Things that keep you from killing yourself

honestly i dont know what the deal is, the thought of not existing seems awesome but i couldnt ever do it i dont think and this bothers me since even a girl or two in highschool hung themselves. i wouldnt wanna hang myself or anything like cut yourself. i think id use a gun but at the same time i feel like thats cheating since a hundred years ago you wouldnt have a gun.

so id like to fall over dead when im all alone on a fall day but even if i had cancer i think id be too nervous to blow my brain out. is that being a pussy? if i got cancer how could i just do it and not give a shit?

>my cat
>my next gun purchase
>my anime backlog
>will to live still marginally bigger than will to not live

>fear
>uncertainty
>mom

1. i want to see WW3 in person
2. i want to see capitalism fall
3. i want to fuck a hologram
4. i want to fuck a robot where it is impossible to tell its a robot
5. i want to ride a flying car
6. if i live long enough get 10 face from crazy medical technology

At this point its only books and music that keep me from killing myself. Vidya just don't have the same appeal to me anymore.

>>39523354
The fear of Oblivion. The fact that there is nothing after death scars the shit out of me. Just not existing anymore frightens me more than anything in the world.

Also food and drugs i guess.

1. my parents would be sad

that's about it

get off this board dmn

>my brother
>4chan
>normie games

Can't think of a good way that's:
>easy
>no chance of surviving with permanent debilitation/criminal record
I tried suffocating in a bag once but instinct took over and I ended up ripping it off. No access to guns unfortunately, and no high drops nearby that I know of. It's not really a pressing issue for me 'cuz my situation's pretty cushy, but I have a feeling it is going to be how I go out.

>>39523550
Exactly this.My mom would be absolutely torn and I don't think i could do that to her

>>39523354
Nothing
The only thing holding me back is that I don't know how to, nor do I have the materials necessary

>>39523354
>cat
>family

i cant think of a third thing

>>39523431
Am I a pussy, anyone?

>>39523354
>my 4TB porn collection
>my cat

>>39523550
This
When they die I would be free to do it

>>39523875
I wouldn't say that's being pussy. Many methods of suicide can fail especially by gun if you don't do it right.

>>39523354
>Mom

It would devastate her. Brother is a homeless junkie. She divorced my dad a year ago, who is a narcissistic manipulative cunt. And she's covered for 80% in burn scars. Me making something of myself is the only thing she has hope for atm. Even thou she knows I'm bipolar and suicidally deoressed atm. I think she blinds herself from the truth.

>my cats
>vidya
>movies and series
>music
>family

can we get your soundcloud profile? I want to listen to your music

>>39523354
4chan
Wizardchan
Not much else if I'm brutally honest

>>39524009
Really???? Mom and dad??

>>39523957
thank you

i just dont see how someone could be cool with hanging themselves and a girl in highschool had her stomach pumped using pills and i think what does she have that makes her have more balls than me. basically i just wanna be able to do it when im old one day and maybe have cancer alone in some woods but i still feel like evn if i was in pain id be too nervous to kms. i dont get it

>>39523550
>parents already ashamed of me and have always treated me like the black sheep of the family

I don't love them enough to not kill myself but the only thing keeping me from doing it is me being such a fucking coward. I have everything I need to do it I just I don't know.

what kind of pussy kills themselves?

If you were alone in a forest would a shotgun to the roof of the mouth even if i didnt kill instantly would you be mentally aware enough to feel it? how long would it take to bleed out if it failed and would it probably fail?

A lot of robots have cats

>>39523354
>Weed, sometimes

as opposed to the times it hasn't stopped you from killing yourself?

1. vidya(mostly WoW)
2. and still 18 so there might be hope (highly doubt it tho)

>my fear
That's it.

>my cat
>my art
>vidya
>anime

>>39523354
Anon post your soundcloud pls

>>39524261
maybe some other time, it's just acoustic guitar and various sounds around my house

>>39523354
1. my news helicopter
2. my helicopter pad for my news helicopter

File: 2f7.jpg (28KB, 601x508px) Image search: [Google]

28KB, 601x508px

>>39523354
https://efukt.com/21347_Flashing_Kids_At_The_Mall_Prank.html

This video. Makes me give way less fucks about women for some reason. I just want to channel phonebro's stoicism and lack of fucks about hoes.

File: 1345555862899.jpg (43KB, 465x661px)

43KB, 465x661px

>her
>inba gtfo normie

bc of her, i can imagine a future worth living for, a future where i am happy which made enduring all this bullshit actually worth it.

in reality, i will never be with her (i may be dellusional but not to that degree), but since there is a minimal chance it could eventually happen, i wouldnt dare to miss this chance....

A chance something will happen.
Atm every day is just bleeding into the next. Wasting each minute as it passes. But atleast there is time to waste. Death is so final, I dont off myself because I like to hold out hope that shit will get better.

>vidya
>porn
>anime

>>39524324
I wanna hear it pls plss

File: 1503771560213.jpg (137KB, 533x889px)

137KB, 533x889px

>>39523354
1. Hope to escape the despair
2. If I cannot achieve #1, then hope to cause despair in those who are hopeful

File: 1504506661573.png (5KB, 546x459px)

5KB, 546x459px

>Good beer
>Good food
>My houseplants
I'm a man of simple tastes

>>39523354
>my cat
>weed
>food

Once the cat dies I'm out of here.

File: 1.jpg (7KB, 200x169px)

7KB, 200x169px

>v-video game achievements
>anime
>interest in future events

>>39523354
I got 68 subscribers..heh
But to answer your question I haven't given up just yet but if I come back to college next year and still manage to fuck it up, then I might seriously consider going full degenerate or possibly kms

>>39523354
Honestly nothing
Suicide is becoming more and more viable

File: maxresdefault.jpg (57KB, 1280x720px)

57KB, 1280x720px

>>39523354
>Fuck tons of ego
>Lazyness
>Stuff I'm addicted to