>Antonio Valencia >never ever played for Valencia

>de Gay
>Is straight

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>Danny Shittu
>never played for manure united

>Kevin Trapp
>not actually a trapp

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>Curtis Good
>Actually not that good

>Petr Cech
>Isn't a professional penis inspector

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>>75532933

>Petr Cech
>He's actually czech

>>75532957
>throwing z's into your country name like an edgy teenager

>Rob Holding
>plays in a holding role

>>75532771
>Antonio Valencia
>isn't a delicious orange

>Toni Kroos
>passes more than crossing

>Messi
>actually seems pretty tidy

>Lionel Missi
>missed crucial free kick in WC final
>missed penalty in Copa America final
>missed penalty vs Chelsea before >Torres
>missed chance to score before Buyern 7-0
>

>Wayne Rooney
>Is not actually a Kangaroos Knee

>>75533153
kek

>>75533126
>Poo
>In the loo

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>>75533208
>literal joke of a country trying to chat shit about the world's next superpower

>>75533166

Fuck off designated, I don't need your shit stained laughs.

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>Jonny Evans
>actually dating some slut called Helen

>>75533256
>the worlds next super nuclear crater after a trigger happy Pakistani gets excited by all the N Korea chaos and just says fuck it nuke the cunts

Fixed it for you

>>75533153
brilliant

>>75533289
>implying any mudslime in the world has the balls to fuck with us

we cook slimes for breakfast lunch and dinner here, unlike you

>>75533355

Eating slime might explain why you're always shitting in the streets.

>>75533355
>we cook slime for breakfast lunch and dinner here, unlike you

Thats because you're poor

>>75532771

HEY LADS

WHICH KEEPER CAN KICK THE BALL THE FURTHEST!?!

>>75533411

DE GEA

BECAUSE HE CAN KICK IT TO VALENCIA
LMAO

>Daley Blind
>isn't blind every day

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>Villa
>Never played for Villa

>>75533657
neither did he play for Sevilla

what a fraud

>>75533355
Designated

>Dirk Kuyt
>isn't a tethered heavier-than-air craft with wing surfaces that react against the air to create lift and drag

>Jason Scotland
>isn't Scottish

>Florian Lejeune
>isn't actually young anymore

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>George Best
>Actually was the best

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>Paulo Wanchope
>Usually took two chops to bring him down

>Christian Eriksen
>isnt a mobile phone

>>75534143

Turns out his middle name is "Dannemann"

>is actually a Dane man

>Marco Reus
>doesn't drive a Royce, doesn't even have a driver's license

>Andrew Cole
>Black as coal

>New York city
>400 years old

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>>75532771
>Dick Advocaat
> Not a homosexual lawyer

>>75534684
That's VERY young for a city.

>>75533411
>>75533424
only one good

>Andre Villas-Boas
>Still yet to manage Villa alongside David Villa as assistant manager

>>75534836
Why does America keep embarrassing itself?

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>Daley Blind
>Has job that requires good vision

>>75534836
And how old's your constitution?

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>Rodney Whitehead
>has a black head

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>David Seaman
>Wasn't in the Navy or a fisherman

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>English Gardner
>actually an American sprinter

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>Kike
>Is a gentile

>Salva Sevilla
>never saved Sevilla A team

>>75534836

Germany is a really new country

>no rich heritage of oppression

>Can
>actually can't

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>Adam Johnson
>Gets his Johnson out to kids

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>Ruben Rochina
>plays for Rubin

>Leeds
>never actually lead

>>75535520
>wasn't a fisherman

Yes he was/is, he loves fishing. Shit joke/10

>Isaac Success
>Only one goal in 17 apps and Watford is 10th

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>>75535520

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>>75535520
>>75535520

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>>75535520
>>75535520
>>75535520

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>>75532771
>Dick Butkus
>never kissed a butt dick

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>>75535520

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>>75535520
>the fucking state of you

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>danny woodhead
>head is not actually made of wood

>Cuahtemoc Blanco
>is brown

>>75538209
CHI

>>75534540
Underrated

>ryan fredericks
>is only one person
>and not called frederick

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>>75534540

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>the brown
>is a ginger albino

>nani
>not shocked that onii-chan cums on your panties again

>DJ Campbell
>Is a footballer, not a DJ

>Sokratis
>Actually not Sokratis

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>OP
>has never made an original post in his life

>Claudio Bravo
>Plays like shit.

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>Jesus Corona
>not Jesus
>not a beer

>>75539899
>is not jesus's crown

>>75534540
>doesn't even have a driver's license
I thought he did now. Or did he get it, then have it taken away?

>Mario Basler
>never played for Basel

>Thomas Müller
>Never milled a day in his life

>>75533913
I never understood the hard on they have in England for this guy. He wasn't that good.

>>75532771
>Antonio Valencia
>never ever played for San Antonio Spurs

>>75545785

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LVdaDkiIOfM

>that commentary

>>75537412

he fishes for a hobby, being a fisherman is a job for smelly french fucker

Not even my post either

>>75537346
His name literally makes me laugh every time. Ever since I first heard it as a kid.

>>75533411
Neuer has a hell of a kick on him

Check out his assist against England in the 2010 World Cup for instance, ball must have gone 70 yards at least

>>75538508
CA

>>75555221
NO

>Ashley Young
>is old

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>>75532771
>Flavio Roma
>came from Lazio's academy

>>75536251
Underrated

>>75536251
underraged

>Chris Smalling
>is actually 6'3

>>75533126
>That flag
>Talking about football
Fuck off street shitter.

>Thomas muller
>Doesn't take corners

>>75555730
underrated

>Diego Costa
>Isn't a barista

>Alan Shearer
>Never shaved the hair off of a Derby player

>>75532821
MIILLLLLLL

>>75555799
Kek

>>75533126
Poo

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>>75533267
Stop bullying Pajeet, chances are you're just some pathetic NEET faggot still living with your mum in a shitty suburb somewhere

>>75533126
Oh my, terrible. Also, you're misspelling the name to self-serve the joke...? G-good one

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>>75535441
He talked about cities, and German cities are way older than your ones you fucking idiot.

Trier (pic related) was founded in the 4th century BC - that's 2,400 years ago. I.e., about two thousand years before the British founded their first settlements in America.

Trier is also where Karl Marx was born and grew up. The more you know.

>>75537108
>>75537269
>>75537303
>>75537330
>>75537381
>>75537412
J'aime tu, Pierre. J'aime tu.

No homo, naturellement.

>>75533272
>Jonny Evans
>doesn't play in high tech skate shoes

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>>75533832
>Dion Dublin
>is black

>>75533126
>all these butt-ravaged messi-cunts talking shit

Don't let it bother you bro

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>golden generation
>hasn't won anything

>messut ozil
>german

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>Conte
>Have Kante

>>75575126
>Germany
>isn't german

>Jamal Blackman
>is actually a blackman

>>75533657
>>75533666
not even Villareal

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>Ciro Immobile
>actually moves pretty well

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>Danny Drinkwater
>probably mostly drinks beer and sodas

>Stephen Ireland
>actually is from Ireland and plays for them

>>75565650
>Dion Dublin
>not even from Ireland

>>75575019
At least your golden generation performed much better than previous teams. Unlike England's.

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>>75536332
>Rochina

>Nile Ranger
>not egyptian
>not a power ranger

>>75533126
>have toilets
>shit in the street

>james rodriguez
>is actually hames

>Dennis Bergkamp
>Never been close to a bear to actually taste the bear's cum.

>sunderland
>it's not land of sun