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I have a story for you robots >trying to get my life together

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Thread replies: 46
Thread images: 8

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I have a story for you robots
>trying to get my life together
>looking for a job
>find a movie theatre close to my apartment
>Go in for an interview
>of course im a nervous aspie
>sit there staring at the ground
>interviewer comes out
>shes qt
>she asks me the routine questions
>somehow get through with minimal ravioli
>go into the big interview with the president
>sit in his big scary office
>signed posters from actors on the wall
>promotional art
actual life sized statues of Alvin and the Chipmunks
>"take a seat anon"
>this guy fucking grills me relentlessly
>"i couldnt help but noticed you dont smile very often, I mean when I walked out to get you, you seemed bothered that I was even speaking to you.
>im freaking out inside, is it that obvious that i want to kill myself?
>profusely apologize.
>"o-oh im sorry, i didnt get a lot of sleep last night."
>he leans back and smiles slightly, he is completely aware that im just trying to damage control.
>no wonder this guy is the boss.
>more interview stuff
>shakes my hand
>i leave
>while im walking out the front door, two women who already work there confront me.
>"so did ya get the job?" They both say
>i cant believe more human beings are talking to me.
>I remember what the boss told me about not smiling and generally looking like I dont want to be talked to.
>Maybe this is why no one talked to me all through highschool, i thought. Maybe this is why Im always alone.
>I muster what I think was a smile
>"hehe, yeah hopefully!" i said between seizures.
>Their faces seemed to light up
>Run out the door, before I fuck this up.
(Cont.)
>>
>>39135408
you take too long writing, i'm waiting
>>
>>39135408
Hurry up nigger
You have been muted for 2 seconds, because your comment was not original.
>>
>>39135408
im waiting too anon
>>
Fuckin post already faggot.
>>
>>39135408
>doesn't write everything at once and post it all at a similar time
>>
>>39135408
Anon you can't leave us hanging you fuck
>>
>op
>write green text
>lots of anons interested in story
>write cont.
>doesnt post
wtf anon? Why?
>>
>>39135924
That's 4D humor you pleb
>>
>>39135991
>Anon
>Green text some other anons greentext
>Gets called pleb
>>
>>39135609
sorry
>>39135671
pardon me
>>39135678
coming through
>>39135408
>Sitting in my car
>contemplating what just happened
>one of my major fatal flaws have just been brought to the surface
>realize how people see me
>have a mini existential crisis in a trader joes parking lot.
>Realize i need to seriously change, that I cant let the demons inside me control how i appear anymore.
>a catering truck drives by
>suddenly start daydreaming about being a delivery driver and delivering food to places every night.
>Realize that when someone asks me what I do, I can literally say "I drive."
>decide to abandon all this movie theatre stuff.
>Go to a nearby deli, with strength in my resolve i confidently approach the counter with a smile.
>"welcome to Anons Deli, would you like to tr-."
>ID LIKE TO DRIVE YOUR CATERING VEHICLE.
>"...youre going to have to apply online."
>oh ok...
And thats what im doing right now. I feel bad that you guys were expecting a huge final act but im literally just calling restaurants as we speak.
>>
>>39136188
Oh well, good luck anon, I hope you find a fulfilling job
>>
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>>39136188
hope you get the job anon, delivery sounds pretty comfy - people don't really pay attention much to the driver.

ill be going for my first ever walk-in application at a relatively close discount store this weekend, that is if i dont chicken out. hopefully they don't see through me either, i really could use the job...
>tfw specifically aiming for the overnight shift as a stocker so i have to confront no one during the day
>>
>>39136188
you have a big dream GO FOR IT don't let anybody to stop you of being the catering delivery
you are meant for big things
>>
No firm handshakes? Applying online? Wow.
>>
>>39135408
Lmao, this reminds me of a guy that would come into my work relentlessly trying to apply. I just realized he was probably from this site. Disclaimer: I'm a robot who's able to blend in with normies.

>He was a member at our gym
>Young guy probably just out of highschool, acne all over his face
>Always saw him coming in, scanning his pass without saying anything, then disappearing
>One day he asks if we're hiring
>We were (24 hr gyms typically need night staffing btw and it's the easiest job you'll ever have)
>He fills out the application after his workout, sweats all over my desk
>I take it and hand it to the front desk girl, joke with her that we're going to hire him so she can have more time to talk with him
>He comes in the the next day asking if they hired anyone yet, then the next day asking to speak with the manager (probably wanted to give him a firm handshake)
>Mind you, he always does this in his gross workout clothes or after a workout when he's all nasty, hair always a mess, like he can't be fucked to come in on his own time looking presentable
>He even calls sometimes, in retrospect his boomer dad was probably really pushing him to bug us about the job
>Little does he know this actually pisses us off after the first or second time and we don't want to hire him now
>He becomes a meme between me and a couple of the front desk girls (along with this other kid Michael who got beat up in the gym and cried to us saying his dad would sue the gym)
>Every time he checks in I watch the front desk girl from my desk as she smirks, then call her from the interoffice phone
>"So did you ask him out yet?"
>"Haha shut up! Omg he smelled so bad!"
>Stuff like that
>Eventually he gets hired after a week due to literally no one else applying (protip: the job market is like this everywhere where there isn't a shit ton of Mexicans)
>He works for like 3 days and quits

Alex if you're here, sup. Jasmine still wants your dick bro.
>>
>>39136542
>I'm a robot who's able to blend in with normies.
Not a robot then, got ya
>>
>>39136822
It's an interesting dynamic. I'm socially inclined enough to get jobs and have short friendships but everyone in the workplace eventually ends up picking on me or ignoring me.
>>
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>>39136860

You do realize you just made a green text about how you bullied and gossiped about a young guy just wanting to get a job. People probably end up picking on you because you are a estrogen venting meek rat.

You sound like you try way to hard to fit in. Just remember all your co-workers likely talk about you the same way behind your back boyo.
>>
>>39136542
you sound like an immense faggot
>>
>>39135408
i hope they call you anon. that would be a blast for you.
>>
>>39136542
Damn, you sound insufferable.
No wonder people don't like you once they know you.
>>
>>39136188
I kekd slightly. Good luck man.
>>
>>39136975
>>39137615
>>39138515
Angry omegas hating on a delta. They dislike me because I won't go out and drink with them and laugh when their dumb asses talk about sports on TV like it matters.
>>
>>39139237
My thoughts exactly. Anyone who reacted badly to that story definitely identified with the acne-ridden greaseball too much.

I do still think you're kind of a faggot though. I bet you orbit Desk Girl and post gay shit on social media.
>>
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How do people get jobs after leaving HS?
I'll be done with that shit in a few months and I feel like I'll probably starve to death when the time comes.
>>
>>39140110
>a few months
>its August
are you in 'straya or something? unless you were held back a year you better get off my board
>>
>>39135408
Anon, let me tell you about the worst interview I ever had.
>Go in, really nervous
>Interview was for an easy-mode office job
>Three people sitting at the table, two guys in suits, and their boss, who was a 9/10 mild
>Interview is slow at first, but by the end of it, it was super casual and everyone was having a good time
>Getting a lot of signs that I may have the job
>They tell me that they are looking forward to seeing me again and that o should remain optimistic
>As I leave, I shake their hands
>Suddenly freak out when I shake her though, scream "Whoaaaaah!"
>Realize that she has some sort of deformity with her right hand. She had like a chicken foot for a hand
>Everyone in the room goes dead silent and she gets visibly mad.
>>
>>39140159
It ends in November where I live, and yes I had to repeat the first year because I fucked up and my grades went to the shitter.
>>
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>>39139237
>They dislike me because I won't go out and drink with them and laugh when their dumb asses talk about sports on TV like it matters.
>Disclaimer: I'm a robot who's able to blend in with normies.

So you're blessed of avoiding the cure of being of robot, yet you squander that by making fun of your normie friends, making you not a normie either.

Failed or attempting normies are at the bottom because they have no personality and attempting to suckle up to the normie lifestyle at the detriment of their own individual intuition and personality quirks. They try to rectify this by putting other normies and robots down to make them seem better in comparison. You're the biggest faggot of this story
>>
>>39140653
*curse

You have been muted for 2 seconds, because your comment was not original.
>>
>>39140110
If you're an average white guy without a huge social circle you're gonna have a harder time. Women get hired easily because the managers want a chance at fucking them. Turdskins get hired easily because they have a sense of comradery so they'll hire one another to work for whatever field they're in. There's no nepotism or comradery among young white men anymore, that's our biggest problem today.

You're going to have to do stuff other people don't want to do. Night shift jobs are what got me out of my NEET rut. Normies can't seem to stay up past 2am without alcohol or drugs in their system, and working weekends interferes with their social life which is the most important thing to them.
>>
>>39140317
Dude you blew it. You could've easily played that off as a joke by saying something like:

>Haha, just kidding, I noticed you had a chicken hand earlier. See, I have a great attention to detail. You know, I had a chicken once. Have you ever had a chicken, Ms. Chicken Hand?

Then leave the room flapping your arms and saying BOK BOK BAGOK. You would have turned an awkward moment into an opportunity to make a joke and show them you're funny.
>>
>>39140653
No, I just wave in and out of socializing when I feel like it because sometimes it's beneficial to me. I certainly did orbit those front desk girls and had a 10/10 instagram model (8/10 in my book because I don't like fitness sluts who tan) crushing on me. But alas, I screwed up by not moving things further than acquaintanceship in time. One day she just randomly quit. But if I wasn't in with the normies I would've never had a chance. I wouldn't be in the circle making jokes for her to know I'm funny, she would have only seen me as "that quiet guy no one really talk to." If I never made any attempts I wouldn't have gotten laid fucking 8 times. Do you have 8 pussies to your name, Mr too cool to try?
>>
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>>39139237

Yeah anon, fuck them right! You a man of real taste and exquisite etiquette.

If only they could all see it!
>>
>>39141098
Damn, you're so insecure.
Bee yourself!
>>
>>39141535
>>39141600
Rude. I'm not helping you losers anymore.
>>
>>39141098
No one cares if you exhibit introverted behavior or if you got a girl crushing on you, while having 8 different women having sex with you( as if that fucking matters). You fucking made fun of some poor guy who made an attempt to get a job, you knew nothing about the dude other than
>haha he smelled bad and looked funny
In order to get some puss puss. How fucking low do you have to go to get something that is in abundance?

Jesus Christ what is happening to this board
>>
>>39141619
Great! Now fuck off bitter ass retard.
>>
>>39141619
lmao u help so much tank u
>>
>>39136188
Kitchen work is not bad where I am at

>if you can stand on 2 feet and have 2 hands you are hired where I am at
>we will train you up if you have a work ethic
>we won't be too hard on you for making mistakes. You will need to learn from them
>eat for free while working. Free drinks if you are 21+

>>39140826
>There's no nepotism or comradery among young white men anymore, that's our biggest problem today.

Bullshit. Our last 4 hires all knew each other. I got in via a referral from a friend. Outside of management we have only had 1 outside hire last longer than 4 months.
>>
Protip
Don't actually try to overcome your autism when you're talking to people, it will only make you even more nervous and insecure when you think about it.

You have to pretend. You have to act like an actor. Public life is one big acting and people always pretend being something they aren't. Pretend you aren't an aspie. When you talk people don't think about anything else except how you can trick them into believing you're a normal, healthy, sociable person.

Lie. Lie without showing any sign of remorse.
>>
>>39136188
>watches drive
>real human meme
Fucks sake anon.
>>
>>39141098
>does normie shit, calls himself a robot

Fuck off, you fucking prick
>>
>>39141647
>as if that fucking matters
Oh it matters.

I didn't make fun of the way he looked or smelled, not once did I do that irl. He was ANNOYING, that is an action which he can control, not something out of his control. I made fun of his actions and mannerisms, which were indeed funny. I think even the bitchiest Stacy would think it "mean" to make fun of someone simply because of how they looked (I don't think she actually made fun of him for smelling). No one laughs at someone calling someone else "pizzaface" anymore, you have to be better at humor than that. Sad that you don't understand, autist.
>>
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>>39136542
The idea that at any given moment most normies are laughing at you behind your back like this is why I avoid normies.
Thread posts: 46
Thread images: 8


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