hey /s4s/ hit me up with some dank copypastas family

Uhhhh, is when uhhhhhhmpuh le name is uhhh 'Paranoiac Crrrrritical Method' because is one spontaneous method of knowledge based in the instantaneous association of delirious material. Everything appear in my life delirious, antagonistic, impossible, which together, my method, instantaneously create this miracle. It's two completely different kinds of imagination. One is the romantic imagination in your country is represent by the 1:(merilous?) painters of 2:(Raphaelite?) 3:(Bourganes?) 4:(Rosetti?), these people live in one dream but this dream is completely subjective, neurotic. Immediately, uhhhh, 5:(youse aware???) of this dream, this dream disappear, is no possible proof, that this dreams exist. In my case is absolutely of the contrary because my kind of imagination is the contrary of 6:(???), there's an inconsistency, 7:(?) one rock of piece country, is construed 8:(heavy?) material and classic is not romantic is completely classic for this is necessarily proven in one book, relationship between this classical Mediterranean landscape 9:(???) landscape of grace 10:(???) fantastic mythology in the Greek antiquity and my monstrosities, imagined monstrosities is the same kind of solid rock 11:(shed?)

File: Oldgs2.jpg (4KB, 109x111px) Image search: [Google]

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>>4678065
Giant Spider.

There was a castle. No. It wasn’t necessarily a castle, it could be anything: a factory, a bank, a gambling house. So the guard could be either a watchman or a bodyguard. Now the guard, always prepared for the enemy attack, never failed in his vigilance. One day the long-expected enemy finally came. This was the moment, and he rang the alarm signal. Strangely enough, however, there was no response from the troops. Needless to say, the enemy easily overpowered the guard in one fell swoop. In his fading consciousness he saw the enemy sweeping like the wind through the gates, over the walls, and into the buildings unhindered by anyone. No, it was the castle, not the enemy, that was really like the wind. The single guard, like a withered tree in the wilderness, had stood guarding an illusion

I've got some fine exhibits for you. First, post 1 of 2 of an /x/phile's story.
_________________________________
I'm starting to think that something may be wrong.

As I discover more instances of the Godhead S in my daily life, my ability to focus declines. I am constantly distracted, drawn to my bathroom. The mental magnet coincides with a mold, which grows in patterns contrecoup to the sigils I picture during my showers.

How do you resist paranormal distraction attempts?

------

I hope for the best for you

I have tried many things to kill the mold, from medical (bleach), to spiritual (black thoughts) to natural (semen). I know that killing it should be enough, but nothing it working.

------

I have been tracking appearances of the Godhead S around my town for several months. In April, when I found one of them on the terminal for a local transport system, there was a relatively light rain storm and then a piercing beam of light and cloud, a pillar, above what I believe to be local science facility Pillar Tech. There are difficulties with my internal sense of direction which have made it difficult for me to locate and confirm on a map.

Since this day I have been plagued with a progressively worsening series of psuedo-OCD symptoms compelling me to repeatedly check the state of the shower in my bathroom. A black, filament-thin mold has been growing on the wall of my shower since around that time and I believe it to be the cause of my lack of focus. It can not be killed by any method known to myself or my landlord.

>>4678236

Part 2 of 2. Fun fact: a similar story was reported on Midnight in the Desert, a late-night conspiracy radio show.

___________________________________
Much of my findings come from blogs that have died over the years before storage space was an affordable commodity so I must start by saying I am sorry that there are few sources for my digital information.

Oldest copy I have documented: While volunteering at the school of my youth, I was responsible for ripping apart library books that had been unused for decades and were already accounted for at the other local libraries. As such, I had to deal with books that had been in storage since the 1930s. In that storage closet, in a book that had not been checked out since 1928 (Don Quixote), I found the Godhead S drawn across the copyright information.

I have read credible reports on forums of use of the Godhead S is countries with alternative alphabets. The only major alphabet of which I have not seen a claimant is the Arabic fonts, though I have no reason to believe that they are not also possessed of the knowledge. For reasons that I can not begin to understand, the most common non-English region to report the S is the Ukraine.

Of my imported book searches I have found it showing up strongly in Chinese textbooks of the 80s. This may be do to the sampling of bad luck and difficulty of finding foreign text books, but it is an interesting note regardless. It is from these texts that the genie theory rose, due to the many occurance of the 八仙 around the S sightings. It is beyond my sad Chinese to attempt any serious investigation into the connection, though many of my discussionists favor this theory.

I am most personally fond of the interpretation of the S as a horizontal image made vertical; that is, it is an infinity. Unending loops are a more universal symbol that an art of a Roman letter, which matches the global nature of the S.

>>4678065
…………………,,-‘´ … _,,,,,’;:-,……………….
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………………/ … …¯,_ ~–~’,, …’.………
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……………..| … … . , … .`’-, … |……….
……………./\ … … .“-,,,-’~-~’ … ’|……….
………….,/’`\,`’-, … … … … . . /.………
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Now, we'll dip into some of the results of 2015's Copypasta Advancement Week.

_____________________________

you are a child and you and everything you believe are the cancer.
this is 4chan, and once upon a time that meant something. it meant we checked our egos at the door in the spirit of having fun and not taking ourselves seriously. that was when adults controlled this place, but those times will never come back. there will never be enough good people left to stand up against your childish high-school level sectarianism, your empty buzzwords and your entitled little fevered ego. but i'll still be here to remind you, you are the cancer.
you are not special, you are not exceptional, and your ego is not worth one fucking red cent. grow up and get over yourself, please, and quickly.

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lol you faggot, we get it, you want to sound intelligent and important and so you go to a forum like this and find some other jizzbag like you who just writes the same shit over and over again to have a debate so that someone can finally listen and hear your point of view because everybody who comes across you isn't interested. You're not smart, you're not interesting, you're an unemployed dullard who uses 4chan to get the attention he doesnt get at home.

Everything is a meme. Look around. See that chair? That's a meme. Those curtains? Meme. The floor? The air around you? The sound of a laughing giraffe? The concept of time? All of these things, and many more, are memes. Literally everything. Like, whatever you can think of, that's a meme. Memes are everywhere. You're a meme, you're face is a meme, you're mum is a meme. Amazingly, even the word "meme" is a meme. You can walk out of your house and find memes all over. In the trash, even. Some people just throw memes away. Go find some. Find some trash-memes. Eat them and you shall grow as a strong as a herd of wildebeest. Eat the memes, be the memes. Don't live in regret, do it now.

I'll post a favorite OC copypasta of mine that I've used countless times on /tv/. It is 100% effective in enraging people of all kinds every time: 1. It enrages the newfigs because they disagree with me and/or truly think I am literally crying 2. It enrages the oldfigs because they disagree with me and, as such, hate me and they hate that my thread gets replies from the newfigs and there's nothing they can do about it and 3. It enrages the mods/janitors because they don't know whether I'm being sincere in my attempt to evoke honest discussion with my OP (I always am) and therefor don't know whether to ban me. I literally had an "anonymous poster" (clearly a janitor/mod) straight out ask me "what the point was in these threads" and I ironically replied (as a tripfag) "to get attention." Mysteriously, my thread was deleted and I was banned no more than 60 seconds from submitting my response.

Without further ado:

Guys, I'm literally crying right now.

I just found out my Dad thinks the best actor of our generation is quote unquote "Daniel Day Lewis."

I also got him to cosign the idea of "I hate fun" in conjunction with this admission.

He also called Leo DiCaprio a "pretty boy" who embraces "American silliness."

Fuck guys, what the fuck am I going to do? My dad is like the rest of you fake, pretentious "patricians" who haven't had an original thought in your life.

That's right: a NAIA National Wrestling Champion, and two-time NJCAA All-American in amateur wrestling. I was undefeated in college with a record of 85-0. Not only that but I hold a black belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, and Sambo. I currently compete in mixed martial arts, and will most likely be competing in the big leagues (UFC) if I maintain my success.

They're already calling me the next Brock Lesnar.

With my 6'4 and 280 lbs frame, not to mention my sheer brute force and amazing agility normally associated with men half my size, I have no doubt in my mind that if any of you pencil-necked faggots faced me one-on-one, you would be on the ground before you fucking knew it.

my name eric and all the ladies love my unreasonable large membership. fatter girl, thin grl, girls large forehead girls pretty faces, girls smelled of cabage, back problems girl i have back problems too my sausage so big please advice?

At the end of last month I lost my job. I got a decent retirement package out of it that will keep me going for a year or two depending on how frugal I am, so I'm trying to be very frugal indeed. Stuff like wearing a sweater instead of putting the heating on, squeezing the toothpaste from the bottom of the tube, and getting the most out of the yearly travelcard I had for my job that expires on 31st December. To this end I've been getting the same train to my old workplace every day, and just not getting off. Instead I just ride to the last stop, and then back again, 10-12 hours a day.

This is not as dumb as it sounds; the carriages are very comfortable, the seats are big and have plenty of legroom. I've saved a shitload on heating already this winter, not to mention stuff like water, broadband and electricity costs. All I did at home was shitpost on 4chan, and I can do that on the train as all carriages have wi-fi.

Sometimes I have to duck into a bathroom or something if the conductors are lurking around. My travelcard is good for any time so I doubt they could kick me off, but it would still look weird and I don't want to get into a conversation about why I'm riding the train all day. Mostly, I don't want them to talk to me when the train is quiet, around 11:00-13:00, in case it becomes a daily event. The staff are really nice, I'm just an anti-social bastard. Often I'm literally the only guy in the carriage at this time of day, so I've started ducking into the bathroom and staying there until the 'lunch time rush' (Incidentally, the bathrooms are large and clean and private, I'm not too proud to admit I've 'put my laptop to use' in there a few times). I normally take a few sandwiches with me and eat those throughout the day; on Fridays I treat myself to a panini from the refreshment cart, and take 8 beers with me (you can drink freely). So far, it's mostly working out alright.

>>4678261
There's been a couple of close calls. The train company provide 'fun-packs' for kids, with crayons and little toys and stuff, and these often contain a couple of hard candies. As the the bags are open when they hand them out it's easy to just grab the candies from the bags when they are on the cart, which I do when nobody is around. One time I 'harvested' maybe 6-7 'nests' (I don't know when or why I started calling them this) and turned around to see an angry and confused attendant scowling at me. She ordered me to put the candies back so I had to sheepishly empty my pockets, then she yelled at me for putting them straight in the bags as I could have poisoned them and now the poison could be on the toys. I was scared shitless there was going to be police waiting to put me on the register when we reached the next station, but nothing happened. Now she says 'good morning' to me so I guess we're straight (I still harvest the odd nest when she isn't around though).

The other time was worse. I was sitting at a table reading a newspaper, and I heard some shuffling about. I lowered the paper and there was a grinning bald man's face maybe 2 inches from where I held the paper. We didn't speak for a couple of seconds, and then he said 'I know you. I saw you on here last week too.' I said 'What?' and he stood up and walked off grinning at me. I watched him go back to his seat, then in a couple of minutes we were at the next stop and I watched him get off over the top of the newspaper. I was thinking about how fucking weird that was when I heard a tap at the window. I looked out knowing it was him, but somehow he had walked off with my coffee when we were talking and he was holding it up mocking me. I stood up and said 'Motherfucker' involuntarily, then the train departed as he was pretending to drink the coffee in an exaggerated manner and rubbing his belly in delight. I haven't seen him since, but I was worried he was going to rat me out.

MOTHERFUCKING SHIT. I WAS JUST MASTURBATING AND EVERYTHING WAS GOING GREAT. I WAS IN MY ROOM, I HAD MY HEADPHONES ON, I WAS TOTALLY NAKED SITTING AT MY COMPUTER FAPPING AWAY TO A VIDEO ON REDTUBE. ALL OF A SUDDEN THERE'S THIS REALLY SHARP PAIN IN MY DICK, LIKE IT JUST GOT STABBED WITH A SEWING NEEDLE. I JERKED MY HAND BACK AND IT BUMPED INTO MY COMPUTER TOWER, WHICH SITS ON THE DESK. WELL, I HAD MY STICK OF DEODORANT ON TOP OF THE TOWER, AND THAT BITCH FELL OFF AND LANDED DEODORANT-END-DOWN ON THE HEAD OF MY COCK. HOLY FUCKING SHIT DID THAT HURT, AND ON TOP OF THAT IT HIT SO HARD THAT IT ACTUALLY FORCED SOME DEODORANT INTO MY URETHRA. I'VE NEVER HAD ANYTHING BURN SO BAD IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. I JUMPED OUT OF MY FUCKING CHAIR AND STOOD UP BECAUSE IT HURT SO BAD; THIS CAUSED MY HEADPHONE CABLE TO GET YANKED OUT OF MY SPEAKERS, WHICH CAUSED "OH YEAH BABY COME DEEP IN MY TIGHT TEEN ASSHOLE UH UH UH" TO GET BLARED THROUGH MY FUCKING HOUSE AND ALMOST MAXIMUM VOLUME. NOW MY EYES ARE WATERING FROM THE PAIN OF THE DEODORANT INSIDE MY COCK BUT I MANAGE TO PUNCH ONE OF MY SPEAKERS HARD ENOUGH SO THEY TURN OFF. I LOOKED DOWN AND NOTICED BLOOD DRIPPING OFF OF MY COCK; I GUESS THE LIP OF THE PLASTIC DEODORANT THING BIT INTO MY FORESKIN AS IT CONNECTED WITH MY COCK. THE BLOOD WAS DRIPPING DOWN MY LEG.

As a woman, when I hear the slogan asking if I am ready for Hillary, I become nervous and my anus clenches because I interpret those words as a warning that Hillary is about to forcefully mount me from behind for a political rape. Hillary is very much a part of the Patriarchy. That is why I urge the women who hear my message to write in Martha Stewart instead of voting for Hillary. Thank you so much.

Send this copypasta to 5 friends
or your boyfriend will meet another girl next week.

Actually, if you paid closer attention, you'd find I've been spearheading independent, grassroots, innovative, completely organic, highly activated, non-copypasta copypasta. It's a kind of meta-copypasta that isn't copy and pasted. This new kind of copypasta is essentially the Jungian archetypes of the previous copypasta boiled and distilled into their purest forms and then applied alongside highly potent original content. It's new. It's fresh. It's dank.

You, I'm afraid to say, are stuck in the copypasta copypast. Memes have developed and evolved, hypostasized and transcended. Copypasta needs to do the same. You can't do that, however, by a project to perpetuate past glory. You need a new approach. It's the new approach that I have taken. It's not caught on, I admit, but that's mainly because people don't really "get it". If we give them time, though, they'll catch on -- I'm sure of it.

OP are you not aware of how offensive this picture is to me and my children? Were sitting at home enjoying a nice sesame cake when I was showing them my favorite board: [s4s]. I Was showing them how to check dubs and letting them post in the kek thread. Oh, they were having such fun. Once they had posted kek for the fifteenth time, I took them back to the front page, and enthusiastically pressed F5, hoping for more funposting opportunities.

Much to my chagrin, I was presented with this photograph of a naked woman. I covered my children's eyes with all of my hands and shrieked in terror. I pushed them out of the room as quickly as I could while closing my web browser.

I lead my children to my room and told them to not think about the horrible things they have witnessed. Thanks to your thread, my children will grow up and become degenerates, probably smoking marijuana and prostituting themselves instead of going to Seminary school like good children should.

As soon as I put my children to bed, I came back and wrote your webmaster a strongly-worded letter. It was very well-written and contained a great deal of adverbs and semi-colons, so I believe he will see my point.

When he does see my point, he will see fit to put a permanent ban onto your internet address. You will no longer be able to post your filthy, disgusting pictures on this site for good Christian families any longer.

I hope it was worth it, and I hope that you think about your life and what sort of impact you're having on the world in general.

Good day to you,

Sincerely,

A disgruntled parent

And, here's the last of my contributions. I hope you found the dank that will make you thank.

_______________________________
What people need to realize is that memes are much more important than they seem. Of all boards this one should know that more than anyone. Memes are the DNA of the soul, and as such using them correctly will better yourself and those around you. Inversely using bad memes will taint your soul and cause every other poster to suffer. Posting anime without moderation will lead to the board having an aura of filth and elitism, like that of a neckbeard weeaboo. Even worse is the posting of these "Pepes", rare or not. They contain the plague that is the very essence of /r9k/, and pave the way for an unfathomable amount of rudeposting. By allowing these frogs, we allow the very opposite of what we stand for to come post with us.
Together we can combat the influx of bad memes, and bad attitudes.

>>4678065
I love that Olympic volleyball I have no clue who has one what game yet but I've watched a lot of it

>>4678284
Holy fuck OP here, thank you General L.E. Ankh my sides are in the fucking universe, those are good keks.