how does /r9k/ deal with crippling depression?

>>38255794
By remembering that I can always kill myself

>>38255933
dubs of truth.
what's stops you from killing yourself?

>>38255794
You don't. It just festers inside forever.

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>>38255794

I sometimes drink. It doesn't help though.

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>>38255933
This. I've tried multiple times to kill myself. I don't wanna do it right now because things are going quite well. Maybe later

>>38255794
I am very angry with certain individuals and i'll be damned if i go out whilst they keep on living their happy lives
DISCLAIMER: I DONT PLAN TO KILL ANYBODY

>>38255933
/thread

orig orig

I go to group therapy. Making people laugh there helps but I learned I'm only funny in group convesation and I'm afraid of never being able to really connect with anybody. Other than that, I listen to asmr while half asleep, talk to mutes and 8 year olds in Gmod, play cyoa's, and escape into open world and comfy games.
I have tried to kill myself before tho.

>>38255794

Original drugs and alcohol my man.

>>38255933

>think this
>come close
>realize i can't do it
>situation becomes even worse

I think it drove me insane. At least it changed my personality. I don't know what to do now

I usually take pills and then try to meditate on getting out of a dark place. Listening to those audio clips of nature seems to center or calm me sometimes.

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>>38256953
If you have hard time overcoming your survival instinct that prevents your imminent suicide, you should try to get drunk, there's a reason why alcohol it's called "liquid courage"

>>38255794
Jerking off a lot.

Drugs and alcohol
>liquor and opiates and hash oil

>>38255794
I managed to "get rid" of my depression by going for long bike rides through the woods, or up climb up a mountain. In reality I haven't "got rid" of depression it just goes away for a while. Mine comes in waves, I can go 3-4 months being okay-ish, then have 2-3 months of wanting to kill myself at every waking moment. So yeah, I wouldn't say I deal with it, I'd say I've learnt to manage it & predict when bad periods are going to happen.

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>>38255794

Escapism works for a while. You'd have to raise the level of escape each time and you will feel worse and worse living in the real word each time you raise your level of escapism but it might just help you in the end, at least for a little while.

Video games and TV are pretty standard entry-level escapism. They feel good and you can sink yourself into them for months. They'll eventually start feeling more like a chore then a good time, so you'll have to step it up.

Next level is media meant specifically for escapism. Fantasy-related stuff fit into this category, although the most extreme form of escapist media is anime/manga (Including visual novels and anime games). They seem so perfect, flawless... Everything and everyone is beautiful, it warms your heart from the inside and you'll feel so, so good if you do it right. But it comes with a high price tag. Eventually after over consuming you'll stop appreciating the beauty in the real world. Slowly, but it will happen. Now you can't find good in the real world at all, pretty much... So you'll have to step it up.

You'll find yourself wanting not only to view someone else's perspective of the world, but to alter your own. So you pick up a bottle or a joint. Feels good and alters the world around you a bit. You'll find yourself wanting more, and either overconsume weak drugs or move to stronger ones. Then each and every second you're not jaded you'll want to go back, only to feel bad when it stops. You'll search for more, and more things to medicate yourself with. So you'll have to step it up.

From here, you might give to the life of constantly going on-and-off between this world and the altered, blurry one. You'll one day realize you just can't no more. The drugs effect you less and less and being in the real world causes you pain. So you step it up one last time. You wanted to escape from this life, this world, so you fade away one last time.

So we fade, robots. We fade.

>>38255794
Constant escapism. Although it sucks when the anhedonia comes back, and the stuff I usually use to take my mind off things stops being interesting. Also what >>38255933 said.

>>38257759
>not being entirely disconnected from experiencing reality in the moment.
>not experiencing reality through a delayed internal paracosm landscape where real life experiences manifest in represented interpreted forms that fit this internal world.
>even being able to still react to life 'live' and turning off the autopilot.

How do non schizoid spectrums even compete?

Memes and 4chan with lots of escapism

>>38255794
jerk off and read shoujo manga

>>38255794
I just live with it, I feel like I can't do anything more than at leat seeing a shrink.

I work hard to fight it and search for something more and continue to fight so i can be an example for others to follow until they can walk ahead of me. Its working.

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>>38255794
A cute girl's attention.
> mfw wish I was lying.

>got terrible ruminating thoughts about how worthless I am etc etc
>look really sad most of the time, everyone notices and judges
>gets worse with time
>often can't focus on other things, spending several hours a day just staring ahead of myself thinking about my shitty life
>enter therapy
>only gets worse
>sometimes feel so hopeless I want to cry and shout at the same time but can't because no tears
>therapy slowly starts to fix my outlook on life
>realise my problem is not trying
>realise that people will always judge you, it doesn't matter as long as you can achieve your goals
>go travel for months in a row
>acquire gf
I do still feel sad sometimes, it's just not as intensive as it used to be, by far, and doesn't consume so much of my attention.

>>38255794
>crippling
nothing. Just let the void kick in and wait till it is over :)

I am currently drinking alcohol. Nothing strong, just bought myself a 1L bottle of beer and gonna finish it before sleeping.

It isn't the best way to cope for sure, but recently things have gotten for me pretty depressing for me and a good day is one in which I don't get suicidal thoughts until the after noon. Of course I am not gonna kill myself but the thoughts are there, nagging the fuck out of me. I am not homeless but I am in a very shitty situation and living with people that thinks very little of me.

>>38255794
Booze and masturbating. But mostly booze

>>38255957
Part fear of death, part not wanting my parents to have to deal with it. It would wreck them. But I'm probably not going to last another month.

>>38256686
I've been here for a decade. I wonder how many of the hundreds or even thousands of anons i've seen say they were gonna off themselves have done it

>>38255794

Escapism

Games, movies, sci-fi, books, comics, music

I only enjoy other realities other thn mine.

Jerkin off also

>>38260711
Masturbation is a very shitty way to cope because although you legit enjoy it for a while many regret it immediately after cumming. Even if you're edging a couple of hours you'll eventually spill it out and feel regretful and drained and all the thoughts of how shitty your life is will swar you all at once.

At least that's what happens to me, but I still jack it because my life is shit and everyone despises me.

God sometimes I wish I died back then when I was in a situation so shitty I couldn't even afford food.

>>38258779

Shizoid here, literally dont know wgat the fuck your blabering about

>>38257759
10/10 worth the read
time to escape

>>38260711
I can't masturbate or don't want to when I'm drunk, but doing ritalin or weed and jacking off is god smack. Weed gives you so many new feels and makes you feel things intensely like when you first experienced things. Ritalin on the other hand makes you compulsively horny and you might jack of for hours.

>>38260858
i don't feel regretful; i enjoy my jerk off sessions.

>>38261273
I guess it's why I prefer to work out and I enjoy that overall feeling of manliness that comes after and during that day. Every time I jerk it I feel like a fucking beta human trash but of course I can't help it because of course who I'm gonna fuck anyways.

>>38255794
Video games + fapping + hobbies + working out
Going outside helps, even just driving around in the middle of nowhere by yourself and blasting good music.
If you have no friends, talk to your parents. Talking to people and getting shit off of your chest is better than festering by yourself.