/heem/ - American/French Revolution Edition

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lol dude lame OP

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downloaded some dank webms from the archives

Did Nate Diaz really fuck Sara Jay?

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>when the CTE hits

>>75734066
no

>>75734094
I remember being so hyped about his return.
Why'd you disappoint me Barn Cat?

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>>75733014
i'll keep the file open for a while if you want an alternate version or something

>>75734066
>>75734132
>they haven't seen the tape

>>75734066
I certainly hope not.

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how're you doin spergy?

>>75734066
yeah man they did a scene together its called Earnest goes to Stockton

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just another heeminder

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>>75733976
mfw French Canadian =/= French

ffs

>>75734141
nah this is perfect. thanks bro

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>>75734166

is /heem/ dead, ladies?

I mean like kind of forever?

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>>75734197
>Expecting world knowledge from Americans.
Buddeh.

>>75734231
yeah mcgregor ruined it cause 189ers don't know real fite fans laugh at him not with him

>>75734231
nah dude

the regulars are either banned or just sick of it, but come fight night, it'll be roarin full tilt like it always does

/heem/ will be fine. dude I just slammed almost an entire liter of milk straight out of the bag immediately after crushing a box of KD

>>75734141
Dude, how do you make these?

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>>75734166
>this post
>this flag

>>75734272
lol

>>75734272
Holy shit

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>>75734277
what's wrong with my post bud

im closing down heem for the night, you guys have 5 minutes to clear out, see you tomorrow

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>>75734254
photoshop my man

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>>75734012

>>75734353
I mean, I figured photoshop, but I've tried to do stuff like this in the past and it comes out like complete dogshit.

>>75734337
>Beat MEEgan
>get Jessamyn?
>After accepting defeat Duke decides to take pictures of her pussy

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>>75734337
i think i'd like to collect all of the wmma fighters crying. i'll post what i have

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>>75734253
>dude I just slammed almost an entire liter of milk straight out of the bag immediately after crushing a box of KD
mfw you've inspired me to fire up the stove and make some KD. Got some awesome grass-fed milk to wash it down with, too.

>>75734369
look into SevenStyles photoshop actions. You can find them on thepiratebay and they all have youtube tutorials to go with each one. I'm really not that good at photoshop i just have a good understanding of the basics. the actions do all of the work and i just tweak them and put the images together.

if you try it out and have questions im pretty much here all the time

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>>75734411
that late night KD and smashing a huge glass of milk right after dude, there is nothing like it and americans do not understand

put some cayenne pepper in that KD man

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>>75734380

>>75734337
>i gave up my modeling career and tatted my whole arm up for this???

>>75734482
Ive never found milk refreshing

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>>75734380
thats all i got. i know theres more

>>75734411
Why do you feed the milk grass?

>>75734434
Sounds good.
Thanks, Photoshop Bro!

>>75734494
>2017-1
>losing to Felice Herrig
SAD!
SAD!
SAD!

I am such a turtle off my back. Whenever im in guard i feel entirely flat no matter what I do. Is my spine just weird?

Where have Spain and Schaubsperg been? /heem/ has been relatively quiet lately.

>>75734692
why are you complaining?

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>>75734692
!

>>75734692
Spain got a 3 day vacation because he got baited into a shitpost. Coralsperg got a 30 day one I think after some mega autism drama

So gsp can make 155 "easily", basically he won't cut to make 185, and he wrestlefuck bisping?

fuck outta here lmao

>>75734700
Not in the slightest.
>>75734709
Sweet

>>75734704
everything heem related needs to be in helvetica pls. do not disrupt

>>75734740
>Helvetica
>not an aesthetic font like Baskerville

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>>75734380

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>>75734380
forgot dis

Fuck Spain

Fuck Poopland

>>75734272
>looks just like Nate Diaz

holy fuck.

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>Raquel and Tecia leaks
>Raquel is naked
>Tecia isn't

>>75735095
but tecia didnt leak?

Lloyd Irvin

This women crying thing is getting me rock hard

remember when everyone thought that bantamweight was going to be fucked because ronda > miesha > holly > ronda
thats so funny to remember. thank god for nunes

>>75735121
>I now remember Mike Easton

How are you paying the piper today heem?

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>>75735095
>tfw no woman will ever care for you so much that she is brought to tears when she sees you accomplishing your goals

>>75734045
she has a tattoo on her pussy, that's weird

>>75735343
Its an intimate thing you share with your partner.

GSP saying he will fighter after october

What the fuck. Such an exciting division getting robbed by a clusterfuck. I need Yoel fight Silva for interim.

>>75735364

If your partner is a tattoo "artist".

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How the fuck did Stann make middlweight, he is god damn enormous

>>75735388
what is this a joke ?
Holding the division for months again is a shame

>>75735388
http://www.foxsports.com/ufc/story/dana-white-anderson-silva-will-not-receive-an-interim-title-fight-050617?amp=true

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>>75735388
Silva has no place in an interim fight, Poocare vs Poopy pants was the interim to make

>>75734494
still look cute though

>>75735468
Perry isn't a big WW and Stann likely gained a fair bit of weight after retiring.

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fuck the mods and jannies

they ruined /sp/

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Keep an eye out for my boy, lads

>>75735468
Stann fought when you could IV back up.

Turned up to Jiu Jitsu way too early
Lurking around outside like a right weirdo

>>75735883

You better be in gi.

>>75735583
Fucking bullshit

Dana saying as if Bisping will fight Yoel because GSP isn't ready for 5 more months, but Bisping said he will wait for GSP so this is outright lies fucking bullshit kys Dana

>>75735883
I remember doing that one time when i started, my professors thought i was a right weirdo

>>75735827

literally who is this manlet?

>>75736190
Hick Diaz

>>75736190
Are you new?

>>75736230

lol

>>75736234

no

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Leave Miocic to me.

>>75736568
stop meming this roider

>>75736583
MAKE ME

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>>75736639

>>75736019
based lith, fuck gsp and fuck White's people.

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>October

Holy fuck if Bisping gets a wait that long he must literally be blackmailing the company.

but seriously I think it might be Whittaker v Bisping in the future.

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>>75736688
>fight 50 year old who beat a random welterweight and was 3-6 in his last 9
>get your ask kicked and win a decision
>hold up the division for a year to fight a 36 year old welterweight who hasnt fought in 3 and a half years

is bisping, dare I say it, the worst champion of all time?

What was the most obvious robbery ever?

>>75736190
Do you only watch main events or something?

>>75736783
kill yourself

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>>75736783
Pic highly related

>>75736783
kys

>>75736780
Yes

>>75736780
You do have to wonder what WME are doing with Bisping. he really doesn't seem like a draw.

>>75737071
>Bisping doesn't seem like a draw

reevaluate your existence friendo

>>75736783
Lee Murray vs Bank of England

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Media luncheons are one of the most stupid inventions ever, even the word luncheon sounds silly, like some kind of pokemon

>>75737252
le 10 years in the making goat retirement ppv did an average buyrate. less than tyron wonder II and way less than 204.

talking shit dont mean he's a draw

>>75737485
This. Schaub's podcasts regularly btfo chael & Bisping in downloads. Schaub never talks shit but is the biggest draw in the game today 100%.

>>75735388
This fight is not big enough of a draw to put on hold this long.

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>>75737751
Thoughts on Australia's own?

>>75737982
Lel at that knockoff belt

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Hol up
*blocks your path*
So you
*Wait to counter for entire round*
You be sayin
*Meme for an entire fight*
We wuz
*Awarded biased decision by judges*
p4p greatest n shiet?!
*Cry on his knees after split decisioning a simple bout*

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Aspen Ladd vs. Jessica Eye who wins and how?

>>75738041
>hating on the G.O.A.T
I hope Hamas drops white phosphorus on your entire neighborhood

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>>75738044
She has so much acne, definitely a roider
I've seen a few roiders in my life and you can tell by the zits

>>75738044
Aspen "wew" Ladd via decision

>>75738062
He ruined his entire legacy by sticking around too long

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>>75738044
>who wins and how
my penis via stimulation

Someone broke my treadmill while I was away, what do I do?

>>75738168
Go outside

>>75738181
Running on concrete is a sure way to injure yourself

>>75738212
find a park then

>>75738212
excuses

I can't decide if Aldo or Holloway will win. I'm tempted to buy the card because I'm looking forward to the fight, but none of the other fights seem that interesting other than Kookie vs Claudia

>Conor named his son after himself

kek

>>75738255
sadly Aldo will most likely fight smart and outpoint him

I would really like to see Holloway as a reigning champion

>>75738266
Artem?

>>75738266
Idk if it's the same in the UK but that's like borderline traveler behaviour here, very scummy

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>>75738266
That way he at least will have something after Goobs

>>75738272

I tend to agree, but max is big and is good on his feet. The problem is I haven't seen him fight a fighter as defensive as Aldo, and Pettis looked good against Max in bursts.

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>>75738266
Being a Jr. must be unrelenting torment.

>>75738168
go in your pool
ride your bike

>>75738390
Who the fuck has a pool?

Kevin Lee knows that he's not promoted because he's unlikeable, not because he's black, right?

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>>75738390
Who was it lately admitting that he can't ride a bike ? Coral sperg or dockdwarf ?

>>75738266
i dont get it. is that supposed to be bad?

>>75738400
literally everyone who isn't poor

>>75738423
That's a thing that only gypsies do

>>75738423

First born is named after your father in civilized countries

>>75738423
Well it must be inconvenient to say the least.

And if your parents settle on calling you Junior you've been cucked for life

>>75738423
there's nothing wrong with it, they would have made fun of the name no matter what it was even if it was literally their own name

Cute

http://www.irishmirror.ie/sport/ufc/conor-mcgregor-dee-devlin-welcome-10367186?service=responsive

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>>75738427
>swimming

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>>75738492
>not practicing daily for triathlon season

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>having a kid when you're not even married

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>>75738489

>Arteeeeeeeeeem!

>>75738522
>being tied down to a woman before the floyd bucks (or even more ufc money)

cody just did the same thing with that gold digger which is even worse

>>75738492

>not using Celsius

>>75738492
Idk fahrenheit but it's a warm day today and I've seen americans shivering

>miss weight 3 times
>go up to higher weight class
>miss weight again

What did Lineker mean by this?

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>>75738568
btfo to be honest

>>75738541
the F stands for Freedom

>>75738585
losing to Dodson and TJ back to back messed him up

>>75738489
The wee lad is a bastard, yeh ?

>>75738597

More like faggot

>>75736127
It was the junior class so all the parents was looking at me like a weirdo and I was just like its not weird to wait for adult class to start

>>75738489
Whats his reach though?

https://www.instagram.com/conormcgregorjr/

Tiger didn't it first though

https://www.instagram.com/tigerschaub/?hl=en

Tiger is a trendsetter just like his pops

>>75738489
Conor Jack, I like it!

>>75738746
tiger is also not gonna be a manlet

>ywn be a 6'4 16 year old named tiger with amazing hair and athletic ability

is there any action today

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What did he mean by this?

>>75738833
Tiger for president 2054

>>75738833
But his mom is womanlet right?

He's probably going to be like 6ft

>>75738838
Boxing but too late for yuro times

>>75738842
He finally has had enough of being mocked by everyone.

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>post yfw dee has a miscarriage

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>>75738838
Canelo vs some Mexican

Another boxing weekend

>>75738853
shes 5'6. thats above average for a woman

>>75738864

>tfw your skull extends past your ears

>>75738881
Ok, I figured she didn't look that short compared to schaub

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>>75738909
yeah shut the fuck up kid

What if Conor jr is gay?

Tiger could beat the shit out of little Gooby. Cam Conor jr even hold his head up on his own? No? That's what I though. What a baby.

>>75738963
Gooby Jr via upkick heem. Little swoob will start his CTE early

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>>75738977
Jesus Christ /heem/

What time is Chavez Jr vs Canelo?

>>75739190
>le vacate his belt in order to duck GGG man
WGAF

>>75739190

around 9 pm pacific time US

>>75734045

> Has decent pussy

>Tats it and makes it look all wierd

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if im not banned, then why would a regular on topic post be deleted? im confused

>>75737457
Jesus Christ, the character design after gen 3 is fucking garbage. It's like yugioh, the number of spikes and colors goes up in inverse proportion to the number of ideas they have left

>>75739190
7 pm eastern time prelims
9 pm eastern time main card

what the fuck is with every mma person having a podcast?

is it the joe rogan effect?

>>75739783
Schaub busted open the doors tbqh

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is this the most attractive fighter?

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>>75739802
I think you would be surprised.

>>75739190
Wrong thread, blockhead.

>>75739815
There's no way that anybody finds that ugly mug handsome, I refuse to believe that .

Swob posting is a meme that had gone too far

Calling it Conor was a bad idea, because of how popular Conor Mcgregor snr is everyone will be calling their kids Conor

Also making an instagram for your kid just seems narcissistic and a bit weird.

>>75738041
*goes home to do steroids*

>>75739880
You're a manlet aren't you?

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>>75739951
187 cm, so between 6'1 and 6'2

>>75739973
How much do you weigh? Post a picture of yourself shirtless holding that card with a time stamp.

>>75740002
How about you stop asking strange men about shirtless pics on the internet, you weirdo

*comes out to O Fortuna*

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How many gooks will Artem have beat up by the time the year is up?

>>75740085
His winstreak is as long as his arm

lets play a game of guess the fighter by their walkout song/gimmick

>walks out to barbie girl

>>75740125
Mickey Gall

>>75740125
Paige Sletten?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wziex8J4ers

https://youtu.be/w_O1VNJwYas
>wmma

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>>75740169
They are going all out with free fites for 211, that's like what 4th already ?

>>75740194
Seab has blessed us.

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What are the chances Bethe beats Holly?

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>>75740237
considering that it's 2017 Holly, I'd say 30%

>>75740245
who is this huge nosed golbin?

>>75740237
100% by split decision

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NOW LISTEN UP CONOR JACK

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OFFICIAL TOP TEN GREATEST FIGHTER WALK OUT SONGS

1. Urijah Faber - California Love
2. Mike Bisping - Song #4
3. Carlos Condit - Know Your Enemy
4. Ronda Rousey - Bad Reputation
5. Clay Guida - There Goes My Hero
6. Miesha Tate - Roar
7. Chan Sung Jung - Zombie
8. Conor McGregor - Dewey Fog/Hypnotize
9. Anderson Silva - Aint No Sunshine
10. Jeremy Stephens - Real Muthaphuckkin G's

>>75740288
>no BJ Penn
>no Forrest Griffin

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>>75740272
Good thing you asked. It's Herica Tiburcio. The number one ranked atomweight in the world. She is pound for pound a top 10 mma fighter in the world right now. She is also a cutie and only 24 years old. She is the future of WMMA.

>>75740310
even tecia torres would finish her lmao

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>>75740310

These two losers would beat the shit out of Herica Turdicio.

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who /DANIELLE/ here?

>>75740346
Why are ebony women not very good at MMA ? World Star would have me believe they would be great but it's not the case

>>75740362
WMMA is young and will follow the lead of MMA. Ronda = Royce.

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>>75740328
>>75740346
considering atomweight and strawweight are different divisions, i dont disagree.
I doubt Tecia or Danielle would finish Herica at 105 tho. it'd be good midget fights

http://www.foxsports.com/ufc/story/dana-white-anderson-silva-will-not-receive-an-interim-title-fight-050617

LMAO! He thought he could mandrama his way to a belt.

>>75739918
Conor has been one of the most common names here for all time

>>75740440
are you pretending that's not the era we're living in?

>>75740194
Goddamnit, conor has a fucking bane coat? Is there literally anything he cant make cool? Remember when he was wearing a fucking bill cosby sweater in new york and still looked like a pimp?

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>>75740288
>Aint no Sunshine below #5
>TJ Dillashaw - Can't Stop isnt on the list despite getting bonus points for him actually knowing the band
>There Goes My Hero is on the list at all

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Conor literally lives a perfect life guys
He is undoubtedly the biggest star in the history of the sport, he has all the money he will ever need, and he has a beautiful woman who stuck with him from rags to riches. Plus, now he has a healthy baby boy who will never want for anything. Just fucking kill me now lads

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>>75740493

>>75740556
He also has a drug habit, nobody is perfect

>>75740577
>Someone posts a greentext with some out of context pictures
>lol, its a fact that conor has a drug habbit

>>75740595
>Le whippit man

>>75740570
Lookin like steve jobs 'n shit

>>75740595
lol youre a dumb little bich. You never watched his el chapo press conference where he was gacked out and couldnt stop moving his shoulders and grinding his jaw?

Good thing you little kids have me to tell you about real shit like drug use.

>>75740595
Literally everyone in Dublin knows about it you casual

>>75738437
>>75738293
I'm named after my dad, no pikey connections here.
I'm sorry that your father wasn't proud enough to give you his name.

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>>75740628
Obvious as hell desu

>>75740649
I'm unironically named after my dad and would rather not be

>>75740628
Have you ever watched any of his other Press conferences? He acts like a shit-talking jackrabbit at every single one of them.

You sound like a white suburban soccer mom
>Did you see how twitchy he was?
>He was probably on crack-cocaine!
>I just dont feel safe!

>>75738463
if they named him sean nobody would have complained. best name desu

Tiger is a much better name than CJ.

>>75740662
>He acts like a shit-talking jackrabbit at every single one of them.
Because hes constantly coked out, idiot.

>>75740706
McGregor is a much better name than Schaub

>>75740662
he's clearly tweaking in >>75740650. you sound sheltered.

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FUCK! thought the fights were on today, went to the store and bought beer and snacks for it. REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I am so post.

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>>75740706
Can Tiger follow a damn train ?

>>75738842
talking about taking out burger king so famous burger can reign supreme

For me, it's Tiger Schaub 100%.

>>75740955
Tiger is a beast for sure.

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>>75740884

This

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good morning /heem/

>>75740955

>Conor names his son after himself
>Schaub names his son after Conor's stomach

Is there a bigger nuthugger than Schaub?

Is there a single Brazilian female that doesn't look like she was dragged down from her palm tree nest in the Amazon jungle and forced to fight for her freedom?

>>75741074
What's a king to a Schaub?

If you don't like the name Tiger, for sure lose my number.

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>schaub poster is back

so is Anderson off 212 or what?

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>>75741237
it was nice while it lasted

>>75740628
You've never been around people who are actually on coke have you?

How could Dustin beat Conor?
He gets put to sleep with one shot and has less reach

>>75735098
The leaks are just all in underwear.

>>75735095
>can't tell if baby on the phone case is downey or just asian

>>75741925
for me it's Tiger Pax

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>GSP vs Bisping still not set in stone for some reason
>meanwhile number 1 contender is 40 years old waiting for a title shot after demolishing tons of ranked middleweights
>Bisping complains that Yoel is roided while wanting to fight a career steroids user who has an enormous bloated gut, looks so bad that even Bisping had to mention how GSP looks pregnant
>meanwhile Woodley doesn't have a clear number 1 contender at 170lbs and the guy who was the dominant champ of the welterweight division wants no part of Woodley
>GSP never ever wanted to move up in weight before, but now that Bisping is the champ he's all business
>Bisping is hardly a huge money fight, Bisping vs Hendo II, supposedly a money fight, sold less than Lawler vs Woodley
>at 205 the paper champ needed to cheat to make 205 and the commission allowed him to blatantly cheat
>real dominant champ fucked his division up by beating all top fighters including the current paper champ
>the only guy Bones didn't beat just retired out of nowhere, and looking at LHW now, it looks extremely barren
>FW belt is meaningless because the champ vacated the belt
>LW belt is not gonna be defended anytime soon
this semen slurping """""""""sport""""""""" is just a total joke, a farce on all fronts

>>75742188
All this plus Reebok and WME-IMG is why Bellator will be huge in a few years

>>75742188
lightweight is a literal joke
>conor "never defend me bets" mcgregor wasting time chasing boxing money
>number one contender khabib won't fight until october because of health issues/ramadan
>number two contender tony won't fight anyone but conor, khabib, or nate diaz (who won't fight him)
>number 3 contender eddie has been relegated to prelim cards
>number 4 contender is a welterweight now
>number 5 contender barboza won't fight anyone but tony (who won't fight him)
absolute trainwreck

>>75742248
Oh yeah Fedor vs Mitrione was a great fight plus they pay their fighters a fair share, like Chael getting 50k to headline

>>75741085
giving off Cyborg vibes here lol

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is /heem/ going to invade /box/ later tonight?

>>75742398

I don't give enough of a fuck about a dead sport to bother the goofs that still follow it.

>>75742313
After hearing Khabib will only be able to fight again in september or so made me wish he never ever gets a title shot. Imagine if Khabib gets the belt, we'll be lucky to get a single title defense per year, yeah no fuck that.

isn't ramaman is supposed to be one month, why is he unable to fight for so long? Maybe he's getting some money for being injured/sick, like the UFC's health insurance help or whatever, it surely beats getting punched to be paid.

>>75742326
>like Chael getting 50k to headline
that doesnt count the money he had on Tito though

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>>75742467

Collection of training footage from our favorite fighter Jose Aldo

https://www.instagram.com/p/BTFonRqDvc6/

https://www.instagram.com/p/BS1ojjVjKmE/

https://www.instagram.com/p/BSO8RF4jfY8/

https://www.instagram.com/p/BR9uyIyjTTv/

How would gastelum do in a knife fight though

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxw7eazSJjk

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>>75741085
>mfw the only wmma fighter so far without an abnormal genetic/hormonal/masculine/apelike profile has been Gina Carano

Anyone else looking forward to Danis vs Shields more than any fight on UFC 211?

>>75742620
no

>>75742620
Yes

>>75742611
maryna is cuter
>>75742620
nope

>>75742537
Tim Kennedy is a LARPing retard

>>75742537
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxw7eazSJjk
Similar to Jon Fitch
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DYGUoZyJs18&t=1s

>>75742646
>>75742701
mad cuz ur mum's a fan ?

>>75742731
He just doesn't want to get Chris Kyle'd, can't blame him, imagine being a target everywhere you go

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>>75742413
anybody else jerkin to this?

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>>75742413
>>75741085
wtf I love wmma now

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>>75734066

backstory?

>>75743323
attaboy Nate

>>75743323
thats a nice couch

>>75743323
thats downright nasty

https://twitter.com/BellatorMMA/status/860564424016355328
>11:38 - 5 may 2017. Happy Birthday to Russian Middleweight Alexander Shlemenko
> Born 20 may 1984
Lollator dont give a fuck about own fighters

>>75743323
SHE'S TAKING EVERYTHING I WORKED FOR, MOTHERFUCKER

SARA JAY IM GONNA FUCK URRR FUCKIN ASS

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>>75743789
nice

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>>75734380

>>75744008
mild kek

>>75744008
Isn't it just that goof with two-colored dick ?
I always turn off video when his in it, can't stand that chad face

>>75744008
Its a MIckey Gall and Sage Norcutt mom?

>>75744096
that's nick fool

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>>75734380
Paige cries a lot

>>75744165
>when reebok tells you to stop whoring yourself out on instagram

anybody watching cage warriors?

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>>75744224

>>75744277
memecrunch.com, how about you?

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FIGHTS HERE
>http://taima.tv/r/mma

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ARE WE PRETENDING AGAIN JON?

Listen to the woman Jon, CALM DOWN just CALM DOWN

>>75744458
No sound. I think my shit is fucked.

>>75744677
it is good, always works. did you refresh?

TELL THEM HOW GOOD I SUCC'D YOU JON

TELL THEM WHAT YOU TOLD ME JON

Post lilth dancing

someone with austitic computer skills should make a little game where you are Jon Jones driving around running over pregant women and collecting cocaine and evading police. You could sell it on the app store, call it Bones Jones Wild Reebok Ride

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>>75744816

>>75744875
FUCKING KEK

>>75744778
I did. Works now.

>>75744875
That's a lawsuit waiting to happen.

I just woke up from the worst nightmare ever. Raquel Pennington sprayed acid at me through her deformed tranny tits and I morphed into Sage Northcutt but with a Chuck Lidell goatee and those stupid ass short shorts but my legs were hairy as fuck and then I got teleported into mid air free falling and Raquel was right above me free falling as well and her masculine vegina was flapping from the air friction, slowly approaching me, so I had to fall as fast as possible so she didn't reach me.

All thanks to this bullshit general that posted those disgusting pics the other day, fuck you I'm permanently out of here. I'm mentally damaged.

>>75745173
Switch the name to Jone Jons

>>75745232
or John Joans

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>>75740361
me.

a shamed she is literally a womanlet, the UFC should make the atomweight division before the flyweight and specially the shitty featherweight.