The Beta Uprising

All right, I'll bite. I'll give this a bump.

Keep us posted, OP

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>three months into the war
>My platoon and I had captured and secured a strip mall
>Raiding a chipotle, we found four CANS locked in the girls bathroom
>Even hiding from certain death, the Stacey had her mouth on Chad's cock
>We hung them from the streetlamps outside.
>One of the robots in my platoon castrated Chad after-death
>He hung the bloody testes on a wire around his neck
>This was his seventh pair. The stench was unbearable
>But we were all too autistic to tell him to cut it out

>The strip mall was determined as prime territory for potential fort
>We secured it with barbed wire and land mines, made of homemade dynamite and napalm
>The platoon's fervor to secure the fort distracted us from the going-ons of the war.
>Within days we were unknowingly surrounded by CANS. They struck at night.

Keep it going OP. Though in the future you should just have this pre-typed.

Tell us more about kek division when you can.

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>I was on the roof of the chipotle with two other robots in my Platoon, keeping watch.
>Half-asleep. Sometime past two in the morning.
>Ponyfag (he actually fucking called himself Ponyfag, I wish I was joking) and Jones
>Pongfag was four-hundred pounds
>diehard MLP fan
>fell asleep at night holding his blue-glitter painted shotgun like a teddy bear
>Jones was rail-thin, never spoke, and stank of BO and marinara sauce.
>But he was a good shot
>I trusted them immeasurably
>We all owed one another our lives on several occasions.

>The open-top jeep came roaring down the road at 70+ miles per hour, right toward the strip mall.
>The Chads inside wooped and yelled, hi-fiving one another, pumping their guns in the air.
>Jones opened fire, maybe grazed one of them.
>Ponyfag screamed, fired blindly. At this point, we could see at least five more cars behind the jeep
>Jones was unfazed, firing shot after shot from his bolt-action rifle.
>The cars crashed right into the barbed fire and chads spilled out into the strip-mall fort
>Jones, Ponyfag got as low as possible, praying they hadn't noticed us up here.

>But they had, and moments later, I heard the hiss of a fuse, saw the dynamite they had tossed onto the roof.
>I made eye-contact with ponyfag
>Without a second's hesitatoin he grabbed me in his greasy, gross arms, spun around, shielding me from the dynamite.
>The explosion blew us both backwards. I still hear the ringing in my ears.
>I knew at a glance Ponyfag was a goner. Jones was nowhere to be seen.
>I heard the chads below me
>"NICE THROW, BRAH! WOOT!"

cont.

When is this going to turn into gay slashfic? Soon, I hope.

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>>38968408

Thank you for your service.

continuing from my last post

>The dynamite explosion had left a hole in the roof
>I weighed my options
>I had nowhere to go but up
>or down through the hole.
>Every second I waited was another one that the Chads might enter the chipotle
>Without waiting, I slipped down, landing roughly on a pile of rubble.
>I ducked behind the counter, unseen.
>I could hear the roars of the Chads outside
>Worse, I could hear the screams of burning robots
>Flamethrowers.
>the Chads had no dignity.

>"WATCH THEM BURN, HOMIES"
>"SHOULDN'T HAVE SKIPPED GYM CLASS, YA FAT FUCK"
>"THIS LARD BURNS EVEN HOTTER THAN STACEY LOOKS"

god the fucking mongoloids they were

>Angry as I was, I knew exposing myself was a death sentance.
>I had a cause, a rebellion to fight for.
>For Elliot, I whispered to myself

>Slipping through the kitchen, I exited into an alley
>Next to the chipotle was a Gold's Gym.
>I kicked in the back door, praying the sound wouldn't alert the Chads.

>Inside were three other wide-eyed robots from my platoon, curled up, hiding.
>Jones was there, gun pointed straight at me.
>I shut the door best as I could
>None of us said a word.
>The only sound was the flames crackling, the Chads shouting.
>The robots screaming.

Bumped. The ending better be epic af.

This is strangely really entertaining, just imagining a fucking civil war between the betas and CANS.

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>We secured the back room of the Gold's Gym
>Desks were torn apart for boards, doors barricaded.
>One of the robots had the intellignce to grab some food and water.
>Enough for a few days, at most.
>I didn't think we even had that much time.

>The chads knew we were in there
>They pounded at the doors, yelled, called us faggots and virgins
>It's a miracle they never decided to explode their way in.
>I suppose dynamite and grenades must have been limited.

We spent a total of two weeks in that fucking back room. Drinking our own piss, four times over till there was nothing left. You think you're fucking hungry when your mom forgets your tendies? You don't know hunger till the food runs out on day five and there's nine more to go.

The dynamite from earlier had blown concrete chunks into Jones' leg. He died four days in. I remember the robots wanting to cannibalize him. I forbid it, waving my revolver around, threatening to blow apart anyone who tried. We spent most of our days hunched against the wall, staring at one another with sunken, tortured eyes.

Respite came on day fourteen.

bumppity this good shit

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>We heard screams of REEEEEEE in the distance
>The few of us with enough energy to move turned towards the wall, towards the noise
>CRAAAAASH
>Gunfire, a barrage of RATATATATATATATATAT
>The war cry "SU-PREME GENTLE-MAN" pounded in our ears
>hope soared through our hearts.

>The battle was short. Maybe ten, fifteen minutes.
>The chads left almost nobody to secure the fort after they took it.
>We were forgotten, left to die.

>Robots came in with crowbars, bashing down the doors
>I cried when I saw them.
>I didn't think I had enough moisture left in my eyes to cry.

>In the center plaza of the mall, we sat around a burning bonfire of CANS bodies
>Next to it were two POWs, hogtied and gagged.
>They were the leaders of the squad who attacked us.
>One was an asian Chad.
>His name was Hung Lo.
>The other was a white stacey, named Stacey.

>The division who rescued us was called themselves The Supreme Gentlemen.
>They engaged in pseudo-worship of Elliot Rodgers
>Leader was named Carlos "Cuthroat" Rosera.
>Hispanic, horrifically ugly, with a broken nose.
>He said a Chad broke it terribly when he was young
>this lack of facial aesthetics made him incel

>He paced in front of the fire
>"As you suffered at the hands of these scum, you have the right to take their lives"
>"No supreme gentleman would deny you that"

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>Normally, the stacey would have been raped
>Hung Lo would be disgured with hot knives, likely castrated, and hung
>Stacey would follow afterward.
>We were too weak for this ritual.
>The only one of us who could stand at this point was myself.
>I still had my handgun.

>BANG
>BANG

>Two shots ended two lives
>They sounded like they were a thousand miles away.
>I passed out right there, hearing faint cries of "PRAISE ELLIOT" in the backgrond

Woke up in a bed a few hours later. Ate hot tendies and drank cold milk and brandy. The Supreme Gentlemen took me in for the next few months. With enough demand and interest, I'll tell this story tonight or tomorrow.

I hope you understand how much we suffered for your freedom, robots. 2018 was a dark time.

>>38968960
Thank you for your service. Thank you for paying the price for our freedom, for our final triumph over Chad and Tyrone.

>>38968960
Continue comrade. I was one of the many /k/ommandos that aided in the uprising and i'd love to hear more of your stories

Beautiful. A true inspiration to those of us who spent the war playing Vidya.

Please continue this story Anon

originl

>>38968960
Thank you for your service anon, what rank were you?

Do you mind if I narrate this and post it to youtube after you're finished?

>>38970169

Please do. I will be posting another memoir of my time in the service sometime in the next few days. This chapter is complete

>>38970169
Post link when you're done or your video name please

bump so it does not go down

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any robotnik's here?

>>38971094

>underfolder

Why though