Ideal gf thread

>>38544035
the one that has a penis.

>>38544035
Ideal girlfriend?

fuck that, give me money.

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I reeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaally miss this 2000s...

>>38544376
forgot to turn off my shitty [s4s] name

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rebosting from brevious bread

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>>38544035

>somewhere between 5'1 and 5'6 in height
>age 24-30

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>>38544269
These threads are disgusting. Do you seriously want to be with someone so vapid, empty, and dependent that they will never serve any purpose beyond sex and comfort? Wastes of human life? How would they help you develop? What are they worth when they age and lose the only thing they had going for them?

You're operating like a "Stacy". You don't seek anyone with skills, principles, creative interests, goals, or purpose. Just use your hand if you actually desire that.

>>38544035
>tfw describing my gf perfectly other than the porn

She even looks like the drawing for the most part.

>>38546790
> Schopenhauer
Can i skip the inane ranting or do i have to learn why Hegel is garbage again?

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>>38546908
He is completely correct

>>38546983
>>38546790
uuum. guys, I didn't delete my comment... some mod must be censuring /r9k/...
well it was fun while it lasted, but if mods are gonna be censuring shit then I'm out of here

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I'm a fan of nintendo so she would be perfect...

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When will I find my gf?

>>38544035
I want to cuddle this gf.

>>38547072
gee maybe because you bypassed the robot?

>>38547307
I did not know that comments could get deleted from that...

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>>38544376
was this actually a thing?

>>38547423
yes. and if you didn't experience it then you missed on the last good generation

>tfw 2003 was 14 years ago...

>>38547165
This makes me sad and strangely aroused at the same time

>>38547480
>strangely aroused
pls be grill

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why couldn't I have been born in canada?

>>38544035
>tfw no sexually repressed gf to repress your sexuality with

>>38547502
23 year old chinese dude

>>38546874
I'm jealous anon. Does she remind you how much she loves you? Does she give you kisses when you're not expecting it? Is it warm when you're sleeping beside her? Do you put your leg over her when you're sleeping together?

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god dammit! whyyyyyyyy can't she be reeeeeeeeal?!

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>tfw no low energy sleepy gf

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Only hope for me. She doesn't exist ;-;

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>>38547623
I would also love a gf like this! basically Tomoko

>>38547423
>you don't want to waste your prime, do you?
i already wasted half of it, what's another half?

>>38547630
this is sad.
Where do you live? Im in germany and in my 20s, if you want to have a friend and hang out, just say so. But this is just pathetic

>>38547735
Iunno, I'm into clingy girls that make me into the whole content of their life, too.

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>>38544035
Someone posted this the other day. The intent behind this looks negative, but I still want to have her on the basis of getting all that attention.

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>>38544035
I wish I had something original to say, all I want is to post this GF meme

>>38547735
I'm Dutch and 21. Sorry but friends take a lot of effort for me and they almost always leave eventually. I just want to find my one true love

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>I managed to get this as the first image last gf thread
>1 reply
>anon saying I should kill myself for acting like this type of mommy is ideal
>he didn't even green text any stories.
Fuck my life lads.

>>38547812
a BONG AND A BLICE? PIPE AND A WAFFLE? CIGAR AND A PANCAKE??

all the people saying
>you guys are pathetic
>this is just sad
>get a life
need to get the fuck out! /r9k/ is for people like this.
if you think we're sad then congratufuckinglations you discovered our hideout from reality and need to go back to living your perfect little fucking life!
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

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>>38548026
The fuck? Everything okay?

>>38548065
this
what do you fucking expect? We are forever aloners, let us be normalfags

>>38547786
Have you ever actually dated one?

>>38548098
then there's no PLEEEEAAAASSSSIIINNG you. You're toight, anon. Toight like a TOIGER.

>>38548266
i love gooooooooold

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>>38547423
FUCK OFF YOU BITCH IM WORKING ON GETTING MYSELF TOGETHER

ideal gf
>dies
>leaves me a lot of money and her mansion
>cryptic messages everywhere
>I discover a secret room in the basement
>it is full of forgotten texts from ages long gone
>reading them triggers a... transformation
>as I begin to think more and more like the ancients, I notice that I am being watched and followed
>eventually I break free from normal thought completely and the ancients reveal that they are still alive and well, and perhaps even immortal
>they take me onto their spaceship as one of them and we fuck around and explore the universe until it dies
>my gf is on that ship and it turns out her death was staged to set events into motion

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>>38547630
>Only hope for me
hoo boy same

i just want to be loved :(

>>38544035
Wew, that's pretty hot, OP

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Well this thread made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Shame it's all just a MS Paint picture and I don't really deem myself worthy of even thinking about having a gf ever since my looks and health started deteriorating in my mid 20's.

Do you think there's a Heaven for someone like us, brother?

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>>38547793
>getting attention in exchange for constant mental exhaustion
You deserve to be food

>>38547793
What's with the >slurp
I'd want to hug her tight every second with my dick inside her
Cutie. Plus she looks like >>38547630 with higher graphics

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fuck you mods I'm reposting my ideal gf!!!!

>>38548563
did you miss the part where shes an emotional vampire
that means she sucks emotions out of you

>>38548775
>tfw INTP
>tfw mentally broken already
Can't suck emotions out of someone who has none. If anything she'll put emotions into me if she can get me to love her.

>>38548228
Yes, I was too much for her to handle because I was more extreme in making someone else my life

>>38548842
>>Can't suck emotions out of someone who has none.
>>If anything she'll put emotions into me if she can get me to love her.
>implying she won't leave you the moment she finds someone who feels more emotions

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>>38548726
>>38547118
I want to play games on such terms.
Damn I'm lonely.

>>38549027
That's why she also needs to be irreversibly obsessive and yandere so she attaches herself to me and never lets go no matter what.

>>38549101
>being this desperate and retarded
nigger her whole life depends on feeding off of emotions. the chart even says she gets physically sick if she can't feed off of people
once she sees you're nothing but an empty husk, she'll leave you. why would someone risk that much of their life for you?

>>38549083
me too anon... me too... but it looks like we'll stay lonely forever

>>38545577
this is not how you do it you fucking retard

>>38549346
Yep, it's too late for me because I'm past the point where I at least had my looks going on for me. Now my hairline is on lifeline and I just can't see something like that happening with the current me, just can't imagine it.
I wish I could die in my sleep because I don't really like the idea of damage control for the next 50 years or so.

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>>38549223
Because none of this is real and girls with such a specific and perfect personality I'm looking for don't exist so this is all a fantasy.

>why would someone risk that much of their life for you?
Because she's perfect for me and whatever type of girl I make up in my head won't leave me ever.

>>38548398
There's a universe where inter universal time travelers go back in time and save someone whos dying the instant they're about to and replaces them with an exact copy only dead so that the time line isn't disturbed. That's a theory I believe, when we die they will deliver us to our soulmates from other universes. It's either that or we actually die, I'm cool with whatever happens

>>38549353
Yeah, like I give a shit.

my ideal gf is my current gf
ask me anything
(if you like - otherwise i'll just fuck off)

>>38549685
how did you get her? didn't you get nervous when you tried to talk to her?

>>38547502
It aroused me; and I'm a grill.

>>38547519
Canadian here, women seem nicer but not too much

>>38549932
we met through online dating (OKcupid lol). it was terrifying in the beginning but she was patient with all my autisms and we've been together for 3 years. getting married next year too.

>>38550061
>okcupid
People who live in countries where online dating is used cannot be robots. Anglos CANNOT be robots.
Fuck off.

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>>38550159
I'm not Anglo. I'm a Swede
GF lived in Poland so I ended up there too. It's not bad

>>38547623
Goddamnit why'd you have to give her freckles and a hoodie? Too close to home

>>38550200
I didn't make this one but freckles and hoodie on girls are insanely hot!

>>38549425
>durr i love this ideal gf
>*explains what she really does*
>durrhurr i'll deny what she does and project my own thing on her because muh perfect jee eff
make your own ideal gf you nigger

>>38547623
tfw no GF to wreck kids on MW2 with

>>38550289
I did >>38547630

>>38550198
How do you set okcupid to be international ffs. I only see the same 3 slags in this country who use this shit app every single time and they all match <50% REEE

>>38550237
Absogoddamnlutely

>>38544376
This is literal perfection.

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A girl you can pick up.

>>38550373
no idea - she just showed up one day as a 97% match and I messaged her

>>38550516
How do you match? Was she a virgin when she met you?
>messaging her first
What a Chad.

>>38550570
She was. God bless Polish women

>>38548865
You're exactly my type except you're too young. What should I look for in order to detect people like you? Where can I find people like that? Are there any particular traits I should look out for?
I've had one boyfriend but the same happened to me, no one takes obsession as far as I do.

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Please tell me a girl like this exists.

>>38546790
People who listen to Current 93 are almost always ugly.

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made this last night

i just want a sad, lonely girl to heal and love

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Reposting this nightmare.
Now that i think about it, it looks similar to >>38552550

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>>38547629
Giv cuddle gf

>>38552364
Thats pretty base, anon. She wouldnt say Sensei tho, and depending on age she wouldnt be saved.

>>38547629
Tfw acquired this gf

It only sucks when i want to go somewhere with her and she sleeps all day, shes fucking impossible to wake up

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I don't know why I post this...
I don't know why I have to remind them of the suffering.

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Fishxhdhchdhdhcjs

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Here we have more suffering.

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>all these predators actively trying to find you to break you
kowai

>>38544376
more like 2005 tbdesu

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Large and in charge and vulnerable

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>>38550490
>a girl you can pick up

Try this one on for size.

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>implying there are girls on the internet
>implying this comment is original

>>38553550
I'm not even into punk music or anything but this is a good one.

>>38553506
It'd be hard to take her places... but I guess it's cute.

>>38553613
>it'd be hard to take her places

It would be way easier to take her places. Just put her in your shirt pocket and you can sneak her into theaters, restaurants, and national parks for free.

>>38553550
>tfw had this gf
>she had green hair
>she was also low self esteem and convinced herself she was ugly even though she was hot
>liked having sex as much as possible

but she was also a
>horse girl
and therefore psychotic in the end

>>38547672
Are you qt enough to be my edgy bf?

>>38551027
I'm not obsessive but would love an obsessive gf. Good enough? Are you like >>38547630

be my gf

>>38553700
>and therefore psychotic in the end
are you implying thats a bad thing

>>38544035
a cute, funny, and intelligent girl that i can stay in the pre-relationship flirting period with forever, but never have to worry about losing her to someone else.

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>>38544035
Our flag has been returned.

>>38553724
even if I was we most definitely do not live on the same place

>>38553820
she turned into an attention whore and probably a literal whore

mentally taxing and not worth it

maybe one day she will learn, after she probably has someone's kid and gets abused

>>38553910
[VGTG]I am the
[VGS] Shazbot!
[VGTW] When will you
[VGS] Shazbot!
*entire lobby spamming WHOHOO*

I'm sad the devs raped that game into the dirt. Such fun.

>>38554112
I know anon, I know.
All good things must come to an end, but at that moment I truly felt like I was [VGTG].

>>38547519
If you're looking for a real Canadian gf, stay out of Ontario bud

>>38547630
HNNNNGG
IM GOING TO FUCKING HIT SOMETHING

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>>38544376
this is LITERALLY me as preteen, except we played DDR on the PS2 instead

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this is my waifu say something nice to her

>>38555057
This and mute/deaf signing gf make me really sad that I can't cherish that innocence.

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I never experienced love before. Ever since I was born I've been feeling like a nuisance to my family, and now I have no one.

>>38555057
I would but she wouldn't be able to see it

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this gf is best gf

>>38555142
Don't worry, we have text-to-speech.

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the realistic gf

>>38547623
This is some of the most pathetic shit ive seen on r9k. These threads are why you faggots are lonely.

>>38555307
You got your cause and effect swiched up there buddy.

>>38555336
I dont think so. I also get the impression of of these dudes are still in their teens by how immature some of them seem. These threads are a different level of cringe.

>>38555389
You're a fucking newfag if you think robots being a pathetic bunch has anything to do with either this place or these memes.
Now if you said that our lonely bunch has a tendancy to idealize women which is part of why they are lonely, you might just have a point there, but you chose to go for bullshit instead.

So Romeo; you're in the wrong place my friend, you better leave.

>>38546983
What did he say?
Censorship, here?Wtf

>>38544035
>*starts to shake as you move your hands downwards*

CUTE

>>38555455
Got stuck here back in 07. Im probably out of touch, but im only leaving if i die or place gets shut down.

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I need to make a new one.

>>38547630
She exists for a while. Turns out someone that desperate for "love" will go anywhere to get it, though, and you'll be left even more hurt than before.

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dDon't have a name for it but I want it

Do you guys use MSP for this shit?

>>38555703
Look at this duuuude. Oh no no no no no. aaaahahahhahahahahhahabab.


Normie memes are better than this trash oh how this place changed.

>>38544035
I need to molest this gf

>>38555936
Oh ill be here through next summer. Chances are ive been here longer than you too

>>38555971
>i'm not new i've been here all summer

>>38555988

>teh rei xD
>bring back snacks

epic

>>38556034
>googling shit to look like and oldfag
>teh rei isn't even that old
ebin

>>38556081
I wish that was the case. Life is pain

>>38556034
Truly the cancer that is killing /b/

>>38556248
that's a little rude

>>38556201
Ive been here since puddi you newfag

>>38556523
I've been there when this piece of shit of a website was still a .net
People don't even know how good they have it now, at least hiroshimoot doesn't have constant outages on his data collection facility.

>>38556523
sure you have buddy
or as you oldfags say, ALL BASES SURE DO BELONG TO US EBIN KAPPA XD

>>38556523
>>38556577
5$ says you're two newfags trying to act like a badasses. Stop already. No real oldfag would brag about his oldfaggery

>>38556629
Believe me, I wish I could cash in the money, I've wasted my life on this stupid website and at least it would have been worth something.
But hey, I don't really need to prove you anything, because I'm anon, and you're anon, and we're all anon, and ain't that fucking beautiful.

Fuck, I never knew I'd feel nostalgia for a bunch of lonely anime autists saying nigger every other word like it's actually funny.

>>38547623
I with you until you said Xbox Live, fuck off normie

>>38544035
>>38546874
My niggas, feels good having a top tier gf.

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>>38556850
well, I didn't make her, but I agree.
so here, I fixed it

>>38556629
>>38556629
Were being self depreciating about how long weve been here you daft cunt.

Robot autism is just too nuch sometimes

>>38547630
>tfw they are okay with your clingy tendencies

>>38547623
Fuuuck, this hit way too close to home.

>>38552364
Anon, why do you want to fuck Marc Brown's 'Arthur'?

>>38558151
Heh that was actually pretty funny. Jokes aside I gave her the "Arthur" glasses because I thought they looked dorky and I have a thing for dorks.

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>tfw you will never have this gf

>>38551027
There's no real tell. You just notice it like three months in.

Unfinished Pure Text Meta Description GF
>Anon I hope you don't mind that I don't have a visual representation...
>I'm not any less real than the other girls you imagine in this thread right?
>It's okay, because it's you're imagination I can be perfect for you.
>You can even assume I like all the same stuff as you but in a way that we still have things to talk about.
>Whoops I meant "your" in the other sentence above this, sorry!
>I'm sorry if I get a little bit flustered, I didn't exist until a few moments ago.
>Not that I'm underaged or anything! That would be weird you silly sicko!
>I'm just kidding, you're all I might of even existed in some form for as long as things have been written, but as long as you're here reading this, this might as well have been my whole life, because I love you and you mean the world to me.
>Don't worry, we can keep talking as long as anon keeps writi

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I'm not a robot but I will be eventually

>>38555141
hhahsdhasdhHHAAUUGHH dont do this im fucking tearing up and smiling at this fucking picture

>>38560659
this spooked me

why is it in darkness

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Piety gf

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>>38560828
walk in the dark when there is no light

>>38560848
>let's throw rocks at niggers
WIFE MATERIAL

>>38560855
dont scare me with this gril

tsundere mosin gf
>a-anon do you really think I'll look better with all those Tapco accessories on me?
>i-it's not like I want you to fire me or anything!
>I don't want you to field clean me! I don't!
>c-could you please... c-c-clean the cosmoline out of my chamber?
>Well fine, if you want to shoot gimmicky tactical guns all day and not touch me, go ahead! I don't care!
>...anon, c-could you hold me tonight? I had a bad dream about the eastern front again... please anon, I'm really scared.
>zzzzz... anon, I love you so much...

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Hearing impaired gf.

>>38559607
I need this gf in my life

>>38559607
>glock fan
>loving a girl with such shit taste

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>>38561183
>Deaf
Cute, unless they're a deaf supremacist

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Not sure if one of these have been made but oh well.
The clothing and hair are supposed to be futuristic, but I dunno.

>>38552550
no no no you fucking dont want a girl like that

>>38561714
he doesn't know how humans work, be nice

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I bought a ticket to the world, but now I've come back again, oh how I want the truth to be SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIID.

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>>38547630
This is me. And pic related

>>38544376
>wasn't even allowed to be goth during youth
>wasn't allowed anime watching (no computer and bedtime)
>didn't get to have mallgoth in any way because of oppression
>now it's time to be an adult
>ten years later still no adult life
What did you expect faggots?

>>38561497
man I feel like this could make for a really good anime

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why was I even born

none of this makes sense anymore

>>38544035
bump
lets see more of them ideal gfs

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>>38544035
very cute, OP
>>38547165
why ask for a qt gf if you're just going to hit her?
>>38547623
>>38547629
cyuuuuute
>>38548726
the floofy hair was much better!
>>38552550
>tfw no gf to raise each others' self esteems with
>>38555208
I know...
>>38561183
>>38562655
love it

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I made me originailo

>>38564235
>K-ON dress
i will date you just on the basis of this
nice taste

>>38553436
i saw some fetish here

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I want it so bad...

>>38564431
Stop clinging to impossibilities robro, it's just not healthy. I want it too ;_;

>>38564053
>why ask for a qt gf if you're just going to hit her?
Because I'll still love her.

>>38548004
FCUK I WANT ONE

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>>38544035
>crew cut socks with lowtops

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>>38544035
>starts to shake as you move your hand downwards

Good shake or bad shake?

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I NEED ONE OF THESE
RIGHT NOW

>>38564235
That's a pretty good gf, would marry and protect forever.

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>>38564635
Also posting the only other good one.

I want a morbidly obese gf. I want a gf who is hopeless obese and still on the gaining swing. I'm a considered a catch by most girls too but I can never meet single obese girls where I live. Feels fucking bad.

Every single one of these girls exists right now, is getting turned inside out by Chad right now, and will wake up tomorrow as "strong independant women that don't need no man".

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l must obtain this gf

>>38564644
This is beyond obviously an intj, not an intp. I swear none of you people understand the theory

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>>38555208
BUT SHE'S THE ONLY ONE!!!!

>>38564370
Are you kidding K-ON is the most over-rated normie tier anime ever.

>>38564620
I was going for a good shake, I probably shouldn't have been so ambiguous with that.

>>38547793
id let her succ me if you know what i mean

>>38544035
this one is good OP-kun, I'd violate the fuck out of that

>>38544727
My God this is so hyper specifc and amazing I never even knew I needed it anon.

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>>38565072
>I was going for a good shake