/heem/ - Snek edition

First for Ngannou

>>77441583
Could Mini Pettis drag midget division out of the abyss of low viewership if he became the champion ?

>>77441647
No, he's a manlet. See here LeaveMightyMouseToMe.jpg

>>77441647
He has the charisma of a shoe

>>77441586
how is she still relevant

Bulgaria said Rumble Johnson has the heart of a rabbit, is this true?

>>77441659
McGregor is a manlet too yet he's the most popular guy. Faber/Cruz/Garbage are all relatively popular manlets too

>>77441687
Conair, is at the manlet cutoff

>>77441695
bawahaha, manlet detected

>>77441687
Anything over 5"4 is non manlet

5"5' masterace feels good man

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Anon I...

>>77441721

it wasn't funny the first time

>>77441687
Funny that half of conor's insults are about height, for someone that is 5'9 that is ridiculous.

Obviously short man syndrome .

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Floyd is getting knocked da fook out!!

>>77441786

Look at thos angles

Never before seen

Are Shaub fans gay?

Shaub carries himself like a homosexual man.

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>>77441786

How will Floyd even survive a round?

>>77441786
>little man
Does he know that he's 5'9"?

>>77441586
>>77441667
Fuck that capuchin-monkey-faced attention whore cunt.

>>77441800
I consider myself an ardent fan of Brendan but I am not gay.

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>>77441813
The madman. Im outakwarded and Im not even in the ring with him

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>>77441786
>mfw conor heems floyd with a slam dunk spinning jumping double hammerfist

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>>77441702
>>77441716

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LOOK IN MY EYES

WHAT DO YOU SEE?

>>77441800
>posts a shirtless selfie for a bunch of dudes
I think you'd be surprised

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>>77441846
THE CULT OF SUCCENALITY

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>>77441813
>>77441813
*gallops towards you*

Who is your favorite woman's MMA fighter?

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>>77441716
Uhm sweetie....

>>77441859

CM Punk predicted how Conor would beat Floyd

@1:47
https://twitter.com/RichEisenShow/status/892852537820274688/video/1

H8rs btfo again?

what is the best fight of 2017?

>>77441895
You assume that posting takes up much time, why ? Just checking once in half an hour if there's some (you)s, some interesting discussion doesn't take up much time buddeh

>>77441904

mma angles comfirmed

Bet the house on Conor

What is the best MMA website?

>>77441926
Heem.tk
Bjpenn.com
Markhunt.tv

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>>77441904
If anyone other than Schaub (such as Masvidal) spoke about MMA angles giving pro boxers trouble, nobody would care or criticize him to the extent /heem/ has.

>>77441915
wow i saw your post at 8 this morning and it's still you on here at 5 PM holy crap, it's just one polish guy spamming joanna pics!

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hello

unironically mma.reddit.com

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have you wished Nick Diaz happy birthday yet?

>>77441962
Awful

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>>77441962
happy birthday hick

>>77441962
No RAW and Smackdown?

>>77441872
Imagine if Conor gallops towards getting slept immediately

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Who is the most based UFC fighter?

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>>77441962
>he took time to make this

>a whole month without UFC events after this weekend

great

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>>77441721
>>77441846
>>77441854

JUST

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???

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>>77441992

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>every time

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>>77441829
You don't have to like UFC strawweight contender Paige VanZant but you must respect her.

>>77441813
Holy shit I didn't think he had a single chance but I get it now.
Schaub was right.

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>>77441904

Jones is officially the GOAT since Saturday.

>>77441962
I don't use your calendars anyway, but honest opinion this new style is hard to look at.

>sports AND entertainment


what did he mean by this?

>>77442041
yeah, i dont know how to into colors so its a bit of a challenge. im honestly just throwing shit at a wall and seeing if it works. there's always the regular heeminder

>>77441962
There definitely is such a thing as having "too much free time"

>>77441962
Nice job in implementing some of the feedback but really it's just convoluted for no reason.
Simplicity is key and how you had it before was better.
This is an extreme, I can't actually use it to follow events because you've shoved far too much on there that the actual important information is buried in it all.

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>>77442040
He was the GOAT long before that doubter

>>77442040
Not until he beats the Natty King Michael Bisping

>>77441998
I was going to buy Fight Pass but then I realised this and figured I might as well wait. Next PPV is 215 too and I'm not exactly expecting that to have kickass prelims

>>77441962
Literally why should I care about a fighter's birthday whats wrong with you?

>>77441962
Way too congested, back to the drawing board.

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Is Bisping vs. GSP headlining NYC card

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>>77442070

Jones vs DC II was a really good fight

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>>77442092
Who has the belt right now?

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>its raining

>>77442092
what a patriot

>>77442068
It was debatable, now it isn't anymore.

>>77442115
Whittaker. Remember, Bisping gave it to him at 213.

>>77442115
Hendo won the fight
Bisping won the decision

Would love to see Bisping move back up to LHW for a super fight with Jon after he heems GSP.

>>77442092
both live in california, so neither of them are american

>>77441819
He genuinely has short man syndrome. Look at how he walks, like he has a coat hanger in his shirt.

>>77441911
AJ vs Wlad

>>77441911
Gaychi vs Johnson

>>77442139
>retiring as undefeated MW and LHW champ

I like it

>tfw Bisping beats silva, GSP and Jones

>>77441911
DC vs Jones :)

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>>77441829

Jesus the commentarynwas biased at 214

I can deal wih racism, fascism, homophobia and any other form hate speach, butmaking fun of DC is too much. Please stops it guise.

>>77442151
California was frontier farm country and as americana as it gets before the cia turned the cities into commie shitholes, underagefag

>>77442233
>was

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>No fighter in UFC history has defended the heavy weight belt more than two times

Really makes you think

>>77442260
literally the best looking fighter

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>>77441813
bet the house on conor

>>77442014
wat

>>77441786

>still no video footage

LMAO he has no chance

/r/ing images of Luke Thomas getting btfo or saying dumb shit

Couldn't help but notice how incredibly flimsy all the fight apparel has looked since the Reebok deal. Especially the compression tights that Robbie and DC wear.

Is the quality actually shit or does it just LOOK shit?

Serious question

Mighty Mouse vs Cyborg

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>>77442349
you are a faggot

>>77442356
mighty mouse literally free money

How long is the Reebok deal for

>>77442349
all reebok shit is flimsy and terrible, that's why it's so annoying, i can't understand why you wouldn't make something that doesn't look cheap as fuck at least once. they honestly shouldn't be allowed to do business if they don't start making decent clothing.

Sure, Jones has beaten Machida, Rampage, Rashad, Shogun, D.C., Gus, and Vitor on TRT

But has ever faced a beast like Chris cariaso or john moraga? Sorry, but DJ is still the goat.

>>77442379
DJ beat the Gooch, that makes him GOAT by default.

>>77442364
Okay let's make it harder.

John Moraga is ranked #10 in Flyweight.

I just want a fight between a man and a woman, what would the handicap have to be to even the playing field?

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>I hope you no heart, the hangs no hurt
https://streamable.com/wkbx3

https://twitter.com/BrendanSchaub/status/892864385076662273/video/1

H8rs ignore this post, it will send you into shambles.

>>77442092
>Xtreme Yogurt

lol what

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>>77442413
Wow great turn out in London.

>>77442393
well you'll have to start by not picking literally the best flyweights in the world

What's Schaub's comedy like?

Do you have to know him as a UFC guy or does he cover other topics?

I get the feeling most people who watch Rogan know him from his UFC background, and he jokes about a lot of fighting related topics. Is Schuab like this?

Anyone have webm compilation of Schaub getting heem'd?

>>77442441
>What's Schaub's comedy like?
just quotes from adam sandler movies and one liners about getting your dick sucked

>>77442441
Don't need to be a UFC fan per se but his comedy involves stories about being a fighter and you won't appreciate all the references if you aren't familiar with the sport.

>>77442378
to maximize profits
that's why the manufacturer it in fucking indonesia and china

Heeminder that if you're not fastidiously using EVERY product and service that sponsors your boy after the Reebok deal ends you are not a true fight fan, rather you are casual scum that needs to hang themselves pronto.

>>77442378
adidas just bought them to eliminate the competition they don't give a fuck about reebok

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This guy = Jewish supremacist.

https://youtu.be/2Yr-W0e3LSY

>this is considered comedy in America

>>77442400
Isn't it funny how all these years later that's exactly how the fight went

>>77442487
he makes decent points tho

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>>77442492
this is the finest form of art of all time

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Guy's a girl message me on Tinder for the first time and I'm having a panic attack. I don't know what to do

>having an english accent in america makes people add 20 points to your IQ

so can if i tell chicks i have an IQ of 110 they'll believe me? mine is 90

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>>77442492
the power of trt

>>77442527
Invite her over to watch the Machida fight loool

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Should I continue working on this or delete?

>if you show hespect... you don't lose your teeth
>in brazeew we say that

>>77441846
A fatter version of Floyd Mayweather's permanent new expression come month end?

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>>77442538

>>77442501
visit drudgereport.com now

>>77442558
French people hate immigrants, sticking them in montreal is the first sign they will be sent back

>>77442551

I wanted to make a more realistic version but wasn't sure if it was worth the time since Poland's version already gets the point across

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god put a smiiiiile on my face, god put this smile on my face

>>77442604
>at least his mom died.jpg

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>>77442703

so the tyrone race baiter is also the spammer

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>You're stepping into the octagon and pic related is your ref

What do?

http://mmajunkie.com/2017/08/tyron-woodley-has-positive-chat-with-dana-white-was-probably-not-going-to-leak-info

Pathetic

>>77442732
the Petties bros are as dull as a butter knife. There's a reason not so ugly tony's fights don't sell.

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Alright, which one of you fucks is this?

Even put in the Undertaker team in the background to troll /asp/

forgot the vid, i'm a retard

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9pNrFqK30w

>>77441943
Yes we would. But no one else with any credibility as an analyst is saying it because they aren't retarded

>>77442747
tell my opponent i won't heem him too bad

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>this is a wmma fighter

Dana needs to stop signing fugly hues and get a few tittymonsters to wrestlefuck in the octagon.

>>77442759
Idiot
>>77442779
That's me

>>77442787
It doesn't matter if they're pretty, if they fight like Roxxa Moddaferri, besides having mostly uggos makes the average looking ones pop out

>>77442787
Post a pic of her doing mma

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>>77442787
>tfw you will never be in her guard

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>>77442804

She could heem you while wearing a dress and high heels.

>>77442764
>be Tyron
>have 2 shit fights in a row
>throw a hissy fit for being called out
>publicly threaten Dana fucking White
>receive 1 phone call
>backdown immediately

this dumb douchebag actually thought he was gonna put the screws to Dana.

>>77442812
I wanna see how she looks with no make up

>>77442861
like every woman: not as good as i do

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>>77442861

Why would you wanna see that?

Girls don't look good in MMA gear, no makeup and cornrows.

>>77442924
Wow croatia isn't spamming nude niggers today what a refreshing surprise

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>>77442924
I don't know what I was expecting but this is comical

>>77442967
Would you eat Joanna's taco, Poland?

>>77442944

I never post nude.

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>>77442924

>>77442976
he's obsessed with her and a jobless zilch he would do anything for her

>>77442992
Only one obsessed here is you

>>77442982
I only post here when I'm nude.

list organizations whose fights you refuse to watch:

bellator
rizin
one
lfa

>>77443052
Why

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>>77443052

>>77443059
I like ultimate fighting, not bums in a cage. Definitely not bums in a ring.

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>>77443028

Same.

Only post from home and I'm nude at home.

>>77443069
filtered

>>77443082
this lad is light on his feet but he fell for meme kicks

>>77443091
Sorry you missed Campos vs Girtz 3. Fucking loser.

>>77443074
guess ya ain't a fight fan

>>77443101
I'm an ULTIMATE fight fan you nerd.

>>77443074
Ya can't be my friend!

>>77443082
whats with the kids walking out of the door at the end? How rampant is autism in this school?

>>77443082
>wonderboy vs. tyron

>>77443121
le autism meme
shut the fuck up before i shut you the fuck up

History of Tyrone: A ufc perspective.
>Beats the ghost of Koschek
>Condit BTFOs himself.
>Ktfo'd by Rory.
>Beats Dong and Fridgeman.
>Cries for a year while sitting on the bench.
>Constantly talks about how the ufc isn't based on merit and that he should get a title shot because he earned it.
>Gets a title shot against Lawler and finishes him.
>Starts crying about money fights and asks for GSP/Nick Diaz.
>Fights Stephen Thompson to a draw.
>Cries about moneyfights and not needing to rematch a draw.
>Says fans are racist when they say he should rematch.
>Rematches Thompson and wins.
>Claims fans are racist for reasons such as booing.
>Claims fans hate black fighters universally despite the presence of Skinny Bone Jones, Anderson, Rampage, Rashad, Cornbread Cormier, Mighty Mouse as hardcore fan favourites.
>Cries about moneyfights.
>Claims Damien Maia doesn't deserve the title fight despite having earned it (the whole merit thing he complained about gets thrown back in his face)
>Fights Damien Maia on a short turnaround for Maia.
>He (Damien) has his eye swollen shut from the first punch.
>He (Tyrone) avoids the takedowns but refuses to initiate and wins the fight.
>Manage to get less than half the current total strikes thrown in a title fight ever.
>Boo'd out of the area.
>Demands a money fight with GSP.
>BTFO'd by Dana at the postfight presser.
>BTFO'd by Micheal Bisping at the postfight on FOX.
>Claims he'll leak information.
>Backs down a day later.
>Claims he's the GOAT "by default" as if your resume disappears once you retire.

>>77443155
Do it.

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>muh labrum
what a lying nigger.

>>77443165
>Lies about a serious injury in order to excuse his poor performance.
I'll add that to my list.

>>77443165
>>77443186
His coaches probably told him to day that to cover his ass tbqh

>>77443165
>>77443186
It was just a prank bros

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Why is Showtime/Boxing promoters such filthy kikes? Like I had no idea. Unless you live in America you get zero access to any official promotional material, even on youtube.

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>>77443136
>wonderboy vs. tyron

>>77443165
https://www.mmafighting.com/2017/8/2/16087398/tyron-woodleys-medical-suspension-extended-to-180-days-due-to-shoulder-injury

Got extended. Don't know enough about the whole medical suspensions deal to say if you can just tell them you have an injury and they'll buy it

>>77441813
Paulie was eternally shook.

Conor Bless.

>>77443206
Just proxy on if you really want to watch it.
>Delete UFC cookies
>Turn on proxy
>Sign in
>Load stream
>Turn off proxy

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name my fight team

>>77442492

His stand up is garbage, he's funny on his podcast though.

>>77443232
I've already seen it from a non official source on youtube, but just the length that showtime goes to block it from people outside the US. It's ridiculous.

>>77443234
alpha fail

>>77443234
The Goonies

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>>77443234
>PVZ

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Realistically, who can stop /myboy/ now?

>>77443234

Ugly manlets

>>77443218
how the fuck does that work

he said his shoulder was literally popping out from the 1st round

but he didn't bring it up with the CSAC doctor?

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Is he gonna be ok?

Bisping just confirmed on UFC tonight he is fighting GSP nov4 at msg. Not sure if he's right though because Schaub said his sources indicated it won't be at msg.

>>77443311
>Schaub said his sources

Technically, the source of a shit is just an intestine

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Fuck, GSP vs Bisping makes me ill.

Do people really want to watch that?

>>77443311
anyone with a brain would know both gsp and jon will be on that card

>>77443329
it's just memes m8

>>77443297
>"You're fine."
>"N-no doc it's really sore and I can barely move it see ;_;"
>"Fine faggot take the 180 days."
Hopefully we get a Interim title.

>>77443156

>Ktfo'd by Rory.

Lel. Rory wishes he could finish half-decent fighters.

>>77443297
Woodley maybe didn't want to be officially suspended?

>>77443342
he said he knew exactly what it was when it happened in the fight, he should have just fucking said sorry about the performance everyone i injured myself in the 1st round and then a doctor would confirm it, instead he made a complete ass of himself lol

>>77443297
The article says they extended it "upon receiving more information"
It kind of sounds like he just told them

is Max Holloway better P4P than Tyron Woodley?

>>77443121

What is clear about the kids at the end is that they are clearly clones (thus the identical dress code). What isn't known is what exactly the red shoes on the first clone to walk into frame mean.

For some, there is a belief that they indicate a higher rank amongst the clone people, perhaps he is some kind of officer (thus the way he leads and the other two follow him in a hurried fashion). If true, the presence of a undocumented clone army operating in an organised and hierarchal manner is of course, a great concern not just to the students at this school, but to the world as a whole.

Alternatively, some theorise that "Red Shoes" could have originally been patient zero in the cloning facility, and is attempting a daring escape while the nightmarish clone zombies pursue him through the school halls, partially caught on camera in the webm. If true, we must make it our life's work to find this man and bring him to safety, for he may provide valuable information as to how we can destroy the clone menace he unwittingly helped to create.

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>>77443460

https://www.tmz.com/2017/08/02/floyd-mayweather-300-million-mcgregor-fight/

imagine how dumb you have to be to pay for this ''''''''''''''''''''''''''''fight'''''''''''''''''''''''''''

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>>77441583
>tfw someone uses my pic for OP

made my day t.b.h.

>>77443483
"I mean, am I the highest-paid athlete out there? And just coming back? We not talking about no contract. We not talking about no contract for no 4 years, or no contract for no 5 years. I can do it in 36 minutes. $300 (million) or better. In 36 minutes."

Not a bad deal.

As for Conor, the UFC fighter is expecting to rake in around $100 mil for the August 26 superfight -- but it'll be largest payday an MMA fighter has ever made ... so he's not complaining either.

>>77443483
>tmz

That's old news. Depending on PPV buys Floyd can make 300, Conor can make 200.

>>77443490
stay on reddit

>>77443234

manlet tryhards

>>77442604
good Jones walkout song reference

that album was fire back in the day

>>77443506
just confirmed by drudge report i don't read fake news

>>77442852
big bank take little bank

>>77443518
>was fire
literally cringed

>>77443340
actually more embarrassing that Rory was able to clown on him the entire fight,

blew him the F out on the feet then took him down and pounded on him

How do the h8rs explain Schaub's continued success? I'm genuinely curious.

Fallon Fox vs Cyborg

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>>77443514
no u

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>>77443534

>>77443546

Rory's got no power m8. He is and forever will be GSP-lite and is welcome to Lellator now that the real deal is back.

Was Kelvin just too small/fat for 185? How did Chris "Just" Weidman look so good against him? Weidman was even outstriking him in the third round even before the takedowns.

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>>77443534
cool post bro

>>77443574
and what? he still clowned on woodley from bell to bell

Did Nelson download the data way too fast when he fought Brandon?

>>77443593
rory also lost to lawler wonderboy and condit lmao

rory is old news his career is over now that he's in bellator

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can someone give me a quick rundown?

>>77443581
It was a bad match up for Kelvin but it was still very close

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Why is the UFC slowly becoming more and more like WWE?

>>77443659
It wasn't close though, that's my point.

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Is this the natty limit?

>>77443665

People want freakshow circus fights and at the end of the day all businesses want to make money.

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Who do I believe?
https://youtu.be/QS-NT1bsF9Q
https://youtu.be/QS-NT1bsF9Q

>>77443646
Is Tyron Woodley possibly related to a king?

>>77441716
agreed and anyone over 5'9 is a hideous lanky nephilim

>>77443665
because people are paying $90,000 a seat to watch mcgregor box lol

has the autism revved down?

>>77441813
they had to get a ref to protect conor from getting heemed in sparring lmao

>>77443679
For white people yes.

Tyron is natty.

>>77443581
Weidman isn't shit, people are too quick to judge fighters completely off their last performance.
That's not it. Weidman is a very good Middleweight and he went up against an undersized Middleweight. Tim Kennedy was keeping Gastelum contained, you're daft if you didn't think Weidman was going to win

>>77443686
YES LADS. 217 could be great, isn't Cody supposed to be back then or something?
>217
Shit. 215 is Mighty Mouse, who's 216 again?

Mousasi

>>77443740
Stipe vs Cain

>>77443762
That's legit? Wew
I like the fight, don't really think Cain deserves the title shot but I'll take it.

>>77443765
The championship actually looks pretty cool, but who's that holding it?

>>77443765
haahahahahahaha where is now

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>>77443740

>>77443765
Retarded tattoo, but it is very well done.

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would you, heem?

>>77443792
I was thinking this, that belt looks stupidly well done to the point it looks shooped

217
Schaub vs Stipe
GSP vs Bisping
Holloway vs Edgar
Garbrant vs Dillashaw
Gastelum vs Masvidal

>>77443799
>those shoulders
can't believe she is ducking roidborg

>>77443806
All tattoos are retarded

>>77443816
lol

Why does Flyweight exist?

>>77443849
reddit

>>77443849
there are already like 7 midget reality shows

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>>77443765
you know its funny because one day in the future (assuming she doesn't kill herself) ronda is gonna make a cameo in a popular movie or appear in something and your kids are gonna ask who she is. What would you tell them?

>>77443835
Jon Jones vs Stipe
and thats a great card

>>77443865
Schaub is the bigger name though, and quite frankly the more talented fighter.

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>>77443816
y does bigg ladd make you so mad?

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>>77443825
this is your chance

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>>77443878

>>77443886
What angle should I approach him with my guy?

>>77443886
It must be nice to land in a country knowing you're unironically the best fighter in it.

>>77443863

She'll be going to WWE soon along with Shayna, so maybe she'll be able to stay relevant for a bit longer.

>>77443880
I actually think ladd is attractive. the filename wasn't my intention when first I came across the picture desu. Post more ladd

>>77443901
no disrespect to Bisping, but all British fighters are bums

can someone post tito meme face please

>>77443906
i don't know the exact details but i think she just did something here in florida for the WWE, at an event last month

>>77443727
White people are unironically able to grow more lean muscle mass than black people, though

Is there really no good cards or even fights this month?

>>77443922
heh schaub left bisping in california to fly to london

>>77443931

I think she might be factored in to the whole Jones/Lesnar deal honestly. Makes sense for UFC to let her go and in exchange get one last Brock money fight.

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>>77443935
you tell me

>>77443935
It's all about MayGoobs so they just sort of cleared it.

Honestly even this weekends card, I couldn't tell you who's on it outside of Pettis/Moreno

>>77443935
Normies are going to buy MayMac this month.

>>77441962
I like it, better use of space and no shitty podcasts. MMA is a weekend sport.

You now remember the dean of mean Keith Jardene

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>>77443933
100% my man

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Who is the best fighter living in California? No pound for pound bullshit.

>>77443981
HOUSTON ALEXANDER IS FOR REAL

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>>77443986

>>77443947
>>77443950
>>77443955
jesus christ

>>77443935
>everything shut down for the gooby fight
>215 is a midget card
just end it, flush this sport down the drain

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>>77443923

>>77444009
September won't be any better, but UFC is still holding a PPV.

And it's really funny because Mighty Mouse is known for doing shit numbers, and they put him as headliner on a show they know people aren't going to buy.

>>77443984
There's a reason overoid is one of the few heavyweights of dark complexion you fucking cuck

>>77441962
make the days go in order you stupid nigger.

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>>77443986
bas rutten

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>>77444036
they do

>>77444027
why doesn't the UFC get rid of the flyweight division

its weird how they add all these midget divisions but have huge gasp after 155 and upward

I'd kill for a 195 division over a 125 division or whatever bullshit those manlets fight at

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>>77444030
australia really doesn't know anything

Daily reminder Cody Garbrandt will Heem TJ

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Reem bless lads

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FInd a flaw

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>>77444057
Is this the ngannou thread?

does someone know where I can get 4chanx from?

>>77444051
135 is entertaining though

>>77444106
what rank was Jason Knight before saturday? He was ranked wasn't he

>>77444111
Not me

>>77443289

Non-midgets

>>77444111
Sent ;)

>>77444121
15

>>77443289
any mw, not a ww

>>77443727
>tyroid is natty

>>77443302
Classy as fuck.

>>77444108
>ngannou transfers the power of the bbc through the other two to the end of the line, thus completing the circuit

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>>77444097

>>77443329
I want to watch it.

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is this an inverted kimura

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cowboy is still my boy