How often do you feeI like killing yourself?

Pretty often. More reasons to than not to.

>>38768226
Just everyday for as long as i can remember

Everyday

feelsfuckingbadman

>>38768226
Every day really.

File: 1369700363574.jpg (59KB, 600x585px) Image search: [Google]

59KB, 600x585px

>>38768226
Everyday when I'm in depressive states (pretty Sure I'm Bipolar), it really sucks, and I should be on meds but I'm afraid that meds might push me over that edge that I teeter on. One day robots, one day I'm gonna be happy, and you will too. Please keep pulling through.

>>38768459
No. You won't.
You can fool yourself, but truth will always find a way.

>>38768226
daily, but just the thought of "I want to kill myself" and a vague sense of a gun barrel being pressed up to my mouth occurs. only happens like 2-3 times a day

How close have you guys gotten to actually doing it? I stuck a gun in my mouth and pulled the trigger ever so slightly just to feel what its like

>>38768495
Do you feel better about yourself shitting all over people's optimism like that? Speak for yourself, loser.

>>38768515
im with this guy>>38768459
life is pretty decent, so many goons to see

File: 1501218373075.png (9KB, 338x339px) Image search: [Google]

9KB, 338x339px

>>38768226
I honestly think its apart of being well rounded in todays dramaticism. People are melancholic sublimminally so thinking about suicide is just par for the sane course in this 'modern' context. I have literally never felt so okay with occasionally thinking about suicide because at least it means I'm not a drone like the rest of the unfeeling consumers. Sounds edgy but i don't know how else to explain it. I would never kill myself btw. I don't care for those that do. It is just the idea that it is actually quantifiable and okay today to think about it. With all the meaninglessness being trudged around as high culture and philosophy.

DON'T FEEL BAD YOU ARE A RARE AND FEELING, HUMAN.

File: 1349142271181.jpg (38KB, 400x300px) Image search: [Google]

38KB, 400x300px

>>38768495
All I can do is try. I might fail but one day I'll make it.

File: 1501119774707.png (28KB, 350x420px) Image search: [Google]

28KB, 350x420px

>>38768226
2 days out of week. The rest of time I feel numb to fine.

File: article-2279444-179C85ED000005DC-696_634x591.jpg (120KB, 634x591px) Image search: [Google]

120KB, 634x591px

Does anyones antidepressants actually work??? I took lexapro for awhile and it kind of made me feel indifferent about everything. Still felt pretty suicidal.

>>38768529
I've actually tried a few times but failed cause I didnt do enough research beforehand. I know now that if I try again, it'll be my last one

>>38768638
Howd you try to do it? And manage to fail haha

>>38768671
Bleach+expired pills(I just threw up a lot), I also tried stabbing myself but I didnt hit an artery so I passed out after bleeding for a while and woke up feeling really weak but the bleeding had stopped and I had to go carry on with my day. I've tried stabbing myself in different places and I've tried oding on several different drugs it always ends in me feeling sort of shitty for a while but I never seem to die.

Every time I think about why no girl wants me.

>>38768827
Damn nigga im sorry. How would you do it if theres a next time?

Every day for the past 5 years. Sometimes it's just a mild "wouldn't it be nice if I didn't exist any more" and sometimes it's an actual suicide fantasy.
I have a shotgun and access to a full faced scuba system that I could fill with inert gas. I guess it means I don't really want to go yet.

most days but i can feel great and then like bottom of the barrel for some reason. i sometime put an unloaded shotgun in my mouth and try to think which angles would be instant death but lets face it even if i wanted to die doing it in a violent way is something id be too pussy todo and i hate that.

i remeber this hot girl from highschool who tried killing herself but it was with sleeping pills and she was fine when i kbew her butbi think why cant i grow some balls ffs.

i just want to have a way out if one day i become crazy ill with cancer or someshit

am i a pussy

nigger (ogogog 21010oringal)

>>38768226
daily my meds are all out of wack... :(

>>38768827
Stab yourself in the heart like Elliott Smith did.

pretty consistently since January. almost every day since mid June. I've prepared stuff twice, but the closest I got was taping up my car's exhaust and sitting in it, engine off keys in.

I don't think I will ever go through with it, but I still cut.

>>38768531
You know you're a fool.

Everyday I wish not to be alive.

I don't actually desire to kill myself often because that requires some seriously negative emotion, and I don't feel that way much. I mostly feel nothing.

>>38768226
nearly everyday I'm most likely never going to because I'm a massive bitch and I kind of want to see where my life will end up because I know I'm just a stupid fucking kid right now

File: 1496528188624.png (520KB, 1100x1100px) Image search: [Google]

520KB, 1100x1100px

>>38768637
Lexipro got the suicidal thoughts mostly away, but it made me even more apathetic and lazy, to the point where i just stayed in bed all day. It also contributed to my weight gain, and it made my penis feel near nothing, to the point that i would jerk off for 2 hours, then give up and not cum

>>38768226
every once in a while, I get confused of how my life is going and all of the sudden I realize that I dont deserve everything I have... even tho im cool with that. We are humans and we tend to kill ourselves.

File: 5vJ9NW.gif (935KB, 320x180px) Image search: [Google]

935KB, 320x180px

>>38768226
everyday its gotten to the point that i have to say it out loud to help

When I'm feeling really bad, many times per day

Everyday

Once in a while they'll be a day where it doesn't happen but that's only a few times a year.

>>38768226
Only when I wonder what will happen when I die.

Even though I know, I want to experience it for myself.

>>38768226
I feel like killing other people. This os my fucking world and you're all shitting it up. So please do me a favor and kill yourselves.

>>38770801
The idea of going on a killing rampage has crossed my mind on many occasion

>>38768459
Take the meds mate. They help a lot.

>>38770913
>Takes meds to feel better
>begins to not feel like ur own self
>stop taking meds to feel like self
>proceed to get worse

I would take meds but the time i did i dont remember

>>38768885
Hanging or a stab to the jugular/carotid. If I hang myself, the catch is that I have to find a tree. If I stab, I can just do it but its less likely to succeed and I'd have to explain the cut on my neck to the ppl around me.

>>38768226
Every day, truly. I'm already on three failed attempts. The only thing keeping me alive is a promise I made to my father.

most days for the past 12~ years

Everyday, without fail, everday.

>>38768226
idk like twice a month at least

Fairly often these days
Used to I would only think about it when I was suffering from a severe bout of depression
Now I seem to think about it every other day at least

File: 1454422419050.jpg (50KB, 562x702px) Image search: [Google]

50KB, 562x702px

>>38768226

There's not a waking minute that goes by that I don't think about it. It's been like this for a couple years now.

Been regularly thinking about it since like the second grade though, so it's probably just some annoying invasive thought habit I've trained up all my life.

Mostly when my chronic pain gets really bad.

At some point I realized the best way to tell if my pain was reaching a point where I needed to go lay down or stop driving was when I started wanting to die.

>>38768226
I don't usually feel that bad unless I've been deep in thought for hours, but I do feel lonely a lot.

Sometimes I wish that I'd never been born at all, however that's actually an entirely different feeling.

I stopped thinking about death. Now I just feel empty. Everything I loved playing is now a drag. Having no one to play vidya with makes me feel even more alone.

File: 1458947478545.png (360KB, 600x600px) Image search: [Google]

360KB, 600x600px

>>38768226
i used to think about it everday for the last 2 years, but i've gotten better and think about it a lot less. maybe just once a week or less. but my feelings are a lot more intense.

my depression is the worst it has ever been
i just feel drained with no energy, tired no matter how long i sleep.
no motivation to do anything

i want to become independant
i applied to jobs, got my pratice driver permit
i got no response and i feel no motivation to drive, only person who will drive with me is my dad and he will only take me on sundays if he feels up to it even then i just feel to exhausted to do it

i feel like if i became independant then i can fix myself. i hate having no control over my life. my parents are so controlling and dont give me anything other then food and a room.
i need to be able to take care of myself because my parents dont even attempt to.
but i cant because no job or money so i just sit in my room all day and i cant become independant because im just exhausted no matter what

Every day since around June last year.
I'm bad at expressing how I feel so I won't even try, but I generally have a feeling of simply wanting to disappear.

If I were to ever do it, my plan is going by train, since I have no place for hanging and no access to guns whatsoever.

A month ago I would have said every minute, and hell, on a really bad day, that's painfully accurate.
I'm thankful to say that I'm slowly crawling my way out of it, but holy shit does it drag me back in some days.

I've actually been thinking about visiting a psych and getting some meds? Is it true what they say? Do they just make you numb? Maybe that would just be for the best at this point. The lows are way too damn low to justify the middling highs I get nowadays. Maybe I need to just accept that it's either the bullet or the numbing pill at this point. I don't fucking know anymore.

>>38768226
I have no such feels anymore

File: My instincts tell me.png (6KB, 253x243px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 253x243px

>>38768226
Every time I go to work or have to come home.

Fuck retail.

>>38770978
>Anonymous 07/31/17(Mon)21:55:56 No.38770978>>38770913
>>Takes meds to feel better
>>begins to not feel like ur own self
>>stop taking meds to feel like self
>>proceed to get worse
>
>I would take meds but the time i did i dont remember
when can we get off please
this hasn't been fun in so long

Ever since my girlfriend broke up with me and started dating other people, pretty often....at least for a few months.

But then I realized that I could kill myself, leave a bitter suicide note, etc, and it probably wouldn't do near the amount of damage I'd like to do. I wouldn't be able to even witness any of her suffering either. I'd just be yet another mentally ill guy who killed himself after rejection.

So, I figure the much better (yet much more difficult) option is to step up my game and become a person that would never want to settle for a girl like her. Get in shape, get a better career, a better circle of friends, etc.

No one cares about people who kill themselves. After they die, they're just words on the page of a newspaper, a stone in the middle of a cemetary, etc. But people who stand on their own two feet and become more awesome than anyone could have guessed? They leave an impression that can last for years and years.

File: outout.jpg (106KB, 960x720px) Image search: [Google]

106KB, 960x720px

>>38774173
fuck off normie mcnormanstein

>>38773744

you need to go and apply for your neetbux/autism bux if you aren't working and have no money my man

extort the beneficiary services for as much as you can use it to better your life/go places/do stuff

>>38774275

i'd rather be a normie than some motherfucker who just lives on excuses and bullshit

>>38774287
>then why are you here? kid

File: 88.jpg (18KB, 240x240px) Image search: [Google]

18KB, 240x240px

>>38774287
you think this is a life?
I'm really happy for you kike cocksucker

>>38774309

i've been on /r9k/ since 2009. i came for the intellectual discussion, stayed because this makes for a good place to blow off steam and get my emotions out

Does anyone know what happened to the suicide board of infinite chan? I can't find it anymore.

>>38775845
still exists but is slow
found some excellent nembutal info there

peeps say that a shotgun aimed basically anywhere up and back in the mouth with a shotgun wpuld be instant lifhts out but ehat if you just shot the spine?

File: dabbing pepe.png (6KB, 264x191px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 264x191px

>tfw severe depression runs in the family
>tfw my mom and sister are both on pills of it because they literally cannot function without them
>I literally cannot go an hour without obsessing over killing myself, in very obscure ways
>They tell me to suck it up
>Ends up making me feel even worse for not being able to man up

File: beachyhead.png (2MB, 1481x834px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 1481x834px

death could be beautiful and romantic, you just have to pick a great scenery for your final exit

>>38768226
all day every day yep

File: pepebed.jpg (32KB, 500x421px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 500x421px

>>38768226
Only when I go to bed at night, I manage to stave off most shit during the day but at night when all is quite, my depression hits me like a fucking train and I cry myself to sleep.

File: 1501225698978.jpg (56KB, 348x469px) Image search: [Google]

56KB, 348x469px

>>38774319
naw leave the jooooos outta dis nigger

File: BigRed.png (522KB, 531x509px) Image search: [Google]

522KB, 531x509px

>>38776106
Sounds like your sister and mom are sexist assholes.

>had a really bad cough for 2 weeks
>secretly hopes its some form of cancer
>fantasize about using the last of my savings to go somewhere secluded like in the forest
>fantasize about enjoying nature and being at peace
>fantasize dying under the stars around nature and shiiet
>turns out just to be a normal throat infection
thats how much I want it. I'll probably do it before summer ends. Just waiting for the right time. Then I can have my eternal slumber.

>>38768226
all the time from the moment i wake up to the moment i go to sleep

>>38768226
Lately, every day. Haven't been suicidal in 10 years, so is nostalgie and comf

Everyday since I was 12. I had a pretty bad accident that left me with a disfigured leg. I was an autismo before and that accident basically sealed my fate as a social outcast. The bullying and social rejection was really bad and coupled with the fact that my parents viewed me like some kind of leper utterly ruined any kind of normal mental development I could've had. If I was born in a western country and had the same fate I might've turn out normal. But I'm from a third world country and the mentality they have on the disabled is bigoted at best. I'm still trying my best to keep myself from an hero. Reading books and novels really helps me.

anytime i make a mistake, depending on seriousness... but only for those good 10 mins until i calm down, and continue just feeling generally miserable

>>38768226
i thought of it once or twice and considered it a waste, ive suffered for so long already the most i deserve is to suffer the rest.