Need critical advice

>>37442547
don;t you have to be considered in serious immediate danger to be place in protective custody. Have fun realizing how shit this idea is and living with a criminal record, never being able to integrate back into society like you should have originally


Man this post is so autistic.

>>37442547
Rape your oneitis to get in.

Unless you live in Sweden or Norway, please don't do this.

Stupidest thing I've read all night
Solitary confinment is fucking hell. If you want a taste of it then lock yourself in your bathroom for a week. You will be suicidal and be driven into insanity. Have you not heard of cabin fever?

>>37442547
Being left alone with a computer/access to entertainment is very different from being locked up in a concrete box with literally nothing to do for years. You could occasionally read books or do menial labor, but that's still a lot of downtime in between.

If you've done research on prison life then you must have seen how staving boredom is a big part of it. Prisoners deal with it often with social stuff like playing cards and gambling.

>>37442547
seriously the dumbest possible solution to this problem

>>37442547
If your mental health is still ok, don't do it. My dad went to a high security prison and it broke him.

>>37442649
>>37442678
I'm pretty sure i'll get to have a tv. Which is fine because I love moobies.

>>37442575
I don't want or need a job you fucking wagecuck. Why would a criminal record matter to me?

>>37442576
Nah. It has to be a completely non violent crime

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>this is bait
If it isn't you're retarded

"taking care of yourself" is so easy. Just do everything your parents drilled into your head from the time your were 1
>brush teeth and other basic hygiene
>do laundry about once a week
>learn to cook easy shit like spaghetti or just eat out a lot or both
>clean your room/apartment every once in a while
>pay bills
ezpz

>>37442777
Godly trips my dude
Let me tell ya, if you rape your oneitis, you'll lose your virginity and get free shelter

>>37442828
>do laundry about once a week
I know how to do it, but being around people gives me extreme anxiety, I couldn't go in public to a laundromat with my dirty clothes without having a panic attack and I don't own a washing machine myself

>learn to cook easy shit like spaghetti
this is easier said than done

>pay bills
lol wot how?

Why would I want to do all that bullshit when there is a state sanctioned way for me to avoid it all?

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>>37442829
pls giv new idea

>>37442777
>tv
LOL
Did you even watch any of those prison shows? The only thing they have in their room is a bed and a toilet. No books, no TV, no papers, no coloring books, just you and an empty room for years.
Oh, and don't forget the other psychotic inmates who fucking scream all night long.

This shit aint a joke you fucking idiot. Go join the military.

>>37442885
They all have tv's you spaz. They have clear backs on them so you can't hide stuff in them.

>>37442894
In solitary confinment? They fucking do not.
Go join the military
Why would you even want a serious criminal record for something so stupid

>>37442915
Do you think just because i'm in that section that i'll be classified as one of the people in the hole? Dumbass. I'll be in protective custody, it's just part of the same section

>>37442547
This is the most retarded idea I have read all year, and being on 4chan a lot this says much.

OP you are a feeble manchild, prison isn't for you. Just because you watched it on TV and imagined it in your fantasy to be a wonderland that cares for all your needs, doesn't make it a suitable environment for you.

Don't do this.

Seems to me, it's time for you to grow up, At least to some minor degree. It's time for change buddy boy. I know this is hard, at least for the coming months, but in a year you'll look back to it and probably be a much happier person because of it. You will have learnt some valuable skills, and grew as a person. Get your shit together, move out, and learn to care for yourself. It's not THAT hard.

>>37442943
Why are you even on this board if it's so easy for you to do all that shit you fucking faggot.

It won't even be prison as we think of it, i'll be in as much danger of being killed by them as you are thousands of miles away. Honestly the main question I want answered is what crime to commit because none of you have good reasons not to do this.

>>37442928
Yes, you will. Because it's not a hotel its fucking prison.
You know what, just go on with your shitty idea. I'll sleep easy knowing a stupid retard ruined his life by not taking the advice of others.

You're fucking retarded kid. Get a god damn job.

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>>37442859
>>do laundry about once a week
get a laundry machine or go at unconventional hours like I do. I go on fridays around 10 pm cause I know everyone else is doing shit
>>learn to cook easy shit like spaghetti
>boil water
>add hard noodles
>wait like 20 minutes
>warm up premade sauce like preggo
>put spaghetti on plate, add sauce
>ezpz

>>pay bills
google it or ask your parents for help

>Why would I want to do all that bullshit when there is a state sanctioned way for me to avoid it all?
cause its easy as balls to do and this way you can shitpost on 4chan or do whatever you heart desires
If you would rather do absolutely nothing for the rest of your life in prison you should kill yourself instead

>>37442986
>the guards are incapable of having people on different levels of security in the same section
They aren't as dumb as you, you fucking wagecuck. Why are you even here?

>>37442547
go to the dark web and aquire some CP. Make sure you get caught with it and no harm done.

>>37443014
No that's fucked up cunt

>>37442986
>Get a god damn job.
thats not advice. you're not helping you judgemental retard

>>37442971
I'm on this board cause I'm a neet and a virgin, but I live at my own place. Don't you collect neet bux for your anxiety disorder? Can't you move to a place where they have a washing machine you can use?

I just don't see your problem OP, living on your own isn't that hard, even for us robots. Learning to cook isn't that hard, boiling water and throwing shit in there, or heating up a frying pan and throwing shit in there or putting something in the microwave and pressing a button isn't hard..

You can use the internet just fine, I'm sure you can figure out how to pay all your bills online, that's how I do it.
I leave my little flat maybe two times a month, tops.

It's a great way of life too for a robot. No one around that pesters you for your life style, no pesky family that bugs you. You can lurk on 4chan all day long and play vidya and take long naps, and eat what you want when you want and do whatever the fuck you want. It's freedom you're looking forward to, once you've figured the basics out, you'll be much happier than you are now I think.

That's why I say don't throw your freedom away with a stupid plan like this.

>>37443032
>my parents are kicking me out because I don't contribute to my family nor society
>maybe you should get a job so that you are simultaneously keeping yourself busy, earning money, and doing the community a service
>lol thats not advice and not helpful
Like >>37443002 said, if Op is going to rot away in prison because he is lazy then he should save everybody the trouble and money and kill himself.

>op thinks he'll get a personal TV in jail and any more than an hour outside his cement box a day

Lol

>>37443146
Have you not fucking seen the shows? They all have personal tvs you fucking pleb

Just rob a store with a finger gun under your shirt mate. Non violent and will get you a few years, just make sure you will 100% be in protection

>>37443094
omg you don't even know what robot means
go back to facebook fucking retard

>>37443278
>finger gun
fuck off anon that's stupid

Can anyone who isn't a cunt or a moron give me an idea

>>37442547

Don't commit a crime in the United States. Go to Finland or some other Norwegian country and commit a crime there. Their jails are basically summer camps. Get jail for five years, come back. Tell your parents you agree that it's time for you to go out in your own, and if they can give you some money to get started. Get a passport, book a flight to Europe through Google flights, and hold up a bank there pretendin to brandish a firearm. Calmly give into police and fight your case. No pleas go to trial. Then enjoy prison.

>>37442777
>>37443222
>>37443333
Btw I got 2 trips and a quads in this thread. Maybe god is telling me this is a good idea.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D04wb7P_v-4

Literally OP, I'm pretty sure this is a troll thread.

>>37442547
Voluntarily commit yourself to a mental health facility. You can leave whenever you want too. Tell them you feel like killing yourself. Much more comfy than prison where you'll undoubtedly get your ass kicked and raped, because you sound like a little bitch who can't take care of himself. I'm recommending this because I've been to prison and it's literally the worst thing ever, unless you live in Sweden or something.

All the shit you read about prison vs the reality of how they operate is different. They say they offer solitary to anyone who asks but good luck. You'll still be in a cell with Tyrone the rape murderer, bitching to the warden who doesn't give a fuck to give you your own cell because you're a delicate snowflake.

>>37443350
Thanks anon. Do they not send you back to your own country in these situations? They just pay for visitors to be in their prisons?

>>37443357
Won't they force me to eat brain numbing pills?

I've seen the shows, they protect those who need it.

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>>37443353
oh its bait for sure
I'm just humoring him on the off chance he actually thinks he can survive in a prison

>>37443402
It's not fucking bate you cunt. If you don't want to help i'm sure there's other stupid threads you can post in.

Prison (or even fucking jail for that matter) is a legitimate fucking hellhole. Being homeless is even fucking preferable to having someone telling you when it's okay to go to bed, shower, eat, etc. The vast majority of people aren't homeless or in prison/jail though. You can make it anon you just gotta set your sights high and fuck what everyone says.

>>37443422
Maybe for a normie like you, they give me food and I shower like once or twice a week now anyway, so them telling me to do it will be an upgrade. Also they can't force me to sleep, they just turn the lights off at 10:45.

I spend almost all my time shitposting, reading and watching tv. The only difference will be no shitposting and I hate this place anyway so it'll be good.

>>37443308
maybe for you robot means someone who is literally retarded and can't take care of himself and needs a literal caretaker.

just because I can operate a fucking washing machine and a microwave doesn't make me not a robot.

I still hope you're trolling, but I start to loose interest in trying to talk sense into you, by all means go ahead and get raped by tyrone in prison on a daily basis, you fucking idiot.

>it's completely confirmed, i'm moving out in 2 months

Fucking retarded and selfish boomer scum. 2 months is not nearly enough time to get a job or an apartment, even if you're a normie or a Chad. I wish I could give you advice, but boomers are selfish narcissists and your parents probably wouldn't give a shit if you ended up homeless or dead. It's ALL about their comfort and enjoyment. Like they were too damn busy focusing on themselves, instead of teaching you how to cook, pay bills and take care of yourself. Now you're an adult and not cute any more and you cost money (money they could spend on themselves) so they simply kick you out, zero fucks given.

Gas all the fucking boomers.

>>37443442
That wasn't me (OP) but I agree with him. You are at best a cyborg and need to fuck off if you don't want to help me.

I WONT BE WITH TYRONE CUNT

>>37443441
Or you can just feel bad for yourself and seriously consider getting locked up over some stupid shit so you don't have to face everything. If this post is legit then killing yourself would be a better end all to be honest.

>>37442986
call' people kid

fundamentally misunderstands what life is like in a low security prison

get a job??

dude you sound like a whiney bitch teenager who has it "all figured out" let me guess everyone around you is a retard and you're the chosen one, basically smarter than everyone else, etc.

>>37443471
I'm not suicidal. Why the fuck do you normies think it's cool to pretend to be a robot? It's honestly the most fucked up behaviour ever

>>37443455
I do want to help you. Telling you how to go into prison or encouraging you to do so is not helping you though. But I'll do fuck off now, I'm outta this thread, this is getting too stupid.

>>37443352
probably man, i'd go low security, white collar crime, aim for a few months inside. low security prisons are basically expenive ass adult daycare centres.

it isn't a nasty horrible place, there is internet, xbox, tv, okay food, no raping.

>>37443516
Jesus christ, I didn't even think of super low security. Good idea, what kind of crime could I do to get there? Would it have to be in a certain area near a low security place to make sure I get sent there?

>>37443503
Alrighty then. Go forth and destroy your life.

>>37443554
How will it be worse than life currently dickhead?

>>37443507
Good. Go back to your chad life that's so easy to attain, I'm sure Stacey is ready for her nightly fucking.

>>37443485
Nope but if you think of me as some sort of genius than be my guest. I'm a no life loser but at least I worked for my own place. Started as a kids shoe store salesman to assistant manager of a dumb expensive clothing store to being a CADD drafter to being a manufacturing engineer.
Never claimed to be the "chosen one" (??) but seeing how you write makes me feel like one.
Also nice greentext, kid.

>>37443573
Well, if you're legit considering going to jail or prison then you're fucking delusional. You really think that doing some stupid shit would pay off in the long run? Have fun trying to do anything with a record after that shits over. You think you'll feel like you want to go to prison forever? When you were younger I bet you wanted to live in a fucking chuckee cheese.

>>37443587
>bragging about being socially and financially well off on /r9k/
You might be a bigger loser than me desu, you have a good life and you're here rubbing people's noses in it. Fuck you cunt.

>>37443594
What stupid normie activities do you think i'll want to do that I can't because of a criminal record? Not everyone is a fucking normie that would care about a record. I wouldn't even notice I had it

>>37443545
maybe a financial crime? have a look at what kind of people are committing what kind of crime that lands them in these low security places

>>37443391

It depends. Look up the laws.

>>37443621
As I said earlier, go forth and destroy your life. If you cannot see the negative aspects of being locked up then you're a fucking moron.

>>37442547

Whatever you do, please mention during the trial that this exact reasoning is why you did it. Won't get any years off your stay, but I just want to see the repercussions.

>>37442547
Become a criminal if you got nothing to lose. It's a really romantic life. But first, you gotta get jacked and start shit like boxing or MMA, otherwise you'll be pushed around and being the muscle pays. Then rob a store to get connection while you do time in jail and voila, you're an outlaw. Crime pays in general, roughnecks who just don't care anymore get double of that.

>>37443650
lmao. that's not even a fucking argument. stupid fucking normie.

>>37442713
Can you tell me more details . How is he different know ??

>>37442547
Isolation will seriously fuck you up forever. Most likely will try to kill yourself and become a drugged up zombie in a psych ward within a month

>>37443650
if you think robots don't already live like prisoners you're deluded

>>37442713

How is your dad doing ,

Original comment .

>>37443666
Lol you haven't said one intelligent thing in this entire thread you fucking retard. Stupid fucking retard lol <3

>>37443621
>rubbing it in people's noses
LOL you're fucking retarded. I'm explaining how you can have nice things like money and a place to live when you GET A FUCKING JOB AND WORK you stupid fucking idiot.
>waahhh hahhh why cant everything be handed to me!!! why do i have to put effort in stuff i want!!! Its not fair!!!!
>socially
??????

>>37443676
I like isolation

>>37443689
>i am more intelligent than you
>tips fedora

>>37443707
FUCK
OFF
WAGE
KEK

YOU ARE A FUCKING SLAVE

>>37443711
Lol, I sense that you're getting a little flustered. Is the little retard upset because everyone won't run with his delusion. I wasn't aware that not wanting to go to fucking jail makes me a normie but thanks for educating me.

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>calls everyone trying to give him real advice cunt/normie
prison isn't going to be fun. Food will taste like a sweaty ball sack, you will be chilling with tyrone whether you like it or not, you get to watch tv once a month if that.
(If you get protective custody, then the whole prison will know you're a bitch and you won't be able to go back to normal custody, if you do they gonna rape you for sure) and people lose their mind in PC after a week, you think you'll last the rest of your life?
seriously kill yourself if you don't think minimal effort isn't worth it to avoid that fate
>>37443711
>I like isolation
try it anon, try to be absolutely alone for 2 weeks no internet no anything just stare at a wall and tell us it was ok

>>37443732
You don't have to want to go to jail, because lots of people are in situations where they don't need to even consider it, but if you're in my position, it is unironically the best choice. You can't even comprehend the choice though because you're a fucking normie who is only here to laugh at robots.

>>37442547
just go to the looney bin op

>>37443711
This'll be the isolation where you get your window into the hallway and nothing else. Metal bed, toilet, only company.
Other people in the isolation cells flood the toilets just to get an hour outside. Others will just try to kill themselves to get out.
The crazy jail is a better choice. Get drugged up and do what you want. But just make sure you get there forever. Life is fucked if you get released or sent back with normies

>>37443755
>purposely ignoring the multiple times I stated i will have tv and books in order to argue your bullshit
at least try when you're trolling you fuck.

>>37443755
>try to be absolutely alone for 2 weeks no internet no anything just stare at a wall and tell us it was ok
not op but i've done that it was just boring as hell it wasn't that bad

>>37443777
what country are you in op? mr robot pls

>>37443718
>using wage cuck unironically as an insult
uh you know it's just a meme right? You do realize how that isn't an actual insult?
Slave to what? I have very flexible hours and I work from home (which I pay for) if I have to approve some drawings
>HAHAHAHA I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU HAVE A STEADY INCOME YOU WORKED FOR!! HAHA I BET YOU BUY STUFF YOU WANT, FAGGOT
Yeah having this house full of shit I wanted to buy with money feels real dumb, guilty.

lol get a job kid. Mommy isn't going to protect you in her womb forever

>>37443757
So I cannot even comprehend your situation but you can hyper analyze what I said to determine my life style? Yeah cause that makes a lot of sense. If you want you can suck my dick and live in my backyard for free. I'd feed and water you, it'd be sorta like prison since you really wanna go there.

>>37443797
America and even they have tv and books in isolation. But another anon mentioned a Scandinavian country so I wrote that down as an option.

jesus the amount of normalfags in this thread. glad I don't come here that much anymore.

>>37443811
they have books yes but the tv thing is rare you don't get a tv in your cell.

>>37443803
I trust you not to rape me about as much as I trust the prisoners. So no.

>>37443802
>straight up admitting you're a normie
jesus christ you're a sad cunt for being here. It's not just a meme, but you would never understand that

>>37443815
I know right. This place is fucking dead. What is the best place to find actual robots to discuss this?

>>37443824
wrong

>>37443828
>not knowing what a normie is
Absolutely embarrassing.
No skin off my ass, at least I have a roof over my head and won't get raped ever.
Also money.

I heard you can get a long sentence if your check bounces or some shit.

>>37443846
You are the very definition of a normie and trying to shame me for not fitting into your normie world. Honestly why are you on this board?

>>37443833
there really isn't a good place anymore normalfags invaded everything. are you sure they all tvs? I watched a few videos about jail and none of them had tvs in their rooms

>>37443861
All the ones in that series called prison 2017 on youtube have them. They have clear backs on them.

>>37443870
well damn if I get kicked out im stealing a car so i can live the comfy life in jail

I went to prison for a few months and it was mostly chill but would'nt want to go back again. I was in a 5 bed cell with 3 other guys, we had a TV but the guy that owned it blasted it loud all day long. The other guys were in their 50s as this was a non smoking cell.Mind you it was Poland, not aryan brotherhood crips bloods surenos bullshit in America. We were allowed to go "out" for an hour a day which was a 5m by 10m cage and since I was a good boy the CO let me out often to play ping pong with other good boys. I tried reading books my family brought me to stave off boredom but could not be bothered to. I was mostly sleeping through the day. Tried lifting also to kill boredom. 3/10 I do not recommend it.

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>>37443785
>was just boring as hell
ok if op is fine with being bored as hell for the rest of his life then cool
>>37443833
I'm leaving op. I hope you go to prison and while laying in tyrone's arms, realize how easy it would have been to have a comfortable life and spend the rest of your life regretting it.
>I still think your baiting

>>37443894
You're just a troll. You have been told countless times about tv and books, plus the fact I wont be anywhere near Tyrone, but you keep saying the same stupid shit. Go troll someone else please.

>>37443892
Well I like reading and would be doing it anyway. I think the recommendation will be a fair bit higher if you had your own room and liked reading.

>>37443350
1) Scandinavia is real fucking expensive, travel is expensive in general
2) Getting citizenship there is almost impossible without pristine education or a job waiting for you or if you ain't a negro
3) Northern Europe has different prisons and not all of them are hotel-tier
4) You'll just get extradited back to US and face burger justice

By far the stupidest post itt and yet OP replied to it.

>>37442547
>not involve me hurting anyone?
Because you wrote that I'll give you my earnest oinion, anon.
Don't do it, you will suffer a lot and it will break you comletely. Try to earn enough money to rent a cheap flat and hire a housekeeper. If that is to expensive inform yourself about sheltered housing for people with psychological problems or (depends on your age) for teenagers with problems. If you don't live in a 3rd world shitthole there is a program similar to that for sure.

Don't give up robot. Inform yourself and stay legal. I'm cheering for you.

>>37443921
>1) Scandinavia is real fucking expensive, travel is expensive in general
why does this matter if im not gonna buy anything and just get arrested, I think I could get my parents to buy the flight, or just steal it from their card.

>2) Getting citizenship there is almost impossible without pristine education or a job waiting for you or if you ain't a negro
I don't want or need citizenship

>3) Northern Europe has different prisons and not all of them are hotel-tier
It doesn't need to be hotel tier.

>4) You'll just get extradited back to US and face burger justice
this is your only good point and idk if it's true yet i'll need to look it up


>>37443939
Will i be completely looked after for the foreseeable future in one of those?

I spent 4months in prison in new zealand

literally was the worst time of my life

fights every few days, people fuck with you in the first few weeks (pick fights, trip you, steal your shit and food, standover you and steal your nicotine patch)

absolute fucking boredom, at one point due to a massive fight we were locked in23 hours a day for 3 weeks straight, 3 to a cell, so you better get along with your cellmates

if your weak or don't stand up to yourself in the first couple weeks prepare to just get fucked with your whole time, have your shit stolen, people threaten you for money form the outside, threaten your family by calling them form the cell, or cellphones.

prisons are full of drugs, which leads to people owing people a LOT of money, with no way to get it, which leads to fights

you need to be a pedo or seriously have your life threatened to get in protective custody. you can't just ask to go there, someone needs to like beat the shit out of you. protective is a lot worse than normal prison, to stop pepole like you going there as the 'easy way out'. tv is censored, you can't just watch movies all day

there's tonnes of violent wild unpredicatable niggers

I mean for fucks sake this is dumbest thread I've read. Prison is a punishment for bad, violent, theiving men, put into close confinement for long periods of time with bad food and nothing to do. everyone is on edge/bordlerine insane

think of it like sitting at the back of a bus, then 25 niggers come and sit around you blocking you in, they're loud boisterious, pushing eachother around screaming and fucking with you, insulting you etc. now the bus breaks down and you're stuck like that for 5 months straight. you got to shit in a bucket in the corner, in front of the niggers who make sexual comments about you

it's fucking awful, it's a punishment. please don't do this op

how fucking hard is it to get a job, move into a shared house, pay your rent for your room and shitpost in your spare time

>>37443970
because im not a disgusting normie. I have a problem with the very way the system is designed to fuck people like me. So i want to use the system to benefit myself.

I won't be in new zealand with abos. I'm 99% confident you can request protection in most countries.

Maybe you can just act insane and get out into an asylum.

>>37444006
well enjoy your time then, I guess

from the documentaries I've seen us prisons are way worse, you have niggers and mexians, AB etc, whereas in nz we only have maoris

enjoy your stay

>>37444031
Thanks origorino

>>37443960
>Will i be completely looked after for the foreseeable future in one of those?
A hired houskeeper will look after things als long as you pay him/her. I can't sa much about the social programms since they differ a lot. Inform yourself at least. Call some psychosocial care organisaions, your local youth center maybe organisations that help the homeless and look up similar organisations. Thell them about your problem and ask for advice. They will help you or at least tell you who you could ask for help.

>>37444048
Maybe. it's really hard for me to change plans once i've made them and I really decided to go to prison. It will take me like another week before I build up the nerve to ring someone about any programs. I'll think about it I guess.

>>37443960
You need to be a citizen of their country to get locked up in there, retard. Even then they'll probably send you back because no-one wants to look after a violent manchild.

>>37444048
Also: don't be to shy to call them.
Sometimes everyone of us needs help and those people deal with problematic situations of others on a regular basis. They won't mock you if you stay polite.

>>37444077
Should I tell them about the prison plan? Think they'd give me a good crime to commit because they don't like violence?

>>37444076
Proof? Also im not violent.

>>37444075
Use this week and look up organisations that could possibly help you. But try it. You have nothing to loose here. Worst case is, that they can't help you but if you go to prison, you are throwing your life away. No one will employ someone who has been in prison and prison life is hard and will probalby break you since you seem to be sensible.

>>37444090
>Should I tell them about the prison plan?
I don't think so. Tell them you are on the edge, need help and don't know how to proceed.

>>37444107
I don't want to be employed ever though. I'll google some stuff and think about it.

>>37444090
Google "Extradition law in the United States", goofy.

>>37444138
I won't be in the united states goofy

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>>37442547
wow, OP.
You need to find a job and become a normie, seriously. Man up and grow up.

>>37444143
read the thread and pretend you are the other normie that was posting. All the replies I gave him also apply to you. Now fuck off.

>>37444130
>>37444130
>I don't want to be employed ever
That is your currrent legit opinion. But you close the door forever and can never change this opinion in the future if you go to prison.

Also: good luck anon. You can do it.

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>>37444141
peep an image, it's me looking at you

>>37444180
?? wot
orig

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>>37444152
I could show you the path, but it must be you to go throught it. If you're ignorant it's your choice. Those who don't want to learn or listen are truly dumb. You got 2 years and one mouth for a reason.

You're just a retard who doesn't want to work and help the world evolve, you just want everything for free and be comfortable with no efford, like a fucking communist. Go to work and earn your comfort, you'll realize being comfortable is great but working is also great and positive and it feels better to achieve your goals than just have the stuff. Achieving comfort makes it feel much more rewarding and pleasant.

If you lived here in Portugal you would know.

>>37444219
2 hears*

>>37444219
This is the most normie post i've ever seen. Kindly kill yourself.

>>37444219
2 ears* for fuck sake

>>37444227
>2 hears
>for hearing
try again

I browse this imageboard since 2006 and its rare to read OP this dumb. If bait congrats

>>37444250
Nah, you should game over and try again your life.

I thought about it, don't think it's a great idea but this is what i would do : You should probably start doing some serious hacking if you don't get caught you have money to have food delivered at home and buy a washing machine. If you get caught you go to jail.

OP how old are you?

Also chances are very high you will end up as delicious loli bait for tyrone, in about 10 minutes after arriving in prison, you already told us you are rather small in stature, together with your childish mindset even I kinda want to rape you.

At the very least make sure to buy a dildo and loosen up your asshole in the coming two months, before going through with your plan, then it won't hurt that much.

>>37442547
just get into a fist fight with your parents and slap them only when they bring it up and they'll leave you alone but make sure it's not serious enough to call the cops please don't do this weird extra shit

>>37442575
Let's face it, if he's at the point of considering this it's impossible for him to integrate.

Anyone else hope OP goes through with it?

OP, please post updates when you get on the inside.

10/10 thread

>>37444422
That will be impossible. I'll post updates the day of the crime and the day of my trial probably. That's if I go through with it.

>>37444305
24

>>37444257
I don't think it's that dumb

>>37443222
>all prisons are the same as the ones in muh shows

>>37444550
>implying they're not
The prison system has state rules but they're all very much the same across the country

>>37443094
Sounds like you're living the dream their pal, congratulations. How do you support yourself though?

>>37444592
Disability bux for being fucked in the head. Got a psychiatrist to put me on there, since then the government supports me.

>>37444650
Not bad, take what you can get as they say.

>>37443014
no lol that's 20 years
it's better op rape a kid, which gives like 5 years

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OP here. Just told my parents about the plan, they told me I was a fucking idiot, but still want me out, what the fuck these people are honestly insane, they're forcing my hand but freak out at the solution I come up with. Honestly fuck the programs you guys suggested, i'm getting this show the road tonight. Fuck my parents, fuck society and fuck all of you negative normies. I'm off to get arrested, i'll see you faggots when I get out, i'll take some screenshots so I can post a new thread and update people in a few years, maybe a few of you real robots will still be here then.

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>>37444770
kinda agree with your parents.
Good luck.

>>37444770
I just wanted to say that I've enjoyed this thread. Probs the most original bait I've read in a while.

>>37442547
don't be retarded.
get a job at some fast food joint and find people looking for roommates on craigslist or something

>>37442971
buy a load of drugs an get caught, fake a robbery without touching anyone. destroy any public or some private property. set an office on fire during weekends when nobodys there. do everything at once to get the accousions added together.