Thank you for being part of my midlife crisis, anons

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>Be me
>Be a dorky normie office worker with dockers and button-down shirt working in a big glass building in a cubicle for over 30 years.
>Hit mid-50s.
>Realize I've just been waiting to die for the last threeo decades and that my life is not only meaningless (which I knew), it is painful and will never get better.
>Realize that even having this kind of realization is pretty meaningless, and kind of cliched after Breaking Bad and American Beauty.
>Decide not to give a fuck.
>Quit job for no reason
>Buy a shitload of weed and pills
>Sit around the house all day high and surfing the infratubes in my underwear. Discover monoglian frogfeels imageboards and dank memes.
>Act like a faggot tryhard because all this dank memery is new to me and I'm just slinging it around like a tard. Get called out on being an asshole and a noob all the time. Not a single fuck is given.
>Discover camwhores, start jacking off compulsively and letting the old-man cum spatter all over the coffee table and walls.
>Stop going outside, ever, or taking showers. >Start Operation Piss-jug
>A month or so goes by, wife is crying and screaming by now, "I just don't know what is wrong with you anon, what happened, I did everything I could, you need some help, let me call doctor Nosenstein the psychiatrist."
>Burp in her face, fart into the sofa, tell her to fuck off roastie I'm doing science.
>"I'll divorce you anon"
>Reply "do it faggit."
>Six months more go by, house is falling apart, money is almost gone, rancid pizza boxes and frozen food wrappers everywhere, whole house covered in cumstains, lice or something in hair.
>Feels good man