/heem/

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ride or die
OR
swang and bang

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I could heem everyone here and twice on sunday

Black Beast is my boy

But I see him getting walk-off KO'd

>>76468725
Yep, count the Aussies, you have my permission.

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Alright folks it's time once again! This time New Zealand takes on the World!

New Rules: A decision win is worth 1 point and a finish is worth 2 points. The main event is worth 2 points with a decision and 3 with a finish.

Previous VS The World results:
Brazil vs World 1 (Belfort vs Gastelum): Away Team wins 6-5
UK vs World (Manuwa vs Anderson): Home Team wins 5-2.5
Sweden vs World (Gustoffson vs Texiera): Home Team wins 4-3
Brazil vs World 2 (Aldo vs Holloway): Home Team wins 9.5-7

I just have one question, since there are only 3 New Zealand natives on the card, should I count Australians for the home team?

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>>76468705
raising CTE awareness

>>76468767
yea you dingus.

>>76468767
see
>>76468762

>>76468767
Duh

>>76468767
why is the main card worth twice as much as the prelims? thats unbalanced as fuck

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>Living in Poo Peeland

for me,its paige vanzant

>>76468705
let's go face tattoos

>>76468752
come see me at sbg manchester pussy

>"Iran born Aussie"

Fuck off we're full!

>>76468762
>>76468754
>>76468778
>>76468786

Gotcha! We now have 6 fights for the scoreboard tonight

>>76468796
Not the main card friendo, the Main Event. Its the headliner and the most important fight of the night, so it gets a little something extra.

that is one proud aussie

>>76468806
Saved to my BSA banter folder lads.

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>>76468814

Unless you're an elite athlete, you are FAT @ 230 lbs. You're tittering on the line of obesity adan.

The fact people consider Conor the p4p 1 is fucking infuriating

http://www.gotoquiz.com/which_martial_art_is_right_for_you

>>76468752
lol I live 5 minutes away from Serra BJJ in Levittown. come see me any time. ask for Paul C. where do you train, chubs?

>the anakin skywalker hairstyle

>>76468846
anyone full grown non manlet male who has some resemblance of muscle mass is not nearly obese at 230

child

>>76468850
Out of interest, who is then?
Memety Mouse?

>>76468846
Even the HWs in the UFC who weigh in at around that weight are carrying around a lot of fat.

>>76468846
>tittering on the line
hes so far away from the line he cant even see it, the lines a dot to him

>>76468878
Jones

>>76468878
me

>>76468876
You're on steroids

>>76468846
lemme guess you're 5'8 or lower

>>76468846
see
>>76468876

Daily reninder that Asian fighters can only compete with eachother

>>76468878
cormier/jones

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>>76468876
For sure 100%

This guy has the firefox logo tattoo?

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>>76468846
>being a short manlet who isn't a lean 230
hehe

>>76468846
Why does everyone call Canadians Adan around here?

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>>76468916
hey, I've got one of those too

is this mokhababa a bogan?

>>76468876
>some resemblance of muscle mass
Sadly this doesn't apply to any of you.

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>>76468846
>manlet detected

>>76468878
No not mighty mouse but it just cant be Conor, hes had 1 submission victory in his career. He wins fights due to his overpowered left. He doesn't take risks like people say he does
>chad mendes!
Another little person with bad reach and chin

Stephen Thompson is skinny af lets see Conor fight him. He only has handpicked opponents. If he didn't have as much power every single fight of his would look mediocre

>>76468767
yes they are the same count them

>>76468846
please mighty manlet leave

this moron needs to stop shooting for takedowns

>>76468878
Jones, I'd even argue Stipe is higher on the p4p list than memegregor.

>>76468939
No, he's a camel jockey

how long until WME starts up the celebrity fight league? I wanna see the Biebs/Bloom rematch. don't any of you goofs even pretend for a second you wouldn't watch the shit out of that

>>76468939
whatever he is, he's completely fucking retarded. why is he trying to outwrestle a D1 wrestler?

>>76468846
>All these (you)'s
I triggered a lot of fatsos

>>76468950
I like the way you hate the Irish.
Commendable tßh.

>>76468976
F

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>>76468846
>y-y-y-you fatties aren't elite athletes
An average man who isn't a manlet should have no trouble being a lean 230.

Derrick Lewis isnt funny
I live in bongland and even I've met a hundred people with the same shitty black person personality he has

People talking about breath of fresh air fuck off

Maybe I'd find him funny if I was a 13 year old hype beast

I hate Mark Hunt as well but I hope he wins

Consider how out of shape the average UFC HW fighter is

Then consider that most of /heem/ weighs around the same weight and never trains

seriously, who should the goof be?

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>>76468919

>>76468975
You are a triggered manlet lmao.

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How many Fs can we get for Adam West?

>>76468999
whitaker?

>>76469002
Sorry I triggered you dude

>>76468993
>I hate Mark Hunt as well but I hope he wins

You sound like an bitter faggot m8, go eat a bag of potato smiles and cheer the fuck up.

>>76468919
It's the Ruger Firearms logo

it's only 9PM here and I'm already dozing off. this card sucks

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>>76468993
you sound like a great lad

>>76469014
explain >>76468989
You are clearly a jealous manlet lmao.

>>76468989
You're literally obese rofl
>10% bf
Why are you lying on the internet?

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Moraga should be cut if he cant finish this bum

>>76469024
you should upload a pic of yourself to shut him up for good

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>>76468993
>being a bitter faggot
lol get a life bud

>>76469017
Heres one now

An immature retard who finds Derrick Lewis spouting "ronda rousey sexxx ass"
funny. Honestly grow up you

>>76469034
>manlets
what were you expecting?

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>>76469014
>>76469002
>>76468975

>>76469039
You and i both know Lardo won't do shit

>>76469040
damn that girl is hot as fuck

Some one post the webm of Moraga in his dad's suit.

>>76468993
take that stick out of your ass

>>76469039
>>76469039
nice try nsa
>>76469029
Sorry I triggered you jealous manlet.

>>76469041
And heres another one. Hows it bad to not find a fake retarded black man act funny?

>>76469042
>become a bitter humourless cunt like me

Nah I'm good m8.

>>76469055
that was Cariaso

>>76469055
It wasn't him, it was another dude

Was he signed on image?

Moraga is making him look like a noob

>>76469040
Wow, what's this cutie's name?

>>76469055
I'm pretty sure that's chris cariaso

>>76469040
who is she?

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Finish this bum already Moraga

>>76469072
>>76469077
All manlet spics look the same to me.

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>>76469055

>>76469088
Where did you get this picture of me?

>>76469088
<being this triggered
Even if I was fat, I can change it. You will always be a manlet.

>>76469040
why is it gay to have sex with her even if she has a penis?

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>>76469088
kek at that pic

>>76469091
t. Nigel

>>76469063
>nice try nsa
you're ducking hard mate. the only way to win this argument is to upload a pic of yourelf. block out the face. otherwise you're just another retard on /heem/ shitting up the thread. why even chat shit if you won't back it up? it's as bad as any typical dork.

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>>76469105

>>76469071
I find funny things funny
Being intelligent doesn't mean I'm humourless.

>fighting Top 10s in ur UFC debut
is flyweight really that cucked for talent?

>>76469114
>Even if I was fat
I know you're fat that's why you're still seething at me.
>I can change it
Can you? Put the fork down lardo

>>76469091
>british 10 out of 10's

sick take down

>>76469120
You are a manlet, post a picture of you next to your doorway.

would a roided midget be competitive in flyweight?

>>76469105
He walks like a literal midget tii

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>>76468999

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>flyweights

why doesn't he just yank on the sand nigglers ponytail

>>76469139
you got me, i'm a manlet. i'm not the guy you're arguing with, though. you should post that pic to back up your words. otherwise just admit you're fat like i've admitted i'm a manlet. it's okay, it's an anonymous image board. no one will single you out as the fattie from the rest of the maple flags

>>76468999
ngannou

>>76469129
fuck off mong before I take your free school dinners token again

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>>76468999

>>76469003
F

>>76469160
Take your autism out of here

>>76469129
>Being intelligent doesn't mean I'm humourless.
hahahaha, this guy is totally Will from the Inbetweeners, but with possibly extra fedora

John Gooden fucking SUCKS

Tony and Cody should be above Conor on the p4p list because they're good anywhere

never bet on goofy looking tattoo dudes

He's not Persian, he's a churka. Used to do alcohol and drugs too

>>76469160
good post

>>76469177
inbetweeners? get out grandpa

>>76469188
>used to do alcohol
Are you straight edge? No normal person says it like that.

>>76469181
very true. the absurdly edgy look is a dead giveaway of them overcompensating for the lack of actually being a killer

>>76469177
>230 pounds

I see why you like Derrick now

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I miss Goldieposting lads

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How is this fight not over yet?

>>76469196
Dude he's Adan

of course he is

30-25 Moraga

>>76469196
I was too lazy to expand the sentence

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This is some shitty fight

what where the odds on moraga?

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>>76469207

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>>76469196
Goatfuckers do

>>76469224
around 1.48

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>>76469203
It is all over

RIP

>>76469192
kys my man, that show is a classic and you WILL respect that

>>76469201
about 70 off. i'm team ngannou anyway. funniest guy in the UFC is probably chiesa when he isn't sperging out about his mom. it's okay if you're autistic though. no one's really judging.

>>76469224
-190

>>76469115
i'm unironically gay and don't find bailey jay attractive, so maybe you're not gay for wanting to suck them tiddies

>>76469141
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CSviUJrjqS8

Not very well baka

>>76469203
Goldie: "And a nice little dose of vampire sexuality, only on Blade: The Series. Right here on Spike"

Joe:"What is a 'dose of vampire sexuality'?"

Goldie:"It's an ad they told me to read Joe. That's what it is."

Goldie was pretty based

>>76469241
ah shit should have included him in my parlay. but who fucking knew that rat tail would have literally no chance

>30-25

ground fighting rocks haha :)

>>76469209

wow that looks like nate marquardt if he had decided to be a plumber

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who /lmao/ here?

>>76469259
>Wanting to have sex with a man isn't gay

>>76469160
thanks man

>>76469207
she is hawt

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>30-25

>>76469249
>160 pounds
Please give me your number bbygirl?
Didn't know there was females on heem

>>76469279
>bailey got fat

What a shame.

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>30-25

>>76469279
THICCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC

wot does her thicc butt look like

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what is /heem/ eating, drinking. Im with a burger, fries, cheese finger and onion rings

>be Chicano
>nicknamed Chicano

really made me think

>Luke Jumeau
More like Luke Whomeau kek

Are u allowed to grab by the pony tail and knee to the face?

>>76469292
>says he's not a humorless cunt, just way too intelligent for Derrick Lewis
>says the most unfunny, dorky thing ever said on /heem/
baka@u2bqhwuf

>dreadlock pigtails

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> 30-25

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Lads have I missed anything at all? Just tuning in and webms seems scarce

>>76469304
yikes, could do with some serious squattage

would still smash though

>>76469302
Peruvian tears

>>76469259
ofcourse you dont want her, your gay, its a girl

Guys I'm worried my stream is behind. Is Moraga still being interviewed for you?

>>76469302
that actually looks really good but pepsi is for faggots

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dis nigga got mickey mouse ears

>>76469329

No, I'm watching shit commercials.

>>76469304
damn shes not the same since she got that kid

>>76469279
Is that really Bailey Jay? What the fuck happened?

>tfw you used to train at Dom's gym in Cinci
He's a great guy and I hope he wins

>>76469299
>>76469322
>wanting to fuck a fat dude

>>76469299
Protip: thiccfags are just idiots who bought into the "big is beautiful" feminist propaganda.

U brainwashed, nigga.

>>76469261
lmao that kick

based bellator

>>76469302
Too many calories for someone sitting around watching TV tßh famm.

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And a dominant performance by John Moraga gives the Away team the first point

Away Team: 1 Dec
Home Team: Nil

Rules: Decision=1 point
Finish=2 points
Main Event =2 points for Dec, 3 for Finish
Draws/No Contest=0

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If Hunt isn't giving his post-fight interview then your stream is 3 hours behind.

>>76469310
Don't get upset, why are women so sensitive?

>160 POUNDS

>>76469320
Only thing you missed were the korean girls delicious legs

>>76469279
>>76469304
she's (male) thicc now...maybe a little too thicc...

>>76469329
Hunt is fucking up Lewis right now

>>76469342
have you ever accidentally brushed his weiner during sparring? how big did it feel?

>>76469282
if he lets him butt fuck him that would be gay but if you're doing the butt fucking that's just displaying dominance

>>76469349
Wait what!? That dude was Iranian, fuck off.

>>76469345
yeah but not you lad soz

>>76469349
But Mokhtarian is Australian

>>76469292
Where do you live where women are 160 lbs?

>>76469302
I made some banana spring rolls with dulce de leche for dipping. Shit was good.

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This is stream i shitty mine, anyone got some HD stream ?

>>76469357
it's alright, Will. not everyone's cut out for bantz and comedy

Incoming round 1 heem.

>>76469375
He's Australian, lad.

>>76469322
https://www.instagram.com/beetlebailey88/

already lost the weight and gained ass, by the looks of it

Steele by KO

>>76469302
was that burger boiled?

>>76469393
repulsive

>>76469407
fuccin brilliant

>>76469387
he's fat so he (unsuccessfully) chases fatties

>>76469320
This is what happens when you stop believing in Jesus

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>>76469375
Pic Related

>>76469380
see>>76468826

>>76469393
That is a fat guy in a wig.

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>>76469403

Who knew Aussies and Brazilians were so queer?

>>76469396
You're literally a woman

>>76469444
wasted trips, mr. broken record

>>76469442
wanting to fuck a hot tranny is the straightest thing a man can do. see: ancient greece

Will Dan Kelly limp his way to another 29-28 split tonight?

>>76469438
Alright fuck it, Aussies and Iranians don't count.

>>76469458
broken records btfo

>>76469442
where's bailey jay from?

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>>76469439
>trying this hard to call other people fat
I see you adan

>>76469465
I hope so for the memes and because I unironically like the guy.

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>>76469442
Aussies we knew about, but Brazil is new. Embarrassing.

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>>76469440
he was born in australia to iranian parents

>>76469465
I hope Kelly wins
Wrestling coach here has made me appreciate his style, dadbod is pretty interesting

Fans demanded Jumeau be on this card he better deliver

>>76469465
I hope so, Brunson is a zilch

>>76469468
okay how about I scrub that point, but include the other Aussies so we have enough fights to mkae it interesting?

>>76469320
ViTRTor was a fucking monster. If it weren't for the USADA he'd probably be champion from Weidman until now.

>>76469481
>brazilians wanting to fuck trannies is surprising

>>76469482
armenian parents

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choose

>>76469494
Nah if he's born in Australia, he's Australian.
Carry on.

can Maoris be white?

>>76469494
>>76469482
whoops. nevermind I guess he is staying

>>76469393
Dude, no. What the fuck man? That is such a bummer.

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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>>76469496
Don't worry we have a new Vitor in town

>>76469502
smug mighty mouse

>>76469458
You sound upset

Trips confirmed you're a woman

>>76469502

wonderboy

bruh look at this dude

>>76469509
There are no pureblood Maori left.

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>>76469502
Like I said last time.

>>76469508
Glad we got that sorted Friendo, didnt want another UK vs World scenario

YEEEHAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

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tfw staying in a hotel and the fridge doesn't work well enough to make my beer cold

>>76469528
yeah I'm frothing at the mouth, comedy genius

>>76469524
Is this the true natty limit?

>>76469500
Maybe, maybe not. Some Iranians have -ian last names too. He'll probably confirm it in an interview sooner or later.

When did Thugnificent become a UFC fighter?

>>76469502
I made you a hunto one you utter cunt.

>>76469531
is that a fact or are you memeing?

>>76469560
You can't use one of the fighters that might get goofed as the goof image.

>>76469560
fighters on the card cant be a goof because if they lose they they goof themself

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One more poorlilwhiteboi.webm for my collection

>>76469545
You probably are, you're replying quick now, you're getting mad.

>>76469544
load up the ice bucket buddy

>>76469568
Truth. My Maori friends are half and a quarter, but they're Maori because they belong to an iwi (tribe and know their whakapapa (lineage).

>>76469578
you got me, pal. don't forget to log this victory on your e-debate calendar

>>76469578
FAGGOT

>>76469574
>>76469575
soz

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...

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>>76469502
I choose this

Steele 10-9 obv

>>76469544
>>76469586
This and salt. fill the whole tub with ice if you can

>>76469502
smirking Mighty mouse

Reminder that Aussies lost a war to, get this, birds.

GO STEELE

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>black """""people"""""

>>76469557
Nigga u gay

>>76469502
kookies

>>76469633
Irrelevant to the situation. Stop embarrassing us.

Gotta get busy Jumeau

will whitey get blacked? Seems like it...

This fights are fucking boring

>>76469659
Are you even watching?

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>>76468850
Pussy

>>76469633
Take your reddit shit and go

>>76469663
BASED WOODLEY

>>76469502
punished wonder boy

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>>76469671

>>76469667
What do you expect of cuckposters

>>76469502
Beat up thompson

Poor wittle

>>76469688
It's literally one of the top posts of all time on reddit you dumb fag

>>76469502
smug (right) max

>>76469693
unfortunately you can't talk like that on /heem/

>>76469674
>there are people in this world who think Maia's one-dimensional takedown entries will be too much for Woodley, a D1 wrestling standout with some of the best TDD in the game, to handle

>>76469693
No, you weirdo.

fuck this crowd is cancer

>>76469502
Hollyway the new champ

>>76469725
It's 11:30 AM

>>76469715
See I didn't know that, but you being a redditer knew so maybe you should be the one going back.

>>76469667
have you seen his spinning backfist though? Too much blackplosiveness for whitey. HEEM gonna come soon my man

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>>76469708
>>76469693
>>76469663
>>76469659
>>76469576

>>76469725
>cheering footstomps

seem pretty cool to me

19-19

Bloody boring round

>>76469729
It's 1.30pm

>>76469721
>expecting lawler-wonderboi-next timer-masvidal-maia "fans" to know anything
bruh

>>76469586
Yeah i'm already there. The ice only cools one beer at a time, though.

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>>76469737
fucking germs

>>76469738
>dogfart t shirts

>>76469743
screaming every time their fighter moves is not cool

>>76469626
Filling up the whole tub is a great fucking idea

This card fucking sucks

>>76469721
Maia can outstrike Woodley easily

Was Steele limping a little bit as he went back to his corner? My stream cut to commercial after a step and a half so I couldn't tell.

what are the chances that the crowd performs a haka for Hunt during his walkout? that would be so dope

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>Tfw Yoel is gonna get heem'd by Pooptaker

>>76469765
>s-stop having fun
fuck off geek

>>76469765
An Australian crowd would do exactly the same.
As do hues.

>>76469775
>DUUUUUUDE
lay off the pipe kid

>>76469775
100% my man for sure

>>76469757
kek

>>76469765
>>76469783
Vitor just won a fight because of this.

Kind of fight that makes you question why you're watching

I once went to supercuts and I got one of the worst haircuts of my life.

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>>76469775
He's not Maori.

>>76469786
lol the fuck?
>>76469789
i sure hope so

Heem wobbly

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>That heart form Steele

"get in there and penetrate"

>>76469790
Are you actually German or a slav/muslim immigrant or something?

CMON SON
KICKS!

>its a steroid nigerian episode
sick of these reruns lads

>>76469813
He's a cuckposter. What do you think?

BLEACHED

>>76469803
his gym still did it for him. it's on his fb if you wanna check it out

>>76469803
like that's a good enough excuse for nz'ers not to do a haka

>>76469738
what the fuck is the story with that shirt?

>>76469778
i thought that was on this card?

God damnit Steele take him down you bum.
>>76469795
Vitor won because he did more damage than Nate did.

>>76469809
Literally what your mum said last night mate.
>>76469823
I've seen enough hakas this week cheers

>>76469813
Slav. But there is nothing better to bait burgers with blacked memes during a boring fight

If you ain't a Kiwi
you've got a little weewee to this crowd.

>>76469839
When is mark hunt going to fight?

That spook is boring as fook

post the picks. I dont know who to cheer for.

Fuck my bets senpai.

>>76469838
She's a porn star and did a shoot with them.

>>76469839
213.

Jumeau 29-28 for me

>>76469845
Russian? Ukrainian? Polish? Other?

Chalk one up for the home team.
Thanks for nothing Poopeelia.