suicide attempt stories

>>39421224
Does anyone dies of Pills overdose? Every time i read suicide attempts with pills they fucking survive

>>39421258
Yeah, it was a bad choice. But it was right there, and I took three full bottles. It should have completely killed me, but because of some fucking joke, it didn't.

>>39421347
What did you take?

I've never really had an actual suicide attempt, closest I got was tying a noose around my neck with a bedsheet.

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>bought gun to kill myself
>keep putting it off, trying to get better
>get into huge drunken fist fight with my older brother at my apartment
>he started the fight, put his hands on me first, and threw the first punch while my back was turned
>I get knocked unconscious, how to kill myself when I wake up
>call my Dad, tell him I love him
>lay down on my bed, crying uncontrollably, put gun up to my left temple, pull trigger
>nothing happens, didn't have the bullet in the chamber
>time to try again
>cock the gun, see the bullet in the chamber, it's time to die
>put gun up my left temple again, pull the trigger
>loudest noise of my entire life, bright white flash
>last thing I remember was the sound of the casing bouncing around the room

>wake up the next day alone, with my head covered in blood
>my hand wasn't steady enough, and I only grazed my scalp and left a long wound on the left side of my head
>see the bullet hole in my bedroom wall and stare at it for 3 hours straight

Sometimes I wonder if I didn't slip into a different timeline where I survived, and myself from that timeline actually died. There's just no way I missed.

it's crazy that no one called the cops after the gun went off. My neighbors definitely heard it.. I haven't had health insurance in years, so I didn't go to the ER.. Just wrapped a towel around my head and spend the next couple days nursing a mighty concussion

Saw my Dad a few days later and we had lunch. Told him I was finished with everything, thanked him for everything he's given me, but I was leaving my home.

I left my apartment and job and became homeless for the next 7 months. Spent over 2 of those months living on the beaches that just got owned by hurricane harvey

Not homeless any more, but I still struggle with depression/suicidal thoughts/alcoholism and every time I land a decent job I usually quit within 60 days and the cycle starts again.

>>39421564
Holy fuck anon. How do you feel the day after? Do you regret about that attempt? Was seriously shit anon.

>>39421602
Felt like I had been kicked in the head by a horse. I swear my IQ was chopped in half that day. Emotionally I was in shock and completely numb for about a month

I'm conflicted.. On one hand I regret even contemplating suicide because I know how much it would upset my Dad.. But on the other hand I wish I had died, so the people in my life could get away from the constant burdens I create and pass on to the people around me. I'm like a virus

>>39421677
Shit. I knoe how you feel. Every single person who tried to love me and show me affect gets really hurted by me. I'm a virus too.

>>39421677
Christ, hi me. I literally only do things in life and advance my career because for me its that or suicide so im not a burden, and suicide seems much better every now and then compared to this.

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Yeah, it's been almost 4 years now.
>get fired from a big job for perfectionism
>land a new job right away
> perfectionism sets in and I miss my first deadline
>don't even remember attempting
>wake up with black blood on my bedsheets and a bunch of angry emails asking where my work is
>roommate doesn't even notice that I've been passed out for a couple days
>never felt so sick, can barely drink water
>get fired again

It was a pretty eye opening experience. No one noticed or cared it seemed. It made me realize my death would be meaningless and forgotten. I saw a free councilor for a few months afterwards and she gave me some advice on getting over my perfectionism. It was still difficult to find a reason to live for the next year and it felt like it was impossible to experience pleasure. Life is better now but also my expectations are lower.

>>39421744
>>39421709

When I hit rock bottom all I can think about is cutting my losses.. But then I land a new job and that makes me suddenly energizes me enough to make it through a few more weeks because it makes me feel like I won't be a burden anymore.. But I always quit my jobs after I realize what I hate about the job

Not having access to medical help due to ridiculous costs and lack of places that will help a young white male makes it all seem hopeless. At the end of the day I believe offing myself is inevitable

...but I really do fear I will just slip into another timeline of never ending suffering if I try it again. I swear, there's no way I missed. I should be dead

>>39421815
>It was a pretty eye opening experience. No one noticed or cared it seemed. It made me realize my death would be meaningless and forgotten

That is exactly how I felt after I tried to shoot myself in the head. I woke up alone, with no missed calls, and spent the next 3 days all alone. No one gave a shit it seemed (besides my Dad)

Not really a suicide attempt. Closest I ever got was driving 40 miles out to the bridge I planned to jump off of. Ended up just parking my car in a parking lot a couple miles away and sitting there for an hour before driving home. I immediately regretted not going through with it once I got home.

Since then I've become more miserable. With school having started, I can't take it anymore. I'm just killing time until sunrise and then I'm going back to do it right.

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>>39421966
Yeah, it sort of demystified suicide for me. I guess I always imagined that people might feel guilty for how they treated me but it turns out people don't notice.
It sounds like you're still in a tough spot, I escaped mine after 2 years. Not that life has not been shitty from time to time but I feel like I understand that I am addicted to suffering and causing obstacles in my life. So now I allow myself to drift and not care from time to time.
I hope you find peace OP

>>39421931

Readup on quantum immortality, dying just transfers you to the nearest parallel universe where you survived. No one ever experiences their own death

>>39421224
If you live in America and you don't kill yourself with a gun you are fucking up

Hanging is a viable alternative for euros

Don't overdose on pills, that's some teenage shit