Self improvement general

my self improvement plan has been working perfectly.

Hey fags, I figure a lot of you are trying to find love or at least get laid, so I wrote this out. I hope it helps at least some of you. I'm 32 years old so Ive been around long enough to know some shit.

I wrote 7 general tips for getting with women. I'm not a PUA or anything like that, just a guy who's seen some shit. I'll have to multi-post because it's fairly long.

If you want some real advice that isn't going to just be be confident be yourself be this, be that, etc. I'll give you some advice, as an ugly guy who is mostly awkward and mostly unfunny, from my successes in life regarding this very situation:

As a warning, what I'm about to say will fly in the face of most advice you're likely to receive, it may be cynical, pessimistic, even offensive. But by god, it worked for me.

1) Alcohol. Whether you're meeting a girl for a first date, or about to talk to a girl for the first time, be at least a 3 on the drunk scale, preferably even 5 or so. You want to be as drunk as possible while still being able to speak and move coherently. Basically you want to internally feel quite drunk, while outwardly still being serveable to a bartender or whatever. Alcohol makes you wittier, more relaxed, and thus more confident (or at least, not awkward). At a 3-5 on the drunk scale, you're likely experiencing the very reason why people drink alcohol in the first place.

2) Actively try to be funny. Odds are you're not a naturally funny person, like most of us. This means that, if you feel like the girl you're interested in is not laughing very much, she's probably either bored, or not finding you attractive. Laughter is a very unifying force between people, and between people of opposite sexes, it can be an attracting force. While she's telling you something, try to sort of stay in a humor mode: if she says something that's asking for a joke to be made, make one. Or really any time you feel like a joke would work in response to what she said.

cont...

3) Find common ground as quickly as possible. If you're at a party, ask who she knows at the party. If you're at an event for some activity, ask about the activity. Odds are you're both interested in it. The most important thing in a relationship is, IMO, find a common interest as soon as possible. This will always provide a sort of "safety net" for you if you find yourself at a lull in conversation with the girl, for example. The way I met my most serious girlfriend was me sending her a message noting that she was a huge fan of the same video game that I was. That game provided the entire structure of the beginning of our relationship, basically.

4) Ask the girl questions about herself. Remember FORD (family, occupation, recreation, dreams), but you want a slightly different version for the opposite sex. Women love talking about themselves, you want to let them do that. But if you become a passive sponge for women to just ramble at, you could probably be anyone. Some people just want a passive audience to talk to about whatever. Hyper-extroverts, I guess. Try to keep this from happening. You want the girl to always have you in mind, even when she's talking about herself. You want to stand out in her mind, compared to the many other men who are probably trying to get her attention. Remember that we are animals, and while men and women are both sexual beings, their sexual rituals are quite different. Mainly, men just want to fuck a girl who's physically attractive. But women know they're desirable to most men who see them, assuming they're at least average-looking. Because of this, they have to be very picky. This is just their biology. Men can squirt semen all over the place, multiple times a day, but women have a finite number of eggs, and only one can be fertilized at a time. This is why women are the way they are. You have to show her that you stand out in some way, you're special in some way.

5) Don't show a woman your true self until you're in a romantic relationship with her.
If something about you is embarrassing, odds are, it's for a reason. She doesn't need to know everything about you. Do you secretly listen to Carly Rae Jepsen (like me)? She doesn't need to know that. Do you play video games perhaps too much? She doesn't need to know that (I've seen more than one dating site profile that specifically says they don't want to date gamers). Do you post on 4chan all the time? She really doesn't need to know that.

Here's the thing...in modern American society, gender might be becoming skewed, and the "rules of attraction" might be becoming skewed, but all the evidence suggests that women are still very much into the same kind of man they have been throughout history. You might think that a girl who listens to heavy metal is sexy as fuck, but I guarantee you that 99% of women wouldn't feel the same way about a man who listens to feminine music. While they would never admit it, most women simply want a guy who's into manly stuff. It's biological, man. Some women just won't be attracted to you because of how you physically look. Some women won't be attracted to you because of what you're into and what you like to do. Keep that secret so she won't decide you're not attractive before you've even had a chance to woo her.

But there's a caveat: once love enters the equation, things change a bit. If you're lucky enough to have a girl fall in love with you, she'll likely be able to deal with these quirks as just that, quirky things about you. At this point you can hope that the girl just won't find them unattractive.

The point is, the hardest part is getting a girl into you romantically. In my view, you have to really walk on eggshells until that happens, within reason. Don't play it completely safe, after all, you have to be interesting to her. But just don't drop any unusual quirks or opinions until she's already decided that you're a potential mate.

6) Girls just wanna have fun. If you've been on a date with a girl, that's awesome! Now it's time to shake things up for the next date though. Try to go different places, do different things, be outside, show her that you're spontaneous, creative, and open-minded.

7) And, another bit of advice which may be unpopular...try to have sex as soon as you think she might be willing, or at least a kiss. This is just my personal experience, but once you've had sex with a girl, so much of the anxiety and nerves about dating is just....gone. I mean, you've had sex with this woman. She's clearly at least attracted to you, and now you have proof. Now you don't need to try so hard, you can relax a little bit, or in my case, a lot. The idea is to get some kind of confirmation that she's attracted to you. Like I said, a kiss will do, but sex is obviously better.

good luck anons

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>>38981168
>>38981200
>>38981183
Bro your first tip should be if they dont seem interested then move on cause youll just look creepy

>blackpills not allowed here
can't handle the truth, huh?

>>38981140
>Apply to over 50 jobs in the past 2 months
>1 reply
>That reply turns out to be a waste of time because It didn't even lead to an interview

Fuck me then.

>>38981237
It's worse than that. Bitches lead you on all the time just to see if they can seduce you, loving the attention, but have no intention of actually doing anything with you. There's no reason to bother even if she seems interested.

>>38981302
Are you following the theres no shame in the game rule?

>>38981237
>>38981315
well if you are in a bar and she doesnt seem that interested you arent going to just walk away are you?
might as well try to be funny and see if it works

>>38981476
I would just walk away, yeah. I rather not waste my time looking like a desperate fool. I've always been like that.

I wouldn't talk to anyone in a bar if I'm there by myself anyway though.

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Here are a few tips I've found really helpful recently, hopefully someone will get some use from them.
Stop drinking caffeine, at most have one cup per day and make sure that it is before midday. Never ever drink caffeine after noon. It used to take me up to two hours in bed to fall asleep, since I made this change I can fall asleep within ten minutes. The quality of sleep you get will negate the need for caffeine completely.
Drink lots of water. I've been getting through at least two 2L bottles of water per day but try to get even more. It helps you feel alert, improves your skin, and being full of water stops you from feeling hungry and eating junk food. Don't use plastic water bottles for this btw.
If you're having trouble with consuming too many calories, trying only eating 60% of your meal and then stopping for a ten minute break. This gives time for the food to settle in your stomach and most of the time you will not feel like finishing what you have left.
Stop using shampoo, just wash your hair with warm water every day. It will look greasy for a few days but after your hair adjusts and your sebum production balances out, it will become fuller, better looking, and healthier. Saves on money and time as well.
Get a job for a couple of months which requires you to talk on the phone, for me it was IT support. This will help you to develop confidence in your speaking and mannerisms. It won't help you with small talk, but gaining the ability to speak without mumbling is extremely good for social endeavours.
Check out YT for instructional videos on improving your posture, there are plenty of exercises to help with any problems you may have. Being able to stand with confidence and not look like a freak may take some time to develop but it's worth it. Also check out jaw stretching exercises if you're a chinlet.
I still have a way to go in terms of making friends/getting a GF so I'm just working on making myself more presentable and confident, hope some of this helps.

>>38981476
No you walk away. She will already think youre creepy and talking to her more will not get you anywhere. Ask any girl and they will tell you the same

Does anyone here have the discord link that is usually posted on these kind of threads?

>>38981155
Can you please expose your plan?

>>38981451
Getting a job isn't the same as getting laid anon.

>>38982504
do you happen to be from england?

The most important self-improvement tip you can learn is that self-improvement doesn't work.

>>38982827

Yep, 100% this.

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>>38982807
Yes I am, H-how did you know?

>>38982899

I don't know if that's true. Certainly, it is important to recognize things you can't improve (height, dick size, family, etc).

However, you can certainly improve the spergy aspects. I was an absolute shut in from about 13-16 because my family moved. I'm an average looking dude, but learned to socially adapt. To NEETs and people who really haven't flourished since high school, they can learn to self improve through volunteering or getting a job. Even just message a fucking girl on OKCupid.

Piss poor attitude breeds the same results, dawgy

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Comfort and happiness are held in ridiculously high regard. People have higher living standards than most historical kings. Epictetus recommended using voluntary discomfort to set the baseline for happiness and comfort much lower.

> Cold Showers
>NoFap
>Exercising in the morning
>Walking in the cold without a jumper
>Fasting for a day
>Sleeping on the floor

All these things will change your relationship with comfort. Once you overcome the need for comfort, life will become much easier. Setting your goals and sticking to them will be far easier. This method will harden you up for life.

Looking into getting into airplane mechanic, my biggest fear is that I go to school and fail and end up in more debt, I'm not the smartest but if any of you could give me some confidence I'd appreciate it grately, or just general tips you have for success. If I don't respond here's my throwaway bc id like to keep in contact if you wouldn't mind speaking to me. [email protected]

>>38982920
you reminded me of this video
https://youtu.be/9rPPipsbhn0

>>38981140
Getting a job has helped me immensely. I sleep 9 hours a night and wake up fresh, I feel good and fulfilled. I eat better and get some physical activity, too.

It helps that it's basically the literal best job I could dream of as a programmer still in college.

>>38982967

Nope, it's all genetic. Looks is genetics, personality is genetic. There's no such thing as self improvement - you are what you are.

>>38982967
>get a job
>speak to no one because of anxiety

Shut the fuck about your flourishing shit.

>>38983162
Stop being so fucking anxious then, retard.

>>38983175
I don't know how retard.

I need some advice, please

>27
>thinking of moving in with my girlfriend
>never moved out of my Mom's house before
>she has issues, has been really depressed since my sister moved states to live with her fiance, and I don't want to hurt her by being away from her and push her over the edge
>really want to live with my girlfriend and see her every day

Here's the problem
>I have to live with my girlfriend and her husband
>Her husband doesn't know we're together
>neither do her kids

What do I do?

Fell in love with a pornstar today and it irked me enough to motivate me for the day
>worked out
>practised guitar for a few hours
>made a solid crypto trade

Just got to keep trying to find a legit job so I can move out now

>>38983403
>Fell in love with a pornstar today
which one?

>>38983036
Honestly this. I never worded it like that "setting the bar for happiness/comfort to a lower standard," but I follow the same principle. I pretty much said l, "I need to suffer, that is the only way I can improve my body."

Be that long distance running
Gym
Wake up early
Cold showers
Doing my best at work
Taking chances with social interactions
Eating a lot of HEALTHY food
Etc

If you do this everyday to the fullest extent, you'll collapse by the time it's time to go to sleep; no time for that over thinking bullshit, no time to be lazy, no time to sit around and play vidya, and it's because you are suffering for the greater good of yourself.

>>38983320

What in the original fuck am I reading up in this piece, my nigga?

I've been working on math and neuroscience lately. What I do is I go one week using coffee (500 mL a day, might reduce to 250) and learning math, then I switch over and do one week of no coffee and learning neuroscience. I do this so that I never build a tolerance or become addicted to caffeine. I might add programming to the no coffee week, I already completed a basic Python course a few months ago so I know most of the syntax but I lost interest.

>>38981302
Try applying to shitty jobs, like janitors, berry pickers, and dishwashers

>>38983093
Same here anon, the only problem for me now is relapsing.

When I was younger I never:
Had a loving family
Learned to play sports
Never went to camp
Never made friends
Never accepted who I was

I just played vidya all day everyday and that's literally all I know despite me dropping vidya for two years now completely. It's in my brain system now, I can't get away from vidya and the internet. I wasted all of July and I'm trying to be productive here in august but not luck so far.

I need a schedule to put me in my place or else I go back to my core: being degenerate.

>>38983459
I'm not making a joke, this is my actual situation. I'm a 27 year old faggot who wants to live with his girlfriend, but is afraid of upsetting is Mom and his girlfriend's husband and kids finding out.

>>38983505

>has a girlfriend
>she is married
>wants to live with them

Congrats on being a Chad. Just know that if she cheated on her husband with you then you will most certainly get cheated on yourself my man.

>>38983426
broccolibutts.tumblr.com/

Can't get it off my mind and it's still pissing me off

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>>38981539
>If you're having trouble with consuming too many calories
>tfw have trouble with consuming not enough calories

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I can only give my personal "methods" because there isn't a formula to attraction and >>38981168 sounds a little out of touch.

1) Stop caring. Not ironically either. Bitterness is a symptom of caring. I.e.; bought Stacey a drink and she acts like a bitch? Oh well. That's just one more cunt that you know doesn't have to be in your life.
2) Go outside. Fucking do it. I don't fucking care if you hate people. That's part of the problem. You're just as much a piece of trash as the rest of them. Probably even more. Drill that into your head and remember that it's ok.
3) Learn to shut the fuck up when you have nothing to say. Or, if you really want to take it a step further, say that you have nothing to say, and learn to be comfortable with letting other people in on that fact, even if it could be seen as socially awkward.
4) Learn to like looking stupid in front of people. Learn to treat it as an opportunity to make others laugh, because if you own it, it can't hurt you.

If you've done these successfully, you'll have cultivated a well rounded personality that isn't toxic. By that point it won't even matter if you have a gf.

>>38983781
>2) Go outside. Fucking do it. I don't fucking care if you hate people. That's part of the problem. You're just as much a piece of trash as the rest of them. Probably even more. Drill that into your head and remember that it's ok.
What do people really mean when they say "go outside"? Go to a pub and sit by some random group of strangers?

>>38981259
>black pills
The "truth" about women
Told by people who don't frequent them

>>38983895
Just go outside. Take a walk, go to the library, look up stores that interest you and visit them, buy some stuff for you. Don't treat it as an opportunity to meet people. That should be incidental. The point is to live life for you.

>>38983948
I sit for hours at a time on benches in parks with my kindle and I'm still the same retard

>>38983979
Being a retard is inherent to being human. Just don't ignore all the other points I made. Either way, this is what worked for me. It's what makes me able to enjoy saying harmless stupid shit to people and enjoying their secondhand embarrassment when they realize I don't actually care.

>>38983320
Idk if this is bait or not but seriously tell her to end it with her husband if you want to continue with her, also you'll be meme'd on for being a stepdad so good luck with that

>>38983948
you do realize that if i were to do that then the only people i would be talking to are those who talk to me first right
i have never (not a single time in the past) and very likely never will (not a single time in the future) initiated mall talk with a stranger

>>38984130
Are you misinterpreting what I said or just ignoring the whole "go outside and live for you" part? As it stands right now, you aren't fit to have a conversation with strangers. Hell I don't talk to strangers often either. Most people don't outside of while at their jobs. Stop trying to make your self improvement about meeting people anon.

>>38984451
the point is that going outside more than i already do (work, college class) will serve no benefit to any socialization skills of mine no matter how much i do it
could it boost confidence and self-drive a bit? perhaps
but it's not going to give me any more experience communicating with people than i would if i stayed at home. its like saying that spending half an hour standing in the kitchen is going to make me better at cooking

>>38984519
Stop making your self improvement about meeting people. Their acceptance of you should be an added benefit to you being better. Do I need to say that again? Or do you actually think your points are relevant to what I've been saying?

>>38984588
my primary pitfall is my absolutely horrid ability to socialize
I'm fairly well off in most other areas. I exercise, have a job, and am about to take a few classes in college that I know i will enjoy. i dont suffer depression
But I'm fucking shit at socializing with other people, so any self-improvement i do needs to be geared towards that

>>38984819
And the cause of your social ineptitude is what? Lack of experience? Or fear of rejection?

>>38984869
both, and the fact that i have notable difficulty actually understanding social cues and how to act and what to say and shit
some people do say 'just be brave and go start a conversation with someone' which i'd be willing to do if i had the slightest clue what to say

>>38981140
i want skin like hers

I don't really have any advice that can get you girls or will fix your mental illnesses or make you happy, in fact since the beginning of this year my mental health has probably degraded even further. BUT, at the same time, this has been my most productive year ever.

Some time at the end of last year I sort of tapped in to something that i really wanted to achieve that whole year. Before that my self-hatred would diminish all motivation and lots of times when i could go to the gym or train martial arts, which i pay like 300 a month for, i just chose to go home and play video games, listen to music, or just browse 4chan/youtube as a way of coping. I would have bursts of motivation where i would say i was going to change from this point on and start having a plan and everything but as soon i made one mistake it would destroy my self-esteem and all my motivation would unravel and i'd go back to the same ole habits. A lot of times i used to have this big anxiety of time flying by quickly when ever i'd be productive and i would try to slow time down by going on the internet a lot and stuff like that. That habit goes back to freshman and sophmore year of highschool when i was in a deep depression where the closer the end of the day came when i was home the more anxious i would get because i knew i would have to go back in the morning so i would try to use as much time possible playing skyrim or what ever.

But i reached a point last year where i finally stopped giving a shit. I realized that there's no reason for me to have any reserve if I'm so suicidal. There's no reason for me to try to cope for my depression by doing the same habits. I thought, if i am really destined to fail and if i really have no hope then fuck it, fuck my mental health, fuck my life, i don't care any more. I'm going to force myself to be productive, not to make myself happy, but because i say so and because nothing will change.

cont...

>>38981140
>self-masturbation thread
>a pic of a whore
>r9k
>mfw no gf last 24 hours oh im so lonely((( so robot
what an ugly piece of pathetic shit you are

These vacations I started healing my skin, finished a book, read 3 chapters of an economics textbook and did a bunch of work for my thesis.

Weightloss is giving me trouble, desu.

I wish I knew exactly how many calories everything has.

>>38984917
Fear of rejection is a more important issue. It feeds the anxiety, which creates the tendency to avoid interaction. The whole point about living for you, owning your retardation, and being able to be comfortable with silence is that doing so addresses your fear of rejection. It puts you in the vulnerable position of being a flawed person in front of others. As long as you openly accept that about yourself, others people will too.
Treating interaction like a formula is only going to make things more awkward. You have to break down your fears, hypothetically think of the worst case scenarios, and learn to accept them at possibilities that, while painful, won't be the end.

>>38981539
nope I gotta wash my hair everyday. tried doing that thing where you wash only every two days. smelled like a wildebeest, dandruff galore, and lice as well. never again.

>>38983228
Don't stay in your head so much, seriously. If you think a lot you're always bound to come up with something stupid that will trigger your anxiety. If you can't do that then distract yourself, I repeat my favourite songs in my head, but find something that suits you.

>>38983727
That's no porn star, son. That's an amateur faggot.

>>38985067
Just eat until you feel satisfied but not full, by satisfied i mean when you know you ate enough for energy and not to get fat also read >>38981539

>>38984975
cont

I remember reading something someone posted here saying that when someone reaches a state of genuinely considering suicide that they shouldn't kill themselves if they really don't care any more and should just let go of everything and live like if you were in GTA. It doesn't matter what happens because you wanna die anyways. Maybe things will turn out good or maybe you end up failing miserably. What ever.

I basically reached that point and just started to force myself to be productive. Consistently going to the gym, consistently training. Consistently reading and improving myself intellectually. The most I've ever been productive. At the same time i also somehow learned to convert my self-hatred, anxiety and sexual-frustration into motivation. I turned my productivity in to coping. This is kind of why my mental health has degraded more since then. Now i am impulsively productive. I literally have to go to the gym to regulate all of the internalized aggression and anger i have built up in me. I literally have to read wiki articles just to improve myself intellectually as a way of coping. Myself a year ago wouldn't believe the amount of effort i put in now. I have no idea where my productivity will take me. It may take me no where, i may end up killing myself either way, but at the very least there is an endless pool of motivation to keep the gears turning. Every time a girl looks at me with cold eyes, every bit of anxiety, every time i see a couple on the street, a girl smile to another man, every autistic thing i do every day all of the anger and frustration no longer defeats me but props me up and builds inside my like tense energy that needs to be released through productivity.

Maybe you can learn to do the same. It wont help you mentally but at least you'll be doing something with your life and thats that.

>>38985117
i dont care about rejection if i think that what i say can work because i know it wont happen
but when all that comes to mind even if i premeditate my opening is 'uh hows the weather'' or 'nice salad' or some retarded shit then yeah im going to fail hard becuase what i said is objectively dumb and unengaging

>>38985400
I'll try it out but sometimes I just end up eating sweets as well.

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>>38981168
>>38981183
>>38981200
Unironically Chad > PUA

>>38985132
Dude, if you can't go two days not shampooing your hair without stinking, shedding, and getting lice, then there's something wrong with your scalp, lice notwithstanding. You might need to do an antifungal treatment.

I have a massive intimacy problem. I'm very afraid of getting intimate with girls (like touching, flirting and etc.). However i dont have the same problem with mom - i can act free whatever i like. I guess that makes me very afraid of other people judging me but i cannot stop acting in such way that i wouldnt be truthful to myself. Is there a way to change it?

>>38981140

went for a piano lesson today, never touched an instrument before in my life and been browsing 4chan for 13+ years (30y/o now)

was pretty embarrassing, but hell maybe in a year i'll be able to play something

tomorrow i'm going to to for a walk around my local park.

>>38985442
Interacting people isn't a formula you can crack. Even if it were, you'd only be presenting a contrived shell that is only superficially human. Addressing your fears is actually something you can approach and systematically improve upon.

>>38985179

Seriously ace advice.

>>38985562
so im supposed to go out and act like an awkward fuck and embarrass/weird/creep out and alienate 75% of my town before I can become proficient at human interaction? what a great idea

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>>38981140
Does anybody have the time to do pic related?

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>>38981140
Mbti/personality discord
If you would like to find out more about your own or others people's personalities
Or if you need to pratise socialising and not be so
beta
MBTI General/Discord

Come here and post your types and talk about them.
>INTJ Edgelord
>INFP crybaby
>ENTP will never shut up
>INTP forever alone
>ISTJ the ultimate NPC
>ESTP Chad
>ENTJ your future boss
>INFJ the ultimate form of horse shoe theory. He's either hitler or an SJW
>ENFJ sjw or normie

MBTI tests
>Beginner level
https://www.16personalities.com/
http://jupiter-34.appspot.com/
>Advanced level
http://keirsey.jung.test.typologycentral.com/
http://keys2cognition.com/explore.htm
>Bonus test
https://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/dotest.php
http://similarminds.com/bigfive.html
http://www.celebritytypes.com/big-five-personality/test.php

discord:
/39dbhaY

>>38985644
>mbti
>discord
kys fag

>>38983499
>Because janitors and dishwashers are known for leading happy lives
You'd be better off not working than working a low class job.

>>38985613
>>38984588 remember when I said this? Remember how I asked if I had to repeat it? I'm not going to repeat it anon, because I was explicitly clear.

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>>38981168
>>38981183
>>38981200
>>38981215
I get what you're doing and thanks for the advice but I really hate over thinking in social interactions. I have attracted girls somehow and made connections with them in the past. don't ask me how I just did it somehow and most likely will never be able to do it again. I just liked kinda being in the moment and just enjoying talking to a girl instead of playing mind games. I have now lost that ability, but every day I imagine finding a new girl that I will fall in love with and hopefully just talk into loving me like before but not letting her go this time.

>>38985506
holy shit man are you me ?! but i have slightly different case , when a girl is indifferent to me i dont have any problems with talking , touching , hugging etc but when shit gets intimate i just go spaghetti

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>>38985686
>lol just walk around by urself and never talk to people, and one day youll suddenly know what to say to start conversation

>>38985726
>>38983781 here's what I actually said anon. You're just focused solely on talking to people because you think their acceptance improve you.
>>38985117 also feel this was poignant too when put in the greater context of my first post.
I understand you have a very low work ethic, but at least admit that you're lack of trying everything I mentioned makes it sound like you're looking for reasons not to.

>>38985416
Also when you try to improve yourself something thats helped is following a rule of three. In that, when i have a new plan and stack on more productivity into my week. I usually give myself three weeks to do it to prove that i've gained a new threshold of productivity that i can handle. Everyone has a minimum amount they can take before they break and lose all motivation and what you should do is slowly increase that threshold. I didnt't realize that last year and would load a hole bunch on myself and raise the standard too high instead of slowly increasing productivity. You shouldn't do it on a week by week basis either because i think i takes three weeks to make a new self.

Say if you want to start reading every night. Instead of increasing the amount every week do it every three. First week is testing the waters, second week is anchoring yourself an proving you can do it again and the third is to set it in stone. A lot of times i'd say i will change, have a good first week and try to increase the standard the next week but would crumble mid way because i didnt even establish that i could handle the new productivity for another week straight.

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>>38985669
Not anymore, i met my gf there
>Prettyfuckingimproving
Fggt.

>>38985874
No, the thing is that I'm not content living a life of solitude where i have no close connections to anyone

So sure, I can go wander outside doing bumfuck nothing. I could actually go fucking do that and I just might. But what is it going to accomplish for me that I actually think has to be 'accomplished' that I dont already feel content with?
>learn to shut the fuck up when you have nothing to say
except i never do have anything to say and thus i already dont say anything
and by never saying anything im making no progress towards socialization

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Since I spend so much time at home, I've put myself on a schedule. It sounds autistic, but it really works to help me accomplish stuff I've been putting off otherwise. Stuff like:

10:00 am - Work out
11:00 - Work on cleaning room
11:30 - Do dishes
12:00 - Practice drawing
1:00 - Practice writing

Stuff like that. When I have it written out in front of me, and I notice it's five minutes past when I was supposed to start something, I'll get this "Oh shit!" feeling and go do it. This is the first time I've been really able to motivate myself - otherwise I'm just aimlessly fucking around all day. It's actually making me feel a lot better about myself.

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>>38985958
As you currently are, learning to love yourself is more important than learning how to interact with people. As you currently are, learning to love yourself is more important than learning how to interact with people. As you currently are, learning to love yourself is more important than learning how to interact with people. As you currently are, learning to love yourself is more important than learning how to interact with people. As you currently are, learning to love yourself is more important than learning how to interact with people. As you currently are, learning to love yourself is more important than learning how to interact with people. As you currently are, learning to love yourself is more important than learning how to interact with people. As you currently are, learning to love yourself is more important than learning how to interact with people. As you currently are, learning to love yourself is more important than learning how to interact with people.

Anyone managed to overcome social awkwardness / autism? For example today I had to check out a house I was thinking of renting and when I was talking to the people that lived there I was a sweaty awkward mess. They must of thought I was insane or something. I'm probably not going to get a call back from them because of it. Is it even possible to fix that kind of shit?

>>38985633
This post can be summed in this clip:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBz0BTb83H8

>>38986012
>love yourself meme
sure thats great let me just throw away all possibilities to network and find more successful and higher paying jobs and any hope for a future companion should i decide i want one, because i love myself! hooray! everything is fine!!!!

>tfw you always thought you were ugly and people only tolerated you because of your amazing intelligence and interesting creative output
>tfw you 28 years later you realize that you were actually autistic and retarded and annoying the whole time and people only tolerated you b/c you were qt and now you are at the tail end of qt-hood

is there any recovering from this

>>38985633
>I am not a misogynist...I love women
Was that anon just saying this because he likes the sensation of sex? I don't see how a person this red pilled could possibly love such a creature as he described.

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>>38986081
Schopenhauer would agree.

>>38986176
Schopenhauer was a poodle owner.

>be 22
>NEET and 200lbs unhealthy
>now 26
>getting first proper career job, about to get married, 40lbs lighter and healthy

22 was my low point but it was going downhill for years..

>>38981532

That's why you are alone and miserable.

>>38986081
that's not the point
before others can help you, you need to help yourself
if you aren't sure of yourself how can anyone you network with be sure of you?

>>38983747
Same feel anon. I'm trying to get /fit/ and feel like I'm going to vommit all the time trying to eat enough calories to gain. Still have only gained 15lbs in 8 months.

>>38985506

Babysteps

How I learned to socialize a little bit:
I told myself I absolutely had to make friends no matter who they were one year when I was going into a new school, so to make it easier on me I looked for a friendly, outgoing person in the room and caught them when they were alone and got their attention so they'd talk to me. The idea behind this was to talk to someone who knew how to guide any convo, even one with an immensely awkward, insecure fuck like myself, and keep it going long enough to become familiar. It's a fat gay guy, the hypersocial girly type, we get sorta friendly, and by letting myself get dragged along with him for the first few days it made it easier to talk to other people that had similar interests and I was essentially leeching off this guy's social skills to fake my own and have him make friends for me. I managed to actually make friends with two people and they gave me confidence to talk to others and I was able to grow from there.

I wouldn't exactly recommend my approach but it worked for me so I thought I'd share.

>>38985893
Those are actually really nice tips, thanks anon

>>38987356
Yeah that works in general, i am currently trying to do the same and i alredy got 5 new friends

Wassup, Practicioner of Zen here.

I wrote this text a few days ago since I am, currently, undergoing the process of recovering from a heartbreak and the breaking up of a relationship that was very dear to me. Many here have, yet, to experience love and a relationship of love with a significant other and I am not here to rub it in your face since I am currently suffering from its end. I'm here, instead, to share perspective on the other faces of love you are yet to experience.

When we crave love, we think of all the good it brings us, all the things it makes us crave and desire and, in our uncontrolled desire, we become frustrated and, when ti frustration is allowed to persist, it becomes agony and we grow to convince ourselves that there is no greater agony than loneliness.

There is much worse. To those of you who think that your worries will be over once you find love, they are only starting. However, don't take my warning as discouragement. Suffering is a natural part of the human experience and suffering from the loss of love is a grand teacher. It gives perspective to love and adds to its beauty in my opinion. Still, be prepared. Welcome it, but steady yourself, it's a powerful storm.

That being said, I hope my letter helps some of you better understand the importance of being free to love and to be able to let go of past wounds. Despite practicing Zen and writing all of this, keep in mind that I'm not enlightened, to go through this pain is as hard for me as it is for anyone else. To be able to let go is a lifelong challenge.

>>38989046


Forgot link

https://pastebin.com/tbPyDti8

>>38983433
This
I've been walking 4 miles a day with my dog and running 3 on the treadmill. Eating only fish, chicken, eggs, nuts, fruits, veggies, and only drinking water.

I wake up at 5am every morning and feel great. Only have a few drinks every 2 or so weekends. Lost a ton of weight, been snagging pussy. Confidence level way up.

You can improve, you lazy faggots.

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>>38981140
Self improvement is normalfag propaganda. Join the Dark Side of the Pill. We have beer, weed and anime.

>>38989382

We got that too over at normieworld except there's also sex and companionship.

>>38989740
Reee, sex and companionship is fro normans, we are alnoen and sad and wallow in self pity, how could we do thati if we acually got some stuff to be happy for and proud about reee.

>>38981539
i literally did everything you said in this post including working at a call center and i am still a virgin boy, fuck you and your shit advice, where is the advice where i pull all the hot bitches for me to fuck?

>>38983463
This goes against the conventional wisdom for caffeine's effect on mental performance. Addicts on caffeine perform the best, addicts off caffeine perform the worst, non-addicts on caffeine are outperformed by non-addicts off caffeine.

>>38985633
this image is so accurate it hurts

>>38983948
>>38983895
Thrift stores are great places.

>>38990233
Can you give me a source? I've never heard of it, but interested if true.

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There's a cute girl who's going to start working at my job tomorrow, and I'll be mostly alone with her all day while I train her. Besides downing a shot of vodka before I go to work, how do I make a good first impression and make myself look like boyfriend material?

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How do I be attractive?

>>38981215
You have any tips for women?

I approached this guy and got rejected. Still feeling pretty bad because this has happened before. I tried a lot of your tips (listening, asking about him).

>>38983320
Then living with her was never an option to begin with, but your larping so you don't have to worry about that.

Any advice to stop masterbating? Any Chastity cages that I can't pull off?

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>>38981140
Who here /3AM workouts/. Only way to go as a robot (unless you have home gym)

Also: how much do you need to bench to get someone to love you?

>>38992148
what exercises do you do?
do you change your routine every once in a while?

>>38992148
>Tuesday and Friday: Chest/Shoulders Days
Dumbbell bench press 3x10
OHP 3x10
Hanging Leg Raises 3x20
Incline Dumbbell bench press 3x10
Dumbbell Lateral raise 3x10
Pec Deck Fly Machine 3x10
Dumbbell Front Raise 3x10
Reverse Pec Deck Fly Machine 3x10
Ab Crunch Machine 2x12

>Friday and Sunday: Arms/Back Days
Hammer Curls 3x10
Seated Dumbbell Tricep Extension 3x10
Low Row 3x10
Rope Pushdown 3x10
Shrugs 3x10
Ab Crunch Machine 2x12

I am v weak, only dumbbell bench using like 50s. But that is because I have never lifted on a caloric surplus, only ever cut. I eat ~400 calories below maintenance. Will probably add legs when I eat above maintenance, but they are mostly irrelevant for the body I want (ottermode). I don't change routine

>>38992378
for >>38992247
my bad

>>38981140
chad here

my little brother has gotten into the anime/nightcore community and now he's engaged in "anime roleplaying"

how the fuck do I fix him before it's too late

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>>38992378
>>38992388
much appreciated fellow robot

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i feel like i dont belong anywhere and im the most boring person in the world. how i can change?

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going to stop fapping so much to gay stuff and goign down that road, I think that would be good to stop doing.

>>38992378
Legs aside, how are you doing abs-wise? Have you thought about throwing in a couple planks or crunches or anything?

I've always had an awful habit of neglecting abs, and it caught up to me real fucking fast when I could only manage 55 sit ups in 2 minutes during my fitness test.

>>38981168
>>38981183
>Alcohol
I don't drink. It's degenerate.

>Actively try to be funny
I'm not a clown. Fuck you.

>Find common ground as quickly as possible
This is sensible.

>Ask the girl questions about herself
She'll think I'm a creep. They all do.

>Don't show a woman your true self
There is only one me and that's the true me. If she doesn't like that she can rot in the ground for all I care. I don't want a relationship built on lies.

>Girls just wanna have fun
No they don't. They all like the same old lame-ass normie shit. They don't have an adventurous heart.

>try to have sex as soon as you think she might be willing, or at least a kiss
Great advice, asshole. Thanks for nothing

>>38981183
>The way I met my most serious girlfriend was me sending her a message noting that she was a huge fan of the same video game that I was. That game provided the entire structure of the beginning of our relationship, basically.


stopped reading there

>>38992546
I haven't thought about adding more to abs because I already train them 4 days a week. I doubt training abs at all is necessary - far more important to drop bodyfat. As the saying goes, "abs are made in the kitchen"

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I AM IMRPROVING.
Got my job at 21 and have been holding it for 8 months now.
Started my driving license due to Initial D and am a month a way from finishing it
Bought a car and my mummy has been helping me learn too.

I'm finally starting to feel like I'm entering the life. When I actually finish getting the license, I'll lose all purpose and don't know what I'll do next except night rides with eurobeat

>>38992592
>I doubt training abs at all is necessary - far more important to drop bodyfat.

Eh I guess this depends on why you're working out. I'm not super fussed about having visible abs, but I do need to step up my sit up game for my fitness assessments lol.

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>>38983052
Hey I noticed no one replied to your post. Just do it anon~

>>38986166
do u love tasty food even though its just a bunch of molecules arranged to pleasure you?

Getting EMT certified and saying goodbye to NEETism

>>38993014
See, you're arguing with different definitions that I'm not using. With your definition of love your analogy can actually be literal and not an analogy at all. That he says he loves women because he likes slaughtering, butchering, gutting, preparing, cooking and eventually eating women, maybe they're tasty food.

My question was more: "How can this guy like evil people even though he knows they're evil?" and I guess you're saying it's not a moral thing at all, you seem to be saying it's a purely physical and carnal love on his part. In that case, he doesn't really love women, he loves having sex with women, which seems like a redundant point considering so I don't think he meant that and if he didn't then how could he possibly mean anything else? How could he love such a wicked group of people that happen to be so easily manipulated?

>>38989046
>>38989075

Wow, very wise words, anon. Thanks for sharing.

>>38982967

I've done all of that,

I'm still lonely, miserable, and autistic except now I can buy video games on steam instead of having to steal them.

Most of your life is determined when you are conceived.