysterious reasons and intrigue' didn't, except there was some spooky 'alter-ego' who he would make appear pretty much whenever he wanted who could do anything because magic, like brush aside a powerful curse like it was nothing or piggy-back the injured fighter who was 3 times his size (but no, without casting anthaul - he could 'just do it' apparently).

Stats (standard D&D statblock) also didn't align with how the character was roleplayed (wizard with 8 STR who apparently had hot abs, 10 CHA yet took it upon himself to be the party face and sweet-talk everyone with a silver tongue). He was also a total fucking blowhard with 'expert' knowledge of sorcery and had erudite knowledge of 'most things' as a level 1 pathfinder character, butting in on everything from the Cleric trying to tell us about an obscure religion to the Druid explaining some natural phenomenon. I wasn't GM for that game and can't fathom what the GM was actually thinking in allowing it, but the other players pretty much unanimously felt it was pure wish-fulfillment bullshit and it's exact reason why I now limit backgrounds to 2 pages max.

>>43687435
Non approved magic. She could be the reason you cant get your dick up anymore. You don't know you're just joe peasant.
And some people are just submissive.

>>43687458

Ok, but that's not sexying up a demon, that's demoning up a vampire.

>>43687433

Fallout 3 was my introduction to the series and I just couldn't bring myself to go beyond the first city. I was playing it with a friend and he literally fell asleep. The color palette was the most atrocious thing ever and the story had more holes than a golf course

Years later I played FO1 and I absolutely loved everything about it.

The only people who loved FO3 are the ones who don't know a thing about videogames

>>43687480
Other than the diet there wasn't anything to indicate that they were actually vampires.

>>43685012
I just picked 1 int and 9 str and end and started tear assing through the commonwealth with a machete going "muh baby" at anyone who will listen.

>>43687392
Meh, not that bad. Not that interesting but not horrible.
>>43687435
Well people who are victimized often tend to think of things as either their own fault, or that that's just how things are. Largely because they can't do anything about it anyway. As for the house, I would think destroying evidence of his necromancy or whatever would be easier with fire than carefully sorting through everything.

>>43687435
Probably should've prefaced with the fact my group doesn't use DnD ever, and so we're generally playing with different systems and more or less settings with a stigma attached to magic.

Secondly, the intent was that the mother was a heretic in the same way as you wouldn't be comfortable learning she's the kind of witch to make human sacrifices to her evil patron/god/demon/etc.

I do like the idea about ripping out his own eye for insight though.

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>>43687435
You know what would be even better? He gouged out the eye to gain foresight, but did it wrong and now he only has one eye and no foresight. I mean he only had whatever books his mother left behind to go on and maybe that wasn't enough. Or maybe it just wasn't as easy to do it right for some orphan piece of shit with little experience.

>>43687487
Eh, to me, the odd one out was FO2, not FO3. FO2 seemed more like a random fan made mod of FO1 than a professional product.

>Master flesh goop used as brahmin poop LOL
>random encounter as forum trolls spouting memes
>tons and tons of witty joke encounters like Star Trek and a whale and Monty Python that you will get all of even in a relatively speedy game that is played on minimum Luck
>power armor superior to Brotherhood armor that you get just by dropping in
>the shaman is an honest to god wizard
>there is an honest to god super mutant wizard that can Summon Deathclaw
>there is an honest to god ghost
>lol you can kill him if you use a mutant toe on him!
>ghouls are being unjustly persecuted for some reason and they don't randomly attack you anymore
>the US government is evil and wants to kill you because you're supposedly a mutant but the real mutant is the end boss that works for them, and you have to blow up their base to save your tribe from the gubmint, wow much deep

>>43687557
Or he gouged his eye out for foresight, did it right, but the only vision he got was he would regret gouging his eye out.
then lied to cover up his embarrassment.

>>43687445
In Fallout 3, super mutants are mid-game enemies that show up as soon as you start farting around in the subway. They can be taken down with a hunting rifle, easy as fuck. And I know that, because I fucking rushed through that game (I even accidentally skipped an entire questline by finding the tanker before Three Dog) and didn't power level. If anything I was underlevelled for most of the game.

The issue with FO3 super mutants isn't even the fact they're weaksauce. It's that they're just nothing. You get a handwave explanation as to why they're in DC when FO1 and 2 make it fairly obvious they really shouldn't be, they serve almost no story purpose, and just act as generic fodder enemies that had to be in there because Bethesda didn't have any original ideas and just went back to the well by bringing back the super mutants and Enclave, which makes absolutely zero sense. In New Vegas, at least they have a storyline and a purpose, memorable characters, a town, and a lot of stuff that justified them being in the game beyond fanservice.

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>>43687580
Oh god yes

>>43687574
>lol you can kill him if you use a mutant toe on him!
Mother fucker I wish I knew that. Magic has been sort of there for a while though. 4 has a lady who can see the future with drugs and 3 had an imaginary ghost bear that would fuck you up.

>>43687502

Well yeah, people do randomly add and subtract shit to vampires to make their take on vampires cooler, like the way Anne Rice shat up vampires.

>>43687626
"See's the future"

>>43687643
She saw that fucking deathclaw coming.

>>43687626
Psykers have been in since 1. The Master had a menagerie of them.

>>43687656
Totally forgot about psychic powers.

>>43687626
Also psychics have existed since fallout 1 and have been in every fallout in some form or another.

>>43687392
>Eye gets gouged out one day from bullying going too far
make it a rock thrown too hard, improper care leading to infection
>village doctor actually has a conscience and amputates the eye before it kills him
>villagers start freaking out, fearing retribution, but he forgives them
>he honestly harbors no ill intent whatsoever, understanding this is how people act, and he would prefer to have a job when he grows older

....technically less edgy, but this would seriously result in a magnitude more amount of pain.

>>43687686
Hell, they've been toned down since. I suppose electrokinetic raiders would rapidly being every player's worst nightmare.

>>43687581
Its not exactly clear why there wouldn't be super mutants all over the fucking place. The world still looking post apocalyptic and with concrete buildings still standing (let alone computers etc) 200 years later is retarded, but 200 years is more than enough time to give super mutants to have a population explosion all over the country. Afterall, in FO2 Marcus tells us that they become fertile again about 10-20 years after being dipped.

>>43687686
Did 3 and New Vegas really have any? I don't remember any in 3, and well I didn't have wild wasteland on in Vegas, so I imagine I might have had them removed by that.

>>43687392
Lemme try this. Meant for en EP game.
>station dwelling neckbrinker has too much time
>creates an AGI to act as AI for his space vidya
>AGI knows fuck all outside of shootan gaems
>operator as fuck but is 12 and what is this
>neckbrinker is murdered and his backups deleted
>AGI uploads self into left over body
>finds murdered neckbro
>must be TDM with no respawns
>and an unknown opponent has the lead
>sets out to win so neckbro can respawn

>>43687710
I definitely like this, I hadn't decided on how exactly he would lose the eye aside from the "bullying" idea so a rock thrown too hard would be perfect. Thanks anon.

>>43687729
>Professor Calvert - one of the residents of Point Lookout, he achieved psionic powers after an experimental procedure. When his brain was extracted from his body (in the same fashion as for robobrain models) and put into a jar, he gained an ability to communicate with people all around the region by entering their minds. To a person, it appeared like a mysterious voice in their head.
>Bloomseer Poplar - is one of the members of the Treeminders and can predict one's future. She describes the settings of some of the major quests that can be done like The Superhuman Gambit; "I see a battle between insects and industry, and the men who control them..."
>The AntAgonizer - appears to have some sort of psychic control over giant ants. It started when she was a child and her parents were killed by ants but she was spared. Later she gained control over them and used them to harass the townspeople.
>Harold - FEV-mutant with a strange connection to Bob the tree growing from his head.

>The Forecaster is a child who can see into the future, but can't control his powers. He needs his "medicine" to keep him from over-thinking, thus helping control his headaches. For 100 caps, though, he will forgo his medication and look into the future for the Courier.
>Nightkin inside Black Rock cave seem to have some paranormal knowledge of events and characters, if having completed the quest Crazy, Crazy, Crazy by repairing Rhonda they will tell the "voices" said things that will happen in the main storyline, as well as special comments about the companions, e.g. upon bringing Craig Boone as a companion, they will comment "silent man knows more about the spiked crowns than what he says" referring that Boone knows more about the Great Khans than what he says (the Bitter Springs Incident).

Also the Ghost of She might indicate something to do with White Bird and maybe the Courier(?)
Hell, Animal Friend might be telekinesis.

>>43687731
That sounds fun.

>>43687626
>Magic has been sort of there for a while though. 4

Well yeah, after FO2.

FO1 has psykers (and called such iirc), but they're mad mind thralls of The Master, with a fairly specific set of powers -- so I didn't mind that. I would have greatly preferred if FO2 was going for something remotely atmospheric with its wizards instead of just The Power of Randumb.