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Anonymous
Autistic stories thread 2017-06-29 12:09:03 Post No. 38035746
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Autistic stories thread 2017-06-29 12:09:03 Post No. 38035746
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>be me
>cutting potatoes
>roommate is watching Masterchef
>cuts to a guy cutting potatoes
>he does this weird "stab after he's done"
>think 'wtf is he doing'
>try it myself
>stabbing potatoes instead of cutting them
>get bored, cut all potatoes
>start stabbing chopping board
>"what are you doing"
>roommate has been watching me prison shank cutting bored for past 5 seconds
>>
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Later that night
>be me
>be walking to shops
>hoodie on
>shadowboxing up the street
>remember potato cut man
>start practicing potato stab
>look up
>young woman with groceries approaching me
>car across the road in parking lot with lights on
>see look of pure horror in her eyes
>>
>>38035746
Show him your dick. Ask him what he's doing but say it like a faggot. It's your only way out of this autism.
>>
>>38035768
My roommate is a girl
>>
>>38035780
it's ok, just follow >>38035768 advice and you'll become so autistic, it'll reset itself and you'll become Chad. Thank me later
>>
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>>38035746
>be me
>fresh from a trip to the Wally World
>take my groceries out of the car
>start to walk toward my apartment
>guy is biking toward me on the sidewalk
>engage autismo.exe
>stop in the middle of the parking lot and stare directly at his face
>"Walmart... Walmart" I say in a robotic voice while holding up my groceries for him to see
At least he smiled
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