Psychological Issues #86

Hey Nick

Can you recommend something for me to read about mother issues? Like for example, you want a girlfriend to treat you like a son and a mother in turn etc.

>>38192779

Try reading about attachment styles. That might be what you're interested in.

>>38192807
Thank you. Are you an actual psychotherapist or something?

>>38192865

Not yet, but I have extensive experience with various types of mentally ill people. Decades' worth of close and personal study, if you like.

I can rant about your potential issue if you want, and you can judge me on it.

>>38192581
>>>38192865

>Not yet, but I have extensive experience with various types of mentally ill people. Decades' worth of close and personal study, if you like.

We all do.

>I can rant about your potential issue if you want, and you can judge me on it.

It's kind of embarrassing but ok

I have a tendency to act childish in order to gain a parental kind of affection. I basically want to be babied. I hate it, it makes me feel ashamed of myself when I think about it.

>>38192998
>We all do.

If that were true, you'd already know all I know.

>I have a tendency to act childish in order to gain a parental kind of affection. I basically want to be babied. I hate it, it makes me feel ashamed of myself when I think about it.

All right. Focus on this, as a child, your primal instinct is to be liked by your parents, because your survival depends on it. It's not a matter of feelings, it's a matter of life or death. Human children don't survive without adults. Think caveman stuff. Babies cries when left alone because that's when predators would snatch them from their parents, so babies who cried more quickly and tolerated being left alone less were naturally selected.

Most likely, you learned to get attention from your parent(s) by acting a certain way. This was encouraged in you and you saw it as the only way to get the attention/love you deserved. Robin Williams had to use humor to get his mother's attention and it was the only way to get her out of her constant depression as well. So he became a comedian.

Don't feel ashamed, there are reasons why this is happening, reasons you need to understand. The question is: did you behave this way with your mother as well, or was something missing that you're trying to get now as an adult?

I believe I can help a buttload with this. Way more coming after you answer.

>>38192581
Ive posted this in two threads already cuz I want to know if im crazy or not. Ill post it again cuz I want to get your opinion nick

I was locked up in the institute a few months back for attenuated psychosis (psychosis lite version) but now after I was released ive started getting worse. Ive developed depression, anxiety and OCD. Ive also started hearing my name being called at random times in public and I don't know if im hallucinating or not. I was delusional a while ago, but now im better now that im on meds.

I just want to go off of them and let whatever monster is hiding come out so I can know if I have schizophrenia or not. These symptoms are such a cock tease, if it wasn't for my father I would've stopped my meds a long time ago.

What should I do? Also am I hallucinating?

>>38193135

Do you have a psychiatrist? If not, get one, and tell him you'd like to get off medication to see how things go. If you're supervised by a doctor, it will be safer.

As to "crazy", once you know various conditions in details, the word doesn't mean anything anymore. You may have a psychiatric condition, but in that case you're better off knowing and getting the appropriate medication.

What you've listed doesn't sound like pure schizophrenia to me, and these symptoms exist in many conditions, and may have to do with things other than purely brain malfunctions.

So yeah, are you supervised by a psychiatrist?

>>38193233
Yeah I have a psychiatrist. She said that its not a good idea to go off meds incase I have a full psychotic episode. Im just tired of getting new symptoms all the time. Now I just want to lock myself in my room and never take meds again. Should I tell my therapist I feel this way? Is it bad that I want to be psychotic?

>>38193109
>Don't feel ashamed, there are reasons why this is happening, reasons you need to understand. The question is: did you behave this way with your mother as well, or was something missing that you're trying to get now as an adult?

No, my mom never gave me any attention. I behaved this way to people outside my family, strictly. I've been doing it all my life, less so now that I have become more aware of it. However I know it's something I shouldn't repress, this will only get solved when I get to the crux of the issue.

I think unconsciously I gave up trying to get this kind of attention from my parents and started looking elsewhere. In a weird way I act more normal around my parents.

>>38193305
>Should I tell my therapist I feel this way? Is it bad that I want to be psychotic?

Do tell her. You don't want to be psychotic, you want to assess your condition by going medless for a while, which is a completely sensible thing to consider. Surely there's a way to stay at a mental hospital for a while, for observation. Ask her about that.

>>38193317

OK. Would you say you don't feel like you can be liked by others if you behave "normally"?

Also, can you detail what this behaviour is exactly? Can you describe what you do and say?

>>38193340
Yeah she suggested that I stay in a hospital if I want to go off all my medication, but then my psychologist said that's a terrible idea because I could go fully psychotic and never get better. I don't know if hes telling the truth or not, but I will ask the psychiatrist if I can go to a hospital for a while

>>38193392
>my psychologist said that's a terrible idea because I could go fully psychotic and never get better.

Your psychologist is not a doctor and I highly doubt that your state would get worse and never change afterwards, especially if your psychiatrist/doctor says otherwise. Psychologists don't study medication and their effects, that's for doctors, psychiatrists.

Do ask your doctor about the stay. Personally, I think it's a good idea, as long as you're supervised with all of it, it's worth doing. Listen to your psychiatrist, she's the expert here.

>>38193362
>Would you say you don't feel like you can be liked by others if you behave "normally"?

Maybe. I should point out that I've only really become conscious of my behaviour until very recently. It's like a bad habit that I know I've indulged in as soon as I've said something/behaved in a certain way. It's kind of like the 'easy option' for me. Instead of taking the risk of being disliked for who I am, I'm taking a surefire way of being liked. Almost like it's comforting.

>>38193362
>Also, can you detail what this behaviour is exactly? Can you describe what you do and say?

Just today for example, I acted dopey in order to make someone laugh. I broke something in my ankle, (I'm wearing a cast) and when I was asked when it would heal I just said I didn't know because the doctor was Indian and I didn't understand him.

To be fair, I couldn't understand him that's the truth but I found out anyway when it would heal from someone else. I dislike the fact that I was being immoderately self-depricating.

>>38193392
Can you find another psychiatrist and ask for a second opinion? Maybe it can help reassuring you that this thing could work.
Also, hello everyone, i think i'll probably lurk for the majority of the night.

>>38193442
Alright nick ill ask about the stay. Youll probably see me in another thread and by that time ill probably have changed my whole perspective on the situation. I just cant make up my mind on anything, ya know? Is that bad?

>>38193469
>when I was asked when it would heal I just said I didn't know because the doctor was Indian and I didn't understand him.

I don't actually see this as being child-like in any way. It sounds like a joke that could be told in a straightforward manner and which would work just fine. I also don't think someone will like you better for making that joke. You didn't tell me who you were talking to, which makes a huge difference. If it's a close friend or a stranger, it's not the same.

Any more examples of this behaviour?

>>38193496
I can ask for another opinion, but as i said in >>38193511 ill probably change my mind again for whatever reason. Is that bad that i change my mind so quickly?

>If you put several people with the same delusion, they will believe that their delusion is indeed completely normal and common.
I think this is why there are many more men like us today. Back in the day when there was no internet, most of us would just get pushed into conformity. Now we have our place where we can voice our ideas that are considered toxic and be safe from any social backlash.

>>38193496

A second opinion is a good idea, but I imagine you'll get the same opinion again.

>>38193511

Your mind exists in a turbulent state with parameters outside of your control. Give yourself some slack, you're a boat on a tempestuous ocean, you do what you can and you're doing very well.

Don't feel ashamed and don't guilt yourself either, you do what you can. You're doing good and making good decisions as well, and you're not alone, your psychiatrist is there for you.

>>38193562
Alright nick ill ask if i can do the hospital stay, even if my dad gets mad at me

File: 1ce17b6495bb9241a69ccccff4cf3971.jpg (56KB, 406x600px) Image search: [Google]

56KB, 406x600px

>>38193556
>I think this is why there are many more men like us today. Back in the day when there was no internet, most of us would just get pushed into conformity.

Yes, and that was good. Many processes that happen between humans, however vile they are, tend to seek that end.

When so many have little empathy here and agree on ridiculous ideas, you guys need someone to tell you just how fucking off the charts you really are. That someone is me.

>not the hero you deserve
>the hero you need

>>38193535
I cannot say anything for sure as i am neither a psychiatrist neither a psychologist. You certainly are not in a great condition, and it obviously has some degrees of importance in this constantly change of mind. But it's also great that you are moving towards a possible solution

Morning Nick and Dan. Been missing this thread the last few days, must be overlooking it somehow.

>>38193532
>I also don't think someone will like you better for making that joke.

This is not something that occured to me. Thank you. It's tiny things like this that once my eyes are opened to it it makes a massive difference to me.

>>38193532
>Any more examples of this behaviour?

Now this will be an odd comparison but I'm not trying to suggest I am psychotic. Ted Bundy used to wear cast's (when he actually had no injury whatsoever) and purposefully be clumsy; like dropping his books in front of women; in order to appear harmless and cute to them, in order to curry their favour. I do this, on a lesser scale mind you.

I hate this about myself, I feel so pathetic when I catch myself doing it.

>>38193612
Thanks zeno, ill ask about the hospital stay like nick suggested

>>38193619
>>38193532

Oh and the Indian thing was with my therapist, who is an older women who is somewhat attractive. I think that's where the motherly thing comes into it...

>>38193604
Yeah most of these processes are practical above all. People talk about swallowing the redpill/blackpill/shitpill or whatever. But the point is, there is a good reason why your parents and everyone else is trying to "bluepill" you. They are trying to make you ignore the injustices and the bad shit in the world, trying to make you not hate women and not be bitter.

They know what they're doing. Problem is, once you break this programming and what's worse, once you reinforce it (which /r9k/ can help you with REAL well) you're fucked. It's very hard to go back to the good programming. And even if you do, you will always know. The damage cannot be undone.

>>38193615
Hey Psycho. How have you been doing?

>>38193615

Hello you. We should find you a sharper name. Psycho is too generic. Let's baptise you tonight. "Psycho" isn't good enough, you deserve better.

Suggestions welcome.

>>38193668
The problem i have with r9k in general is that the so called "redpill" half of the time is a retarded theory that is forced like truth , then repeated enough time to make people forget how stupid it is

>>38193619
>This is not something that occured to me. Thank you. It's tiny things like this that once my eyes are opened to it it makes a massive difference to me.

I have a friend who constantly tries to make jokes, to be liked. I discussed it with him. I asked if he did it to be liked, he pitifully admitted that yes, he did. The thing is, his jokes suck most of the time. I kek because of how it's not funny, but other people don't. After a while, I don't either, actually.

Here's the problem: it looks like you're desperate to be liked, and nobody gets good vibes from that. It's like giving someone a gifts but only so the person likes you in return. Bad vibes. When you tell a joke or give something, it must be completely free of charge, otherwise it's like giving someone a book, and later asking them for the money it cost you.

Focus on this: you're not here to entertain other people. Other people will value your presence for who you are, even if you're not making jokes; in fact, probably more so. You're not a jester. Other people will have a higher opinion of you than you have of yourself, simply because they don't know you and they don't share your negative self-image. Relax in that idea, because it's true.

>>38193736
Well it depends on what you mean. If you mean redpill as in PUA related shit, then yeah that's bullshit.

If you mean the shit about hypergammy, heightism and similar shit, that's pretty much spot on.

>>38193697
Doing relatively well today Dan. Mostly it is just a laid back and relatively calm day.

>>38193706
You are quite correct, Psycho can be quite generic and a problem if any other psychopaths show up. Not sure what else to call myself here though.

Also, I wish to offer evidence of last time as proof of how bad I can be at conversations. The conversation quickly died when we talked about camp fires as I lost the ability to say anything of substance. This seems to be a general problem I have, once I have talked to someone for a bit and we understand each other, it becomes hard to converse about anything.

Hello everyone, hope you are all doing good. Got drunk and thought I'd pop in for a bout of shitposting.

>>38193736
That's honestly an issue of the "redpill" being hijacked by ideologues and other such undesirables who push their opinions and personal views under the guise of truth. These days you can freely ignore anyone using the term.

>>38193619
>Now this will be an odd comparison but I'm not trying to suggest I am psychotic. Ted Bundy used to wear cast's (when he actually had no injury whatsoever) and purposefully be clumsy; like dropping his books in front of women; in order to appear harmless and cute to them, in order to curry their favour. I do this, on a lesser scale mind you.

Yeah, no. Bundy specifically planned out the cast thing so he'd have a reason to ask women to help him carry furniture into his van. He'd have them carry the front end, and once they were deep down the van, he'd close it. The van was set up so the person would be trapped. This was used in Silence of the Lambs.

The major difference here is that Bundy and Buffalo Bill did this to trap a person, to do them harm. You're doing it to be liked. Huge difference. You're not trying to manipulate others, you're trying to make them laugh to be valuable to them.

Don't feel pathetic. Making jokes is fine, that's not the problem, the problem is the angle you use, which changes everything. You can still be funny, but don't be funny TO be liked. That will suck the fun out of any joke.

>>38193642
>Oh and the Indian thing was with my therapist,

How did she react?

>>38193763
So tell me, do you still think that your parents did nothing wrong?

>>38193750
>Other people will have a higher opinion of you than you have of yourself, simply because they don't know you and they don't share your negative self-image. Relax in that idea, because it's true.

That's good, thank you. I have such a weak theory of mind I think it's called. I'm just beginning to learn that other people think differently than I do, better late than never.

What about the acting cute thing? Specifically around women? I do it with my therapist and I can't help it

>>38193817
My mother was quite wrong. My father has made some flaws, he wasn't perfect, but at the end of the day was a good parent.

>>38193668
>They are trying to make you ignore the injustices and the bad shit in the world, trying to make you not hate women and not be bitter.

No. There's a difference between "ignoring injustice" and "not using injustice as an excuse not to give a single fuck". It's not the same.

Not hating women is something you should do for yourself, not just for women. Remember: humans team up in pairs: a man and a woman (usually). Hatred between the sexes is bad for both sexes. You're not supposed to live with your own sex, you're supposed to live with the other one and have a family; this will work better if you don't hate each other and their sex.

The damage can easily be undone. You're saying it can't as yet another lame ass excuse not to try. You bastard.

>>38193856
>No. There's a difference between "ignoring injustice" and "not using injustice as an excuse not to give a single fuck". It's not the same.
I'm not sure I'm following you here. The other part is true for sure, but giving a single fuck about a game that is rigged against you makes very little sense.

>>38193754
>If you mean the shit about hypergammy, heightism and similar shit, that's pretty much spot on.

No, it's not. Don't get me started. "Heightism" sounds like you'd say on Tumblr with blue hair. For fuck's sake, Dan.

>MUH HEIGHTISM

Absolutely NOTHING is kept from anyone because of height except height itself. Plus there are women who like short men because they're more like kids. And you're 178 cm, don't you dare call yourself short, because that's not short, and I've already put a dick in your national average. You're taller than most women in your country, and if height mattered that much, being taller than a woman is all you'd need.

Moreover, you'd not want a woman who's so focused on retarded secondary traits like height, so why are you focused on that?

You keep complaining about women wanting what only shallow idiots would want. If you could actually get with the sort of women you complain about, you'd hate her for only wanting your money, your height, your big cock, your Chadness, etc. It makes no fucking sense.

>take the Danpill
>hate women
>hate everything
>feel short

>>38193807
>>38193793
>Don't feel pathetic. Making jokes is fine, that's not the problem, the problem is the angle you use, which changes everything. You can still be funny, but don't be funny TO be liked. That will suck the fun out of any joke.

I do realise this already I'm actually a lot better at suppressing it. When I joke it comes from a good place more often than not now. However when I'm around women it all goes out of the window, I slip into old ways when cos I get anxious.

>>38193807
I didn't hear a laugh, I told her as I was turning away from her. When she asks about my ankle at the end of every session she always has this look on her face of amused bewilderment. Hope that makes sense. I fell off my bike, that's how I broke it.

One time my stomach rumbled and I assured her it wasn't a fart, but I acted more embarrassed than I actually was. God I sound like a real autist kek

>>38193763
>it becomes hard to converse about anything.

Don't worry about it. Silence is best appreciated by great friends.

http://www.dimfuture.net/starwars/random/generate.php

Get a name.

>>38193817
>So tell me, do you still think that your parents did nothing wrong?

If Dan does his usual rant AND Psy does his about his parents having done nothing wrong, I am literally going to explode. Please don't, both of you.

>>38193826
>What about the acting cute thing? Specifically around women? I do it with my therapist and I can't help it

Describe it for me. It's too abstract otherwise. "Acting cute" doesn't tell me what it is. I can act cute for keks, but it won't be the way you do.

Details!

>>38193848
>but at the end of the day was a good parent.

Fine line here. The important point isn't whether you think they were good parents but the kind of damage they did to you and how to identify it and get better. I'm very practical about this stuff.

>>38193929
>but giving a single fuck about a game that is rigged against you makes very little sense.

You don't get to choose whether you play the game or not. Whether it is rigged or not remains to be discussed. If it is rigged against you, it is also rigged against others in your favour. So that's a moot point and means nothing.

You must stay absolutely logical the whole time; anything non-logical will be your demons speaking.

>>38193956
Lando Pau-no-rego. Sounds like some weird pasta of Lando's noodles.

>>38193983
Oh, I was worried about that. Let's hope Dan doesn't ask the wrong questions.

>>38193938
Honestly, let's just leave this be. I know I started it this time. I shouldn't have. Fuck it.

>>38194009
That is exactly the thing. I feel they did no damage to me. My mother was a hassle to deal with, but even she didn't give me damage, and my father in no way damaged me.

>>38193996
>>38193951
fuck off robot smd

>>38193951
>However when I'm around women it all goes out of the window, I slip into old ways when cos I get anxious.

Let's focus on why you fear women. No shame, let it all out.

>When she asks about my ankle at the end of every session she always has this look on her face of amused bewilderment.

You sure that's not her way to show concern and care? What's to be amused or bewildered about a cast?

>One time my stomach rumbled and I assured her it wasn't a fart, but I acted more embarrassed than I actually was. God I sound like a real autist kek

Oh God, I am laughing. That is a hell of an embarrassing joke to make. That makes you an autismo hero in my book. But yeah, don't. Don't do that! Say, "I'm hungry, as you can hear." Not, "Worry not, fairy lady, it is not the echoes of my sphincter that reach your soft ears! It is but the thunder of my belly!"

>>38193938
Well, maybe being gay was the redpill since the beginning for me then. It prevented me for falling for the height/chad/every meme to hard. On the other hand it can be super stressful sometimes

>>38194039
>Lando Pau-no-rego. Sounds like some weird pasta of Lando's noodles.

We can't have Lando, or I'd think of you as a smooth black man with a moustache. No can do here.

>Oh, I was worried about that. Let's hope Dan doesn't ask the wrong questions.

Both of you are here, preparing the perfect storm... Exciting tension. I'll try to keep it cool on my end.

>>38194119
>Lando
One that seems to be a con-man but just wants to sell you his chicken noodle soup.

>Tension
Stay calm Nick. We need you sane.

>>38194052
>Honestly, let's just leave this be. I know I started it this time. I shouldn't have. Fuck it.

You make me feel like I'm in a homo relationship. My boyfriend is a grumpy motherfucker and I always have to reassure him like a faggot. He likes when I shout at him; he keeps spewing redpills all over the place while I shout good sense at him, with some insults, and then we have angry sex and everything is fine again.

Danny Kun, you are gonna make me blush.

My life was ruined when i was raped as kid by older girls. Managed to escape second rape attempt by women thanks to my older friend. A dirty little seed called depression was planted that year. Little bubbly kid slowly become a tv addict. Then i got my 1st console ps1. Then came the pc. After that that little seed sprouted and became lethargic depression. Failed school and went to a special school. Everything was too easy there. Aced all my tests with little effort. Little plant was dead. Finished school and got myself a trade skill. Again test were very easy for some reason. Got a little paper and went to work. Worked for 2 years. It came back with vengeance. Failed to come to work too many times. Fired and shame over 9000. A year living like parasite. Shit wilted away. Got another job. Worked for 5 months. Had very good company there. Quit job for no reason. Pest came. Tried to hang myself. Failed. Month later cut both wrists up horizontaly and verticly outside. Gave little smilies on the next. Didnt die cuz temp was too cold. Called the hospital. Next day mom, dad and sis visited me in my hosp. room. Acted like nothing happend. The little piece of me died that day. Got work 4 months later. Found the cause of my depression. My own parents. Alcoholic father, useless mother and gogurl Sister who left for diff. city. Parents live with me in a rented appartment cuz parents suck at handling money. Pantiently waiting for my parents death. Wont bother looking for women until then. Still 24. Moral of the story start looking for cause of your problem before it kills you.

>>38194154
No. I'm just tired. We've had this conversation too many times. I'm just not going to change what I believe. I'm just tired of arguing against the same normie platitudes. And always ending up with the same conclusion. Let's just leave it. It's a waste of time.

>>38194064
>That is exactly the thing. I feel they did no damage to me.

If you parents had blinded you as a baby, you wouldn't think they did any damage either. If they had caused you to blunt your emotions as a defense mechanism, you wouldn't either.

>>38194067
>fuck off robot smd

Beg your pardon? What's "smd"? And who are you telling to fuck off? I'm confused.

neck* not next and i have no more friends.

>>38194227
See the thing is that even after these threads, I still believe I am a lot more emotional than I sound.

>>38194098
>Let's focus on why you fear women. No shame, let it all out.

I couldn't tell you why. I'm scared of fucking up and getting rejected. Girls get away with acting like such cunts, at least some of them anyway. I feel so nervous, I put so much pressure on myself to do well, her not really being into me feels like a fucking travesty.

>>38194098
>You sure that's not her way to show concern and care? What's to be amused or bewildered about a cast?

I think she has this 'boy's will be boys' kind of attitude about it. I'm not a facially blind autist, I can tell she finds it amusing, in a harmless way mind you.

>>38194098
>Oh God, I am laughing. That is a hell of an embarrassing joke to make. That makes you an autismo hero in my book. But yeah, don't. Don't do that! Say, "I'm hungry, as you can hear." Not, "Worry not, fairy lady, it is not the echoes of my sphincter that reach your soft ears! It is but the thunder of my belly!"

No no, I wasn't trying to make a joke out of it. I was saying like 'oh no I didn't fart' and putting on this awkward, nervous teenager persona. I was almost making a meta joke, creating a situation by acting in a dishonest way so that the person in question would believe my illusion of what actually took place. kind of like when the cat in Shrek does that thing where it makes it's eyes big to gain affection. Except I might be doing it for sex...

In short, irl shitposting. Like acting dumb on the internet for (You)'s

>>38194199

Good moral of the story, kek-approved.

This is a heavy story, very heavy.

First thing I want to say is not to sacrifice your life for your parents, as they have already done enough damage to you, and you deserve to live. They are the parents, not you. Don't carry a burden that kills you.

Have you ever been in therapy for your trauma?

We could do some work on that. You need a name.

I call you Smileys.

>>38194245
Getting past the robot? smd is suck my dick. Making an original comment so I could direct you to a point you asked for which you may have looked over. Not directed at you

>>38194211
>I'm just not going to change what I believe.

Some wise man said that listening was being ready to change. If you aren't ready to change, you aren't listening.

>normie platitudes

You always use the same exact wording for this shit. Sometimes you seem aware of what you're doing, sometimes not.

I'm just about to put on my boxing gloves, baby.

Your arguments don't make sense, Dan. You can't be so blind as not to see that.

>>38194305

That's because you have no perspective. You may be emotional, but you can't know how it compares to others, I'd imagine.

>>38194316
>I couldn't tell you why. I'm scared of fucking up and getting rejected.

That's what you need to master. Don't fear rejection, welcome it as the sign that you're better off not getting involved with that particular girl.

Girls who act like cunts aren't girls you want to be with, right? So consider it an easy sign that tells you who to ignore.

>I think she has this 'boy's will be boys' kind of attitude about it.

That sounds almost condescending. I question whether this is the best therapist for you.

>>38194316
>No no, I wasn't trying to make a joke out of it. I was saying like 'oh no I didn't fart' and putting on this awkward, nervous teenager persona.

Oh God, you weren't even going for the joke? This is advanced autismo right here! I love it but Jesus Christ...

>In short, irl shitposting. Like acting dumb on the internet for (You)'s

You are quite fun, I must say. What's the cat's name in Shrek?

>>38194366
That can be quite correct indeed. I just feel my uncontrolled bouts of emotion that leak out to the point of being overbearing are more than the average individual.

>>38194340

All right. Did I respond to everything? Sometimes I respond to one post with many of mine, to avoid the text limit.

>>38194438

Yes, typically anger and rage, I presume.

>>38194345
>Your arguments don't make sense, Dan. You can't be so blind as not to see that.

My entire argument is that some people get born with value and some don't. Not having value severely inhibits you and limits your success that you can gain through hard work severely.

People will see fit to step on you for not being born with value, people who got born with value will get more out of life and will consider it just when it's not.

>>38194484
>value

Use of abstract term to make a counter less likely. Be more precise. "Value" can mean anything here.

IT'S ON, BITCH. IT IS SO FUCKING ON.

>>38194426
>This is advanced autismo right here! I love it but Jesus Christ...

Tell me your honest then. You can't question whether I should reconsider my therapist because she's condescending and then act like this.

She is good, she's helped me out and I think a small thing like thinking I'm an idiot for fucking up my ankle is something I could just tell her about and not dump her for.

In fact, I think I anticipated her thinking I was an idiot for how I broke my ankle so I acted stupid in order to soften the blow.

>>38194426
>You are quite fun, I must say.
What do you mean by this?

>>38194497
Value is either good genes (height, looks), wealth and status (gained through family) or a great talent for something (genes).

>>38194317
Visited one for several month when i failed school. I am emotionaly stunted and learned that i have low social iq when mandatory military recruitment psyh. did the tests. Failed ofcourse. Cant explain shit to people

For reasons unknown, my case was transferred to a different psychiatrist whom called me in yesterday. We had a conversation about my issues about the same length as the previous one where I more or less just repeated myself.

This one said she saw clear signs of autism in my facial expressions, body language and demeanor so now I don't know what to believe. Since I don't experience any of the other typical traits (obsessive interests, childhood behavioral issues, compulsiveness towards routine and order) there's going to be a more thorough investigation ahead.

Put in yet another waiting queue, my fucking God.

>>38194498
>You can't question whether I should reconsider my therapist because she's condescending and then act like this.

I meant this in a good spirit. I'm not condescending. I'm sorry if it didn't come across. If you'd prefer me to stay serious the entire time, I can do so.

>She is good, she's helped me out and I think a small thing like thinking I'm an idiot for fucking up my ankle is something I could just tell her about and not dump her for.

Absolutely. I had assumed, based on what you said, that she might look at you as if you were some awkward kid. If it's just this one event, it's no big deal, but if it transpires in other things she says and does, that'd be a problem.

Regardless, you know how you feel with her and that's the important part.

>I think I anticipated her thinking I was an idiot for how I broke my ankle so I acted stupid in order to soften the blow.

Softening the blow by preemptively confirming her misconception? That is a hell of a twist.

>What do you mean by this?

Quite simply that I enjoy your presence. I like you, basically.

>>38192581
i posted there a few days ago
the feeling strange thingy actually got worse or its just me?, when i think about it gets worse and i feel like everything is less real but it only seems to happens when i think about it. im getting more worried about this

>>38194526
>Value is either good genes (height, looks)

You're 178, you were blessed genetically. As to looks, 90% of looks isn't genetics but how you dress, cut your hair, take care of yourself, etc. Moreover, since you don't send a pic of your face, I assume you aren't ugly at all. In other words, you have nothing here in terms of not being "of value".

>I am emotionaly stunted and learned that i have low social iq when mandatory military recruitment psyh.

This is true, but it doesn't bind you to necessary obstacles. And you can get healed, no doubt.

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Does anyone have a link to that stress-anxiety-depression test that's been posted here quite a few times?

>>38194544
>whom called

Who called*

"Whom" isn't a fancy way of saying "who", it's the grammatical object version of "who", which is otherwise a subject.

"The man who called me is nice."

"Who" here is the subject of the verb "called".

"The man whom I liked is nice."

Here, "whom" isn't the subject of "liked"; "I" is the subject of liked. That's how this works.

Forgive me, I'm an English teacher.

>This one said she saw clear signs of autism in my facial expressions,

I'm skeptical about that. What did she mean?

>>38194599
I could have had much higher value. What I have means I have good capacity to be average. Could have been much more. The things I work hard for are what many get by default.

Also saying that 90% of looks isn't genetic is very courageous. And by that I mean wrong.

>>38194542

Forgive me! I somehow read your post as Dan's post! My bad!

Can you detail what you mean by emotionally stunted?

>>38194572

See derealisation. Thinking about it might make you more anxious, which makes you more derealised. Just flow with it, it won't last forever.

>>38194612

I have all the tests.

https://www.depression-anxiety-stress-test.org/take-the-test.html

>>38194664
Thanks. Wondering how my mental issues have developed.

>>38194643
>I could have had much higher value.

Look here:

"Is this shit?"

"No, it's good."

"Ah, but then, it could be better."

See?

>The things I work hard for are what many get by default.

Nobody gets German as a second language by default. So you're wrong.

>Also saying that 90% of looks isn't genetic is very courageous. And by that I mean wrong.

Well then you need to watch a few makeover shows and adjust your opinion.

Especially for men, all you have to do is not be a fatass and work out your muscles and you can look like a Greek god. There's literally no excuse there.

>>38194612
You mean this? I remember doing it so maybe is the one you are looking for
https://www.depression-anxiety-stress-test.org/take-the-test.html
>>38194643
And your solution is? For what is worth, i think you can either accept it, wait for genetic therapy (that will not change your physical aspect), or complain endlessly. Everyone wants more they are given, even your chad

>>38194721
That's the one, but you were too slow. Thanks anyway.

>>38194561
>Quite simply that I enjoy your presence. I like you, basically.

Cool good. I was thinking for a second you thought I was a troll when I made it appear that I told you to fuck off.

>Absolutely. I had assumed, based on what you said, that she might look at you as if you were some awkward kid. If it's just this one event, it's no big deal, but if it transpires in other things she says and does, that'd be a problem.

I should mention I'm quite young. But yeah I can tell she is slightly up her own arse, she talked more than I did the last session which I disliked. She is well intentioned though, and she always reminds me to tell her to stop doing something if I dislike it. Criticism benefits her essentially.

>Softening the blow by preemptively confirming her misconception? That is a hell of a twist.

I wouldn't say preemptively. It's like 'oh shit, she thinks I'm retarded, best act like more of a retard to cover my trails.' I don't know why I play pretend with myself, like it's reassuring somehow that 'ha, jokes on them I was only pretending to be retarded' when in actually fact I am a clumsy person who get's into ridiculous situations.

>>38194561
>I meant this in a good spirit. I'm not condescending. I'm sorry if it didn't come across. If you'd prefer me to stay serious the entire time, I can do so.

It felt condescending, but don't sweat.

>>38194644
I cant express myself. I find humor when bad things happen to somebody. Heck my jokes are dark at best, mental hospital patient at worst

>>38194709
>See?
See what exactly? This doesn't mean that being average is something to be content with.

>Especially for men, all you have to do is not be a fatass and work out your muscles and you can look like a Greek god. There's literally no excuse there.
We've been over this. Height, chin, jaw, face shape, shoulder to hip width ratio. So many things that break you.

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>>38192581
>all this trip faggotry
what's wrong with you.

>>38194721
>And your solution is? For what is worth, i think you can either accept it, wait for genetic therapy (that will not change your physical aspect), or complain endlessly. Everyone wants more they are given, even your chad
That's the point. There is none. I will be complaining endlessly and hating everyone because everyone will be treating me in accordance with my value. So in other words treating me worse than if I was born with very good value.

And I will just keep being this way.

>>38194634
Shit, I always confuse the two. I always forget the rule. Good thing we're not speaking German or your eyes would bleed.

>I'm skeptical about that. What did she mean?
First psychiatrist didn't write anything in my journal, but the second one did. Let me quote, and pardon if the translation from my native language is shitty:

>Basal person-to-person interaction
Acceptable formal contact, lacking emotional contact.
>Conversation and discussion
Patient delivers curt responses to questions. Does not speak spontaneously.
>Orientation
Full function.
>Psychmotoric function
Lacking facial mimics and body language.
>Mood
Completley neutral. Lacking of all affect.
>Delusions
No psychotic episodes.
>Suicudiality
Denies thoughts, plans and wishes.

And its very hard for me to bond with people. I dont remember majority of my classmates names and faces considering that i will probably never meet them again so my brain just slowly erased them

>>38194761
>she talked more than I did the last session which I disliked

What did she talk about all that time?

>It's like 'oh shit, she thinks I'm retarded, best act like more of a retard to cover my trails.'

That doesn't actually make sense. It's like being a ninha, accidentally making a noise, which guards hear, and suddenly deciding to make more noise. It doesn't cover your trail, it only makes you look more like a retard, so why do it?

>I was only pretending to be retarded' when in actually fact I am a clumsy person who get's into ridiculous situations.

You're like Meme-Man. 4chan is turning into reality. Very interesting way to function, though. Do you see how it doesn't quite work in the end?

>>38194768

I have just the test for you.

I predict high levels of psychopath, low to below average narcissism, and above average machiavellianism.

http://www.celebritytypes.com/dark-triad/test.php

>>38194807
If you feel like cheating the system, plastic surgery could be a solution. Speaking in an unironic way btw, women get it and i never understand why men aren't supposed to if they cannot cope with their physical aspects.

>>38194862
That doesn't change anything. The problem is that people in general act like this. The problem is that there is a hierarchy. The problem is evolution. That some animals/people get born only to never procreate. They are the side effect, furthering the species by their misery. And people who got lucky perpetuate this misery. That's why they deserve to die.

>>38194771
>See what exactly? This doesn't mean that being average is something to be content with.

Dan, you don't have a choice. You keep saying "It's not something I have control over," so why do you keep acting like you can accept or refuse these things? Some things you can't change or choose, so work with what you've got!

There's nothing to be content about. We've discussed this a million times, but not understanding this on purpose is pure mental illness, so cut it out.

If you play the lottery, and you win a sausage, instead of a million dollars, what is your discontent going to do about it? Nothing. Enjoy your sausage and better luck next time. No need to waste energy on feeling bad about having lost the million dollars. Don't make the sausage taste bad.

>Height, chin, jaw, face shape, shoulder to hip width ratio. So many things that break you.

None of that breaks you. You really think a woman who's worth her salt will reject you for a jaw line?

>>38194790

It's the nature of the thread. Regulars get trips so we all get to know each other. It's much more enjoyable that way, I find. It's different, but enjoyable.

>>38194807
>So in other words treating me worse than if I was born with very good value.

Meanwhile, in reality, everyone treats you super nice despite your shit behaviour.

AKA: this thread.

Please ponder over this for as long as you need.

>>38194820

All right. I'm not sure if that's enough to count as autism rather than some other conditions.

Do you think this matches you?

>>38194902
>You keep saying "It's not something I have control over," so why do you keep acting like you can accept or refuse these things?
Being born inferior is one thing. Being treated like an inferior by people around you is another thing.

>None of that breaks you. You really think a woman who's worth her salt will reject you for a jaw line?
How easy must it be for you. When a woman acts in a way that doesn't fit your narrative, she just isn't worth her salt. So simple. Yet so wrong.

>>38194836
>You're like Meme-Man. 4chan is turning into reality. Very interesting way to function, though. Do you see how it doesn't quite work in the end?

Yes but it is an irrational reflex. Yes I know, I don't like exagerrating the negative aspects of myself like this. I know it's not right. I guess I just need to practice having a clear head and make sure I don't slip into these shit ways of functioning. What do you think? Seems like repression to me, which I hear is bad.

>>38194836
>so why do it?

I wish I knew. It's like trying you're best for some way to appease the person you're with, even if it means immolating yourself. It makes no sense to me, I just feel like shit afterwards.

>>38194836
>What did she talk about all that time?

She know's I've been reading psychology, and I told her that I didn't know how to go forward. I'm starting to get a grip on the problems in my life, the trouble is making them more conscious i.e. putting them into concrete terms that I can understand. This is what she was trying to help me with.

There are other problems I want to talk to her about, and I will talk to her about her condescension.

>>38194931
That's because you haven't seen me. You don't know what I look like. You have no face to connect to my posts. If you had it'd be a whole other story.

>>38194942
Yeah. I can consciously add intonations, body language and facial expressions when I speak but that'll burn me out of the conversation within 5 minutes.

>>38194826

Do you like being around other people?

>>38194897
>The problem is that people in general act like this.

They don't. You speak as if you had travelled the world and spoken heart to heart with countless humans. You haven't. You don't know. You don't have enough empathy to know what most people even feel, much less think.

Your beliefs are completely off the chart, Dan.

CARING ANGER RISING.

>>38194975
And i tough that kalokagathia was an ancient Greek thing. And i can understand that some people may have a genetic advantage over some other, but the idea that this other exists only to "further the species with their misery" is, and i'm sorry to say this, stupid. I don't feel better because retarded people exist, and normal, non narcissistic people don't feel superior to everyone else because they are smart/beautiful/rich. Asshole one obviously exist, but they are not the norm

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Is this test inaccurate or have I just lost sight of what's considered normal?
How do I get interest in living my life, instead of escapism and worthless dreams that go nowhere and can't be fulfilled?

>>38194949
>Being born inferior is one thing. Being treated like an inferior by people around you is another thing.

And neither is defined by you.

>How easy must it be for you.

Yeah right... Implying I haven't spent months detailing how hard it was.

>When a woman acts in a way that doesn't fit your narrative, she just isn't worth her salt.

It is simple. Don't be obtuse. If a woman acts like a whore, is she worthwhile to you? No. That's all there is to it. Why do you make it more complicated when it's simple? Why do you make it simple when it's complicated? To have excuses.

Your excuses are your defence mechanism. It's how you protect yourself from being the bad person who doesn't try. It's how you blame everyone else to get rid of any responsibility.

No woman would reject you for a jaw line. And if her opinion is completely about such things, why would you be interested in her? Would you want to marry someone who mostly cares about your jaw line or face? Would you?

>>38195047
They do. Sure if you want to claim that I can't have any opinion on the matter (other than yours) unless I have spoken to every human on the earth, then go ahead.

But what I said makes perfect sense. It's what drives us forward as a species. There is a big variance in males in terms of intelligence and many other things. Males are the expandable beings where nature tries things out. Some mutations may be succesful but most will not be. And these males are only failed experiments and they will die and thus help the humanity. It's that simple.

>>38194972
>What do you think? Seems like repression to me, which I hear is bad.

I feel like it's overcompensation, that you're trying to react to things you should just let go. Overcorrection, if you will.

Do you often say "I'm sorry"?

>>38194975
>That's because you haven't seen me.

I can assure you seeing you wouldn't change anything in that regard.

>You don't know what I look like. You have no face to connect to my posts. If you had it'd be a whole other story.

Challenge accepted. Don't pussy out this time.

>>38194990

Sounds more like psychopathy than autism, though it could be either. How well did you perform on the empathy test?

>>38195074
>normal, non narcissistic people don't feel superior to everyone else because they are smart/beautiful/rich
They do. It's there if you really listen to them, they know just how lucky they are, how much better they are. To them us inferiors are like NPCs. Might as well not be there. Of course this isn't said explicitly most of the time, but it's there. No doubt.

>>38195106
Inferiority can not be defined easily, just like many other concepts, which doesn't mean they have no value at all.

>It's how you blame everyone else to get rid of any responsibility.
How many times have I heard this gem. Others treat me poorly for my inferiority, so they are to blame for many things.

>And if her opinion is completely about such things, why would you be interested in her? Would you want to marry someone who mostly cares about your jaw line or face? Would you?
You see it through pink lenses. Women want the best genes possible for their children. Easy as that.

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>>38195019
Yes, when the topic interest me otherwise no.

>>38195091
>Is this test inaccurate or have I just lost sight of what's considered normal?

This test is pretty damn accurate. Tests used by therapists are a lot like it, and for having seen dozens of anons doing it here, I can say it is pretty spot on. So yes, you've lost sight of what's normal, but that's what depression does to you. You forget that happiness is your normal state. Was your normal state.

You need to face your demons, which may be invisible for now. Take a name and join us in our epic adventures of self-discovery, narc-busting, Borderline explorations and memes.

>>38195118
>I feel like it's overcompensation, that you're trying to react to things you should just let go. Overcorrection, if you will.

I think it's compensation. Making someone laugh at my clumsiness is better than the mere feeling of having this flaw exposed bare.

>Do you often say "I'm sorry"?

Not really. This is something I have curbed, I used to.

Thank you for talking me through this, I feel like I have learnt a lot about this behaviour. From now on, I think I should stop this compensatory behaviour and gradually get used to the fear of being exposed when I inevitably do some stupid shit.

>>38195112
>They do. Sure if you want to claim that I can't have any opinion on the matter (other than yours) unless I have spoken to every human on the earth, then go ahead.

It doesn't need to be that extreme, but how do you explain that what you say doesn't match what happens, then?

According to you, unless I'm 2 meters tall, have alot of money, a perfect jaw line, etc, I can't get the interest of worthy women (and unworthy ones), so how come I did?

What prevents you from what you want isn't other people, it's you, and you know it.

>>38195151
I'm not prone to spontaneous outbursts of anger, manipulation and lying though. Can you link again?

>>38195214
>What prevents you from what you want isn't other people, it's you, and you know it.
You are completely right. I should be willing to accept that I will not be seen as attractive as some other men because of things I can not change. I am also expected to be okay with this and not hate people for all the unjust shit they do to inferior males. But I'm not willing to do that. I am the problem. Sure. And I will keep being one.

>>38195180
And still, they can be unhappy as everyone else. One of my best friends is pretty rich and depressed on the verge of suicide.
Also, knowing that you are lucky/intelligent/even beautiful is supposed to be a bad thing now? Or you mean it in a "i rub it in your face so you cam feel even more inferior" way?

>>38195195
>You need to face your demons, which may be invisible for now.
How do I go about discovering those demons? I'm pretty helpless when it comes to understanding my own emotions.

>>38195349
It's not knowing that is a bad thing. Simply being lucky is bad. People who got lucky shouldn't exist. They don't deserve what they have. And they will even will even claim they worked for it. They deserve to die. All of them.

evening all.
i've been to busy playing games half the night to really pay attention here. but it seems to be business as usual.

Im off to sleep, Ciao

>>38195385
Lucky is such a subjectively concept that no one will survive an hypothetical purge according to your rule, except the most unlucky dying child in Ugandan. I get the hate, but it's really so much better keep fueling it instead of accepting that there are things that have you cannot control?

>>38195492
Hey there. What kind of game are you playing?

>>38195510
It doesn't matter what's better or what's worse. I'm not alive. Never have been.

>>38195529
PUGB with some friends. it was actually a lot better than i expected. the rush when you're getting close to a win rivals the vidya feel of when i was a kid.
recommending it if you got someone to team up with

>>38195572
Judging by your definition of lucky then around 95% of humanity should be killed and if whatever is left is equal or lesser than you, humanity would extinct fairly quickly.

Sorry for being slow, I had to finish an e-mail. To someone.

>>38195180
>They do. It's there if you really listen to them, they know just how lucky they are, how much better they are. To them us inferiors are like NPCs. Might as well not be there. Of course this isn't said explicitly most of the time, but it's there. No doubt.

Projecting your own narcissism on others. Dan, you're the one who thinks he doesn't get what he deserves.

>Inferiority can not be defined easily, just like many other concepts, which doesn't mean they have no value at all.

If you can't define it, it probably doesn't exist.

It's a cop out to save your core beliefs.

>How many times have I heard this gem.

It's your gem. Who treats you poorly?

>You see it through pink lenses. Women want the best genes possible for their children. Easy as that.

You didn't answer my question, at all. Questions aren't a point of view. Answer the question.

Men also want the best genes possible for their children, so that's a moot point. It really means nothing.

>>38195626
My pc is potato tier, so probably it will never run on it. As for the friends part, atm i'm having difficulty finding a way to play overwatch because one of the players I used to play with works overnight and the other most of the time is too tired to play because he studied like a madman all day.
Single player master-race is the future

>>38195183

Damn, I was spot on with my prediction.

>>38195197

Good!

Focus on this: making mistakes is normal, everyone does it, it doesn't have to be an opening in your fortress. It just happens. Keep cool. Don't feel like everything will collapse because of a silly thing.

I've seen CEO's clumsily fuck up their cellphones and acting like nothing had happened, because they don't give a fuck. They're right, it happens, it doesn't matter. How you react to clumsiness matters more than the clumsiness itself. If you make it a big thing, it will feel like an important thing to others. If not, no one will care.

>>38195788
>Dan, you're the one who thinks he doesn't get what he deserves.
Exactly.

>It's your gem. Who treats you poorly?
Everyone. Ever heard of halo effect? Of course you have.

>Men also want the best genes possible for their children, so that's a moot point. It really means nothing.
How exactly. Only the top men can really choose. Otherwise women are the selectors.

>>38195738
Is this someone the one i think it is? (god i seriously hope this phrase makes sense, i noticed that when i'm tired I go for complex phrase that i try to translate directly form italian. With terrible results)

>>38195227

https://psychology-tools.com/empathy-quotient/

>>38195268

> I should be willing to accept that I will not be seen as attractive as some other men because of things I can not change.

This is straight out of your ass. How would you know what a woman likes? Tastes vary a lot. You don't have to accept anything because it's not your choice. We've already discussed this many times. You don't get to choose what others like, one way or the other.

>I am also expected to be okay with this and not hate people for all the unjust shit they do to inferior males

Nobody expects you to do anything, Dan. Nobody even knows what you do. You do what you want, but your choice is bad for YOU. You're just putting a dick in your life. This bothers absolutely nobody but you and those who care for you. It's not a problem to anyone else if you'd rather stay grumpy and isolated.

You're just putting dicks in your life.

>>38195362
>How do I go about discovering those demons? I'm pretty helpless when it comes to understanding my own emotions.

I'm good at that shit.

Describe your current symptoms.

>>38195799
that's tough. good gaming friends is hard to come by.
do you have any single player to recommend? im done with dark souls now and i kinda feel my desire to play single play diminishing. pretty much only been gaming as a way to socialize

>>38195738
>>38194438
did psycho get a new name? if not i'd like to call him Winter coat

>>38195385
>People who got lucky shouldn't exist.

I want you to stare at this sentence until you see the problem. The problem is you're bitter and jealous and a faggot. Dan, you're someone's lucky bastard too. You have legs, all your limbs, a cock that works, intelligence, etc.

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Evening all.

Hey Atlas! Take in any more of those hamburgers and you'll have G20 protesters and police clashing outside your house
Bit of a reach this one, I'll admit

>>38195507

Nighty.

>>38195572

Time to live, Dan, time to live.

Going to remove my lenses, might take a long time. BRB if all goes well.

>>38195956
I'm going to sleep. Good night.

I feel sorry for wasting your time. I'm not going to stop being bitter and hateful. Shouldn't have engaged in this conversation. Anyways, good bye.

>>38195913
I'm playing dragon age inquisition now. Is not a masterpiece but it's cozy enough imho.
Good single player games are, from what i have heard: the Witcher 3, nier automata, and personally i'll go for persona 5 when i have the money and the time to spare.

Fuck off with this gay shit plz

Panic, I can't remove this shit.

>>38196071
Fucking kill yourself already, nobody cares about your incompetence-related life struggles

Hey guys

Recently, I've been feeling like I have crazy high anxiety. Like, I'm beginning to become paranoid of everyone, including my parents. I have faint, fleeting suspicions that everything is tainted and that I shouldn't take any food substance. I don't feel comfortable outside, because I feel like I'm going to get beaten up out of nowhere. I bought a phone from some dude on Craigslist and I immediately thought he was gonna follow me home and mug me. I've also been having really disturbing thoughts peeking in out of nowhere. I think it might be sleep issues, but im not sure.

>>38196013
i'll look into them, thanks! though i have this romantic fantasy that i've grown tired of single player simply because i wish for something more in life. but who knows.

>>38195854
>Exactly.

That means you're the narc, silly. You think you're better than what you have, that everyone owes you somehow, etc. That you don't have the deal you deserve because others are assholes.

>Everyone. Ever heard of halo effect? Of course you have.

Yeah, and it totally doesn't apply to you. Nobody treats you poorly here. That's a non-response to avoid answering the question.

>Only the top men can really choose. Otherwise women are the selectors.

Then how come every man chooses? Women are the selectors? Only if they choose from lower leagues, just like men. If you were willing to dick some fembots, you'd be swimming in ugly pussy right now, so don't give me that stupid shit.

It's like you only know women from porn sites.

>>38195858
>Is this someone the one i think it is?

How would I know what you think?

>>38195913
>did psycho get a new name? if not i'd like to call him Winter coat

We still don't have a name. Winter Coat is cute.

>>38195987

One day, it'll work. I'll never give up.

>>38196070
>Fuck off with this gay shit plz

Where should we go? Your place?

You sound like you should talk to me.

>>38196119

How wrong you are! People are more interested in my removing lenses than they are in your shit attempt at trolling, faggot.

>>38196233
Human sexuality is female-gated as it is with a great many other animals, if not most. Biologically, women have to be more discerning where reproduction is concerned.

>>38195912
>Describe your current symptoms.
To summarise, depression and light dissociation.
I have no drive for anything and I'm always tired. Nothing in the real world really truly interests, or motivates me and I spent the majority of my time either in my own thoughts or indulging in escapism.
When I think about living my own life, I just find it a complete bother and think I might as well kill myself to get rid of it, since nothing in it seems worthwhile and what I could perceive as worthwhile would require effort and motivation I can't find anywhere.
I'm always slightly dissociated, save for maybe a few minutes right after waking up, but even that seems to become rarer over time. I have trouble truly focusing and feeling the outside world, so it's like instead of living in it, it's like I'm observing it from the outside, without any real emotional connection to it.
I guess I'm also abnormally unemotional and apathetic. Only time I'm not emotionally numb is when I'm getting drunk.

>>38196164

Sounds more like paranoia and delusions than straight anxiety. Consider paranoia and maybe some psychosis. Read about it.

>>38195912
I accidentally the name
>>38196311

>>38196288
I'm not trolling. I want you to kill yourself. You're a tool.

>>38196300

Yeah, and you think that's what happens? How have women been discerning with you? Much?

>>38196311
>Nothing in the real world really truly interests, or motivates me and I spent the majority of my time either in my own thoughts or indulging in escapism.

Read about schizotypal.

How do you feel about other people?

>>38196339
They're operating according to an obsolete model. Hence women picking physically powerful, dangerous men who leave after knocking them up and blacking their eyes.

>>38196330
>I'm not trolling. I want you to kill yourself. You're a tool.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how mad does it make you to know that people care more about my lenses than your life?

More seriously, just show me where I butthurted you and I will kiss it better.

>>38196248
i imagine him as a guy walking around with a winter coat on in the middle of summer. complaining that he cant take the heat as well as everyone else but insisting on wearing the coat since that's what his parents told him.

>>38196391
>where I butthurted
obviously in the butt

>>38196378
>Hence women picking physically powerful, dangerous men who leave after knocking them up and blacking their eyes.

You and Dan are fucking hilarious. Seriously. That's not even how or why some women choose bad partners, you fuckheads.

No model of attraction is obsolete if it makes you attracted.

Most women I know are nothing like what you two describe. They're married with a good guy and they have children. The guys aren't Chads. There's often a huge difference between them, both ways. Hot woman marries a man that's 20 years older than her, and isn't wealthier; fat woman marries an athletic dude; short man marries tall model-like woman, isn't rich, isn't athletic. Etc.

>>38196433

OK, I'm sold. Winter Coat it is.

>>38196445

All right. Not my favourite place to kiss kiss but if that's where you want it have it.

Hey Nick, are you even qualified to be a therapist?

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This has to be one of the most retarded things i've read, does people really think that attractiveness equals perfect traits?

>>38196518

Officially? No. I'm working on it, however. Only a matter of time. Is there anything you'd like to discuss?

>>38196368
>Read about schizotypal
I don't think I have the kind of "magical thinking" that's described there.
>How do you feel about other people?
I dont, really. It might be skewed because I haven't really interacted outside my family in a month or two. What I feel of other people is mostly annoyance at stupidity, or some kind of mixture of amusement and interest in someone who is entertaining. Like a character in a novel, that sort of thing.

>>38196568

No, it's just a minor effect, but Dan milks that shit like a motherfucker because it "confirms" his core beliefs.

>>38196588

Read about schizoid. I used to confuse the two a lot.

I think my emotional development was retarded when I was liike 5 or something. Is this a condition or something? I'm just starting to realise how much of a child I actually am. I need to read up on this.

>>38196626
>Read about schizoid
At least based on the Wikipedia article and Webmd it seems to match.
>The Classification of Mental and Behavioural Disorders of ICD-10 lists schizoid personality disorder under (F60.1).[35]
>It is characterized by at least four of the following criteria:
I think I match seven out of four criteria.
>Emotional coldness, detachment or reduced affect.
>Limited capacity to express either positive or negative emotions towards others.
>Consistent preference for solitary activities.
>Very few, if any, close friends or personal relationship, and a lack of desire for such.
>Taking pleasure in few, if any, activities.
>Indifference to social norms and conventions.
>Preoccupation with fantasy and introspection.
What now?

>>38196667

It's possible. What happened when you were 5?

>>38196793
>I think I match seven out of four criteria.

Seven out of four? That's... a lot.

At least you found out a potential name to your condition!

I don't know if there's a therapy for this. What would you need to improve your life?

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Hey Nick at what time do you usually post these threads ?
First time I check it and am interested in reading more but have to sleep soon.

>>38196803
My dad left. Then I was stuck with a mom I hated.

See the way I'm speaking? I'm still upset over this shit. I've been thinking about how my therapist was smirking about my injury and I felt so fucking angry and bitter about it. I don't know what's going on

>>38196845

It depends on the day. Usually in the evening my time (Switzerland) but sometimes in the morning. I have to sleep soon as well, so you'll see me around.

Maybe we should work on something where you guys get a warning that the thread is open. Any clues?

>>38196855

Bit Borderliny, you easily imagine ill intentions in others. You're still sore from being abandoned by your father, and you hate your mother. That's a lot to work with.

If you're upset over something, there's a reason. You need to dig.

>>38196908
A discord maybe ?

>>38196824
>At least you found out a potential name to your condition!
That is a positive. I'll need to read up on it.
>I don't know if there's a therapy for this. What would you need to improve your life?
Warp into a different reality, die, receive powers that allow me to abandon society without effort. I'm lost on this question exactly. I don't know what to do and so far I'm just drifting forward in life based on how my surroundings push me. I have no realistic plans or ideas on how I could live a satisfying life, save for getting on NEETbux, wasting away until my parents die and jumping off a building.

i love your work, Nick. you singlehandedly contained all the faggots from /r9k/

>>38196927

I actually have it, so it's a possibility. I'm not sure how it works for groups. I have Discord on my phone, which is where everyone has it, I suppose.

>>38196942

How about some realistic ways to improve your life? What do you want?

Do you want a woman? A great job? Fun activities? What do you live for?

>>38196968
>i love your work, Nick. you singlehandedly contained all the faggots from /r9k/

Only one remained out of my reach but you're here now.

>>38197005
you know, black text is not as effective when the covered text is completely predictable

>>38196972
Well discord SDnF8z7
I guess we could use this.

>>38197045

Don't blame me if your grand faggotry can be detected long before you actually arrive.

As to black not being effective, your mom advised me.

>>38197086

What am I supposed to do with this? I fear I'll get spammed like a mother if I go with this. We'll wait till next time and organise something then, more privately.

>>38197108
Cool with me I dont use discord much so setting up a basic server is really all I could bother to do right now.

>>38197089
terrible delivery. anyways keep doing you. i love faggots all flocking to this thread. you objectively make /r9k/ better. love you, you beautiful retard

>>38196461
Your examples are unusual. Your anecdotal evidence where it doesn't fit the pattern is the exception not the rule. You're right that it does depend upon the type of woman, but I can tell you that the daddy issues ones - which is a great proportion - are easy to prey upon.

>>38197160
you talk as if you get any. you're not fooling anyone you rping idiot

>>38197153

>I have never learned to punctuate
>the post

Too bad you stopped jousting. Judging my delivery is one thing, but having an actual comeback is a whole other story.

If you're not willing to explain why you're so upset, and not willing to joust, then you should just leave and do something fun.

I'm not sure if therapy can help with this issue. I've been stuck in a rut for over a decade. I try and improve myself to become more functional, but it seems like self improvement is just part of a cycle that ensures I never get anywhere. I don't know if I'm simply not making enough of an effort, or if there's an underlying problem that needs to be addressed with a different strategy. I want to become the kind of person that's actually capable of accomplishing things.

>>38197160
>Your anecdotal evidence where it doesn't fit the pattern is the exception not the rule.

That's not how anecdotal evidence works, in case you're thinking of extending this to the fallacy, which most people here don't know how to use.

My "anecdotal evidence", compared to what, your stats?

Daddy issues have nothing to do with physiques or any of the stuff you listed, which was precisely my point.

>>38197195
>you talk as if you get any. you're not fooling anyone you rping idiot

Facet rapes your kind for breakfast. I'd be wary if I were you.

>>38197202

What kind of improvement did you try and how did it fail?

>>38196992
>How about some realistic ways to improve your life
I guess lifting and excercising, which I'm already doing. Getting some routines and putting in effort, but in the end all it does is highlight why I'm stuck in escapism in the first place. Hell, the more I live like a person, the more exciting and in-depth my escapism becomes. The more I go into society, the more I try to escape from it.
>What do you want?
To fulfill my unrealistic and impossible power fantasies that might as well be ripped out of comic books. To be free and unbound by anything.
>Do you want a woman?
Yes, to some extent. But here again It's more about the fantasy and my own personal image of an ideal woman I'm not sure exists, at least in notable amounts.
I would not want an actual, ordinary relationship, at least with any normal person, since it'd just be a miserable deal with no chance of success, unless I put in great efforts in acting. I don't actually think I'm capable of relationships like that.
>A great job?
Not really. Money is just means to an end and I don't so much want a job as a cause, something to live and exist for.
>Fun activities?
Already have those. Drinking, masturbation, video games, music, books, going innawoods and all the other things that distract me from reality.
>What do you live for?
Nothing. I just live. It's not uncommon for me to think that I could just die right there when I'm laying in bed at the end of the day and it'd be just fine - save maybe for my parents who'd grieve.

>>38197225
Women who've been treated badly seek out masculine daddy figures to do it again. What's the mystery here? Not to mention, people in general are dazzled by beauty. Would you like me to find statistics to prove that women prefer more conventionally attractive people?

>>38197199
only kids judge punctuation when the sentences are completely understandable (as you evidence with your response). it's a cheap shot used when you lack imagination and have no other attack. as for being upset, i just thanked you for your work. i mean it when i say im glad you keep all the faggots in one thread

>>38196992
>>38197266
Now, after putting my thoughts into order, I guess what I REALLY would like is to live a satisfying, fulfilling life. Just couldn't put it into words in the previous post.

>>38197234
lol the only thing facet rapes is his own hand

>>38197312
Why do you even come to this thread? You can be a faggot attention whore somewhere else, and get more attention than here.

>>38197266
>To fulfill my unrealistic and impossible power fantasies that might as well be ripped out of comic books.

Speak with Facet about this.

I'm about to fall asleep. I wish I had more time with you. Keep coming!

>>38197387
i came here to thank Nick for making a containment thread. also this thread is full of attention whores so why do you care?

>>38197276
>Women who've been treated badly seek out masculine daddy figures to do it again.

Some, not all. The people you associate with aren't the average, and clearly aren't healthy.

You can find stats for just about anything. When terms aren't defined, it means nothing.

Everything I see around me is no exception to your imagined rules. It's just how normal people function.

>>38197401
>Speak with Facet about this.
I'll take it he's got fantasies of his own?
>Keep coming!
Keep what exactly coming? I'm confused.

>>38197282

And yet you keep writing like a ten-year-old. Kids don't judge punctuation because they generally don't care, they're kids. If you mean to converse with me, you're going to have to level up, boyo.

>>38197247
Exercising, eating healthy, limiting computer use, socializing more, practicing a hobby, reading, keeping a journal. Not all at the same time mind you.

I always read that in order to improve you have to treat yourself better and build good habits, which in turn leads to increased energy and happiness that you use to improve yourself again, so that your self improvement compounds itself. But in my experience it isn't really true. You do something for a month and eventually it becomes frustrating and tiresome, and reminding yourself why you're doing it doesn't seem important.

>>38197419
>i came here to thank Nick for making a containment thread.

Bad faith. You're not fooling anyone, silly poophead.

Beause of your lack of punctuation, you're as easily recognisable as if you used a trip.

>>38197457

You, you keep coming to the thread. I must go soon.

In fact, right now.

Nighty!

>>38197499
>You, you keep coming to the thread.
Ok. Hopefully I'll figure things out by airing my thoughts.
>Nighty!
Good night.

>>38197499
>silly poophead
what are you, 5?

i know im recognizable i just said i was the one thanking you for your service. are you so dense you think that was me hiding?

>>38197457
I looked over this post:
>>38197266
I advise you to get a Fetlife account for a start. You might be pleasantly surprised about the options available to you, and the things that people are willing to entertain. Chances are there's a woman out there who'd love to pretend to be a wounded gazelle and you, the rampaging bioweapon or whatever

>>38197590
How interesting. Tell me more.

>>38197568
Dude it's not the first time you come here, if you hate this threads and nick so much, why do you keep coming here after fullfilling your objective of "thanking" nick?

>>38197624
Fetlife is a website for fetishists. It facilitates networking, hookups, relationships and more unique scenarios. You'd do well to browse the forum, make a profile, take it all in. Honestly, there's likely a pervert out there that will match up with you perfectly.

>>38197689
If this >>38197590 is your post, then pardon, I didn't realise you were being serious with it. My fantasies, least the ones I spoke of aren't sexual in nature, so none of that applies.
With the personal ideal of a woman I spoke of, I meant someone who'd be independent, asocial and would leave me miles of space, but still would be willing to be in a relationship with me. Not really something I'd expect to find.

>>38192581.
Hey, Nick. I'm a seriously mentally fucked up guy. I have been experiencing a lot of anxiety and just overall low self-worth for the past year and a bit. And when I say low self-worth, I really mean it. When I go to pay for my groceries or what not I always kinda drop the money on the cashier's hand, so I don't touch them since I think I'm too disgusting of a creature and not worthy of touching other people since they'll won't like me. At work, I struggle with keeping eye contact with co-workers and clients. I and talking to people since I believe that I am only just ruining their day with my face and existence. It's really serious, and it has only gotten worse. I guess due to me being 18 it's not as bad as being 30 and being like this, but I can't see things getting any better. I really want to get the motivation I had back when I was younger. The way I would always be happy to wake up and be ok with talking to people. In fact, I was known as a confident guy but due to recent events my self-esteem as been smashed to the ground and then some.

Have you ever dealt with someone like me? Is there any hope? If so I really can't see it.

Can'r commit suicide because I'm a christfag and believe in hell. Also, there's a part of me that still believes there's hope, but that mainly comes from me being 18 and still thinking I have time to recover.

>>38197884
Ah, fair enough. When I hear power fantasies I assume sexual. If you'll elaborate I might be able to advise something nearer the mark, potentially. Unfortunately though, if it's superpowers you've after you'd be better of visiting /x/ or taking a lot of drugs then visiting /x/

>>38197978
There is certainly hope. I'm afraid that Nick isn't here anymore, but I'd be happy to talk to you. I've known quite a few people with struggles like yours. Can you think of any event that might have triggered this shift?

>>38198029
>Can you think of any event that might have triggered this shift?
It wasn't a single event but rather a slow and gradual thing that got worse and worse.

>>38197983
>If you'll elaborate I might be able to advise something nearer the mark
My imagination and whatever escapist methods I scrounge up are enough, but thanks.
>if it's superpowers you've after you'd be better of visiting /x/ or taking a lot of drugs then visiting /x/
But those won't free me from society and its demands. I'd want to be completely independent, but realistically that would mean going into the woods to starve and I might as well just kill myself instead.

>>38198082
You can just buy a rifle and a bunch of survival gear and try to survive in the forest.

>>38198051
It's actually a lot more common than you might think around that age actually. You're not alone, anyway. It would be useful to be able to communicate with you more easily. As such would you adopt a name just for these threads? None of us use them outside of here, but it enables ongoing discussion.

>>38198082
In that case, you have to think carefully about what you truly want. I suggest that you try this documentary if you've the time:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NrBHr2PtEI
It centres on a man who builds up the necessary money, resources and establishes a plan to do just that: to live independently in the forest. It may give you some ideas.

Or as
>>38198140
might be hinting, you can join a survivalist community if you're an American.

>>38198180
I'm the low self-worth guy.

I doubt it's at this level though. Imagine having a friend who is trying to talk to you, trying to get your attention but you're just too beta and are bad at maintaining eye contact.

I also, think it's my vibe. In my last job my boss, as soon as he saw me, knew I had no friends. He just saw the utter self-loathing I had in my eyes, and I could see the pity in his eyes. He felt sorry for me. In my new job, even my current boss knows it. I just secrete this vibe that tells people I don't have friends and there's nothing I can do about it.

>>38198337
Here, no one can smell you nor see you. Here you won't be judged for those things. People want to hear what you have to say, and you can come back every day. Welcome, pete.

>>38198140
Yep and I've given it some consideration. Might at least give it a go before I kill myself in the future.

>>38198180
>In that case, you have to think carefully about what you truly want.
That's one of my issues. I have no idea what I truly want from life. Living an ordinary existence as a part of society just doesn't appeal to me, but neither does going off on my own enough to actually do it. I'm just passive and apathetic to everything that's not in my mind.
>you can join a survivalist community if you're an American.
Don't want a community though, at least anything tight-knit, like a survivalist group.

>>38198379
>Welcome, pete.
t-thank you. To try and cope I write out this quote and get people mainly women to make vocaroos of themselves saying it. I have a collection and whenever I'm feeling down I just listen to it.

>>38198457
You do you. Tell us about your life. And remember, however bad you think you are that's not how you're likely to be perceived.

>>38198493
I don't wanna get too into it but there were times when I was in the deepest pits of depression, and I actually wished I was a starving child in Africa besides going through what I was going through then.

That even is what sparked it and since then I have been permanently damaged!

>>38198554
There's no rush. Just share what you feel comfortable with. Lurk as much as you like too. It sounds as though it was very important to you though, and unpicking how and why it affected you might be the key to getting you back to your old self.

>>38192581
I have an existential crisis. I don't know why I'm still alive, which the sense of living, which is the goal of my life and why. I can't achive any banal pleasure that society endorses as a carpe diem because of my mental disorder, but I don't know I should keep trying to reach some of them.

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155KB, 959x540px

I'm afraid I need to sleep now. See you all tomorrow. It's good to see more people joining in.

>>38198597
The depression and the low self-worth are independent of each other. When I was at the height of my depression, I still had confidence. But I guess the low self-worth came from being lonely. To best illustrate my point I'll just link you to a Reddit post I made a while back.

https://www.reddit.com/r/ForeverAlone/comments/5zhgou/it_turns_out_i_dont_have_depression/?utm_content=title&utm_medium=user&utm_source=reddit&utm_name=frontpage

You don't have to read it.

>>38198723
I will definitely read it tomorrow, and will respond in the next thread.

>>38198798
sure thing mi amigo.

>>38198606
What do you want out of life? You don't want money, sucess, a women or power?

>>38198723
Actually you probably have depression which is caused by your loneliless. I went through something really similar to you i met a girl and we were together for a while, i felt really happy then everything ended, and just went back to the hole wanting to neck myself.

>>38198930
I swear. If I ever got a gf I think I would cry.

>tfw you will "never" have a gf

Why live?