/turnleft/ - 2017 O'Reilly Auto Parts 500 Pre-race/Race Thread

>ryan newman will never win a race again
>clit bowyer will never win a race again
>kasey kahne will never win a race again
>Dale Jr will never win a race again
>roush will never win a race again

debate this

>>75130544
Can't, dubs confined
also, Rollin for winrar

>>75130544
i would say clit and water cooler dale can win restrictor plate races, and roush can win a meme race, but dubs confirm

>>75130544
Bowyer will win this race faggot

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>>75130677

>Jones

FRM putting the TRD cheat tech in Jones to stop tech from inspecting Troox every week then

Also who /ragsinabox/ here

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>>75130763
lifelong

>Cup at Texas
>Sunday at the masters
>Indy at Long Beach
Who /comfy/ here

>>75130544
Clint is going to be the comeback story this year. He will win a couple races and finish in the top ten in points.

>>75130677
>>75130733
the almighty dubs have spoken

>>75130485
>first race I didn't check to see if I needed to include wind statistic
>first race with wind

Reeeeee

>>75130677
Jones confirmed for TRD cheats

rolling for first car out

>>75131033
Would not surprise me

>>75131033
extremely possible

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get your hands out of your pockets shitbag

>>75131082
He's human after all

how many cars finish?

>>75131082
Make sure not to cut anybody with those razor sharp knife hands

Rolling for the winner

The stream:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xWgwdMC7m_A

Gridwalk incoming

>woo-hoo

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>>75130485
>To the back: #48 Jimmie Johnson

Look at that crowd, Eddie Gossage really out did himself this year.

>I love Cottonelle toilet paper it's so soft

>this grid walk

Some Las Vegas odds:

Bread 6/1
TrooX 6.5/1
Kryle 7/1
Gimmie 7/1
Logonzo 7/1
Juneyear 22/1
Danny 25/1
Kahne 30/1
Krut 30/1
Clit 40/1
Autism 40/1
Newman 50/1
Suarez 100/1
Muh Nards 125/1
Steakhouse 125/1
Bane 250/1
Danica 500/1

>>75131294
>every grid walk
mikey is just a living meme

Jr. and Mikey should take their comedy act on the road

>>75131264
THEM SUMBITCHES AT COTA STEALING MY FANS

>Raceway ministries

>>75131324
would watch their sketch show to be h

loganos gf is a qt

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KRUT NATION, REPORT IN

That was a pretty shitty Star Spangled Banner

>>75131388
I feel pretty insulted to be honest family

>>75131224
why aren't you at the race?

Do you think Danica and Ricky have a pre race fuck?

>>75131388
That was literally terrorism! Some god-loving patriotic Texan execute that woman for treason at once!

Who else is flipping between this and them asters?

>>75131405
Well they both finish shitty so I'm assuming no.

>>75131405
>Ricky
>Fucking Danica
>Ever
lol

>>75131423
here

>>75130485
this is the shittiest OP image ive seen yet

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>drivers to your cars

WAT

>Ozzie

eddie is trash

*war pigs starts playing*

>Jim rome

>flips table

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>>75131376

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>fox latam transmitting WTCC
Fuck it, i'll watch Motogp

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500 miles is a long race, so make sure to get something to eat before the flag drops.

For example, new to TMS for this year, the Burro Grande is an oversized burrito stuffed with pork carnitas crisped with pecan wood smoked shoulder bacon, tomato cilantro rice, bacon and jalapeno-studded ranch beans, queso, pickled red onion, and Fritos for crunch. It’s then topped off with bacon avocado crema and sriracha aioli. Available for just $11 at Concession Stand 405 in the Gate 4 Concourse

really made me think

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>>75131519
>eating burrito

this is america. take that shit back behind the wall

>>75131519
>cilantro
DROPPED
R
O
P
P
E
D

>>75131519

>fritos inside of a burrito

What is this fucking Taco Bell?

>>75131519
PINTY'S MAKING GOOD FOOD FUN

>>75131423

yep

>>75131557
Official Sponsor of the Canadian Curling Association, and of NASCAR in Canada!

>>75131548

Mate I got like 20 more and this is by far the most normal.

>>75131401
I prefer to watch it from my couch :^)

>>75131590
Looks like everyone else did

every single race they somehow cram more shilling in

>on the pole starting with confidence sponsored by carfax

>>75130485
>Entire SHR team starts in the top 10....except 1

Still learnin'....

who was that t h i c c that just walked by

How does the driver's numbers work in NASCAR?

all this hype about the crashes in practice...

i'm expecting a let down today

>>75131664
Identification

>>75131664
it's like jersey numbers in football.

>>75131669
>only cautions are the segment cautions
>18 wins by 15 seconds

>Competition cawshun at lap 30

What do you guys eat at the race track? Call me old fashioned, but I like a big hamburger and some beer.

>>75131376
Team Krut, reporting...

>>75131664
Team owner buys number, its not attached to the driver at all.

>Autism

>autism

>competition caution
>ontop of segment cautions

what the christ

Autism is kill

THE PRINCIPALITY OF AUTISM DILLON

>>75131033
Holy shit, digits confirm

Why do they do that fishtail thing?

>the shantytown of the outside row

>KYLEL

>>75131033

Meme Magic

>>75131703
Oh so it isn't like the FIA system.

>Insidelinewinslol

>>75131731
Keep the tires warm

>kryle

PUT. IT. OUT.

this race is a failure already

>one groove along the bottom
>clean air wins

Harvick leads every single lap today. Screencap this.

>de bris, aka kryle is having issues

Competition caution on lap 3. Track is bad. Race cancelled.

Wait there aren't any stages in the this race?

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>de bris

>>75131803

there are

>brand new race track surface
>enough room for 5 cars wide
>can only run in one lane or you risk crashing out

Well done, Texas.

was there actually debris

>>75131825
Plastic bag

>Suarez has a Speedy Gonzalez pit sign

DAS RAYCIS

>>75131803
85 is the first stage

>>75131835
actually pretty funny

These pit boxes look confusing to me. The driver parks his car on two different colors of pavement. I would accidentally park it too close to the wall, trying to get off the blacktop.

What's SMI's obession with shitty 1.5 mile tracks?

They could have built a based track from scratch and instead just copied Atlanta and Charlotte.

>>75131033
Holy fuck
You just got a 2 for 1 on that roll

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>joffry
>rood

>JEFFERY EARNHARDT

>>75131033
>

>>75131033
YOURE A FUCKING WIZARD

>>75131033

WIZARD

>>75131033
Holy shit

is this whole race gonna be filled with cawshuns wtf

Rolling for winner

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>>75131033
>3 and 33

*sigh*

>Geoffrey

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>>75131894

becuase you can fit more seats around a 1.5 miler than a short track

this mattered when people actually went to races in the 90s and early 00s

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>>75131691
Burgers are good but why not quench your thirst with something fresh?

A TMS specialty, the Shake N' Bacon Brew is 6oz of Ugly Pug Black Lager, a matching portion of Vanilla ice cream, a splash of bacon infused maple syrup and a dash of candied bacon bits all mixed and topped with a dollop of whipped cream plus extra candied bacon! Just $10 at Concessions Stand 305 in the Gate 4 Concourse.

>>75131931
NEW MAN

Backmarker crash. The rivalry no one knows.

>Dr Pepper

>>75131033
what the fuck is happening

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>>75131033

>3 and 33

hell yeah eddie best track in nascar

rolling for big shunt 5+ pile up

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>>75131939
If you're in the mood for something a little less sweet, why not try the Hawg Heaven Bacon Cotton Candy Martini?

The bacon-topped cocktail features citrus vodka infused with bacon flavored cotton candy that gives it a bright pink color. The glass is also topped with two strips of candied bacon and will be available for just $12 in The Speedway Club.

>>75131939
a milkshake made out of beer?

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>>75131033

SMOKE BANTZ

Roll for how many laps until the next caution

Wow blanket almost ended his day right there

Hendrick having a strong day so far

Why is Ganassi good all of a sudden?

LANDON IN THE TOP 10

What if Danica drove a race with a pocket dildo in her pussy?

>>75132164
is there a fanfic of that

>>75132164
>what if

>>75132142
Still using Hendricks engines but they started making their own chassis which has made a difference so far

>>75132142

They get the decent Hendrick stuff that SHR used to get.

>>75132142
All the resources Chevrolet used to put into the Stewart-Haas operation are now being applied to Ganassi

>>75132164
>>75132175
>>75132182

Oh no.....

LARSON KAMIKAZING THROUGH THE FIELD

>>75132175
don't you fucking dare

>Kensuck
>Manufacturer is the sponsor

lmao.

>PUT IT OUT

PUDITOU

>>75132175
>>75132182
>>75132201

Tony probably smells her seat when she gets out of the car.

whats the point

Maan... those stands are empty.

>two competition yellows called "stage breaks"
>need another competition yellow anyway

jesus this series is dying.

>>75132294
ITS WHAT THE FANS WANT YOU IGNORANT SHITLORD

Why? For what reason?

>>75132307
for the competition

>>75132287
Camera tricks!

>>75132287
shhh

How do you have a broken trackbar before the race even starts?

>>75132307
They added a bunch of rubber to the track last night and told the teams they will take a competition caution to take a look at how the tire wear looks and how the car is driving with the changes

>buescher does something cool in the pits
>no replay

>>75132326
eddie what are you doing on 4chan? Shouldn't you be out trying to block other races from happening within your geographic location?

>lelson penalty

>You now remember the '97 race where Todd Bodine battled for the win with Jeff Burton as a substitute driver before self-spinning

>>75132325
>stopping compitition for the competition

>>75132338
Trying to get away with fuckery.

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>competition caution
A convenient time to head to Concession Stand 405 in the Gate 4 Concourse.

Come try some of TMS's signature snacks, like these Hawg Heaven Queso Wings! Four oversized chicken drumettes, doused in a bacon queso sauce and then topped with a mixture of crumbled Doritos and bacon bits. Just $12!

Holy shit Buescher.
That was sick

>>75132369
What other track is coming in? That Mickey Mouse shit down in Austin thinks they're gonna roll up on us?

>Keys to thr drive

>edgy

>>75132401
>>75131996
>>75131519
wtf I hate bacon now

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>>75132338
Rumor is Austin Dillon has a history of taking Ryan Newman's food out of the fridge at the RCR garage. Newman got his revenge this morning.

Has there been a race this year that hasn't been complete shit?

>>75132589
Daytona, Martinsville

>>75132589
At least the finishes have been decent

>>75132589
Daytona, Martinsville

it'd be nice to see based blaney get the stage win

Cassill's car is kill

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Who does he take out today?

>>75130485
this is the greatest OP image ive seen yet

Which Drivers wife should I fap to?

>>75132758
Kyle Busch's and her stapled on tits

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>yfw everyone's too afraid to ever criticize Texas on Reddit because the track astroturfed their board

>>75132758

mikey's ex, buffy

>>75132758
you could probably rent Austin Dillon's

>>75132786
/r/nascar is a disgrace

>>75132786

Reddit's been like that forever though. You can't say anything bad about the racing, drivers, the stages, etc. Notice how there's a shit load of posts shilling about how great Monster is?

>>75132826
It's only good for getting the streams.

>>75132786
Cancer.

You have to go back.

>>75132779

Just googled her, fuck that's an awful tit job.

>didnt even sell out all the RV spots on the back straight

Truly kill

>>75132686
>The Destroyer of souls
>The Devourer of hearts
>The Destructor of dreams

Half the field, right before the end of stage 2

>>75132786
>Texas Motor Speedway shilling on plebbit

Jesus that's fucking disgusting I wish you never brought up plebbit now.

based Blaney wins stage 1

Based Blaney doin' thangs

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>end of segment one
>almost 3pm
Time for a mid-afternoon snack!

Keeping with Texas tradition (everythig is bigger in Texas), TMS is proud to announce the Hungry Fan TV Dinner for those with their own big appetites. The Hungry Fan includes 1 1/2 pounds of barbecue cheddar chipotle meatloaf topped with onion crisps and barbecue glaze, 12 ounces of mashed Yukon potatoes sprinkled with cheddar cheese and 12 ounces of elote-style corn that combines chili powder, parmesan cheese, cilantro and mayo. Just $18 at Concession Stand 405 in the Gate 4 Concourse.

Why did they think making 1+2 terrible again would make the track better

fuck yeah blaney

>>75133092
>no bacon
wtf i hate food now

>>75133092
surprised HungryMan hasn't sued them

Glad to see Wood brothers in the hunt this year.

Harcuck blocked blaney

Why can't Eddie Gossage just fucking die so we can have a race a track that hasn't been complete shit from its inception?


You can count on one hand the good races here and still have fingers left over.

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*blocks your path*

>>75133308
THICC

>real people. not actors.
>initial quality awards

This is your yearly reminder that this disgrace of a track is why we only have one Darlington date. Fuck this track and everyone who supports it.

>>75133118

What if I told you the repave was to make Indycar racing better?

How much do you want to be that the Radioactive this week will cut out the drivers complaining about the track?

>>75133350
That makes even less sense.

>>75133366
a gorillion

Holy shit!

Blaney made Troox his bitch!

>>75133347
No one likes Darlington, grandpa!

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B L A N E Y

>>75133308

>got to fuck prime Jennifer Jo Cobb
>stole all her racing stuff
>still doesn't give a fuck

How can he be so based?

god damnit harvshit is gonna win

>>75133350
Even though someone nearly dies every time they race here, Indy at Texas was always good on the old config.

>>75133411

fuck you eddie

>>75133350
That didn't work in 1997 either

>McMurray's CC leaving him out
>again

>>75132686
Looks like it might be himself or his pit crew

>>75133092
I really hope these are pasta. Telling myself that anyway.

>>75133350
Well the track damn near killed Newgarten last year but they made it worse. Would not be surprised if irl calls the june race off.

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YOU JUST KNOW

>>75133469
How long do you think until he puts it in the wall?

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>>75133350

>MindyCars on a repaved speedway

ha ha time for DEATH

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>>75133480

The only pasta here is on the Kid's Favorite All-Beef Hot Dog. Topped with mac 'n' cheese plus fritos, these dogs can be found at the Loaded Big Dog concession stand in the Gate 5 Concourse for just $7!!

>>75132401
I'd be down for that... at half the price

>>75133581
Kid's First Bypass

>>75133581
>When TMS has actually astroturfed 4chan

>>75133350
>for Indycar

>Firestone Firehawk 600

>CART

>cancelled due to concerns about driver safety.

>>75133639
he does this every week

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First time watching a race, lads. Who should I root for?

>>75133635

It is horribly ironic that the track woth the largest number of calorie bomb food nightmares is also the home of the My Bariatric Solutions 300.

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>>75133581

>>75133690
the empty stands

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>>75133493

Mario Andretti is still a fucking pimp at his age, goddamn.

>>75133665

That was because CART were retards and had cars that were so fucking fast drivers were blacking out on-track because of the G-Loads like Fighter Pilots sometimes do.

>>75131519
>>75131939
>>75131996
>>75132401
>>75133092
>>75133581
FUCK OFF TEXAS MOTOR SPEEDWAY

>>75133665
>CART
>Existing in 2017
>implying IRL/IndyCar, LLC hasn't been at Texas since Day 1
>implying Indycar didn't just put on the best race in TMS history, with the closest finish in TMS history

in b4 Blaney dominates this whole race only to have some meme shit happen towards the end to keep him from winning

>>75133753

is this your first thread of the year? trackfood anon is great

>>75133761
>best race in TMS history
>took months to complete
>driver got maimed

>de bris

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>>75133690

Have you seen anyone eating TMS's signature bacon cotton candy, available for just $6 in the Gate 4 Concourse?

>me on left

>muh big tv
>muh everythings bigger in Texas

That's literally the only gimmick this track has, no wonder no one shows up.

Commercial cawshun
duh breeze

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>>75133780

deep in our hearts, we already know this is what will happen

>>75133785
>took months to complete
>implying that's not why they just repaved it

>broken collarbone
>mained

>>75133780
delet this

A competition caution is the perfect time to grab a Jackelope Sausage, a signtaure exclusive for TMS's track concessions. This sausage combination features a delectable blend of pork, rabbit and antelope. It’s sure to make believers out of every fan. This one-of-a-kind sausage will be featured exclusively in the suites at Texas Motor Speedwa

>>75133780
>Atlanta 2001

YOU SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH

dude fuck yes I love nascar

I can't respect anyone who disrespects nascar
its like they've never gotten drunk with their buddies and done high velocity dumb shit
or they've never gone to a nascar race themselves, or they've never gone faster than 120 mph

>>75133878
Pic?

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>>75133878

How silly of me

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>shitty long beach today
>indy 500 is a month away

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>tfw just booked an Airbnb in Charlotte for the ASR and Coke 600
>First time working in the Media Center

Can it be next month yet? I'm really excited.

Memes aside, what is the best competition caution snack at the Texas Motor Speedway and where is it located?

>>75133910

Whoever you are, NASCAR Concession Conisseur, don't stop doing what you do

>>75133797
I know a job is a job is a..., but imagine going to culinary school thinking you're going to end up being a head chef at your own restaurant in New York or some other metropolitan area, but instead you end up in charge of making Eddie Gossage's gastronomic abominations. It has to eat at your soul.

More based overhead shots Fox

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TRUEX BTFO

Truex cucked himself hard

>the city of Denny Hamlin

>>75133974
You can see it in his eyes that he died many years ago.

how much of nascar is man/machine

can a good driver win with an average car?

>>75134025
no

>>75134025
Krut dragged the 78 with skill to a ton of good finishes

Remember when Dale Sr pulled off his own tear-off under green at Talladega?

>>75134025

>can a good driver win with an average car?

no

>>75134025
In long distance oval races, no.
You need a good, consistent car to have a chance.

>>75134025
Memes aside, no.

>>75134062
>>75134069
>>75134071
>>75134073
>>75134082

so which team has the best cars?

>>75134025
no but at least the cars are closer than say f1

>>75134101

Hendrick, Gibbs, Penske

>>75134025
On Road courses you see average cars that can win races bc their driver is skilled
i.e Ambrose & Allmendingsr

>>75134025
No. Also important to consider bad drivers with good equipment don't finish up front either. Danica.

>>75134070
Remember when Sterling Marlin pulled out his own fender under red at Daytona?

>>75134158
>Remember when Sterling Marlin pulled out his own fender under red at Daytona?
N-no.

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>This will get the buying tickets!

>>75134101
Top Tier:
Penske
Gibbs (they suck this season)
Hendrick
Stewart-Haas

Almost top tier:
Front Row
Gannassi

Front Rown recently became successful with Truex and just added a second car. Gannassi has seen a huge upgrade in speed

Mid tier(won't compete on these 1.5 mile tracks
Richard Childress
Rousch

Slower tier:
JTG Daughtrey
Richard Petty
Germain

Slowest Tier:
Everyone else

>>75134158

he was gonna win the title that year if he hadnt broken his neck

>>75134239
>them*

>>75134239
>first 30,000 ticket holders

are there even 30,000 at the track today?

>>75134070
Or that Richmond race he unbuckled himself to clean the windshield

>>75134246
You meant Furniture Row, not Front Row, right?

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>>75134239

>Natures Bakery isn't even the sponsor anymore becuase they defaulted on their payments

AYYYYYYYYYYY

>>75134120
Kurt finished 3rd at Sonoma in a phoenix racing car that had a trackbar break late.

>>75134286
Yea
My b

>>75134158
>You know remember Steve Byrnes doing Sterling Marlin impressions.
RIP

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Every time I see the commercial for Smithfield Bacon I am reminded of TMS's signature dish, the Hawg Heaven Bacon Nachos. This bad boy consists of tri-color tortilla chips sprinkled with bacon powder, topped with white cheese bacon nacho sauce, candied bacon, jalapenos, black beans, pico de gallo and sour cream.

Just $8 at Concession Stand 405 in the Gate 4 Concourse.

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>>75134353
F

Is Jimmie gonna wait till the last two laps?

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>>75134353

>>75134239

For actually going and having to shit through this shit fest everyone should get a car or something.

de bris

>de bris

oh no
not a piece of bear bond

A PIECE OF TAPE UP AGAINST THE WALL IN T1?!??!?

fuck right off nascar

>gimmie crying about stage points
waaah waah fucking baby

>Jimmie will never EVER look natural on camera

>ready to go in 3 laps
its amazing what NASCAR can do when it tries

B L A N E Y
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>>75134594
Debris cautions in ARCA yesterday took like eight laps

>no beer Blaney wins both stages

Memes incoming

>>75134659

is it happening?

Blaney has a hell of a car today.

So how is he going to fuck up the win?

File: IMG_2644.jpg (234KB, 1280x720px) Image search: [Google]

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I don't know about you guys, but the double yellow of a fill course caution has always reminded me of the Hawg Heaven Double Barrel Dog, a signature TMS concession honoring the famed revolvers handed to each race's winner.

The Hog Heaven Double Barrel Dog features two foot-long, locally made Texas hot links, a mix of jalapeno bacon and caramelized onion with bacon queso and crunchy spicy pork rinds on top. Available for just $11 in the Gate 4 Concourse.

>>75134686
pit crew will choke on the last pitstop of the day

>>75134686
well he's probably going to lose some track position because he stayed out while lots of others pitted.

>>75134594

this.

the worst part of stages so far this year are cutting laps off the next stage under fucking caution

>>75134686

well. everyone who just pitted will stay out. so he will restart like 25th.

>>75134703
pig disgusting. why does it look plastic?

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>monster girls

>>75134664
To be fair that's a .5 mile track, and it's ARCA

>>75134738
It's not pig disgusting, it's HAWG HEAVEN

>>75134705

Probably this, agree.

When's indycar btw?

>>75134664
And some of the drivers didn't hit the brakes until the third caution lap. ARCA is a mess.

>>75134754

How did Monster know I have a fetish for /fit/ midriffs?

>>75134851
Should be starting soon

Would you Jamie Little ?

>>75134851
Coverage starts in 10 bings, green flag probably a quarter after the bong.

Why the fuck didn't Johnson pit? I can understand Balney staying out for the win, but why would anyone else have stayed out? That was suicide

>>75134863

Why is that despite being a national touring series, ARCA has drivers who are stupider than the rednecks who race at the local dirt track every saturday??

4 car to the lead. What's his name?

>MUHNARDS

>>75134864
It's not a fetish to like attractive women, anon. Monster girls are conventionally sexy. It would be a fetish of the women were obese or had penises.

>>75134904

nah. idk why but she doesnt do it for me anymore

>>75134916

Shit results all season so far. Needed a stage win, badly.

>>75134928
Local dirt track racers are smart enough to realize they can't race a national touring series, ARCA drivers are not.

ow, My Nards