redpill me on horses

Girls like horses right? But all horses are really just asshole animals that will bite you. So what does that make girls? REDPILLED

>>5198874
grils only like horses because bigg benis
they dont care if horses are stinky assholes

>>5198878
big benis and lots of SPERMMMMMMMM

Horses may seem like an expensive investment up front but buying a horse will still cost less than a human whore could ever leech out of you, horses are gentle, caring, passionate beasts who will never talk back to you

File: horse.jpg (48KB, 1200x801px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 1200x801px

I was drawing my chariot and horse! Unfortunately I passed away before finishing but the horses were already on the "other side"

can someone explain this nonsense to me?

>>5198871
Wired were the eyes of a horse on a jet pilot,
One that smiled when he flew over the bay,
Wired were the eyes of a horse on a jet pilot,
One that smiled when he flew over the bay.
Myhorseisashackledoldman
Hishisremorsewasthathecouldn'tsurvey
Theskiesrightbefore
Rightbeforetheywentgray
Myhorseandmyremorse,
Flyingoveragreatbay

In the afterlife, you are treated to a generous opportunity: you can choose whatever you would like to be in the next life. Would you like to be a member of the opposite sex? Born into royalty? A philosopher with bottomless profundity? A soldier facing triumphant battles?

But perhaps you've just returned here from a hard life. Perhaps you were tortured by the enormity of the decisions and responsibilities that surrounded you, and now there's only one thing you yearn for: simplicity. That's permissible. So for the next round, you choose to be a horse. You covet the bliss of that simple life: afternoons of grazing in grassy fields, the handsome angles of your skeleton and the prominence of your muscles, the peace of the slow-flicking tail or the steam rifling through your nostrils as you lope across snow-blanketed plains.

You announce your decision. Incantations are muttered, a wand is waved, and your body begins to metamorphose into a horse. Your muscles start to bulge; a mat of strong hair erupts to cover you like a comfortable blanket in winter. The thickening and lengthening of your neck immediately feels normal as it comes about. Your carotid arteries grow in diameter, your fingers blend hoofward, your knees stiffen, your hips strengthen, and meanwhile, as your skull lengthens into its new shape, your brain races in its changes: your cortex retreats as your cerebellum grows, the homunculus melts man to horse, neurons redirect, synapses unplug and replug on their way to equestrian patterns, and your dream of understanding what it is like to be a horse gallops toward you from the distance. Your concern about human affairs begins to slip away, your cynicism about human behavior melts, and even your human way of thinking begins to drift away from you.

>>5199451
Suddenly, for just a moment, you are aware of the problem you overlooked. The more you become a horse, the more you forget the original wish. You forget what it was like to be a human wondering what it was like to be a horse.

This moment of lucidity does not last long. But it serves as the punishment for your sins, a Promethean entrails-pecking moment, crouching half-horse half-man, with the knowledge that you cannot appreciate the destination without knowing the starting point; you cannot revel in the simplicity unless you remember the alternatives.

And that's not the worst of your revelation. You realize that the next time you return here, with your thick horse brain, you won't have the capacity to ask to become a human again. You won't understand what a human is. Your choice to slide down the intelligence ladder is irreversible. And just before you lose your final human faculties, you painfully ponder what magnificent extraterrestrial creature, enthralled with the idea of finding a simpler life, chose in the last round to become a human.

If u get a mijjet to jump under a hoarsies chin the neck will extend like a extendyy go and hell habve spots and also antennae
Also don't let um on youre barn theyl fuk ur wyfe and shell take half ur hors

DISGUSTING CREATURES... I SUGGEST THEY BE EXTERMINATED. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN NEAR ONE OF THESE THINGS? THE SMELL IS AWFUL... THEY BLOW SNOT AT YOU, LICK YOU. BUGS CONSTANTLY FLYING AROUND THEM.

>>5199510
tfw not popular enough for bugs to fly around me

>>5198871
horses have specialized buttholes with many sphincters and a specific way of pulsing these sphincters so they can have a clean, poop free rump after they unload their piles of dank stank onto the earth

these same sphincters have been duplicated in factories for the same, clean-sphincter approach to divvying out different liquids and pseudosolids

>>5199620
I want to know more about this. I'll ask Steve.

>>5199457
>>5199451
I was going to complement you on writing all of this but I googled it first. What tipped me off was that there was no mention of horse penis.

>>5199620
sounds kind of erotic

>>5200406
Well, this is just chapter 4. How do you know the rest of the book doesn't involve horse penis??