Misunderstandings Thread

File: C0x93KEWEAAyRQF.jpg (62KB, 750x726px) Image search: [Google]

62KB, 750x726px

Any fellow robots ever get themselves in trouble by misremembering popular normie expressions?
>be autist
>somehow score qt3.14 gf who finds my social retardation adorable
>has her own job and apartment
>she is aggressive and dominant in bed
>i would prefer if she was more submissive but since she actually touches my benis i ain't complaining
>figure this is it, this is probably the best girl i'm ever likely to get, if not the only
>think about marrying her before she comes to her senses
>try to bring up marriage in a casual way, mention i'm up for taking the knot if she's into it
>she practically explodes with glee
>says she never thought i would be up for something like that
>i guess i don't seem like the monogamous type to her
>this is it bros, finally getting that pussy locked down
>she has to go to work so i don't get to talk to her about it any more
>get good and drunk on a couple of bottles of wine i find in her fridge
>that night she ties me up for our usual bedroom games
>"are you ready to take the knot now, anon?"
>confused as fuck, i still haven't even gotten down on one knee to give her the box with the engagment ring yet
>"but you haven't even opened my ring yet!"
>she looks confused for a second and then smiles
>"don't worry, i'll make sure to loosen you up first!"
>the fuck? i'm already drunk, how much more loosened up can i get?
>try to protest, slur my words
>she shoves a gag in my mouth
>gives a shrill whistle and calls out "BISHOP!"
>suddenly remember bishop is the name of her doberman
>something has gone horribly wrong

Apparently the expression is actually supposed to be "tying the knot".