Why is morning sperm hotter?

Because you're relaxed from a good night's sleep.

>>8396350
Actually, this is a sign of penile cancer. It's most likely terminal anon, I'm very sorry.

Since you spend all your nights getting fucked in the ass, the pendulum motion of your testicles adds some mechanical energy into your sperm, finally heating your semen up by a small but measurable effect. Enough, at least, for your estranged girlfriend to notice after you've come home from the "bar" i.e. bath house.

Hey guys I have a girlfriend
/thread

>>8396350
Is her semen as hot as yours? Maybe it's your heating.

>>8396350
The sperm is within the roche limit of earth, so plastically deforms as tidal forces act on it. Since the sperm cannot escape their orbital velocidensity level, they instead increase in temperature. This effect is more pronounced at night as the moon only exists at night and has an effect of offsetting the earths gravitational centre

because your body temperature is colder

>>8396350
The evolutionary purpose of the scrotum is to refrigerate your sperms. Covering up with a blanket negates that purpose and makes your semen too hot and not gelatinous like it's supposed to be.

>>8396350
>over
>not inside

absolutely disgusting

>>8396498
/thread

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>>8396350
25yo virgin here.

PLASE SOME GIRL CONDUCT THESE EXPERIMENTS WITH ME

>>8396350
I don't believe you have a girlfriend.

Enjoy your sperm.

>>8396423
I'm in physical geology 401. This is correct

>>8396407
Hey guys, I'm insecure that an anon showed the normalcy of having a sexual intimate relationship in my safe space away from chads
/post

>>8396350
Oh wow! You had SEX! Congratulations!

Just kidding.

Having sex is literally the most basic, desperate, tragic, hopelessly-void-of-meaning, outrageously obnoxious, troublesome, costly, and downright pointless cry for help that the universe has ever screamed. Wow, you were born as an objectively good looking, decent looking, or perhaps borderline acceptable member of your species. WOW! INCREDIBLE! You managed to procure a willing (which in evolutionary terms, willing translates roughly to "fucking desperate for at least a few reasons") mate and managed to somehow perform the act of intercourse with her! WOW! This his literally only been taking place for HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF FUCKING YEARS! WOW! Except guess what, you probably wore a condom... which means you failed at submitting yourself to an act which means absolutely nothing. The only thing left to do now is kill yourself.

>>8396350
Her boddy is colder at morning so your cummies feel hotter, also post pics of slut

>>8396886
Do not call her that.

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>>8396892
slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut slut s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t s l u t

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>>8396852

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Why even bother with studying when you can chase cuties.
The world is made for cool people to succeed.
Work smart lads, not hard.

>>8396350
Semen is stored in the testes partly because the temperature of the testes is normally lower, around 24 I believe, (when you're walking around and stuff) than your body temperature. If you've been sleeping in a bed under blankets and shizz you're testes may warm up to body temperature so your sperm does as well.

>>8396350
Sheet cover / blanket

>>8396358
>>8396494
It's essentially a combination of these two effects as well as increased momentum, and hence increased force, and hence increased energy, due to the relativistic effects generated by your girlfriend's mass.

>>8396892

Fucking slut

>>8396852
Here we can spot the salty guy who can get no girls, and try to rationalize people who can.

There is no way around it, the desire to get pussy is biologically imprinted in everyone. There is no way to go avoid the simple fact that you are a failure at serving yourself at your basic biological needs.

>>8396892
fucking roastie slag slut

>>8397092
This is a very shorthand version of the most likely right answer. I just graduated with a PhD in biology.

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>>8397545
>There is no way to go avoid the simple fact that you are a failure at serving yourself at your basic biological needs.
Absolutely this.
Failing to get laid and settling for a barely passable female specimen is failing at life.

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>>8397582
>I just graduated with a PhD in biology.
>>>/x/

>>8397585
Hey probably it makes my guesses more educated and based than yours.

>>8397591
I do plumbing.
Most of my work is mathematics.
I have to sit down and work my ass off with topological manifolds when dealing with bathrooms and kitchens.
I can multiply [math]3x3[/math] matrices in my head in a few seconds.
My digit span is [math]10[/math].

>>8396350
No thats not true my boyfriend's semen has always the same temperature. My alpha male tounge doesnt lie. No homo.

>>8396852
>Except guess what, you probably wore a condom... which means you failed at submitting yourself to an act which means absolutely nothing
Not OP, but my condom broke this last time with my fwb, she isn't on the pill FUCK. 10% chance of being father.

>be scientist
>spend 1000000 hours perfecting my research
>cant even procreate

wasted genetics

>>8397670
Did you make her take a morning after pill?

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>>8397545
>the desire to get pussy is biologically imprinted in everyone.
>There is no way to go avoid the simple fact that you are a failure at serving yourself at your basic biological needs.

>Fulfilling the basest animal motives
>Good
Wew lad

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>>8398144
Casual protected sex is an animal vulgarity that people partake in because stupid people make their lives exciting and enjoyable in stupid ways - and the dynamics of the fear of rejection and the motive of sexual gratification make casual sex very exciting for stupid people that can't see how ridiculous their motives are. There is also peer pressure; like how when you were 12 there was massive pressure to go and kiss girls for status - is kissing prepubescent girls a basic biological need? No, it's just peer-pressure in a hilarious age that thinks casual sex and sentimental relationships are the keys to happiness. And is acceptance among one’s peers a basic biological need? In human evolution it obviously determined survival, but it is not a good thing nowadays because independence is a civilized virtue, and obedience is an animal trait. So one has many choices between being a brute and being civilized.

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>>8398145
Unwin has done studies on how monogamy benefits civilizations, and we can see from countless individual cases that chastity (not virginity) is beneficial to people who want to achieve great things in the arts and science. It's not too mysterious why that is either.
If a person has a steady relationship with regular sex there is no motive of jealousy, no time wasted on the weekly chase after sex at a bar or nightclub and their time is mostly spent working.
If a person renounces sex altogether, they escape the timesinks of jealousy and the weekend chase after casual sex, but they also put an end to their bloodline which is something which might detract from mental stability and thus undermine what might have been one of the motives. And to be clear, I approve of sexual relations in monogamous relationships, which don't necessarily have to be marriage; but casual sex and going out to clubs to try bring some tarted up whore home is degrading to humanity.
It's a childish argument to just go 'HAHAHA VIRGIN' or 'MUH BIOLOGICAL NEEDS': it just shows you have bought into the new narrative being pushed by media the past 40+ years.

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>>8398149
Remember fellas, pair-bonding is what's important in relationships with the opposite sex; that's why people get weird in later life when they are not in a relationship, and it's why you have a bunch of unfulfilled idiots who get similarly weird because they can't go from woman to woman anymore, or they settled down with the most attractive woman they could instead of the most attractive woman that was similar to them.

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>>8398151
t. guy who wasted the majority of his time from 15-19 chasing after girls, has had a steady gf for the past four years, and only now sees what a fucking waste of time it all was.
Also, anyone else in a long-term relationship notice how your sex-drive seems to go away after the first 2 and a half years?

>>8398161
A second that, new releationship sex is a blast.

>>8396423
The moon's existence is not conditional, but is most visible at night. It's tidal affect can occur at any time of the day.

>>8396350
Assuming this isn't a troll, I'll give you a real answer (read: educated guess). It's probably got something to do with circadian fluctuations in body-temperature. Either your core temperature is hotter in the morning, or your girlfriend is colder and perceives the temperature as higher.

>>8396685
Nice try OP.

>>8398149
Its totally fine to fuck.

>>8396350
Sounds like your ballsack is getting too warm in bed, make sure they don't get too warm, it's bad for your sperm.

>>8396892
She is a whore

>>8396852
This post gave me autism