About to fail exams because brainlet, any medfags can tell me

>>8923780
I've failed my M.Sc, look up "exit bag".

>>8923780
Helium tank. Connect it to mask with some medical tubing. Make sure the flow rate of the Helium is about the same pressure as your exhale. Your brain can't destinguish between helium and oxygen. You won't feel a thing.

>>8923780
Jump off a cliff while strangling yourself.

>>8923780

Commit suicide by working 50 years in construction slowly deteriorating your body until you die.

>>8923780
Breath

>>8923785
>>8923794
Don't buy consumer helium for party balloons, it's blended with oxygen to prevent people from killing themselves with it.

You'll have to go to a welding supply store for a tank of pure helium (or nitrogen, which is much cheaper and will work just as well).

>>8923780
How much are you willing to commit and get stuff if you don't have it?If you are just gonna sit there , drink a lot and bleed out.

Have a bottle of whiskey and a pack of cigarettes every day.

>>8923780
don't do it man,
life is beautiful.

>>8923780
Don't do it because it just makes no sense. In the grand scheme of things, you failing your exams won't doom you to a miserable life. If you aren't getting kicked out of the school then just take summer classes or retake the classes next semester.

>>8925839
This. take a step back in your perspective and look at your life as a whole, you're gonna be fine.

Another thing, you becoming a hobo or being completely successful only matters if you think it does.

>>8923780
I just passed my third med year with only a week's revision each year. Feels good.

File: philosopher.jpg (55KB, 563x548px) Image search: [Google]

55KB, 563x548px

Long term solution for a short term problem. I dropped out in my first year, threw away 4 years of my life playing videogames with 0 to show for it, and I still managed to crawl out of my hole, start over and get a phd position.

I was an epic fuckup, complete r9k tier, and things still turned around for me, so whatever you do don't think suicide is the correct option.

>get in bathtub

>open drain

>fill tub to the top with salt/sugar mixture

>pack it in tight around you

>die in agony over hours, listening to the sound of all the liquid in your body slowly trickle down the drain

>you're cured!

>>8926039
jesus lmao

>>8923780
How the fuck do you fail medicine?
There's literally no calculations involved and it just requires memory.

If you're a brainlet, you're a brainlet on a whole different scale.

>>8926087
>this reading comprehension
>calling other people brainlet
This can't be real.

>>8926096
But it is real because it's real life you fucking brainlet.

>>8926105
Relax, I just underestimated your stupidity. Now I know better. Don't embarass yourself any further.

>>8926111
Okay, brainlet.

>>8926118
u brainlet

>>8923909
Nitrogen will feel like suffocating, helium is the way to go, and if you're going out, why even spare money ?

just live with no fucks given. don't hurt anyone, just live cheap and stick around. it's worth seeing where shit ends up. eventually you will see those "oh shit" moments.

>>8926509
>Nitrogen will feel like suffocating
Why? It's an inert gas just the same as helium is.

>>8925989
but did you ever get a gf

>>8928176
You can if you're a med student and look decent.

What happens if you tell the uni that you're seriously considering suicide if you fail your exams?