Fuck this depraved cock-rating bullshit. Companionship thread.

I havent fapped in two weeks and I still havent gotten laid. I was told nofap was the key.

>>25349344
Nofap only exists to provide more incentive. Are you actively trying to get laid?

>>25349333
What are your feels, bro? Lay it on me string bean.

>f, 22, central europe
>lots of friends
>pretty smart
>popular with both genders
>good at house chores, decent cook
>hardworking
>crippling trust issues due to horrible past featuring horrible people

How do I get over depressing suicidal thoughts and start living. Right now I'm alive yet I do not feel alive.

>>25350998
Well, that is kind of complicated. Do when you look around, what do you feel you want?

>>25351517
I can't think of anything specific actually.
rn I'm in a very nice relationship. I can't think of any real flaws except my trust issues still being there after 2+ years of dating and 7+ years of friendship...
My dream is to overcome them and trust my bf 100%. It's very demotivating that I don't feel like I've gotten better after a year of actively working on my issues

I'm so depressed and unsatisfied with life. I'm a quarter century old now and I still never had a date. I work in NYC and live close and I still can't even get a tinder match. That's fine... even though it works for all my peers in work and friends irl... but I don't even get people interested on other platforms for dating. I know being desperate or looking too hard won't find you a relarionship. The thing is... I waited months adjusting to a new lifestyle in a new area and still notice the same problem I always did with attracting women once I test the waters again. How do I learn to permanently not care... because seeing my friends talk about the nice things they do with friends makes me sad deep down.

>>25350998
First step is not being a fucking child and actually resorting to seeing a professional about your issues.

>>25351684
I'm seeing a psychologist, I've don so for a year (Prior to that I spent 3-4 months on finding the right one)
I must admit. Now I know how I feel about a lot of things and I've come down to the conclusion that my trust issues roots in low selfworth/selfhate. I am now aware of my problems, but I feel like I've been at a standstill for several months now. I've already talked to my psychologist about this and we're both at a loss since I don't FEEL improvement

>>25351602
Im a guy with the same problem. Amazing relationship but previous partner cheated on me 3 times and lied about it each time.

It took me months to even start feeling progress and it took a lot of help from my partner but Im finally better for the most part. Find help, get support.

>>25351651
Human beings are 'programmed' to reproduce, alas we want some kind of companionship. It's only natural for people in the age of 18-28 to CRAVE for a SO. So please don't feel bad about wanting a companion in any form.
It does indeed sound demotivating to not getting any dates. How often do you go out? How outgoing are you as a person?
Do you radiate(in lack of a better word) happiness when hanging out with other people? Humans are by nature attracted to mood setters. They're interesting, entertaining and we all like to smile and laugh

>>25351706
How long do you think it took for you to feel at ease? Do you feel 100% at ease? If not, do you think you ever will?

>>25349333
Nice trips, man.

Life sucks and everyone sucks. What's the point. Honestly.

>>25351729
I work in Manhattan. I'm out every day. All my friends are back in my home town and whenever we go out it's not like girls are checking me out. I've always been told that my personality is positive and passionate and funny but to be honest, i just feel like I'm never good enough. I try not to let it show and I don't think it does. I definitely know it doesn't for girls online who refuse me on just a superficial level. There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that I'm far from a boring person. My job is interesting, my hobbies. Idk

>>25351744
Afaik people in larger cities are superficial. I don't go out often myself, but when I do I've never done it for checking out boys. I'm not the superficial type neither though.
So idk if girls doesn't check you out because they don't think about it? I'm stereotyping because I got no relevant experience, but if you expect females to check you out while they expect males to be the aggressive ones, it might be a reason why it hasn't worked, physically anyway. Personally I've only ever met males I was interested in through my interests as convo just had a natural flow thereafter.

>>25351738
Life is what you make of it. Some of us just need to be pushed in the right direction at times. Bear with us.
People are interesting

>>25351767
I wish I could get just one tinder match like I'm sure if I got matches and was able to message a girl, a conversation would naturally flow and I'd be able to compare interested and find common ground... but that doesn't happen. And in today's age it's really hard for me to ever approach a girl randomly with no context and ask her favorite what have you or whatever out of the blue. And I presume I'm just not great looking to begin with because of the no matches, so irl approach with confidence seems like a chad only thing right

>>25351773
People are undoubtedly interesting. But they're shitty and spineless and self-serving. Relationships are antiquated unless you want to procreate.

>>25351788
Instead of thinking that you're not attractive, assume there's just that many good looking fellas in NYC. I'm not from the US, so I have this imagination that NYC is full of ridiculously good looking people. Which is hard to compete with on a superficial basis. BUT if you're very confident in your personality, it'll go well.
Ofcourse, I can't guarantee it, I'm yet another anon on the chan. I just hope sharing my thoughts brings another perspective on your issue.

>>25351802
That depends on the person.
>INDIVIDUALITY
My very good friend lives for the concept of companionship. The purpose of his existence is only complete with significant other. His drive inspires me and at the same time, it scares me

>>25351822
Hes incompletr and seeks something from being with another. Thats exactly what im describing; self-seeking. You should be scared. Hes probably got serious problems hes dealing with

>>25351838
I don't want to share details of his person, granted the fact that I am anonymous. It's personal, and we can agree to not agree.
I am only scared because I do not understand his purpose of life completely. Lack of knowledge naturally lead to anxiety and/or curiosity.

>>25351822
This problem has persisted over the corse of 4 years in multiple states... not just NYC. Considering my friends success with the app and also colleagues in NYC, I honestly believe it is my looks and even though I'm not ugly, I'm just not even remotely physically atttacrive. It breaks my heart I can't fix it :(

>>25351729
Ill always be dealing with the subconscious thoughts that come from suffering a breach of trust like that, for me it was a matter of finding a healthy outlet. I generally do something productive until the feeling of my accomplishment outweighs the other bad shit.

>28/m
>Had a 3 year relationship up until two years ago
>Shit ended up being toxic and she broke up with me 4 times; she couldn't make her mind
>I didn't accept her returning after the 4th time, never talked to again
>Two years in, I moved and I'm currently undergoing therapy; not exactly fit to have a gf unless they're willing to put up with my bullshit
It saddens me I'm unable to have a gf, but knowing that I will get better makes it more bearable.

If anything I haven't had any friends since I moved and it kinda feels lonely.

>>25352220
what are your interests?

>>25352344
Um, tabletop games/roleplaying games, video games (tons of Pokemon but also other things), IT because I studied compsci, and in general most nerdy things. I also do aikido, although sports aren't among my biggest interests. And I like talking a lot about general (and not so general) knowledge about most things.

>>25352394
What's your preferred method of communication? We share all those interests

>>25352451
Honestly, none. Now, don't feel bad - I'm just super anxious and scared. My therapist even suggested me to not try socializing for the time being until we've done some progress with therapy.

>27/M/US
>Been single almost 5 years now
>The time alone helped me to get to know myself better and not feel anxious about being lonely
>Interested in dating again
>Would like to meet folks, but can't seem to find a good place to do that
>Doesn't help that I'd rather have a relationship rather than some random hookup at a bar
>I know internet dating is a thing. But Tinder seems to be for random flings, and Okcupid has pulled in nothing from the bit I've used it

Not really sure where to go from here in general

>>25352480
At your age I would just keep going about my business til I find the right person. Under 30 it's hard to find a woman who wants to settle into a groove and stay that way

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yeahah companionship peeps! hi yall :3

>>25351602
I'm late to this but just trust 100% regardless of doubt. just do it- but build up a avenue of thought to keep in the back of your mind that believes in no one can be trusted. kind of like just a back-up psyche to turn to in the event of the worst. "never put all your eggs in one basket" type of thing. I think that's the key.

This thread seems to be more about bitching and less about companionship

i will be your shy introverted bf

add OctoberSong

my friend died. He was 21. I just got back from the funeral and I'm feeling really down.

I'm sad and lonely and don't feel like a priority in my relationship. I worry about the fact I feel like I don't care. But I also have OCD and intrusive thoughts about my relationship.

>>25354716
I've been there before.
I had severe OCD when I was about 17/18, which presented as intrusive thoughts bordering on psychotic.
Honestly if you're not on meds I would recommend them. I take clompiramine, and clonezapam, and they've made the intrusive thoughts go away completely.

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This may not be the place, but I'm just going to dump a rant.

Reasons to despair:

I despair because of an inability to connect with those around me. I've never had a friend that I could consider close, nobody that "has my back". The friends I have currently are friendships that continue on because of the time already put into them, or because of proximity and convenience. We've gone to the same schools, or enjoyed things like Pokemon and League of Legends. Our friends were friends, so we became friends. We share a sense of humour. But in terms of time spent together, an explicit personal connection, an understanding and indulgence in one another's hobbies and ambitions and life goals, absolutely nothing. I've even learned recently that these friends are succumbing to moral degeneracy and shameful behavior. I'm perfectly content to give my time and assistance and advice to others, but I can't say the same has ever been done for me. I don't overextend myself, and I'm more than capable of standing up for myself if I suspect someone to be taking advantage of my good-will, but it's still a frustrating position to be in. I find myself indulging in a gift-giving mentality in search of friendship and appreciation, but it's rarely reciprocated in anyway that gives me true fulfillment. This problem extends further when considering the search for new friends that don't have any of the previously described problems. Since starting College, I've done my best to seek out individuals that may share my interests and passions and ambitions, but have only come up disappointed. I live a very lonely existence that doesn't bother me until I actually think about it, then it becomes soul-crushing. As if it wasn't merely enough to simply 'not be friends' with the vast majority of people my age that I encounter, I have also begun to look at these people with contempt.

1/?

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>>25356467

So many youth live disgusting, depraved lifestyles, indulging themselves in revolting deviancy, self-hatred, and a celebration of political ignorance and illiteracy. Another depressing, but less urgent problem is that of a successful and stable relationship. If even platonic relationships with other men and women are so difficult to come across, how slim must the chances be to develop something romantic with a woman who takes care of herself, acts with self-respect and decency, and is prone to accept and mold to my own principles and ambitions (such as having a family)? It's out of the question.

.
.
.

I despair because, despite recognizing the 'good' of the free market, unregulated enterprise, and invidualist Capitalism, my heart and soul still have deep qualms about their implications on our society, and my life. First and foremost, these systems have, since their inception, reduced Man to nothing more than a singular economic atom, measured by nothing else than what skills he brings to the market, and how much profit he can create for his employer, or himself, if he is self-employed. I have never, and most likely never will understand the obession with profit that has arisen out of the last three centuries and the behaviors that this frenzied hunger for profit results in. It has created, or is greatly responsible for the creation of, a soulless, empty, and unmotivated populace, escaping into the vices of the degenerate behaviors described previously, or succumbing to despair, depression, inaction, apathy, or even suicide

2/?

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>>25356471

Two decades of robotic and collectivist public education sap countless hours of childhood development and freedom in the interests of giving every individual the tools they need to make lots of profit for their bosses and succeed in an increasingly competitive job market, for increasingly stagnant wages, so that they can provide for themselves in an increasingly expensive world, engineered by the forces of financial speculation, deliberate inflation, and a ceaseless hunger for profit, more shekels, whatever the cost. The amount of time I have wasted in this system, 8 hours a day, for 5 days a week, for 12 years being forced to do work that never helped me or interested me to master skills I have no interest in or need for is nothing short of outright robbery and the celebration of this system is utterly criminal. I have no interest in the career path I'm currently set on (Finance) and everything I have ever demonstrated a passion for and an interest in (Politics, Geopolitics, Government, History, European History, Medieval History, Classical Art) is simply unpopular and not viable to pursue as a career. Even on the slim chance I could find a fruitful, successful career in these venues, it is extremely far off, as I still have to go through University for a 4-year degree at the very minimum, potentially needed a Masters or more for certain positions and sectors of employment. The cost of this is worrying. Until then I'm being pressured into sacrificing the time I'm not spending at College, or working on various assignments and projects from College, to work for demeaning, unfulfilling, and decidedly unrewarding low-wage labor. If minimum-wage legislation wasn't a thing, I'd be forced into accepting even lower wages, as I have no negotiating power whatsoever with the qualifications I currently have.

3/?

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>>25356473

There's no room to negotiate a fulfilling and rewarding wage at ordinary Fast-food restaurants, grocery stores, gas stations, etcetera, as the skills required for those positions are widespread. I can't imagine what life must be like for the unfortunate many that are forced into accepting these positions because their survival depends on it. I'm very fortunate to not have that urgency, though my family is making it more and more clear that I am expected to work. Even the thought of working for an exceptionally high-wage in a sector that I'm not interested in is depressing and unmotivating. I simply have no motivation to continue a slow march forwards to what I perceive to be an unfulfilling life. How anyone else deals with it or simply accepts such a miserable existence is beyond me. Perpetual suffering for shekels, letting you pay rent and buy food so you live to suffer for more shekels. If you're lucky you might even be able to afford some amenity that makes things slightly less shit so you feel happier about making shekels for your boss and you don't kill yourself, because if you did, then you couldn't make shekels for your boss, and god forbid his shekel output suffers. It just disgusts me how everything is tied to one's capacity to produce shekels. It wasn't like this in the past, and this is partly hwy I am so drawn to fantasy film and literature and medieval history. Of course people are still working, and of course money and trade and employment still exist, it just doesn't seem like some central, looming, presence in Man's life. It is a means to leisure and a carefree life, rather than an End, this End being a drone trapped in a perpetual cycle of profitmaking, slowly saving up for a retirement so that they don't die in discomfort.

4/?

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>>25356476

My third and final pillar of despair borrows partially from what was discussed first. The population trends of the last three centuries, and the state that the Western World finds itself in is absolutely horrific. It's a dying animal that needs to be put down already. Most nearly every individual growing up in the West is subjected to an endless stream of Marxist and Egalitarian propaganda from the minute they're born. The celebration of deviancy, cultural self-flaggelation, racial guilt, hatred for traditional social structures and hierarchies (especially that of the traditional family), and hatred for a racial and ethnic identity, and shared history makes me feel physically ill. So few individuals of any worth exist anymore. Though I have resisted these pressures myself, it is still depressing to watch the vast majority of people welcome them with open arms. The axioms of the status-quo are immovable and permanent: an inane celebration of Lockean equality, a love of Democracy, and a rejection of all other political systems as evil or inadequate, pursuing progress for progress' sake. I despair that these will never be overcome or overturned ever again. Even those individuals categorized by the Left and the Media as 'far-right' are constrained into operating under platforms of civic-nationalism, sexual egalitarianism, valuing Democracy and Republicanism, universal suffrage, etc. Marine Le Pen or Donald Trump or Nigel Farage, or other 'anti-globalists' will never save the world, the best they can do is temporarily halt or slow the even more destructive trends propagated by their opposition. The demographic and political realities of the future make me not want to live in it, nor subject my children to such a hell-on-earth.

5/?

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>>25356481

Everything is horrid, and the only solace I have lies in my books, and careful study of the Past. Liberalism is a death cult. Capitalism is a death cult. Modernism is a death cult. We deserve to be consumed by eternal Hellfire for the depravity and emptiness we have brought to the world, and I only pray that it comes soon.

6/6

I'm turning 25 soon and all the people I know are starting to get into some serious relationships. I haven't been one to really want too much of a relationship bit I'm now getting these deep feelings of despair just from the thought of being alone. The most important thing to me is being able to have in depth discussions about shit with my partner and feeling that deep connection. I'm basically terrified of putting myself out there because of a fear of rejection. I'm hoping this feeling passes but I'm not sure what do with this crushing feeling.

>>25354523
my condolence anon :c

I hope you are doing what you want with your life, because as you can see, it can be short.

>>25356666
those quads don't bode well.

I still believe in you tho.

>>25356467
>>25356471
>>25356473
>>25356476
>>25356481
>>25356483
You just described what being alive is (to most of us). To pretend that you have it any worse than most is absurd. Life has no meaning. You must make your own meaning. If you get stuck looking for meaning in life you will find none unless you placed it there. What comes to you through the years of your life will be the product of your work to get to where you want to be.

If you hate yourself, that's your problem. If you hate yourself, you're inviting everyone else to hate you, even if they don't take you up on it.

Everything comes down to you.

If you do nothing, you will die nothing. There are no excuses.

>>25349333
I'm sorry you have an ugly dick anon

I don't have friends,
just want to hang out with someone and go to the movies or even just chat.
screwed up all the friendships I ever had and now I've got no-one to talk to.

>>25351788
Think of what life was like in the days before internet.
You fuckers think it's hard getting a match now? Phhh
Fuck you, you lazy bastards. Quit the boo hooing and go talk to the first qt at the library.
Pro tip: there was almost never any qt at a library. Yet we had next to nowhere else to go.

M 21 Louisiana

I'm working a menial full time job at my local grocery store and living with my parents. I went to highschool out of state and I'm not going to collage so I don't really have anyfriends in town other than my coworkers and I'm to nervous to seek out a girlfriend because I'm embarrassed that I still live with my parents. I'm relatively introverted so I'm mostly okay with this lifestyle but as time goes on the loneliness is creeping up on me further and further. There are some nights where I get home after work and just feel like a pathetic piece of shit for hours. I feel like the only chance I have to help myself is to get a new job that would give me a new social circle and enough pay to move into an apparement but that isn't exactly easy to come by.

Sorry if that was a boring read, it just felt good to get it out.

>>25356678
Thanks :)
And yeah I'm trying, I'm working towards what I want. That said my friend made his own life shorter then it needed to be, by ending it by his own hand

>>25357989
Holy shit, literally describing my life 6 years ago.

Alright, so I don't know if this is advice, or just empathizing here, but here goes. I did like the same thing as you. Moved back to a small town, knew no one in town, went back home just getting online and losing myself in internet groups. Got super depressed about a year into it all. Got some therapy and help. Got a new job. Still didn't date anyone, but I grew to know myself and become more comfortable being single. Didn't even get my own place until last year.

So idk, like, it sucks ass and it's hard. But even if it takes a bit, you'll get through it. Just know I'm rooting for you. Also, maybe look into a new job either with a bigger coworker base, or in a new bigger location, (or one with enough money to maybe move out)

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>>25350998
Just hard for me to have any sympathy for you with all you've got. Good luck, things seem to be going well for you and will likely only get better.

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>Been alone all my life
>finally hit wizard mode this year
> went back to school to try and better myself
>now I have debt and no drive to finish this last semester
>overweight
>tried counseling but it was just talk, and talking about it did help, but that was half a year ago, and now in the same slump
>fuck school

stoned as fuck.

let me uplift you.

i've done everything i can to not become a fat disgusting piece of shit human. and all i can see for miles are fat disgusting men who are obsessed with their own penises. where are the sexy guys who give a shit about accomplishing goals and arent always out to bust a nut

>>25350998
drop some lsd and youll find the answer. you are gonna relive your past traumas but now in a safe enviroment where you can do whatever you want: YOUR MIND

>>25362562
at the places where people dont go hunting holes to fill with their semen ;)

>>25362591
isnt that literally everywhere for men?

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I met a girl on her in a Kik thread for about a year ago. We started talking and instantly become very close to eachother. It didn't take long before we started developing feelings for eachother and we realized how much we needed eachother in our lives. I'd never had such feelings for someone as I did with her and she felt the same about me. We promised eachother that we'd be together forever and soon meet eachother. She made my life so much better and gave me motivation to work hard. Even though we were talking over Line it felt like we were close and had known eachother for years. She was the person that knew everything about me and I knew everything about her. I had finally found someone who love...

Now it's been a month since I last heard from her. She just stopped responding in the middle of the conversation. The messages aren't read and I'm almost certain I'm not blocked. Loosing her has changed my life. I constantly feel empty and lost all my motivation again. All I think about is her and what happened to her. Even if she for some reason decided that she doesn't want me anymore, I want to know and not live without knowing what happened.
Please Tashi I can't live without you...