>tfw nothing left to feel

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i just want this fucking nightmare to end

>>38959589
I woke up thinking I was going to die the other day. I was strangely accepting of it.

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There is always another feel to feel

I should feel sad and ashamed of myself, but I feel empty like my body is too tired to go on being depressed. It takes too much effort to be self-loathing all the time. It doesn't take much to make me feel bad or cry, but nowadays whenever someone yells at me or scolds me I just don't feel anything anymore.

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There is always suffering. Your mind will always default to it.

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>>38959547
>tfw back and forth feeling where you keep thinking things will get better because they keep getting worse

Music is the only way I hold on nowadays, If I have the motivation that day

The thing that effects me the most is the roller coaster, whenever I've felt happy or any enjoyment and start to forget about the fact I want to die, something will come along quickly to remind me of how worthless I am and how stupid I was to attempt to be happy even for a fleeting moment

so i feel comfort in nothingness and try to keep myself emotionally sedated, it's better to feel comfort than bleak nothingness after the small moments of happiness, this way I'm not going to kill myself, at least not soon, eventually for sure when I get sick of this, but not atm


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95BwFLCVX9U
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UeSVu1zbF94&t
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ZZ0DYIkaP8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ua7TfcxJqRU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFQ4nuUuwNo

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>been isolated and depressed for so long that I've lost all emotions

>>38959883
>>38959547
This is when it gets better guys
>tfw after years of deep depresion i couldn't feel sad anymore nor happy
You can only keep going hoping that some joke makes you laugh or some thing makes you cry again.Or wait for your death whatever happens first