Any advice for a long distance relationship? Any interesting

anything?

>>25543258
Advice-get good at communicating with them. It's pretty essential to brush up on those skills since you can't rely on physical intimacy to strengthen and refresh your bond

>>25543258
Did you start out as LDR?
How long distance are we talking about?

Usually it doesn't work out. Time difference and lack of interaction kill it.

Be sure to make them feel special, laugh together, cry together, be there for each other, have fun.
Make sure to have something regular you do together: watch movies/shows, share music, play videogames. Be open about everything, be honest, don't push them to do the same but let it come naturally. If you push too hard you might scare them off and it's easy to just ghost someone online.

Send them gifts at your discretion, but never EVER send them money.

>>25543312
Did you love her/him?
I'm with this girl, who I do really like. However, idk is she is being faithful or not. Have you ever cheated on your girl/guy? Did you ever send gifts? I sent her some headphones.

>>25543319
Trust is key.

I loved her to death, still haven't gotten over her fully after two years. She was the first person to ever tell me she loved me, she was there for me when I needed her and I was there for her in return. She started calling me her boyfriend and I was overjoyed.

She turned out to just be using me as "a surrogate boyfriend" whenever she and her other LDR cunt where fighting, hence she spent a lot of time with me.

I got her some videogames, don't really regret it honestly.

>>25543348
Im sorry to hear that. Did you meet her on here?
did she tell you she loved you?

>>25543374
She added me on here a long while ago.

She told me she loved me, yes. She made a little video (for her other boyfriend) and figured she'd send it to me as well, not realising she said it in there. After that she figured there was no way back so she stuck with it. Her words.

>>25543386
Im sorry man, that's insane. Have you started dating again?

>>25543391
Tried a bit, but it seems to not be for me.
Had another LDR but that turned bad now that she's having personal issues. We still talk and such, but it hurts honestly.

I know a lot of people who did have succesful LDRs though, plenty of people in my old wow guild ended up getting married. One of my best friends had an LDR as well and they're now engaged and living together. It can work out.

>>25543406
how long did that one last for? Do you think maybe she just wasn't right for you? Was she faithful?

>>25543414
I think it was about 3-4 months maybe? We were really close before that but it wasn't anything official I guess.

She has always been faithful, and she was so right for me.... perfect even. She is struggling with a a lot of issues and I still support her in those. She tells me whenever anything happens. I just can't really do anything from half a world away and that sucks.

Be sure to have the means to get together when things to turn serious with your girl.

I had a LDR with someone that ended 2 months ago. She was awesome. Felt like we could talk about anything. but eventually she started pulling away. sucks to feel this way, but honestly, i liked having a LDR. I've dated IRL and i was never able to meet someone who was close to what i wanted in a partner. I'd try again if it ever happened a second time.

>>25543447
Idk it is just really hard to trust her...like we dont even communicate as often as we use to. I honestly think she is with another guy, but I can prove this.
>>25543432
it will get better. I have been in many bad relationships in the past. This too shall pass.

>>25543319
We started out as LDR but I'd visit every other week. Trust was a big problem in the beginning and I did some things that weren't exactly cheating but still bad. Stopped getting wasted and the problem was gone. I missed her a lot when I wasn't with her. After two years I moved back home. Then after half a year we moved in together. Things were great, but now 1.5 years later she broke up with me. We really loved each other but living together has its own problems. I know I should let her go, but I'm not giving up that easily.

>>25543494
It's hard to trust someone, especially if you're not near each other. It happened about the same. Over time she stopped wanting to communicate until we broke up and it was partly my fault it ended up that way. all you can do is trust the other person and move forward. try not to think of them as being a goddess or something like that.

>>25543494
also i didnt sleep today so i don't think im making sense with my writing.

>>25543566
Did you love her? I mean honestly, Sometimes it's a really hard question.

>>25543587
I loved her, yes. i'm a dick irl. dated alot but didn't give a shit about their feelings or cared if we broke up. but it hurt when we broke up. it's confusing to know what love is, have to just trust your feelings i guess.

>>25543594
did she love you?

>>25543602
can't really speak for her but i'd like to think so. We talked alot about things we've never told anyone. she would always call me or message me if she was feeling sad. i could be sleeping and she'd call just to talk with me.

I have a story that I posted on /fit/ awhile back, and an LDR is apart of it. Lemme know if you fags wanna hear it.

>>25543638
yes

>>25543258
Some of you look at the damn world with such rose colored glasses. Well kid, I'm here to smack those things off your thick head and so you the world for what is really is. That would be a shit stained rock.

Face it LDR don't work. Unless your other half is under 24 hour FBI surveillance or they are some weird purity religion, they are cheating on you. The second a girl is away from her guy she already has her panties on the floor getting her hole plugged by some guy. If the guy is the douchey one in the relationship and his girl doesn't think he has some college freshmen chick bent over in doggy style, I have a flesh colored oral thermometer between my legs she can use. Get over it and out of it. Use what is left of your brain.

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>>25543662
>December 23, 2015
>17 years old, 5,11 and 150 pounds of pure pathetic beta.
> I was a swimmer and runner so I had good cardio but I was pathetically weak.
> I didn't have any friends at all outside of vidya friends online.
> I was pretty depressed at this point, had suicidal thoughts
> Was a history autist but I didn't think I had a future in that, directionless.
> One day remember what I wanted to be when I was a kid.
> I wanted to be in an Army Ranger.
> The next day I discovered /fit/.
> Really don't know what i'm doing but I begin to hit the gym.
> Couldn't even lift the fucking bar.
> Didn't give up, read all I could about dieting and routines, I wanted this more then anything.
> Made plenty of noob mistakes, but I fixed those and never let myself give up.
>Lifts making steady progress, always going up.
>Suicidal thoughts and depression melt away.
>The Dopamine spikes I got from lifting were slowly melting away.
>By this point, I had even begun to make friends at school.
>Their names were Owen and Noah, and though I didn't know it at the time, great things would come of this friendship.

>>25543690
From my OP:
I just wanted to tell you guys how much all of you mean to me. If your willing to listen, I wish to tell you about my story, a tale of lifts, shitty food allergies, unrequited love, and Serbian ethnic nationalism. I'm writing this in the hope that another lonely, sad anon will see this and begin his own fitness journey, and be given the strength to carry that feel.

Been in an LDR for just under 2 years (anniversary is 9/28). Long distance is the 'high risk, high reward' option for relationships: ask anyone who was long distance for an extended period of time before moving to be closer and they'll agree, if you're able to make it last then the foundation of your relationship is incredibly strong-- but they are arduous, painful, and will push you to your limits. No one will ever question why a long distance relationship failed, because that's the expectation for most of them.

But the truth is that most people aren't willing to put any work into relationships. At their core they're basically everything most people don't want in a relationship: you will be a) physically removed from your partner and b) have to trust that they are being faithful while c) you yourself are tempted and d) have to be able to resolve conflicts without being face-to-face and e) all the while you're questioning whether it's really worth it to do all this f) while totally alone.

But. Consider what it means to be in a relationship with someone while all of that is happening. The rewards are a) a reminder that helps with the tedium and grind of cohabitating b) a profound level of trust c) and fidelity d) an ability to communicate EFFECTIVELY which is absolutely critical to every relationship and the lack thereof is often the cause of their termination with e) absolute resolve and dedication while f) being able to enjoy the presence of your partner, and knowing what it means to be apart.

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>>25543697
>Continue on auto-pilot through the school year and summer, keep working out.
>Summer ends and senior year of High School Arrives.
>Doing the typical SAT and ACT studying, because despite telling my parents I wanted to join the army they weren't really ready to accept that.
>I'm still on auto-pilot, with some shenanigans and gaming with Noah and Owen.
>Despite being very different pretty different people, me a Conservative Orthodox Serb, Noah an Ancap Muslim and Owen an Italian turbo-normie gf and all, we're thick as thieves and would do anything for each other.
>In October, Owens gf cheats on him with some druggie loser and leaves him.
>We try to console him "She was an SJW whore, who cares" etc, he had loved her for two years and doesn't get over her for awhile.
>It was that month that made me realize that I was alone in the world, I had no one like Owen had.
>This lonely feeling was magnified as lifting wasn't having the dulling effect it used too.
>On December 16th, 2016, I met her.

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>>25543703
> I was bored that day and was lurking boards I didn't visit often.
> Out of shear boredom, was checking /soc/ and laughing at how all the people claiming to be women got tons of replies from guys more beta then Redditors.
> Why yes I am boring
> Shutter in disgust in remembering how a year ago I was not totally unlike those guys.
> See that they have a skype thread.
> "Huh, wonder what this is about" I thought.
> Same sort of shit, if you can imagine Tumblr and anime con with a 10 to 1 men to women ratio, you have an idea of what it was like.
> I realized I have no one to talk to, and actually consider posting.
> I figured there must be at least one historyfag or Byzantineboo to talk to.
> Make a post and forget about it, go to sleep.
> Next day I check it, and there was a message.
> "Writing to you from C O N S T A N T I N O P L E"
> laugh, thinking this person was joking and reply "Cool, a fellow Byzantinephile! Favorite Emperor?
> "Mehmed the Conquerer :D"
> Figure out both that its a she and she's actually Turkish, we banter about each other for the next two weeks or so, have a lot of laughs.
> Didn't care if they were telling the Truth or not, I just enjoyed talking to them.
> Finally feel we should have a skype call, and I press the camera button expecting an obese Turkish man or a catfish.
> Video camera comes on.
> She's cute, really cute
> We talk for 3 hours until my mom asks me to help with dinner.
> We talk almost every day, coordinate calls and chatting so that its not too late or early for the other person.
> At this point in time I only considered her a friend, my secret 4chan buddy who was repilled about da Jews.
> That wasn't going to last for much longer

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>>25543720
> Its March, and its about the time that everyone starts talking about Prom (This will be relevant).
> College shit is also happening, but parents insisted that I should apply "Just in case you change your mind".
> Letter gradually role in from the seven schools I applied too.
> Get rejected from 5, waitlisted on 1 and accepted into one but got a 20,000 Merit scholarship.
> Not really worried, I had talked to recruiters by this point over the phone and they said they would be willing to give me an option 40 (Ranger Contract)
> Figure "No big deal, I've got my plan, i'm in good shape, i'm gonna make it through RASP and be Ranger guy".
> Go to recruiting office, recruiter asks me a bunch of questions about drugs, criminal record etc.
> I had done my research, I knew what was expected and felt I was in the clear (I never had a criminal record, did drugs or even drank, combination of religious reasons and being introverted.)
> He then asks a massive fucking bombshell.
> "Well Anon you look like a pretty good candidate, next question: Do you have any allergies?"
> Oh fuck, I had a formally life threatening allergy to dairy.
> Time seems to slows down as his words rattle through my head.
> I answered yes, and explained my allergy to him. Tried to tell him that its gotten alot better and its not nearly as bad.
> He nods sympathetically
> Not word for word but "While this would disqualify you from service normally, I suggest you get a RAS test and your medical records together. Your records and a doctors recommendation will be taken into account when the army docs make a decision.
> Get home
> I get out of my car and I get some news from my mom.
> "Anon remember the RAS test that I had you take a few weeks ago for your allergies?" We got the results back today and it was a 4/6. I didn't want to tell yo-".
> I run up to my room and slam the door.
> I wanted to fucking scream but nothing came out. I punched walls, Thinking three words.
>Why God, why?

>>25543701
But like I said. There are not many people who want to put in the amount of effort required. If you're not cut out for it, or you're not willing to put in the work, it will shred your relationship apart mercilessly.

A bad LDR is terrible. It's almost like being diagnosed with AIDS in the 1980s: whatever the future is, it's not getting better so you might as well end it as soon as possible.

A good LDR is amazing. You will be the happiest you've ever been when you're finally together. Every moment will be a memory. You will cherish every second. When you are able to move closer, to see each other every day, you will never want to be away from them.

That's what I have to say about them. But more practical matters:

Yes you will have a lot of sex when you're together. Easy way to earn your red wings, don't be a bitch.
For people who are more introverted or enjoy having lots of personal space, they can honestly be great.
Obviously for some people, cheating is a moral grey area and it's possible to have your cake and eat it, too.

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>>25543726
> Day after bombshell.
> At Lunch listening to edgy Johari music.
> Track: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2SNvxYf1Xkc [Embed]
> Girl I knew from my calculus class touches me on the shoulder.
> "Hey anon, whatya doing?"
> "Oh hey, yeah i'm just killing time, listening to some music rn, what about you?"
> She was one of the popular grills so I was confused why she was talking to me.
> "You going to Prom?"
> "I probably will, but Idk if i'm gonna have a date, probably just go because its senior year and all."
> We just chat for a few mins and she leaves
> I thought about her question that night and was trying to think about who I would take.
> Talk to Noah about it and he asks what about the Turk.
>Gets me to admit I do like her
>He comes up with a plan, he calls it "The Grand Kekaku" (He got the name from JoJo)
> Thinks I should ask her out to Prom and he'll start a indiegogo to fund the thing.
> I think its a stupid plan but he has plenty of experience with kickstarter (he has a business based around it.)
>Grand Kekaku.
>Talking to her, try to be smooth about in, build context by talking about what they do in Turkey at the end of the school year.
> Finally ask her, reveal plan.
> She says yes.
> We end the call shortly after and talk to Noah.
>Tell him it worked and he goes into plan mode, asks me if she's serious about this etc.
> I tell him it shouldn't be an issue, we have well over a month to work out the plan etc.
> Talking to her the day or two after
> Bring it up and ask if she had any questions, I raised the obvious issues and asked if she was serious.
> She said that while she did have feelings for me etc, there was no way it was gonna work.
>Brought up the obvious issues (Explaining it to both our sets of parents, distance, Being in a Muslim country) that I had blindly ignored.
> Admit she was right and I said I needed to get some air.
> Don't talk to her for three days, and coincidentally it rains for those three days.

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>>25543740
> I log into Skype.
> She's left a few messages begging me to understand, explaining whats going on, that she didn't want to hurt me.
> We talk back and forth, I told her I would have rather have her tell me the truth from the beginning and that it would have been easier to take if she had been honest.
> She said she feels bad and that she did care about me.
> I told her that if things were going to work out then I thought we shouldn't talk anymore
> In my mind it was a "Rather be first in village in Gaul then second in Rome" thing.
>Of course I was thinking with my pride and wasn't thinking logically, I un-added her and thought that was that.
> Of course now I feel like an asshole and I don't know if I made the right choice.

I know its a meme to say that she wasn't like the other girls /fit/, but she wasn't like the other girls. I don't know what i'm going to do or how this crazy ride is gonna end but I do know this: You bastards have been with me since the beginning, though good times and bad. All of you, even the Brap posters are my brothers, and I don't know where I would be without you.

I'll leave you anon's with a quote that I've remembered throughout my time here, that I recite whenever I hit a block in the road.

"You're going to be all right. You just stumbled over a stone in the road. It means nothing. Your goal lies far beyond this. Doesn't it? I'm sure you'll overcome this. You'll walk again."

Its been a few months since the events of the Greentext, and this girl is still on my mind. I can't help but think that she was special, or at least she was to me. I know it never would have worked out, but in my eyes no woman has ever come close to what she was to me. She made the dark days seem not so dark, she had a ferocious intellect and passion for everything in the world that I never got over. I may not have fully realized it then, but I loved her, and I still do.

>>25543760
oh wow

any more stories? Advice? Thanks all for the comments.

In one now and it doesn't really matter much to me desu. Feels more like a friendship. Maybe that's just me tho lel

My husband leaves for months at a time to work on boats in the middle of the sea. It's a weird ldr situation because he lives here but we spend the majority of the year apart.

Trust is an obvious must, but if the connection is there it's completely doable.

I should mention I met him on here and he lived states away, but moved here very quickly.

I'm currently in an ldr with someone I met off this board. Can answer a few questions if you want. It's not going to be a very happy story.

>>25544663
Make your own happy story then. LDRs are a thing that can exist for certain people, the rest of you need to move the fuck on.

The world is filled with people worth connecting to, unless you live in the desert or Arizona specifically, go outside and you'll find someone worthwhile.

>>25543258

Had a LDR with a girl who was about 3 hours away. She ended up completely breaking my heart.

If you want my advice: Do video as often as you can. Minimize talking just through text. In text, you're missing the body language and tone, and this person is so important to you that you, you begin reading wrong things into what they say.

If you want more general advice: Just...don't get too attached to them. Don't convince yourself that they're the one. That was my big mistake. The harsh truth is that love isn't enough to overcome distance.

>>25545125
I already did tho :(

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I have been in a ldr with someone I met on soc for a few years now. It's a weird situation, it has so far brought me as much pain as it has brought me joy.

We live on different continents and there is a cultural gap between us, being open minded helps but it's not always enough unfortunately.

She's most likely the woman of my life but I'm not the man of hers. It's difficult to deal with that at times but I'm always hoping that if we do meet things will turn.

If you have any question to an EU citizen who is in a ldr with a NA citizen, I can answer. Also if you guys have any advices on how to relocate there, I'm interested. I have some knowledge but I'm sure there is still a lot to learn.

>>25543258
yeah, dont do them

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>>25543258
number one advice would be to figure out now how it will end - aka who is moving where. even if you're in the first month of dating. if you cant agree on who moves where in a hypothetical we-fall-in-love-and-cant-live-without-each-other scenario, then no matter how long or short, the romance can only end in heartbreak. and trust me, it gets worse the longer you let it go for

no more love stories?