I'm planning my suicide and have 2000$ any suggestions

>>37688419
I'm in a similar situation. I have almost 30k saved up and my own apartment, and I will probably kill myself after July or somewhere around that time period

>>37688419
>>37685208

I made this thread earlier, has some good ideas. I really like my own, but of course, that is implied...

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>>37688419
>Learn how to play a trading card game (Big three being Yugioh, Pokemon, Magic the Gathering. Pokemon is the easiest to learn.)
>Build a meta deck
>Compete in local tournaments, and even travel out a bit with your new card store friends to regionals and nats
>Try not to kys
So far that has been working for me since 2012. I met a lot of new friends just this Sunday at a yugioh regional. I didn't do the greatest at this event, but hey, it was fun and something to do. Ate T.G.I.Friday's after with a few people and it was cool talking to new people. A lot of card game players are real robots too.

>>37688459
I know you'll want your possessions to go to your loved ones, but I'm gonna be homeless next month, could you spare a disabled robot 5k?

>>37688419
>>37688459
why don't you guys just drop everything and travel to another country for like 6 months, then if you still hate life, i would recommend kys because you're hopeless

>>37688419
DON'T DO IT ANONS PLEASE

>>37689694
>disabled

why can't you get housing assistance ?

>>37689733
I'm glad you didn't fall for that shit anon

>>37689733
I don't know how and I don't know if we have it here.
I just want to buy a used camper trailer so I can run away.
I'm being abused by my caretakers.

>>37688419
I think that you (or whoever who wants to suicide) should act alpha for once in your life. At the end of the day, you don't care about living anymore, so why don't you step it up and go outside to fuck some whores, get drunk and do other chad-related stuff? Maybe you finish becoming chad afterall and you won't need to suicide.
I think that suiciding straight away is a pretty retarded idea. Do extreme alpha shit, get laid, have a good time dude.
And if you really want to suicide even after doing all that stuff, just sign in for the army and protect your homeland

>>37689785
you are clueless to what leads people to this predicament.

2k? Literally fly somewhere you faggot. Then find a job and stay for a bit till you save enough to stay longer or fly somewhere else.

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Cocaine. Roughly $80 a gram. Is fucking awesome. Will also get you laid.

>>37689751
>I'm being abused by my caretakers.

there are literally like 10 tax funded agencies that will probably help you and give you money, the 1st being the police

>>37689888
>Will also get you laid.

checked but this is meme from movies and rap videos

>>37689821
well yeah, i mean i'd never kill myself, that sounds stupid. However I tried to think about his situation.
Let's see he might want to end his life for some random reason ie. he's hopeless about his life, never had gf, whatever.
IMO before even doing suicide, he should try to do all that stuff he could've never done in his life cuz he was scared or so. He has nothing to lose anyway and he might actually win.
And if even doing all that crazy shit he still wants to keep himself, at least he should do it in a useful way for other people (like fighting some terrorists or whatever), dont you think so?

>go to casino
>find roulette table
>keep betting on red until you either lose or you win enough to not want to kill yourself any more
If fate is on your side you could walk out of this with enough money to NEET it up for awhile. 4 wins in a row would turn your 2K into roughly 32K, though you would get taxed on that.

I mean if you wanna get rid of it... I'm here.

>>37689785
dumbest post i've read on here for awhile

>>37688459
I wont pretend like im dying and gonna get kicked out or anything but wanna buy me (a broke NEET) a ps4?

Ill pretend to be a girl in text chat if that'll cheer you up too

>>37688419
1.fly to a 3rd world country
2. Fuck the shit out of the savage girls inseminating them and creatinf an army of your children(just rap them)
3.work as a farmer for 18 years
4.in 18 years you have a fully functioning army
5.start a coup, taking th power and westernising the shithole you live in
6.become a hero of your nation and be remembered forever+every woman will want your child and you will get all the stuff for free
7.profit

>>37689864
That sounds fucking miserable, man.

OP a Mossberg 500 shotgun is only a couple hundred, slugs will run a few bucks more. Spend the rest on hookers n blow, then BLOW your brains out.

>>37689917
It's a meme because it works, lol.

>>37689919
I doubt a suicidal person living in their mom's basement who doesn't like to go outside would magically start doing alpha shit and getting laid and "fighting some terrorists".


I'm human garbage bruh. I'm a manlet, ugly, failed college. my whole life is a pos trying to be alpha and failing miserably.

I already knew it would be shit early in life. I have no future, I'm so fuckign miserable around people you have no idea, I'm beyond redemption.

>>37688419
Modern life is suicide we must retreat back into the forests and live a natural life, im so close to buying 150 acres and living simple off of welfare, if i was closer to my goal id offer you a spot too, infact if yiur willing to wait a bit before suicide offers open, you can kill yourself in the forests there too if you want and ill bury you.
Offer only stands if your white

>>37689945
definitely not dumber than someone who wants to kill himself cuz of some retarded reason brah

>>37690012
>Modern life is suicide we must retreat back into the forests and live a natural life
This
Not trying to sound "woke" but modern life is suicide. He's right

>>37690012
we already did this with the /k/ fortress fantasy.

a life of hunting and gathering would be pretty nifty if you had some books.

then again no girls to fuck sounds like suicide waiting to happen

>>37690021
whatever, reddit

don't reply to this

>>37690068
Ive got a autistic shy gf so ill have pussy there and were planning to have a large family in that forest, build a house there too with other anons/nazis

>>37688419
Dude, go to japan

>>37690068
>implying most arcanines havent gone 18+ years without fucking a girl

no biggy

>>37688459
Don't mean to be a cunt but can you fire me like 50 bucks on venmo?

>>37689992
how exactly when im an anxious piece of shit

>>37690096
yeah but then you'd just be the cult leader over the betas you sucked in

with all due respect fuck that

>>37690180
Well we are tribalist/nazi types so yea i will be the leader of the group, we hope to promote community values, permaculture and large families, me my gf, 6 other dudes and 2 single girls want in sofar, well see if they flake or not i know 2 of the dudes are down for sure

>>37688419
2k is peanuts desu

>>37689696
>suicidal
>motivation to completely restart life
holy shit man how is high school treating you

>>37690330
no shit you fucking genius

>>37690169
Cocaine makes you loquacious. Sure, you may still have anxiety but you'll talk your way out of it

Buy a weather balloon and tie yourself to it.

>>37690425
so I can see if the earth is flat?

>>37689821
I've felt close enough to suicide to sit by a bridge over train tracks contemplating jumping off for hours, held a knife to my neck, and refused to learn to drive for 12 years because the temptation to just slap on the gas and hit a wall whenever I was behind a wheel is too strong.

I still don't understand your deal. Many of the times I've felt I was about to do it pushed me to take further steps in life instead, in the what have I got to lose mindset other anons mention. This "suicide = apathetic depression" nonsense is bullshit, there's plenty of reasons someone might want to kill themselves. Pretending you have a monopoly on suicidal impulses just sounds like some normalfaggotry, "ohhh look at me my suffering is so deep and you can't understand me". Fuck off.

>>37688419
Give it to your mom

[ORIGINAL COMMENT]

>>37690644
She's gotten enough out of me

if dubs op does uprising before he offs himself, complete with a manifesto

>>37688419

>donate to charity

or

>use it to fund a overseas volunteering trip (indonesia is nice)

>>37692022
hmm.

I'll have to chew over these developments

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>>37692022

Normies and roasties about to get BTFO

>>37688419

i recommend you save a little more and go to vegas for drugs, strippers and gambling.

>Take out a huge line of credit spend it without the intention to pay it back.
Donate everything you got.

Go back to the bank and do heists till you get caught/shot. Might as well take shekelbergs money while you can and give to the poor, you'll go out as a hero anon.

>>37689642
I have that half mat kek

>>37688419
I would honestly take a large dose of mushrooms and see how you feel afterward. Around five grams should take you into a death simulation and then you can decide if you like being dead better than being alive. After all you have nothing to lose.

>>37688419
hey anon, remember to say hello to me when i finally cross over, whenever it is

>>37692303
Jumbled brain =/= death simulation

>>37692259

That would cause more hassle for the charities than it would for the banks.

>>37692329
what a profound post, really made me think

OP still has nothing to lose

>>37692303
I dont' really know anyone anymore so Idk where to get drugs, so that's ruled out.

>>37692555
what about dxm? you can get that over the counter and get similar results

>>37692555
You should read some of the experiences people have on dxm even if you decide not to do it. Seems pretty eye-opening with regards to the nature of reality and where you could "end up" after this life is over. I've never done it myself, but I've been considering it.

https://erowid.org/experiences/exp.php?ID=22811

>>37692555
skip about halfway through that one I posted to get to the good stuff, I forgot she talks about the issues she had with it at the beginning, eventually she gets into discussing the actual experience of a high-plateau trip and it's pretty fascinating

>>37689751
fuck off remshit

>>37692869
this page about dxm is depressing me on many personal levels it turns out.

>>37688419
DO DRUGS
DO DRUGS
DO DRUGS
DO DRUGS.
COCAINE, EXTASY, WEED YOU NAME IT.

>>37692869
my life has just been going downhill for decades, all the profound things and beautiful things eluded me. What kind of life is this?

I fell in love with a girl like this a long time ago and I've just dwelt on the past my whole life miserable things weren't different.

I hate myself and my mind. I'm pathetic just like she said.

a voice in the back of my mind, this repeating static, keeps wanting me to believe I'm evil.

>>37688419
1. Get drunk
2. Get your dick sucked
3. Eat pizza
4. Blow your brains out
2 and 3 order is optional.

>>37688419
>>37693736
>THIS
A whore is expensive as fuck and won't give you nearly as much pleasure as hard drugs.

>>37688459
The problem is that you don't feel useful. Tbh if I had lots of money I'd just use it to bring other robots up (and that's my plan). How you can do that is up to you.

>>37690337
whatever, worthless neet faggot, that's what i did when i was suicidal and got tired of being a loser. now i'm only suicidal when i'm in america

>>37690337
I wasn't suicidal or anything but I was a 20yo KHHV neet with no job experience and social anxiety and 6 months in Japan turned me in to a 21yo turbo normie who hits on girls in the street for fun and has a qt.314 photographer girlfriend who lets him stay for free.

>>37689989
kek
oiringigio

>>37694004
where do you live now?

origna

>>37693450
>>37693737
not my intention, sorry about that

>>37693781
Money doesn't mean anything though. I'm just going to buy a bunch of drugs or something then kill myself