ITT: Post yourself and your ideal gf/bf

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god dammit why won't anybody let me have sex with their vagina

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reeree rooroo dots on top

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tinned

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>>37674198
buy me please

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>>37674198
this picture does not do him justice
imagine the cutest boy in the world.

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who all robots should aspire to be

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>>37674662
>>37674659
>>37674641
>>37674590
>>37674482
>>37674261
>>37674218
>>37674198
like this..original post desu whatever

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>>37674198
boof boof

>>37674683
they'll die out like chart threads did,

>>37674707
they are so fucking gay..its a bunch of guys and guys LARPing as girls who make some gay stick figure holding crotch some sort of hip hopper from teh 90s

If you're going to make these threads, at least post the basic template everyone uses.

Bumping for template

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>>37674198
You have been muted for 2 seconds, because we do it for free.

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i like to keep my QTs absolutely halal, thank you very much

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>>37674873
>>37674934
No, I won't post a basic template for everyone to use.
Nothing you do will get it out of me.

>>37674590
I love her so much omg

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I think cows are cute.

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Anyone around 850
>>37674641
D-Discord?

>>37674198
what the hell is from

>>37674659
He's pretty hot tbqh anonolono

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If she breath she a thot

If she shoot she is not

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>Self post thread
I guess tallboi will have to wait for another day. I'm short, featherweight, and am usually super smooth about things but if I trip up my robotness breaks my facade and I become an awkward stuttering mess.

>>37676014
>Let's go out w people
Fucking normals, begone!

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>>37675856
this is him irl

>>37676014
anthony is dat y00 niqqa

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>tfw no loving avian gf

My dream is literally impossible

>>37676048
I do guess I have friends but only because I'm a manipulative pathological liar

>>37676078
Sorry senpai, no anthony here bb

>>37676125
completely fucked up the spoiler too >.<

>>37676125
>implying
I bet you're a fucking open book.
I want to fuck you, what do you think about that?

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shut in clingy skype bf

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I like to participate in these when I'm bored

>>37674662
>Chad
>voting for Sanders
Keep dreaming Stacey

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>tfw not enough of these so I can see what other robots are like

>>37676148
What? Why mad all of a sudden? Also I wouldn't want to fuck you I'm not a slut.

>>37676262
>why take antidepressants when you can take a walk?
>he takes my meds away
>i devolve into a frothing schizophrenic heap
>"just b urself"

miss me with that boy thanks

>>37676315
I don't know, I'm normally aggressive towards anyone on /r9k/.
Can't figure out why.

>>37676323
did you try taking a walk though

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>tfw no Bordigist gf

>>37676293
>mfw 2000% hot
Too much for me to handle

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>>37674198
u-um, well the girl im about to p-post is my dream girl, well, my ex, actually

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>>37676353
you're killing me dude

>>37676376
Wait, that was you and not a fantasy of yours? What?

>>37676387
I refuse to believe this is a real face that a person has.

>>37676402
Yeah that's me.
Not a fantasy.

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This was supposed to be a meme, but I would actually go for this.

Smart brunette with glasses? That's hot as hell, man.

>>37676460
Velma seems like one of the best nerd gfs desu

>>37676417
You'll make someone very happy in ways that most can't

>>37676534
Thank you for that, anon.
I appreciate it

>>37676616
which one is you. upload it again. I want to see if you'll make me happy. :3c

>>37676673
We were talking about >>37676293

>>37676293
awwww I'd date you!
sadly we probably don't live in the same country

>>37676766
What the fuck?
People actually like that?

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Guys like this turn me on.

>>37676817
Other than the description, the walking mannerisms seems to in line with my own.

>>37676766
How do you know you don't live in the same country?

>>37676817
>hair seems to overreact to wind
What is this about and how does one stop it?

>>37676898
everyone here is US and UK

>>37676932
I can see why you say that then.
I'm sure someone is like that near you, anon.

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You learn a lot when you distill yourself into material for a meme template.

>tfw she existed and now she's gone

>>37677293
Stoli sucks
Sobieski is better

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>tfw my ex was like this

>tfw STILL NO FUCKING GF

>>37677422
Holy shit idk where to find such a gf. Life is hell.

>>37677422
I passed up a girl like this, but she had bpd.

Then again, I'm sure I qualify as damaged goods myself.

>>37676337
You shouldnt then. Its rude for no reason

>>37677485
I found mine on tumblr. Relationship lasted a fair bit, It's been more than a year now, there's still a huge hole inside of me. Oh well.

>inb4

>>37676262
oh my goodness you're perfect please marry me

>>37677857
Dude, if you ever fall into a depression or something he'll ditch you because he thinks you brought it on yourself by not eating enough tree bark.

>>37674969
This is making me feel things
Oregano

>>37678332
that's the point my friend
oreragnaros

>>37675647

why are you concerned over your race it sounds like it's the only semblance of identity you have, from what you're saying in this picture you're about as empty and deplorable as any normie.

>>37677857
Idk bout that but we could maybe go to coffee or something first
>>37678003
Did I hurt you anon?

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I woke up this morning and decided to be a giant fucking tumor

>>37678540
You're the human version of the "THIS IS A LIFELONG ADDICTION" picture.
You actually sound like my boyfriend who abuses the shit out of me, so you did nothing but by proxy you upset me.

>>37678618
90% cute, 10% do not tell me what to eat

>>37678729
I've never abused anyone in my life. You shouldn't tolerate him if he abuses you, that's not worth any good you may glean from his personality.

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>>37678777
If I leave I'll be completely homeless. I have a dog whom depends on me. I also can't leave because I haven't got the means. No car, no money.
It's not really as easy as just walking away when it gets too bad. That's something people who never had to deal with abuse seem to find hard to understand, but I guess it's like a well off person telling a poor person to stop being poor.

>>37677656
>tumblr
Interdasting

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Something

Originality desu

>>37679114
sounds like me sans interrupting skinheads.

>>37679120
What did you change, anon?

>>37679130
I forgot the title part, anon.
I didn't realize it but I posted the wrong version.

>>37679130
he wrote qt nightrose gf

>>37679120
Thats cool, did you make it?

>>37679167
No, my boyfriend did. I'm autistically bad at art otherwise.

>>37679114
>let's make pipe bombs and disrupt a skinhead rally
>Wanna go to this reenactment with me?

I can't tell which one screams "LARPER" more.

>>37679234
>famalam
Leave

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There, I changed it since you guys didn't like it, geez

>>37679360
Try tumblr you fucking commie piece of shit.
Kill yourself

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posting my ideal BF from last thread.
am a male myself though.

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>>37679392
Quit being buttmad that someone thinks differently than you :^)

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going to post myself. i have commitment issues i need to get the fuck over.

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No bullying please.

This comment was not original

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Hey guys it's me again... How is everybody?

>>37679559
I'm doing pretty good. How about you?

>>37679594
I'm pretty fine anon, just feeling a bit down tonight.

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Still holding out hope I'll find her

>>37679600
Oh yeah? Why's that?

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honestly, nothing would be better to me than this.

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if you exist in EUROPE please be mine forever

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>>37679621
I just do. It's like one of those nights when you just feel sad and a little bit depressed and even so when you have no reason you just feel down. It isn't like really bad but it gets really annoying when it happends often, like I'm not sure about you but I kinda dislike being sad. I'm really starting to hate all of this memes and normies trying to get attention out of it because when you actually deal with it, is not enjoyable or something to be proud at all.

Also to be honest the whole issue of normies raiding is pretty annoying, I don't wanna sound like a grumpy old fag but all of these kids are starting to get extremely annoying as every single wave of summerfags are becoming worse and more autistic, I really kinda don't enjoy /r9k/ as much as I did before and believe me, this was almost my favorite and only board. I don't know guys, sorry for venting and such but things are hitting me hard today :/

>>37679612
that's impure and lewd anon

>>37679500
You were posting about committing acts of terrorism with explosives.
You cant use that rhetoric when you're openly a wannabe terrorist

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this is me. most people don't like traps on here but i thought i'd finally put myself out there.

>>37679695
I want it so bad anon

>>37679701
Skinheads literally seek out people and assault them because of their race or sexual orientation. It's morally justifiable to attack skinheads in any case.

>>37679723
how do you know you will want it? what if you get into it and realize it's gross

t. someone that thought they loved chastity but just liked being given tons of attention instead

>>37679705
I dont want to choke anyone.

>>37679727
You say, as you seek out to murder people.
Skinheads stick to their own and theres reallynnot many of them.
You deserve to hang before you hurt anyone

>>37679705
That kind of reminds me of Sheila from shameless because it looks like an innocent lady but then you see the "choke me" parts of her. But she is actually a she in the show.

>>37679743
>skinheads
>people
That's really stretching it anon

>>37679705
Pretty cute desu

origami

>>37679694
Oh definitely, I know how you feel.
I really enjoy talking and listening to people but sometimes I get one of those days where I just can't stand talking to a single soul. Summerfags and a shit ton of normies are starting to worse and worse by the passing hour. Its pretty insane honestly. I might just move to /x/ since I'm really into that but never actually went there.
Its all good, anon. People just need to vent

>>37679754
Maybe theres a reason youre so desperate and alone.
Youre a hate filled person. You deserve nothing but the worst in life.

>>37679705
you seem perfect to me

i had an ex that was like you except it seems you're better based on this pic

>>37679728
>how do you know you will want it? what if you get into it and realize it's gross
I won't know for sure until I try it but it's the only thing that I find arousing. I doubt I'll ever find anyone into it though so we'll never know.

>>37679730
i mean... that's obviously good, but i like the feeling :s
>>37679766
thanks, was pretty much expecting someone to tell me to go back to /lgbt/
>>37679776
i think perfect is a bit of a stretch, i'm pretty flawed since i'm such an emotional mess. and sorry to hear about your ex. hope you're doing okay now!

>>37679774
S a y s t h e N a z i
or worse, a liberal

>>37679820
yeah perfect is a stretch no one is perfect but thanks i wanna post about it but i fear she might she it and i dont want her to feel guilty

she's trans and cheated on me the day after i told my mom about her and has a lot of problems but i wanted to help her with them yeah im not gonna blog anymore i look like a normie (i'm not)

>>37679831
I'm a spic and not a liberal.
Nice try, you're just an awful person.

>>37679865
Please, reveal your clearly superior ideology to me :^)

>>37679891
I'm just pointing out that youre a fucking sociopath. Even your precious pet minorities hate you.

>>37679839
okay regardless of whatever problems she had cheating on you makes her scum so it was right for that relationship to end!
now i just want to hug you, since i feel bad i reminded you of her.

>>37679820
>was pretty much expecting someone to tell me to go back to /lgbt/

Not super likely. Most of us here would fuck your throat given the chance with all the trapposting that goes on but your expectations have basis

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I want somebody that needs protection to protect.
I could make a tinder and get 200 matches in 24 hours, but none of them need protection. They dont want to devote themselves to somebody. They just want sex.
So i guess my ideal gf/bf/whatever would be somebody that i enjoy talking to and being around, and is dependent on me and what i can offer to them.
Its just a shame that nobody is trying to kill me right now. Its so boring and im so lonely.
And no amount of vagina could fix that, i need another soul inside mine.

>>37679911
no no it's not like that it's just that you're cute and reminded me of her and you are trans as well don't feel bad! thank you for wanting to hug me :>

>>37679705
Be my fucktoy and punching bag gf
Where do you live.

>>37679906
>precious pet minorities
Race means nothing, it divides the working class. All of the liberal "leftists" make everything a race isues because they're bourgeois puppets who want to suppress the proletariat.

>>37679915
fucking my throat is good!
wh-what about my boipussy?
>>37679924
okay. i hope you're having a wonderful night/day anon!
>>37679940
ahn~
and im in new zealand

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>>37674687
my ideal goodboy

>>37679916
Iktf anon. It's a horribly painful feeling. Don't rely on tinder and other online dating crap to find your soulmate though. Pretty much everyone on them is looking for a 7/10+ lay, not a commitment

>>37679976
thank you

tfw have a chastity cage and she couldn't get it on because her balls are so tiny from hrt

>>37679971
Thats an awful long way to say "I dont want to work"
And you obviously do care about minorities more since you want to commit acts of terrorism against people who just dont like them

>>37679993
Obviously, but how the hell do you find a soulmate if youre antisocial?
I mean, i have friends, but we just do whatever we set out to do. If girls are around i talk to them but ive never met one i would consider dating.
There was one girl that would sit next to me and read on break at my old job.
I saw her reading Dostoyevsky and kinda developed a crush on her.
And we rarely talked, even though we spent most breaks together.
But thats it

>>37680014
*I want the full value of my work, instead of barely enough to keep myself alive
I also don't want to starve on the streets because Porky found more readily available exploitees

>>37679916
iktf, i dont even want sex that much

>>37680014
It's not that they don't like them, it's that they regularly assault and murder them for no reason other than how they were born.

>>37680028
Working at a dollar store isnt a career.
It's hard to starve when your parents support you.
Not every job is one you can live off of. You're less qualified than a teenager, why should you be payed more?

>>37679976
What the fuck New Zealand... Godamnit why aren't any of you in Europe.
>tfw no trap gf to completely molest and beat up and rape

>>37680045
Sounds like a better description of muslims and black people than of skinheads. I know skinheads, I'm a spic and they dont give a shit.

>>37680050
You couldn't project any harder if I stuck a flashlight up your ass.

>>37680060
All commies are the same.
You're a lazy fuckwit who wants more than you deserve. Instead of working, you cry and demand other peoples money,

>>37679976
Your boipussy will be pounded, don't you worry

>>37679976
>tfw nz
>tfw don't want trap
dammit

>>37680058
What the fuck makes you think I like muslims or any religion in general?

>>37680072
Because you'd rather attack the relatively benign skinheads than the actual hatemongers and murderers.

>>37680064
Yeah, fuck me for thinking that human lives are more important than money.

>>37680091
You dont give a damn about other people.
You're advocating parasitizing them just so you don't have to get a real job.

>>37674218
Top tier. Contact?

>>37675141
Fuck off mudslime

Origi

>>37680108
The bourgeoisie deserve to have their money and property taken from them because it wasn't their labor that earned it.

>>37680052
i used to live in europe, i was born in britain haha. might move back there someday.
>>37680069
there are actually other kiwis on this board holy shit. what do you want, anon?
>>37680066
good

>>37680141
You didn't earn it either.
The only thing you are is an edgy kid you daydreams about murdering people and not working.
Killing people isn't a job and you can't claim to care about other people in one breath and talk about making bombs and committing mass murder in another.

>didn't reply to me
kmsing

>>37680168
Who are you?
Gggghhhhggghhtt

>>37680164
All of this arguing could be avoided if you just overlooked my post. I came here to get my boypussy stuffed, not debate with the politically illiterate.

>>37679997
hahaha sucks to be her cages are so hot!

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Still no tuborg

>>37680148
Move to Europe and be my rapeslave.

>>37680191
Says the politically illiterate child.
You're a fucking hypocrite and you do nothing but tell lies to further your agenda. You're a horrible person, that's why you're alone. No amount of spamming your trash will fix that.

>>37680186
the chastity post but i think you replied to it

>>37679360
But are you even c u t e ?
Also pipe bombs are shit.
Let me know when you wanna play with the big dogs, ill rent a truck and buy some racecar fuel/farming supplies.

>>37680228
Nice roleplay faggot.
You'd have ask your dad for the money and he'd probably say no since he actually worked for it.

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here i am

original

>>37680227
Idk what you're talking about bud
Link it >>37680236
>>37680227

>>37680246
You're perfect.
Shame you're either not real or not near me.

>>37680255
im confused lol i jokingly said i was kmsing because you replied to all the other posts and not mine, it really doesn't matter

>>37680255
I'm not at all surprised the lazy commie is a tranny chaser.

>>37680246
First
You may not know it because theres an internet between us, but im insanely attractive snd can run really, really, really fast

>>37680262
Fuck are you talking about, I haven't said shit to any tranny on this thread

>>37680255
did you accidentally quote two chastity related posts

>>37680287
Idk what the hell all this chastity talk is.
You said nobody replied to your post, so i replied in order to find which post it was, so i can reply to it.
But im on mobile and accidentally linked 2 random posts, i think.

>>37680265
>>37680259
Luck of the draw
At high noon, the roast clangs and out come the guns

>>37680164
Daily reminder that there is absolutely nothing wrong with bashing the fash.

>>37680310
yeah you replied to me when i was talking to the transgirl and had nothing to do with the conversation so i think there is a misunderstanding going on

>>37680334
I own a taser. I'd tase a guy to take her out for coffee.

>>37680341
Then you go and cry to the cops when those regular people you've deemed fascists for not being batshit insane kick your ass or find your real identity.

>>37680148
>there are actually other kiwis on this board holy shit. what do you want, anon?
>>37679612
so I guess we're all fucked up in our own ways

>>37680348
I own a dick
I would put it in your ass to put in in your ass.
The girl can watch but if she needs to be quiet and hold applause till the finale
Also i own like 6 guns lol
Fucking love these united states.

>>37680377
Thats how you seduce a woman. You rape a guy, make her watch, and then commit murder.

>>37680356
>regular people you've deemed fascists
Yeah, anon, keep listening to liberal media. Good boy.

>>37680356
My god, how many layers of bootlicking are you on?

>>37680361
you just quoted me and said nothing wut

>>37680387
Yes
Theyre really into it
Wait till i get to the Nazi shit and arson, that really gets the juices flowing.

>>37680259
no i'm real lol
>>37680265
i can't run fast (small legs) but i'd love to go on a walk
>>37680348
i'd love to go have a coffee
>>37680377
>>37680387
lol

>>37680405
I linked what I want anon

>>37680391
You mean the only people actually covering up your ilks crimes?

>>37680399
Just because someone doesn't want to support parasites like you doesnt make them a bootlicker. It just means you're worthless.
If you want venezuela so badly, go there. Don't bring it here.

>>37680422
oh lol fuck im dumb.

>>37680415
>i'd love to go have a coffee
Where are you from?

>>37680415
Wow, a real girl on the internet
If you excuse me mlady, i have a display for you.
But srs kill self mail me the result

>>37680433
>You mean the only people actually covering up your ilks crimes?
Kek. You have no idea what you're talking about, anon, you know that?

>>37680444
If the media was actually against you your kind would all be in prison or mental institutions.
You think anything other than 100% support is opposition because you're a spoiled child

>>37680440
too far probably, washington
>>37680442
what? lol

>>37674218
What is it supposed to be? The Hunchback?

>>37680494
Washington state or DC?

>>37680465
>If the media was actually against you your kind would all be in prison or mental institutions.
Yes, because media is totally what determines whether you'll be put in prison or not. You're retarded, shut the fuck up.
Media is full of liberal pussies who can't comprehend that sometimes you have to use violence to prevent more violence, and that's a fact.

>>37680494
What im saying is,
Basically
You should seriously consider no longer being alive as an alternative to being alive.

>>37680505
the state
oregano

>>37680341
>All Fascists are Nazis
>Fascism and Nationalism are the same
>Anyone to the left of me is a Fascist
>Antifa did a good thing by preventing center-right people from speaking and being questioned by the obviously more informed and intelligent left-leaning students
>b-buh-but it wasn't REAL communism!!!

Saved you the trouble.
Why do people even have meme philosophies?
Honestly.

>>37680512
i'll consider it thanks

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i was bored and couldn't sleep so here i am

>>37680526
No problem.
Its what im here for.
Need anything else?

>>37680514
Well shoot.
I actually live really close to DC.

I'll mail you the coffee.

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>>37680527
here's the other one for kicks

>>37680521
>1917+100
>Thinking that spineless college liberals represent any majority of leftists at all
>not recognizing the difference between state capitalism, socialism, and full communism
ISHYGDDT

>>37680533
how do i tie a noose?
>>37680546
well heck. but thanks i still love coffee

>>37680562
>Thinking that spineless college liberals represent any majority of leftists at all
They're pretty much all of them. There's not many other demographics sheltered enough to buy into that garbage.

Is there a template for these qts?

>>37680569
Dont use a noose
The best way is bleeding to death at the base of a tree.
You can do drugs to make it less painful.
But just 5 quick cuts with a razor, then relax for a few hours and let yourself drain out.

>>37680572
"In every American community there are varying shades of political opinion. One of the shadiest of these is the liberals. An outspoken group on many subjects, ten degrees to the left of center in good times, ten degrees to the right of center if it affects them personally." -Phil Ochs

>>37680597
It's a retarded quote.
Just because someone said it doesn't make it true.

>>37680586
right here my dude >>37675268
>>37680588
thanks for the advice

>>37680569
Now I'm all sad you're in the wrong washington.
You seem perfect.

>>37680614
If you can walk 3+ hours per day.
Post discord/skype.
If not
Fuck off

>>37680607
Except it has been proven several times over to be true. Like during the Spanish Civil War, most Liberals supported Franco and his Fascist goons, while only the furthest left of them gave any support to the Republican side.

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whew this was fun

my crush in this thread is >>37680199 because she is a tru viking!

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i had fun making this

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>>37680622
probably not every day unfortunately
>>37680617
truly a shame, i would probably be too shy to meet up if i'm entirely honest

>>37680653
> tfw this is basically me

>>37680653
I want a person who will listen as i play nmh all day on a shitty untuned guitar
But then
>dark souls
$5 says you're a trap

>>37680660
Weakling
I need to be walked like a dog, 2-5x/ day.
If i dont i get my walks in i cant sleep or relax.

>>37680666
>$5 says you're a trap

wrong

>>37680562
I'm making a mocking point about leftists who spout "bash the fash" without realizing that some values don't need to be seasonal. Free speech is one of them.

You're just spouting nonsequiturs. I'm not even the guy who's been arguing with you.

>>37680695
Well then what are you?

>>37680680
yeah i'm far too laid back for so much exercise, i spend most of my time sitting

>>37680713
Of course I believe in free speach. You can say whatever bullshit you want but that doesn't mean people have to listen to it.

>>37680246
> tfw would have a bug buddy girl
> could go on adventure hikes through the woods, explore them and collect all sorts of plants and insects together
> watch a movie later in the night while cuddling and eating snacks. Talking about our day
> holding each other and listening to each other
> looking at cute images online of doggos and memes.

It's a fucking shame you're from the US. This kinda hurts me.

>>37680729
There was a point in time where people chased animals until the animals gave up and collapsed from exhaustion.

>>37680715
a comfy homebody sweetheart BOYfriend/man

>tfw i'd sing along to your shitty untuned guitar with my shitty untrained voice

>>37680607
Saying that you support civil liberties, and also saying that you condone violence based on someone's beliefs makes this demonstrably true.

>>37680741
There was a time where people generally died before reaching the age of 30. What's your point?

>>37680730
>when you accidentally meme halfway
Meant to say either "free speech" or "MUH FREEZE PEACH"

>>37680757
>yeah, lets wait for the extreme right to rise and not do anything about it, because violence is bad and violates muh free speech
You Americans are gonna get fucked.

>>37680765
Well, that factors in infant mortality.
In the ancient world people usually died as a baby, or at 60-80
My point is, walking yourself will make you better behaved and more focused, guaranteed.

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Wow, life is so fun im so happy wow this is great i hope i never die wow

>>37680735
where ya from??
>>37680741
there was indeed a time, but it's 2017 and we can grow meat in petri dishes now

>>37680837
Yeah but killing animals is fun though

>>37680837
Eastern Europe. Basically other side of the world.

I also have a gf that could spend her days walking around the city collecting bugs that fell into water fountains, nurse them back to health and then release them to fly away. Can also spend her time lost in the woods and sleeping on the grass. You sound like you'd be an amazing friend for both of us and would be a fun person to hang out with, since generally we have a very hard time talking with others, but you have nice interests.

>>37680871
>nursing bugs back to health
Ty anyo blyet

>>37680871
so far away! i actually have a bf who unfortunately isnt too interested in bugs but i would love to be friends?? i dont have anyone to talk about bugs with, you guys sound cool
>>37680870
no it isnt you psycho

>>37680925
But it literally is
Dont knock it till you try it
Also roastie normie ---out--- of my pure clean r9k

>>37680940
i am no roastie!

>>37680965
You have a bf and you post on r9k
That makes you a roastie
That's just the way it works.

>>37680925
Yeah it's too bad.
I like bugs simply because she does and I find it interesting how they move and behave, but i'm generally uneasy by wormy ones. She likes all of them.
I'm just afraid that she could fall in love with you since you're basically the type of girlfriend she's looking for so far from what you've said. Me and your bf would end up being dumped by both of you so you could be together and live in the woods or something heh.

>>37680629

>do you ever wonder you're secretly retarded and everyone's too polite to tell you?

YES!

>>37681006
oh lol, i understand what you mean man

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I'm too lazy to make my ideal gf right now so have me and a template.

>>37681111
Oh and check em

>>37674766
They are RPing

LARPing would be in the real world, dickhead.
It isn't LIVE ACTION! role play for no reason.

>>37674198
Hey, what is that? Is that old English? Is that what it's called? I'd actually like to write an old friend a letter like that. Can anyone help me with the name?

>>37675731
bloodboring.

>>37681402
Still considered to be within the category of modern English. Though. I would recommend Elizabethan Drama/Poetry, and Victorian novels, if you're looking to glean texts for style.

Old English looks like a foreign language to most native speakers. (Though, probably not so much for the Brits).

>>37676523
i had a crush on a little jewish girl who was velma incarnate.

>>37681402, this is >>37681460
Worth saying that Civil War letters also have a strangely erudite and graceful language to them.

Also that pretty much any text from 1820 to 1920 will give you what you'd want.

>>37678618
>dont pat my head
>pat my head
>grill confirmed.

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I'm a disaster

oregano

>>37681555
Is this you or just your ideal gf? Would love to have some banter with a qt. I miss going back and forth and jabbing at each other with a female friend months ago, then going suddenly into cute lovey dovey stuff, with some mild namecalling inbetween those.

I miss you, dweebo

>>37677422
>*twee in the streets, lewd in the sheets*
Yes please!

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>>37681438
NEVER EVER PKEKS

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>>37681555
I hope that bit at the bottom right is a joke

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I could make one of myself but then I remembered that love is a spook and I'll be fine without a gf as long as I can get myself an isolated cabin somewhere so I don't have to deal with people.

>>37674198
does anyone have shy gf?

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>>37681636
this one?

original spaghetti

>>37681694
bretty good too but this isn't the one... It's just titled shy gf

>>37679705
>genji main

sluts should play mercy

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>>37681712
Is this her? if not i give up good luck on your search

>>37679705
fucking genji mains

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>>37681739
YES thanks anon :^)

oregano

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Idk what i want in a guy I guess just an understanding supportive weeb

>>37676358
hope you enjoy helicopter rides

origi

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Patrician gf incoming

>>37681767
So are you gay, or just posting bait?

>>37681789
I'm this crazy person -> >>37681555

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>>37681811
Nice dubs now be my bully gf I'm a generic weeb beta like the rest of this entire site.

>>37681555
where are you from

nice digits

>>37681834
oki-doki *bullies you into submission*

>>37681849
California

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>>37681933
>*bullies you into submission*
Are there headpats after though? That's the most important part of good bullying

>tfw australia so never near anyone

>>37681933
shame
no one seems to be from eu on here

>>37681555
>>37681767
Im no weeb but you should totally give contact so we can be bant couple

>>37681933
>California

661?

>>37681962
If you ever do find someone from the EU, they're always unreachable in one way or another.

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I was going to do one of myself but what's the point when my ideal gf doesn't exist

>>37680782
>yeah, let's start political violence with a group which has lots of guns and members in the military/law enforcement, that should end well
also, look into the actual history of Weimar Germany. without communist agitators, the Nazi party couldn't have risen like it did

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>>37681959
of course, it's essential!

>>37681980
really close! 626

>>37681976
I have a kik if interested

>>37681981
pretty much! but you never know

>>37674218
Thats the most accurate depiction of R9K I've ever seen.

...or atleast me...

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>>37682064
>but you never know
But anon, I do. If you ever find the unicorn you won't get near her. The only benefit to coming here is finding out that it isn't a sausage fest as far as contacting them goes.

>>37682062
yes very interested, my kik is great_wall_of_trump

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>>37682062
>tfw no smug bully gf
>tfw not even sure if I really want a gf or just enough validation to prop up my ego since I hate being around people

>>37677422
My ex aswell. W h e w

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let's try again aa
>tfw no qt shy gf

>>37682196
I know a femanon just like this anon.... it's too bad she's hundreds of miles away from me...

>>37676358
>Can I use your apartment
it belongs to the workers, bitch

>>37682221
w-where

oregano

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>>37682129
sent you a message

>>37682135
you'll get that smug bully bf one day and if not thats fine too cuz if you hate being around ppl why even care about what they think. plus if you had a bully gf she'd wipe away what was left of your ego anyway

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Us on the left. Generally her stuff are on the right and mine are on the left, but the closer you get to the middle, the more in common it is between us. Potential gf for the both of us on the right

tfw jumping between being lovey dovey/cute and being smug and bullying each other

>>37682317
*her stuff is on the left, mine are on the right fug

>>37682317
>gf for us borth
Fuck off chad you already have a gf you don't need 2 REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>37682317
> tfw want this
> have huge mental issues
> if someone in a relationship bullied me even slightly id break down crying
> tried gamedev but was too stupid and unmotivated to do it
> have nothing to offer at all

I didnt expect to become upset from this thread and to see my dream

>>37676262
>im not gonna spree shoot, guns are just cool

Finally, somebody else on /r9k/ understands

>>37682245
Mexico :<

oregano

>>37682317
Do you have any contacts?
pls be from the US. Is mtf okay?

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I made a smol Alice. Give me ideas on what to write.

>>37682458
damn rip
originalo

>>37682394
Well I tend to enjoy bullying as does she to a smaller degree. But it's not like we'd attack you for no reason. It's just friendly banter.

> tried gamedev but was too stupid and unmotivated to do it
> have nothing to offer at all
offering your love and accepting ours is plenty. Other things are just acquired interests over time

>>37682466
Not from the US. EU. So it wouldn't really work out it seems.
mtf is fine as long as you enjoy wearing cute girly dresses and sundresses while going out

>>37681555
Oh fuck, you sound lovely. I hope I can get a gf like you someday.

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>>37682196
>we can only vc but only if you feel comfortable
dawwwww

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I just want a gf to bioCLANG in bed with.

>>37679392
>commie
Mate i'm as right wing as they get and I still like shooing 7.62x54r

Mosins are fun, even though they're commie

>>37682530
>bioCLANG
You want to fuck her then accidentally slip out and jam it in her urethra so you have to take a trip to the hospital when you bust her open like a hull breech?

>>37682394
don't be upset anon-chan, plenty of people have the idea that dont have something to offer when thats just not so. for some it doesnt take more than a listening ear or just someone to take to, and/or have same views/interests. the only thing a relationship demands is staying dedicated to your partner in some form. ex staying supportive, being kind, ect

also its not surprising if you'd be upset if a someone you cared about bullied you and hurt your feelings. don't overthink in the negativity. playful banter is common in relationships and you will one day experience it too just be optimistic

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>tfw no gf to call me salty sea bass

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>>37676014
Aaand fuck it pls be my ai bf

>>37682509
That does sound very nice!..
> EU
> Im in australia

And back to wanting to kill myself. I hope you find someone. Chatting would be fun but I couldnt do even half of the things when theres distance and we cant meet.

>>37682511
thank you! I hope you find her soon!

Origami

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>>37674198
This whole thread is retardation

>>37674198
I didn't know the doll had cracks in her face and I have 100 hours in the game what

>>37682661
specially when we outnumber femanos 10 to 1
just more ego stroking for this hoes that think they are special.

>>37682661
aren't they all though?


Origi pastrami

>>37682646
I'm sorry to hear that. We'd still like to talk if you wanted to, but yeah the distance is just horrible. If you still feel like talking, you can drop off your discord at [email protected]

Otherwise don't give up. I'm sure there are things you could offer for someone. And as >>37682574 said, being kind, affectionate etc. is usually more than enough for the start. Interests can change over time and quite quickly actually.

>>37682565
Yes, then she can get a cybernetic urethra to replace her weak and inferior flesh so we can slowly become full cyborgs that have sex by connecting our brains via wire and entering a simulation where any fetish is possible.

>>37682750
>and entering a simulation where any fetish is possible.
Why fuck in your mind-sim when you could play engineering games instead though?

>>37682019
Top fucking taste anon
>tfw no qt will ever hold you down and cut your throat

>>37682796
Of course our fetish would be playing engineering games together.

>>37682815
Ah, off course.
You better not be the kind of degenerate that build ships just so they clang though!

>>37682733
Well your image is basically exactly what id want from a relationship. I always wanted to have a bf and gf. Its one of those dreams I keep deep down and never tell anyone and there would be no point in me wasting your time with me, when you can probably find someone better closer to you since I wouldnt be able to leave. Im sorry for wasting your time.

>>37682862
>I always wanted to have a bf and gf.
Translation: I've always wanted to be part of Chad's harem

Fuck off you normie whore.

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>>37682849
I only clang sometimes.

>>37677422
she isn't real
I can't make her real

orignasl

>>37682862
Well again, sorry that we can't offer more. The throwaway is still there if you want to play games, chat etc. Sadly we wont be moving to Australia either.

>>37676921
cut your hair short, leave the top medium but sides and the back real short. try to style the top hair a bit after shower like those stupid chads do.
bowlcut autism tier hair tend to do that very often, it looks stupid.

> tfw not a single girl in the thread
> its only people larping

>>37683235
plot twist: you are the only girl

>>37681744
>>37681714
i need emotional healing.

>>37683255
If fucking only. I wouldnt be alone then and I wouldnt be here.

>>37683361
well it could be worse
you could be a hanzo main

>>37683361
> tfw I need emotional healing right now

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me. ready to kms

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>>37683849
>tfw need sexual healing right now

>>37683881
> tfw this unironically used to be >>37682317 my gf here for the first 2-3 years of our relationship except for a few details

that's spooky
I kinda miss her jumping between loving me, hugging me and then hating me for no reason

>>37676268
Chad will vote for whatever gets him laid.