Robot revenge

>>38095008
What has he fucking done to you to make you this mad??

>>38095008
what is his personality type? does he prefer a nice and tidy environment and is averse to change? if so, you can easily ruin his sense of stability and security by moving things from their usual locations. keep moving the toaster, coffee pot, etc. under the pretense of cleaning and forget it move it back to the old spot. he's probably too beta to confront you but he'll be in a state of great anguish and internal turmoil.

Pour a few drops of antifreeze in his drinks. Only do like 4-5 at a time, and if he doesn't respond to it (you'll know when he does) just keep adding more over time.

>>38095058
He stinks of b.o, piss/shit (wears adult diapers as a fetish), and cigarettes constantly.

He never cleans up after himself. That includes dishes, cig butts in the front lawn, flushing the toilet, partially eaten food in the fridge, used condoms in the trash, rotten fruits/vegetables he buys but never eats, and pet waste.

He has a dog and does not take care of it. He never fills the food or water bowl. Doesnt interact or walk the dog. And doesnt clean up his shit unless I bitch at him. Frankly the dog would be dead if I didnt take care of it myself. As an animal lover this pisses me off most of all.

He lives to consume. He does not produce anything of value, does not leave the house on his time off, he just sits on the couch, surfs the internet, watches anime, and vapes.

>>38095143
Absolute slob. I have moved and thrown away his stuff of his on purpose due to spite or general filthiness of his nesting areas. It does not faze him.

You are correct about him being an absolute beta. He cowers in my presence and at worst passively aggressively complains out loud when there is an issue. I am not a cruel person to anyone else but him.

>>38095321
>I hate my robot roommates
I see... sounds awful

How come you haven't moved out to some place a little cheaper and nicer?

>>38095398
> typo. there is just one robot

Because the location is near perfect and affordable and the the other roomates are great. He is the only issue. Moving would be admitting defeat.

>>38095431
>Moving would be admitting defeat.

This mentality is retarded anon..
Let it go, this isn't a game.

>>38095487
You are correct this is not a game.

This is my home of several years and I have a pretty great deal here (minus him). Housing in this area is highly competitive and I have fair rent.

>take photos of kids
>print them out at a library
>''mail'' them to your house
>don't address it to him so you can ''open it''
>make it obvious that inside the package of photos its addressed to him
>call cops
>explain
>get him arrested

or
>take lid off yogurt and leave in his room
>leave cheese to rot in his room
>jerk off into his shampoo and toiletries
>laxative his food
>buy a fuck load of crickets or live pet food and throw it in his room
>smear shit all over the bathroom and toilet
>buy a loud annoying talking bird

Why don't you just call the landlord and get him evicted

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>>38095624
>having roommates

i never understood how normies could do this. if there is just one family member in the kitchen i stay in my room until they are gone how could you live in close quarters with a stranger?

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>>38095657
The landlord is a great guy and is too nice to kick him out immediately. However, he is tired of robots shits and has told him to "start looking for a new place". Problem is that was months ago and robot is not really looking.


This is a picture of the cig butts he leaves in the front yard.

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>>38095638
Frankly, his room is already bad enough that rotten cheese would not make a difference. I do like the ideas of fucking with his shampoo. He has several herbal scrubs. Not like it makes a difference on the stink.
Attached is the toilet after he has destroyed it. So smearing shit would have no effect on him.

>>38095769
nigger that shit looks liek you never clean it regardless you dumb fuck

>>38095769
is he scared of bugs?
just crickets from a pet store like >>38095638 suggested
these faggots are hell to deal with and bugs can be very annoying for slobs even
big moths/beetles are hard to deal with too

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Rub his toothbrush on your asshole. He won't know but you will get a kick out of it and when the time is right, you can mention it

Post his contact info on /b/ or /pol/ and some of those dweebs will call him

>>38095769
get ants that bite and put them in his bed

>>38095829

Yeah--and then they'll be all over the whole place.

> I DON'T THINK SO

Get a huge wad of gum (used)

Leave outside until it is covered with ants

Put inside his bed or in a pair of his underwear

>>38095008
put moths in his clothes drawers and tear up his clothes and blame it on the moths

>>38095797
The bathroom will get to the point that either I or another roomate will clean it, but never him. I just despise cleaning up the robots feces so I put it off until I cant stand it anymore. (It was cleaned shortly after this picture was taken)

The rest of the house I keep under control except for his nesting area in the living room.

>>38095008
get blood (or something that looks like blood) and put it on his used underwear to make him think he has a medical problem

mutilate a few cats and leave the bodys in his room

>>38095798
Is there a risk on the insects migrating to my room? His room is adjacent to mine.

>>38095839
doubt this will happen if u only release a native species without a queen/princess
they will die in a couple of days

>>38095909
yes but I doubt they will go far
when crickets got out of my container I only really found them in the room they were released in, only once in any other room
just make sure u try to keep the door closed

>>38095909
just put that insect kill powder shit by your door

>>38095812
he doesnt brush his teeth nor does he own a toothbrush. He uses mouthwash instead.

>>38095892
Haha what wait don't tell me his room is like half the living room separated by a divider or some shit?

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Here is an image of the area in front of his bedroom door. That is his pets shit. Rather than clean it he covered it with a potty pad.

Ive cleaned up the dogs other messes where I have a chance of coming in contact with it.

>>38095968
just fuck with his mouthwash man
empty it out and replace it with minty water so he cant tell the difference without getting any of the pros of mouthwash
if u fuck with it too much he will tell its u

>>38095994
DUDE please if you can take a pic of his room and post it here.

>>38095996

Just pee a little bit in it every now and then

> stick the neck of the bottle in your asshole, same effect as above

>>38096005

Never mind that, post a pic of HIM

>>38095008
Kill his dog and put its decapitated head in his bed while he's sleeping.

>>38095968
laxatives or stuff that makes you constipated
>make him constipated for 1 month
>then start feeding him laxatives
thatll make him shit blood and be in agonising pain.

or this>>38096034

>>38095992
No he has a bedroom. The living room is supposedly communal. He camps out on the couch in front of the television where he stores his vaping materials. He is always in the same spot unless he is working or sleeping. Guests have commented on how they have spotted him on the couch, left for the day, and returned to find him in the same place.

>>38095894
I dont think I could touch his underwear without retching.

>>38095994
I can't understand how anyone could tolerate this. Take the poopoo and smear it on his door.

kill him OP, nobody will ever need to know :)

>>38096005
He is home now so that is too risky. I might do that later and I can get a picture of his nesting area.

>>38096051
is he mentally stable? as in, would stress or pressure be likely to cause him to burn the bitch down or something?

if you say he's already cowed by you, why don't you just throw down a real good ultimatum that he get his shit together and if he doesn't, you're gonna make his life holy hell

then you consult the thread for options on how to do that, maybe talk to the landlord and bring up that its a literal health hazard, having dog shit around all the time, that the dude isn't doing anything. mention explicitly that interior damage to carpets/walls/etc is gonna happen- if he wants to rent that place out to other folk he's gonna have to spend some nickels if it keeps up like this

fuck sake dude i'm not even much of an animal-sympathizer or w/e you'd say, but keeping a dog indoors in those conditions is fucking abysmal and disgraceful

been in some shit houses before too, so I know that god-awful smell that builds up and WONT FUCKING LEAVE if some dumb lazy trash cunt continuously allows his dog to shit everywhere

>>38096103
He smokes cigs outside, yes? Just wait for him to do that.

Is the doggo cool at least? If you want a subtle way to fuck with him, you could become the doggo's new master and make his jealous.

>>38096034
I like his dog. He has tried to pawn the poor animal onto me but I dont want to pay for its food. So I take care of the important duties and force him to buy its supplies.

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>>38096076
That is his door. He literally covers it with a potty pad to avoid cleaning up the shit.

>>38096155
Wait, so that's the outside of his room? Is the inside literally littered with feces everywhere?

>>38095008
You're not going to win in a passive aggressive pig sty war with someone who clearly gives no shit about cleanliness. It's like trying to play loud music as a revenge against loud neighbors. You'll drive yourself insane long before he even begins to notice anything you're doing simply because his tolerance level for this (literal) shit is so much higher than yours.

Your best bet is to put pressure on the landlord. That means social pressure from as many other people as possible. That means legal pressure if you can find any local codes/ordinances/association bylaws/etc that go in your favor. Hound that guy day and night.

Make your problem with this roommate into the landlord's problem.

>>38096155
fucking seeing this makes me mention again, in your next conversation with the landlord you've gotta bring up the inevitable (and likely already done) property damage that this cunt is causing to the interior of the home. don't bring up how the guy is an asshole or how he's nasty or how nobody likes him. focus the conversation right on the dude's shekels or his time cleaning that fuckshit up for new tenants eventually

>>38096111
He claims to have stress, bad back, poor knees, all the usual robot shit. But I dont think he would turn violent. He tried to stand up to me once when I called him out on the dog issue but I ended that quickly.

As I said earlier the landlord has told him to start looking for a new place but the landlord is too kindhearted to kick him out. I even offered to to do it myself but he refused.

>>38096127
The dog already sees me as the primary human in his life. I feed it, clean its water, play with it and keep it company. Robot hardly has any interaction unless I force him. Which really sucks for me. I recently lost my own dog and I really dont want another at this time.

>>38095321
>used condoms
he gets fucking laid?
he does sound like a waste of space, can report him for animal abuse if he neglects the dog, the antifreeze doesn't sound like an overkill too

>>38096171
Yes, the outside of his room and is door is literally covered in shit.

>>38096173
Ive been using the guest card for a long time. Any friend that I have visit I convince to comment on the state of the house within earshot of landlord. The other roomates have also expressed their disgust in him, but less aggressively than I. They tend to talk behind his back where I will call him out directly in front of the landlord.

Absolutely despicable. Kind of curious how the room looks like. The pictures you took made me want to vomit a little.

>>38096216
He attracts F- fuckbois that are into "heavy men". They dont stay for very long when they realize how much of a slob he is and how he does nothing all day.

>>38096313
Shit he's a faggot to boot?

>>38096313
I see, he def souded like a fat fuck
How old is he? maybe he will die/get seriously sick soon enough

>>38096270
This is not enough pressure. You need to be more forceful. These are not just some minor complaints that should be able to be easily brushed off. Use a variety of different arguments (legal, contract language, financial damage, displeasure of tenants, responsibility as a landlord, etc).

Calls, letters with a long list of signatures, in person meetings with other people by your side. You need to be absolutely unrelenting

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>>38096338
Here an anal stretching device he left in the shower.

>>38096402
Explains all the poop lying around

>>38096357
Mid twenties, maybe 325+ lbs, heavy smoker, terrible mountain dew diet. He always groaning and coughing and hacking. Often complains about his bad back and limps around for sympathy.

I overheard a conversation he had with a roomate in which he got test results from the doctor. He has high amount of fat in some vital organ, lungs or something, I forget. He tried to claim the doctor was bullshitting him but the roomate called him out and said its the 4+ bottles of mountain dew he drinks a day. I think its his diet of Uncle Bens and tuna helper. That shit stinks up the house.

When he first moved him he lied and said he was a chef who went to a prestigious cooking school. He got a job at a catering company but was let go for being too slow. His cooking skills is limited to boxed and canned processed foods. Ive never seen him prepare a vegetable.

>>38096402
what the fuck?
can u mess with his sex toys?

>>38096513
That would risk exposure to whatever diseases he has.

>>38096034
That might be a little too godfather

>>38095008
talk to a landlord and tenant lawyer for help, your situation is completely fucked

just start taking his shit and literally throwing it out. everything you can get a hold of. if he complains, just say that it's all trash anyway since he never cleans anything and you can't tell.

what's he going to do about it? fight you?

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He owns two motor scooters, purchased on credit, which he uses an ashtray instead of driving.

He has so many nice things, all purchased on credit. And they are all in terrible shape. PS2, PS3, XBOX360, VIVE VR, 3DS, and an alienware laptop. All covered in dust and mountain dew syrup. He has no sense of money and I wait for the day in which debtcollectors come knocking.

normies are always giving robots problems just stop being a bitch and let him live.

>>38096612
Ive done this to minor things, food, shits he leaves on the kitchen counter, mail he leaves in the junk pile for months. I am willing to ramp it up. Any suggestions?

>>38096714
you sound like this autist a friend of mine was roomed up with, he tried to wage a crusade against my friend over toothpaste on the sink and shit like that

I think you're the actual robot

>>38096711
Robots are oblivious to how their actions effect others. His dog had a massive tumor on its tail and was about to burst open from the size. It wasn't until I forced him to visit the vet that he did something about it. Almost losing the dog to cancer did not change his disposition towards the animal he is still cold and uncaring.

>>38096714
just be increasingly confrontational and directly, unmistakably hostile. make him actually afraid of being around you. i get the sense that you're kind of the actual robot here; you're not putting any real effort and investment into this.

you're just doing some light complaining while hoping the problem will solve itself.

>>38096747
that's a rough one, being around people that are cruel to animals while you aren't.

>>38096732
I'm more of a cyborg than a robot.

But something must be wrong with you if you think literal shit smeared on his bedroom door is
tolerable.
>>38095994

>>38095321
how the fuck does he pay rent?

>>38096785
no there's something wrong with your roommate.

get out if you can

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Lmao at everyone believing that it's his "room mate". It's your room, your anal stretching device, your life. Admit it OP.

>>38095321
I can't really help you with your problem because I'm retarded when it comes to stuff like this but I just want to thank you for taking care of that dog instead of punishing it like other anons would do

>>38096402
>fags aren't mentally il-

>>38095008
Kill him
(Bonus points: Kill yourself too)

>>38096402
spray something that would sting on his anal stretcher

you wont have to touch it if you spray it

>>38096792
Wage slave. He works so I will give him that.

op if you're serious, just move

i live with 2 other dudes and honestly if they were that bad id probably move?

i dont know... for me the most important thing is silence and being quiet. i live with a 500 lbs guy who smells i bet even worse than your flatmate, but he's quiet so i dont mind

if you can afford to, just move and find another place

probably you should focus on things in life that will allow you to not need to live with others, but in the meanwhile just find another roommate

make calls and see whats available

>>38096690
Wtf how has he not died yet from the smokes obesity and faggotry

If he really does wear diapers, you can go for the old itching powder trick