Tea Time Who needs to talk? Whats going on in our lives that

Honestly, don't even know anymore if I'm crazy. Therapist says only depression and anxiety but I feel like I have some mental illness, I get like 5-10 mood swings during the day.

>>25205914
I was thinking borderline personality or bipolar or something else

It's like therapist don't even listen to what I'm saying they just say 'no you don't have it you are normal' but no additional test or anything like that

I just want to know what the fuck is wrong with me and how to live with it

I sometimes also have like out of body experiences or I can 'feel' the magic or smthng I know rationally that it's not real but I still see and feel it

My best/only friend killed himself on Thursday.

>>25205945
Why? How?

Hold on there anon

>>25205914
>>25205926
>>25205940
This is a little intense, I understand you feeling bizarre, but that doesn't mean you're suffering from BPT or Bipolar. If you're not satisfied with your diagnosis I'd absolutely suggest you find another doctor if you're feeling like this one isn't best for you. Mental health care is unfortunately trial and error and you may have to see several people before you find one you can jive with.

>>25205945
Thats pretty intense, I'm sorry to hear. Have you been able to talk about it? Are you seeing anyone or is there family members of theirs you can speak with?

>>25205808
What's your favorite tea? Drink?

>>25206060
I prefer black teas generally, but I do enjoy blends. Greens are also quite good, and I can enjoy white teas when prepared correctly.

>>25206072
You like theanine, so do I. China makes good flavored ones. Yet to see anything close. Now white tea is something I do t drink too often. Green is also good.

>>25206086
It synergizes well with caffeine so its always a good combo. White tea can be a fickle mistress, it can be incredibly smooth and have a great aroma, but can be hard to get right when brewing. White blends are a better option.

>>25206100
I have to drink coffee throught the day or I feel poopy sometimes. It depends on the bean as well. I'm kinda lazy right now but I want to fix a nice coffee maker I got from a trash can. Rare find.

I appreciate your knowledge.

>>25206106
Do you know how to solder or anything about motherboards? Thats a common issue with coffee makers. What kind is it?

File: seitl_mit-tassen_01.jpg (71KB, 700x700px) Image search: [Google]

71KB, 700x700px

>>25206152
I'll snap a pic for you but not today. It's 1 am on my watches.

Pic is similar but I think I have a better one.

I once soldered a CPU but I think I know more than that. And you're right capacitors are the problem. You're weird.

I hate my ex cuz he is successful and I hate his friendship with random guys from my city who r just weed junkies my ex also became successful cuz of drugs and shit
Yet here I am just resting on not going out and living the lame life of a gay nerd while my ex is having alot of sex and doing drugs and he is only 21

I think I can't get over him cuz he was the first guy I feel in love with when I was 16 and he was 14

>>25205980
I don't know why he did it, I can't make any sense out of it. I know it's generic to say, but I really didn't see it coming at all. He was always saying that he can't wait for the future and always saying how successful he was gonna be. He constantly asked what my plans for life were and always tried to push me to not give up. He's the one that talked me out of killing myself, he gave me reasons to stay (that I'll stick by), he said so many times how stupid/selfish suicide was and he truly was not the type of person to dwell on depressing subjects. As for how, he shot himself.
>>25206006
I've talked about it with my 'internet' friends, but he truly was my only IRL friend. The only other person I talk to in person, doesn't really give a shit, which I don't fault him for because he never gives a shit about anything besides himself so it's not too surprising. I'm afraid to see his family, I don't know what to say. The funeral is Wednesday and I'll be seeing them then, but I'm at a loss for words. I struggle pretty hard to make connections in person, so holding conversations with people is really difficult and with the subject matter I feel like it's nearly impossible for me.

>>25206165
Thats a fancy god damn coffee machine right there... Haha, why am I weird? I used to be a helicopter mechanic, so I have an inherent desire to know how things work.

>>25206167
He's a successful drug dealer? I don't quite understand what being a gay nerd has to do with not wanting to go out. IS it because you might run into him in your circle of friends?

>>25206217
This is a tough life situation, I really have no experience with what you're dealing with, so I feel as though my advice is not exactly useful, but I suppose I would say you just need to find ways of expressing yourself to people in the real world. I think you might need to go see a therapist or counselor. You need to discover a way to purge your feelings in a constructive manner. Suicide I think is something that bridges many planes. You always hear about it being a cry for help, or people having signs, but I have heard on many occasions of spontaneous suicide, sometimes people become so overwhelmed in such a short period they can no longer deal with reality, its a possibility this individual experienced some sort of emotional shock. I'm sorry to hear you've lost your friend, but if you want to get over it you need to explore yourself and find a way to reconcile your aversion to making connections.

>>25206255
Yeah he is not a drug dealer he is a singer but he is into that drug junkies and not so junkies successful gays circles and I could belong there but just because he is my ex I don't let myself socialize with him or his group of friends everything is awkward and I keel having ugly boyfriends who I try to take advantage of

>>25206255
>Thats a fancy god damn coffee machine right there... Haha, why am I weird? I used to be a helicopter mechanic, so I have an inherent desire to know how things work.

Why used to? What do now?

What coffee maker do you have? Ice used pot and brewed it myself. It is fancy and possibly good. You feel weird. I don't really know why.
Helicopters are hard to fly.

>>25206006
I'm 24, been going to therapists on-off since I was 12 -.-
No progress what so ever, I'd even say it's getting worse but noooo they always say you seem better no matter what I say... Is it maybe because I'm a kinda good looking girl so they just see how I look and don't really listen??
Also I started to talk less about my problems because it seems they just don't care

>>25206915
Aaand new ID ofc

>>25206915
I went through that once upon a time. I like to talk to strangers about their lives. It helps me be creative while I play music. If you want a friend to listen and offer advice get a hold of me. Kik is probablyasadist.

This is the first night is almost a month that I haven't been drunk. Life feels like there's too much haooening right now.

Everything is going right and I want to kill myself