How do I get a body like Joe Rogan?

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THIS IS YOUR DAILY REMINDER TO PLUG IN YOUR BLENDERS, HEAT UP YOUR FLOTATION TANKS TO SKIN TEMP (35.5*C)

THE WEED HAS BEEN LIT AND IT'S TIME TO SLAM YOUR KALE SHAKES, TAKE A TOKE & MARK OFF YOUR CHECKLIST

TO POP YOUR:

ALPHA BRAIN
SHROOMTECH
KRILL & MCT OIL
PRIMATE CARE PILLS

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=22GjkJw0WXk [Embed] <---- HIT PLAY NIGGA

>YOUR FEAR FACTOR THEME SONG ALARM BLASTS THROUGH YOUR HOUSE

>YOU INSTINCTIVELY JUMP INTO YOUR HOMEMADE OCTAGON, FITTED WITH BATTLE-ROPES AND A "WRECKING BALL" STYLE CHIMP KETTLEBELL ACTION COURSE

>AFTER YOUR INTENSE WORKOUT YOU CALL OVER BRIAN REDBAN USING TING BEFORE GETTING INTO YOUR ISOLATION SENSORY DEPRIVATION FLOTATION TANK AND PACKING YOUR MOUTH TO THE BRIM WITH POT BROWNIES FOLLOWED SHORTLY AFTERWARDS BY COCONUT WATER ENEMAS JUST AS THE DMT KICKS IN AS YOU LISTEN TO DUNCAN TRUSSEL AND GRAHAM HANCOCK HYPOTHESIZE THAT THE PYRAMIDS = ALIENS AND THE ARK OF THE COVENANT IS HIDDEN IN UGANDA

DUDE BOOOOM LMAO

DUDE KETTLEBELLS LITERALLY ENCRUSTED WITH WEED AND DUNKED IN MCT OIL AND THROWN OFF BUILDINGS FEAR FACTOR STYLE

>"BRENDAN SCHAUB JUST END IT ALL, I THINK YOU ARE A WORTHLESS FIGHTER AND I HATE YOU, BUT COME BACK ON THE PODCAST SO I CAN BLOW YOU THE FUCK OUT OF THE WATER AGAIN AND REDUCE YOU TO TEARS"

>"BRENDAN "FRASER" "FUCK MY SHIT UP" SCHAUB, JUST TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT. YOUR CAREER IS OVER. IT'S TIME FOR THE SMITH AND WESSON RETIREMENT PLAN"

Joe Rogan, 2015

>YOU ARE NOW PICTURING JOE ROGAN NAKED IN A FLOTATION TANK WITH A MOUTH FULL OF POT BROWNIES TRIPPING

>>76281025
use your kettlebells bro

>>76281025
Literally who?

Be a manlet and take roids.

>>76281025
work out 3 hours a day and train with the best

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TRT

>>76281025
Hit puberty twice:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwwOn8ManNU

>>76281772
God his standup is awful

>he'll never do Newsradio again
feels so fucking bad

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>>76281025
you gotta eat big

>>76281772
>people look different 23 years later
Shocking development

>>76281025
alfa bran, KETTLEBALLZ, oatz

>>76282482
aaaand thread derailed

>>76282552
It clearly wasnt. Youre clearly a faggot tho

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>>76282552
say no more

HGH and kettlebells

>>76281025
smoke weed

>>76282730
no u

>>76281025
Loose 11 inches

>>76282446
>Newsradio
That reminds me; whatever happened to that Phil Hartman guy?
He was great! :D

>>76281025
Train in UFC fighting.

Why hasn't heem been banished to /asp/ yet? You guys are just as autistic as man drama fans. At least you follow containment procedure but still fill a thread in 30 minutes with shit memes and gibberish.

>>76287295
You may remember him from such tv specials like America's Favorite Funeral.

>>76287461
Literally nobody watches apehoop

>>76288555
apehoop makes mma's viewership look like a pbs channel at 10am

>>76288578
>American Idol is the greatest television show of all time