PAINFUL SEX EXPERIENCES

>Be at party
>Be talking with my best friend (he's orbiting a really cute girl)
>I accidentally spill my drink on her, and I apologize, and she tells me to get some wipes
>I grab her some wipes, and she's standing behind me at the bathroom waiting for me to get the shit off her.
>The orbiter friend is outside of the bathroom, and the door accidentally gets shut; the look on his face is priceless.
>I help her clean her shirt.
>We stare into eachother's eyes and start making out randomly.
>I lock the door and we begin to fuck
>I start doggy-styling her for a good 15 minutes, and it slips out, so I put it back in
>Accidentally start fucking her ass.
>Felt good
>Came on her
>Blood, shit and semen got on her skirt.
>She walked around the entire rest of the night until her orbiter told her about the poo poo running down her leg.

The most painful about my sex experienced is the number: 0

Sex with my (now ex)girlfriend never lost its awkwardness. Trying to put it in while wearing a condom was like trying to feel a coin through a mattress while wearing thick gloves. The thought of not being able to put it in made me lose my erection which would also make it harder to properly put benis in bagina. Cowgirl was the only position we could do.

But if we're talking painful I guess the most memorable would be the time I came inside her and pulled out only to find out that the condom had slipped off during sex. She wasn't on birth control. To go from a feeling of euphoria to a feeling of "oh shit what have I done?" so sudden and fast is like getting punched in the gut. Felt like a fucking idiot for not noticing the condom, but then again I wasn't exactly a master of sex (due to previously mentioned insertion problem). The worst part is that you have to keep on a brave face to make her feel better. Luckily it was in the morning so we immediately went out to buy a morning after pill, but I don't think I've ever felt so scared before in my life.

Spent pretty much the entire weekend looking up info about menstrual cycles, ovulating and birth control effectiveness when she wasn't looking. She went on vacation with her parents the next weekend so I didn't get to see her again until two weeks later. We were getting intimate, she pushed my hands away from her private parts and said she was on her period. First time I was happy to hear her say that.

fucking a girl in the woods
some deer come
start watching
deer bonks me over the head with a club

>>39610613
Did you encounter a skinwalker or something?

>>39610712
is a skinwalker one of the lost bois? if so then yes, yes I totally did

>be me
>being born
>get bonked over the head by the doctor on the way out

If you've had any sexual experience please kys or leave this board. You're a fucking normie.

>>39611223
*bonk* ur pseudo-confidence/superiority isn't currency, you fake ass little bitch of a nigger (regardless of ur color)

>>39611223
the closest you've gotten to a sexual experience is the ecstacy u feel when u reee at some1 greentexting about what the inside of Stacy's asshole feels like with his dick

>>39611731
fuck off faggot I only go for 2D womyn

>>39611765
do u have to jack off spinning in a circle? go fuck a pile of sand.

>>39609200
>>friend is doing film project on J.T.R.
Joint Travel Regulations?

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I knew i guy that had to go to a&e because he broke.hos dick when some chick was riding it and it slipped out without them realizing and she went back down on it and bent it with all her weight. Like literally broke it he said.

>>39609200
>hire escort because horny 18 year old
>start the fuggening
>she literally says "ow" under her breath multiple times and I have to go slower
>apparently my benis is thick
>condom was on way too tight and none of them properly fit so I just get a bj and she offered to reduce the price by half which I accepted
She sucked like a vacuum and was clean, and redpilled me on girth. I didn't even think I was that big.

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>>39609200
I got you

>be me
>19 years old
>first year of college
>end up meeting this fat mexican chick in one of my classes
>get along well, end up going to the movies one night
>afterwards, head back to house
>end up cuddling on the bed
>we start to making out
>fuckyeah.png
>shit is getting hot
>looks me in the eye and tells me she wants to try something
>O-o-ok
>She starts sucking me off
>Feels real fucking good
>Magical Fucking Tongue
>Start to get into a rythm
>And then, it happens
>The feeling of a thousand wasps all biting at the inside of my dick happens
>look down
>The dumb bitch is fucking picking at the hole of my cock and isn't fucking stopping
>push her off
>ask her what the fuck she was thinking
>"Oh it was just something I had seen online and I wanted to try it out"
>Ended up cuddling for the rest of the night but was to afraid to let her anywhere near my crotch
>Haven't talked to her since
>mfw I think about that moment

>sleepover at a guy's house
>have foreplay fun, uses lube to stick his finger in my ass
>suck him, the whole shabang
>knows I'm a virgin but tries to stick his dick in anyway
>barely even touches the entrance, it fucking burns
>worst pain ever
>he now tries to finger me
>not even an inch can get in
>just stick to pleasuring him with my mouth for the night

No more attempting coitus. Ever.