/bundes/liga

gooooooooooooooooooooood morning

hello?

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Godmorgen

good morning

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Good morning.

Fire Schmidt.

#SchmidtRaus

JUST fuck my shit up

bonjour

the freaking Lotte game is aired? great. this is gonna be very exciting game

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>>74428573
cologne fag here. One local newspaper, who is usually pretty well informed when it comes to Leverkusen, wrote today that the club is going to replace Schmidt after the season.

>>74428626
That is not the pic I intended to post, but whatever.

>cologne
>fag
yep, checks out

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>>74428646
interested?

no.

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sure?

yes.

good evening, /bundes/

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>>74428626

>that the club is going to replace Schmidt after the season.

Fire this meme tactic using joke now!!!!!!

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>Das wird keine Kurzzeit-Sache werden.
>Seine Symptome weisen auf verschiedene Krankheitsbilder hin. Am wahrscheinlichsten ist eine allgemein metabolische Myopathie

>>74428709
money and fame aside I kinda feel bad for him.

t. Götze

hello

hallo

hullo

How do it feel Klopp has been exposed and is further proof german league is shit?

>>74429089
whats it say and why they block out eyes?

>>74429112
Klopp has a better position than he did when he left the BL

also:
5:1
:
1

>How do it feel Klopp has been exposed and is further proof german league is shit?
nice logic burger

>>74429112
it translates as >>>/b/urgers >>>/o/ut

>>74429130
damn bro you sure destroyed me. how will I ever recover?

>>74422796

Kevin Großkreutz was taken to hospital last night after a fight.

>>74429136
That was never my intention, just see it as a kind request to fuck off.

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>>74429165

Pavel Dotchev has stepped down as coach of Aue

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Moin /bundes/
Headed New Orleans way today.

>>74429165
that's what happens if you don't have a döner on you to defend yourself

>>74429190
Wish I could "tag along" haha

>>74429165
Argentinians trying to murder the world cup winners

>>74429190
3-4-1-2-5
1--2--3

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>>74429190
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LR82f0GJgXg

>>74429165
first drachenlord, now großkreutz
seems like success truly does breed jealousy

>>74429200
this is why I always carry my schweizer-taschen-döner with me.

>>74429112
she is a prostitute saying:
"when dortmund plays at home the brothel is empty anyway. might aswell be on the Südtribune"

your a prostitute

I have a prostitute in my pants

:^)

/f1/ is actually not too bad for a fast-moving general.

>>74429279
this desu. Lurking there made me somewhat "interested" in F1 again, although I only watch 5 races per season maximum.

>>74429165
based GOATkreutz

aue aue mein trainer

>>74428709
>Laut „Bild“-Informationen hat Götze Probleme bei der Fettverbrennung.

>>74429292
Yes

>not posting the updated version of the pic
OP pls

>>74429262
ficki ficki?

>>74429370
huh?

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>>74429409

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Lamo

>>74429488
>not pissing in a cup and throwing it at the opponent's fans

>>74429488
>wildpinkler
heh

BVB HURENSOHNE

https://www.sporcle.com/games/fugtigfars/danish-players-in-bundeliga

Can you name all the Danish footballers in the Bundesliga history?

>>74429517
shitensen

>tfw no prostitute BVB gf

>>74429487
>not having 5 burgers, fries, a pizza and Diet Coke in front of goetze

Strp up your meme game

>>74429590
do it

>Manchester City interested in Bayer Leverkusen star Benjamin Henrichs as Pep Guardiola plans defence overhaul

lol

>star

lol, again

>defence

lol, trips

being to stupid to get trips on a slow board like /sp/
lamo

>>74429089
>Gewürzmischer

wat

>>74429622
this is how Gewürzmischeranon looks like

Gewürzmischer Anon here.
I can confirm this

Haha let's bully this young man day after day, year after year after year haha he's rich so he deserves being constantly publicly humiliated and bullied we all know that if you are rich it's impossible to be depressed :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

>>74428285
are they cosplaying? i honestly cant tell anymore

morning

>>74429813
I don't think so. Good afternoon.

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Holstein Kiel's mascot. Highly disturbing.

i hope götze kills himself

>>74429792
it's just banter, la

>>74429609
Henrichs is unironically a pretty good prospect.

>Buyern HSV re-reun

I am changing the channel!

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>>74429792

>both Tyske Pokkal games on TV3 Sport 1 tonight
Good

>>74429841
why is he so angry?

>>74429876
More importantly: Why are there so many storks in Slesvig-Holsten and so few in Sǿnderjylland.

>>74429906
bcz Sǿnderjylland smells liek butt

True

>my parents are going to Harzen again this year
I mean it's a beautiful area, but maybe more suitable for people ~15-20 years older.

>>74429792
i get taken on all the time too. they think because im a big guy i can take it. and i do

>ywn cuddle with denmark

>>74429963
good. i cant imagine myself cuddling with a man

>>74429841

kiel a shit. especially the trainier is garbage.
>le sign players and offer them a beautiful landscape man

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>>74429983

good post

why do we like reoccuring events so much

huh??

autism

Why is Slesvig-Holsten so good a handball yet so bad at football

because

>>74430072
more people play handball than football. its like asking why is bali so good at surfing and so shit at football

why is bali so good at surfing and so shit at football

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Dp0wxF7bxw

>>74430156
bcz bali smells liek butt

dancing through the appartment

>>74430156
more people surf than play football

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where did it all go so wrong

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do you ever wonder what this is all for

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>>74428082
who /lifelong into eternity/ here?

yes, i'm here now.

>>74430248
pipe down, customer.

>>74430252
where have you been

>>74430257
>unironically shareholding in 2017

top kek

>>74430287
brazil

you?

>>74430301
me too

>>74430217
Are you listening to music

>>74429938
>Harzen

Do you mean the Harz? What is Harzen

>>74430315
yes

>>74430330
Hartz IV kriegen

>Großkreutz befand sich in einer sechsköpfigen Gruppe mit Bekannten im Alter von 16 bis 18 Jahren. Ihnen gegenüber stand eine Gruppe von vier Männern zwischen 16 und 19 Jahren. Nach einer kurzen verbalen Auseinandersetzung flogen die Fäuste.

>Dabei wurden Großkreutz und ein Freund jeweils mit einem Faustschlag verletzt und mussten mit Platzwunden ins Krankenhaus gebracht werden.

>28 year-old man
>hanging out with teenagers
why?

>>74430315
yes

monster trucks are so automatic holy fuck

what does that even mean

>>74430426
haben sich fabian und seine truppe mal wieder nicht im zaum halten können... naja dieter wird ihnen schon einen zuhause erzählen

>>74430452
he prefers to fuck teenage assholes

>>74430336
>>74430454
What music

>>74430330
Yes the Harz, sorry. It's Harzen in Danish.
Bad Lauterberg.

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>>74430452

>>74430492
i had 500 songs on shuffle, from reggae to techno.

one song i danced to was De La Soul - Ring Ring Ring (Ha Ha Hey)-[www_flv2mp3_com].mp3

1. take a German word which ends with a consonant
2. put "en" at the end
3. now you've got a Danish word

I hope Delaney is enjoying his time in the Brem.

>>74430492
わたしの物語

>>74430534
Anime music, I see.

>>74430526
Seriously though, the -en/et ending just literally is the Danish version of putting der/die/das/the/la etc. in front of the word.

>>74430526
Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsaufgabenübertragungsgesetz

Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsaufgabenübertragungsgesetzen

wow, it really works

ich bin rugih

>>74430542
hai

>>74430533
do you mean "bremenen"?

time for dinner

>>74430515
I really like "the Grind Date". https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmte57oKe6U

fickenen

>>74428082
>eintracht - bielefeld

Not sure if I'm hipster enough to watch it.

>>74430587
yes thats okay but way tougher

>>74430598
it might be excitingen

>>74430592
Has to be a noun

>>74430515
Okay. I'm listening to/watching some Swedish P3 Guld performances.

worst /bundes/ thread of 2017

/bundes/ used to be funny and away from the mainstream german chan culture

where did all the retards come from?

>Präsentiert von: Alexander Bommes
>Gast: Mehmet Scholl
no oliver no me

>>74430630
Eintracht lost their last 3 matches and wasn't able score in any of them. Bielefeld is in 2. Bundesliga relegation zone. Unpredictable? Sure. Exciting? Don't think so.

>>74430678
Krautchanen

>>74430689
>Exciting? Don't think so.
it's a knockout match and the Eintracht and Bielefeld ultras are pretty good

>>74430678
I felt like s̶h̶i̶t̶ funposting today and apparently it catched on.
I don't browse kraut threads btw.

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do you think bundes is autistic?

>mainstream german chan culture
lamo

>>74430720
what does the post say?

thx

ur welcome

thanks

>>74430689
but it's the magic of the Pokal

eintracht - bielefeld 2:1
lotte - dortmund 0:4

dont forget to screencap this

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>>74430720
what do you think?

>>74430808
the webm too

goodbye
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IN6sgADcRT8

>>74430802

>bvb bus was stuck in the deadly swamps of lotte

JUST

two of my posts in the screencap

can you guess which??

actually 3 desu

>you are the kind of person who gets tongue-tied from overthinking things !!

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>drunkzil

Do you remember when we made the
>
m
o
etc. haha. That was good.

Anyway this is actually me https://youtu.be/yhkBsjdYrrM

yeah looks about right

Does someone have an acestream link (or another hd stream) for me?

AUF DER WIESE STEHT NE KUH

>>74430921
diversity is always good for a nation

BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM

BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM BLUM

:(

>Frankfurt fans singing Wonderful Days

preddy gud 2bh

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e7g6NwLF7Vw

>its wednesday already
its basically thursday for me because tomorrow is mainly paper work

>>74431137
its tuesday today

>>74431143
okay

its tuesday today

I will go away now

so it's like that, huh?

>black jew

wew

>people identifying themselves over their job and what they own
its ridiculous

I base my identity on what people with my skin colour did centuries ago.

I base my identity on denmarks cute feet

>muhheritagemark

lol, I bet Denmark is a nigger

shut up hakan

>Barkok

>>74430678
Kc tier post tßh

>>74429190
>>74429217

4>3>2>5>1
1>2>3

>lisicki will never smash your head between her thunder thighs

hätte den kackbus liegen lassen

BVB: Bürki, Bartra, Reus, Guerreiro, Aubameyang, Kagawa, Piszczek, Castro, Schmelzer, Weigl, Durm

Can't find Lotte's

the BVB match is postponed

>no BVB match
LEL

Während in Frankfurt die letzten 20 Minuten laufen, wurde das zweite Viertelfinale des Abends zwischen Lotte und dem BVB wegen Schneefalls abgesagt!

>shareholders can't handle some snow
typical taschentuchel and his heulsusen

>>74431753
So how would they have lined up, if the match weren't cancelled? 3atb with Piszczek on the right, and Schmelzer on the left? Just seems kind of odd to have a 3 man defence, with only one proper CB.

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>Don't forget to take in enough minerals, Anon.

>>74431777
checked

>>74431788
name one mineral i can take in

i've something as hard as a mineral in pants you can take in ;)

---------Auba------------
Reus---Kagawa----Dembele----
--------Guerreiro------Castro----
Schmelzer-----Weigl------Pisscheck-----Durm
-------------Bürki-------------

>Dortmund - Lotte just got cancelled because of snow

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I WENT HOME FROM FASCHING TO WATCH THE GAME AND COULVE STAYED TO BANG SOME UGLY DRUNK CUNTS INSTEAD REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>Fasching

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Fastelavn

>>74431833

Halt den Rand, du unkultivierter Bastard

what did denmark mean by that

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>fasching
>karneval
>fastnacht

>Dortmund scared of Lotte
>tries to get their own bus stuck in mud to miss the game
>some guy pulls you out
>rent some snow cannons and place them around their stadium

>>74431859
I think that's Danish for "carnival"

>>74431872
kek

>Der starke Schneefall macht ein DFB-Pokal-Viertelfinale in Lotte am heutigen Dienstag unmöglich

translation: dortmund literally shaking in fear of getting BTFO in a Pokalfight

typical shareholder attitude

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which of you guys started the deep fryer to cancel the game?

>Nöthe

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Really makes you think

>>74431897
Götze

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>>74431906
>iPhone

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yeah, the pitch really looks unplayable...

>>74431966
kek

night

Gib stream for BVB please

>>74432000
see here
http://www.abendzeitung-muenchen.de/media.media.50feea16-b7dd-428b-b8b5-3f63fe4342e8.normalized.jpg

>>74432000
it's been postponed because modern footballers are a bunch of poofs

>>74432000

game was cancelled

>>74431906
You should call Brych and tell him that it's really not that bad

what now? :/

>>74432017

how do you retards think this played out?
>dortmund shows up
>see a little bit of snow
>say they wont play
>game postponed

this totally happened. ABD's are the worst.

watzke basically confirming that fatze is dying

yes i think so too

Shareholders are very very happy

>>74431804
THis dick :DDdDDDDD

would have been great to see them getting exposed by /3.Liga/

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wow, it's nothing

>>74432129
Me in the middle

german speaking bros, does geiles Stick mean something like horny slut or horny whore?
Can you explain to me the use of "strick" in this expression?
Or is it nost stick but it's a similar sounding expression? can you help me?

>>74432141
>t. Ismail Atalan

>>74432047
but that's pretty much what happened

>>74432143
do you mean "geiles Stück"?

>>74432143
geiles stück?

>>74432143
Yes

>>74432143
"geiles Stück"
literally: "horny piece"
translation is something along "hot piece of ass"

>>74432143
see >>74432176
translation is "figa"

>last two home matches in the league have been postponed for Lotte
and people are surprised that this match has been postponed

Götze will never play football again

>>74432143
geiles Stück
"Stück" means piece or unit, so it basically "objectifies" the woman

>being this small-time and amateurish
Lotte should be suspended from the competition for five seasons

>paying the dfb to postpone the last two home matches so this doesn't seem suspicous
classic dortmund. what are the odds of the replay taking place at the westfalenstadion?

>>74432204
source?

>>74432196
they trashed their pit against 1860

>>74432235
yeah

>>74432143
it's "geiler stock"

>westfalenstadion
shareholder detected

>>74432219
0% cause that's not allowed

>>74432283
pretty sure they'll find a way around that "rule"

>>74432143
geil doesn't mean horny anymore in Germany
only when someone says "Ich bin geil" -> "I am horny."
other than that geil can mean things like awesome, great, hot, sexy, great

>>74432168
>>74432170
I guess it's that
thanks to all these posters, a you to you
>>74432176 >>74432186 >>74432215 >>74432252 >>74432322

i've something geil in my pants

lewd

what a disappointment :(

what now??

watch coppa italia


juve vs napoli

and do stretches

>>74432626
I'm going to watch something and then maybe try and sleep.

okay

https://www.ted.com/talks/hans_rosling_shows_the_best_stats_you_ve_ever_seen

watch this

Usually I dont mind edgy jokes and dark humor, even to the most recent stuff. I feel a bit blue and really concerned about Götze though, feel bad for him. I know there are 2938562589629 children who are starving and having AIDS and people in my street probably that have it way worse, and he is a millionare and will get all the treatment in the world, it still hit me quite hard though.

No I will be watching Jörgen Leth in Baskerlandet.

>>74432736
the player on their site is shit so here is the YT link
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hVimVzgtD6w

>>74432758
Sorry, this episode he is in Kantabrien.

>>74432626
I'm going to watch the current Bohndesliga episode.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yy70QdOzRGE

>Es gibt über 40 Stoffwechselerkrankungen, darunter Diabetes, Depressionen, Gicht, Über- und Unterfunktion der Schilddrüse oder die metabolische Myopathie (Stoffwechselstörung der Muskulatur).

depression is a metabolic disease?

>>74432626
>>74432676

show feet.
Im tempted to show feet of my gf, but I dont think she would want that.

>>74432744
I agree
>>74432736
F

i will post a pic of my feet in exchange

>>74432826
when caused by lack of serotonine or dopamine yes

>>74432886
Its also a bit of guilt, making fun of him and his physique all the time, and how his a flop compared to Dembele.

I guess because I often watch the matches with my gf and we talk a fair amount about the people, its like you care for them.

>>74432826
how long until he throws himself in front of a train

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Can we expect Götze goating up if his treatment is going to be sucessfull? A Götze with more pace, dynamic and stamina sounds pretty neat desu.

>>74432744
I wouldn't say that it it me hard. But mihms aside, you can say that it really made me think.

>>74432945
I find it funny that this disease can be caused by a unbalance of chemicals aswell as just having a shit life and going through shit stuff. Eitherway you get the same meds which is a bit strange, because in the second case its fighting an unbalance in your brain that doesnt really exist.

>>74432888
are u an girl?

>>74432995

In my opinion, Götze can be the next Deisler. """Metabolic disturbances"""" is just an excuse to disguise he's going off the air for a while for depression treatment or something like that.

no i'm not

My Hartz 4 just arrived

Time to buy me a BVB toaster

>>74433079
hurry up! most stores close at 10pm.

Then post feet

>>74433079
Sounds like a video game

>>74433053
Maybe. But right know everything is pretty much spekulatius, so we'll have to wait and see.

>>74433079
where is mine ;(

I cant decide today if I want it hotter or colder in my room.

I always err on the side of "colder"

my apartment is always like a freezer, especially in the winter where sometimes the room temperature is as low as 15C

this

I can relate to these post. Although 15°C is a bit too cold for my liking

i always have super cold hands at home : ((

>>74433544
there are a lot of videos on youtube that should help you.

16°C is perfect for getting comfy under a blanket

>>74433023
that unbalance of chemicals can be caused by having a shit life, so it's the same

„WIR WISSEN, DASS DIE LETZTEN ZEITEN NICHT EINFACH WAREN UND AUCH JETZT NICHT SIND. DER VEREIN STEHT IMMER IN DER KRITIK, DIE LEISTUNG WAR NICHT SO WIE ERHOFFT UND UNRUHE STAND SOWIESO IMMER GANZ OBEN AUF DEM PLAN. AUCH WIR FANS HABEN DARUNTER GELITTEN. ZUM GROßEN TEIL ZERRISSEN VON DEN MEDIEN, ABGESCHRIEBEN IN VIELEN DEUTSCHEN MEDIEN, GEDEMÜTIGT IM FERNSEHEN, HOHN & SPOTT VON BEKANNTEN UND AUCH AUF DER ARBEIT UND IN DER SCHULE MUSSTE MAN OFT AUFGRUND ABWERTENDER KOMMENTARE LEIDEN.“ DAMIT SOLL SCHLUSS SEIN!

ok

apparently it's march already

good night

>>74434841
good night

>>74433937
No its not. Maybe I explained it wrong, but the concept of how to get your brain to create mor serotonin sounds unhealthy. I knew some people who were really different after those, and I dont think in a pleasen/balanced way.

Playing around with your receptors can even influence feelings like love.

goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood morning

good merning. do your best today!

Yes, good morning.

Good morning.
Bayern will beat Schalke by five goals to none tonight.

>>74441436
I think Buyern will concede one, Schalke will get excited, and consequently be crushed.

I'm preparing for my /ekstraklasa/. It will get more professional with every post

>>74441452
Good. Don't forget to attach a pic of Maria.

Gladbach will defeat the HSV 2bh

>>74428285
>one of these men is muslim

>>74441715
and the other one is Christian

>>74442263
Are modern players sissies? This doesnt look any worse than my Bolzplatz last week

>>74442589
you are an idiot.

Marcel Schäfer has left Wolfsburg & has signed for Tampa Bay Rowdies.

>the most punchable German player got punched

well...

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>>74442620
Back in the days they didnt used to be so cowardish

#againstmodernfootball

>>74442646
rip in piece

>>74442646
Me in pic

>back in the days an elbow to the face in a zweikampf wasnt even a foul
>back in the days you could at least watch ackergebolze with no play value

I bet you would also like to abolish the offside rule.

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>>74428082
Good morning, how about some Rüssel

>>74428082
Is this /cric/?

>>74442748
me on the left

>>74442753
no, kys

Wegen einer Fußprellung kann Großkreutz derzeit nicht für seinen Stuttgarter Klub spielen und trainieren. In seiner Freizeit besuchte er am späten Abend mit Freunden eine Oberstufen-Party in der Nobel-Disko „Perkins Park“.
Als Großkreutz und seine Kumpels die Party verließen, kam es um 2.15 Uhr zu der Schlägerei mit einer vierköpfigen Gruppe auf dem Wilhelmsplatz. Faustschläge verletzten den Ex-Nationalspieler und einen Freund von ihm.
Die mutmaßlichen Täter wurden von der Polizei in der Nähe des Tatorts gefasst. Es handelt sich um vier Personen im Alter von 16 bis 19 Jahren. Gegen sie will Großkreutz eine Strafanzeige erstatten.

Auffällig dabei: Die Freunde, die ihn begleiteten, waren im Alter von 16 bis 18 Jahren. Sind also viel jünger als der ehemalige BVB-Profi (236 Spiele für Dortmund).

>go clubbing in your injury time
>attend to a school party and make friends with kids to pickup jailbaits
>get beat up by kids
>the state of Kevin

>>74442745
back in the days football wasn't a multi-billion dollar industry

>>74442765
>Oberstufen-Party
dafuq is wrong with this guy?!

>>74442748
how can you compete?

>>74442765
>Oberstufen-Party
lel

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>>74442765
Wait really? KEK

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>>74442765
classic kevin

>being heemed by a kid born in 2000
wow

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>>74442765
bild delivering as always

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>>74442765
>>74442821
>baitkreutz

I wonder what's hidden in his closet.
Wouldn't surprise me if he had a child with a 15 year-old and paid her (the 15 year-old) off.
Maybe the kid who knocked him out is the girl's brother.
KG strikes me as the type who would be inappropriately interested in teenaged girls.