What do you do when your friends start talking about sex and

>>37548880
>Yeah, man, I fucked this random bitch on Tinder last week, shit was great

Just fuck the bitch. She won't care she won't care unless you have a tiny dick.

>>37548880

My friends don't talk about sex. I never been part of a conversation like that. Only 1 of 4 is a virgin. Strange

>>37548937

>"Awesome, bro! I want to see pictures of the bitch. Show us her Tinder profile!"

>>37549071
thanks jimmy two times

Own it, honestly. It will fuck with their probable, narrow ass life views.

It's hilarious, man. Saying the most edgy, raunchy shit with a blunt delivery is unbeatable and is fun as fuck to do. If anyone accuses you of being a virgin, show zero sign of caring. Once people realize they have no real control over you, and that you don't give a fuck about sex, money, or whatever bullshit people try to control you with, they'll go through a loop because they can't adequately describe what is going on. And normies hate dealing with the idea that the universe is a cluster fuck of random shit chaotically happening.

>friends
idk dude I haven't had friends in 6 years.

>>37549318
I mean this is the best way to go but it will whittle down your actual friends extremely fast, so be ready for that.

>>37549318
>"Haha yeah guys I ejaculated into this smelly bitch whore with my semens. She had 10 orgasms coz.. heh you know... I'm awesome in bed"
>"Nice Anon. What was her name?"
>"Uhhhmm R-r-rachel. Yeah. Rachel Dolezal"
>"Total cock hungry whore"
>sweating bullets

That's how I picture you Anon.

>>37548880
>Befriending non-robots

what're you fucking stupid?

>>37548880
guess what: they already know

>hanging out with people who aren't okay with you being a virgin
That's where you're going wrong mate

I have a date for casual sex this Friday, I'm losing my virginity.. how do I fuck

>>37548880
Just be honest about being a virgin if it comes up.

>>37550128
I should not even dignify this with a response....

If you can't figure that out, I advise against the date.

>>37550128
Get your dick hard and slam it in her. If you think she's cute then kiss her and be sensual and put your tongue down her throat. Once you've verified it's not rape you can just be as aggressive as humanly possible. Dominate her.

the trick is to not have friends in the first place

>>37550181
i've never even kissed a girl, I just made a tinder for fun.. this girl is very aggressively asking for sex, she seems depressed and lonely and is talking about how she has no friends in the area etc so maybe i'll have a psychological advantage anyways

While I still had friends they all knew me as "that guy anon who never gets with girls". Virginity never came up. I don't think they knew, but maybe a few of them suspected as such. It became kind of an inside-joke where we'd joke about how I would never find a girl, but the difference was that they were joking and I was completely serious. Oh well.

>>37550291
Just get a little drunk pop a benzo and some Viagra and go to town

>>37550181
>Get your dick hard and slam it in her.
Haha he's gonna miss and slip it into her asshole

>>37550359
>benzo + alcohol
No mate, you can literally get a heart attack. Choose one or the other

>>37548880
>roommate comes back drunk and upset about his girlfriend
>starts wanted to vent at me
>no idea what to say
>other roommate comes back thankfully

They already know I'm a virgin. I just stay out of their conversations about it, and hope they don't make a virgin joke at me.

>>37550359
she literally just sent "im sexually frustrated and masturbating isn't doing it for me, do you want to meet up tomorrow?" and i said yes. im really not thinking straight I just keep saying yes

>>37549096
Tch, she got clingy bros, had to block her ass.

My group of friends doesn't talk about sex or dating. I'm not sure how to describe it, but we just don't bring up those kinds of things, never have, in the 13 or so years we've been friends. Cause of work schedules we can only meet up a couple times a month at most and we spend that talking about our jobs (we work in the same industry) and talking about our hobbies. We all like anime, video games, read the same kind of books, etc. Two of our group have girlfriends, me and another guy are virgins who've never had a girlfriend. It hasn't really changed our group dynamic at all.

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>>37550181
For some weird reasons, this comment gave me a boner...

>>37548880
Even when I tell them that I am they still don't believe me and think I'm joking.

>>37550359
now shes saying she'll give me head tonight, fucking hell this is weird

>>37550128
this really esclalated quickly, now im going to her place tonight to have xxx. wish me luck

>>37550439
>No mate, you can literally get a heart attack. Choose one or the other
No you idiot its the opposite. Your respiratory system slows down and you stop breathing

>>37550903
>tfw Anon gets catfished, jumped and gutted in a robbery gone wrong
Maybe they'll Facebook live cast it and you can live on as a meme.