>be me at first job at retail
>work at retail electronic store in Manhattan Beach area
>work in expensive merch cage where I witness the horror my comrades go through behind the registers
>occasionally get on the floor (and yes, walk the dinosaur, if that translates to butting heads with my super)
>organizing MOBO aisle
>felt an immense energy upon me as if it was a gravitational pull
>turn around and was slapped with the stench of body odor and last night's what I assume Mac'an'Cheese
>it was a land whale, pale as vanilla yogurt, with the occasional cottage cheese curdled face and strawberry bit zits
>breathing heavily and felt like he was gonna speak in wales and groans
"..."
"..."
"ecxcuthe me sir..."
>"uh, yeah. May I help ya sir?" "do you know how to build?" [cynically]
>"Um, computers, right?"
>He agrees and and proceeds to ask my opinions on builds then tries to one up me and corrects me on my "mistakes"
>keep in mind, I'm recently new to PC building, but absorbed enough know-how of what and what not to do
>10 mins pass and he is still lecturing me on on the basics of PC building and which games he thinks are superior
>occasionally gets off track and talks about Japanese media and American
>This man-child is literally the poster child of autism awareness
>Im talking bout the cargo pants, shitty worn and torn jacket over Chinese cartoon shirt, and yes... he had "that" headgear
>this fucker tries to one-up me in EVERYTHING
>i'm really resisting the urge to grab one of the MOBOs and shoving it up his ass and through his throat
>Seller steps in "Yo man, I'm salesman Bob. Can I help you?"
>He was a bro, and saw me in pain. Good thing I summoned him, cause this fucker was gonna pay cold hard allowance money on his overkill shit comp, and Bob gets paid on commission
Will continue...
Continued
>get sent back to the safety of the cage
>fuck around and jerk off for 30mins
>talk to qt cashier, a solid 7.8 in my book
>drives me mad with dick fever when she dyes her hair crimson
>then the unthinkable happens
>its as if Jesus,Satan, Gaben, Buddha, Neil DeGrasse, S. Hawking, and Raptor Jesus sensed my boredom, and said, "Fuck it! Give this poor bastard a goodshow!"
>I could hear the heavy breathing and pungent aroma from the vile beast
>qt maintains chit chat with the thing
>his build comes to $3000 and plus because Amiibos
"aww, I like Pikachu. So cute"
"[Grumbles] Ugh, yeh. I collect things that are valuable. But if I had to collect something most valuable..."
>Oh god... Is he gonna say what I think he'll say?
"Id collect you..."
>My brain couldn't take that much info happening at once
>Choke on my snot and spit because reasons
"[nervous laughter] uhh, thanks?"
>the think smirked and tipped
>not tipped as in handed her loose change
>leaves the store as if it thought he had a chance with such a marvelous creature i work with
>qt looks at me confused and tries hard not suffocate
"are breathing hard b/c of the smell or what he just said?"
"both"
And that was the day I realized the type of customers I'm going to deal with as a salesman. Also, had a guy that looked like Chef Guy Fieri came into my store. Have his pic.
>>3978022
>22
nice doble
didn't read
did you at least see the chef?
okay i read it
dude who are you quoting?
>>3978018
The fuck is a MOBO?
>be me
>grab gun
>shoot self
>>3978018
who are you quoting?
>>3978018
>>3978022 (dubs nice)
>>3978387
Who are you quoting dumb greenposter?
that is too much text to read but i just want to say that even tho i dont know who you are and never will meet u i still hope you hav a good dae C:
>>3978392
>not checking my fore
i'm quoting shakespeare btw.
>>3978399
>99
Great job!