Thread replies: 8
Thread images: 2
Thread images: 2
File: 883255_original.png (72KB, 492x225px) Image search:
[Google]
72KB, 492x225px
1
hey, so i wanna tell you guys the story of my degeneration.
>be me, 21. six months ago
>officer in the army (not the USA)
>am gay
>moved out of my folks to live on my own in the big city (am from a small town)
>get a shitty salary as an officer
>parents give me extra money to get by
>im beautiful but have body issues (used to be fat when i was 16, lost weight but still have this constant thought that im still obese)
>start going out to clubs
>have so much fun, have sex like 5 times a night in the bathrooms, dance my ass off, go home
>up to this time just smoke weed (a big no-no in the army obviously)
>even though i have fun in clubs im still really lonely and have no actual friends to just hang out with
>start drinking on my own
>stop eating (used to not eat for 4 days, then have a big meal, then not eat for another 4 days)
>lose 12 kg in 2 months
>am borderline anorexic
>stop visiting parents
>parents eventually see me
>i look like a skeleton
>mom breaks down (she has a lot on her plate with my dad and brother and grandma [they considered me theyre only good achievement cuz i was gifted and love reading and really kinda intelligent])
>dad doesnt know what to do
at this point its just club sex, weed daily, alcohol and no food
>they all give me an intervention
>i promise to change
>am willing to change and start eating and working out and living a bit healthier (i smoke cigarettes)
>start trying to make an effort
>become miserable in the army
>start going to heavier clubs (not the usual edm ones, but hardcore techno parties)
>dont tell any of this to parents
>start doing speed
>start doing MDMA
>proceed to cocaine
>proceed to ketamine
>proceed to gina
>proceed to MD coated with meth
this was a prolonged process, not all of them came in one time
>be 3 weeks ago
>resigned from the army
>be last weekend
>been partying for 4 straight days (still waiting to be released from the army)
>took all of the above in those 4 days and a lot of them
>been depressed ever since
>>
>gay man walks a path of self destruction
gee riveting tale OP
>>
2
>deal with equipment in the army
>am in charge of A LOT of equipment
>i think some is lost
>i may go into prison for a long time
>scared
and another instance that happened that made me almost insane:
>be a month and a half ago
>on sick leave
>arrested for possession of narcotics (just weed, hash and oils)
>they find out im a soldier
>by law they have to tell the MP
>released after 5 hours, not told anything
>dont sleep for 2 days
>take a lawyer
>dont actually have any money becuase of the drugs and bills and rent so have to take a lown
>now im seriously broke
fuck guys, i dont know if you can really tell how crazy all this shit was, like all of this happened in 6 months.
im seriously down, sad and depressed and having some bad thoughts..
but thanks for the read!
>>
Yeah dude, that sounds really sucky. But you don't have control over the past. Only what you can do now.
Since a lot of your worries are financial, are you able to get a job? You can even get one online if anxiety is bothering you. Transcription, writing, chat support, call centers, etc.
You should focus on what you do have and think about why you should be grateful for it. Don't focus so much on negative energy in the past.
>>
File: varg-vikernes.jpg (114KB, 762x464px) Image search:
[Google]
114KB, 762x464px
Speaking as someone who has been through similar experiences, you need to get a grip on your self worth, it's the only way you will gain enough self respect for yourself to stop putting dicks and drugs into your body. You need to love yourself, if you don't love yourself you need to be very introspective and autistic about yourself and your situation and pinpoint exactly what about you and your life that you don't like then incrementally work on changing it.
I'm not perfect myself but I'm in a much, much better position than I used to be.
>>
All the faggots and traps are sick and insane, you all should be locked
>>
As a fellow homosexual, fuck you OP. You're a degenerate and the exact reason why breeders think we're disgusting - and apparently we overwhelmingly are. Jesus Christ, get your shit together or kill yourself.
>>
>>39254073
He is trying. He already realizes his mistakes, and in fact unhealthily fixates on them. He can enter the healing stage now if he allows himself to move past the fixation stage, but you aren't helping.
Thread posts: 8
Thread images: 2
Thread images: 2