BEST FAP MEMORIES

>be kid
>with my friend Austin on his dad's yacht
>his dad invites a girl he's dating
>she's a teacher
>later on in the day we go on his speed boat
>she's a bikini
>start staring at her boobs
>her tits come out of her bikini
>she doesn't even bother to fix it
>her tits are out the whole time till we get back to the dock
still fap to it sometimes m8

>>38219237
Maybe you're just telekenetic?

>>38219248
Well it was pretty bumpy so I think that's why :)

>>38219168
what is the pic supposed to do ?

>Had a stupid idea that nursing would be a good profession.
>Started a nursing degree, thinking I'd be able to pretend to be a doctor
>First placement was three months
>Everyday I had to wash old people and help them use the toilet.

Absolutely haram. There was one patient who was in her 40s and she looked pretty good, but the rest were 80+. I still shudder everytime I think about it.

Fortunately, it wasn't my first time seeing a naked female, as I had previously hired prostitutes.

There was one time when I was 13 and a girl in my class leaned over in front of me and I saw her nipple.

9 years later and it's still a cherished memory.

I never seen a vagina in person so fuck you

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>>38219324
Supposed to reduce wrist pain due to too much fapping. Here we go, this one's a little gross but 100% real.

>Be me, senior year of highschool
>Senior picnic at local state park
>Everyone's spread out among the grounds wondering around
>Hanging out with 9/10 QT acquaintance and her friends, trying to get balls up to ask her out
>We are on remote ass trail, her 2 friends are far ahead
>QT announces she has to piss, and it's too far back to main area. Tells me to 'stand guard and don't look' but i can completely see her in peripheral
>QT proceeds to step completely OUT of her jeans. She is wearing a long shirt partially covering lower body but i notice she free muffin
>Stand at attention so hard it hurts. She is wearing nothing but her top and these platform sneakers popular at the time (candies?)
>Stands feet far apart, lifts top up to waist. I get unblocked view of closely trimmed vag. I can literally see the bubblegum pink of her slight outie.
>She bends knees and shoots hissing gusher right down into the dirt. I am close enough to smell ammonia/sticky sweet girlish scent.
>I literally explode and mess my pants
>She climbs back into jeans and apologizes
>MFW

My best memory of HS

>>38219324

Creates mustard gas. Don't do it.

>>38219554
I might have pic of girl related to prove 9/10

>Worked at a bbq restaurant during high school
>There was a really flirty waitress who was around 19
>She was super cute but kind of trashy
>Got her nipples pierced
>she was playing with her nipples because they were irritated
>caught me staring
>"anon want to see my nipples?"
>"...yes"
>she flashed me

Other than that just a couple of strip clubs. Shit

>>38219554
>Supposed to reduce wrist pain
Nice try - it's probably some ancient chinese pressure point voodoo that'll paralyze you

Anyone here right handed but fap with their left hand?

>>38219573
Don't listen to this faggot, I tried it and it made crystals.

>>38219554
wtf is the joke in that pic?

jgvhvvgdsgfd

>>38219833
Of course. Don't want to get lotion on my mouse

>>38219853
mah nibba

>>38219852
I think it's just another way to say "You fags will eat up anything"

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>>38219554

>be me, 8th grade
>have crush on qt redhead
>she's probably a 9, and has monster tits for her age
>now, at the time I was going to a semi-richkid private school, which was easily the best time of my life
>we go on a lake trip with whole class, tubing, waterskiing, hiking, etc
>I get selected to be in her group, and we go out to go tubing
>pretty cold this time of year in Oregon, but we go anyways
>after we're done, she's dripping wet and freezing cold in the front of the boat
>feels bad
>Decide to grow a pair and steal a huge flannel blanket from emergency kit and take it to her
>Go up there, say "you look cold, want to join me?"
>she agrees and we start chitchatting, goes really well
>"anon, my clothes are really wet, mind if I take them off under the blanket and let them dry?"
>I say "sure, whatevs"... play it cool
>sperging out in my head, but I manage to contain my autism/spaghetti
>MFW
>on the way back, I steal a glance under the blanket
>MOTHER_OF_GOD.JPEG
>Massive bouncing tits erect from the cold
>jizz load in pants

We were friends for a few years after that surprisingly. she never knew. still fap about it to this day.

>>38219661

Post the girl then cunt sticks

Towards the end of a small party, around 5am, friends and friends of friends decided it was a good idea to go swim in a creek, naked and nearly blackout drunk. It was early summer, but water was at like 12 degrees at best. So they all got naked, went swimming, couples started fooling around. I stayed on the shore because I'm fat and self-conscious, not drunk enough to find it fun, and I was too drunk and it was too dark to find it hot.

I was just talking with a girl and sipping on my drink, when I noticed that a childhood friend, the staciest Stacy of them all, the most popular girl of our group, a near 10/10 that all the guys at every party we ever went to together tried in some way to get with, swam far away from the shore, and started to look like she was drifting away with the current, panicking and near drowning. No one had noticed. So I jumped in the water, brought her back to shore. She was very cold, scared, almost passed out, had injured herself kinda badly on the rocks. I carried back to the house with the girl that stayed on the shore, while all the others had barely noticed. At the time the adrenaline was too high to notice her perfect body shivering next to mine, her perky nipples, her holding onto me and not letting go, snuggling up in my torso.

I realised all that fast when I started taking care of her back at the house, though. I gave her a bath, cleaned and dressed the wounds, comforted her. I was pretty much rock hard the whole time. Thankfully the other girl had passed out. She kept thanking me when she wasn't crying. I carried her to bed, and she asked to stay. She fell asleep quickly, still holding my arm. Seeing her like this, finally asleep, naked under a open bathrobe, her warmth just next to me, trusting me, that was the hottest thing I had ever seen. Don't know how I managed to control myself. I just caressed her hair and her face. I actually had to sleep next to her because every time I tried to leave, she'd wake up and ask me to stay.

>>38220651
so did you get laid or not

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>>38220651
>not drunk enough to find it fun, and I was too drunk

>>38220003
You probably could have smashed. Great story though.

>>38220827
Nah, or it wouldn't be a fap memory, isn't it? She's more like a sister to me than anything else anyway, even if it was hot as fuck, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I took advantage of her in that state. I slept next to her, then we all took her to a doctor when we woke up, just in case. We were always close, but since this we've been even closer. She, and her whole family, shills for me whenever they can. She brings up that story like at least once a month, and every time we go out together and she sees me talking with a girl. I actually lost my virginity to the girl I had been talking to on the beach that same summer, though.

>>38220841
Sorry, it's pretty late. I was very drunk, drunk enough to not realise how hot the situation was, but I could still realise that going swimming was a bad idea.

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>>38220010
posted in other thread bc i asked her out and got rejected.

>>38220003
So i'm not the only one whose dick just gave up and exploded on sight. i am not alone

>7th grade
>Bet qt $5 she wouldn't show me her tits
>Says she will tomorrow
>Yeah right
>Tomorrow comes
>Party at best Bros house
>She gets slammed with a few daquiris
>Tells me she needs one more then meet upstairs
>Oh shit
>Upstairs
>She pulls me into the bathroom
>Pay up!
>I do
>Flashes for 5 seconds
>Sperg out and run out the door
>Fap furiously to it that night
>Haven't talked to her since
First time there.

2nd time hurts.
>Start dating girl
>Bit of a whale
>Not very attracted to her
>But her best friend holy shit
>Fell hard in love with her
>Whenever I hung out with then gf, she always came with
>GF = L, best friend = A
>L says her and A are a package deal, so I'm both their bfs
>Feels like a trap but go with it
>Holding hands, sleeping in the same bed as L and A
>Was cash, but never did anything sexual with A, just L
>A had an actual bf, but long distance
>Time passes, L cheats on me
>Eh w/e, I was in love with A anyways
>Break up
>Go to A for comfort
>Start talking daily on Skype
>One day she asks me "hey Anon... What would you do if I said I wanna show you me in my bra and panties"
>Sperg out, manage to slip out "O-Donnell"
>Heart going 2fast4u
>She gets down to bra and panties
>Holy shit
>Solid 8/10, 38 C titties
>She fucking nip slips
>Screenshot it
Ended up getting a 5 minute video of her playing with her boobs for me. I fap to it once a week

>>38221600
>manage to slip out "O-Donnel"

Topkek. I'm guessing that's autocorrect, but still. You filthy phoneposter.

Was 14 or 15. A Thai waitress leaned over my table for a long while wore a loose shirt and no bra.

When she realised I was looking she virtually ran into the back rooms and served with a jacket the rest of the night.

>>38222473
N-no happy ending?

>>38219847
Why the fuck do you need to lie on the internet? It makes your hand explode and makes bone shrapnel go everywhere.

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>>38221600
I'm so fucking sad that I couldn't have this experience. I'm pretty young, and keep thinking, "It'll happen soon, I just haven't had enough time yet!" This just proves that nothing is stopping me and i'm too sperg to have that kind of thing happen to me and that I need to get off my ass.

>>38221304
That girl a

C U T E
U
T
E

>>38223814
you can see why i busted a nut right there

>>38222939
Itll happen man. Keep your chin up.

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>me and friend at 14 years old
>watching porn
>dicks are out (separate couches)
>mid-fap, notice I can see friend
>he's jerking super fast, mouth agape, eyes shut tight
>cum spills everywhere
>seeing this immediately makes me cum
>never tell him or anyone

>>38219168
>Be in Boy Scouts
>Camping and this year it is especially rainy
>People basically hiding in tents
>Want to join some other kids tent to talk shit
>Open flap
>Fat, short, hairy communist on the right
>Short, thin, bald stoner on the left holding a waterstained picture
>Both fapping furociasy
>Can see the stoners erect dick and part of the commie's chode
>They dont notice me
>Sneak out and tell some other guys
>They open the tent and autistic screaming ensues
Fuck I messed with that commie so much that trip, burning his skidmarked underwear in an explosive candle, pulling out hos tent stakes during a rainstorm and having the tent fall and water pour in, putting it up agian to find a massive wolfspider on him.
Bouscouts were fun

>>38225736
3rd time in a row this happened, I post in a decent thread and the moment I do the thread dies.
>tfw so autistic and socially inept even robots hate you

I used to be friends with this girl who wore skirts/dresses without panties all the time and who was bad at hiding it. She was always incredibly well shaved too, maybe she waxed or something.

I thought she was showing me on purpose, but when I made a move she freaked out and never talked to me again. Still, many faps were had.

>have half-assed threesome with some friends
>they're both autistic so it was awkward
>watched them fuck
>fucked the girl while she sucked his D
>fapped to guy eating her out
>finished to her succing him to finish

>>38225798
I hate you for sharing your ridiculous gay communist boyscout fantasies, you fucking degenerate.

>>38219168
When I was 16 a girl had to convince me to not only feel her butt, but feel her bare tit under her shirt. It was hot as fuck, and before I stopped masturbating, I jerked off to it a lot.

Then she started being a cunt, so I stopped talking to her. I had the first and only adult jerk off session of my life where I just stroked it to get rid of the anger. Probably the best I've ever had.

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>be me aged 19
>go to school art lessons
>life drawing oh boy
>mfw naked woman posing for 2 hours
>did some drawings and did not fap to them because I'm not a desperate pathetic skeev who salivates at the sight of a nude female
>repeat like a hundred times and get better at drawing

10/10 would recommend