Storytime: How I lost my virginity in the Army

>>37743781
jesus christ origialni

Continued. . .

Later on
>Sgt's laughing their asses off
>embarrassed af
>meet with first sgt and commander
>Get article 15
>counseling statement
>14 days extra duty
>months pay taken away
>demoted from PV2 to PVT
>fucking sucks to be me
>still virgin loser
>later on learn sgt went in there looking for sports equipment
>just my luck

Time passes
>Duty station get put on hold so I have to stay at AIT for extra month
>Cumslut still wants to phug my virgin weiner
>Ok.png
>Im fucking desperate to lose this virginity
>meet at picnic tables near barracks
>start making out in broad daylight in open field
>retardism-activate.jpg
>she starts stroking my pre-cum soaked cock
>wraps crusty acne scarred mouth around cock
>stupid slut I think to myself
>terrible blowie joey
>disgusting/10
>used teeth, very painful
>tries giving handie mannie
>also painful
>can't fum
>go back to room with blueballs
>swollen-glands.jpg
>beat off
Later learn people on hall guard saw, obviously
>sgt's hear about it
>back in commanders office
>tells me I'll be kicked out if im caught with her again
>block her number from my phone
>tell her to fuck off

pussy's pussy.
nobody really cares.

congrats I guess, makes me feel better about how I lost my virginity to a mother of 3, kek

Continued. . .

Sometime later
>she's begging to talk to me
>hoe-needs-that-dick.png
>give in because ~virginity~
>virginity = no standards
>offers me pussy that looks like someone beat an egg in it
>whatevs pussie iz pussie
>amiritefellas.png
She sends countless nudes
>lose appetite
>hold back urge throw up and throw phone across room
>whatevs I'll still hit it
>plan to meet in dayroom again
>this time at night 10 mins. before room check
>nobody should be in at this time
>perfect-plan.jpg
Later on
>negroes in common room next door playing vidya
>fuck it, i go past to the computer room
>continueonwiththemission.jpg
>I let her in through back door
>we start making out
>she takes off shorts and gets on top
>her gut hangs and rests on my abs
>pull out condom
>wrappeduptight.png
>cant find vagina because virgin
>she grabs cock and plunges it in
>she gives a good 3 to 4 pumps then asks if I want to switch
>uselessfathoe.png
>I get on top
>she has to guide my cock in again
>start thrusting
>Computer room door prys open
>ohfucknotagain.jpg
>freeze in position on top of her
>room is dark
>"wtf nigga"
>door closes
>it was just the negroes next door playing vidya
>"we should leave" cumslut says
>"fuck that, once I finish" I say
>start thrusting again
>turn on the boosters
Negroes peek in two more times
>Idgaf I'm reaching mach speeds
>her gelatenous body ebbs with the thrusts of my cock
>she stares at me blankly, no moaning, because my cock cant compete with a dindus
>idgaf
>keep going until go-gurt
>maximum-splash.gif
>get up, pull up shorts and run out back door to room
>condom still on dick with semen in it
>notice she squirted all over my shorts
>realize I left condom wrapper in computer room
>dont care, casually stand outside door for room check
>mark date in phone as "Lost virginity" April 13, 2017 at 9:30 pm

And that's how I lost my virginity. I'll post some pics and text messages she sent if asked.

File: 1478758193294.gif (161KB, 500x375px) Image search: [Google]

161KB, 500x375px

this is a good thread have a bump OP
take note autists, if you reeee about being a virgin your standards just need to go lower

More pics,I'm curious about how ugly she is.

Demoted due to dirty pussy. Might as well share everything boot.

>>37743945
>implying i know a fat roastie willing to fuck me
>implying i am as attractive as op
>implying army soldiers are not appealing to girls.

>army
>looking for women

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

If you want woman who are above a 5/10, look into the Air Force.

that's one nasty fuckin' normalfag, sarge.

>>37744148
>the branch that has the most fatties
>attractive women
lol what the fuck are you thinking nigger

File: 1497591993366.png (171KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

171KB, 534x950px

you can't just delete things off the internet OP

File: text 2.png (178KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

178KB, 534x950px

Ok here's some of the messages we sent to each other

File: text 3.png (170KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

170KB, 534x950px

Here's some more messages between me and cumslut

File: text 4.png (166KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

166KB, 534x950px

Yet more messages between me and the one I refer to as cum slut

File: 1478847353913.jpg (56KB, 680x598px) Image search: [Google]

56KB, 680x598px

>>37744240
>my veiny tube
>>37744325
>this whole conversation
>>37744341
>you've still had sex with more people than me
>using this line as a man

File: text 5.png (129KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

129KB, 534x950px

Even more messages between me and this wildabeast

>>37744240
lol op you fucked up
her number ain't blocked out.
>>37744325
>>37744341
>>37744365

You should write dialogue for doujins and VNs

File: text 6.png (189KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

189KB, 534x950px

Please for the love of god. I forgot to block out her number from that image. please delete it. don't call that hoe. I hope she changed her number

File: 1463839989134.jpg (158KB, 720x480px) Image search: [Google]

158KB, 720x480px

>>37744403
>blatantly insult her
>she still wants to fuck

>>37744403
some fag will call her...probably.

PLEASE DON'T FUCKING CALL HER. I WONT POST PICS SHE SENT IF YOU DON'T DELETE THAT SHIT

>>37744471

Delete the image yourself brah

File: 1492810120858.jpg (18KB, 248x189px) Image search: [Google]

18KB, 248x189px

>>37744471
You have to say uncle OP

File: 1497294664857.jpg (62KB, 309x305px) Image search: [Google]

62KB, 309x305px

>>37744471
Oh well, I guess no pics then.

>veiny tube

File: Ahh I've been expecting you.jpg (48KB, 428x700px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 428x700px

>>37744471
ur fucked

its not like anyone wants to see pictures of her anyway lulz

Someone please call her and tell her OP is interested in her but too shy

File: IMG_2114.jpg (33KB, 559x556px) Image search: [Google]

33KB, 559x556px

>>37744471
Kek,

RIP OP

File: grinch.jpg (50KB, 500x671px) Image search: [Google]

50KB, 500x671px

>>37744471

better get in my reaction image now

>>37744471
Idk if you're baiting or not, but you reacting like that will definitely make someone call her kek

File: hoe 1.png (344KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

344KB, 534x950px

Fuck it, here you go you savages

File: hoe 2.png (196KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

196KB, 534x950px

Some more of that hoe

File: hoe 3.png (410KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

410KB, 534x950px

Yet more of that hoe

>Ohhhh nooo I accidentally forgot to blur the number pls don't call it would ruin my life :(((
OP obviously set this up to fuck with someone you idiots

File: hoe 4.png (366KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

366KB, 534x950px

I really dont give a shit anymore

>>37744674
>>37744682
>>37744686

Disgusting. I'm calling now.

based OP
what the fuck happened to her tits
why do they look so sad

File: hoe 5.png (399KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

399KB, 534x950px

You would think I would check for something like a number on the top left corner

>>37744701
shes not as fat as you made her out to be

I don't get it, she's not gross OP. Or are my standards too low?

File: fun times for me.gif (2MB, 320x218px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 320x218px

>>37743781
thanks this made me gay

>>37744674
>>37744682
>>37744686
>>37744701
You couldn't pay me to fuck that, she looks like soggy bread, jesus christ.

File: hoe 6.png (339KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

339KB, 534x950px

Yeah no i didnt do that

>>37744706
record it faggot

orimgalsy

>>37744471
Ah yah done goofed.

Should call the cyberpolice and back trace it brah

File: hoe 7.png (406KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

406KB, 534x950px

I didn't block out her number from the first image. This should be interesting

File: hoe 8.png (468KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

468KB, 534x950px

Yet more images of the hoe

>>37744756
fuck me youre so stupid you already posted a picture of with the polaroid unblurred

File: hoe 9.png (407KB, 500x888px) Image search: [Google]

407KB, 500x888px

Just a couple more images then I'll be done

>>37744729
I was thinking the same thing. Now the story isn't as good

>implying /r9k/ is alpha enough to even attempt calling this thot

>>37744802
someone should post the number on /b/ then

File: hoe 11.png (450KB, 500x888px) Image search: [Google]

450KB, 500x888px

this says image 11 because I decided image 10 wasn't that great

File: hoe 12.png (383KB, 500x888px) Image search: [Google]

383KB, 500x888px

Last image

>>37744814
I'd fug it

>>37744829
>>37744825
nevermind that red face holy jesus

>>37744825
oh fuck thats nasty

>>37744825
Yo, he wasn't lying about the acne; god damn son

>>37744227
Im not black if you were calling me a nigger

>>37744587
Bro fuck you

>>37744904
I was responding to some chairforce cuck

File: Screenshot_2017-06-16-02-38-38.png (65KB, 720x1280px) Image search: [Google]

65KB, 720x1280px

:^))))))))))))))

This original reeeeee

File: 1476308724537.png (364KB, 577x308px) Image search: [Google]

364KB, 577x308px

>>37744961
oregano madman

>>37744961
what a fucking fag smfh

>>37744825
op has evolved into a killing machine

File: IMG_2118.jpg (28KB, 324x278px) Image search: [Google]

28KB, 324x278px

>>37744961
You better hope she changed her number OP

>>37744990
>implying he doesnt deserve to get rekt for bragging about fucking a 2/10

>>37743886
> tfw my girl left me for a Chad on April 13th, 2017 around 9 PM

File: 6291336+_4060af1467586ccfe1b3138d6522a7b2.jpg (48KB, 400x600px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 400x600px

This whole thread was a mistake

>>37745058
What will you do now?

oregano commento

>>37744961
You had this coming OP. Non-virgins trade no place here

>>37745058
Did she blow your phone up yet anon?

File: Thanking.png (6KB, 101x111px) Image search: [Google]

6KB, 101x111px

EVERY TIME there's a thread like this, the OP or the girl in the OP ends up getting doxxed. Why do people still do this shit? Whatever, I still enjoyed your misfortune while it lasted.

this reads like bad bait for r/4chan or some shit
even the greentext is like something from /b/ circa 2011

>>37745098
how about you fuck off back to r*ddit nigger

>>37745103
i dont even go to reddit. people just post the screencaps from that place here.
it always looked super tryhard. like they're trying to be /b/ so bad

File: IMG_0687.jpg (18KB, 326x230px) Image search: [Google]

18KB, 326x230px

>>37744403
>I was gonna ask if you were abused as a child
>your package was beaten with a sledgehammer
OP that flamethrower is gonna kill someone one day, never seen that many burns on a person that still survived

File: 1497581131553s.jpg (3KB, 125x125px) Image search: [Google]

3KB, 125x125px

this is some quality faggotry my fellow gay lords

Someone should screen cap it and set up a link you can text to the #

File: IMG_0849.gif (293KB, 500x278px) Image search: [Google]

293KB, 500x278px

This thread's going off the fucking rails.

It's beautiful

>>37743781
knowing that a virgin robot can pass basic training in the army gives me confidence and makes me realize maybe I should join after all.

>>37744961
>no update
OP lucked out

File: 1459328886325.jpg (24KB, 500x375px) Image search: [Google]

24KB, 500x375px

OP you seem like a real asshole, perfect for the military

hope you are one day able to see beyond yourself

>>37745229
assmad roastie detected
original

For the girl OP barely managed to fuck: come to Texas. You seem worth knocking up.

>>37745093
No, she hasn't text me yet. She probably changed her number

omg, it like seeing a guy burring himself alive

>>37745318
>that anxious feeling until you found out if any one actually called her

>>37745131
thanks bruh, I try

>>37744961
I want an update

>>37745451
she probably changed her number, how long ago was it?

>>37745466
After April 13th at 9:30 pm I pretty much stopped talking to her

>>37745532
Why should she change her numbers in two months? If it were years we are talking about maybe you could get lucky, but with only two months you can be sure she saw it and is thinking what do to.

Maybe you should call her or something.

>>37745532
>>37745579
kek maybe she just hasn't read it yet or thinks its spam

File: text 7.png (219KB, 534x950px) Image search: [Google]

219KB, 534x950px

UPDATE:
Ok so I blocked her from my phone and as I went to unblock her I saw that Messages actually saves blocked messages. So here a message I got while she was blocked.

>>37744471
YOU WILL GET WHATS COMING TO YA NORMIE

>>37744997
>be cottage cheese looking whore
>thirsty enough for attention that you would fuck an anon from /r9k/
>suddenly everyone is giving you attention through your leaked number
>implying she would block the number
Yeah. Something tells me the number isn't blocked.

>>37744403
>Ur shit looks all distorted and warped.
>I was gonna ask if u were physically abused as a child.
>It looks like ur package was beaten with a sledge hammer

>>37745624
>I wanted you to know all I can think about is you.
>I'm a moth drawn to you as a flame

Jesus
Fucking
Christ

File: MORON.png (82KB, 640x480px) Image search: [Google]

82KB, 640x480px

>>37745624
ah yes. the post virginity clinger. classic

>>37745914
I can only assume this is the work of an [E N E M Y C H A D]

Seriously, those fuckers work miracles.

>>37745903
Lol her nickname was actually cottage cheese legs

File: 1478656813121.jpg (65KB, 517x768px) Image search: [Google]

65KB, 517x768px

>>37745624
how the fuck can they be so attached to someone that treats them like shit

>>37745970
>just the legs
>not calling her soggy bread

>>37745970
Yeah, during the physical test in the Army you have to run 2 miles. I ran like 13 min flat and she ran like 22 min. I passed her like 3 or 4 times.

>>37745985
ha, I forgot to mention that when we were making out the first time I was choking her and rubbing her clit really hard because she wouldn't let me pull her pants down. I would never meet her when she wanted to and almost always texted back an hour later. I heard that being a dick worked so that what I did. Although it was probably easier to be a dick to her because I knew she was a whore and wasn't really attracted to her anyway.

>>37744227
Navy has the most fatties, hams down

Holy Fuck. Words fail me. Great thread.

>>37744471
Its your turn to bend over OP

>>37744674

Ya know, from your description I was expecting a lot worse, but even with high standards I could fuck her if I was just trying to lose my virginity.

>>37743781
>disbitchiseazy.jpg
>blinderson.jpg
>jinglingknob.jpg
>notbuyingit.png

When saying "SOMETHINGSOMETHING.filextension", it's supposed to be a reference to a well-known image. A surrogate for actually posting it.

There is no such thing as a famous "jinglingknob.jpg".

Learn how to communicate right.

>>37746217
nah man, it can be used to effectively accentuate a specific notion or feeling.

>>37745624
She wasn't as bad as you said nigga (and you should appreciate her bitch). But damn, does it remind me of a chick name Romona that was fucking everybody at base years ago. Ayo, I don't watchu training for, but I am a diesel mechanic now in Texas earning $73k a year along with growing weed with family in SoCal for an additional $35k (not to mention $11k in DJing gigs). Good luck OP.
>you're still gonna need to develop (train) social skills in the courting/dating dept.
Ps. Ginger gal, if your reading this;
SORT YOURSELF OUT

>>37746195
I didn't think she was that bad while fucking her, but the problem was that she fucked like 5 black guys before fucking me. I think I was the first non-black to fuck her there.

>tfw the military just had a high profile case of servicemembers sharing each other's lewds on the internet
>OP fucked up and now this girl knows her shit is out there
>tfw OP is about to look back on those a15s like a golden age after the assfucking the green weenie is about to give him

>>37746187
Thanks Anon, all real shit here

>>37746346
She got kicked out of the army because she couldn't pass her pt test though.

File: 6yyuu7utggpl0.jpg (48KB, 484x700px) Image search: [Google]

48KB, 484x700px

>>37746373
Cheers mate! ['-']b

>>37744686
>>37744701
my dick is diamonds now. hot as fuck.

>>37746217
It was originally only for use like that but the meaning described in >>37746244 gets used a lot too and it's been that way for a while. I don't think it makes much sense but people do it anyways.

>>37746373
>implying that will matter

>>37746505
She'll also have to tell her parents which I don't think she'll do because that would be pretty embarrassing for her. Idk maybe she does maybe she doesn't. Either way she's still dumb for sending nudes over text. I mean I only sent her like 2 pics of me and neither were nude.

Op i was suicidally depressed all night til i saw this thred. Just sent alll the shit to yo gurr senpai

>>37744227
every branch has a lot of fat people trust me

File: smuganimegirl.jpg (44KB, 1026x567px) Image search: [Google]

44KB, 1026x567px

>>37744471
That's what you get for joining the army idiot, I bet they tricked you into the 6 year contract too lol

shoulda been an air force 4 year pop tart like me

>>37743837
>>Get article 15
>>counseling statement
>>14 days extra duty
>>months pay taken away
>>demoted from PV2 to PVT
How are they fucking your shit up that much because you were making out with the local whore?
I thought the military was supposed to be the peak of intelligence and aptitude.

>>37744471
now that you said this, my comment about the military being peak aptitude isn't nearly as entertaining

File: pepe.png (31KB, 128x128px) Image search: [Google]

31KB, 128x128px

>>37747342
>>I thought the military was supposed to be the peak of intelligence and aptitude.
That shit made me laugh, but it wasn't just that I was making out with the local whore. The sgt's were trying to kick her out and because we got caught fraternizing they had to give her an art15 which led to her staying in longer. This pissed them off and got me more punishment because they almost got rid of her but thanks to me she got to stay in longer.

>>37745098
it was nice of OP to keep mentioning how he messed up and didn't delete her number, or that polaroid, or the pics containing them

to really make sure that nobody noticed or did anything

>>37747182
Lol they only tricked me into a 5 year contract.

>>37747438
>but thanks to me she got to stay in longer.
kek ok nice OP

>>37744786
looks like a fucking man
small tits and a big gut
thats some terrible fat distribution

>>37744961
has the cottage beast responded?????????

File: laughing Nigel Farage.jpg (127KB, 960x633px) Image search: [Google]

127KB, 960x633px

>>37743886
>mark date in phone as "Lost virginity" April 13, 2017 at 9:30 pm
Kek

>>37744403
>your package was beaten with a sledgehammer
Absolute madman

>>37745624

>mark date in phone as "Lost virginity" April 13, 2017 at 9:30 pm

>she send this message April 6, 2017

You're full of shit, or you have your dates mixed up, or both

>>37745451
>>37747899
She just said "who are you". So she definitely knows

That's just gross dude. If a gal like her was my only hope of losing my virginity, I'd rather die a virgin.

Kek, the jig is up OP

She mad, no screencap because I don't want to get doxed myself. She's going to report you :^)