roast thread roast me

>>24691029
Blind bitch

>>24691030
Spoiled little whore

>>24691030
Not real

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>>24691029
Aviators only work if you're in Top Gun. Who tf has aviators as their real glasses? They need to be sunglasses.

Hold up lemme put on my angry scowl for 4chan..it makes me look more sexy.

Did u take this picture with your tablet? Are you at your grandparents house? Why is there a hand rail in the shower?

This is the ideal potato. You may not like it but this is what peak performance looks like.

>>24691098
Obviously on the chubby side. Uses dark clothes to mask how fat you actually are.

Too shy to smile so you half assedly stuck your tongue out.

I don't know how to phrase this but your face just looks soft. Like you've never had to work for anything.

I can almost guarantee you are very active on tumblr.

All in all i would wanna fuck. Kik: LukeBallantineBennet

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>>24691098
agree with other poster about looking overweight

>>24691029
damn dude get new glasses plz

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>>24691165
They're sunglases,

>>24691266
Can't tell. Aviators only work if they're reflective. And why are you wearing sunglasses inside??

>>24691029
Bono wears sunglasses inside too. He's also a cunt.

>>24691317
I wear them everywhere

>>24691352
please stop

>>24691098
Is it okay that you make my penis very erect?

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>>24691029
you look like you're trying to pull off the stern look but it just ain't working

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>>24691030
way too cute. KYS.

>>24691098
copper cab

>>24692360
you look like an alt-right blogger

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>>24691029
Just fucking turn yourself in for all them schools you shot up boy, with those glasses it'll be hard to convince them it wasn't you.

>>24691030
Maybe if you opened your fucking eyes you'd stop using filters to make yourself feel better about your looks, that dress isn't sexy, its just sad.

>>24691098
How many fucking bites does it take you to eat your fucking dinner you mouse mouth having cunt? Quit trying to be Violet from your Incredibles Fanfic and get some fucking sun.

>>24691240
Ah, the "I'm gonna pose in front of some urban art to make myself look cultured and artsy" Picture. And that outfit, are you trying to dress yourself for the first time or are you on some knock off gaming YouTube channel?

>>24691347
Whether this is a fake picture or not, falling in love? Is that what is says on your shirt? Sorry to break it to you but it's going to take more than one guy to love that. Stop spray tanning yourself and actually put some fucking effort into doing something for once in your miserable life.

>>24692338
Hey Harold, where's Kumar? Get straight A's all down the board? Didn't get that 9-5 broker job you wanted? Why don't you take a goddamn minute, sit down and fucking loosen up a little. The only thing that isn't tight on you is your fucking asshole, Faggot.

>>24692360
Knock it the fuck off with these "I'm so deep and emotional" black and white pictures. No matter how hard you try, no girl is going to fucking love you wearing fucking suspenders like that you hipster cunt. Clean up your fucking face, fix your hair, and get a fucking job.

>>24692380
Smile all you want fucker, you won't be for long. The only right decision you made in your life was growing that fucking beard to hide your weak ass chin. Those glasses aren't helping you out on your round ass face either. Pro tip, stop watching My Little Pony, man up.

Cont.

>>24692481
Cont.

>>24692406
And finally. This fucker. Unless you're getting on your knees and sucking my dick, stop with the fucking filter. You're not cute. No filter could ever fucking fix that mess.And the Nike camo style went out fucking years ago, keep up with the trends and maybe you wouldn't have to try so hard to get noticed. Do yourself a favor as well, go get a good, well paying job with benefits. So you can fix those fucking jacked up teeth of yours. I don't know if those are the "fuck me" eyes or if it's the "I'm missing a few chromosomes" stare. Get some fucking Proactive, redo your entire room, and please, PLEASE take a fucking shower. I can fucking see my reflection in the grease of your hair through my screen.


Go ahead men and women. Point out some shit I don't know. I'm ready.

>>24692481
you look non threatening. im not going to go off on an autistic tangent but i would never bet on you in a fight

>>24691029
Are you Daniel brühl?

>>24692481
The hero this thread needs.

>>24692481
holy shit youre gorgeous

>>24693609
nah

>>24693758
jfc, agreed.

>>24691347
this bitch so fat she took up two pictures.

>>24695375
Good roast m8

>>24695417
let me guess your black boyfriend just dumped you?

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>>24692481
>>24693758
>>24694399
Fixed

Get ready for the second coming, cunts.

>>24692493
One, that's not a roast. It's just straight up fact. I wouldn't bet on me either. But looking through these others, it's the best I'm gonna get.

>>24693621
>>24693758
>>24694399
>>24695698
AND you four. Holy shit, are you people blind or just retarded? This is a ROAST thread, if I wanted to hear how beautiful I am I would have gone into those conniving cam whore threads where people rarely ever post a picture of them selves for people to rate because they know an actual picture will bring responses like mine and drive them to suicide. They get one little hard on from compliments to pictures that aren't even theirs. I know I'm beautiful, so stop sucking my dick, unless you're actually going to let me bust a fucking load on your face. And ROAST ME.

>>24695417
OH boy. First, stop fucking smiling. It's making me feel like I'm about to wake up in your fucking trunk 40 mils away from my fucking house. Second, holy shit, I bet your voice is so fucking nasally because you need to use fucking echolocation to navigate the fucking world with eyes that fucking small. Is that a fucking necklace with your name on it? Why, In case your fucking brain is as small as your eyes are and you forget your own fucking name? Or better yet for when you go clubbing with the girls and you get so drunk so you can forget how pathetic your loveless life is and don't have to make any small talk when a guy blasted on about 16 coronas comes up and doesn't have a line for you he just points out your fucking name necklace and you two fuck in the club bathroom. My lord, I could go on and fucking on. Your lack of tits, your eye brows, your skin, your color choice of clothing, your hair. My god your fucking hair. AND speaking of which. Do you have any sense of self fucking care? Does the carpet match the drapes? Because from the look of those feelers on your fucking ear lobe. I take it you don't fucking shave much.

>>24697510
What happened to the "men don't hurt me because I mistake thick skin for fat" bitch?

>>24691098
tomoko, is it u?

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You fucking degenerates are unable to roast me.

>>24692481
Alright ravioli, first up came here to read roasts not essays, it doesn't matter how many times you can twist around the same insult it's still the same fucking insult. Jesus, I know you love suffering but how masochist do you want to go "roast me guys roast me geuuugh" gives you more of a rock solid than the cam whore threads?

Boy is it lucky you look like Jesus cos you seem like the kind of cunt who's only worthwhile being nailed to a cross

>>24691029
Why do you look like yung lean

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>>24691029
you look like Jim Cornette's more retarded brother

>pic related is Jim Cornette

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roast me faggots

>protip: you can't

>>24698272
Chemo doesn't work on cancerous personalities

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You look like Hunter S Thompson if he had a full head of hair