/britfeel/

got two of those new dairy milk oreo thingies, one peanut butter and the other mint

eating the peanut butter one and it's a bit weird desu but actually surprisingly moreish

>>39296498
Your cat is well posh. My cat will only eat cat food and animal flesh.

As Salaam Alaikum oh my brothers, take joy in this thread that Allah has provided for you and strive to do his will this day.

In'Sha Allah.

>>39296498
Pakis out!
Aussies in!

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4JkIs37a2JE

Some based anon has shared this one before apparently

NEET for a brief period, how do people do this for years on end?

>>39296498
cheeky fucker
hope you gave him what for

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>>39296560
I just want you to know I really enjoy these posts and read them out loud in my paki voice

>>39296583
The alternative is being miserable for 50 hours a week

>>39296583

NEET is no problem at all. The problem is NEETI for Not in Employment Education or Training and Insolvent. As long as you have access to cash NEET is a rather spiffy way to live.

>>39296603
Jokes on you, I'm only miserable for 35 hours a week

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>Tfw no /britfeel/ bf

How do I deal with this feel

>>39296617
Getting to and from work is also miserable

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>>39296573

Conduct TV interviews

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bro4mkb_VKc

>>39296594

As Allah wills oh my brother.
In his many names.

>>39296609
Oh yeah I guess, but when we talk about NEETs we're usually talking about NEETI was it not for parental help/mental illness.

>>39296620
Get one

pick me

>>39296622
>tfw 40 minute commute
Okay, so more like 40 miserable hours then

>>39296642
Both ways?

Then there's also being exhausted because of work, having to wake up early, winter mornings etc

Dunno how people do it

>>39296620
>tfw was a fat pepe
>now a lanky wojak

>>39296655

Sometimes I think jail would be preferable, but then I think holidays & good food and what not. Still don't know how people manage it just the same.

deposited that cheque
ka-ching, that's a takeaway next week

>>39296725
but you get raped and beaten up in jail

>tfw going back to uni in a week
>tfw living in a tiny studio apartment with no human interaction for a year

also

>tfw rich piana is dead

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Britfeel is astoundingly slow today

>>39296875

Nah, not really. You just need to be able to adapt to the environment.

That could be a problem for some molluscs right enough.

>>39296912
It's afternoon. NEETs are still asleep.

>>39296910
Better than living with a bunch of people who can't even keep their own rooms clean, let alone an entire house. I'd have loved to live somewhere that I knew when I came home, it wasn't going to be far worse than when I left.

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convince me not to do this

>>39297028
>Those pizza choices
>Classic crust
>No wings
Absolutely shit taste senpai

>>39297028
it's dominoes so will taste like pish

get a good indian instead for a fraction of the price

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>the topic on Loose Women today is whether it's wrong to have a bath with your teenaged children

>>39297042
I'm uh.. not you
nobody is
except you

>>39297028
Tell me how the choco pizza is senpai

>>39297062
I'm not falling for that m8. Why the hell am I ordering shit I don't like? I should be getting a BBQ crust veg supreme with ham and cumberland sausage. With some bbq wings to start. Speaking of which, I'm supposed to be on a diet so pack it in. Not worth losing all my progress.

>>39297051
I love loose women

https://youtu.be/t4hCcdv21ns

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>>39297048
it's about the same price per inch

>>39297087
You seem to like BBQ
I don't

and chicken is more expensive but less bite for your buck
I want carbolicious bread and lots of it

>>39297089
WE NEED TO CHANGE THE LAW TO FORCE PEOPLE TO WATCH PEOPLE BEING BLOWN UP.
paraphrasing obviously but itv is one of the most disgusting tv channels on british tele.

>>39297051
>And now for the male insight we ask anon who's pro showering

just bought nice lil bb gun lads. might try and shoot the local pigeons or something when I'm bored.

>>39297028
fuck me that's cheap

>>39297123
The absolute GOAT stuffed crust had cream cheese and chives. Wish they still did it desu.

>>39297168
I tried the stuffed crust once
I dunno if mine was undercooked but the dough was very chewy and wasn't pleasant

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>>39297028
>17 bongs for some cheese, tomatos and wheat

>>39297179
b-but it's made by professional dominoes pizza artists

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>>39296910
>tfw rich piana is dead
I thought he was going to make it...fuck

>>39297178
It was probably done wrong but even still, getting some baked beans or even a canned breakfast is a surefire way to sort that right out.

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>>39297179
ooh, I can play this too

>15,000 bongs for some metal and rubber

>>39297143
They were literally saying
>in Japan it's encouraged to bathe with your teenaged children as it strengthens family bonds
The thoughts of momcest overwhelmed me, the funny thing is is that they have couldn't even fathom the idea that mom and son porn exists and the major proponent of it is Japan kek

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Produce Steel

>>39297089
>This is horrible! Think of the trauma to the families!
>Let's traumatise them and see how they like it!
Straight in the oven.

>>39297202
>and billions in research, development and labour

Try playing it correctly, moron

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>Tfw no local pizza takeaway
>Tfw no local burger takeaway
>Just endless kebabs and chinks
How are you supposed to binge and purge

>>39297210
Your steel is shit Xi. Nobody wants it.

>>39297219
You're meant to be off that noise, Tilde

>>39297202
How is that remotely similar? If you're paying 17 quid for some shitty dominos pizza then you're mentally spasticated

>>39297217
>pizza grows on trees and gets teleported to your front door

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Ploduce steer

>>39297228
It's not remotely similar, but when you have zero idea of what is even in a car (unlike a pizza which is literally just cheese, tomatos, and wheat...) you delude yourself into thinking it's a good analogy.

>>39297228
I was highlighting the false equivalency
I probably should have just said that though, that anon is thick as pig shit

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>it's STILL fucking hot
>flies everywhere

JUST FUCK OFF SUMMER FUCK OFF FUCK OFF FUCK OFF

>>39297242
You're comparing the manufacturing process of a car with the raw ingredients of a pizza

even if we reversed it it still doesn't make sense to compare the two

>>39297250
except it's not a false equivalency. you're literally paying 17 quid for some cheese, tomatos and wheat that will be gone in 10 minutes whereas a car has return value for years. there's also a lot more that goes into a car

>>39297264
read that >>39297262 and don't post again until you can show you've understood it

What's art called that's based on words but open to interpretation? if that makes sense, not typography though (at least I don't think) abstract wordart maybe? or would it just fall under abstract art?

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>the way she covers her hands with long sleeves because she's insecure
ADORABLE

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>>39297281
>What's art called that's based on words but open to interpretation?
Literature?

>>39297308
More like hiding man hands.

>>39297311
the words don't form coherent sentences so I don't think that's it

>>39297237

I really like this new spin off

>>39297308
yea insecure manhand trannies are really adorable
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZDjWLwqAPY

>>39297336
>>39297323
No boooly she is perfect

>>39297325
Sounds like graffiti.

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What is Xi's favourite thing to eat?

Mandarins

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jftyjv

Ooh it's VERY autism-y in here this afternoon.

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http://www.strawpoll.me/13784349

>>39297441
>tfw you basically ticked everything
About to have a hotel breakfast and stuff my fucking face, can't wait

>>39297441
it's a scotch pancake you bellend

>>39297470
Sounds belting lad. Forgot to include:
>Ham
>Salmon
>Gammon
>Preserves and jams
>Marmite

Intentionally didn't include cereal desu

>>39297472
It's shite is what it is

>>39297397
disgusting, how could anyone put something like that in their mouth

>>39297397
>>39297397
WOW WOW
I want that in my ass.

>>39297441
It's great and all but troublesome as hell to cook every morning.

I end up cooking it for dinner instead.

>>39297505
>It's shite is what it is

agreed, it looks absolutely vile.

Just got back from Jobcentre. Applied for Universal Credit on Wednesday and had the interview today. Now I need to spend 35 hours a week looking for work and I don't even get my money until late September at the earliest. How do you lads cope? I've never been on Jobcentre before.

>entire bottom 4/5 of phone screen pernenantly flashes bright green on and off over the top of everything
>don't want to pay to fix it because it technically still works

>>39297509
I would, that big dick makes me very hard

>>39297441
Anyone who prefers continental breakfast: leave now

>>39297517
>>39297562
I just cannot respect people like you

>>39297557

How is that even possible?
I wouldn't have thought more than one or two hours a week would be achievable.

>>39297568

Why? It's far superior to that lardy muck.

>>39297517
That's kinda gay lad

>>39297581
Idk man, the lady telling me said "just do five hours a day" as if it was common knowledge. I'm looking on Indeed and shop windows and stuff but I need to meet that 35 hour per week mark or else I get sanctioned.

I am too randy to be at work right now, it is ridiculous. Just caught a glimpse of some workplace cleavage and it's making me sweat something. Can't wait to get home today

>>39297568
>>39297586
English breakfast in comfy. Nuff said.

>>39297611

I still don't see how it's remotely achievable.

>>39297624
Me neither, my dude. Gonna try and get a retail job, a small apartment and just make a go of it.

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>>39297441
>tfw could eat everything on the list and still be hungry

Haha what a riot. Think I'll stick to cereals desu

>>39297557
Nobody actually spends 35 hours looking for work baka! You find about two jobs per day and """ apply""" for them. Insist on recording it on paper rather than their dumb website, they might get pushy but they can't force you to do it online lad. If you're strapped for cash you can apply to have some money in advance and they'll deduct a bit off future payments until it's repaid.

Good luck anon, UC is hell

>>39297586
Everyone laugh at this complete poofter
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>39297614
>English breakfast in comfy. Nuff said.

Just warm up some lard or other saturated fat and suck it through a straw. You'll save oodles of time and trouble.

question time lads. i'm going to attempt to make a fish broth with noodles thing for my tea but not sure what noodles to use. got a pack of rice noodles and a pack of egg noodles. should i just do a 50/50 mix of them both?

>female workmate talks about how she's going away to a friends on the weekend after work
>says she has her underwear and stuff in her bag
>feel myself go extremely red
>start stammering and can't look her in the eye anymore
really wanna take a peek inside that bag now lads

>>39297613
sly off for a cheeky work wank if you can

>>39297636

It's patently shit tier, greasy rubbish.
Maybe if I was backpacking in South America or something and there wa no other food.

It's certainly not something anyone with any self respect would eat by choice.

>>39297665
That sounds messy, I'd just stick to one. Rice noodles perhaps?

>>39297635
>Haha what a riot
stop that

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Ffs lads had a dream about shagging her last night this isnt funny

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I think I've reached the maximum level of depression, anons

It feels so strange

>>39297624

Time spent walking to/from the jobcentre counts. I used to drive for 10 minutes and claim I walk 90 minutes there, 90 minutes back

>>39297708
Get refugee tattooed above your dick, then she'll welcome your refugee.

>>39297709
There's always a bit more, you just haven't discovered it yet.

>>39297682
Good idea but kinda coming off it now. Tried to do it at my desk and nearly got caught so the mood has gone slightly

A girl has never sent me a naked picture of herself on snapchat. I hate my life and want to die.

>>39297743
Iktf kinda, closest I've ever gotten to noods was a grill sending me a photo of her sunburned back. You couldn't see anything lewd, but I still fapped anyway.

>>39297696
well only thing is the rice 1s might fall apart in the cooking process, would be gutted if they just turned to mush. bit nervous as it is making it from scratch.

>>39297708

I've had worse dreams.

Who else /gotpaidtoday/?

>>39297713

Ah, yes of course. still are you expected to go every day?

>>39297743
A girl sent ''''me a naked picture of herself on snapchat'''
It's even worse

>>39297635
Thanks for the tip, lad, I really appreciate it. They told me to keep the confirmation email (the one that says "Thank you for applying to [x]") as evidence of my application, do you have any tips for that? And maybe another cute anime girl to go with it?

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HE'S DEAD REEEEEEEEE

lads ive not spoken to a single human out side of my family irl since summer holiday started from uni. im going deeper into the rabbit hole pls send help. its been over 40 days

>>39297757
My mistake, I got one but it was on kik

>>39297785
Why man?

>>39297677
what the hell's wrong with you you pervert? a woman starts talking about her underwear to you and you go full autismo? jesus christ you people

>>39297635
>haha what a riot
JAMES STOP THAT THIS SECOND!

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>>39297794
Piana was practically begging for death let's be honest. Still, RIP

I can afford to eat until the end of the month IF I stick to this plan
I probably won't stick to this plan

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lads I haven't had sex in 24 FUCKING HOURS. Is this what robothood feels like? jesus christ I can't take this for much longer

>>39297777
Not until the fuckin 31th this month. Really long time since last on in comparison to normal.

>>39297873
Yeah I dont think he ever planned on living too long. He unironically made me start working out and even though he was a meme most people genuinely liked him. Fuck it gonna do arms today.

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>>39297723
No anon, I've really reached the final level of depression

There's no way it can possibly get worse now

>>39297915
>There's no way it can possibly get worse now

Kek! Life will accept that challenge.

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>>39296625
>nonsexykev.jpg
Don't be harsh on yourself.

- Kev x

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>>39297704
>>39297850
What's wrong with it lads?! Ebin says it all the time!

>>39297786
Hmm they never asked me to do that. You might have to apply for jobs. Most jobsites let you upload your CV so it's just a case of pushing apply. I cannot really provide anymore advice sorry. I suppose just being punctual and polite helps given the types of people they usually work with. Also a good idea to waste time when signing on by asking dumb questions, like if they have any jobsites they recommend. Try and waste time on pointless stuff because they only have a 10 minute (?) time frame in which to see you.

A lot of people in /britfeel/ have bennie experience so feel free to ask about anything

>>39297777
Got paid yesterday desu. Going to buy anything in particular lad?

Nice quads

>>39297900
Same here. Our payday is the last thursday of every month. I work in accounts so we always get the sodding blame for anything to do with salaries

>>39297929
I'd like to see life try

Anything can happen to me at this point and my mental state would remain as it is

>>39297976
Alright then, thanks a lot for the advice lad, it helps. Gonna get on Indeed and start applying. Keep it real, my man.

You're sitting at home when a self driving lorry plows through the wall, who do you blame? The lorry was just following its orders and the programmer just programmed it to follow the latest mapping data and the mapping company just use what the satellite gives them and the satellite just tells us what it sees.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-41038220

>>39297976
>Ebin says it all the time!
Ebin is a paedophile cunt.

>>39297984

Aye. Maybe you should just do as mummy tells you.

>>39297977
Thats exactly how it works at our place. Really nice when it's a fast one but extra shit when it's like this.

>>39297976
>Nice quads
They are called Kevs you bellend. That shows how much you get involved with /britfeel/ outside of the personality drama.

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My 'payday' comes ever other thursday. Thanks for paying your taxes wagecucks

>>39298024
I thought kevs were specifically for dubs?!

>>39298034
>tfw my wage is tax-free
Feels good bruh.

>>39298034

Do you get enough to cover the cost of a decent meal out?

bloody ell lads, just had to lever this massive heavy branch that I cut down and fell over the fence into neighbour's garden back over into mine

bloody heavy thing and left a big burning scratch down my forearm from when I finally got it levered up and started sliding towards me

>>39298094

Chicks dig scars.

This neet lifestyle is fucking killing me mentally. Wish one of these jobs would get back to me or something.

>>39298044
Is no one going to check this? Nice Kevs tilde lad

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Order a chinese takeaway tonight

>>39298106
>This neet lifestyle is fucking killing me mentally. Wish one of these jobs would get back to me or something.

Being without cash is killing you mentally.

>>39298150
>Being without cash
I'm leeching off my parents and I'm still dying inside.

>>39298146
nope.
making my own tea.

>>39298144
check the checker
kevs are abundant

>>39298021
...w-we don't work at the same place, do we?

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Place your bets lads. Bigest fight in last 5 years. Im putting 100 on McGregor

>>39298146
Nah, no Chinese takeaways here have online delivery and I'm too scared to ring one up

>>39298189
100p i hope

>>39298150
Not at all. Money doesn't matter to me.

I've got no motivation to do anything anymore, at least when I worked or was in education I had something to work towards or things I had interest in doing once I got home. Having the ability to do what I want when I want means I've done it all.

>>39298189
Boxer vs non boxer in a boxing match, ah yes.

>>39298146
Nah mate, fish and chips tonight from a BRITISH fish and chippy.

>>39298189
>I'm throwing away 100 bongs
y tho

>>39298189
Mayweather. McGregor won't have the stamina to go multiple rounds if Mayweather defends well enough.

>>39298228
>Mayweather defends
Isn't that basically all he did the last time and still won through some bullshit judging?

>>39298235
I believe so, but if he defends enough to tire Gregor out, it probably make it a easier win. One that might not rely on such shit judging.

>>39298199

How do you manage to pack so much utter drivel into such a small space?

There's a job for you in advertising lad.

how long have these threads been a meme?

>offer to help girl from work fix her vape pen
>don't know anything about that shit but she's hot so I want to look manly and dependable in front of her
>fiddle around with it for a minute, no idea what I'm doing
>accidentally touch the mouthpiece with my bare hands
>she tells me not to do that, say sorry as she wipes it clean
>don't manage to fix the pen in the end but she thanks me anyway
>just remembered I'd touched my bare knob with my hand about 5 minutes earlier
>she is now putting her lips on my cock indirectly
>my fucking dick.jpg
Gonna fap so hard to this later

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>>39298269
Meme? What you mean?

>>39298204

Bit bland and the nutritional & calorific equivalent of eating a sponge soaked in Mazola. But if you like that kind of ting I suppose it's alright once in a while.

>>39298257
What utterly useless feedback.

Job in HR for you too.

Just woke up from a nap, gotta take the hounds for a run and then going to the shop, you lads want anything?

Also thinking about rolling another joint seeing as this will be the last time in an while I'm going to get to smoke.

>>39298183
I doubt it. It's probably a common thing and all the accountants at my place are women.

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>go into town to wander around the shops for a bit
>get home after a few of hours
>look in the mirror
>realise my t-shirt was on backwards the whole time

fugg

>>39298282
>Not wanting a sponge soaked in Mazola
Are you even British?

>>39298189
If this match was MMA rules, McGregor all day and it would be exciting to watch. As it is, you might as well fight Mayweather yourself for all the chance he has. It is cowardly as fuck for Mayweather to insist on a match like this where the whole thing is skewed completely in his favour. Inside a cage though, I'd bet on McGregor.

>benis is tiny when soft
>average size when hard
What did I mean by this?

>>39298343

Sometimes I wonder lad, those times are called "meal times".

>>39298298
I see, I'm not a gril sadly. The other person in the department is but she's my mum

>>39298365
You're a grower not a shower? Fairly common mate.

>>39298364
>it would be exciting to watch
Connor could legitimately kill him in less than 30 seconds.

>>39298377
That's more exciting than another Mayweather boxing match.

>>39298377
And I would like to see that. But Mayweather is billed as a genius boxer. Surely it's so legit a ground-hug brute couldn't touch him.

>>39298364
It would just easily go to whoever sport they were in. In the UFC would be more entertaining though solely because of the way the sport works.

fucking hell lads I want out of Somerset the women here are the worst in the country, nay, the world

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>>39298105
Your not wrong on that one, ive got this massive diagonal one going right down by the bottom of my eyebrow across my eyelid and down to the top of my cheek and people including girls always ask me about it and say I look like a bond villian.

Its from where I tripped over my dog when I was younger dressed up as harry potter with a bit of garden cane in my hand pretending it was a wand, only to trip up and end up impaling my eye on the bit of cane which i still had in my hand against the force of me crashing on the floo.r apparently the stick was sticking right out of my eye and my nan had to pull it out,
Luckily it was a couple of centermeters away from my eye and it was left untouched but im left with a propper nasty looking scar along the left side of my face.

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Lets play a game britfeel!

What is this?

>>39298106

how long have you been neet

i'm at nearly 5 years and eventually you just stop caring and wait for your death

>>39298411
Digger

>>39298395
But there is nothing in boxing (afaik) that Mayweather could not use in a cage. There is a huge portion of McGregor's arsenal he's had to sacrifice. This is 100% of one man at the top of his game vs about 30% of someone else's.Plus, there was all that legal stuff about if he gets pissed off and just murders Mayweather he's totally fucked. Mayweather would be too afraid to fight him, on any terms other than those that completely favour him. McGregor was a fool to agree to it.

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Round two!

what is this?

>>39298421
Correct!

>>39298411
Excavator

>>39298287
Yeah, get me a gf please

Oh and a four pack of bevs

>>39298422
>McGregor was a fool to agree to it.
He's going to make 100 million. As long as he doesnt get knocked the fuck out in the first round his reputation will be fine.

>>39297441
>One turkey bacon
Found the Paki

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>>39297777
Me lad, what a nice friday

>>39298436
Trigger

you've been triggered xd

>>39298436
Yeah we get it, niggers. Great meme lad.

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Final round!

What is this?

>>39298454
Correct!

>>39298170
Do you feel guilty? The guilt is killing me, I need to get a job asap but this is also quite comfy

>>39298466
darkie

>>39298466
>What is this?
someone who gets laid more than you

>>39298466
A gentleman with a dark complexion.

>>39298411
New Holland Mini Crawler Excavator E18B

>>39298466
Melaninated individual

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all honesty cooking the super noodles is a waste of time they taste better as a processed crunchy noodle bar out of the packet

you can't really consume the flavour bag though unless you were to snort the contents up your nose but thats unhealthy but so are super noodles

Hey guys, NIGGERS LMAO

>>39298466
Male model for a stock photo

>>39298466
one Boneless niBBA

>>39298189
>>39298364
>>39298364
>>39298395
>>39298235
how can anyone sit through boxing? It's so fucking boring compared to UFC

I watched the mayweather pacman fight and almost fell asleep, complete waste of money imo

>>39298364
>It is cowardly as fuck for Mayweather to insist on a match like this
Yes why doesn't the boxer fight mma for the first time in his life? what a coward

>>39298492
you can throw the flavor packet over the noodles and it trickles through, I actually used to do it but I used to break it up and mix it into the flavouring

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>>39298511
Read that as Paxman and got confused for a second

Well lads just failed my maths test again. I didn't pass my maths at GCSE had to redo them at college just go the results today and saw that I got a E just kill me already please.

>>39298411
diggy machine

>>39298511
Heavyweights can sometimes be exciting like Joshua/Klitsko but really the sport has been on it's arse for a long time.

>>39298492
Go to your nearby Chinese supermarket and buy some noodles there. Super noodles are mushy shit that shouldn't even qualify as noodles.

>>39297568
A DELIGHT TO THE CENSUS

>>39298523
There there lad, I know someone who failed his maths 4 times and he has a fairly decent job now.

>>39298523
think some people might be naturally incapable at maths, I struggle with basic maths too. So much so I've had to give up on a functional maths course

>>39298492
Sod that prepare for the worst tummy ache of your life, last time I ended up undercooking mine as i couldnt be arsed waiting for ages, boy did i wish I waited a few minutes later it my like my stomach was being twisted and stabbed all over the place.

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>>39298518
Ebin thoughts on Rich Piana dying? Why dont you start lifting?

Threads over now lads. Pack up.

>>39298411
diBBa

Lads, help us out with this conundrum, fish and chips or dominoes. Here are the pros and cons

Fish and chip pros:
Cheaper
Probs less calories over all
Don't have it that often
Has protein

Fish and chip cons:
Have to walk to go get it
Would also have to go buy mixer for booze
Did have fish and chips last week (even tho I don't have it all that often general)

Dominoes pros:
Gets delivered to me
Comes with a drink
Can eat it in bed

Dominoes cons:
More expensive
Probs less healthier

I'll take votes or highest rolls

Has Len been on recently?

>>39298466
just a normal member of society

>>39298558
don't want to look like an over-inflated freak and die prematurely

>>39298575
Fish and Chips mate.
Proper craving some cause of you now.

>>39298580
You can work out and not take steroids.

>>39298553
Haha what. I've been eating raw noodles my entire life and its never done anything to me

>>39298546
>think some people might be naturally incapable at maths
If you can't pass maths gcse you're just a retard. I got an A when it's my worst subject

>>39297708
>>39297770
This kinda looks like her so might have a bash to it

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sul6ig7UWLw

>>39298575
fish and chips, pizza is disgusting

>>39298597
too scared of going to the gym and I don't know how to start there because I'm too weak to do push ups

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>>39298605
You got an A but you still post here

>>39298580
but you still look like a freak and are probably going to die prematurely. might as well get swole Ebin

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>>39298553

i got sick the first time but then i started eating more bagged noodle cakes and i sort of got used to it

>>39298594
I stopped having fish and chips because the two places near me have a food hygiene rating of 2. Fuck that

>>39298616
I just bought some dumbells and workout at home. I used to be super weak and skelly you just have to start eating a lot and follow a basic workout plan.

>>39298580
Implying you don't want to die prematurely?

>>39298617
I actually got 4A*s and 5As at IGCSEs and I still post here. It's been a slow decline ever since
>tfw peaked at 15

>>39298616
Yo Ebbs, get on the floor and position yourself like your taking it doggy style, arms out in front but not to wide, dip down leading with your chest and push yourself up with your arms, its good cheat if you can't do full push ups, give me 20 now and I promise I wont bully you for the rest of the thread

>>39298575
Curry
>keeps you regular
>is probably healthier than both fish and chips and dominos
>middling price but best value for money
>some indians deliver beer
>can eat it in bed, you can eat anything in bed you pussy
>is curry

Lads which should I do?
1. Continue to incrementally improve my life, including fitness, relationships and job prospects
CONS - Ignoring existential dread
- No animes
- No alcohol

2. Throw all of my progress away and wallow in alcoholic self-pity watching animes
CONS:
- Finances may suffer, along with relationships and sanity
- Expensive and unhealthy

>>39298647
>IGCSEs
Those don't count.

>>39298636
I went to this Chinese place quite often, it shut down randomly out of the blue. Turns out it got a 1 in the hygiene rating. Odd as the food was spot on and never got the impression of it being dirty.

>>39298605
>tfw 3 marks off an A
>got a remark and got 2 marks off an A

>>39298649
>position yourself like your taking it doggy style
Are you trying to teach him push ups or give him an erection?

>>39298638
what are some good dumbell exercises?

>>39298668
Never hurts to have a third arm to help in the push ups.

>>39298659
Do 1 for a couple of years. You can always become a drunken sack of shit later

>>39298647
The fuck is an IGCSE, some kind of spastic kid thing?

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>>39298659
First one lad, keep making yourself better

>>39298662
But IGCSEs are more difficult than GCSEs anon

>>39298679
>he doesn't do cock push ups
It's like you don't even want to make it

>>39298638
I have minimal room so I'm put off, I can just about do a push up when my room is clean

>>39298640
technically no, if I want to live now I want to live a long time. Not because i'll have a family or any reason to live, I just want to see what the future looks like chances are it'll be grim as fuck so I won't feel bad from dying or having nobody to leave behind. That's what I tell myself now anyway

>>39298649
I actually have room sort of now I cleaned my room, i'll go to do it. I'll try a push up first and see what happens

>>39296532

Of course it's "moreish", you fucking cow. They designed that shit in a lab to make you a fat idiot.

>>39298671
You can work out pretty much your entire body with dumbells. Start with full body workouts 3 times a week and then figure out a routine from there

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0bhE67HuDY

>>39298709
>I have minimal room so I'm put off
Same. I also sleep on a matress on the floor and have to put it up against the wall to workout. It's doable though

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Eat soy products

>>39298734
no thank you I like being a man

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>>39298575
Go for plaice and chips, that is banging.

>>39298749

it usually at least tastes of fish.

>>39298734

>talking to vegan/vegetarian girl about non-dairy milk yeah, I've got game
>tells me never to drink soya milk again because of all the oestrogen

I thought it was just 4chan memes desu.

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Going to go collect my remarks now. The other night I had a dream where I got my remarks and they had come back AAB, hope I get at least that because then I'll probably reapply to Cambridge

>>39298749
It does sound good but I am leaning towards dominoes, I did so much tossing cardio today, I dont want to move any more

>>39298766
I hope you fail again. The tantrum you had last time was funny as fuck.

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>>39298709
>constantly encourage you to do push ups and tell you what to do if you can't do them
>you refuse
>a random anonymong tells you to do push ups
>you agree to do them first time

>>39298766
But if you make it to Cambridge how will you have time to blog?

>>39298788
Its because I cleaned my room a couple of days ago so I now probably just about have room, It was impossible before

>>39298788
Don't worry lad. Plenty of us hate the cunt.

>>39298788
Maybe it because your a trip, no offense or anything but it much easier to hate a voice telling you to do something with a name compared to just a random statement that came from the void

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>GP finally calls
>rings for like a second
>get phone
>missed call

Ah yes. Waited all day for this haha

>>39298801
I'll add you to the spreadsheet if you do start doing them

10 minutes until my curry is ready

>>39298834
Post pic when it's done.
orig

>>39298801

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6YLZTDQeEEw

One night in Scarborough

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>/Fit/her forgive me for I have sinned

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>>39298744
THEN YOULL DIE LIKE A MAN

>Used to have jungle fever
>So many black women are coconuts these days
>Was speaking to a black woman last night
>Just didn't feel a thing like I would have a year ago

shippy, do you think driving jobs will be fucked in 10-20 years? do you have a contingency plan for a post van-driving life?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-41038220

>>39298759
Your not wrong on that one, I find that cod and haddock hardly taste of anything and are pointless even having anymore.

>>39298865

Domino's is such dreck too, mate. I got a flyer for them yesterday and the "Lotta'-Chocca' Pizza" or whatever made me viscerally upset.

>>39298865
You people make me fucking sick. I'm going to go train my abs and then make a healthy, nutricious lunch. Later I will cook a healthy, nutritious dinner. I am fitter than you will ever be

could someone rate my routine? not looking to get big just get healthier


each exercise is until failure unless otherwise specified

push ups
planks
side planks
pull ups
dips
cycling 30 minutes minimum

any advice is helpful lads

>>39298578
He posted a couple days ago and said he's been ill, theory is saku has pozzed him with his toxic butthole

>>39298873
Yes I will die like a man, while you die like a woman. Who wins?

>>39298916
Have different day focusing on each of the main muscles groups, one day for arms, one for legs, one for back/abs and a cardio day

>>39298927
Hope he gets well soon then.

>>39298931
this still apply if I'm not trying to put on muscle mass?

>>39298916
That's a decent start. Are you just doing 1 set until failure? If so that's accomplishing next to nothing

Also if you want to be healthy, 30 minutes of cycling is going to do fuck all. Go running

Is this every day?

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>>39298928
WOMEN LIVE LONGER. I WIN

>>39298895

Automation is a meme, We don't have a single automated truck/van on the road in the UK, and even now they can only operate in special circumstances like easy motorways. I think when they finally get introduced in the initial stage (2025) they will require a human driver as a back up for at least 15 years.

I think that automated trucks might shuttle goods between a network of regional distribution centres on the motorways, and then human drivers will navigate the local routes from there.

There's a good 30% chance of me facing redundancy within a year anyway, it'll be a real shame to lose this comfy part time job. I don't want a full time one, and I don't want an early start. 3 days a week with a start time of 11am is perfect.

>>39298944
Why are you working your muscles if you don't want to put on muscle?

>>39298947
Live longer, suffer longer

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>>39298912
its so bad but so good, I hate myself for it but I am starving out my mind, I just need a fix dude

>>39298915
Trust me lad, I wish I had the strength to, just got back from my hour long cardio session, I try to be good, but sometimes I just break

>>39298944
Yep, strength training is an excellent way of losing weight

>>39298945
starting at one set until failure then upping it as I go, exercise bike has strong resistance settings and I don't want to leave my house and yes everyday
>>39298963
lose weight and improve cardiovascular health

>>39298927
Damn, he got the gift. Lucky boy.

>>39298964
not the anon you replied to but
>not hating yourself so much you prolong your life as much as possible

>>39298970
>lose weight
Eat less and run more
>improve cardiovascular health
Do cardiovascular exercises. The calories you burn with strength training is minimal compared to cardio (hence why it's called cardio)

Also that's not a good training method, it's better to do many small sets

>>39298957
That's what I thought, just overly optimistic pseudo futurology mongs who keep peddling the automation meme. And when there's the inevitable accident the public will lose faith in the technology

>>39298981
I feel like there's an expanding intellect meme in here somewhere...
>living a long, miserable life
>living a short, happy life
>living a short, miserable life
>becoming immortal with the intention of being miserable forever

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>>39298575
Asked my brother if he wanted fish and chippies or dominoes, he went for dominoes squaking about some sort of discount code.

I just want chippies guys, it's not too much to ask is it?

Automation's kinda shitty but at least it'll curb third world immigration, right?

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>>39298877
>tfw I used to have yellow fever yet overnight suddenly realised how essesntial it is for whites to keep between themselves if we want to see whites on this earth in the future.

>>39298838

Will give it a bit of a stir before I eat it

can't believe anyone gets dominoes desu, maybe 3 years ago

papa johns makes the better pizza and is often cheaper, and pizza hut is about the same level of quality as dominoes and regularly has good deals

>>39298915
fit people eat pizza too
I doubt that lad can afford twenty quids worth of pizza every day

>>39298992
>And when there's the inevitable accident the public will lose faith in the technology
Yea it's not like hundreds of accidents are already happening every day right? Automation would reduce accidents

>>39299032
Once in a whle yeah, but a lot of the fat cunts here get takeaway all the time or shitty ready meals

>>39299037
doesn't matter, the public are stupid and if there was a huge accident caused by automation alone rationality would be thrown out of the window and there would be huge pressure on government to add restrictions as people wouldn't feel safe around automated trucks

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>>39298838
>>39299028

forgot to include the actual pic

>>39299029

They all taste like ketchup on a chappati.

>>39299054
then you're setting the bar pretty low comparing yourselves to them eh?

>>39299060
You make a good point Ebin.

>>39299023
>letting /pol/ decide who you want to bang

>>39299060

Give it 50 years and it'll be the reverse people will be afraid of the ones with people at the wheel.

>>39299070
Wow do you want some curry with that rice?

>>39299072
I'm not setting any bar to compare to myself to, I'm telling the fat cunts here to stop eating like shit and start exercising

LAZY LARDS OUT

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>>39299029
>Not ordering pizza from an indpendent family run italian restraunt and instead chosing a shitty american fast food chain

>>39299093

fuck off gym boy.

>>39299078
>implying that spastic even has the choice between whites or asians
Beggars can't be choosers lad, he's probably a virgin

>>39299093
for all you know this might be the first pizza he's ordered in years

>>39299086
It's like those shitty microwave meals you buy where it's all just sauce and rice with 2 pieces of chicken in it

This is why you should cook from scratch at a fraction of the price

>>39299095
all my local takeouts do great kebabs and chicken but not a single one knows how to do a better pizza than your regular pizza chains

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>>39299070

lot of rice

>>39299079
If I managed to get myself into driving jobs I wouldn't have to worry about 50 years in the future, chances are there will have to be some form of basic income by then and i'll have saved a decent chunk of money.

future predictions are always questionable, just look at what people were saying 50 years ago compared to today, don't think its worth trying to take that length of time into consideration. 10-20 years is more of a reasonable time to plan in

>>39299106
stay obese lard boy

>>39299114
fuck you
everybody (EVERYBODY) should take a cullinary course, grow their own vegetables, raise their own meat and fashion their own crockery from clay

anything less is just fucking pointless desu
you fatass

>>39299130
nice coping mechanism fatty

>>39299151
nice argument fatty

Automated cars have already had accidents, and already 1 death.

If we even assume automation does happen, people massively blow out of proportion how fast uptake is. Debit cards have existed for 30 years and Cash is still more popular in 2017.

Automation shills on /pol/ back in 2012 said "Truck drivers will all be unemployed in 5 years" yet 5 years later more truck drivers are employed now than in 2012

>>39299130

i live on a diet of pot noodles and space raiders fuck your cabbages

>>39299125

Well, okay. in 10-20 years you'll still be vegetating on your mattress talking about getting a driving job.

Right at this moment getting and holding a job is several social steps above anything you're capable of.

what is it with pajeets and rape?
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-india-41049705

>>39299129

Supersize me.

>>39298865
>Diet coke
>Eats a load of shit anyway

lol

why do fatties always do this

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>>39299159
>Right at this moment getting and holding a job is several social steps above anything you're capable of.

>>39299159

Ebin has made a lot of prgress in Comeback August. In 10 years he'll probably be above you in personal and social development

>>39299176

No point in lying to you lad. The world isn't going to hand you the bits of life you want while allowing you to opt out of everything else. sorry there.

>>39299188

LOL. Off you fuck, there's a good merchant.

>>39296636
are you thicc like the pepe

>>39299175
lmao I know, I wouldnt call my self a fatty tho, 5'9", 10 st 2.5 pounds, its just a lapse in my self control, if I'm going to do it might as well mitigate some of the damage and not drink a load of sugar

>>39299155
>Automated cars have already had accidents, and already 1 death
>1732 people died from cat accidents in the UK in 2015
>186, 209 injured

>>39299175

Because Diet coke tastes better than regular coke