The most beta thing you've done

>>38735436
That's pathetic. I think the most beta thing I ever did was not ask out my crush in high school. She had a boyfriend but later confessed she wanted my cock anyway lol

Made me a better person. Went on to cuck two guys and steal a girl from a third. Worked out well in the end

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>>38735436
>be best friend's birthday
>best friend is a girl
>have a crush on her
>give her flowers
>expect a kiss or smth
>get a hug
That killed me on the inside. Plus I came earlier than other people just to be alone with her ;_;

>>38735597
She was your best friend. What were you expecting?

>chosen for flag carrier for my school, no idea how since im a total autist with shit grades
>probably because they knew i was among the only ones dumb enough to say yes
>2 girls are supposed to walk next to you while you carry the flag
>i'm 5'6
>one of them is 5'8 and the other is 5'10 ish
>"shouldn't we find someone taller?"
>"heheh, y-yeah, t-thats what i was thinking. haha"
>they werent even joking, they were 100% embarrassed
>all of this happens in front of my crush

>>38735622
I was expecting something because everyone thought of us as a couple, but not her.

>>38735738
That must hurt. Don't know the feeling though since I'm not a manlet.

>>38735597
that doesn't seem so unreasonable.
did you ever tell her you liked her?

>>38735758
Since when has what everyone else thought mattered? Do you have autism dude?

>>38735801
I haven't, that's why it's the most beta thing I've ever done.
>>38735806
It mattered to me at least. I don't have autism, at least not yet.

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>Apologize to a girl for being ugly in middle school.

>Spending around 100$ worth of tokens on Chaturbate and MFC to tickle camwhore pussy.

>>38735870
The first one is kinda ok since you were in middle school but the second one, why don't you watch normal porn?

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>>38735436
>Black girl has crush on me
>Not interested
>In gym class one day she calls Tyrone over and kisses him in front of me while staring at me
>Obviously trying to make me jelly
>Dunno what to do so I just sort've stand there awkwardly

Her plan backfired, that just confirmed my opinion she was a trashy whore

>>38735931
being able to get off to normal porn is a fucking gift, i wish i wasnt into super niche shit

>>38736015
That's not beta, you were just awkwardly showing her that you don't care.

>>38736078
Doing anything awkwardly is beta desu

>>38736078
Well I was getting gunk out of my eye at the time and later on she was like "Tyrone said you were crying!" and I had no answer that didn't sound like I was going "NUH UHHH"

>>38736224
"I wasn't but ok"

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>>38736240
Hang urself you passive aggressive faggot

That's 14 year old girl tier

Just stop being a retard and don't go

>>38736363
how is that in any way passive aggressive? it's dismissive, because you should be if someone if trying to make you jealous when you don't care.

>>38735835
well tell her now!
oregano

>anyone tells me to do anything
>99.999% chance i do it
My entire childhood right there. I was created to take orders.

> semester long group project
> I'm one of the left overs consisting of rejects and delinquents
> we form last group
> not just group of loners and autists
> all are known failure students
> I don't want to fail too
> carry books and bags in exchange for joining another group
> gave $20 to one of the girls too
> she would ask for pocket change through out the year which I obliged

I passed the class and the reject group never started the project.

>>38736548
It's the "but ok" that makes it passive aggressive, it makes you sound salty. Try to imagine the girl's reaction to "I wasn't" and "I wasn't but ok".

>>38736631
I've been thinking about it, but now she is on vacation and won't be back until late august. If I mess our friendship up, I should at least do it in person.

>>38735436
I cried about killing not just the men, but the women, and the children too. I enjoyed it.

>girlfriend goes to camp as a camp counselor
>buy her ~$300 phone so we can keep in touch
>she uses it to start her relations with a subervisor

>>38736696
>anyone tells me to do anything
>99.999% chance i DON'T do it
I am very disagreeable, but I guess it's better than being a pushover.

>>38735490
Mitch is that you? Fight me 1v1 on Rust

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>>38735436
>talk to girl on msn
>first thing I say is
>"Honestly, do I have any chance with you"
>Says no
>never talk to girls again

>>38737111
Nope but I'd 1v1 you on Rust. I legit made a dude cry on Rust once. It was one of the most awkward things I've ever had to witness/hear.

>>38736818
lol not him but no it doesn't retard. shows you don't give a literal shit whether she believes you or not

>>38737050
Sounds like you two needed a counsellor.

>>38737138

Alpha as fuck senpai

Original comment

>>38737324
>talk to a girl on an instant messenger
>d-do I have any chance
>fuck no
>A-ALPHA AS F-FUCK! ;_;;;
Yeah bro. Very inspiring

>>38737138
I agree, this is pretty alpha. Beta would be to talk to her for months before revealing your feelings, and then talk to her for years after she rejects you.

>>38737376
>get rejected by girl you've never spoken to
>never talk to girls ever again
>S-SO ALPHA!
Are the robots here so pathetic that this is their standard for being alpha? lmao

>>38735436

Let a girl I met on okc peg my ass like 4 years ago

It was hot but more Jesus it was beta as fuck

>>38737353

At least he just asked straight up instead of beating around the bush and becoming a beta orbiter

>>38737433

>are robots so pathetic....

Yes

>>38737441
How did it happen? I would love to be in your shoes.

>>38737481
Doing one bitch ass thing instead of another isn't any better bro.

>>38737508
Oh okay. Thanks for clearing that up mate

>>38735490
You are a sack of shit, fuck you

>>38737646
Why am I a sack of shit anon? What's wrong with my post?

>>38737524

>talk with her a bit online
>she's a thicc mixed race white and black girl
>things get sexual
>she's dominant sexually
>big ol boner.jpeg
>go on a date
>get dinner
>go to Adam and eve (adult bookstore)
>she makes me buy a strapon with her money
>go back to my place
>in my room
>start making out
>get naked and stuff
>she pushes me down face first into the bed
>she takes out the strapon and lubes it on and penetrates me with her on top of me
>fucks me for like 20 minutes
>feels good man
>ejac
>???
>never call her again

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>>38735436
>Get conscripted in the army
>People keep thinking I'm retarded
>Start playing retarded
>Shit gets worse and worse as times goes by
>Just wanna be left alone through bootcamp but people won't leave me alone
Literally Beta among alphas

>>38737778
>talk with her a bit online

But how did the strapon stuff come out so quickly? How long did you two talk? Were you looking for dominant women or it just randomly happened?

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>>38735436

>sophomore in highschool
>2008-2009
>get girls phone number from one of her friends
>text her all the time
>if she doesn't reply back I resend the message
>don't talk to her verbally despite having a couple classes with her

The first time someone called me a faggot on 4chan I got a little teary-eyed. I couldn't understand why anyone would be that mean to a stranger.

>>38737990
>don't talk to her verbally despite having a couple classes with her
Not sure if beta or autistic

>>38737893
Nigga, if you're not talking about sex within the first hour or two you've fucked up and are relegated to being her gay friend.

>>38737893

When our conversations got sexual she said she's more dominant and I asked her if she ever fantasized about pegging a guy and she said yes and I said we should try it

We talked for like 2 months or so

>>38738114
Nice thanks, that gives me some interesting insight.

>>38738157

If you're not talking about sex on a dating website you're doing it wrong. Tinder, okcupid, plenty of fish etc are hookup sites plain and simple desu

>>38738248
Don't bother. He's going to be chasing ugly bitches to fuck his ass and even they won't want to go near him lol

>>38738248
I mean I can understand on tinder and other hookup apps but I always though okcupid was more about finding long term relationships.

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>>38738368

That's it's intent yes but people use it for hooking up.

It's like omegle; everyone uses it for cybersex/camwhoring/etc but it's there to "talk to strangers and make friends"

>>38738480
That's the shittiest titjob I've ever seen

>>38737778
>never call her again
>>38738114
>We talked for like 2 months or so

This will seem like a major point of failure in a few years. Knowing you missed out on being the slave of a dominant woman like that.

>>38738530

Don't remind me anon-senpai


;_;7

>>38738508
can't get a titjob when you had none to begin with

>>38738584
Are you suggesting that you think those are real?

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I kissed my ex-oneitis on the hand like they do in cartoons.

>>38738480
Pretty decent looking trap desoo

>>38738749

Did you tip your fedora and say "good evening m'lady" before kissing her hand

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>>38735436
>I always try to become friends before thinking on dating on any sort of relationship no matter how much I am attracted to them physically
>only consider dating women I respect
>Dont feel comfortable filtering
>See every girl that I liked to get in with other while I was friends, hurt a lot the times when I though we had hit off and we could be more than friend
>Girl I liked was hurt by me not making a move and kiss random guy to get me jelly next day
>Hurt like hell, ignore her
>She has a meltdown because she likes and can't understand why I act like I do
>Tell her I liked her but not anymore and I sincerely don't understand how anyone can go and kiss others if you already have someone you like.

>>38738800
Maybe l did

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>>38735436
>middle school
>be in english class
>girl asks me out
>turn her down saying that "I wasn't ready for a relationship yet"
>asks me out again later
>turn her down again
>never approaches me again

I need someone to hold me

>>38737751
>What's wrong with my post?
You shouldn't be questioning your post, you should be questioning you LIFE, fag!

If you lived in my neighbourhood I'd punch you in the PUSSY! lil bitch

>>38739136
picarddoublefacepalm.gif

>>38739136
this is so me. why was i getting all the pussy in middleschool when women dont even want to talk to me now?

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When I was in college I paid a girl from my dorm $400 per semester to sit and watch me work in the library once a week, so I could pretend she was my sexual study buddy. I never told her the sexual part. The worst part is that I was ashamed to look her in the eyes so instead I pasted her facebook pictures in my textbooks which meant I didn't even learn in those days, which probably hurt my grades. Also she told all her friends to avoid me, and even spent some of the money I gave her on pepper spray just in case.

>>38739252
That can't be real anon


You're making it up

>>38739252
>Sexual study buddy

Wat is going on here? Were you trying to impress you friends or something?

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>>38739252
>When I was in college I paid a girl from my dorm $400 per semester to sit and watch me work in the library once a week, so I could pretend she was my sexual study buddy. I never told her the sexual part. The worst part is that I was ashamed to look her in the eyes so instead I pasted her facebook pictures in my textbooks which meant I didn't even learn in those days, which probably hurt my grades. Also she told all her friends to avoid me, and even spent some of the money I gave her on pepper spray just in case.
what did he mean by this?

>>38739252
THIS BETTER BE FAKE ANON

>>38739136
Here's another one

>still middle school
>science class
>teacher has us do some activity that required holding hands with others
>I get partnered up with two girls
>social anxiety tells me that they think I'm disgusting
>I roll down my sleeves so that way they don't have to make contact with me
>they stare awkwardly at me

there is no helping me

>>38735436
>autisic friend tells other more autistic friend about my crush
>more autistic friend fucks with me and crush
>be only person to ever get rejected by their crush without even talking to their crush
>friends drag me to her to apologize
>I usain bolt it out of there
>Eventually get guilted into writing and giving her apology letter
>never speak to her again
>Years later we are laughing about it
>Autistic friends and other friends help me realize she was a dumb slut and wasn't particularly good looking either
>get over my yellow fever
>get into 2D
All in all a pretty good deal.

>>38735738
>5'10
That's 177 fucking centimetres. I've only ever known one or two girls in my entire pre-university life who were that tall. Are Americans this bad at estimating height or are your schoolgirls legitimately giraffes?

>teacher tells stacy to sit next to me
>starts crying
>just sit there looking at the floor playing with my finger nails

>>38739252
Winner.
But even if i wanted to do something that pathetic, there is no way i would get the courage to do something like that, so i guess props to you there.

>>38735436
I've never done anything overtly beta.

I've likely lived the entirety of my existence this way though.

OP here, so exactly how beta was the event I just described?

Also just wanted to say that I appreciated all your stories.

>>38736818
>I wasn't
Liar!
>there was something in my eye
Liar!!!
>I wasn't but ok
Passive-aggressive!
>(no reply)
Beta faggot!

>>38739689
If you mean
>>38735436
Then I don't understand how it was beta at all to apologize. I have autism though so don't take my word for it.

>>38739569
I went to high school with several girls who were 5'10, and my high school only had 200 students. It's not that uncommon.

>>38735436
>decide to walk to 7/11
>get to 7/11 grab some chips and a drink then wait in line
>qt register person with dyed hair
>I get to front of the line
>"I like your hair"
>"what"
>"I-I-I like your hair"
>"oh"
>she is visibly comfortable
>pay for stuff then leave
>get home then cry in bed for a hour
>never go to 7/11 again

>>38739772
>>she is visibly comfortable
Chad get out

>>38739772
>she is visibly comfortable
uh, what

>>38739793
i think he meant to say uncomfortable.

if not: ree

>>38739821
I know it was a joke.
Not funny, I know. I'm a kraut so don't expect too much of my humour

>>38736696
Same for me, without orders i would just sit around all day not knowing what ti do.

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>>38736015
>Didn't get a black girlfriend
>Black girl never even went so far as to do this for me

>>38739860
i-i thought it was funny anon!

>>38739949
y-you too, anon

>select all images with skirts
>they're actually dresses

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Here's my beta adventure
>be 16
>be indian
>talk to white girl irl and on messenger for 3 months
>white girl was the "most good looking" girl by all of the lads
>after prom confess my feelings
>she rejects me
>feelsbadman.jpg
>literally cut myself off from my friends and become an outcast
>realise its ok because im not going back to school because im going to get an apprenticeship
>my lack of social skills lead to me getting rejected for my 30+ applications
>mfw I have to see her every single day when I'm at school

>>38740065
>be indian
stopped reading there

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The most beta thing I ever did was in interpersonal communications class and I was partnered with some 7/10 we were doing a worksheet and the last question said hold hands and do some communications shit idk. She said "let's skip that one" and I said OK

>>38740116
eh, fair enough

>>38740065
It's ok m8 this happens to every Indian American.

>>38740200
But I'm British M8

>>38740148
ree normies leave
but seriously that's the equivalent of a girl saying she's lonely because only 6/10s hit on her

>>38739797
*Uncomfortable
Originamino

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>>38735436
> be on the bus with other kids.
> they talking about jerking off. ask me how long it takes me to get off.
> Am a retarded home school kid. Didn't get taught about masturbation let alone how long it took.
> say that it takes me five seconds. The bus roars with laughter.
> known as the five second man all throughout the rest of my high school years.

>>38740224
I didn't pick her as a partner I just sat there while everyone else found a partner and when the teacher said does anyone not have a partner I raised my h and

>>38739860
WASS FUR EIN SCHLECTER WITZ ALTER HAHAHAHA LOOOSER

>>38736015
What race are you and what did she look like? Was she hot? Did the guy want/like the kiss or was it stolen?

>>38739569
In my college, most women were at least 5'7 or taller. I went to a school of around 15 thousand people, of which over 65% were women, and so it felt really strange to be surrounded by women that were taller than me.

>friends with girl
>heard through mutual friends she likes me
>one day she asks to come over and watch a movie
>say okay and arrange a day
>day comes
>meet her near school and walk back to my house talking
>get to house
>go to my room
>she lies on my bed
>I put on the movie and lie next to her
>thinking about making a move the whole movie
>don't do shit
>movie ends
>she leaves

God I'm such a pussy.

>>38738816
Women are fucking stupid and want to be treated like objects.
The first thing you should say to them is something along the lines of "Do you want me to fuck the everloving shit out of your wet cunt?" if you are looking to date them.
If not THEN you can be friends and treat them like a human maybe.

>>38740284
Lmao I started masturbating in 6th grade but didn't even know what it was called til 9th. Kids would ask if I knew how to masturbate and I would think they were talking about fishing

>>38739476
no, it's ok, you did fine

>>38740542
Other anon here, I also started masturbating without knowing it was a common thing.
I used to have this technique where you grab your dick with one hand and massage the top of it with the other, I didn't even know you could just use one hand till some friends told me years later.
I think one day I told some classmates about my technique and they misinterpreted it, thinking my massaging movement was more like brushing. This eventually lead to every girl in the class knowing that too.

>>38737441

Dom girls are rare as fuck and have their pick of the litter because of it, and she chose you. That's actually pretty badass.

>>38739569
it is not so tall for a woman's height

>>38740517
shit dude
I am very shy myself,that's that's beyond beta
was it that difficult even holding her hand?

>>38740820
I'm extremely insecure and I overthink everything.
I was basically running through scenarios where everything went wrong in my head so I was way too nervous to do anything.

>>38740378
>What race are you and what did she look like?
I'm white and she was a dark skinned nigress, not horrible looking but still pretty nig.

>Was she hot?
She had a nice body but she was rude, cheap, fickle and pulled stunts like I described so I wasn't interested and considered her a disgusting woman of loose morals.

>Did the guy want/like the kiss or was it stolen?
Stupid fuck thought he was cucking me, he looked smug as fuck and I wanted to say "I literally couldn't care less you subhuman ape, enjoy your whore".

>>38739136
>14
>Out with friends
>Everyone is passing around a big 2 litre bottle of soda with vodka mixed in
>Probably not much and just kids pretending to be drunker than they are
>I refuse to take any
>Play some game where everyone is trying to make out with as many people as possible (theres like a huge gathering of 30 kids there)
>I turn down everyone that approaches me because I'm too shy
>Now 24 and haven't had any opportunity since

I'm now terrified of intimacy and afraid of kissing anyone in case they immediately realise I've never kissed before.

>>38740517
yeah, i fear this happening to me. i'm just afraid of going for a move and the girl not being comfortable. especially when going for something risky, like touching her thigh. not only that, but knowing when she wants to kiss or fuck. it's all a dangerous guessing game.

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I went to a strip club with my boss when he went
>DURRR YOU'VE NEVER SEEN TITTIES IN REAL LIFE BEFORE???

We got really drunk, and I'm pretty sure I tipped the stripper that gave HIM a lapdance.

>mfw remembering that the next morning

>>38741040
I don't follow

ori

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>>38741040
>We got really drunk, and I'm pretty sure I tipped the stripper that gave HIM a lapdance.
My sides

>>38740915
i think in times like this the girl should make the first move
I mean,if she is interested,of course

>>38740542
In middle school we all pretended we didn't jerk off and made fun of one kid who admitted he did. Later in highschool we all pretended to hate hentai and think it was disgusting to like such a thing and after highschool we were all on the hentai train.

>>38741112
>>38741019
I knew she was interested, that's the worst part. Prior to this when we were all hanging out at a friends house me and another friend went to another room and she texted me saying "when you get your braces off i want to make out with you" or something like that.
I was just too much of a bitch to make the first move.

I have another pretty beta story of when her friend straight up messaged me asking to make out if you want that story.

>both 14
>she already had big boobs at that time
>presses my hands on her tits
>tell her i respect her and it is still a bit early for sexual intersections
>she agrees but secretly wants me to fuck her
>me recognizing this shit but still don't want to rush
>brokes up with me

i regret this shit for 6 years now, she still acts a whore

>>38741329
had something similar happen and didn't fuck her either and i regret it nearly everyday

>>38738088
>The first time someone called me a faggot on 4chan I got a little teary-eyed
Kek, when was this faggot?

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>>38739252
Pls tell us that we are not the only ones to know because you deserve to be mocked by people that know you personally.

>>38739759
>>38740438
>>38740717
Jeez, looks like I got lucky. I can't imagine having to live in a country where all the girls are taller than me.
Either that or you guys really are shit at estimating height.

>>38741622
Speak for yourself. I don't mind girls that are slightly taller than me. a full head taller might be weird at first but not something I can't get over
i am a 5'9 manlet

>>38741428
>>38741329
I regret not running around in the streets when I was 17

>>38741258
>I have another pretty beta story of when her friend straight up messaged me asking to make out if you want that story.

go on

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Can't think of the "most beta" thing I've done in particular so here's a shortlist.

>breaking down in tears in front of whole class because of namecalling
>physically push away a girl who tried to kiss me because too anxious, blame it on her bad breath
>run away from most fights
>make youtube videos, delete channel due to negative comments

>>38741622
I'm not estimating height, I'm 5'8 and these women are consistently at my height or taller

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>>38736990
Underrated post, thanks for the heart chuckle anon

>>38741765
>make youtube videos, delete channel due to negative comments


master kek

>>38738090
Don't the two go hand in hand?

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>>38739689
It's not beta, just really Canadian of you.

>>38740065
>be Indian
Go home, Pajeet.

>>38741731
Alright. This is more embarrassing than beta but I guess it's still a little beta.

>girl messages me asking to make out
>I'm confused and shocked but I agree because she's kinda cute and why the fuck not
>she also wants to smoke some weed with me and I always have some so I agree
>day comes to do it, meet up with her walk back to mine
>get to my room and start chopping the weed
>making smalltalk but in the back of my mind I'm thinking shit how do we even get to the kissing part?
>smoke a cone
>give her one, she coughs and I laugh
>there's a bit of awkward silence then I think fuck it
>ask "so do you want to make out?"
>she nods, smiles then suddenly she's kissing me
>well shit that was easy
>we end up on the bed making out
>no clue wtf I'm doing but enjoying it anyway
>after a while she asks me if I've done this before and I say no not really and she says I'm good at kissing
>fuck yes confidence restored
>make out for a while longer
>she takes her shirt off
>oh fuck yes
>moves my hands to her bra
>oh shit
>no idea how to undo it
>laugh and say I don't know what im doing
>she's not too bothered though and takes it off herself
>see her tits
>notbad.jpg
>soft as fuck and little pink nipples
>go to town on them, licking the nipples every which way, shit is cash
>we make out I lick her nipples kiss her body etc. for an hour or so
Up until now I was pretty alpha but here's where it gets embarrassing and beta
>we're making out, her ontop of me
>she starts to move down
>internally excited as fuck but also nervous
>she pulls down my pants
>tfw I'm soft from years of porn and rough masturbation
>I've been rendered useless
>she grabs my dick and tugs on it
>has no idea what she's doing so there's no hope of me getting hard
>she then puts her mouth on the tip for a second then stops
>I think my dick tasted bad or something even though I showered and washed it
>nervous as fuck now
>she starts kissing me again
shit this is longer than I thought, cont.

>>38742246
Hurry the fuck up. This cock can't stay erect all day.

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>>38741329
"sexual intersections"

>>38742320
Eating some food. It's all downhill from here so don't expect much fap material.

>she gets up to go to the bathroom
>I think this happened earlier actually but whatever
>she gets locked in there because the door's kind of fucked
>later find out that she called a friend when she was in there
>don't know much about the convo but I assume the worst
>it also turns out she had never smoked weed before so she must have been fucked up this whole time
>I let her out of the bathroom then she comes back into my room and, well since this is out of order I'll get back to where I was before
>we make out for a little longer
>then it stops and there's a few awkward pauses
>we're both sitting up and my limp dick's just hanging out there
>don't want to put it away for some reason, I thought it would be awkward
>ask what she wants to do
>she asks what I want to do
>say "I don't know, fuck"
>mfw a split second after I say it i realise fuck has two meanings
>I meant it as the exclamatory fuck not fuck fuck
>she says no
>I'm actually kind of glad but I feel awkward still
>we just kind of leave it there then she and I get dressed and I walk her to the bus stop
a week or so later
>at her friend's house (our group of stoners get stoned there a lot)
>all smoking in the backyard
>she's there too
>somehow I found out she's been telling people she sucked my dick
>kind of annoyed because the tip for 1 second doesn't count
>get in an argument with her
>people can hear us
>she says out loud that she did suck my dick and it was an awful experience
>feeling like shit
>there are other girls around
>realise that she's probably been talking shit about me to all the girls
>my chances with any of them are ruined
>eventually just get frustrated and go smoke more and ignore her
>think fuck this lying bitch

This is how I learned never to trust a ho.

>>38735436
>be 16
>at a boarding school
>Christmas social/disco
>am only person there actually dancing. All he Chads and Staceys are just talking and drinking
>qt comes up to dance with me
>wtf.png
>glance at her and she is imitating my autistic dance movements
>she's actually dancing with me on purpose
>instead of turning and talking to her I get scared and look straight ahead away from her
>she tries to engage with me but I keep on dancing ignoring her out of fear I would do something wrong
>she stays for ages trying to talk/dance with me
>continue to not react
>she eventually gets bored and walks off
>found out later that week that she was on the rebound from a breakup with her ex and had a thing for me
>I think about her everyday now

>>38742246
>>38742572
Deserves you right when you were trying to intoxicate an inexperienced girl because you wanted to fuck her. May she should have reported you for attempted rape.

>>38735436
Not a lot of things because I rarely interact with women
But one time in a 9th grade a girl asked to see my cock because she quipped "friend of hers wanted her to say that to me"
Not realizing she made a move on me, I replied "well then your friend can tell that to me himself"

>>38742672
I know this is bait but I'll respond anyway.

A. She mentioned weed
B. She lied and said she had smoked before
C. She asked me to make out
D. I was less experienced than her, we were also the same age
E. I think you means serves, not deserves

>>38742572
not so fucked up as I expected,anon
at least you have had more moves than I ever dream to have

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>>38742246
I wish I could kiss someone

>>38742729
You should have been able to tell that something is off. No women on earth would ask if she can smoke and make out with you.

>>38735436
I can never decipher how robots post, they're too autistic

>>38741008
happened to me too, fortunately i now see it as a blessing because who fucking knows where the modern women's mouth has been

not kissing anyone I'm not cohabiting with at the very least

>>38742747
Maybe, but to me it was devastating. I was finally about to get a bj and I get fucking limp dickitis.
It also made me really paranoid about what rumours she spread or if she legitimately did believe what she was saying because it was her first time stoned. Another annoying thing is she probably told people I have a small dick since it was soft even though I've got a 7.5 incher. So there went that opportunity of being the guy with the big dick that girls might want to "try".
The whole thing was just a mess and left me extremely distrustful of women.

>>38742812
I won't lie, it's pretty nice. But it's like jerking off with toys and lube and all sorts of shit, the mess afterwards sucks.

>>38742822
I was a naive 16 year old. I've learned that now, but I learned the hard way.

>apologizing for punching a girl

>>38742907
keep on trying

>>38742907
>but I learned the hard way
No you didn't. You ruined your chance with her friends, so what? Be glad that she hasn't destroyed your life because you tried to rape her.

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>>38742246
>>38742572
How is any of that beta shit?
>durr hurr I made out with a girl one time while stoned but watched too much porn so I was limp the whole time
Get the fuck out you failed normie faggot retard stoner.

>>38742957
Trying to get girls?

>>38742962
Maybe not the hard, hard way, sure. But in my 16 year old head this was crushing. Especially since it my first experience like this.

>>38743012
I said it was more embarrassing than beta.

>>38735490
That's like getting molested and raped by your dad, then doing the same thing to your son

>>38735490
You're a piece of shit, you don't go for another man's slut, you tell him she's a no good slut

>>38737068
In my opinion, being susceptible to peer pressure is beta, keep up the alpha behavior

>middle school
>have crush on a girl that nobody else has a crush on
>I offer a friend a cosmic brownie to ask this girl to go out with me
>hear back 4 days later saying she isn't interested

I don't even know what going out is/was so I'm not sure what I would have done had she said yes anyway. i don't think she would have said yes even if I had asked myself, but at least I could have gone down with some dignity rather than being a coward about it

>>38736696
Iktfb. It's ingrained in my personality at this point I have a hard time doing things on my own without being told

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>>38735870
yeah you need to fix your life lol

>be 17
>have two friends
>one friend is a football player faux Chad who everyone likes to hang around with but girls won't talk to for any reason other than "just friends"
>he throws a party while parents are on vacation and invites me
>don't drink
>don't smoke
>don't talk to anyone new
>sit on the couch and watch NFL network until 2 AM eating Cheerios
>fall asleep
>wake up next morning
>few people left at the house
>friend says we should all get breakfast
>only have $2
>hot girl who stayed the night says she's not going but she wants her bag from her car
>I immediately offer to go get it for her
>she says okay and I come back with her bag
>ask her for a dollar so I can buy a short stack at the diner
>she reluctantly hands over a dollar and says her goodbyes to everybody
>still didn't have enough money for pancakes

>>38740284
Honestly, not the worst answer. I give sarcastic answers to stupid questions all the time.

>>38743800
>she reluctantly hands over a dollar and says her goodbyes to everybody
kek. fucking jew bitch

>>38735436
Browsing r9k
Lanigiro

>14
>walking home from friends house
>see two girls and a guy about my age
>one of the girls waves and says "hey"
>I stutter out a "th-thank you" and throw her a thumbs up
>keep walking

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>>38735436
Gave my oneitis relationship advice to help him with another girl. He's my good friend so I helped him out, and I'm glad he's happy with someone even if it isn't me.

>>38743800
A+ for manipulation there buddy

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>>38744202
>I stutter out a "th-thank you" and throw her a thumbs up
Anon....

>>38738816
No, there's nothing wrong with you, you're a saint in this corrupted society, keep it up

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>>38741136
I actually was that one kid who said he masturbated. Yeah everybody laughed and pretended it was something forigen now that I think about it I wasnt some nerd who couldn't get pussy I was a real nigga

>>38744306
Wait, are you a gay guy or just a """"""""""""fembot"""""""""""?

>>38739569
Women above 170 are very common in Europe.

Being 5'6 is actually rather rare, I think the shortest guy at my high school was 5'6 and he got comments about it. But in America you have all kinds of ethnicities so it varies.

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>>38743671
Ha when I was in 10th grade I used to give this fat kid PSP games to ask girls out for me

>>38736363
chaddisapproves.jpeg

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>>38735436
>at highschool
>valentines day
>give girl I like one of those chocolates that you're supposed to split in half and eat together
>she grabs it and take a big bite out of it, eats one whole bit and a half of the other in one chomp
>"enjoy it"

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>>38744711
"""""""""""""""Fembot"""""""""""""""""
Inb4 trap, roastie, and/or "be my gf". If it makes you 'reeeeeee' less, you can pretend I'm a fag.

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>>38744857
I'm angry at you and I'm angry at your posts. If this is bait, you should feel proud. You're doing well.

>>38735597
Phillip is that you?

I orbited my oneitis for 6 months

>>38735436

>16 in high school
>be very lucky one day and manage to get a girlfriend
>we date for 3 months, never kiss
>always too nervous i'll fuck up and embarrass myself
>afterwards i realise i embarrassed myself by not doing this

and im still a robot, i was only lucky to get a girlfriend.

>in town in nor cal
>hear this construction worker say "i stuck it in her ass and she was like durr"

>>38735490
Pretty solid bait friendo.
Fell for it at first.
A strong 7.5/10

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>>38744202
ALPHA MOVES MY DUDE

>>38737433
Eh I respect dudes who just realize they can't get a girl and quit trying. A lot of the time it is out of desperation so much it will never work anyways.

Sorta goes for me to. I quit trying now I just want to be worth a million by the time I'm twenty (it's going very well by the way) and have an amazing body.

I have my own interests and things that satisfy me outside of slapping flesh.

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>be 15
>it's lunchtime in school
>my friend tells me some good porn sites i had to write down in paper
>can't find the pen
>my friend doesn't have it also so search for a pen in a girl's bag i know
>keep searching find some tampons.gotta mention here that i didn't know what periods were and what tampons were
>hold on to those and eventually find a pen , write that shit down.
>lunch is over and the girl comes in with her friends. i ask her "hey what kind of pen is this? i tried writing with them but couldn't" holding up her tampons
>she is bawling right now and her friends are consoling her
>whatinthefuckJustHappened.gif
>MFW principal calls me and my parents and i get admitted to rehab for abusive behaviour for next 3 months in our school hospital.

>>38739569
>Are Americans this bad at estimating height or are your schoolgirls legitimately giraffes?
Anon, i went to school with girls who were 6ft, because I'm 6ft. They were unironically volleyball players, I had the biggest crush on them.

>freind punchs me in mouth for no reason while I was spaced out
>bends my front tooth out of place perma
>he was complaining about the pain of hitting my tooth with his fist
>I was concerned for his pain

Ooh good, this thread.
>Be me, tall athletic, blond etc
>Still a sperg, though women approach me constantly
>At hotel for business travel
>Very quiet, homey atmosphere bed and breakfast
>Wake and bake, blueberry kush
>High as fuk 7am go down to breakfast
>Oh shit, 2 10/10s only other people in dining room
>Notice them mirin' I freeze.
>Start spreading jam all over untoasred bread, quickly throw ham and cheese on jam Danny
>Notice hotter 10/10 watching my jam-ham-cheese ordeal.
>I'm stoned, in complete wah-wah-wah-wah-wah outer space
>Nearly yell, "GOOD MORNING!"
>Realize she's 3 feet away
>Says "good morning" back in normal voice and looks away fast
>I burst out laughing cause high
>Make a tea (I don't drink tea)
>Bring tea and jam-ham-cheese to table.
>Can't stop giggling
>Hotties leave

>>38746211
that's honestly hilarous

>>38735490
GO BACK TO NORMIEVILLE FUCK YOU

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>>38746388

tell me about it. nothing funny then when the school hospital was right inside the school and everyone would try to look at me from outside . mostly girls pointing at me and commenting "look there's that fucking creep ewwww"
>MFW still cringe at that moment to this day uggghhh

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>girl has anime background on her phone
>mention that i've watched that anime before
>she asks me who my favorite character is (pic related)
>she starts laughing at me when i reply
>spaghetti flowing out of pockets
>sweating like a beta bitch
>she's in tears at this point
>i beg her not to tell anyone i watch it
>she nods solemnly and stops laughing about a century later.
i wish i weren't one of you faggogs

>>38738816
you're a good soul man, better than me
keep being a good dude

>>38739569
pure idiocy

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>>38739136
This is me.
>be me
> 2006-07 middle school
>go on a school trip
> got a required partner to sit next to me
>ohshit.jpg a girl
>happens to talk a lot to me I barely talk to her
> seems interested in talking to me
> i get bored so I actually start listening to her stories
> she eventually asks me if I ever had a girlfriend
> I said no
> she asks if I would want one
>start thinking to myself
> "wtf a girl is asking me out! That should be me asking her out instead!"
> get nervous at the same time
> be me and say no
I'm 22, and I've had no luck ever since. Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and have a relationship with her.
> be me never even kissed a girl
> even worse never had a relationship
> could have had kissed a girl and relationship
I really fucked up anons.

>>38746478
it was a small mistake, anon. dont feel bad about it.
it's over now

>>38746384
Fuck off Chad. Your so called "beta" story is a feeble attempt to be a robot but I can see through your deception.

>>38743800
not beta just funny tbqh

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>get text from oneitis
>Anon wanna watch 4th of July fireworks and you can just stay over my place tonight?
>aww yes.jpg
>get there hang out
>oneitis on again off again bf shows
>mfw I end up sleeping on the couch while I can hear the bed creaking upstairs in their room.

It was my junior year in high school, there was a pretty cute girl that sat by herself for a week, so I sat next to her and we sat next to each other for the whole year just by ourselves. i asked her if she wanted to hang out a couple weeks later, she said she was busy, I kept asking for the next month and she always said she was busy, and I sat next to her for the rest of the year and I asked her off and on but never said yes once.

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>>38741040
>DURRR YOU'VE NEVER SEEN TITTIES IN REAL LIFE BEFORE???

>>38737050

>>38737283

most underrated post of the night

>>38740019
>select all images with vehicles
>it doesn't include the bits that stick out into other squares
WELL WHATS THE FUCKING POINT

>be me
>8-9 years old
>hanging out with this girl named Amanda
>she asks if I'll be her boyfriend
>sure
>we go to a house that's being built
>she jumps up and hangs off of something like monkey bars
>tries to get on my back
>falls and lands ass first in dirty water
>I say "SORRY"
>she no longer wants to be my girlfriend
I think that relationship lasted less than an hour and sadly it set the tone for every attempt at a romantic relationship I'd ever have with a woman.

>>38747198
not him, but I'm 33 KHV and i'm still waiting my turn kek

>>38736726
Doesn't sound very beta. Sounds like you were being resourceful.

>>38745995
That's a nor Cal expression for she loved it.

>>38735436
>be me junior year
>basically a fucking mute
>twitchy all the time with anxiety, can barely function around people
>mom sets me up with a date with her friend's daughter
>go to movies with girl
>first time ever on a date, anxious as fuck
>meet her there and say hi
>she's very sweet and ushers me inside
>just think she pities me and is just doing this because she's forced to (she basically was)
>20 minutes into the movie, sweating like a fucking madman
>she wants to hold my hand
>position body to make the least amount of physical contact possible while doing this
>leans over onto me
>noticeably jump
>almost push her off me
>sit in absolute horror until the movie ends, occasionally eating some popcorn
>"that was fun anon how do you feel"
>vomit, everywhere, on everything
>give a garbled "sorry fuck shit"
>she's backing up, disgusted
>just run out the door and book it the 7 miles home
I'm drenched in sweat from writing this

>>38743454
>beta males think this is the right thing to do
nah bro. it's better to get your rocks off and have him find out the hard way.

>>38735870
Ahahahahaha you spent money on that ahahahaha lmaoing at your fucking life.

>>38735436
>Befriend brown qt in bio class
>talk to her over summer
>we're into a lot of the same shit
>find out she's a cutter
>make her stop, bring her back from the brink
>never work up the guts to ask her to even hang out
>a week after she says she's better she completely cuts contact with me because "I don't need you anymore".

I'm not a fucking emotional tampon.

>>38745607
He hasn't responded so I think it is him, if you're the normie who tracked him down on here "believe me I know it happens I've had a few come looking for me" you could at least tell him you're sorry, before he try's to kill himself or something else bad happens to him, even an Anonymous reply could make him feel better, you could even prove it really is you.

>>38746580
I know that feel my man..
Origami

>>38740631
cutfags, not even once
Somewhat surprisingly unoriginal

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>>38735436
>held the door open for 17 people
>too beta to let it close

>>38740631
When I was 11 I had this technique where I would lightly tickle the underside of my dong where the head meets the shaft with all my fingers. I remember thinking jiz was blood the first time it happened cos I was too scared to turn the light on

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>>38739181
Said the fat virgin living in his basement

>>38746580
Feels like this are the worst. How can life be so cruel that we only had one chance and we fuck it up and then no chance ever again?

>>38747375
you should be a writer

>>38739860
Wir haben leider keine Seven-Elevens in Deutschland, Genosse

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I have a few but this is the most recent one.
>be me, with some friends at book and comic convention
>I wander off and end up in the middle of the Harry Potter section
>I recently picked up the habit of saying thoughts out loud, surprisingly useful to start up conversations with strangers
>say "Man I hate Harry Potter"
>8/10 turns around and playfuly says "Well I like it"
>"m-me too"
From there the conversation goes on and I'm doing really well, we talk about various topics and she genuenly seems to enjoy talking to me
>friends see me from far away and signal me to come to them, but then see the girl and give me some encouraging looks
>the conversation is starting to close up, my inner turbosperg is being held so far
>"hey anon, I really liked talking to you, would you like to exchange numbers so we can date sometime maybe?"
>that's it
>i can't take this anymore
>spaghetti starts falling
>"haha nice one" fist bump her, turn around and walk away
I still think about her.

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>>38739136
>8th grade
>sitting next to my friends during lunch when the girl I liked sits down right next to me
>oh shit, tense up but try to play it cool
>out of nowhere suddenly she looks me in the eyes and tells me she likes me with the sweetest smile I have ever seen
>couldn't believe what I was hearing
>felt like a bomb going off in my chest, didn't know how to respond
>"ok"
>she looks at me funny and I'm kind of just staring at her
>shit gets awkward real fast
>I turn back around and pretend to go back to the conversation I was having
>from her perspective it looked like I just brushed her off
>mfw she left me alone after that

My one chance at teen love and I fucking ruined it.

>>38750593
>tfw you are actually a chad on the inside

>>38750593
I went to a con very recently and I was hoping and praying for something like this to happen to me. I wish I could hate you to death.

>>38750673
>i wish i could hate you to death
Why?

>my childhood friend always seemed to be interested in me and actually talked to me
>other girls were terrified of me or just didn't want to deal with me
>still manage to decide to ""fall in love"" with her Stacy sister
>Stacy of course rejects me and causes all of our friends to hate me
>they both move away
>to this day I barely talk to women
>1 month since I've talked to a grill online
>3 months since I've talked to a grill irl
It's like George foreman has cursed me after I've made a huge mistake going for a Stacy.

I pray for a second chance anons

>>38750824
>1 month since I've talked to a grill online
>3 months since I've talked to a grill irl

Oh you poor thing.

>>38748957
Wow and I thought I was autistic

>>38735436
>be in high school
>really like girl
>send her one of those shit $1 carnations they sell with a note
>can't think of what to write
>are you an archaeologist?
>send it
>immediate regret and shame forever
>fast forward like 3 years
>just got home from School of Infantry East as a Marine reservist
>drinking with her and hanging out because friends
>have had a succession of shitty relationships since then
>she tells me she actually wanted to go out with me back then and I didn't make a move because beta
>has boyfriend now
>they're happy and I'm happy for them they're good together
>tfw could've been happy
>tfw now I browse a Cantonese fletching forum

>>38750864
IF it weren't thanks to my one autistic friend those metrics would be multiplied by a huge number, pal. I'd say a year on the online side and probably 6 months with irl.

What are you at pal?

>highschool
>got a crush on this qt asian girl
>we talk
>hey, so do you want to go to a party this weekend?
>sure, anon!
>arrive at party
>she arrives 30 min later
>oh boy here we go
>talk for a bit
>go get some drinks, talk to some friends
>decide to go talk to her
>she's talking to this friend of hers
>they're getting a little too close for my taste
>too beta to intervene in some way
>too beta to express my feelings, pretend I don't care
>15 min passes
>I turn around
>oh shit they're making out
>every minute of it it gets more intense
>I try to brush it off, but can't help but to look at it every 15 seconds
>party continues, getting kinda late
>most people leave, she stays with some friends
>end up making out with her
>literally second option
>end up falling in love with her anyway
>end up dating her for 3 months
>I'm quite sure she cheated on me at least 2 times during our dating time

Fuck, I don't know what I had in the head to withstand being a second option to another guy. I probably swallowed some of his saliva, too.

>>38750980
I haven't interacted with a female on a casual level since highschool. That's about 4 years.

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>>38735436
>Be me in High School year 7
>Tell asshole 'friend' I had a crush on a girl
>Asshole 'friend' goes and tells crush
>Next lesson our whole class is moving into the GYM hall
>Crush and her friends literally insult me for about 5 minutes
>Whole class is laughing ecstatically
>Crush literally says "I wouldn't go out with you if you were the last person on earth, kill yourself"
>This happened almost 10 years ago but I remember it like it was yesterday
>I took all of the abuse and said nothing
>Asshole 'friend' beat the living shit out of me a year later and stole my wallet.

Have been an extremely bitter and angry person since. If somebody did that to me today I would fucking kill them.

>>38735436
>be me
>have a crush on a girl
>the crush is strong, lasts throughout middle and high school
>she doesn't know shit
>I never attempt even talking to her

Now that at 26 I finally learned what a crignelord I am, man good think I didn't get any chance to attempt making ANY move

>>38752507
go slash your former crush's tires

>>38739569
I'm 187 and i walk past girls who are almost as tall as me all the time at university

>>38753154
That's a lie.

Go fuck yourself

>>38747198
I love this meme, it gets me hard as fuck

>>38742822
Holy shit you massive faggot. Is the most beta thing you did white-knight some random whore in a story on r9k? Pathetic fuck kill yourself

Don't worry this kind of stuff happens to the best of us

Forget that mess, make today count Anon, I believe in you

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Reading these makes me feel a bit better that people think they are autistic as fuck, but will never have to know the depths to which I have gone. (If you couldn't tell fucking read this shit I just wrote. That alone was autistic as fuck).

I've done things that would fucking kill me to type out. I will if anyone is interested but thread seems dead.

>>38753378
I'm interested let's hear it

>>38752567
>Now that at 26 I finally learned what a crignelord I am, man good think I didn't get any chance to attempt making ANY move

>cringlelord
this sounds a lot like me

in the last episode i had a gf but i slowly fell out of love as i fell into insane cringefest with another girl that didnt like me

im 100% done with this shit now

>>38753414
Well fuck. Ok I'll give it a shot.

1)
>first grade
>know nothing about sex / sexual desires
>sit near qt3.14 (At the time, not a pedo)
>have weird thoughts
>ask her a question
>"Can I have your skin when you die?"
>being so beta you can't even have the other person be alive
>like a fucking autistic serial killer
>vaguely remember parents getting called in for that one, interrogated, counseling
>that girl was with me through all of elementary/middle/high school
>I can only imagine how much that might have fucked her up
>Hate myself

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>>38753161
Hey man relax. I'm telling the truth, i'm taller than basically all of them, but i would say there are heaps who are close to 6 foot. 5'10 is tall but not that unusual

>>38753508
you mean with dating?

>>38753509
2)
>be downstairs in basement
>whole family over, multiple cousins, grandparents
>be very young (10ish?)
>playing computer game with other cousin
>sister and girl cousin (younger than me) off to the side
>girl cousin does something to annoy me, we fight a bit
>I get mad and sulk
>pick up a knife that was down there and fidget with it
>cousin starts getting scared and sister freaks out
>realize it looks like I was threatening her with it and about to stab her
>I'm just fucking autistic and needed to fidget with something and the knife was closest object
>sister and cousin run upstairs and tell the entire family
>I have to go up in front of grandparents, aunts, uncles, parents, and apologize
>don't even bother explaining, couldn't

>>38753553
3)
>high school
>robotics team
>at an event where teams from all over the state show up
>my friends and I are like 16
>we walk around the event
>I see a qt3.14
>stare at her awkwardly because I have never started a conversation with a girl before
>her and her friend catch on and get creeped out, walk away
>I spend at least an hour following them, trying to work up the courage to start a conversation
>they are actively avoiding me and creeped out
>I'm fucking 16 and too autistic to realize how autistic I'm being
>Eventually I lose them and give up
>doesn't hit me until far later how fucked that was

>>38753509
jesus man im so sorry

>>38753527
yeah
when i like a girl a lot she doesnt like me back
when a girl likes me she becomes mmy gf and i end up bored

i have schizoid personality disorder

i dont really NEED sex or gfs
ill just get a hooker if i ever get too horny or something

otherwise im done

>>38740517
khv here, what DO you do in this situation, how DO you initiate contact? do you just touch her thigh? where do you touch? do you ask her ''wanna fuck?'' I DONT UNDERSTAND

>>38753657
4)
>another robotics event
>a year later
>my friend has been texting girl from another team
>she has a friend
>my friend trying to hook us up
>At the time I thought she was just shy
>looking back she was probably very uncomfortable
>Friend tells me her friend wants to talk to me
>I say fuck it, gotta stop being a wreck and do something
>walk around event, find her talking with other friends of hers
>walk up to her and say something like "hey nice job on that last match
>she sees me, says "oh my god", and runs into the bathroom
>I'm standing there in front of tons of people who just saw that
>I 360 and walk away
>tell friend what happened, he dies laughing
>still not sure if that was a prank or not
>never talk to her again

>>38753657
>>doesn't hit me until far later how fucked that was
yeah ive done shit like this too
takes several hours to understand the mess i did

>>38753706
This one I still literally cringe when I remember
5)
>Elementary school
>4th grade maybe?
>my best friend gave me a stupid ball or something
>I want to keep this thing forever, meant a lot at the time
>kept it with me all day
>bus ride home
Fuck this still hurts.
>Bus is going through route about halfway
>The kids in the back are singing Christmas carols or something since its Christmas time
>I drop ball for some reason
>rolls away, lost in bus
>get very, very upset
>ask for people near me to look for it
>happy people in back still singing and laughing
>I honestly think I'm autistic, don't know why I got so upset about this
>Couldnt find ball, my stop was coming up
>Those kids weren't even looking for it
>scream at them something like "fuck you look for my lost ball"
>they all go quiet and look at me
>I break down into tears and look down
>a minute passes or so of silence and me crying
>my stop, get off bus
>Nothing happens out of it but I saw those people in high school and had classes with them
>hope to god they don't remember the shit I did

>>38753790
shit dude

i know it feels like shit to expose yourself as a total ass

idk what to tell you, im trying to remove the notion that it matters if some supposed person saw me

maybe you just have to live the cringe until you can properly process it tho

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>>38740517
>This happened to me
>Multiple movies with the same girl

>>38753790
6)
More elementary school bullshit
>there's this new kid
>he is annoying and doesn't have any friends
>I decide to be a nice guy and befriend him
>I don't really like him too much but he liked me a lot I think
>he's on my bus and he talks to me about resident evil all the time, I have no idea what that is
>the year goes on and he starts annoying me
>is a person who doesn't get along with others, but I still waa a friend
>end of the yearish
>The cousin of my crush, me, and new kid all were on the same bus
>our bus was late, we were in the back of the classroom waiting together
>Just us and teacher across room doing computer stuff
>I have a genius idea to impress crush's cousin so he would tell her and I would be cool
>New kid is pacing back and forth
>I nudge cousin and say watch this
>I stick my leg out and trip new kid as he is pacing by
>Have never tripped anyone before
>went exactly like movies and shit, but also new kid was clumsy as fuck too
>he spirals out and slams down onto a desk, and then the floor
>ohfuck.jpg
>makes a loud noise, teachers rushes over
>"what happened?!"
>New kid rats on me
>" he tripped me
>panic mode, don't want to get in trouble
>lie and say nuh uh
>New kid gets mad and says yuh huh
>cousin is just shocked and says nothing whole time
>teacher takes my side and scolds new kid for being clumsy since I was a good student and he wasn't
>New kid is pissed at me
>on the way to our bus when it came, cousin is like what the FUCK
>I break down and start ranting about how I thought it would be cool but it wasn't and I was sorry and I was a bad person, etc
>he looks at me in disgust and confusion
>silent bus ride back
>never talked about again
>New kid was not my friend anymore
>still hate myself

>>38753989
This is gunna be my last greentext. I've been spamming too much I think and I want to not do this anymore. I could write shit like this all day long.
7)
>be 13 or so
>at Wal-Mart with dad
>I'm at video game isle playing on free demos
>Dad leaves me there while he goes shopping
>Guitar hero demo, fucking hype
>I was a pro, played it all the time at home
>playing for a while
>these two qt3.14s my age walk over
>mirin' my crazy guitar hero skills
>I'm too nervous to say anything, ignore them
>they try talking to me, say something like "you're really good
>ohshit.jpg
>girls complimenting me, gotta reel em in
>half concentrated on guitar hero, still playing mid song, half concentrated on thinking of talking to them
>one of my first ever conversations with girls and didn't know what to talk about
>had to think of something fast, distracted with guitar hero still though
>finally think of the perfect topic to get panties soaked
>"Im also really good at math!"
>start listing off multiplication shit while I'm playing the song
>listing off a bunch of random multiples
>the girls slowly back away and leave
>I realize how autistic I was but guitar hero, gotta finish the song
>finish song about a minute later
>realize my dad came back and was there for the girls compliments, my autism, and just stood there
>we were walking back to the checkout
>he tells me "so about talking to girls... maybe don't go in with the maybe
>clearly did not work very well
>rarely ever talk to girls again

Maybe I exaggerated how autistic I was in my very first post but I guess when it's your life you look back a lot more critically. Hope you anons could get a chuckle out of these I guess. Maybe I'll post more some other time.

>>38753939
There have been lots of more moments very similar to this where eventually I realized I just can't interact with people / have friends. Also how to control myself so I don't act retarded in front of people.

>>38738088
Ahahaha. Oh, you're a poor soul, i'd hug you.
I usually just get super angry.

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>>38735436
>walk up to long time crush on the last day of 5th grade
>after about an hour of working up to it i gave her my new flip phone number
>"herewhydontyoucallmethisummerokbye"
>she walked up to me and told me her friend ripped it up after i walked off
>nervously laughed and walked away

FUUUUUVUFUHSBAJSJA AJSJDHDBWKWIEUUDUDBZHDJWUSOANBDVEUQIWTTIROEK2V2I9XUBXNSJ

>>38735738
I am 5'5 and you don't see me complain you little fag jk kill me pls

>have crush on grill but nobody knows
>friend of mine and grill do some stuff together
>yesterday saw background of friend and crush. together. in bed.
>havent talked to her since
Fuck that roastiecunt

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> be 15, at a party, alone in basement with two other girls
> girl a tells me girl b wants to "get to know me better"
> unironically reply with "oh cool, tell her to add me on myspace"
> awkward silence

Been asked out twice, but I didn't have sexual feelings then because I was a late bloomer.

1)
>everyone at school thinks shes odd
>I think shes cute
>I ride my bike to her house and we play nintendogs every day
>one day we're in the woods and she confesses feelings
>accidentally cut all contact the next day because I got obsessed with a computer game

2)
>another girl from the neighboring neighborhood
>We start hanging out
>she tells me I have pretty eyes
>asks if I want to go out
>I say "I dont know let me think about it"
>come back the next day
>say yes
>"Sorry anon I found another boyfriend"

>>38741622
It's cause women are breeding with only the tall men, causing their daughters to be taller. The tall daughters in turn find tall partners, slowly creating a master race that will eventually banish manlets.

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>be 14 on summer camp
>last night approaches and boys sneak into girls tent
>play kissing game where boys had to kiss the girls or some shit
>never had any physical contact with grills until now
>try to cower away in order to hide my autism
>get called out to kiss a stacy
>the more i decline the more im pressured to do it, fuck it
>shes on the other corner of the tent so we meet in the center of the tent
>dont know what to do so I close my eyes and pucker my lips
>whole tent sees this cringy display and bursts out laughing, including stacy
>nervously laugh along with them while internally screaming
>that moment is still brought up many years later
>completely destroyed my confidence around all women past regular conversation, afraid to make the first move

Not as cringy as the others but it feels therapeutic to put it out.

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>mfw i got paired up with a hot girl for dance in school
>she asked if i was any good
>said i was the best (can't dance for shit)
>when we were done she said "you're right, u were the best"

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>>38753969
desu i dont think it'd even be too wierd for a girl to just wanna watch a movie with a guy if she wanted to fuck she shoulda made a fucking move or at the very least hinted

>>38736696
>>38739888
>>38743695
Join the army, guys

>>38742650
this is me rn anon, im not 16, but still it's so sad

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>>38754901
u did nothing wrong in 2)
WTF REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

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>>38746482
>he actually thought an attractive woman watched anime and didn't just save a random pic she thought looked nice
Did you learn your lesson?

>>38749602
nigga what is u saying

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>math class, senior year
>teacher is one of those guys who won't continue the lesson until someone answers the question
>we're sitting there in relative silence for over a minute while he just keeps asking if anyone knows the answer, threatening to pick someone at random if noone gives him one
>suck ass at math but I think I have it, decide to bite the bullet and just answer, thinking that the class would be somewhat appreciative
>blurt out the answer
>hear some stacy on the other side of the room talking loudly to her friend "holy shit, he CAN talk"
>whole class is laughing, teacher has to tell them to settle down
>mfw

>>38755160
WAIT ARE ALL t b h 's being turned into "desu"s wtf test: desu

>>38755202
Join Chad city guys
It'll be fun guys
Just go be Chad in Chad Central guis
Just gotta be Ur self

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>>38755414
THEY FUCKING ARE HOLY SHIT desu desu desu desu desu desu

>>38750954
>cantonese fletching forum
what?

>>38755414
Don't forget to pick up your summer on the way out

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>>38739252
Be real, pl0x. This is beyond autism