I'm actually smarter than all of you.

*BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPFFFFFTTTTT!*

oh excuse me,teehee, what were you going on about?

Why should anyone bother indulging your egotistical bullshit?

Be that as it may, this isn't reddit, genius.

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>>37796831

>Smart
>As an empirical and single-standard measurement
>"Try match me"

Nigga you lost again?
>>>/lit/

What's the minimum poise required to avoid getting staggered by a greatsword wielded in 2 hands?

>>37796831
What's your iq? Are you smart but lazy?

>it's another "smart but lazy" guy who's bragging about how smart he is to make himself feel better

>>37796831
>smart
>photo of a Chinese cartoon
Congratulations, friend. You've earned my (You).

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>>37796858
>>37796863
>>37796883
>>37796951
>>37796985
>>37796960


not a very good first showing. And by the way, I embody the spirit of fourchan itself. As if it's as simple as defining people by the website they browse not the person they are.

>>37797002
what makes you say you're smart? not berating you, genuinely curious

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>>37796984
>>37796981
>>37796965
Don't know my IQ, yeah, I am lazy. I have no idea what the minimum poise is. Surely you can do better than that.

>>37796831
Ok i'll take the bait. What's the meaning of life?

>>37797046
Well, it's 56.
Fucking loser, get the fuck out.

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>>37797017
There's riddles I have solved that no one else in the world has solved, to my knowledge. I'd always be happy to meet someone who has solved it, but perhaps the integrity of that challenge is tainted because I have given away the answer before, so how could I even know if someone really solved it, or just read the answer I gave and repeated it back to me?

>>37796831
If mankind came from dirt, why is there still dirt?

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>>37797078
my poise or my iq? what does 56 mean?
>>37797057
That is a very good question, I'd have to think about it. I don't have the general answer, but I know what the meaning of mine is. For me, it's just to live. I've seen too much and lived life on fast forward so I might not last, but I'll try. All that's left for me to do is get ready for the end of the world if I'm lucky to see it happen. Bunker, canned food, portraits of asuka, the whole nine yards. That's what I'm working towards in my life. I also collect anime mug mugs.

>>37797080
you seem like a genuinely interesting character. do you have contact information? i'd love to chat with you

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>>37797080
This has to be the stupidest thing I've ever read. Post the riddle and we'd be happy to prove you wrong.

>>37797080
What riddles?
Oregana

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>>37797139
>>37797140
Very well. Let's see what you can do.

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>>37796831

What have you accomplished?
I worked on the first atomic bomb.

Also,
>>37796794

>match me
at what?

>>37797174
tfw ignored originally

>>37797174
Op if you can solve this I will acknowledge your omnipotent intelligence

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>>37797116
uh, I don't know if I am comfortable speaking with my real voice. But I am here now. what do you want to talk about

>>37797174
>>37797200
Thats not even a riddle?

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>>37797174
>>37797225
Dammit I forgot the picture. Anyway solve this please

>>37797110
>the meaning of life is to live
Ok, explained in very simple terms but valid answer
>i also like collecting anime mug mugs
You know this is the type of question i use to weed out the brainlets. 2/10 made me respond

>>37797243
Fill in the three on "30" to make it "00"
Ez

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>>37797243
See, that's just the problem. I've seen this answered before. So, I wouldn't really be solving it. That's why I write all my own riddles. And I like riddles, so you won't catch me by just copy and pasting an old one. I know all the answers already.

>>37797243
2D>3D
fuck you

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>>37797243

Did it in 1 homie. That was obv.

>>37797238
oh but it is. why do you say it isn't? It's a pure riddle too, pure logic, no wordplay. The best kind.

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>>37797269
that's not a mistake I really do have mug mugs

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>>37797286
No
>>37797293
Nice excuse
>>37797308
Correct
>>37797312
No you imbecile you have to use 4, not just one

>>37797319
No.
Its not strict enough with what the answer could possibly be. The answer could be 8 thousand different fucking things and its all dependent on what the creator decides is the TRU answer. Real riddles has one answer that can possibly make sense.

>>37797345
Excellent D's my man

>>37796831
Doesn't matter; I'm stronger. Let's see how those brains help when I kick your ass you fucking nerd.

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>>37797345

Here you go, exactly four spaces filled.

>>37796562
ugh this is you faggot

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>>37797345
No excuse, I'm sorry being honest bothers you. Would you rather I read the answer off like an actor in a play, without actually having to think?
>>37797349
Typical answer of those who can't see the truth. You see, rather than think of ways it's possible, you think of ways it's impossible to preserve this notion in your mind you are smarter than the riddle. That you could just solve it if it was possible. Well, it is assuredly possible, I solved it myself. And I am not the creator, merely the transcriber. I solved it myself before I showed it to anyone else. All the parts fit together perfectly like a puzzle, once you work it out.

ayo nigguh
>*smacks lips*
wuss
>*licks teeth several times*
wuss yo uhpinion uh ho'oism muh nigga

>>37797446
You're actually fucking retarded aren't you?

>smart
>posts on /r9k/

tsk tsk tsk, not buying it anon.

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>>37797429
no
>>37797445
yes

origin story

>>37796831
>tfw I'm smarter than OP because I don't care about being smarter than OP

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>>37797445
I've decided I am mildly impressed by you. What did it, my manner of speech or my Asuka-ness? Or did I fall into the trap of you just throwing out random feelers and wanting me to confirm it like I did.
>>37797508
I've done that before. I started a thread on nihilism on /pol/ that got 300 replies and I did not care about defending nihilism.

>>37797470
no what makes you say that
>>37797467
just responding for original

How do you know that you're smart? In what specific ways does your intelligence give you an advantage?

>>37797110
>he doesn't know qhat 56 means

Thought you were smart

>>37797174
>Drunk girl gets into cap.
>"where you going kiddo" Mumbles destination.
>Arrives at destination.
>Asks for fee doesn't answer because wasted.
>Grabs purse, bitch has no money because she burnt it all on blow and booze.
>"kiddo look here we have a problem. You have no money and i want my fee".
>Girl agrees to pay for journey via a sexual act. Drive to a secluded area because regulations.
>Hauls the girl into the front seat.
>proceeds to undress (panties filled with piss because drunk). Kiss.
>SUDDENLY!!! THE SOUND OFF A CAR!! BLUE AND RED LIGHTS!!! IS THAT A COP CAR??? Oh shit it is.
>tries to drag girl into back seat. No time, quickly attempts to hide evidence to no avail.
>"well well well. What do we have here?"
>"ah nothing boyo just parking the cab waiting for a client, you know how it is".
>Cop smells bullshit, guy gets arrested.
>After girl wakes up she """doesn't remember anything""". Cabie gets charged with sexual misconduct i.e rape. Spends the next twenty years in a maximun security prison where he will get AIDS.
There i've solved your ""riddle"" am i a genius now

I would show you but I'm too fucken drunk rn

>>37797751
no evidence of bodily fluids on her, remember? Aside from her own urine of course, I should amend that.

>>37797751
>>37797907

>>37798118


woops, not you

>>37796831
You're browsing /r9k/ so how smart could you actually be?

>>37798133
Ok the mr genius give us the correct answer then

>>37797751
That's a good question. I didn't always consider myself smarter, but it just seems that day in and day out, people are screwing up basic logical problems. I don't know if there's any real tangible advantage.
>>37798171
enh probably not very, but so far no one has solved my riddle. The smartest fish in this pond at least.

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>>37798205
Afraid I can't. What good would it do you to keep getting handed everything? You'll never really put your mind to the task if you think you can just whine your way to victory. As well, it dilutes the integrity of the challenge, because if the answer becomes commonly known, then anyone could just pretend they solved it to feign being on my level.

Kind of sucks when I see people put in a genuine effort but they don't quite crack it, but someday someone will see the solution, I hope.

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>>37798301
Jesus christ tumblr art is fucking awful

You might be, I don't care.

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Alright I have to depart. Once more, the riddle goes without finding a man who can meet the challenge.

Maybe tomorrow.

>>37796831
You're a bitch ass motherfucker. suck my dick bitch

>>37796831

Anime is a low to mediocre IQ interest. You probably have a 110 IQ at most. I am a Mensa member and no Mensa member I've ever met has ever watched anime regularly.Certainly none have horded anime pictures on their computers. You probably don't even know what Mensa is, which is understandable because you would never be accepted so it really doesn't people like you.

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I'm certainly not as dumb as you because I don't address a large sample size with nothing but pretension and claim to be better at them for something that can't be empirically proven especially if you don't want to share your pattern recognition intelligence quotient.

>>37796831
Are you a Christian?
I know a little something or two about that so we can discuss that.

>>37798301
Nigga aren't you going red in the face at the complete ass your making out of yourself? You sound like a dumb person pretending to be smart, it's fucking embarrassing mate

>>37797327
timestamp?

oreganoli

>>37796831
>best this place can do
Best this place has to offer you mean

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>>37796831
>smart
>likes Asuka

>>37797408
The statement is already true cause it 8.0 not 80

>>37799785
Yes, but it didn't say by filling in 4 or less, it said by filling in 4

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how? do you want someone to submit a unified theory of physics or some shit
>qualifications
people can lie
>IQ
see above
>knowledge
people can copy and past from wikipedia

so if you are such an intellectual titan, demonstrate to us how one can prove one's intelligence on an anoniemoose image board?

>>37800376
Just put the 4th square in the middle of the rightmost part of the 3 doesn't make it not a 3 anymore just changes the font

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>>37797408
there it's a greater than or equal to sign

>>37800513
The intended answer from this meme test is actually to put them in the left side corners of the 0's to turn it into 2d>3d, but yeah, any combination of changes that make it so it is still recognizable as a number would work too

>>37800561
>>37797243
this was a reply to you

>>37800561
That's 5 pixels

>>37800620
no, it's 4 squares?

>>37800638
>>37800620
oh, i didn't nab the original image, i got one that someone modified

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>>37797243
doesn't seem legit, but idk

>>37796831
I know you are, but what am I? Match that, faggo

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>>37797243
there 28 > 3.0

>>37800718
fuck, thats what i thought

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>>37797658
>no
>what makes you say that
K E K

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>>37799652
Best i can do with kitty upon my lap

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>>37800511
solve my riddle
>>37799725
loves* Asuka, she's the greatest
>>37799716
sure why not

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let's see what you got OP

>>37796831
>worst girl
>smart
hmm

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Who can answer this? let's find out

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>>37801483
heh. It is obviously B! As a side note, I actually did this experiment in real life and I got B as the random choice and at first I thought no way but then I realized it was indeed jose.

I've been at a girl's place a few times now to 'le netflix and chill', but we literally only chilled.
In a few days I'll be a her place again.
What's her fucking endgame? I'm pretty sure she knows that I like her, but until now nothing happened.

>>37801528
You gotta move one of your horsies so the king is trapped.

>weebshit

Aaaaaand there goes your argument, all the way into that trashcan.

>>37801735
you gotta mention you want to bang her while at the same time making it seem like you don't care about banging her. It's all about the segways man.

>If I wasn't so into this show, I'd probably start railing you.

>>37801846
That doesn't even sound so bad, thank you!

>>37797446
okay, the cab driver raped the girl as retribution for her pissing in the front seat, he perfectly cleaned her and the car and then she licked his top lib before falling unconscious. there you go, an answer that could be true but obviously isn't the TRU answer

>>37801478
it's not a riddle tho? at best it's a lateral thinking puzzle, and a poor one at that.

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>>37801964
there are many things that could be correct but there is only one thing that is the the answer. You have to use all the pieces before you, you can't simply discard the ones you don't like.
>>37801993
It's a regular thinking puzzle. And how can you deem it poor if you can't even figure it out?

>>37802096
>how can you deem it poor if you can't even figure it out?
you don't have to solve a puzzle to know it's shit, here are two examples
>a man is in a room filled with frenchmen, on hands him a playing card with the word "tulips" written on it in poor handwriting, all of the men then instantly die except the one holding the card, why?
>a man is in a hermetically sealed steel box 2km underground, within which there is an atmosphere of pure gaseous hydrogen cyanide at 600bar but the man doesn't die ever, why?

if you can solve both And tell me why they are bad then i will concede that your argument is correct.

>>37802096
also
>there are many things that could be correct but there is only one thing that is the the answer.

this is why it's a shit puzzle

>>37801478
>solve my riddle
Your ""riddle"" is fucking stupid m8. There's nothing intelligent about it and so far all you're doing is breaking all records of retardation in this thread

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>>37802898
the man in the box was already dead and the man in the room misunderstood the directive on the card that was instructing him to kill himself in a cult murder kind of deal because he wasn't french.

Not the worst riddles I ever heard.

>>37802936
That's how mysteries work. There are many possibilities but only one right answer. Sure it's possible a stranger ran into someone's house and stabbed whatserface, but the most correct answer is O.J. Simpson. You have to use all the pieces of the puzzle and work it out.

You can't just say: Oh he raped her, because that leaves certain pieces of evidence unexplained. When everything fits together, it all tells you the truth of what happened. Honestly mister, if you put as much effort into solving this as you did into claiming it's impossible, you'd already be done with it. I believe in you.

>>37801765
No that would be stale mate

>>37796831
>Say's he's smarter than all of us
> Doesn't list IQ
> Doesn't share name or anything significant to indicate that he's in some way actually better
> Replys to joke posts like an edgy teenager
Go the fuck away you don't belong here. You're probably fifteen or younger with a superiority complex toward all those around you. Get outside and keep laughing at robots, become a fucking Chad ffs. You don't have to pretend you're better than normies if you have gains to make it so.

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>>37803199
Well, no one has solved my riddle. You know the game. Beat my and I go away. If you are up to the task.

>>37801528
H3 to g1 and f5 to h3 the one you're thinking about? Because that would be stalemate. And i can't see any other

>>37803179
Retard. This is a fictional riddle not a real one, so who's to say how you told it is how it would happen irl?. Like other anons have said it's badly writen, try harder

>>37803318
You're trying too hard to fit in its kind of obvious you're either baiting or underage with some kind of mental problem

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>>37796831
Smartness is all about perspective familia.
Sorry, but your idea of being smart is only that of your own opinion. Other peoples opinions can differ and will be just as valid as yours.

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>>37803318
What if I like you and don't want you to go away?

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>>37803387
oh but anon, you've activated my trap card. It is exactly how it would happen in real life. I told you before I am merely the transcriber, and not the writer. I solved this riddle before I presented it to anyone else. Can you do the same?

http://news.nationalpost.com/news/canada/full-transcript-of-judges-ruling-acquitting-halifax-cab-driver-of-sexual-assault-because-a-drunk-can-consent

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>>37803453
Oh, I have more riddles, even better ones! But no one is up to the task so far.

>>37803450
If I can envision things other people cannot, would I not be smarter than them?

You sound like some retard I know whose name starts with a J.

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>>37803454
Holy fucking shit you absolute retard. This isn't a riddle then you idiot, it's a actual criminal case and it's pretty obvious what happened how YOU wrote it and how it appears in the article. AND GUESS WHAT. MY ANSWER IS STILL VALID!!!>>37797907 WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED CAN ONLY BE ASSUMED. Which is why this fucking riddle of yours is fucking retarded. Just like you. Jesus fucking christ

>>37796831

You seem like an annoying faggot
to me. You should get help for your N.P.D.

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>>37803748
whew, good thing no one knows my real name irl that may or may not start with a J.
>>37803773
If you lose your temper it will make it harder to solve the mystery or puzzle or riddle or watchacallit. It matters not. Your answer is not valid, because it actually contradicts the evidence, as opposed to being a circumstantial possibility. But there is an answer that uses all the evidence and makes everything clear like a light in the darkness.

>>37803179
Nope. Not the right answer. Sorry, you don't get points for being creative.

>>37803851
which answer is wrong?

>>37803880
Your reply to the frenchman riddle thing

Ya like apples,OP?

>>37803896
Whelp, then the answer is that the card didn't read tulips, it read "tue les" which translates to "kill them". Then I presume he killed them, although I don't know if I could say how he managed that feat.

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>>37803918
Is this a trick? Maybe I do and maybe I don't why are you asking?

>>37797080
Is it a riddle you wrote in shit on your wall?

>>37803950
Just a simple question.

>>37797078
>FIFTY-SIX?!
https://youtu.be/XuMKWuVwWno
but how much poise is required to endure black flame (DS1)?

Im not gay but i love it up my ass, how to make it better?

op, are you still here? i was the one asking for contact earlier. i just meant if you had some sort of messaging, like a throwaway email or discord or something

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>>37803982
well, I guess they aren't bad. They are good with whipped cream

op you still here? i was asking for contact earlier, i just meant if you had some sort of messaging like a throwaway email or discord or something

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>>37804029
[email protected]

>>37804000
>>37804029
whoops haha
more bumps for you my friend

>>37804092
HAHA
so on top of it all you're a roastie as well?
Fuck off,jeez.

>>37803840
>contradicts the evidence
Whatever man i didn't even read it properly because it's fucking dumb. You better start sucking every dick in this thread because so far you've only managed to make yourself look like the biggest idiot on r9k. For real my man

>>37803933
Honestly, go fuck yourself you useless fucking attention whore.

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>>37804223
>>37804219
>>37804274

your game isn't even good. You have been utterly defeated by my sheer intellect.

You betas got b8ed once again, maybe OP is ironically right lmfao xD!

>>37796831
Do you have the McGuffin?

>>37804280
Lol. Yeah for sure. Ok to give you the benefit of the doupt, what is it exactly that makes you smarter than use simple brainlets?

>>37804280
You've shown you know how to troll faggots

>[email protected]
Let me guess, you're a roastie?

>>37804294
No. To bait someone it would imply that that person is making everybody look like an idiot. Have you read Op posts itt? Lol

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>>37804358
The riddle! No one can solve the riddle! No one has ever solved it! I've posted it dozens and dozens of times on all sorts of boards, even on reddit although like they had a fucking chance of understanding it even if I explained it to them.
Not /v/, nor /pol/ nor /x/ or you. I am all alone in knowing the solution.

>>37803454
Interesting. A real mystery, and an unsolved one. I still can't find a satisfactory answer as to why her purse and jacket would be in the front seat.

You should edit your original image though; if she did piss herself then there would almost certainly be bodily fluids on her, to some extent.

>>37804452
Uh as far as i can see in the article the case was solved? What are you talking about

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>>37804521
yeah I probably should but I am terribly lazy, and I don't think it's too gamebreaking. Although perhaps it is, since the fluids are very important to cracking the case, but at any rate, anytime someone shows actual promise in uncovering the solution, I let them have the full report rather than a meme image. I don't know which one would be easier, because my picture distilled what I think is relevant, but I solved it from the real reports obviously.

>>37804547
Then tell me what happened in that cab on that cold night in Halifax.

>>37804613
Jesus dude... The driver tried, succesfuly or unsuccesfuly, to have sex with the girl. The how and the why don't fucking matter because that isn't you question and i quote "what happened in the cab?". See how it's badly writen?

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>>37804720
Well, that's one possibility, but I don't think it's the truth. Doesn't anything strike you as unusual about this scene? Why don't you start by imagining how it should look if she was raped and compare it to how it actually does look.

A rare opportunity, honestly. The cops arrived and it's a perfect crime scene plus a locked room mystery where not even the victim knows the truth. I keep meaning to message her sometime my theory to ease her mind.

>>37804790
Anon.......This is your theory.....Doesn't mean it's real. If you knew jack shit about criminology you'd know that most cases are pretty straight forward and simple. No mystery involved. Now i'm really starting to think you have mental problems dude

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>>37796831
Nice bait faggot

askaakms

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>>37804882
You know, it's funny. Why don't we take a break from this riddle then and let me tell you a story about my own life. I won't hide the answer of this one from you for long.

One day, I woke up in the hospital. My memory was gone, and I had a head wound, which, you know, was the cause of the memory loss. Short term, only a day, the day I was attacked. I had the fortune of living in a scenario where I couldn't count on my own memory and had to rely on only evidence. My memory is typically impeccable. Delivered to me in my hospital bed were two documents from the police force. One was concerning the person who put me in the hospital and the other was about me. Basically, I was charged with sexual assault, grabbing a girl by the pussy, funnily enough, and obviously, the girl I grabbed was charged with assault for bashing my head in.

Now, with only these two documents to go off of, what would you think transpired? As much as I would hate to admit it, I think the only logical solution is that I fondled some broad, and then she attacked me, right? Would you concur?

>>37804790
Genuinely curious about what crazed theory you've come up with though. Please do tell

>>37805021
Aye, alright

>>37805021
Sure that would seem like a logical conclusion carry on

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>>37805076
>>37805115


You'd be wrong, just like I was. An outsider view looking in on my own life was fascinating. Of course it's the conclusion anyone would draw. So, I was getting ready for court, but a deal was able to be struck. Each of us would drop charges and that would be the end of it. Apparently you can do that. My love of not taking a chance in court and spending tons of money on a lawyer won out obviously and so all the charges went nowhere. Then after the last form was signed I asked the responding officers to tell me what happened. I had it completely backwards. On that day, I was just randomly attacked, and apparently, I really did grab her vagina somehow, but the order was what matters. I sustained the unprovoked head injury and then committed the sexual assault while I was fighting back.

It makes no sense. It's not the "logical" answer. If you never delved deeper than the surface it would look completely ridiculous to an outsider, as I was able to see. Do you see why I tell this story now? Don't fall into the trap that there is no other possibilities. You can trust me when I tell you there is something none of you are seeing in this Halifax case. It's as simple as uncovering the contradictions.

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>>37805050
My resolve for keeping it hidden might be weakening, particularly since I do plan to send it to newspapers sometime as this case is still active in the courts. They are appealing the acquittal.

But I want people to learn. You don't learn if I just hand out the answer like candy. You'll never challenge yourself that way. But maybe I really am just some sherlockian genius although I don't like to think of myself that way.

>>37804592
It threw me off at first because I was trying to think of reasons that she might have pissed on the jeans after taking them off. The fact that the jeans are inside-out is also an important point.

Anyway, I can't conclude anything more than the judge already did. The fact that the taxi was parked in a secluded area and the driver's pants were undone seems to pretty clearly indicate he intended to have sex with her.

I'm really not sure what the contradictions are supposed to be here. Her purse in the front seat? If it weren't for that I'd say she pissed herself waiting, got in the back and passed out, then the driver took them to a secluded area and lifted her legs over the front seat so that he could easily removed her pants, with the intention of having sex with her.

>>37805237
Ok sure. Interesting story you have there. But the verdict has already been reached in that other case. Your theory whether or not you're connecting the dots, has to stand in a court of law. And seeing as you're having second hand information here i'd rather trust the word of the people actually involved in the investigation. Any guy can come up with their own answers that sound right. That's how conspiracy theories are born

>>37805328
Look dude, get your head out of your ass. You're some crack pot who's come up with some far fetched theory that you don't want to share with anyone because you think it's fucking genius and you love the fact that only you know the answer, right?. You need to get real mate

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>>37805441
Well, I have ordered all the investigation reports to be sent to me, but the machinations of government turn so slowly. I doubt I'll uncover anything new, but I want to look at it nonetheless. The media bias in this story is terrible, it's sheer luck those idiots wrote the right facts that gave me the insight I need. They thought they were sealing the coffin on him but it's just the opposite. But yes, the verdict was not guilty, but that was due to a technicality and not actual belief in his innocence. I contend he did nothing untoward towards that female.

>>37796831
>claims Is smart
>watches evangelion
Why even bother with you, lmao

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>>37805529
I abhor the fact that no one can reach the conclusion I have. I wish there was someone out there who could match me. Thus far, I have still come up empty.
>>37805436
not bad, but you know it's not right. Right sorta track though.
>>37805536
evangelion is my flavourite show

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>>37796831

Were you smart enough to invest in ethereum back in january?

I was and now I'm a rich NEET, BRAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP, smell that wagie?

That's the smell of success.

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>>37805666
huh good for you

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>>37805906

So I guess I'm far smarter than you then lol.

>>37806019
can you solve my riddle, then?

>>37796831
Words show only minute intelligence.
Let's just settle this in the online chess ring if you think you're so tough.

What is your account?

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>>37797327
>you used that picture I posted in a past thread of yours
Neat.

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>"I'm actually smarter than all of you."
>posts Asuka
You already proved yourself the dumbest on your own first post!

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>>37806244
the search never ends I have a new commission coming right now too

>>37806173
i don't have an account

>>37797174
The driver took off her panties and purse and flip flops and sniffed em n shiet

>>37805618
Are you an ENTP? Your theory sounds like one you'd need an Ne dominant function stack to come up with.

Your theory is not necessarily accurate anon

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>>37806944
I played all the phoenix wright games. The story has a, well, obviously not glaring, contradiction. Of course, my theory might be incorrect but it's compelling.

Just go through the version of events as the official story has them and then examine all the evidence. if the "rape" theory is correct, then what should be in that vehicle, but isn't?

>>37807118
I'm not saying he raped her. No bodily fluids

Contradiction is there's no fluid on her seat or her but her panties covered in piss. Maybe the guy had a piss fetish and pissed on her panties and was self sexual and sniffed them himself. Maybe she pissed at the bar while drunk and it was all absorbed by the super absorbent panties. Who knows man who fuckin knows

>>37796965
What is it anon
Original-z

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>>37807184
Now you are getting somewhere, old chum. Her panties are covered in urine but there's no fluid on the seat.

What does that mean to you?

>>37807274
Is there pee on her legs? It must mean that she peed as her legs were put up onto the seat or her panties didn't leak or they did but the pee had long enough to dry off the seat but that's unlikely because pee stains deeply so it must mean she peed after her legs were propped onto the front seats

I'm ENTP/ENFP by the way just saying that's why I type like this not because I'm dumb but because I just can't STOP

>>37796831
I'm a MENSA member, sup

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>>37807346
Does that feel like the answer to you?

>>37796831
Gosh you people are retarded if you actually think you're more intelligent than the average person, You're not, and you sit on 4chan all day

you lost the moment you made a thread on /r9k/

>>37807433
Does that feel like the answer? By ffeel I assume you're referring to what my intuition tells me and it senses that there is more to this problem than that.

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>>37807356
>He thinks hes smart than other people

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>>37807462
I actually am though, my riddle remains uncontested.

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>>37796831
Without using google or any other search engine tell me whats the longest word in Finnish language?
Alternatively tell me the origin story of Spurdo, no usage of internet allowed.

if you guys are having this much trouble with my taxi riddle, which took me mere hours to solve, imagine if I dropped one of the problems I spent years solving on you fools.

>>37807647
Knowing things doesn't mean you're intelligent my boy

You can be a smart ass dude and know nothing or you can be an all knowing buffoon who can spout facts facts facts

>>37807647
Your problem is so laughably circumvented it's not even worth me walking to the library to look it up. Just pretend I did.

>>37807647
I think I can do the spurdo one.
Spurdo Sparde started as a corruption of Pedobear on a Finnish imageboard and it was merged with Pepe (I think) to form the Spurdo that we know. Also it was used to take the piss out of the Finnish army.

How close was I?

>>37807433
>sniffing pair of panties
>stuffs into console
>urine covered panties on passenger seat

Hmmmmm

The panties he was sniffing came from her, as he had her DNA on him, but the urine covered panties must've been from another source

>>37807676
You are not very intelligent if you cant point out the origin of Spurdo, it is pretty obvious.
Hint: it was a thing here, related to Japan.
But its ok you may be a newfriend. Come on put on your thinking cap and tell me, you can do it.

>>37807841
I already know the gist of the history - it was as the other anon said, pedobear got morphed into spurdo. I'm a newfriend, in relative terms - been here for 2 years

Anyway, not knowing something does not mean you're unintelligent. If someone has never encountered spurdo they may be the greatest genius ever but would not be able to tell you a thing about him

The only way extreme intelligence could get by not knowing about spurdo sparde is in the first place is if someone is so very very intelligent that they can simulate the entire universe in their mind based on what they've observed and pinpoint spurdo's history within their simulated universe

But I am not that intelligent and someone of that caliber of smarticles likely never has nor ever will exist. The probability is probably zero point very many zeroes one

>>37807737
HEllo oP what do you think about this information i presented, could you possibly give me a nod or a head shake to tell me if I'm onto something here?

Also when the cops determine at tbhe end that the panties belonged to the girl did they mean the panties he stuffed into the console or the urine soaked ones on the chair, or both?

>>37807994
I don't know where this dual panties notion is coming from although that would be amusing. There is only one pair of panties, soaked with urine.

>>37808024
>holding a pair of panties he stuffs into the center console to conceal
>pair of pants soaked in urine

I WAS THHINKKING TOO FAST THAT I MISREAD PANTS AS PANTIES

WELL WELL WELL THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING

hmmmmmmmmmmm

Driver was sitting in the drivers seat and sees the girl pass out, dick gets hard. Pullls over to somewhere secluded, turns around, pulls her legs onto his seat - she is in back passenger seat diagonal from him. As he does this she soaks her pants in pee cause drunk and passed out, so he takes off her pants and puts them on the front seat, flip flops and purse too to make room and also cause he has foot fetish. Takes off panties to sniff and leaves her there, doesn't rape her but just sniffs panties and jacks off

Point out any holes you see or simply say that it's wrong and don't telll
Me how and I'll try to improve it

>>37807942
If you are so intelligent why did you confirm your newfaggotry?

>>37808163
no urine was found on the seats

>>37808217
Because there's no reason to withhold information from someone who can't do any harm to me

>>37808218
Right, as he pulled her legs up onto his seat, she peed. Her legs were in such a position that thhe pants could be soaked but they weren't actually close enough to the seats to transmit pee

My theory is valid and fits all parameters and is simple - past this point we're just coming up with hypotheticals, unless you have something even simpler that also works, or I'm missing something. And the way I set my theory up, no pee was on the seats

>>37808333
No bodily fluids were found on her either.

Is the purse in the front seat to prevent her from using her phone/pepper spray/something else, if she were to wake up?

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ops dumb enough to think anyone here cares about him or how intelligent he is

>>37808333
Well, I believe each leg was discovered on each seat, and not two legs on the driver's seat.

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>>37808333
I'm skeptical of the notion that lifting her legs up would prevent urine from reaching the seats. Piss yourself and tell me what happens. remember to prop your legs up first.

>>37808408
Did she start off sitting in the front seat but was pregnant and had to give birth and the pants were used to hold the baby so they got peed on and she left her flip flops and purse in the front caus she started there and her panties were off cause of the baby and the DNA on his lip was from him kissing the babies forehead and her legs were wide open to help her give birth?

>>37808508
>>37808554
Are these both OP? Going with my original theory and not the pregnancy one, the pants were soiled, it could've been just a drip of pee. I've peed my pants when high before but just a little bit so it wouldn't spread. If she peed into her panties and it transferred to the pants, it could've wicked it away from her and she didn't get wet or barely got peed on

>>37808631
The report states they were soaked.

So according to your theory, she got in the cab, passed out immediately, was driven away, and as he was propping her legs up, she urinated, and so he removed these garments, while still sitting in the front seat. Then the cops appeared and he tried to hide the clothes, and at some point in time he also moved her stuff to the front seat.

That's what you're going with?

>>37808765
>>37808765
>is a pair of pants /soiled/ by urine
Says soiled not soaked, infinite difference

Also, that's not what I'm saying. She starts in the back seat, and after she passes out, he props her legs up. After he does this, she pees herself, so he removes her pants to access panties for his fetish, flip flops for his foot fetish, and purse either to peruse it for more lewd stuff, or she put it there at first because she was too drunk to think, or to hide her phone and stuff from her. Anyway, he leaves her in that position while he sniffs her panties and the cops come and he gets arrested

>>37808893
Okay, so he has both a panty urine and a foot fetish. If these fetishes are what he is trying to fulfill, is this positioning not terribly awkward? Why would he not just go in the backseat with her? Why prop the feet up behind his head?

>>37797174
driver is owner operator for taxi service and is off duty, he picks up the girl at the bar, drunk off her ass so she pissed herself and was willing to go home with a taxi driver, she needs to change and driver suggests she strip for him, she agrees and puts her flops and purse in the passenger seat, then strips her pants and partially her panties off, throwing the pants in the front. The driver is distracted by the show she's giving him, and isnt paying attention to the road, girl has been on the edge of passing out the whole time, and being upside down doesnt help, she passes out, officer is on patrol and spots the distracted driver, who, noticing hes being pulled over slams on the brakes, throwing panties to the front, picks them up then realizes how it looks and stuffs them into the center console. He is arrested on suspicion of rape.

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>>37804280
>Sheer intellect
>Doesn't know what a riddle is.
YOU TRIED SO HARD AND GOT SO FAR BUT IN THE END, YOU'RE JUST ANOTHER ROASTIE.

>>37808990
Because if he props the feet next to his head he can have both feet rubbing up against his face while sniffing panties, and also - after he yanks the pants off of her, his chair is the easiest place to put them while keeping her feet close to him. He doesn't wanna move to the back, he's already too aroused.

>>37809132
do you think this is what transpired?

>>37809147
Anything could have transpired as long as it fits the paramaters of the situation, and as far as I can tell, my theory does fit those parameters. It is one possibility that I have come up with, I could come up with another if you'd like - the pregnancy example was a different twist. Do tell me anon, what is your theory, I've spent a lot of time on this and I think it'd be fair for you to tell me what you've come up with

>>37801528
c4 to e5 and h2 to g1

>>37809213
but do you think it's what happened?

>>37809217
>h2 to g1
I don't play much chess, but I thought you couldn't put yourself in check?

>>37809253
>>37809217
Nvm you said g1 not g2, I'm retarded.

>>37809233
No, I do not think it's what happened. It doesn't work beautifully enough and I also feel like there's a hidden aspect to this puzzle that I'm not seeing. Furthermore, it is unlikely that the girl would pee right after he propped her legs up. However, it's a possibility. Can you tell me your theory, O great master of riddles

Oh well, it was a good thread. Feelsbad that I was unable to solve it and that op won't share the answer. But, was fun anyway

>>37808408
Adding on to what I said:
Her sandals were also under the taxi driver's feet. Might this be another precaution in case she tried to run away?

It also did not mention whether he had a condom or not. I would think those intending to rape wouldn't want to leave evidence, but I know that's not always the case.

A wild theory would be that he was in the middle of changing into her clothes. I wonder if he looked feminine.

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>>37797547
There are actually people out there, right now, sharing the same planet, maybe even the same country, as you, who are this insufferable. And worse, they won't stay on Reddit. Truly we live in trying times.

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>>37809295
The woman entered the cab. Front seat, I believe. They drove and she requested he pull over so she could urinate. She leaves her items in the front seat, her money, her purse, etcetera. The lack of urine in the car is explained simply by not having her urinate in the vehicle. However, it is at this point she passes out and pisses her pants, as they are pulled down. The Taxi Driver now has a dilemma on his hands. Does he waste the time calling 911 or does he just pack her up and take her home? He chooses to just drop her off himself. There is another problem though. She's fucking covered in piss. He could send her a bill for the cleaning, but that is extra effort and he still has to put up with a pissy workplace, which is unsuitable. He decides to take her pants, panties, and shoes the rest of the way off. This explains why she was only stripped from the waist down and he didn't unveil her jugs. Those articles of clothing were clean. And now, as we carry her unconscious body to the cab, there's another problem. Even with her nakedness, her legs themselves are still covered with urine and will get on his seats. What does he do? He props the legs up on the two front seats. I call it the clean seats theory. Every action he took adds up to a man simply trying to keep his car clean, a trait anyone who has ridden in a cab will know is common amongst the drivers of them. Then the police approach. He immediately realizes just how this appears, panicks, and tries to conceal the garments.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7V9L_NxHkWM

>>37809514
That's certainly a compelling theory. However, didn't the text say she would always sit in the back passenger seat? And why would his pants be unzipped and somewhat down his legs?

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>>37797080
Tell me how do you put six holes in one hole? Physics related

>>37809514
That's a good theory but I don't think it's any more probably than mine. I like it nonetheless, all ideas have merit and are possible

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>>37809591
He was probably going to redress her in his own pants, another thing that would be easy to do with the legs of hers in that position. He certainly can't just drop off a half naked girl. Her initial seat isn't terribly relevant. If she sat in the backseat originally, then he just moved her items to the front seat to make room for her to lie down. Or she simply sat in an irregular position.

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>>37809638
Your theory is simply plausible, and has loads of conjecture. I don't know if I've even heard of someone having two fetishes before, if that supposition is to be believed.

>>37809645
Hmm, I like it. This was pretty neat, OP.

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>and in the end, I was right again. I was the smartest person on 4chan, at least, for no one could ever solve my riddle
>forever undefeated

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>>37809772
you're theory isn't right just because its yours though

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>>37809849
It's a riddle I cobbled together. Obviously inspired by real events but I created the answer and no one was able to articulate it.

Perhaps it isn't what happened in the real case, but it's definitely the solution to my riddle. And please don't try to attempt appearing smarter than me. You look like a fool, I just finished proving I am the smartest. None of you weakminded fools had the temerity to see the puzzle through, or perhaps just don't possess the ability.

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>>37809979
okok i am the smartest hey diddle diddle time for MY riddle you have to say exactly what i think because anything else will prove me superior

1 man walk through woods alone at dark, he get spook and start run, he trip but he ok so he keep going, he come across abandon car but that not very important to him so he keep going and he make it safely back home. WHO CAR WAS IT???????

>>37809979
Dude, you just wrote a story. Calm down.

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>>37810049
>>37810109
Where were all these challengers when the challenge was here? You know, if you guys actually put your mind to things, you could accomplish great tasks.

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>>37810146
ahem i believe there is a riddle needs answering
or r u ready to accept that i am the smartest tat ever was???

>>37810146
I'm not challenging you, as this >>37810180 autist is so eloquently trying to show, the fact that you made both the riddle and the answer doesn't prove you have some great and stupefying intellect, it just proves you have a decent imagination
and a superiority complex

>>37809668
I hhave a foot fetish and I am into anal. Bam, two fetishes. Also, your theory is also simply plausible. Anything else could have happened as well

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>>37810314
I didn't just make it, I solved it. Something no one else could do.

>>37810372
anal doesn't count as a fetish. That's like saying kissing is a fetish.

My theory accounts for all unusual occurrences and is supported logically every step of the way. It's as robust as they come. Certainly better than the "official" theory, of which, hardly one exists. They charged him but had no idea how the events transpired. They just assumed he was up to no good because they caught him with a naked passed out girl.

>>37810146
I was the challenger towards the end, your raving ENTP friend. Just because no one else came up with the same theory as you doesn't mean that you are smart and we are all dumb, it means that you were creative in a different way than others. As long as a story fits all parameters, it is as probable as yours

>>37796831
What can objectively be said about spirituality, politics, and philosophy?

>>37810377
But the fact that you made the riddle meant that the solution was always going to be what you said it was. Every other theory that the anons have posted is equally valid, and you can bet your ass if they made the riddle instead of you, yours would be the one that's "simply plausible."

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>>37810440
>idiots trying to speak to me

You're worthless. Next time, rise to the occasion.

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>>37810377
ummmmm something you want to tell me????
mayhaps that you cant solve my riddle with your tiny tiny baby brain???

>>37810422
But my story accounted for the unusual occurrences as well friend.

Also, I have not just a foot and anal fetish, but a coughing and sneezing fetish. When a female friend of mine who had a cold rested her bare feet on my lap, well, that was one of the most powerful erections I've ever had

>>37799332
i really want to believe that, but a lot of intelligent people i met were massive weaboos.

>>37810476
Well, the fact that I didn't sniff out the bait earlier may prove that I'm an idiot after all.

>>37810429
You have some promise, but you got stuck in a bit of a rut. Almost like you decided he had to have done something wrong and was going to do whatever it takes to make your fetish theory work rather than drop things when they aren't quite fitting.

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>>37810484
Well, that is surprising if you're not lying. two unrelated fetishes, huh? how interesting.

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>>37810521
Weakling. Always justifying everything to preserve your stunted self-image. You had your chance for me to consider what you said worthwhile, but that time has passed. And now you sit and try to spin me as less intelligent and that I am some master baiter to appease your shrivelled self-worth.

hey if you need a bf lemme know, I'm available.

>>37804223
this guy is smarter than you OP

>>37796831
>>37810432
Answer me you original rancid swine :)

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>>37810432
>politics
It's cyclical
>philosophy
I objectively hate it
>spirituality
too little of it these days

>>37796831
>feel invalidated irl
>prey on men victim to hypermasculinity and unreasonable expectations of men

You're like a Stacy, with more intellectual, than sexual selfworth

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>>37810717
>hates philosophy

>>37810526
I considered that he wasn't actually a criminal, I was somewhat sure that that's what you intended. However, since any theory could have worked, I decided it was easier to stick to one possibility than open Pandora's Box and try to pinpoint the one you were thinking of out of the infinite possibilities.

>>37810561
Yeah, feet have always turned me on. I think I got the coughing fetish from my OCD - used to be extremely paranoid about germs. People coughing would give me anxiety and frustration but for some reason also a little bit of an penile sensation. One day some Stacy bitch wanted to mess with me by fake coughing on me and god damn did it arouse me, so there we are, two fetishes. I'm also quite partial to rape and abuse, your story really did arouse me. But I'd never enact such an awful thing in real life

>>37810717
Why do you hate philosophy? Seems like it'd be right up your alley

>>37810717
confirmed brainlet

>>37810644
This seems like projecting. You couldn't stomach what I said (the truth) and had no logical response beyond calling me an idiot and more hollow self-aggrandizing so I suppose I just hoped it was bait.
>stunted self-image
Dude, you centered your entire persona around a fictional character, What are you, stupid?

>>37810845
I think it's a venue for worthless people to circlejerk about how smart they are while never actually finding a solution to anything. No matter how hard they try, the point of philosophy means they won't reach a concrete answer.

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>>37810881
>there's no real answer to the riddle
>it doesn't count cause OP wrote it, OP's not really that smart
>it's bait!!!
>OP is p-projecting...

>>37811020
Yeah, that's all pretty accurate, except I didn't stutter on the last one and I've mostly changed my mind about the bait. Going to refute anything I've said?

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>>37811088
Why bother? You're too dumb.

>>37796831
is the sensory really intuitive?

>>37811109
Alright, I'm done with this. Not going to lie OP, this thread really made me feel better about my own intelligence and level of self-awareness - so thanks.

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>>37811148
Of course it did, it's a necessary self-preservation instinct in you people to always delude yourself and preserve the bubble of stagnation you reside in. If you took in the reality of the situation and realized you were incapable of solving my riddle, you would walk away thinking you should improve yourself. Instead, you claim that you are more intelligent despite failing completely, so you can carry on in the same state as always until you fail another challenge and delude yourself all over again.

Why people do that, I wonder if I'll ever solve it. Sorry I was unable to help you break your shell this time.

Hey OP you've piqued my interest.
There's a question I like to ask everyone who claims to be of exceptional intelligence.
What is wrong with the world and what should be done to fix it?

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>>37811411
Your question is amusingly unspecific, those questions can be fun.

Today we live in turmoil because we are experiencing a reformation. People like to think we are watching a rerun of the 20th century what with the nazis and the cold war and so on. People only say that because it's what they are familiar with. We are watching a rerun though, but a very old one. People say the reformation started with the printing press, but that's not true. It took twenty years or so after before the reformation really kicked into gear. You couldn't just drop the printing press into people's laps and expect them to all suddenly be educated overnight. It takes time for this effect to disperse. We live in a similar time frame since the inception of the internet. They call it a paradigm shift.

So, what we see as "wrong" with the world might be us going through the growing pains to become more enlightened. Time will tell.

>>37811589
The question is meant to be unspecific
The purpose behind it is simple, to test what value of importance one assigns things in the world. and to see if they have the capability of coming up with a solution
I like that answer, what would you say is the next milestone humanity as a whole needs to overcome?

>>37811843
I know what you were doing. And I'll tell you what the next milestone we need to overcome is if you tell me what the previous one was.

>>37811986
oooh a challenge
some would say the last milestone was creating a stalemate between hostile nations through the development of nuclear technology giving birth to a real global peace that has not been experienced throughout all of history, that being said only time will tell if the temporary peace lasts long enough for true peace to happen
The internet is also a good candidate for a milestone but i'd say its true capabilities aren't even done being realized

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>>37812346
I know what I hope for.

>>37810895
>I think it's a venue for worthless people to circlejerk about how smart they are while never actually finding a solution to anything
Yeah sounds dreadful, jerking off about supposed knowledge without coming to any definite answer.

>>37813380
Quite indeed

>>37809514
Didn't the article say she was naked from the waste upwards?. Jesus thanks for wasting everybodys time with your """riddle""". Retard
>HURR HURR IMMA FUCKING GENIUS AND ONLY MY THEORY IS VALID
Fuck off

Okay OP, you fucking faggot, solve turbulence quantitatively and qualitatively.

Kek OP can't even solve turbulent flow.

Confirmed pleb

>>37813657
Ah but he made and solved his own riddle tho. Op is on a complete different intellectual level from the rest of us mortals

I'm still trying to figure out how you soil panties with flip-flops.

>>37796965
Was it 56 in DKS1?