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Anonymous
I fucked up big, guys... 2017-06-27 10:44:03 Post No. 37992190
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I fucked up big, guys... 2017-06-27 10:44:03 Post No. 37992190
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>be me
>go out to nice breakfast place with friends who I haven't seen in a while
>we arrive at the restaurant and an 8/10 qt redhead greets us
>her and I make eye contact and I know that it's about to be an interesting day
>she keeps glancing at me and smiling
>I'm not that ugly and I had really freshened myself up for this
>I think she's into me
>our food arrives and we start eating
>friend asks a nearby waitress ( I don't know if you'd still call them waitresses or if that's only for fancy restaurants) if he could get some more butter for his pancakes
>she thought he said water and comes back with a pitcher
>friend tells her that he asked for water, not butter and we all start laugh
>redhead qt who had passed by our table jokingly says "would you like some water in your butter?"
>everyone laughs
>decide to try and impress her with a joke
>sperg out and say "I'LL STICK MY BUTTER INTO YOUR WATER!!!"
>doesn't even make sense
>everyone is silent and stays silent for the rest of our time their
>redhead comes over a couple of times but doesn't even face my general direction
>we finish and all pay for the bill
>I go back home and start calling myself a fucking idiot
>it's been a couple days now and none of my friends have contacted me
>I messaged all of them trying to play it off saying "Hey remember that awkward breakfast we all had and I said that stupid joke? Good think I wasn't being serious lol."
Why can't I just have ONE fucking normal breakfast with some friends? Why do I always have to screw everything up? Am I just cursed to have shitty social interactions?
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Things always have a 50/50 chance of going to shit after you say something.
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Forgot to mention that the redhead was also a waitress
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>>37992210
The chances have always felt more 70/30 for me.
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>>37992190
With time, you'll learn that if you are autistic, you MUST be serious 100% of the time. A joke isn't just material, but it's execution and timing too. If you aren't even good at socializing to begin with, don't even crack jokes. Your autism will make you seem serious, and I'm sure your position as the omega ride-along friend has already been established, so nothing you say or do will be funny to them. The fact you challenged this is grounds for termination of you from the group.
My recommendation:
Find new friends.
These guys didn't contact you after one awkward fuck-up? They weren't your friends. To hell with them.
I speak from personal experience. I did pranks and banter with my old friends, and I came across as a rude dick, so I have no friends now. Fuck them if they didn't like having an actual egg I brought from home thrown at them in class.
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>>37992190
Everyone in this story sounds autistic
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>>37992395
Everyone's a little autistic in their own way.
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>>37992390
>Fuck them if they didn't like having an actual egg I brought from home thrown at them in class.
This isn't even funny though. At least I can see what OP was going for. This is just being a cunt for no reason. I'd have decked you if you hit me with an egg
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>>37992498
>>37992395
>Autistic person hanging out with other autists
Who would have thought
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