The catastrophe that is my life

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>be me
>at work
>shifts almost over
>look out office window
>pretty lady walking out side.
>perfect 8.5
>goodenough.jpeg
>it's raining
>mfw it's kinda cold
>run outside
>give her jacket.
>mfw she smiles
>give her ride home
>stop at her house
>mfw she tells me to come inside
>gettinglaidtonite.mp4
>go inside
>she gives me a drink
>invites me up to her room
>she sits in bed
>takes clothes off
>mfw she lures me over
>definitelygettinglaid.mov
>reach in my bag
>pulls out gameboy
>mfw she has a gameboy too
>trading pokemon
>she gives me a snorlax.
>bitch.jpeg
>crawl in her bed
>she asks if I have protection
>nope.mp4
>she tells me to look in her closet
>open closet
>there's Furbys.
>like at least twelve.
>They're all on
>ohmygodhelp.mov
>evil eyes
>oh my god one called me by name
>mfw the Furbys gain sentience
>they're evil
>fuck.
>they jump down
>getting kidnapped by Furbys
>as I'm pulled out of the room girl looks at me
>mfw she's laughing maniacally.
>Furbys drag me to dungeon
>getting brainwashed
>I now sexually identify as a Furby
>I can feel the Furbys up against my skin
>I fuck all of the Furbys in the room
>Go back upstairs
>tell girl she's not my type.
>Steal her pokemon cards
>leave her house
>drive home
>walk into my bedroom
>mfw there's Furbys everyewhere
>panic.jpg
>pull out Nerf N-Strike Elite dart blaster
>mfw I shoot them ALL.
>leave house
>order happy meal at McD's
>Furby toy.
>shit.