Psychological Issues #71

no i cant be bothered

>>37558329
I've had really bad anger for a while now, to a point where I feel like I need to just go somewhere and scream, but can't cuz don't want to get in trouble.
Also any "friends" I've had have pretty much abandoned me, and those that still talk to me only do so when they have nothing else. Otherwise they just ignore my texts until they have absolutely nothing else to do. It hurts and makes me more angry. I don't know whta to do. Everything feels hopeless.

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>>37558329
Doc, how do you feel about those you deem unsalvagable? Do you pity them?

>>37558380
Feel ya man, everything is hopeless, unless of course you try tricking yourself into believing it isn't (hence "normal" people)

>>37558380

What causes your anger?

>>37558437

The only ones I know who are unsalvageable are those who choose to be this way.

In that sense, I don't pity them.

>>37558553
Oi, you sound like you're preaching - as in: "There is hope for everyone who believes in it"
Making it sound easy, of course it helps to believe in it, however it's another thing to actually persuade yourself into believing in something irational and so out of reach

>>37558603
>Oi, you sound like you're preaching - as in: "There is hope for everyone who believes in it"

You don't even have to believe in it. When I started therapy, my first words to the therapist were: "I come to you with very little hope and not much trust."

No faith required if you do the steps.

And it's not easy, whether you believe in it or not. I don't mean to generalise, however. Problems vary a lot.

We'd need to define what we mean by unsavable people.

>>37558648
Ye tried looking for a therapist, called three different shifts and noone can take me in until August or so. Can't kill myself though, too much people depend on me, so the fact that I'm drowning in my own thoughts is meaningless. Penitentiary I guess.

>>37558725

Nobody until August? That's fucking insane.

I'll do what I can. Make a list of symptoms, long as required but short entries.

Hey everyone, hey Nick.

Shitty as always? Sure is with me

>>37558870
>Shitty as always?

No. I seem to have come back from the world of the dead to some degree. It had been six months, so that's weird.

>>37558887
Well thats good, isnt it?

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>>37558895

Yes. I won't say much more about myself here. I'll keep it focused on the new people.

>>37558815
I was here before, I used the name Kole, a lot has happened since, uhm well if you remember it was primarily (there were other things) about that girl (not love, just friends) to whom I talked to a lot, felt true empathy, and after we finally "go out" she just turns completely cold. I ask multiple times why, she gives strange and untruthful excuses, she stops talking after a while (loooooong story short) It gotten to the point where I was extremely *insert word*. I sent her a message again recently, she started apologising for everything, started saying how I'm wonderfull and how everybody should.have someone like me in their lives.. Then starts answering less and less again (same thing as before, showing signs she doesn't care). I confront her again, she says that she is going through some stuff (her friend's dad died suddenly, she herself has problems with uni). I said okay, I'm here if you want someone to talk to.
It's like I'm on "stand by". When I mentioned that I was going through a lot (also a long story) at the same time when she stopped talking to me, she didn't even bother to ask how I was..
And besides, if you're going through stuff, shouldn't you then want to talk to your true friends, people who you think high of?
I can't understand if she cares..

>>37558971

First impression is that she's seeing someone else but is unsure whether that will be fruitful; so, in doubt, she wants to keep you in the wings, just in case.

Best thing you can do is take good note of her behaviour and wait without any hope. Move on, even.

See what happens. It could also be that she doesn't want to say anything hurtful to you.

You can also confront her with direct questions, which she may use as an excuse to then burn bridges.

>>37559011
The thing is, after that first expression, she said a lot of things - including "I'm sorry the last thing I wanted to do is to let you think that I don't need you in my life". She also used a lot of self-deprecation. She says that when she talks to me she feels shallow, as if she doesn't deserve a person like me in her life.
So my primary thought was, okay she doesn't care, she is saying this because she doesn't want to hurt me. As if her plan was to make me feel more self confident about myself but still try to leave me be.
It's confusing. She keeps sending me messages. The last thing I said was that if she really wants to talk that she can send me a message on whatsapp, she sent it immediately and she said (look above - the things she's going through etc).

So I am really confused. I'm not in love with her, I just really care about her and can't leave her because I bellieve she really needs someone to talk to.

>>37559011
>>37559200
Impression*
And also. don't know if you remember, but me and her, we talked a lot. Both she and I opened up a lot, and both of us admitted that it was scary to talk to someone in that way.

>>37559200
>"I'm sorry the last thing I wanted to do is to let you think that I don't need you in my life".

It's still a thing she wanted to do, though the last.

>She says that when she talks to me she feels shallow, as if she doesn't deserve a person like me in her life.

Could merely be a way to reject you without sounding like an asshole. "It's me, not you," usually means she lost interest, for whatever reason.

Ask straight questions. Ask why her behaviour is confusing.

>>37559200
If I were you, I'd stop talking to her, because whatever her case is you probably don't want to be apart of it.

>>37559246
All my thoughts exactly. I literally told her that. And she just keeps saying them. I asked direct questions, I really did. She's avoiding them. She just goes on and on. I don't understand, I mean I avoid saying "wow do you think I want something more from this relationship than just to be friends?" because you literally never know how it might end up. Along the lines of - I don't want it now, but I can't just burn that bridge in case I really do fall in love in the future.

>>37558329
Hey Nick.

>>37558895
Hey Atlas.

>>37559478
Just rip the bandaid off now, before it gets stuck. You were made to heal yourself.

>>37559476
Ah, that's the thing - even through all the shit that happened to me that week, my primary worry (this sounds irational I'm well aware of that) was to help her as much as I could. And it still is. Because, considering the things she went through, it's very understandable that she is avoidant, that she got scared after realising she opened up too much.
It sounds as if I'm trying to paint a picture of myself as being a "saint". No, I really care about her, it's because of the strong and true empathy I felt when we talked. She was the first one who didn't "shit" on my problems. She didn't say, "man up, you could be worse off than that etc".
I really care about her, I want to help. This kind of "relationship" is killing me. It's exhausting. But I still can't just leave her because I strongly bellieve she needs someone next to her. I said all of this to her..

>>37558329
KYS TRIPFAG DIEEEEE YOUR FUCKING RUINING MY BOARD YOUR NORMIE BRITSH TRASH JUST FUCKING KILL YOUR SELF ALREADY DIE

>>37559476

Bad advice. You don't know her, nor do I. She talks to him. See how things go, decide for yourself. Don't just cut her off.

>>37559478

Just wait. See what happens.

>>37559511

I disagree.

>>37559539
You can't help people who don't want your help. You may be more pain than help, also, though through no fault of your own.

>>37559554

If you care about a board this much, you need to get a life. Fast.

>>37559539
That's why you need to leave. It's exhausting you, and you worrying about her all the time without her giving you anything back isn't a healthy relationship.

>>37559565
I can't leave on that note. I can't.
It's not enough to make me leave. If everybody were to use that logic, than the people who trully needed help wouldn't get any, unless it came from themselves.
It's strange. I torture myself. And yet the thought of leaving her on her own is scarier than anything else.

>You may be more pain than help
I can't man.... It kills me to even think that way.. I'd just like to hear the truth.. It's really exhausting..

>>37559565
>She talks to him.
Barely, then not at all. It isn't good for people to give someone everything they have, and not get anything back.

>>37559609

They're just friends.

>>37559638
>And yet the thought of leaving her on her own is scarier than anything else.

This is probably more about you than her, though. You think you want to help her, but really, you probably want to be needed.

The truth may be that she experiences difficulty in being close to you. It's more frequent than is known.

>>37559652
A friendship is a relationship.

>>37559670

Yes, but that's not what you meant.

If you want to play sillyhead, you'll win.

>>37559652
That is 100% the truth. I do want to be needed. But isn't it a strange paradox? Isn't it the same with altruism? Isn't altruism just a type of selfishness in which it just happens to be that the things that help others simultaneously help you too?
Same thing - I want to help her because I want to be needed. I want the feeling of me helping someone else. It's selfish, I'm well aware of that.

>>37559731

Let's hope for you she didn't sense that. If she did, then that's her reason not to want you too close. Being needy while pretending to want to help never feels good on the other side.

What you say about altruism is true to some degree, but there's a balance, and in your case, it seems 90% for you rather than her.

You probably have feelings for her.

>>37559713
You're right. I did mean a romantic relationship, but either way it's still not good. If you give someone a lot of attention and try to be there all the time, but they can't even ask you how you're doing, then that shit isn't good.

>sillyhead
What?

>>37559788
>If you give someone a lot of attention and try to be there all the time

...then they may not want you too close.

Been in love with the same girl for 4 years know and im starting to lose my shit. This love is so toxic and destructive I would put it in the same category as being addicted to drugs. I constantly think about her, find out which classes she has so i can meet her "randomly", im basically a stalker and i hate that, i dont want to be such a person but i simply cant stop. I say to myself: "Today im gonna stop thinking about her, just ignore your feelings", but i always fail, I always have a quick sneak on her instagram or whatever ,and bamm, im back to being a miserable stalker

>>37559864

Did you approach her?

>>37559775
>Being needy while pretending to want to help never feels good on the other side.
Man... I didn't explain "my situation", it's how it is.
Look, I'd like to bellieve that it isn't how I explained it, but it is. There is not a person who I know that would call me being selfish and needy. I just look at it from a differenty perspective. There is no such thing as "pretending to want to help" - I want to help, it's just so that it happens that by helping her I help myself (as I said) - look let's not play dumb here - it's the unspoken truth okay? I'd like to bellieve it isn't but this world is so fucked up it wouldn't surprise me it is. It is the last thing I want to believe in.
Look, I would give my moments of happiness if I could (not that there are many, but you know where I'm going with this) and let her have them. She doesn't even have to know that I did. I would do it no questions asked.
As I said, I'd like to believe it isn't that way but I highly doubt it.

>>37559572
A life can revolve around a board, yes. People's lives revolve around such "pathetic" things. As long as it keeps you longing for another day of existence it is fine by me. Just like you start trash normie threads on a board that was meant for pure hearted people like my self.

>>37558329
Sometimes I feel really really sad and I don't know what to do :(

Also I get nervous sometimes and it's really hard for me.

Thoughts on paroxetine?

>>37559903
>There is not a person who I know that would call me being selfish and needy.

So? You called yourself both.

You want to be important to her, helping is secondary. If all you wanted as to help, not helping would be fine. You can't force people to need you.

Just wait and see what happens. Don't act like her servant, however. Don't respond immediately to messages. Don't act like a useful tool.

>>37559927
>A life can revolve around a board, yes.

A healthy, happy life, cannot.

>pure hearted

The pure hearted don't come up with terms to divide everyone from themselves in a pathetic attempt to feel better than others. You're not pure hearted, you are a faggot.

>>37559935

Give me concrete examples of that.

>>37559957

Fuck paroxetine and all SSRI. Given enough time, you'll feel better on your own just the same. I regret ever having used meds like those.

>>37559994
>>37560006

What was the get? Who has it?

>>37559994
Nick !!fj+6JtTXdtt 06/08/17(Thu)
>Name: Nick
>Species: Faggot

>>37559974
>So? You called yourself both.
There is no such thing as not being selfish.

>If all you wanted was to help, not helping would be fine.
What the hell? That doesn't make any sense. If you want to help them the last thing you want to hear is that you can't.

>Don't act like her servant, however. Don't respond immediately to messages. Don't act like a useful tool.

I don't care about any of that, I want to help her no matter what. If I cared about that I wouldn't still be talking to her.

>>37559864
We've been good friends for a long time and hangout from time to time, so yearh im in the "friendzone" if that even exists, and that just doesn't help me at all forget these poisonous feelings

Who here maladaptive coping mechanisms?

It's hard finding replacements for them when you don't find enjoyment or satisfaction in productive or beneficial ways to spend time. Also high as tits and I brushed my teeth this morning so I feel great about the person I've become today.

>>37560057
>There is no such thing as not being selfish.

There is. It's when you consider others in your decisions. Simple.

>What the hell? That doesn't make any sense. If you want to help them the last thing you want to hear is that you can't.

You only dislike not being needed because what you want is being needed. When I want to help you guys, if someone doesn't, I'm not affected.

This sounds unhealthy on both sides of the issue, hers and yours.

>>37560122
Are you serious? I don't know what to say to you. I wrote it up there man.

I suffer from severe depression and anxiety. I've been trying to do more to beat it but the fight just never ends. I'm starting to get into a mindset that it would just be best to learn to accept isolation. That if I do have the chance of getting old that I will be alone. That I should get used to that and stop trying to meet people. So far when I do try I get just get ghosted or no real meaningful connection happens.

>tfw always lose everything
I just wish I was smart and decent. Why can't I ever do anything right? I just always end up the loser in every situation.

>>37560917
I know those feels while also being paranoid about people, even ones I've known long enough to be comfortable around I never actually talk about myself. I had a single truly meaningful connection with someone once and they just up and fucking died anyways. I'd try to keep hope though, accepting your fate only means you'll for sure never have what you want rather than chances to try and fail or possibly succeed.

>>37560917

Connect with people, just find the right people to connect with, and do it right.

Tell me how it goes when you try.

>>37560947

Give me a concrete example.

>>37561025

As Oscar Wilde said, there are only two tragedies in life, one is not getting what you want, and the other is getting it.

More than cocks came out of that mouth, lemme tell you.

>>37558329
Hey Nick, glad you're back. Got some things to drop and questions I need answered, will do so after saying hi to everyone.
>>37558870
Hey Atlas, how's it going?
>>37559489
Hey Eh. Sup?

>>37561053
Yeah I'll just go ahead and invest my millions of dollars into a company while I'm at it. Look I am trying but it is not working. The close I had was this one girl I met from a game. She seemed to genuinely care for me but I ruined it. For some reason I just lashed out at her and decided being friends with her was some how toxic to my life. I had to end it. Whether trying or not I'm the problem and I can't fix myself. Hence why I am just rationalizing that maybe I should just stay away from people. I'm no good for anyone even myself.

>>37561324

Have you considered doing therapy? Have you ever looked up Borderline disorder?

Details are always important, if you'd like to drop a few.

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If i could feel anything, it wouldn't feel like this.

It's frustrating, not being able to feel anything while others around me are enjoying themselves.
I've been struggling with depression since highschool, i never told anyone outside of this website.

Reason why?
Its fucking embarrassing.

Every normy is shit posting on social media pretending to have depression to get attention, even now i feel ashamed admitting I'm miserable.

I can't tell anyone irl because they'd think im a fucking pussy, tell me to man up, or think im an entitled little bitch.

Everytime someone implys i have a mental illnesses i just deflect it with jokes and sarcastic remarks.

It fucking hurts, and I can't do anything about it.

That's all i got to get off my chest today, sorry for ranting.

Since some of you guys are alright, don't go to school tomorrow.

>>37561365
Not sure what detailed you'd need. I haven't really looked into getting diagnosed with anything some doctors have thrown around the idea I have ptsd or some other mental disorders but I honestly don't think I do. Just the depression shit. I'm mean fuck if I know I guess I rather not find out. I've been going to therapy it is okay to vent but other than that it doesn't really help.

>>37558329
Ok so you already know my past problems with relationships. How do I keep from projecting what always happened to me in the past onto people I meet? At this point a female (barring family and one friend) showing a slight bit of interest in me and I completly shut down, even to the point of becoming rude to complete strangers to get away, only realizing how stupid what I did was after the fact? At job 2 I'm working with 3, soon to be 4 females and I don't need to be that one asshole at work. Any thoughts?

>>37561477
>Not sure what detailed you'd need.

>>37561324
>She seemed to genuinely care for me but I ruined it. For some reason I just lashed out at her and decided being friends with her was some how toxic to my life.

>>37561569
Put on a character infront of women, i suggest that guy from the movie drive.

The good thing is that you wont talk much as him, a few gestures and 5 words sentences max.

Results may vary.

>>37561631
I remember that greentext

>>37561631

Don't be retarded. Absolute shit tier advice.

>>37561587
Oh uh... She seemed like she cared wanted to talk to me a lot and told. Me if I ever had any problems I could talk to her. Started feeling like I could go to hear for anything. Of course hard to keep promises like that. Some days I'd really need help and she'd never been there. Started realizing I was relying on her filly knowing she can't do anything for me. Started getting super bitter and toxic towards her. Sending verbal jabs and threatening cutting off contact with her. Eventually I figured out how fucked I was being and decided to end it. She adamantly did not want me to but I knew it had to be done blocked all contact with her.

>>37561757

This is some sick behaviour I'll never fully comprehend.

Do you understand your own behaviour?

>>37561801
Guess it was a mistake coming here and opening up.

>>37561865

You feel attacked very quickly, even when there is no attack made on you.

My question wasn't rhetorical: do you understand your own behaviour?

>>37561874
Not fully no. Why? I know what I did was bad which is why I ended it.

>>37561917

Ending it was not a good choice. But it was easier for you.

I'm very interested in how you behave in a way that doesn't fully make sense to you and not focus hard on it until it makes sense. That's a fascinating mystery to me, and, for personal reasons, I'd like to know more about that.

Suspiciously empty thread tonight.

>>37561979
How was it not a good choice? I've already tried to work it out with her and my problems several times with no changes. I was treating her poorly. She deserves a better friend than I was acting. It was also better for me in terms of my emotional state.

>>37562212
>She deserves a better friend than I was acting.

You should have been a better friend. If you know what's wrong, solve it.

>>37561035
>lose every game I play
>inevitably suck at every hobby
>lose all online arguments
>come out for the worse in every social situation
>fail school no matter how hard I try

>>37562365
Bridge has been burned. It is over.

>>37562377

How much of this depends on your perception? Probably most of it.

>>37562400

Of course. I meant in the past.

>>37562190
lurking tonight. i want to be social, online and offline. but im too tired

>>37562190
>>37561569
I'm just waiting on you Nick.

>>37562526

For?

I wonder.

>>37562581
I guess working your magic and fixing my issues I just can't comprehend/handle myself. Or even your thoughts on this, is it a serious issur, will it go away in time, is it all in my head? How do I fix myself?

>>37562676
>issur
Issue. Fuck!

>>37561569

Have a friendship with a woman. Remember that what happened to you doesn't happen to everyone.

Don't ignore the signs you were shown before.

If a girl is hopping on your dick before you guys are together, that's a warning sign.

>>37561752
Better than your abysmal normie tier shit advice.
Might as well tell him to
>Just bee yourself

>>37562951

No, actually, it really was horrible shit advice. "Act like the guy in Drive," seriously? Have you ever met a woman in your life?

Being oneself is all you can do, but there are ways to be yourself which you should use, and others you should avoid. Never try to pass as someone you're not, because that will always backfire, one way or another.

>>37562428
Failure is objective. I objectively fail. People even take things away from me when I'm trying to do something because they think I'll screw up.

>>37562902
>Have a friendship with a woman.
I do, known her since we were both 3. Is lesbian so don't have to worry about her getting closer and hurting me.
>Remember that what happened to you doesn't happen to everyone.
No what happened only happened to me. Nobody else I know went through this shit. Maybe that's why I like making people happy, because it makes me feel like I'm worth something to them?
>Don't ignore the signs you were shown before.
Like the other person showing interest? The only people who don't ever hurt me are those I stay away from, or who stay away from me.
>If a girl is hopping on your dick before you guys are together, that's a warning sign.
Yeah that's true. There's been no non-professional contact between me and anyone since then.

>>37563075

I'm not too convinced. You sure sound like you believe you're a failure, and this is what people will see most of all.

I've seen awkward people act like bosses and nobody assumed they were awkward, while less awkward people made a huge deal of their awkwardness, and everyone assumed they were.

>>37563096
>Like the other person showing interest?

Showing interest is done in different ways.

A woman literally hopping on your dick to show interest should have sent some alarms off.

I guess I'm slightly depressed, it varies from time to time. Like sometimes I'm just 100% numb and just don't want to go on, sometimes I'm just really sad for some time and then, sometimes it's ok (i think weather plays a big part).

I'm doing pretty well with people, have some really good friends, but we want to do shit and we're living in a small city, so all we do is drugs.

I'm not addicted to any drug, although I might be addicted to being high on a drug.
I've tried speed, mdma and will try dem soon and basically drugs are all I'm living for. Like I don't even crave them or anything, but there is so little I'm doing in my life apart from school, that drugs are most of what I'm doing in my free time. And that sucks.

>>37563131
>Showing interest is done in different ways.
Yes true.
>A woman literally hopping on your dick to show interest should have sent some alarms off.
If I'd had any real experience back then I'd have known this. If I wasn't socially fucking retarded I'd have known this. But here I am.

I suffer from crippling Social Anxiety to the point where I can't even talk to my family without having a racing heart, frozen face, voice that barely comes out and cracks. I am so self conscious and paranoid, to the point where I am aware of my surroundings 24/7, and am never able to relax, even on my own. I can feel other people know something is wrong, but no one ever says anything. I see their pity stares all the time. I've given up pretty much.

>>37563133

If you experience altered states of consciousness based on how you feel, maybe drugs aren't a good idea.

Any obvious cause for your depression?

I think I have lost all of my motivation to study. I have a Latin exam tomorrow and haven't even touched anything related to it today. Hell I am pretty decent at Latin but I don't remember the last time I studied thoroughly not only Latin but any other subject. I think I am slowly succumbing into being a COMPLETELY unremarkable robot. I used to be the smart guy but I just can't bother anymore.

How the fuck should I find motivation to study at a school I hate even if it's my last year?

>>37563188

Sounds like C-PTSD.

Are your parents nice?

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Hey Atlas! You know breathing in between inhaling hamgurgers doesn't count as a diet, right?

>>37563221

Might be depression without you realising just how depressed you are.

>>37563133
I'm in a pretty similar situation, do you have any other symptoms? Except feeling sad and numb.
Don't do drugs, it's not worth it. Are you doing it because of your friends? Like, you consume them together?

>>37563229
My dad is, but my mom freaks out over the simplest thing. She feels the most pity, and that kind of shit kills me. Whenever I have bant with dad and we make fun of each other, she will look at him in a way to get him to stop because she thinks im made of glass. That shit always makes me self conscious. Definitely not C-PTSD though.

>>37563260

Her pity is like an attack on you: it tells you she thinks you're weak. Did you grow up being told you were weak, this way?

>>37563294
Not really, although I do live a sheltered life. She won't let me do anything myself, she has to be the one to do it. This extends to my dad too. Treats us like retards pretty much. Even when we do something, like wash the dishes, she will come over and start screaming how we fucked everything up and then she has to clean after us.

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>>37563327

Being raised this way will severely hinder your development as a person.

The symptoms you described are typical of people raised by such parents, and it is CPTSD. You may not think so, but if the mere presence of your parents gives you physical reactions, you should know you're dealing with a very serious situation.

Make no mistake, you've been under attack for a long time, and this type of behaviour is psychological abuse.

It may take some time before you accept this, but you won't make any progress until you understand your past and your present.

>>37563238
I don't know anymore it could be that. I haven't gone out to meet my only friends in such a long time and seeing the same faces I want to shit on everyday only to stay home the weekend has probably demotivated me to bother about school.

This has probably said so many times before but I have nobody else to tell so here goes.

Constantly feel inept at everything, do very little things correctly in my day to day, parents always use to re-do everything i did because I didn't do it properly, dad constantly used shout at me for lacking basic common sense, would always go the most difficult path with every, was never intuitive enough see easier routes. So yeh thats it basically, just had to get that off my chest

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>>37563397
>seeing the same faces I want to shit on everyday

Kinky.

>>37563412

Dad was a narc. Learn about it, heal.

Tough day today. Just really busy because we were a man down and Weds is the busiest day every week yet somehow it was even busier. I'm starting to get the sense that certain coworkers dislike me, but fuck them as long as I get the job done. Got two pieces of criticism which were unwelcome, one of which contradicted another piece from a different manager. Anyway I said
>Thank you for that feedback
because I gathered that that was the appropriate thing to say and she snorted. Fuck you too then, whore.

I had some praise as well, but it wasn't really heeded as much as criticism. Maybe most people are that way, I dunno.

Really fancied getting blasted afterward but I didn't drink at all. I feel a bit pleased with myself. Not a huge amount, but a bit. Not sure whether I would have been better served stopping out at the pub for a pint or coming back here and getting out of my work clothes and having a cup of tea, which is what I did. Didn't even get an unhealthy snack. Just had an orange. Also realised that I haven't eaten all day. So that's nice.

In other news, I received an envelope from my mother.

Whoever can guess what was in it will have a wish.

Good luck.

>>37563486
A patronising amount of money, a key or some kind of legal document/ threat

>>37563502

All wrong. I expected a legal threat, however.

>>37563443

Narc? Like my dad was a narcissist?

>>37563560

In the clinical sense of the word. His behaviour sounds like one, yes. Shitting on others to feel better. Feeding off others' suffering.

>>37563574
Oh would make sense, probably through learnt behaviour that i'm a narc now

>>37563629

I doubt it. You may have fleas, as they say, but probably not a narc.

Fleas can be nasty, sometimes.

Cool name.

>>37563486
a bill asking for the money back that they spent on you growing up

>>37563787

Nice one. But no.

>>37563679
yeh im trying to work up the courage and go against my anxiety to go to my doctor so hopefully I can get a diagnosis and hopefully get a specialist/medication.

Also thanks! Its my grandfather's name so i think its really cool aswell

>>37563814
>Grandfather's name is Gael
Does Vinhelm know you post on /r9k/?

>>37563814

Meds aren't the solution. Check Richard Grannon on YouTube, check whatever you like.

This is purely psychological, no mood imbalance or anything.

please give feedback

I finally worked up nerve to start duloxetine today.

two issues:
I feel like I'll never have the motivation to become a normie and strike up conversations, learn social skills, etc. I feel like my lack of motivation is my fault and is because I'm lazy. Any opinion on this? Like how do I know if maybe there's hope some medication will make me willing to do these things.

I was prescribed duloxetine because of my low mood. Lately my mum's been watching a movie with me every night which I can actually be happy for. Is it bad I'm taking an anti-depressant if I can experience 2 hours of joy on most days now? Because I've heard depression is inability to experience joy ever. When I got prescribed I had gone two months without even being able to enjoy a movie.


I have diagnosis of OCD but no depression or anxiety diagnosis, although I clearly have social anxiety (never tried to make friends in high school, cut off all contact with primary school friends after final exams of high school, shut-in NEET).

>>37563879

haha yes very funny, its a celtic/irish name, great granfather came from Belfast, wanted to keep Irish heritage alive in his bloodline when he went to england so he went with the most celtic name he could think of

>tfw pretty sure my amalgam fillings (fourteen of them, thank you shitty parent) are driving me insane

>>37563897

Medication isn't your problem or solution. Socialising is learned through socialising, observing others, etc. Asking questions helps a lot. Just ask people things and listen.

Find out why you stayed away from people. Might be key.

>>37563486
A wish? Ok I really need that so let's see:
>Letter asking/begging for money
>Childhood picture with a Narc-y handwritten note on back
>note trying to get you to call her and/or let slip where your escaped siblings are.
Ok now for my wish:
Us in these threads having our brains and hearts fixed

>>37563897
if it makes any difference I still can't watch normal movies, I can only forget about how much an failure I am when watching old 1940's movies.


>>37563938
I stayed away from people because of fear of rejection, self-hating thoughts, the usual. I'm actually not a social retard amazingly, I understand people 100%. I just can't come up with things to say or work up courage to do it.

My biggest issue is no motivation/courage/enthusiasm to feel like a weird pathetic failure talking to people (I know I'm meant to resist self-hate thoughts, justgiviing description here)

>>37563973

Nice wish.

Way off on the guess.

I doubt anyone will ever find out. It nonplussed me and pissed me off.

>>37564032
I know had I been you, I'd have burnt the entire thing without ever opening it.

>>37564509

Had it been a legal threat, as I expected, it would have caused me problems. I'm not getting into trouble for them.

Keep guessing, guys.

http://fotogenerator.npocloud.nl/

Draw me some fucked up shit, if nothing else.

>>37564526
a letter letting you know she loves you

>>37564632

HAhaha, good one.

Nope.

>>37564539
>doesn't work on mobile
Stupid iShit (on fun) phone

I made an online friend and i like him but the experience is really weird to me. I have no idea how to act and its slightly uncomfortable but i do really like talking to him. how do i figure out how to act around someone when i cant judge their reactions to what i say?

>>37564909

Don't worry about it. If you can't see it, you're not expected to compute it.

Good night.rbggw

>>37565012
Later Nick see you around.

Aye doc, I've gone out a few times with this girl I've known for a good while now she recently broke up with her bf an asked me out. To be honest I actually think she quite like's me you know, we've always had this thing with each other for a while now. But obviously shits hard and I feel myself doubting and sperging out sometimes, I think it's because I actually like her a lot. How can I keep my sperging in check I don't wanna fuck this up.

>>37565245
Too late fuck my life mane.

I feel retarded, I can't talk
my best friend needs support and I don't know what to say

>>37563221
Latin can be a bitch, it was probably my least favorite subject in high school, even with a wonderful teacher.
Ypu find motivation by reminding yourself that it is the last year, that the people you are forced to socialize with will be gone. Heck, i stopped even greet some of my classmates, we pretend we don't know each other.
Find happiness in you real friends, the one you can really depend on and doesn't care about you because you are the smart one they can copy homework.
Do you have any idea about you future?

>>37565738
Support for what? Sometimes is not enough just be there, just ask him something generic and start from there

File: 1488582658512.jpg (13KB, 247x243px) Image search: [Google]

13KB, 247x243px

I feel like nothing is real. Very Truman Show-esque.
I know it sounds stupid but I can't get rid of the feeling.
Like everyone is in on something that I'm not. Sometimes I'll hear someone say something that triggers it really bad. I've tried talking about it before but it's hard to put in word without coming off as a crazy person.
I've been like this a few years now it's been getting worse the last few months.
I essentially trust nobody anymore. Not even family/friends.

>>37565955
bad shit is happening in his life, and he's telling me about it in chat, while I just read without saying anything,
I literally cannot think about anything to say

>>37566094
Offer you help, if you can do something about it, otherwise your moral support. Make him know he can count on you if he ever need it. It sounds obvious, but it makes the difference to actually being told it instead of simply assume it. I went through a really rough period recently (health issues with my mother, we didn't know if she was going to survive) and the only reason i wasn't completely crushed by this is because of my friends. Maybe meet him in person, if it helps you talk about it
>>37566090
You really need to see someone

>>37566331
I told him that I'm always here for him if he needs any help, but it's hard to show that I care when I don't say anything else,
and no we can't meet we live too far apart

>>37566395
Then just say that to him, that you really care even if it doesn't seem from just a few phrases. Tell him that you find difficult to elaborate it better, but that you really care. The point is that you really care, and if he cares about you (probably since he's asking for help) is not going to think that you are pretending to be interested

>>37566556
I did exactly that, and he told me that he feels better now that he let it all out, so I guess I helped somehow

The internet is the only real human contact I have. I live alone, and crippling depression and anxiety keeps me down. Drugs don't help and I don't have any confidence though I'm reasonably attractive.

>>37566671
Good, glad to hear that.
It's almost 1 am where i live, and hopefully tomorrow i'll manage to study something. goodnight everyone

>>37566754
same, goodnight

Anyone still around, I wonder?

If my father and his 3 brothers have mental illnesses what are the chances that i have one? They all have schizofrenia and bipolarity.

>>37567998
It's not a dead cert, but it's far more likely than someone without that impediment. If you've manifested no symptoms thus far, avoid too much stress and cannabis/ acid and you might never trigger it, if it is latent.

>>37568041
Im late un the cannabis one, i'm not really related with symptoms but sometimes i may experience paranoia, like some times i'm really sure that anything is real kind of Matrix and It's really hard for me to think that people have lives a part of the moment i see them.

>>37568191
That's derealisation. It might be nothing now. If you keep on with the weed though, you're fucked. If you have a genetic predisposition, which you more than likely do, every spliff brings you one step closer to a psychotic break. If you keep on with it, it's all but inevitable.

>>37568245
I will leave weed behind then, and what exactly happens when you get a psychotic break? After you get one you are oficially crazy?

i cut myself when i hear my roommate bang his gf

>>37568373
Well, it's not brilliant I can tell you.

>Psychosis is an abnormal condition of the mind that involves a "loss of contact with reality". People experiencing psychosis may exhibit personality changes and thought disorder. Depending on its severity, this may be accompanied by unusual or bizarre behavior, as well as difficulty with social interaction and impairment in carrying out daily life activities.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychosis

>>37568478
Have you ever experienced one?

>>37568542
Most of my family has. Judging by that definition there, I certainly have. I'm in therapy twice a week for some fairly severe symptoms and attempting to slowly increase the number of hours a week I'm able to cope with. I'm nearly 30 and I don't know if I'll ever be able to hold down a full time job quite honestly. Too much stress, brought about by too many hours' work, could have truly dire consequences.