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I'm schizoid with ADD and two types of depression. I barely say anything at all and when I do I compress entire paragraphs into short sentences.
I haven't formed a meaningful relationship since I met my first and only enduring friend at my baptism when I was less than a year old. Now he's a smelly neet and literally cant make better friends or he'd drift away too. Even that is a shallow relationship, all we ever do is play vidya. we have a discord but we don't talk, just play.
Vidya gives me no pleasure any more. I have other hobbies but I'm not good at them; I like music but cant play. I like reading but don't have the attention span to read more than a few pages at a time. I like art but I've neglected the meagre skills I once had.
I used to over eat to compensate for not having real feelings which lead me to become a chef but then cooking became work and so did food. it all tastes the same when you know how the sausage is made.
sometimes girls seem attracted to me but then they get to know me and then they don't like me any more
yeah hkvmy posts don't even get (you)s so much that I sometimes wonder if been soft banned for bullying mods. I mostly lurk anyway. sometimes writing posts without posting them. these are things I should have told my psychologist but all I did say was "I'm fine". I don't see her anymore
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>>37693020
Major Depressive, sometimes psychotic, severe anxiety, probably AvPD as well. I think about suicide every day but I have more keeping me here now than I did 6 months ago so that's alright.
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>>37693020
I have BPD, PTSD and ADHD and I kind of relate to your feels, OP, even if it's not exactly the same. I can't form any meaningful relationships since I'm too broken. I only really have one friend and all my friendships kind of feel shallow. At best I can make good first impressions before it falls apart. I'm sick of things and just keep carrying on since I lack the willpower for suicide.
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>>37693020
imagine if you didn't have your chef skills
yeah that's me i don't have any skill i play videogames for playing.
Funny thing i think i can pretend to be a normie but i can't drink alcohol and most normies get angry at you or mock you for not drinking.
I also fucking hate when people talk about sex in public its so cringe for me
>Bro would you fuck that whore'
>If you don't answer you're gay
Fuck people im good like this
the rope seems more charming anyway
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>>37693356
I can drink like a fish. I'd do anything short of drilling a hole in my head to escape to a altered state of mind but I agree on the talking about sex part. fucking rude and gross. they're called private parts for a reason. irl I swear like a sailor and I love a dirty joke but I really don't want to hear "what you'd do to that girl" or how you got laid.
I once worked with a dude who had a threesome when he was 19 or something and he could not shut up about it. from the first day we worked together to the last, over and over and over again. when he was telling me the story it must have already been like 20 years since the actual events. fuck that dude. fat cunt said we couldn't play any music because he had a hangover but he was hungover every god damned day. I cant focus well in silence. so I would whistle and then I would sing. I could tell it really irked him but what the fuck could he do about it?
anyway it got me fired. good riddance I say
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