/britfeel/

Any gay lads in london?
would prefer it if you looked like sexy kev

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>only 1 (ONE) week to go

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>>39283382
>>39283395
>>39283426
>>39283477
KEK HE'S ONLY GONE AND DIED BY HIMSELF THE ABSOLUTE MADMAN

>>39283448
Aw, this made me sad

press f to pay respec

I feel each passing day is a day closer to the inevitable discovery of the jackpot that is tilde and ebins dox .

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1st for fuck tripnonces

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>>39286182
stop this now reeeeeeeeeeeee

it's comeback 2017 anyway, we still have another 4 months

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To the guy who posted that latest vocaroo on the previous thread, thank you so much for giving my sides a good rustling

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>>39286150
[blog]Well lads. This will conclude another dismal birthday. The whole stigma around the day is easy to ignore; I could just buy myself some tasty food in the evening and relax during the day. But it's far easier said than done, for me anyways.

Getting text reminders every few hours from distant relatives - who don't even give a fuck about you - just reminds you of the day and what actually comes with it. Made me realise spending it alone, no friends even know it's my birthday because I haven't spoken to him in 2 years now, family don't care but just don't wanna sound rude, realisation even your family dog gets more gifts(not that they mean anything anyways) just gives me un-needed reminders of my mediocre life.

Turning another year older is also pretty shit because you know what is ahead of you and how fast it's coming at you. I remember being a lil' lad waking up everyday for school and really hating it; just wanting to be grown up. And now I am, I ironically want to be that 13 year old lad attending school and not doing my homework, to be pulled back by teachers for a missed break.

Now I'm having to rush to find a uni before I dry up and am rejected by everyone due to age.

The worse part is not being able to remember those amazing birthday's from youth, where you were genuinely happy and loved life. Now it just seems we as humans are alive to be used by other humans, treated like shit and spat out of society without anyone even blinking an eye. But as I seemingly age and years go on, I know I'll hit a point when life quality will inevitably decline at a rapid rate; this being unpreventable. Not due to anything I've done to fuck thing up even further, but due to age.

(cont.)

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going to listen to Sleep and then get into bed and attempt it myself

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQcE4_7-X78

https://vocaroo.com/i/s1QZtMWaZx7a

my gf broke up with me a while ago and i haven't talked to her in about a month. i miss her so much. should i message her?

>>39286235
Tee EI Dee Are

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Milk Cat 163

>>39286245
Nah, take it from someone who knows, that will make you alot worse

>>39286227
he's a good lad, the one he posted the thread before genuinely had me in tears

>>39286104
>https://vocaroo.com/i/s1VUNCsD4atS

Here's my reply to that, you weak cunt.

https://vocaroo.com/i/s1E99TyLbbuZ

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>>39286235
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lg6goayNUNc
Is it even worth living at that point knowing within the near future you'll develop a fatal illness that will slowly incapacitate you until you eventually circum to the inevitable death that has been waiting for you. And all that life in the run up is used to aid others unless you're a lucky bastard that got to escape wage slavery and make something of yourself. And honestly, what is the point at that point of living a shit life just so some rich cunt can earn more money to buy a yacht or a new home in Spain?

It's better just to throw in that sweaty, bloody towel early than suffer through it with no incentive or reward at the end of the tunnel.

And as I listen to link related, the lines "Live till you die" seem pretty accurate. No point slaving for some fat, rich cunt whilst suffering through your boring shitty life. Might as well have a bit of fun whilst you can. And fun is pretty much individual. Maybe in the near future I'll throw all my savings into a ridiculously powered motorbike or car to blast around in whilst I'm still breathing.[/blog]

Whatever happens, I foresee a short life for myself, however it'll end. Just wanted to share my little story, hope not to bore.

>>39286245
No. Stay strong, maybe have a wank

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>>39286242
>they don't sleep on the beach anymore
I know old guy :(

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Evening lads
What should I photoshop to end off the night?

Post waifus

Made the tacos, well I think. Idk what tacos are. Its something called spicy mixed taco beans in a tortillawrap with cheese. Isn't that just a wrap?

Anyway it's just falling apart as I eat it

>>39286302
photoshop my willy in your waifu's mouth haha

>>39286302
Give her a dick.
original

>>39286315
That's what you get for using animal products in your food. Stay vegan. Stay strong

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>>39286200
Tildes got more to lose having a job that people can find tilde at, I may as well be a phantom

>>39286243
this isn't shipanon or one of his BNP mates is it?

>>39286227
that response to the other vocaroo was some very good stuff. Made me fall forward in cringe/laughter

>>39286302
do an 80s style wojak or a wojak with headphones

>>39286315
Maybe you fill it with too much stuff.
Post pic. I'm hungry.

>>39286150
As Salaam Alaikum oh my brother's.

May Allah watch over you all, his children as you post throughout the night in this, his thread.

In'Sha Allah.

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>>39286348
Why do you feel the need to tripfag on an anonymous image board?

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>>39286348
>this isn't shipanon or one of his BNP mates is it?

Hahahaha of course not lad

>>39286326
>>39286332
Going to pass
and of course that isnt original.
>>39286348
That'll be a job and a half but I'll try

>>39286376
>questioning ebin
delet

>>39286376
It was a slow spiral into it now i'm in too deep to quit

dumb animeposters

oregano

>>39286243
>>39286348
https://vocaroo.com/i/s1xuPDMccM7k

>>39286290

*Sigh* Lighten up Francis.

>>39286315
Isn't taco the kind where you overstuff it and just fold it into something like a semi circle? A wrap doesn't have that much stuff and actually roll into a...wrap.

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Is Ebin dead? Is he mourning being cucked?

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>get up early so i can sleep at night
>stay up to 6am anyway
>have to get up early for somnething
>stay up to 6am anyway, spend entire day like a zombie
>STILL stay up to 6am

>>39286406
He seems to be posting just fine so maybe next time.

BritNormie is unironicly my favourite Scotsman

>>39286386
Hearing voices of posters is surreal really, I'm not sure if I like it because now its a real person saying that stuff and not just text. Same problem I have when someone speaks on voice comm in a game and I have to instantly mute them. If hearing just a voice for 6 seconds makes me a mess what will meeting someone in real life be like?

>>39286406
I'm probably leaving, I'm tired and I'm not doing anything again so its inevitably leading to a bad conclusion

>>39286386
Peculiar accent you've got there, a lot less Scottish than the last time I remember. Were you putting it on?

>>39286457
Anyone else planning on doing an all nighter? Ebin is sleepy

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>>39286351
You're not hungry anymore

>>39286457

We heard your voice in the scratchcard vid though

>>39286457
You've heard my voice several times before in the thread today, although I was putting on a voice I suppose.
>>39286466
It gets stronger when I've been drinking or smoking weed. I'm stone cold sober at the moment. Three pints is enough to go from "You don't sound like you're from Scotland" to "What did you say? Can you speak slower please?"

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Lain?
is the best poster

>>39286489
You clearly overstuff that if you're trying to make a wrap. Did you even fold it properly?

That asides, is that Iceberg lettuce that comes in a bag of 90p? I make my wraps with those too.

Tummy hurts lads

>>39286509
I know but these are directly referencing me rather than being about something else, makes it feel like the voice is talking to me and being directed at me

>>39286492
I posted a few vocaroos before too.

>>39286509
Wait you were Tarquin?? How did I not tell...

That was some good OC mate, you had me in stitches

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who else here /tescofrequenter/

Slowly weened myself off trannys to cute girls with strapons. At least now it's not technically gay r-right

>>39286540
Come here bby I'll rub it for you and make the pain go away

>>39286567
Girl on girl strap-on porn?

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>>39286548
mfw never heard Ebin's voice cos newfag

>>39286529
>You clearly overstuff that if you're trying to make a wrap.
I'd hate to call you a racist at my dinner party but I believe its a little more sophisticated than that
Did you even fold it properly?
No I don't know how
>That asides, is that Iceberg lettuce that comes in a bag of 90p? I make my wraps with those too
Yes, it's Moroccan, I like it it's quite subtle

>>39286565
nah, nearest tesco is a 15 minute drive or a 45 minute walk
but they're the only place around me I know that sells ice cream sundae pop tarts

LADS, lads, i've had no internet for 3 days and i've got that blasted sky shield up atm, but when I try to change it it says Im not a registered customer even though I am, got to wait a day or two for it to realise who I am, so I've had a drink tonight, something I dont do very often, done a bottle of wine and some rose, I just want you to know I love you all, you've really helped me this year. To turn the madness of my life into a happy community. Seriously.

>>39286557
Haha cheers man. Was too good to resist. I hope the lad does manage to come out to his parents ok though.

>>39286591
since everyone else has and I plugged my mic back in, here.
https://vocaroo.com/i/s019B3Ryis5b

>>39286616
We love you too anon, originally

>>39286616
change your dns to the google one, that should get rid of the shield

Only gone and developed a girl giving rimjobs fetish lads haha

>>39286648
You are immigrant?

Does life get easier the less fat you are? I suspect so.

>>39286648
wwwwwwhat the fuck the aspergers is uncanny

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>>39286348
Came out a bit shit but here you go Ebin.

>>39286678
british born and bred

>>39286616
If you're gonna be off for 3 days anyway, why not go shit up some board since the ban would expire by the time you come back anyway?

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>would do a voice clip for the lads but no mic

might get a selfie next time im out with a hooded jacket on though, with most of my face covered ofcourse

>>39286620
Britnormie lad did you make the rejected from Cambridge character?

>>39286682
No.
Putting socks on gets easier, but that's about it.
I'm still the weak little bitch I was 12 stone ago

>>39286693
no i mean no internet, my mum just came back from london so took over the sky subscription cause she was living with her mum who has now died.

>>39286690
Where's the headphone, senpai?

>>39286690
this isn't a wojak but its a good enough pepe to save anyway

>>39286704
what ground is that? ever thought about venturing onto the pitch?

>>39286684
heh hoh anon dis ish mei vois

>>39286716
Don't people treat you differently?

>>39286705
No. Fucking wish I thought of it though. If he's really a character it's a great one. Perfect wind up.

I did post pretending to be him being sad about not getting bummed though.

>>39286730
I don't know any people that aren't my family
I started a job 3 months ago but I'd already lost most of the weight by then

>>39286720

https://vocaroo.com/i/s1iHdYpHfmby

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>>39286719
That would be a bit annoying for tonight
>>39286720
>tfw don't read the wojak bit and assumed you wanted another 80s pepe
wew

>>39286720

DW(used to be JJB) stadium in wigan, and ive though of it many times but it just isnt worth the risk, the area is covered in CCTV cameras

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>>39286741
did he just fucking say Susan?
shippy confirmed to be locking up ebin and taking out his lust for susan on him

Has /britfeel/ ever done a meetup? Let's all meet in trafalgar square lads

>>39286760
No a few anons have met each other on rare occasions though.

>>39286760
>2 hours away
No thanks.

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>>39286741
https://vocaroo.com/i/s0NWpwQlDZCa

>tfw trying to focus on speaking clearly and so I speak slow

>>39286749
tinpot team and stadium

>>39286798
why are you literally salad fingers

>>39286798

You have the strongest Yorkshire accent I've heard

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>>39286798

the rugby team or the football team? im not a fan of either, not actually a resident of wigan anyway des

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>>39286798

>tfw I've ruined Scarborough September by Vocaroo

>>39286838
M E N T I O N E D
domo origato

I love the smell of sweaty vaginas. Also, does anyone else get creeped out by the Royal Marines advert?

>>39286835
Why are you surprised about that? He's never left Yorkshire even once in his life.

>>39286838
the football team is incredibly tinpot, I don't know anything abotu rugby

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>straight to wok noodles
>dont even own a wok

I aussme you dont need one r-right?

>>39286879
I bet he can trace back all his ancestors to within ten miles of his house.

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>>39286890

the only thing i really know about wigan athletic is the chant "we come from wigan and we live in mud huts"...they have to be the only fans of any sports team on earth who publicly degrade themselves

>>39286894
yes if you were to make asian food in some western pig pan it would all just catch fire

>>39286894
I literally own the same coloured dressing gown as that guy and I'm cooking instant noodles now wtf. My life's a fucking mess

>>39286906

My great grandmother (born 1902) was born in a village 9 miles away, her father and his father up until 1507 were born in that same village

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>>39286720
have an 80s wojak too after my fuckup

Trip and I die in my sleep tonight.

Beggars and charity peddlers on the street always approach me.

Do I have the virgin walk or something? What is it?

>>39286856
https://vocaroo.com/i/s1HxGPhRvuOx

came out way poorer than i'd have hoped

>>39287003
unlucky there laddy

>>39287034
I like the way you assumed Susan must be Chinese

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>It's a stay up all night, listen to pink floyd and browse /r9k/ episode

ffs not again

>>39287034
You sound like that badly burned Albanian boy

Hope I can lose at least a stone in 3 months, lads. Not too difficult, right?

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dubs and nothing ever changes

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>>39287052
I want to go to sleep but I'm not sleepy.
Should I just wank myself to sleep?

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Who /Denbo/ here?

>>39287050
>>39287053
Don't ask me what it is, I can't answer. I just tried to put on a female voice and that was that. I'm also whispering so my brothers can't hear me doing it

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>>39286980
this is probably marginally better but I'm too tired to think right now

>>39287034
>tfw it turns out ebin is the master of disguise and is actually a criminal genius like in The Usual Suspects

>>39287060
>stone
People actually use this unit?

>>39287060
Depends lad. Could be extremely difficult if you don't have a good plan.

>>39287095
It's pretty modular. 14 lbs to a stone and all that
>>39287060
I've been losing a stone a month for a couple months and its not been too bad.

>>39287095
Aye, British people do mate. Time to fuck off

>>39287095
Fine, 12lb, 6kg whatever you like

>>39287103
I'm doing slimming world and one day a week fast. Odd indulgence here and there. Calories normally 1400-1800

Lake district is pretty nice lads

>>39287118
>I've been losing a stone a month
From how much to how much?

>>39287070
I always get too stimulated by going on porn then I'm more awake again. Honestly if you want to sleep you should read a book m8, failing that watch a comfy film in bed

>>39287123
it's not 12 pounds ya mong

Vegan lad here. Just ate some haribo, guess I'm not a vegan anymore. Is situational vegan a thing? It seems if the food is already purchased and it'll go in the bin If uneaten, eating it makes absolutely no difference to the world. Purchase power is the only impact a person can really hope to make.

>>39287123
If you stick to that then it will be easy.

>>39287154
From 14 and a little, I've planned to go to 10. Had some ups and downs but especially with uni and making my own meals exlusively (nobody taking over the cooking for the night and making bullshit) I should be keeping on track

>>39287095
>he isn't British

do one lad

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>>39286522
For a big guy like you

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>>39287201
>It seems if the food is already purchased and it'll go in the bin If uneaten, eating it makes absolutely no difference to the world.
Then why does this not apply to every other meat you see in the supermarket?

If you don't eat it, they'll probably have to throw away the leftover anyway. You, as a single person, make virtually no difference to the number of animals as a whole that are going to be killed for meat.

>>39287223
oh my why did you post such a dirty slut?

>>39287217
Someone who isn't British won't have a clue what "do one" means.

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>>39287217
Well sorry I have only been studying here for 2 years?

>>39287230
Welcome to vegan logic mate. They want to think they're making a difference, when in reality there's very little impact in the greater scheme of things.

>>39287201
You forgot personal health and projecting an image of total objection to the world.
Ya fucked up, lad. Flexiterian/flexivegan are white girl memes. Just try not to do it again and continue life as a vegan.

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>>39287246

HES DIFFERENT!! GET HIM!!

>>39287230
Not really true. The supermarket keeps track of everything that is sold, and if less meat is purchased as a whole each year, there'll be less demand for meat, the meat industry will shrink or standards will have to improve. I guess that's the idea in theory. If I live with my non-vegan family though and they leave food leftover, my decision makes no difference since they'll continue purchasing those things regardless.

>>39287231
She's only a slut for the Wired. She's P U R E

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Can one forget how to drive?

I failed my test a year or so ago and haven't had the confidence to properly pursue it further.

>>39287288
>She's only a slut for the Wired
jesus
that's properly disturbing.
she's a slut for millions of people and third worlders.

>>39287246
that's ok m8, I'm sorry too

>>39287262
I guess its good to be as consistent as possible with morals but if I logically can't see how my actions affect the world I don't see the point.

>>39286980
>>39287085
good effort, shall be using it to post some tunes

>>39287303
I doubt you'll forget, you'll be incredibly rusty and stall though but I picked it back up after passing my test and then not driving for 5 years and now i'm a pretty good driver I think

>>39287275
>If I live with my non-vegan family though and they leave food leftover, my decision makes no difference since they'll continue purchasing those things regardless.
Not entirely true. By going vegan, I've convinced conversion to lacto vegetarianism in one of my family members (only struggle is to get mummy to stop munching the yoggies) and highly reduced meat consumption in the other two. Veganism has a magical way of spreading.

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>>39287303
I used to drive everyday back home but after a year in uni, I went back and nearly crashed the very first minute I got in because I accidentally stepped on the accelerator instead of the brake.

I never touch the wheel ever since.

If I treat meat the way some people would treat a cake, as in you occassionally but not regularly eat it.
What am I?

i have been masturbating too much lately lads. i have been spending like 4 hours a day masturbating because i spend hours trying to find a girl to do shit with online. i need to stop this and go back to just having a quick wank in the bath room.

>>39287258
Yea but if everyone thought like them then there would be a difference. People just get out of it by saying 'oh well if I don't do then someone else will'. Shit logic

>>39287347
Probably human.

>>39287347
A normal person with a healthy diet.

>>39287359
What do you mean you spend hours trying to find a girl online? Where are you looking?

>>39287120

I think my gran used to talk about stone.

>>39287347
Meat eater who wants a special snowflake status

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>>39287052
Listening to great gig in the sky as I saw this. What a god.

>>39286890
Where are you from Ebin?

>>39287406
east yorkshire coast

>>39287333

It's okay, I'm eating yours.

>>39287404
currently on coming back to life, great stuff very poignant

>>39287347
Meat is food everything else on the plate is trimmings for the meat.

>>39287258
>Supply and demand is vegan logic

tripfag drama has made you weak /britfeel/

>>39287374
a girl that will send me nudes or let me send her nudes. a normally just end up finding a girl who i get on with and i have a normal chat with her. one one offs i find a horny girl that will trade nudes but its rare as fuck, probs because im not a chad.

>>39287442
Give me a painless death and pass the bottle to the next anon with trip.

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>you find an old bottle in a charity shop, turns out Iittle genie fella
What are your 3 wishes?

>>39287333
True enough, hadn't really seen it this way. I guess by eating the haribo I'm creating a demand for haribo in my house which will lead to the purchase of it.

>>39287457
>make my waifu real
>make her love me unconditionally
>shadowban tripfags

>>39287457

sort my entire life out and id save the other 2 for later

>>39287451
I used to have a girl I spoke to online who had the same extreme and obscure fetish that I do, and she used to indulge me on webcam. Was brilliant. Sadly she has a boyfriend now and she isn't up for it at all. The annoying thing is that the boyfriend doesn't have the fetish and she is obviously desperate to do it with someone again but she can't.

>>39287481
>sort my entire life out
That's cheating.

>>39287442
Reverse time back to the big bang, then change the variables ever so slightly so that none of this will ever happen or happen again.

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>>39287481
>sort my entire life out
I'm sorry sir, could you be more specific?

>>39287446
Honestly, I'm of the opinion that vegetables, when seasoned and cooked properly can be just as good as meat. The main problem is that people grow up eating shitty boiled greens and think that's all they can be.

>>39287484
What was the fetish mate?

>>39287513
I'm not convinced any veggie recipe can beat tendies.

>>39287513
Can confirm that.
Just try some of the food that vegetarians eat and you'll see that it's not that bad.

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>>39287480
Granted. Who is your waifu?

>>39287500
>>39287510
>sleeping pattern
>whatever is wrong with my teeth and gums(too scared of dentists to go)
>whatever keeps sending me into dizzy and lightdead spells(too scared of doctors to go)
>make me less autistic and able to talk to people
>make me good enough at something to have an enjoyable hobby besides 4chan and driving around on google street view
>make everyone forget about all the autistic and stupid and embarrassing things ive done in the past
>alot more that i cant be bothered thinking of now

These all count as the first wish, i have 2 more after this

>>39287444
It's not my typical night music but it's a rule of mine to listen to DSOTM on the rare occasion I feel happy.

I'm watching Practical Jokers, does this make me a normie for having shit taste?

>>39287522
Sissy crossdressing. As you can imagine it's incredibly hard to find a woman who is into that without having to pay them.

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>>39287534
This robot here

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1st run after a couple of hours learning how to do it

>>39287513
Vegetables are what my food eats, before it suffers for my pleasure.

>>39287523
Linda McCartney Mozzarella Burgers. Not the vegan one.

Pretty good m8

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>>39287544
Genie is gonna bankrupt before he can grant any more wishes.

>>39287457
never trust a genie, that's what ive learnt from the horror stories.

>>39287556
Jesus Christ, yes, it's close to impossible to find a woman who's actually into girly guys.
I'd be straight as a razor if I could find them easily desu.

>>39287568
Possibly sandwiched between two steskburgers!

>>39287484
yeah, i have had girls like this years back, and it was decent. used to speak to this indian girl that i would do shit with on skype. think this never happens now because i either get ghosted by the girl for whatever reason or i dont speak to them enough because i get bored. dont know if its harder now because horny girls will just go on tinder, 5 years ago dating apps and shit like that was not as big.

you know what it might actually be. when i was young, i would speak to younger girls and they are usually easier and more up for sending nudes and shit. often its only girls who are 18 that will do shit with me now.

>>39287523
Olives are the greatest food of all time

>>39287596

I'd say venison or veal.

>>39287596
if you like eating perfume.

>>39287584
Yep. She was a 3/10 with a strong Newcastle accent but I didn't give a shit.

>>39287608
Bet you dislike parma violets as well lad, shame.
>>39287606
Ashamed to say I've never had either if these lad.

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>>39287544
Cant grant all that at once. How about you wish for perfect physical and mental health?
>>39287557
Enjoy anon. I cant help you explain to the neighbours why you have a robot gf though
>>39287577
Just wish carefully anon

>>39287568
M8, the LMcC vegan burgers and bangers are the shit.

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Does any of you actually go to tourist attractions and shit?

My parents are visiting in a week and they want to bring me to Madame Tussauds in London and maybe some other places but it looks boring af.

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>>39287556
One day I'll tell my gf about this fetish, don't know how it'll go down...

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amazing lucid dreams lately tbqh
this morning had a girl spit in my mouth then pissed in it
came like you wouldn't believe

>>39287638
Im actually not sure about perfect physical health...w..wouldnt i end up looking like chad? i dont want big muscles and things like that, i like being skel

>>39287627
Had both before. Venison was stodgy and horrible, with a strong gamey flavour (meaning it tastes a bit how a fresh cow shit smells). Veal on the otherhand is like flavourless, tender beef; severe suffering on the part of an animal to produce a block of nonvegan firm tofu soaked in fat.

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>>39287668
fuck Tussauds do
tate modern
tower of london
brick lane
welcome collection
done

>>39287668
If they still have the Star Wars exhibition, it's actually pretty good!

Go with your parents lad, spend some quality time with them.

>>39287670
I've told three girls about it. None of them were actually into it. Two of them were up for participating to please me. One of them just totally wasn't into it at all, but she didn't think any less of me for it.

I'd say go for it.

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>>39287673
>lucid dream like twice a week
>everytime i try to do something lewd i wake up immediately
>tfw getting blueballed in my own dreams
It's not fucking fair. I can stay lucid much longer if I hop onto the first cock I see.

>>39287622
I lived with a bi girl who was totally into crosdressing guys and she was really into guys who look the way I do, but holy shit we could not get along beyond being friends because she was the kind of ironic tumblr user who talks about feminism and shit. In hindsight I should have just asked her if she wants to have a no-strings attached FWB relationship, we were always getting drunk together anyway and she was always complaining that she couldn't just have that sort of relationship with some guys. Would have been pretty good desu.

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>>39287679
Nothing to worry about sir, you can keep your current body just without the ailments that plague you.

>>39287668

Depends lad, the Collouseum? Ephesus? The Winter Palace? Versailles? Certainly.

Tusauds? Euro Disney? Alton Towers? Not in this life or the next.

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>>39287709
lucid orgasms are amazing lad, they're multiple to me now and i rarely even cum the bed just wake up to lightheaded afterglow

if a drug could do this on command id be fucked

why are slices of roast chicken from the supermarket always wet? they always have a layer of wetness on them

>>39287756
It's spit from the staff

>>39287723
i feel like my problem with women is that i have a feminine look going on. it worked when i was younger because girls were then into cute guys, now most are not into it. nothing i can do either, im not even skinny, i just have a feminine face.

What if you've lost all hope,
would you feel if you've lost all hope?
If you've lost all hope?

Watereyes...
watereyes......


You mean the world to me lads.

>>39287756
halal techniques, inject water to bulk them up

>>39287756
They probably add water to it or something to stop it drying out when its packaged.

>>39287723
I know what you mean, I broke up with someone because of that once. She had the attitude that women have it so much worse than men and men aren't allowed to have problems.

>>39287683

Kek. Bait harder lettuce faggot.

>>39287756
the staff spit on them for a laugh

>>39287584
Funnily enough my gf has been begging me to do this off and on again. Never give in though, sounds awful to me and I don't think our relationship would be the same again. Same goes for pegging and prostate stuff.

>>39287797
I know what you mean mate. Although it is my fetish, I am still quite glad my current gf isn't into it. I also like being manly and in charge, and I suppose you can't be both.

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>tfw you wish for power and the dickhead genie makes you Hitler in 1945

>>39287770
That's what she was really into though, girly boys. She was basically lesbian but into femboys and shit as well. Her tastes in guys was basically one in a million though, literally never found anyone else who was into that stuff.

>>39287785
Yeah, she had the whole dyed hair and everything; would often drone on about rape culture and everything. Thankfully she was pretty chill and would stop giving us the long rants when we stopped her halfway through because we'd heard them a thousand times.

>>39287797
To some a blessing, to others a curse. Nothing new there.

>>39287825
i would try to escape. he could of potentially escaped, i think if he left earlier

>>39287825
CLASSIC genie scam that
gotta watch those guys

>>39287781
>>39287774
Puts me off eating it, I have to squeeze it in kitchen roll to get all the moist off before eating it

>>39287764
>>39287791
the pre-packaged stuff is the same

>>39287833
a few girls are into cute guys but i dont know about guys who will literally cross dress. sounds like girls into cross dressing guys are very rare.

>>39287841
There were about 10 people who wanted to try to take over and broker peace. If he tried to escape, or tried to broker peace himself, or do anything to preserve himself, he'd have gotten a bullet in the head from someone around him who wanted to take over.

>>39287825
>tfw you wish for fame and the dickhead genie makes you Bill Cosby

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>>39287825
>tfw you gain immortality but end up getting sentenced to life behind bars

>>39287861
well guess who's working in the factory?

>>39287724
In that case sir id like my mental,and especially physical health sorted, a few million in my bank account over night and is it possible to have everyone on my shitlist killed? or are they only worth 1 wish each?

>>39287787
Just telling you true. Those are shit tier meats. While I object to all meat, lamb, chicken, and good cuts of adult beef are all vastly superior to these poncy slabs of flesh.
Get some taste, faggot.

>>39287861

Buy halal or kosher.

>>39287870
The guy in that episode was a retard. He had immortality for about a week and was somehow already bored.

>>39287865
>he'd have gotten a bullet in the head from someone around him who wanted to take over.

so there is no way he could have went into hiding like some conspiracy thoeries make out? i would be buggered then wouldent i laddy

>>39287906

Piffle. The lack of nutrients in your grass hut mud man diet has left you retarded.

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>>39287886
Money is no problem sir. I suppose if you had a physical list I could see they were all killed. Do you wish to specify a cause of death?

best meat I've had has been the burnt side of flank steak desu. im a simple man

>>39287923

Nah. None of the "big" Nazis got out of Berlin. Few of any stature.

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>>39287562
ezzzz teehee~

>>39287861
>the pre-packaged stuff is the same

you do realise that they open it up and all spit in it and they have contacts in the factory who spit on it too. marx wrote a book on it.

>>39287923
I can't think of a way out for him. No one around him had anything to gain by helping him to escape.

>>39287957

Good day to day eating.

>>39287919
That's Normies for you
ree

>>39287864
Yeah, they're very rare, but gays who are into crossdressing femboys are a dime a dozen, so it's not terrible. I just wish I could just get a girl who was into the same kind of stuff as me.

>>39286235
How old are you my dude?

Totes original

>>39287923
He was one of the most recognisable men on the planet and surrounded by enemies. And like the other anon said there were people in the party who would have gladly killed him off if need be.

>>39287995

Find a rich one with a conservative (small c) daddy who she wants to piss off.

Buy a case of redbull and one of tuna.

>>39287947
The cause of death doesnt matter to me but it would be nice if the last thought they had, or the last thing they were told is that i had a hand in their death in some way

anyone got a spare you for me there?

>>39288032
W-Where is that going Anon? I don't get it.

>>39288049
I'll witness you Anon.

Got a work lunch with the boss and a few directors tommorrow. I'm a decade or two apart from everyone else age wise and haven't been able to connect with anyone. How the fuck do I make it bearable?

>>39288068

It's a work lunch, not a daisy chain.

What are some comfy things to listen to when trying to sleep?

Need some ideas, the rain and thunderstorms on YouTube don't do it for me anymore.

>>39288021
Shave the head, shave the stache and he'd blend in. Adolf could have made it

>>39288110

Shit audiobooks does it for me.

>tfwi ebin does not know that the staff spit on the food

how does he not know about the marx books?

>>39288116

Impossible to to say but the facts of what happened with other senior party folk would suggest it's unlikely he'd have escaped.

>>39288110
The old ricky gervais xfm radio recordings

>>39288160
He's trying to sleep not die of laughter anon

>>39288110
I really like some lo-fi for lazy days in the summer just napping during the day.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hdmSovWFhig
Also there's a lot of these sort of lo-fi type mixes on YouTube, they call it Simpsonwave, but fuck knows what that's about.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJngStpPzYU

Just tried the chocolate hazelnut Krave after weeks of having the milk chocolate Krave. Should have made the change a long time ago.

>>39288181
>ricky gervais
>laughter

Not two terms I often see together.

>>39287976
Well done laddy! What cube are you using?

>>39288243
A Moyu Aolong v2. Came in post earlier today.

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>finish AC: Black Flag
>credits rolling for 20 mins and still going
>can't skip them
let me go back to the game reeeeeeeeee

>>39288230
Merchant and Pilkington were both far funnier I know. Those podcasts are quality though, as is The Office and Extras. Everything else they've done is meh

>tfw used to solve Rubik's cubes every day as a kid in secondary school for over a year but I've forgotten now
I used to do it whilst walking and shit, I was able to do it in about 30seconds consistently, it was pretty good for getting me through boring classes desu.

>>39286150
How do all these pakis afford to live in London?
They obviously don't own any property, they do shitty jobs with shitty pay and have like 3-5 children, how the fuck do they afford that shit?
An average brit cannot afford to live in London yet all these brownies can?
Are they just amazing at budgeting?

>>39288292
A traditional British skill anon.
Cockneys have always been adept at doing a lot with a little.

>>39288292
Shit tons of bennies, lying about their situation and living in a two bed house with 15 other pakis without telling the landlord.

>>39288292
Mate there's tons of shit areas in London full of poor people.

>>39288288
people must have thought you were a genius laddy

>>39288261
That was quick Mayuri

>>39288358
I got a lot of people who tried to jumble it in such a way that it was 'unsolvable' and would often ask to jumble it and have me solve it. Was pretty odd sometimes, but it was also an alright talking piece I guess.

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Did 31 today. That 31st one was the most difficult one I've ever done, I really really had to try for it. I didn't go as low as normal on that one but I'm counting it anyway

It looks like I've missed a day but I really haven't because I did an all-nighter and so one of my days has 'vanished' from my life. I do the pushups when I wake up, and I've done them when I wake up 5 times in a row now, even if my sleep schedule doesn't fit into the discrete 24-hour blocks everyone else uses

Post 'shups

>>39288256
Nice, when did you order that? I remember shipanon recommending someone get that cube what feels like just yesterday

>>39288292
You'd be surprised at how often Pakis have money. A lot of them do own property, after buying houses and business units in East London when they were cheap and making a fortune from them.

They also tend to own their own small business, and if you do that right it's a serious money maker, better than most jobs.

>>39288429
I ordered it after he recommended it at like midnight or something. I don't know how, but it came around midday today... Got it from ebay. Quickest delivery I've ever seen

>>39288406
H-hi...didn't even realise how far I was because it said 51% but I think that's overall completion, not just storyline. Also it was shit, it just ended out of nowhere, so much worse than the AC2 storyline that I remember.

What have you been up to lad?

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>>39288415
Did 30 today to make up for how lazy I've been. Lose track of days because of my sleep pattern as well. You NEET?

>>39288465
Oh, from what I remember it wrapped up fairly okay although you could tell the process was expedited at one point so they could rush you through
I've not been up to much, did some photoshops and tried to sleep yet I can't. Nervous for going to the bank again tomorrow.

What would you say your favourite AC game is? I think the first, maybe it's nostalgia but I did genuinely really enjoy it, besides the really frustrating moments that plagued it of course

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Got some nice Ephemeral Rift lads to end the evening nicely.

Anyone else listening too some good asmr stuff?

i wonder if girls ever talk about how they played with barbies when they were kids. i think talking about what you did as a kid is comfy

>>39288277
Season 1 and 2 were the best. 4 was the weakest as Karl didnt have much effort left in it and they went way too harsh on him.

>>39288567
I'm sure they do, why wouldnt they?

I've not been this drunk in a while.

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>>39288558
Haven't actually played that many, only 2 and 3 and snippets of 1. Has to be AC2 from those, didn't know what was going on half the time but I loved it

I liked those 80s photoshops lad, will be using them in the future

Post tunes: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=srvRvN5wxh4

>>39288638
Looks like you can still type coherent sentences lad!

>>39288637
just seems shit compared to cool stuff like transformers

>>39288564
Very relaxing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JyTTO6JNmjQ

AGE OF EMPIRES 4 LADS WOOOOOO

>>39288261
>mfw I have Black Flag but haven't gotten around to completing it yet.

>>39288660
3 was pretty decent although the one before it, brotherhood I think - was better

Thanks though lad, they felt pretty amateur or more so than usual but it's whatever I guess

Feeling in the mood for some chill tunes at the moment
https://soundcloud.com/kuplasound/still-breathing

>>39288700
>No ASMR of the sound of her inserting it
Fucking pointless desu.

>>39288564
Which video lad? I used to watch his beer videos all the time. One of the only asmr people I could stand. Can't stand that tapping shit.

>tfw i went for a kip at 2pm and ignored my alarm
>tfw i just WOKE UP FUCKING NOW
>tfw have a dentist appointment to have all my wisdom teeth removed at 1pm which is when ill be ready for bed again.

Seriously just fucking kill me and bin the knife afterwards.

>>39288522
Yep, NEET. Who were you on the spreadsheet again btw?

A-are the b& gone yet?

>>39288743
Get stoned and have a few glasses of wine.

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>>39288776
I'm tv guy.

>>39288739
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lEmYyK4QdFI

I get ya lad he has some unique content which I love about him. Shame he stopped the beers videos but fair enough if he wanted to stay healthy.

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>everyone finally going to bed
>can her an argument starting

Perfect time tbqh

>>39288729
I'd been meaning to buy a bundle of the AC games and play through them all again but I'd like to get a job before I get wasteful with money.

Nice chill tune lad, I've been listening to this mix >>39288200. Hopefully going to have an early night

>>39288789
He's just had 12 hours of sleep, doubt he can fall asleep even if he gets drunk and high

>tfw when i used to go to my nans every christmas and she used to always buy me action man toys. i remember i would always get another figure that was like action man, i cant remember what it was called

>>39288200
Steezyasfuck is a good channel for lo fi mixes

Can anyone help me out? When I create a graph of the spreadsheet in a line chart it's got the dates along the X axis, but when I make it a scatter chart (which I think looks neater) it switches to numbers instead of the date like in >>39288415

What do?

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Haven't felt this comfy in a while lads, feels good.

How's everyone else this fine late evening?

>>39288841
I think he could get another few hours in if he's lucky enough to have a really strong indica in the house.

>>39288912
Doing alright. Got a codiene buzz and watching Twilight Zone.

>>39288819
Sounds comfy tbqh. The only lofi mix I ahve on hand is
https://youtu.be/rlVx2Byjjh8
I quite like lofi house and hiphop personally. Tommapbeats is a pretty decent artist for that sort of thing too
https://youtu.be/76PHzENMQ04

Good luck with your sleep though lad. I need to be up in 11 hours so there's still hope but I'll probably end up asleep at 5 again.

Lads I've been awake for 40 hours and can't sleep, what is wrong with me?

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>>39288912

Feel like complete shit

Get ignored constantly

Work is a fucking joke

Sick to death of sitting in this room


Just the usual tbqfh

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>>39288888
Dunno, I didn't have a problem with it.
Scatter is fucking terrible for it though in my opinion.

>>39288985
Some kind of mental illness?

>>39288991
>Get ignored constantly
Here's a (you) then

>>39289031
Not been diagnosed with anything, I have some trouble getting to sleep sometimes but not this bad.

>>39288985
>>39289054

Turn everything off and get into bed

You will be asleep in 10 minutes

>>39288957
Sweet man, what episode you watching?

>>39288991
Wanna talk or something lad?

>>39289017
Here's a copy of the spreadsheet anyway.
puu
sh/xiQQz.xlsx

girl i have been talking to all day has decided to ignore my last reply. i hope she fell asleep or something because women normally do this when they ghost me

I am the haggis. Mr. Haggis.

>>39289081
>what episode you watching?
I'm trying to watch them all. Currently on episode 40 A Thing About Machines

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You DO read ebins blog right? Xd

>>39286290
i feel that. what is the point. for me i've a debt to pay off before i can go.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=l6QCPuJRS-4
i know it's not the same as yours but it gives me feels

>>39289324
What's the link?

Orginao vegetanio

>>39287940
>Nutrients
>More abundant in meat
Bloody hell, you've not even done pre-GCSE biology

>>39289017
I've got the dates aong the top and the names along the side, would that make a difference?

What kind of graph is most suitable for it in your opinion?

Can some anon with experience tell me about getting somewhere to live when you're on the dole? Like i need my own place and was wondering typically what kind of place i could get to live when unemployed.

>>39289324
Left or right lads? Has to be right for me
>nigerian-japanese
muh diiiiiiick

>>39289489
council flat lad.

>>39289509
Would absolutely destroy right.

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>>39287670
Hoooot. You don't wear makeup and wigs, though, right? That enters the uncanny valley.

>>39289523
Through housing benefit? Also how is the council flat paid for when i'm on dole and have fuck all money?

>>39289489
Room in a shared flat unless you are over 35.

>>39288974
>having crush on you
You trying to send me a message lad? hehe
I should really close AC and just get into bed but I don't see it happening.

Can anyone help me with identifying what song this was samled from? At about 4 mins in, it feels really familiar but I can't put my finger on it
https://soundcloud.com/vice-tapes/smeyeul-morning-routine

>>39288110
I listen to video game music. This is my saving grace: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aK4JSwhdcdE

In between songs it's ambiance.

>>39289509
Right obviously lad

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>>39289489


Know a few people who do this

Its a points system if i remember correctly

The more points you have the quicker you will get a place bascially

Things like having kids or having special needs bumps you up the list

>>39289555
im pretty sure they pay some of the rent and stuff through housing benefit

>>39288261
I didn't like Assassin's Creed 2 or... Revelations, or something... I've played two and got at least halfway through them but stopped because I didn't think it was worth it.

>>39287670
if you want to keep your gf, don't tell her